Kurt kissed Blaine's shoulder, and rolled to lie along his side. "Mmmmm that was so good."

Stroking a hand along Kurt's sweaty back, Blaine stretched and hummed in agreement. "Well, we had to celebrate. What's your role again?"

"Stelios."

Scrunching up his face, Blaine tried to remember details from the movie. "It's been ages since I saw the movie."

"Yeah, me too. I don't want to copy what Fassbender did, but the audience will probably expect certain iconic scenes." Kurt shifted the covers over them.

Blaine looked at Kurt, assessing him. "Are you sleepy? We could watch it now if you want."

Kurt nodded, grabbing his tablet. "Hmmm.... let's see if it's on Netflix."

They soon had the movie '300' playing. 

A scene had a youth creeping along with a spear at night, and then a black wolf snarls at him as it creeps closer. The wolf circles the boy, as he retreats calmly into a chasm, and soon stabs the wolf with the spear. 

“How will they do the wolf onstage?” Blaine murmured.

Kurt chuckled. “You saw Lion King on Broadway. How did they do a stampede of wildebeest onstage? Theatrical storytelling.” 

The narrator spoke of a huge army approaching, and the film went into dramatic music with slo-mo shot of men on horseback cresting the hill.

“Well, if they always attack in slo-mo, the army will be quite easy to defeat.” Kurt quipped. He loved watching movies with Blaine, sharing snarky comments as they played.

The Spartans kick the Persian messengers into their well.

“Ewww! Is that their main well? The water won’t taste that good for a while.” Blaine joked.

Kurt glanced his way. “Was that huge hole a well? They really should put a guard rail around it. I’m surprised more people don’t fall down it on a daily basis.” 

The King consults with the priests on a mountaintop about going to war. The priests are very ugly, with crooked teeth and diseased skin. The King throws them a bag of gold coins in offering. 

“He should have given them a bag of Clearasil, not gold coins.” Blaine chuckled.

The King sits on the bed, caressing his Queen, and they discuss the options. 

“Cersei!” Blaine pointed out. “She looks good with dark hair.”

It went into a stylized sex scene. Slo-mo, quick images of the queen gasping, with black screens for a second between the images.

“Slo-mo sex! Is there anything they won’t slo-mo in this movie?” Kurt drawled. 

The next scene had the King reviewing a group of 300 soldiers. One of them shouted out “We are with you, sire. For Sparta! For Freedom! To the death!” 

Blaine chuckled. “Are all Spartans this shouty? ‘This is Sparta!’”

“Pass the Ketchup!” Kurt joked back.

“Do you want more beans?!!” Blaine shouted in return, with a smirk. 

Kurt made a funny face. “Um, the character that shouted that is Stelios.”

“Ahhhh, so you’ll be the shouty Spartan.” Blaine nudged him. 

Rolling his eyes, Kurt shrugged. “They might not follow this movie script. I think they are going back to the Frank Miller graphic novel mostly.”

The King explains to some politicians that he isn’t going to war. He’s going for a ‘stroll’, and the 300 men are his personal bodyguard.

“Mmmmm I wouldn’t mind guarding that body. Gerald Butler is seriously hot in this.” Blaine said, his tone one of definite appreciation.

Kurt wasn’t offended at all. “Mmmmm Hmmmm…” He agreed emphatically. The man was perfectly toned. 

An emissary appeared in an elaborate chair carried by slaves, whipping them on the way. The Spartans were building a stone wall that the new man mocked, saying it was nothing against the Persian forces. Stelios does a dramatic slo-mo leap through the air with his sword, cutting off the man's arm holding the whip. 

"Woah! So how will you do that onstage?" Blaine marvelled. 

Kurt nodded. "This jump and another later on I'll do wearing wires and the harness." He was nervous and excited about it. They were iconic scenes from the movie. 

The ground was shaking like an earthquake as the numerous enemy soldiers approached. The King made a rousing speech to his 300 soldiers. 

Blaine chuckled. "It's so common in movies before a battle for the leader to give a rousing speech like that...but even if he's shouting, do you think anyone past the second row really hears him?"

"Speak up, we can't hear you back here!" Kurt chimed in. 

"I think he said 'Blessed are the cheese makers...'" Blaine smirked back. 

"What's so special about the cheese makers?" 

"Well, obviously, this is not meant to be taken literally. It refers to any manufacturers of dairy products."

Kurt grinned, chuckling as he moved closer to Blaine. They had their own jokes, built up from years of common experiences and movies they watched together. Half of their friends just shook their heads at them when they joked around like this, not even bothering to find out what they were talking about. 

Blaine smelled really good, and Kurt shifted even closer, nuzzling in to deliver a kiss near his ear before turning back to watch the movie. 

Wrapping his hand along Kurt's back, Blaine pulled him in close. His other hand went to rest on Kurt's thigh. 

On screen, the Spartans were in full battle. Fantastically fit men, wearing only small dark briefs, long red capes, and helmets. Fighting beautifully, almost like a dance, athletic and confident in their skills. 

Kurt shifted slightly. "Um...is it bad that I find the men hot? I mean, it's a battle scene, but their bodies..."

Chuckling, Blaine shook his head. "I'm thinking the same thing..."

By the end of the battle, Blaine's hand was sliding up Kurt's thigh and he was turning to meet him in a hot kiss. The movie continued, unwatched, as hands and mouths went everywhere.

---

A little later, Blaine and Kurt cuddled naked under a blanket, watching the rest of the movie. 

"Your character gets a lot of the best lines, and those two jumps are incredible." Blaine commented.

Kurt smirked. "And I die holding hands with the King. Don't be jealous." 

Blaine raised his eyebrows. "Hmmm...you are going to be in a cast of dozens of hot, fit men for months with training and then the show. Are there even any women in it besides the Queen?" 

Biting his lip, Kurt shrugged. "I don't think so."

Rolling his eyes, Blaine gave Kurt's hand a squeeze. "I trust you, Kurt. What we have is special and this is an incredible opportunity. It's the type of role you've been wanting for years."

Looking down, Kurt took a few deep breaths. When he met Blaine's gaze again, there was a flicker of doubt in his. "It's exciting, but I'm terrified I'll screw this up. What if they decide my voice is too high? Or I do all the workouts and my body doesn't get very muscular?"

Blaine moved his hands to Kurt's upper arms, stroking soothingly. "Your vocal range is similar to mine. Practice your lines with a lower tone until it becomes second nature to say them like that. There aren't that many lines in the show."

Kurt nodded at the advice. Blaine knew him well enough to know when he needed comforting and a good listener, and when he needed suggestions. 

"Just talk to the trainer about your concerns when you start. He'll design a plan to get you good results. Look at Fassbender in the movie. He was toned but not bulky. I think you could look like him if you work hard for a few months." Blaine said, meaning every word. 

This was a very different role for Kurt, much more masculine and physical, but he could do it. 

It took Kurt a minute, looking Blaine in the eyes and seeing his assurance, his true belief in Kurt. It bolstered his confidence, knowing he had Blaine in his corner. 

"I love you so fucking much." Kurt said softly, leaning in for a kiss. 

Blaine smirked against his lips. "Same here." 

---

-Blessed are the Cheesemakers: They are making a reference to a scene in the Monty Python film 'Life of Brian'. A clip is here.

-300: The comic book series by Frank Miller (Sin City, The Dark Knight Returns) from 1998 is a fictional retelling of the Battle of Thermophylae from the perspective of King Leonidas of Sparta. It is now available in graphic novel format. The movie version was released in 2006. Wikipedia: "The film received mixed reviews, receiving acclaim for its original visuals and style, but criticism for favoring visuals over characterization and its depiction of the ancient Persians in Iran, a characterization which some had deemed racist; however, the film was a box office success, grossing over $450 million." It was directed by Zack Synder (Watchmen, Suckerpunch) and starred Gerald Butler and Lena Headley.
A hilarious look at all the things wrong with the film is here.

-Battle of Thermophylae: This battle was fought between an alliance of Greek city-states, led by King Leonidas of Sparta, and the Persian Empire of Xerxes I over the course of three days, during the second Persian invasion of Greece. It took place simultaneously with the naval battle at Artemisium, in August or September 480 BC, at the narrow coastal pass of Thermopylae ("The Hot Gates").
Xerxes had amassed a huge army and navy (estimated between 100,000-150,000), and set out to conquer all of Greece. A Greek force of approx 7,000 marched to block the pass. The vastly outnumbered Greeks held off the Persians for seven days (including three of battle) before the rear-guard was annihilated in one of history's most famous last stands.
During two full days of battle, the small force led by Leonidas blocked the only road by which the massive Persian army could pass. After the second day, a local resident named Ephialtes betrayed the Greeks by revealing that a small path led behind the Greek lines. Leonidas, aware that his force was being outflanked, dismissed the bulk of the Greek army and remained to guard their retreat with 300 Spartans, 700 Thespians, and 400 Thebans, fighting to the death.
Both ancient and modern writers have used the Battle of Thermopylae as an example of the power of a patriotic army defending its native soil. The performance of the defenders is also used as an example of the advantages of training, equipment, and good use of terrain as force multipliers and has become a symbol of courage against overwhelming odds.
(This passage is edited down from the Wikipedia article).