Whoever You Are, I Love You
DarrenCrisstastic
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Whoever You Are, I Love You: The day of labor 2/2


K - Words: 9,945 - Last Updated: Jan 27, 2013
Story: Closed - Chapters: 3/? - Created: Jan 20, 2013 - Updated: Jan 27, 2013
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Author's Notes: A/N: Hi! Thanks for the reviews.To the one who commented that I need a beta: I always look but can't find anyone willing. It also happened that some people agreed to beta my work but never did in the end. As long as no one is willing right now to do it for me, you have to live with the product because I can't do any more but read it and read it and edit the mistakes I find. The English classes in school were really basic. We only learned to count to 20, colors, and how to introduce yourself. All vocables and the bit of grammar I know I learned through internet, a few books, and fanfictions. That's why, I really try my best, I am sorry if people can't read it because they can't stand my mistakes. Sorry.Okay! Let's continue! This is the second piece of part 2. It took me really long to read it again and again. I worked full 2 nights to edit it. I hope you will all like it.Warnings: Detailed description of a man giving birth, pains, a bit of angst, blood lost, talk about abortion and adoption, I don't think it's character bashing but mentions of my disdain for a character in this series.Again, I am really excited since I never wrote anything like this before and would love some reviews to know what you thought about it.

At the hospital, Kurt could directly move into a room since his doctor already finished the formal papers for him. He changed with Finn's help into a hospital gown and set down, playing with his smart phone between the contractions.

He wrote Mercedes and Isabelle that he was in labor, now. Mercedes wished him good luck and was sad that she couldn't be there to support him. Isabelle asked if she could visit or if he wanted his rest. He told her to come over and bring chocolate with her.

It took an hour for Dr. Ted to finally visit his room and examine him.

"Well, Kurt. Looks like it will be a long night for us. There are some things we need to keep an eye on. The most important part is, you decided against C-section that I would always recommend by male pregnancies. Meaning, since you have reproductive organs similar to a woman. You can give a normal birth but instead of vaginal, it will be anal. We discussed that already. But for men to give birth the traditional way is much more difficult and hurts more. Men, that decide for this we normally give a high analgesic. But we can't give you that."

"Why is that?" Kurt searched blindly for Finn's hand and squeezed tight in his worry.

Dr. Ted sighed. "Kurt, the birth canal isn't open enough yet. That means the child should lay in a way different position right now. From the sonography it looks like his body is already in position. Your labor wil take at least 4 more hours. In that time the unborn could have moved in about 180°. That will be a complication.

"You still have the chance to change to a C-section. You will only have a small scar, your body and your organs will profit from it. Most men doing it the traditional way say, sex isn't the same anymore, are unsatisfied and complain over hemorroids. Especially in your young age you shouldn't risk anything.

"There are the most different reasons why breech births happen. In your case, I tip on too small hips. But the risk is high, your child could be strangled dead by the umbilical cord for example."

"So, you say, I should definitely change my mind?" Finn sat down to hold his paling brother.

The doctor nodded. "Yes. 100%"

"How much longer can I think about it?" The heavy boy wanted to know.

The doctor looked at his notes. "2-3 hours. We will check on you every hour for now."

"Okay. Thank you." Dr. Ted gave him a handshake and then made his way out to the next patient."

With the doctor gone, Kurt felt the other 3 watching him. He sighed and grabbed for an ice cube from his side table. "Could you all leave me alone for a while?" They stared at him with worry.

But Finn hesitated. "Dude! I can't leave you alone with this." He argued."You need me by your side!" The tall man squeezed Kurt around his shoulders.

Kurt breathed, exhausted, feeling a new wave of the labor pains approaching. "Please. Just for a while. I need to sort my thoughts and I need to be alone for that. You can stay outside and wait for when I call you in. Okay?"

Rachel took Finn's hand and brought him out of the room, Brody following and closing the door behind him.

A new contraction came and Kurt muffled his groan. He turned his head and bit in the scratchy pillow. He breathed the way he learned to stay relaxed as possible. After a few minutes the pain lessened, again.

He tried to call his dad but went directly to voicemail The same happened calling Carole. He thought about who to possibly call now. He scrolled through his contacts, stopping by Mercedes, then Tina. But Tina was one of the people that didn't know of his baby. He even considered calling Puck.

Then there was Mr. Schuester but Kurt never got really along with him. That man was always more fixed on helping Finn.

He stopped at seeing Blaine's name. He opened the browser and went to his facebook page. There were new pictures. His brother came home for Christmas and was staying for the whole winter season. He and Blaine were in Columbus for a show and some sports game. There was a picture of Blaine, face smeared with mustard, laughing out loud directly at the camera, the skin around his eyes wrinkling.

Kurt searched for his relationship status. Everytime Kurt looked at it, he saw that big word 'single', slapping him in the face. After Kurt left, Blaine's status remained 'In a relationship with Kurt Hummel'. After a month he changed it to 'It's complicated' and it needed two more months to make him 'single'. He looked at some more pictures of Blaine before going back to his phone contact list and searching for someone to talk to.

He found someone who maybe actually could counsel him...

"Ms. Pillsbury's office here. How I may help you?"

"..." Kurt hesitated. Was that a good idea? Should he really talk with her about it?

"Hello? ...Is this a prank?" He can't talk with her! She was a freak, too with her OCD and he remembered that she laughed at him when he auditioned for Tony. But she could still maybe help him, said another voice in his head, a much more desperate voice. Maybe she had some pamphlet...

"...Hi." Kurt mumbled.

"Hi!" Said the school counselor. "Who am I talking to? Which grade are you?"

Kurt breathed loud in the phone, feeling the contractions coming back."K-K-Kurt. It's Kurt Hummel. Graduate."

"Are you hurt? You sound like you are in pain."

"No, it's fine!" He squeaked.

There was an awkward silence, then Emma said, "Wait a moment."

Kurt could hear some background noises, then 2 or 3 voices were talking.

"It's Kurt." That was Emma.

"Wasn't he with Rachel and Finn in New York?" A woman questioned. Coach Sylvester? She knew where he was? Creepy.

"Both of them were supposed to come down for the wedding." That deep voice sounded like Coach Beiste.

"Maybe something happened with them." That was Schue's afraid voice. Of course he would think it was about them.

"Or something is with Kurt. He had problems saying his name, maybe he needs help." Miss Pillsbury urged.

Schue sighed. "Should I talk with him?"

"Give me the phone." Ordered Sue. There was a crack and a little fight for the phone.

Then Emma said, a bit breathless, "I think, I should talk with him. He wouldn't have called me if he didn't need to."

"I think Porcelain must have lost my number or he would have called me." The dragon lady sounded angry and... hurt... maybe?

"Maybe he wants to know why he didn't get an invite for the wedding. We should have pressed Finn more why Kurt abandoned us all over the summer." Kurt became angry, listening to their shit. It was laughable, that a teacher who prided himself in being there for all his students, said so... mean things about him.

He thought about cutting the phone call when Emma spoke to him again. "Kurt, how can I help you?"

Kurt took a deep breath, rubbing his hard belly. Don't freak out. Just tell her! "Are you sitting down?"

A moment silence, again. "I am sitting down?" She sounded curious what would come next.

"I am pregnant," he blurted out.

There was a moment of shock and then a delicate, "If you'll excuse me for a minute. Just a minute!"

"Is it about the wedding?" Schue. Kurt gnashed his teeth.

"No, Will. It's not. I must ask you all to leave, I am in a counseling session now."

"Is someone giving him shit?"

"I can't answer that, Sue."

"Is the munchkin okay?" Coach Beiste sounded worried.

"Yes, Shannon. He is okay, I think. Please, all leave now. No, you can't stay, Will. It's private."

He could hear a door close and Emma was back on the phone. "Are you okay?"

He sniffed, "I don't think so."

He told her about when he knew he was pregnant, what happened and why he had to leave, how Finn followed to support him, why he had to abandon everyone else, so his secret would stay a secret and about his labor and the decision he had to make.

"My parents are still on the plane and I needed someone to help me. I wanted a traditional birth, anal for men. So my bond to my son would be stronger than with a C-Section. I read alot about it in magazines. But now it's all dangerous and I feel so helpless. I don't want to kill my child. I gave up everything for him because I knew he would be worth it." Kurt sobbed in his phone.

"Who is there with you?" Ms. Pillsbury asked, kindly.

"Finn, Rachel, Brody, and Quinn and Isabelle, my boss, they should also be here by now. I asked them all to wait outside, so I could think better." He licked his dry lips and reached for his water cup. "Do you think, I should talk to Quinn since she already gave birth, once?"

Emma looked over her pamphlets but found nothing for something that special. The ginger woman wrote a note to look for 'more special' pamphlets. She sighed, "I don't think so."

"Why?"

"Well, first of all, she is not a mother. You are two, totally different persons, Kurt. I know, I am not a mother myself but I will marry soon and maybe we will have children, someday but I really care about all of you, like every student is somehow my child, in a way.

"I think, you should not listen to anything Quinn may have to say about parenthood . She decided to give her daughter away and she regretted it. You decided to become a father and from all I heared you tell me, you won't ever regret that. I believe, you will be good at making a decision on your own, since you are already more grown up than all your friends. You are fully an adult now, Kurt."

Kurt gulped. "But I need an advice! I need help, I can't do it on my own."

He could hear her smile, "And you don't have to."

"But you said-"

"I said you shouldn't take advice from Quinn. But there were people who helped you through these months. Would you take advice from a person that regrets her actions or would you consider a person you trust and love to help you?"

"Oh," he breathed.

"Right," she chuckled.

"I think, I know who can help me."

"Didn't I help you?" She joked.

"You helped me a lot!" Kurt assured her, taking a sip from his water.

She laughed and said, "Great! One last thing before we end the session. Kurt, will we ever see you again?"

There was a genuine smile on his lips when he assured, "You all will meet me and my son this summer, I promise."

There was crick-sound, then, "It's a date."

"Of course. And I will call you on your wedding day. I will still be in the hospital but I will try to persuade Finn to go to Ohio."

Emma sighed. "Will will be crashed if he won't be there. Okay, now, good bye Kurt. I will see you in summer. I am so happy for you!" She sounded excited, first, then asked a bit shy, "And please allow me to tell the others?"

He thought about it. He wasn't allowed to contact Blaine, that's why only a few from the New Directions knew. But Blaine transferred back to Dalton and from Kurt's facebook stalking, it looked like his ex had no contact with anyone from Lima anymore. "You are allowed to tell Mr. Schue, ND and the coaches. I will hunt you if anything goes on Israel's blog. Now, excuse me. I have to give birth soon." There were still some words of congratulation on both sides until they finished.

The moment the call ended, the door opened for a new examination.

The birth canal looked good. The baby didn't move much, to surprise of the doctor. Because of that, he ordered some extra tests to be sure everything was alright with the child. Dr. Ted asked him again, if he decided yet and Kurt replied with a steady no. A bit down, Dr. Ted promised him that someone will come soon to bring him to the other tests and he would see him in another hour, again.

Being in labor was shit. It'd been hours and would still take hours until the worst will be over.

He remembered Quinn's pregnancy. Her waters broke at Regionals and an hour later Beth was born. He knows that was really fast and other labors take hours, and male labors take even longer, since with a male body you can't just "lose" waters.

Alone again, he called for Finn who rushed into the room.

"Are you alright?"

Kurt shook his head. "'Am not," he choked feeling the tears again. He moved to the side of the bed and patted the space next to him. Finn sat down and Kurt turned on his side to rest against him. "I tried calling our parents but they are still one the plane with the phone shut off.

"I called Ms. Pillsbury and we had a long talk." He hid his face in his brother's wide shoulder. "She told me to talk to the person, I trust the most. So, here I am, doing it now. Help me." Kurt pleaded.

Finn was in awe, "You trust me the most? Even after our bad start in high school?"

Kurt bit his lip in guilt. "To be honest, the person I still trust more than anyone is Blaine. But I can't talk to him. Maybe never again. And then there are our parents, you know Dad always knows what to do.

"But I talked to Ms. Pillsbury and I knew, I was blind because you was here for me all these months. The most important months of my life and you did everything I asked you to and more. I know, you are the right person I can talk to."

"Thank You," said Finn with a hoarse voice.

They shared a hug and became silent for a while.

"I thought about it, too. Y'know? I understand why you want to do that anal-thing and I understand why Dr. Teddy urges you to decide for the C-Section... But do you know this feeling when you wanted something and you know it's right for but everyone else tells you it's not?"

Kurt's face showed confusion while he shook his head no. "I don't really understand what you mean to be honest."

Finn sat up straight taking Kurt's hand and explained, "Okay. Remember when I wanted to draw myself in? I really wanted that but then Mr. Schue told everyone that's not the right thing for me and I was totally lost.

"They said I should go to college, or try for a football scholarship. I don't think college is the right thing for me right now, and I don't want to try out some classes, just so. I was not good enough for a scholarship. That's why I began to doubt myself. I thought before, I could do what I want, singing or become a profi footballer. That was all so unrealistic. I noticed, I am limited for what I can do for a future and the only thing I saw possible for me, was the army but everyone told me no, like I am stupid. That really hurt.

"Then Rachel sang that song and I thought marrying Rachel and follow her following her dreams would be cool. But even if we would have married , I still would be lost. I always secretly thought about the army and couldn't let that go, to be honest.

"Still being insecure, I fought with Rachel to go to Callyfornia instead of New York. I did other stupid things, like applying for an acting school and Mr. Schue and Rachel even encouraged me. Big fail.

"Then, after graduation, a few days before our wedding date, I knew, I should at least try out for the army. Instead of marrying her, I send her off to New York. I broke both our hearts. But I believe, we would never have been happy with just our love and nothing else to be with. I think, we are just beginning to find ourself..."

He became a bit lost in his thoughts of a maybe future with Rachel before he continued, "The first weeks of summer, when I was out and you all thought, I was hanging out with Puck, I was secretly preparing to leave home. But then you became pregnant and the need to leave for the army vanished in an instant. It wasn't like following Rachel like a dog but like I knew, I had to help you and be there for you. It was the first time I knew what was right for me."

Kurt looked at his brother, like really looked at him. "Wow," he said. "So, you say, I should stay traditional?"

"I say, you should stay with your plan until it's important to change it. If it becomes risky for you and that little guy, I want you to do the C-Section." Finn patted his belly like a pet.

Kurt cuddled close to his brother, feeling a lot better now. "Thank You, Finn. I think I will take your advice." Finn moved his hand up to pat his hair. "Finn?"

"Hm?" He hummed.

"You are today more a hero for me than you ever was in Glee Club." Kurt smiled up at his brother.

Finn had teary eyes."Thank you."

"No. Thank you."

They laughed, hugging each other.

Someone knocked on the door.

Kurt turned his head to the door, "Come in!"

He got really tired from hurting so much and would love to take a nap sooner than later but he also knew, that they would take him away for a few tests soon and should stay awake for that.

First entered Rachel and Brody, both holding their own cup of coffee. Kurt missed coffee so much!

After them, Isabelle and Quinn came in. Quinn brought some flowers and Isabelle a big teddy bear, flowers and a card, signed from everyone in the office.

"Where is my chocolate?" He asked her as hello. They both came over and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"Hi, Kurt!" Quinn smoothed his bangs away and took a look at him. "Gosh, you look fat."

She laughed when Kurt grumbled, "Don't say that."

Isabelle eyed the hospital gown with disdain but still hugged him. The teddy bear was placed on Finn's lap and Rachel hurried around to put the flowers in a vase while Kurt opened the chocolate bar Isabelle gave him.

"How are you?" Inquired Isabelle.

"Well," Kurt sucked on a piece of chocolate, "There seem to be some complications but Finn helped me getting them solved. They will come and run some tests on me any minute and I hope to nap a bit after it." They nodded in understanding.

He ate a few pieces of the chocolate and fed Finn some whose stomach made loud, hungry noises at the the sight of food. "You shall begin your inquisition now!" He announced when he was sated. Rachel came over to sit at the foot of the bed while Brody began to record with the camera again. "After we are finished, you all will go to Brody to give your insight thoughts like in every good reality TV show but note, no cat fights!"

Isabelle asked the first question. "What name will you give him?"

Kurt ate another piece just because no old would tell off a pregnant guy for graving, before answering, "I thought about it and decided his first name should be Lloyd. It's celtic and means gray. And gray is my favourite color. Oh, and it's Andrew Lloyd Webber's middle name. So it's perfect."

Rachel, "What about a middle name? You know, he won't ever become famous without a middle name!"

Kurt laughed, "Well, that was more difficult but I think, I found a good person to name him after." He looked over at Finn. "What's your full name?"

"My mother named me Finn-Frederick Hudson." Finn made a face, prefering just Finn just fine.

Kurt smiled at his brother. "Frederick," he tried out. "Sounds nice. My son's full name will be Lloyd-Frederick Hummel." Finn pulled him into a hug, crushing his shoulders while the girls all told him what a fantastic name it was.

There followed some easy questions before:

"Will you keep him?" Asked Quinn, sight on Kurt's womb.

"Of course, I will," he replied feeling unwell under her gaze.

She continued her staring. Finn who noticed her transfixing eyes, too, stayed alert. "When I noticed, I was pregnant I hated it. I hated everyone. I hated Finn, Puck, Mr. Schue, everyone in school, my parents, my gyn, myself but overall, I hated that thing in me. If I wouldn't believe in God I would've aborted Beth.

"But then I felt her grow in me and she moved. She was real. I made her. I thought about keeping her. But after I began to forgive myself for having sex, and began to love me again, I knew that I would never get out of Ohio if I kept her. I would never again have a life if I kept her, I knew that. I loved myself too much in the end.

"Kurt, believe me, if you ever want to be happy again, you should give it away for adoption."

No one said a word, maybe they believed she was right, maybe not but Kurt thought back to Emma's words. She regrets her actions, don't take any advice from her.

"Sit down please." He pointed at a free place next to Rachel on the already crowded bed. When she sat down, he took her hands and laid them on his swollen belly. Her hands rested on the round form, bringing memories from her own pregnancy back to the surface. "Are you happy, now?" He asked her.

Her head stayed focus on the belly but her eyes glanced up at him for a moment. "I am happy. I am dating someone, have good grades, my dorm mate is nice."

"You sure?" Kurt challenged her. "Because you can't take your eyes off my child for more than a second since you entered the room."

"I am happy," she hissed at him, "There are lot of good things in my life right now!" Her hands left Kurt's belly like they were burned and she stood up and took some steps away from the bed.

"Just because there are good things in your life, means not you have to be happy about it. I think you miss your daughter and regret that you gave her away." kurt tried to argue.

"Don't say that! Where would I be now? Married to Puck, waiting for him to come home while he fucks cougar moms between pool cleaning? Beth would have been the end of my life!" Quinn was loaded and ready to leave the hospital in her anger.

"Or your life would have begun! I am not saying that adoption or even abortion is wrong. But maybe you made a wrong decision for yourself." He tried to find her eyes but she would only look out the window.

"Let's change the topic," blurted Rachel, clapping in her hands.

"Okay, Rachel. Please change the topic." Finn offered.

She looked over to her boyfriend, thinking if she could tell them now and then weaponed herself. "Kurt, while I was on my date earlier, Brody and I discussed something important."

"I asked her if we want to think about an engagement soon." Brody spoke.

"And well, I already wrote my biography. I have to be engaged by 19 and married by 25." She counted with her fingers.

Brody grinned smug over at Finn, "But she wanted the engagement not to fail like her first one. That's why, I asked her to move in with me."

"I am sorry, Kurt. But it's better this way. Babys are loud and I need my sleep. They always need something that I can't give them. They make poo! What is if I get poo in my face? I really think I shouldn't live with a baby. And Brody promised me to give me an engagement ring a few days before my 20th birthday. So it will all be perfect!" She was really excited like that was the best today happened and didn't even noticed Finn's face, who ignored Brody's shit. Kurt always thought they were both cool with each other but now, it looked like there was some tension between them. Weird.

Finn was about to say something, his eyebrows narrowed, his face a grimace, when the door opened and two nurses came to get Kurt for the tests. Kurt and his bed were rolled from the room. He looked over worried at Finn, now not able to reconcile between them.

"What is wrong with you?" Finn accused Rachel after Kurt was out. "For one day, it's not about you but all day long, you hurt and stress Kurt. Didn't you notice any of his panic attacks today? Didn't you notice that they were all about being left alone with the baby? He needs us, he needs us to be there for him!"

Rachel's face was bright red, her hands on her hips, and her foot angry tapping. "I am here for him! And don't think, I don't know you will go back to Lima, too. Burt told me earlier!"

Finn laughed like a maniac. Without Kurt's presence, he could actually fight with Rachel. "If you haven't noticed, I hate New York! It's too loud and everything is about Broadway, Fashion or Wallstreet. When you use the Underground someone will piss on you, if you drive your car you are stuck in traffic, if you go by cab, you lose a month worth salary. Yes, I am going back to Lima but between that and helping Kurt wil be at least 18 more months!"

Rachel was caught off-guard. She didn't knew that. Burt only said, Finn would leave New York and now there were feelings of guilt slowly drilling for being the only one leaving Kurt alone. But she was stubborn and she had a plan. And not even her best friend could stop her. If you see it this way, it's Kurt's fault for getting pregnant! She had to overwrite at least 5 chapters in her bio after Kurt told her about his pregnancy. After that Kurt would become a less important role since, when she becomes famous her best friend would be Barbra Streisand and she would have a love affair with the grandson of a Broadway legend."I am sorry, Finn but I can't be with you right now," she declared, making her dramatic exit. Brody put the camera down at Rachel's words and followed her out of the room.


An hour later Kurt came back from his tests and looked even more pale than usual.

"Are you okay, Kurt?" Isabelle tentavely asked.

Quinn gave Kurt an ice cube and he sucked a bit on it before replying, "'m just really tired."

"You should try a little nap, I'll wake you when the doctor comes," Finn tugged him under a thin blanket.

"Whers' Rach'?"

His big brother sighed, "She and Brody decided to get some air."

Kurt fell asleep after the next contraction. They were becoming worse, Kurt would cry out loud, tears filling his eyes and some even dropping out after he couldn't hold them in any longer. Isabelle told him, Kurt was the 4th person in the office pregnant since she was the chef. They were mostly a young team, since is more acquainted with young people. Kurt was the second man pregnant. She visited all of them in the hospital when their baby came. She said the other guy cried a lot more than Kurt and that a doctor explained to her that it hurts much more for them since their hips are a lot smaller than women's.


While Quinn was out for a smoke and Isabelle went to call the office, Finn's phone ringed.

"Hi Dad," he answered, tired.

"Hi Kiddo, we just arrived at the airport. We will be with you in an hour or so. Is still everything alright?"

Finn swallowed, "We don't really know. There are complications and Kurt's to make some decisions when the doctor's back. The baby is in a wrong position or something and it didn't move much for the last hours. There were some tests if the little guy is alright. Kurt is exhausted and is sleeping right now." He scratched his head, hesitating if he should tell the other stuff, too. "Here is a lot of drama, too. Quinn thinks Kurt should give the kid up to adoption and Rachel announced she will move out sometime the next days."

Burt sighed, "That sounds like a lot going on. How are you doing? We will be there soon and then you can relax a bit."

Finn laughed hollow. "I-I feel like I will never relax again in my life."

"It's alright, boy. When this day is over you can breathe again."


Finn was busy with doing takes of Kurt while sleeping. The heavy boy was curled on his side, fingers gently stroking over his big belly when the doctor came in. They woke Kurt and checked the baby's position again and then the opening of the birth canal. "How are the contractions?" The doctor asked.

"While he was sleeping they came all 5 minutes. He always woke up a bit and after a minute went back to sleep." Finn answered for a still tired Kurt.

"Okay, Kurt how are you? Is it bearable?"

Kurt nodded and then yawned loudly.

"I was worried something is wrong with your child since he didn't move much. His heartbeat was okay but I was afraid that there are not enough waters. The state of labor is caused by an enzyme that forces the unborn child to breathe, that induces contractions. When there are not enough waters it can happen that the unborn is choking, ensuing brain damage or even death.

"But not any of my worries were confirmed and your child is still in a most perfect position. Your birth canal is open about 8 centimeter, that would be about 3.1 inch. With a female birth I would now go to the labor room and begin the birth process. But with male birthes, I prefer the birth canal to be open by at least 10 centimers, that would be 3.9 inch and your contraction should be at least every 2 minutes. Better would be every minute.

"Now is your last chance to decide for a C-Section, Kurt. You and your baby are in not an obvious danger but it won't be easier."

Kurt, tired but awake, watched Doctor Ted closely while he talked. His eyes narrowed when his doctor explained for the first time about his worries. "If I understand right, everything is fine so far. My son is just too lazy to move and in no danger and I can proceed as planned?" Kurt asked between more yawns.

"Yes." Dr. Ted nodded.

"Then let's stay with the plan." Kurt raised his eye brows in challenge. Maybe his doctor still had some arguments left.

"Okay. Now, since everything is finally cleared, I am allowed to give you analgesics against the pain. I advise you to take them since contractions will be worse from now." The doctor wrote something down, and then looked at Kurt.

Kurt said yes and then groaned as a new wave of cramping pains began, now fully awake.

"Good. I predict you'll be in about 1 1/2 hours in the labor room. See you later."

The doctor left the room and a few minutes later a nurse came in to sedate Kurt.

"He will be a bit out," the nurse told Finn.

"How will we know he is ready?" Finn asked the nurse.

She laughed and patted his arm, feeling him up. "You will know," she replied with a giggle and giving him a seducing smile.

"Thank you!" Kurt yelled after the nurse left who ignored him in favour of hitting on Finn.

Kurt gave Finn a cheeky grin who felt uncomfortable with that nurse. "Why did she do that? I could have been the other father! That would've been awkward..."

"Gosh! Don't say that. I don't think I could handle your child."

They laughed. "Hey," Finn poked his brother. "I thought, maybe I should let them test me if can get pregnant too."

Kurt looked dumbstruck at his brother. "Why? Finn. You are not gay."

"But what is if someone rapes me one day and then I am pregnant!" Finn looked really afraid. Somehow, it was adorable.

"Dear Finn. Look at yourself. Find a guy who would dare to rape you. He should be about 9.4 feet tall, have the weight of a truck and hairy like a bear. His name is Udo and he lives in the Black Forrest."

"Where is that?"

The boy laughed loud, holding his belly. "Don't worry. He won't come and get you. Yet."


When Burt and Carole finally arrived at the hospital, they met a chain smoking Quinn at the front. Carole kissed the girl hello while Burt eyed the cigarettes. "A young girl like you shouldn't smoke so much."

"Sorry." She threw away the cigarrette. "My dormmate smokes and at some point, living with a smoker I had the same habit."

Carole linked arms with the young girl, "Would you like to accompany us inside?"

"To be honest, I don't really know. I don't even know why I am still here." Quinn looked sad to the entry doors. "I am angry at Kurt. What he said about me, he said I regret giving up my daughter."

"And do you?" Burt asked.

Quinn laughed, self-doubt visible in her face and laugh. "I don' know. I like my life right now. Boyfriend, good grades, away from Ohio... But then I would touch myself here," with her free hand she moved down to her flat womb. "And know I miss something. I can't really capture what it is."

Carole smiled, "Say, did they let you hold your daughter after she was born?" Quinn nodded. "Then it's easy to explain. A pregnancy feels really surreal, especially the first time. The moment your child is born and they let you hold it is the moment you bond. It's as easy as in falling in love. That little girl is real for you and forever on your mind. But that doesn't mean you regret giving her away, it just means you miss her."

The blond girl had teary eyes, said, "So I am not a narcist?"

"I think you gave her to a loving mother and that you gave yourself and your daughter the chance of a better life." Carole concluded, patting Quinn's arm.

Burt who watched the interaction, took both women in his arms and squeezed tight.

"Will Kurt be okay?" The blond asked the bald man.

He grinned, "I think Kurt will manage it fabulous!"

They all laughed, Burt let go of the women and they made their way inside, Quinn guiding them through the hallways. On their way to Kurt's room they passed the cafeteria where Brody and Rachel sat for the last 2 hours. They both looked tired with Rachel's eye make-up smudged like she'd cried alot. The 3 made a stop to talk to them but stopped short when they could hear the discussion.

"Rach, I don't want to hurt you," said Brody, drained.

"And why are you breaking up with me?" She sniffed.

He ruffled his hair. "Rachel! I am not breaking up with you. I said, we should maybe wait a bit before you move in with me. That's not the same!"

"It is! It is always the same, everyone is pushing me away at some point." She searched for a tissue in her pocket and blowed her nose.

"Kurt never pushed you away," he mumbled to the table.

She looked up, understanding dawning on her. "You think Finn is right!" She hissed. "What now, will you tell me, I abandoned Kurt all these month to have fun in New York?"

He laughed, his face an exhausted grimace, "I won't answer that."

Her eyes pierced him to his place. "You really think that."

Brody sighed. "What I or Finn think, doesn't matter. Thing is, Kurt believes that you was always by his side. And - maybe you should begin and be a support for him instead of trying to solve everything through song for once."

Rachel rised from her chair to dramatically walk away. Again. To make a point that she is not at fault. And ran straight into Burt, bumping her big nose on his chest.

"Ow...-" She looked up at his old face, eyes big and scared.

"Sit down, girl," he said.

Rachel explained what their fight was about and Brody threw from time to time in what he and Finn thought and said.

"Y'know, I understand why you would like to move out." Rachel's face brightened. "But I think, you shouldn't, yet." Her face fell.

"I think, you are right but the guys are right, too. You and Kurt are really similar in your antics. I think he needs you because of that. You and him living together is like having a piece of home with your musicals, sleep overs, sing offs and your Patti Lampion. I think, that is how you support him, singin' with him like back in that choir club, sitting together and eat popcorn while you two chat about boys.

"He needs you for that. Yah. If he wasn't pregnant, he would be like you, going out and take the city by storm. Meeting people and fighting for his spotlight and what you do at that school. But you know, he can't do that. He is grounded to take care of something much more important than any musical show could ever be for him."

"I know that," Rachel began, "but I am not grounded, I want to live."

"And never look back? Forget who supported you on your way to New York?"

She gulped. "But what should I do? I really want to live with Brody." She looked over at her boyfriend and gave him a shy smile. He grinned back and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Maybe there are alternatives you haven't thought of yet?" Burt suggested.

"Maybe. You are right, Sir. I haven't thought much about anything but the things I want. Brody and I will talk again and find something, so I can have both, my friends and my love." She stood up and gave Burt a hug. "Thank you. It feels like everything is better now since you're here."

Brody gave Burt a handshake and introduced himself as Brody, Rachel's soon to be fiancé.

All 5 continued their way to Kurt's room, collecting Isabelle on their way. Isabelle was ecstatic to finally meet Burt and told him what a talent Kurt was and that she would never let go off him again. "Really. He will always have a place at ! I am already planning to promote him when he comes back. I really need his insight for my next collection."

When they entered Kurt's room, Kurt was squeezing Finn's hand in the middle of a contraction. "Wow," he said somehow dreamily. "I didn't thought I would feel any pain but I do. Wow." Kurt let go of Finn's hand and began to play with the teddybear he got from his boss.

"What's with him?" Burt grunted.

Finn looked up from his hurting hand and said, "They drugged him. He's totally high but everytime a contraction comes he tries to break my hand! Look!" He said to his mother when he noticed her behind Burt.

She came over to look at his hand while Burt walked to his son. He hasn't seen Kurt for a few months. He helped him move to New York and after that visited 3 times to see how he was doing or to repair something in the apartment. The last time Carole and he were in the city was for Christmas. Burt insisted, Kurt should stay in New York to not danger his or his baby's health. Rachel was in Lima celebrating with her fathers and allowed the married couple to sleep in her bed. Sadly, they only stayed one night because they needed to work shifts, Carole at the hospital and Burt was on breakdown service. No other holiday had so much profit as Christmas with all the accidents and Burt planned to save all the money he could for Kurt and his child.

They managed. All money that came in from the Anderson family was transferred to an extra account for the child's education and Burt would put extra 100$ in it, too. Then he send Finn and Kurt 300$ every month to support them. With Kurt, Finn and Rachel sharing the rent his kids should be able to live good for now. He was worried what would be when Kurt would live alone with his son. Can he earn enough money to live and raise a child? His boss looked nice, and she promised Kurt another promotion. He didn't even knew Kurt was promoted before. He asked Kurt how much he earns at his job but his son always gave vague answers. Finn told him he and Kurt would always pool their money together and that's the only reason Finn was able to buy a new jacket this winter.

When Kurt turned his head and saw his dad he grinned, dopey. "Hi daddy! Where is Carole?" He turned his head to Finn and saw Carole. "Hi Carole! Where is daddy?" Burt laughed and Kurt twisted his head back to him, looking like he saw him for the first time, today. "Hi daddy! Where is Ca-"

"Maybe you should come over here," Burt advised his wife.

When Carole stood next to Burt, Kurt smiled. "You came!"

"Of course we did," Carole said, brushing Kurt's bangs away and gave him a kiss on his forehead. "Finn, he is hot, bring him some ice cubes." Women and their ice cubes.

"Dad?" Kurt asked.

"Yes, son?"

"Can I do it?"

Burt bend down and hugged his son. "You can do anything you want."

"Good." Kurt yawned.

Then he doubled over, yelping, "OW OW OW OW!" His face a grimace of pain.

"How many minutes?" Carole asked Finn.

He looked at his watch. "About 3, I would say."

Carole sat to Kurt on the bed. "Kurt, darling. You are almost ready. Who do you want to be with you in the labor room?" She asked, gently trying to push him back against the bed.

When the pain began to fade and Kurt could breathe, again, he said, "Blaine!"

"He isn't here, son. Want me to come with you?" Burt asked.

Kurt shook his head. "There are things you don't need to see." He blushed, avoiding his dad's eyes.

"Y'know, I am your father, right? I was that guy who had to change your diapers," Burt laughed.

"It's not that," Kurt squeaked.

"Oh! Right, the tattoo," Rachel remembered.

Burt's eyes went wide as saucers, "Tattoo? You have a tatoo? When? Where? Is it washable?"

"I won't tell you." Kurt mumbled. "It's really small and doesn't matter."

"You scarred your body. I think it's a big thing," his father argued.

"It's not-"

The door knocked and the doctor came in.

"Wow, full house." Noticed Dr. Ted with a charming smile. "Is this your father?" He walked over to Burt and shook his hand. "Nice to meet you, sir." He turned to everyone else in the room, "Could you please wait outside while I look at Kurt?"

Everyone except for Finn, Burt and Carole exited the room. Dr. Ted began to examine Kurt for a last time. "Contractions?"

"Every 2 minutes," Finn said. Dr. Ted nodded.

"Okay. 10 centimeter. Won't get any better. Time to welcome your baby." The doctor called the nurses and they came immediately and prepared Kurt to bring him to the labor room. "Who of your guests will accompany us today?"

Kurt looked at his father, then Finn, Carole and the others who came back in to say their goodbyes. "No one," answered Kurt, weak.

"Pardon?" Dr. Ted looked confused.

"The person I want with me right now is not here. That's why I have to do it alone. I can't always count on everyone else. I have to do it alone."

"Kurt-" Burt began but Carole pulled his arm. Kurt made his decision.

"What's with the video?" Rachel wanted to know. "It's the big final, Kurt!"

Kurt waved her off, already whining in the pain.


They all were in the waiting room, Finn pacing the floor.

"Sit down, boy. We will wait a long time."

"How long?" Questioned Rachel. She looked through everything they recorded, already planning the cuts.

"First the head. That hurts like hell and takes a while, at least 20 minutes," explained Quinn. "Then you have a break. The baby turns, and you have to press out the shoulders, that feels actually like you're dying." She laughed at the memory.

"And then it's over?" Finn wanted to know, already green in the face.

"No-no, you still have to press out the placenta." Carole stated.

"Need to puke," Finn called, running to the restroom.


They were in the labor room. The nurses and the two doctors hurrying around him. They gave Kurt a new shot anagesics and he felt slightly better. "Your hips are so small, you'll need it," a nurse stated. He did his breathing, he had to, the pain became constant, the contraction pressed his inside out in steady waves that took his breath away. In a bad way.

His skin reddened and sweaty, his veins visible in exertion. He grabbed tight on the side of the bed, searchung for rest but couldn't find any since the pain never stopped anymore.

He felt Dr. Ted between his legs, he touched along his inner walls, touching something else, not him. He realized, that the man must be touching his son, that his son was already there, down there on his way out.

Kurt felt the doctor's rubber gloves sometimes sticking to his skin, nurses came around to look how far Kurt was. The other doctor always copied after what Doctor Ted did.

"Okay, Kurt. I want you to press as much you can at-" he began to count," 1! 2! 3! Now press!"

And Kurt pressed with his legs wide open. He pressed down to a point where he already felt his son's big head. He felt his bones shift out of their place, only held together by their muscle tendons, while something too big tried to ease out of him. He screamed, figuratively feeling his body bottom break when the stretch became even bigger. His muscles still tried to weakly squeeze around the blunt disturbance but were too stretched and gave in when Kurt continued to press.

He didn't stop, was afraid to stop, his body couldn't stop, the contraction forcing him to continue. He waited for Dr. Ted to tell him it was over, to tell him they were finished or that it wasn't too late for a C-section. What did he think? It's not normal, all these pains couldn't be normal. It felt like long minutes until the obstetrician finally told him to stop.

He fell back against the bed rest. One of the nurses dried his forehead and imitated the breathing technic to ground him.

"The head is out, Kurt. Next are the shoulders, then you will have a son! Now, collect yourself, this will hurt. Breathe, breathe, breathe." Doctor Ted patted his knee, doing God knows between his tighs.

Dr. Ted fumbled with tissues and other things, Kurt didn't know the name to, between his legs. He quietly talked with the other workers in the room while Kurt had to wait for the next expulsive pains.

Except for the extreme ache in his hips and legs, he felt numb, a bit dreamy to be honest. The people circled around him like on a carousel. He noticed a lot of blood and wondered if it was his own. Maybe they lied to him and he was dying. Will he die of blood lost? Will his hips ever feel normal again? He feels overstretched, and ripped apart. He looked at his huge belly and was thankfull that he couldn't see anything really thanks to it about what was happening down there.

"It's time, Kurt. Press in 1! 2! 3! Press! Push down! Squeeze! Concentrate! Try to relax your upper body and only press with the abdominal muscle!"

Kurt screamed again and then sobbed when something bigger than the baby's head tried to slowly slip out of him. It felt huge and it became gigantic, ripping his insides apart.

He cried for, "DADDY!"

And cursed, "God! Fuck! Satan! Holy Snickers!"

When it was worst, he pleaded for, "Blaine. Blaine. Blaine."

"There are the shoulders!" Cried his doctor in happiness. "Now, don't stop. Continue. It will be easier now!"

And even if his whole body was hurting and sore and every muscle felt hard like he did a 24 hours work out without any breaks, it became easier. He pressed his insides out until they pushed him back to the bed, again to rest and remember his breathing.

He felt weird, disoriented, something happened and he couldn't place it. He stared at the ceiling, the drugs making his surroundings obscure. One of the nurses stayed at his side, cooling his face and talking to him nonsense he didn't understand. He pressed her hand while trying to make his body feel normal again. Minutes went by and Kurt didn't realize it until he heard a baby's scream. He looked away from the ceiling to see his son for the first time.

He was beautiful. Skin red and wrinkled with white, red, slimy, grease at some body parts, eyes closed but lungs screaming loud enough to make Rachel Berry jealous. Kurt made grabby hands and the doctor laid him on Kurt's flat chest.

"My baby," he cooed. He gently touched his head, patting fascinated the few dark locks. Kurt took his little hands and counted the fingers, did the same with his feet. He smoothed over the small back.

They stayed like this for the next 10 minutes.

Then Kurt felt the pains return. It was like a lightning after feeling most only happiness. A nurse took over his son, took him to get examined.

The doctor went back down between his legs and he felt his touch. Kurt felt dirty, and slimy and he fellt something was not okay yet.

"Remember when I told you the traditional way is dangerous for men?" Dr. Ted asked him. Kurt nodded. "I think we meet this point now," he sighed. "Sedate him," he ordered the resident physician. A moment later Kurt was gone.


He woke up hours later in his hospital room. He felt weak and worn out. Kurt tried to move his arms but they felt too heavy, same was about his legs. He carefully moved his hand over to his belly. There was still alot of fat but a baby clearly missing between his organs.

"Finn?" He croaked into the darkness of his room. There was a rushed noise and then his big brother was by his side.

"Hey," whispered Finn. He switched on a little reading light to see him better while Kurt blinked against the bright disturbance. "You okay?"

"I don't know. Am I alive?" Kurt asked. He remembered holding his son, then there was a lot of pain again and then everything became white.

"Sure you are. Want a drink?" Kurt gave a shaky nod. Finn turned to his table. He put a straw into a water bottle and hold the straw to Kurt's lips. Kurt sipped a bit.

"Where is Lloyd?"

Finn grinned. "Nursling room. Kurt, he looks like a potato with Blaine's hair on. It's so cute!"

Kurt tried to smile. "Of course my child is cute."

"No! You don't understand he is like the cutest potato to exist!"

"You really dare to call my child a potato. I can't believe you."

"You should try to sleep some more." Finn told him smoothing over Kurt's oily hair.

"Y'ight," Kurt mumbled, eyes already dropping. "n't wait t'hold ma baby..."


Kurt woke up again at lunch time. "'ello?"

It was Finn again who was first at his side. Finn raised the back rest with a control module. Everyone from the day before was there again.

"Hi," he said when he saw his father. He was still sore and felt like his limps weight tons.

His dad came over and hugged him. "I am so happy you are okay now."

"What happened?" Kurt wanted to know.

In that moment the doctor came in. He explained to Kurt what happened. The placenta didn't expulse and he began to bleed a lot. That's why they sedated him to not cause any panic and did a curretage.

Male preggers normaly have to stay about 14 days in a hospital to ensure their hips and everything else goes back to normal but the doctor wants Kurt to stay there for about a whole month, being afraid Kurt will have enormous after pains and to look over his healing process.

Finally, a nurse came in and brought Kurt his son. Kurt's eyes lit up, seeing the little bundle that was his baby. Carole made sure Kurt was holding him right and then they all surrounded him to get a closer look.

Brody was already recording everything since Kurt woke up while Quinn and Rachel made a hundred of paparazzi photos. Isabelle was crying while his family was weirdly quiet.

"You alright?" He turned his face to his father.

"I still can't believe I am a grandpa now," Burt began to sobb. They all laughed.


Later, when Kurt was bottle feeding Lloyd, he remarked, "You know what I am dissappointed about? That I am not able to feed him. How weird is it that I can have a human in me for 9 months but not produce any milk?"

Rachel laughed. She was staying with him while Burt was out with Carole, Finn and Brody to make the apartment child safe.

Carole will stay until a day before valentine's day to go back to Lima together with Finn and Rachel for Mr. Schue's wedding.

His father would stay for at least a month. Ed, the oldest from his mechanic team would take over the shop for the whole time.

Quinn had to go back to school and Isabelle, too, remembered she had a work desk to be at right now.

She had his phone in hand, reading him the messages from their friends in Lima. It began an hour earlier, it looked like Ms. Pillsbury waited a day before she told everyone.

"Puck writes: 'On my way.' Gosh, he is really driving to New York?"

"Oh! Tina began to make little show outfits for him. Cute."

"Sugar is sending you a check. Okay..."

"Oh my god! Ms. Pillsbury send you a picture of herself in her wedding dress!"

"Hm. Mr. Schuester is not happy. 'You could have talked to me.'"

"Sure," muttered Kurt, rolling his eyes.


"Can I ask you something?" Rachel requested. Kurt said sure and she continued. "Yesterday, if you remember, I said I wanted to move out?"

Kurt gulped, looking sad. He and Rachel didn't really live long together but it was still nice to have her around. "I remember," he confirmed.

"Well, Finn wasn't happy and called me out on my selfish behaviour. Later I fought with Brody about it and your dad came in and talked us through. He told us to find a compromise and while we waited for you to come out of the labor room, Finn, Brody and I talked.

"I think we found a good compromise how I still can be a support for you and live with Brody. Now you only have to agree. We are all okay with what we came up, so it's up to you if you are okay, we'll too. What I am trying to say is and it's crazy that it was Brody's idea and not mine, can Brody move in with us?"

2/3/2016

It was a long movie. Cut down to a 3 hours version of parodic, bad reality TV.

There were scenes of the doctor, or one of Kurt's friends and family giving comments to what happened at a special moment and then there were all of Kurt's tears and crying for Blaine. Scenes of Kurt in a lot of pain or on some extreme painkillers.

There were a lot of scenes of Finn holding Kurt and calming him down. Kurt and Rachel even sang a song that was so perfect and it broke his heart. Kurt said often that he loved the father of his baby and he wondered if that stayed the same.

Sometimes Blaine wanted to kill Rachel in the movie for being so Rachel. He liked Brody a lot, he was calling Rachel out on her behaviour but still loved her. Everything became better when super dad aka. Burt Hummel entered the scene. All conflicts were mediated and the focus went back on Kurt.

Thank God no one recorded Kurt pressing out the the child.

But then the whole movie became a lot darker. Some doctor, not the Dr. Ted guy came in and told them that there were problems and Kurt was losing a lot of blood and they were trying their best. But they should prepare for the worst. All faces fell and the focus was gone and went to black.

Rachel Berry recorded herself at night, stating Kurt is over the worst and they wait for him to wake up, then she hurriedly turned around and showed Finn in Kurt's room, switching a lamp on and quietly talking to Kurt. When the light was switched off again you could hear a relieved sigh from the brunette girl.

At some point, Burt had the camera and filmed new born Lloyd, He talked to him in a baby voice and gave him weird nicknames. The nicest one was 'booger'.

Then in the movie it became day again and Kurt was awake. Their was a bonding moment of Burt and Kurt, then Dr. Tedds last appearance.

It followed many takes of Kurt holding his son, feeding him, talking to him, playing with his hands and feet, posing with Lloyd for the camera looking like a proud father.

The closing credits rolled down the screen, showing star shaped pictures of the people who were seen in the movie. A last full body picture of Rachel stating, edited by Rachel Berry. Then there was a black screen.

Blaine was about to turn away from the screen when there was motion again on the screen. Slowly blend in a black white record of Kurt with Lloyd in his arms, he sang Happy Birthday, Marilyn Monroe style. It was so beautiful, Blaine couldn't look away, even if he wanted to and then it was over.

He exhaled a shaky breath, hiding his face in his hands. Now it all felt more real. His fast heart beat made his hands and shoulders shake and when he looked up between his fingers Kurt was quietly watching him.

Blaine was about to say something when Finn interrupted, "I will give you two some privacy," and walked the few steps to the open kitchen connected with the livingroom. The big guy stared holes in Blaine's back head.

"Why?" Wanted Blaine to know, fully turning to Kurt. His eyes sadder than Kurt ever saw them before. "Why did you leave? I would have taken care of you!"

Kurt crossed his arms. "Don't do that, Blaine. I don't need your reproaches. If you really want to, I will tell you everything that happened when I learnt I was pregnant." He raised his hand to block Blaine's words out. "But you have to stay still and listen. And Finn," Kurt twisted his head to his brother, "You should go to bed. You have to get mom and dad from the airport early tomorrow."

Finn grumbled but walked past them to his/guest room. Kurt and Blaine adjusted themself on their seats, staying quiet for a few minutes.

When they heared the first of Finn's snores, they continued.

"Okay, now spill! Please tell me. I went through hell when you disappeared and now, years later, I have a son I didn't know about! I have a right to know everything." Blaine looked desperate and in pain. He sat back, eyes moving to he bed rooms, like he could see Lloyd from there. "Right?"

Kurt sighed, bracing himself for the long story. "I noticed something was wrong with me in my third week of pregnancy. You won't remember, but I had symptoms of a cold and went to the doctor to get a description for antibiothics."


Comments

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You're English is fine!! The fact that you learnt so much on your own is a testament to you! :) There are only a few errors that most second language English speakers have. If people can't read it that's their problem. Don't let anyone get you down. This is a great story and it is most definitely well written.

This chapter was awesome. I absolutely loved Finn in this and was so happy to see both him and Brody put Rachel in her place. I also really enjoyed when Burt arrived and made sure everything was in order and about his son. I felt so bad when Blaine realized all that he had missed and just wanted to understand why Kurt chose to leave him. I can't wait to see the rest of Kurt's story and to see how Blaine deals with what he hears. This story is definitely one of my new favorites.

Really wonderful chapter. Loved the way you potrayed Finn and Kurt. You are a fantastic writer and the story is just awesome!!! Eagerly awaiting another awesome chapter. Very curious.

i think your english is quite good considering that it's your second language. yes there are a few awkwardly worded phrases and some improper use of commas, but as a native english speaker, i can understand your story no problem. it sucks that no one is willing to beta your story, but don't worry–it is comprehensible. i am definitely intrigued by the story overall. i am really curious as to why kurt left blaine the way he did and also why finn and rachel are pissed at blaine. little lloyd frederick is going to be quite the prima donna as he gets older, won't he? looking forward to ch 4 :)