I was made to keep your body warm,
But I'm as cold as the wind blows,
So hold me in your arms.

My heart's against your chest,
Your lips pressed to my neck,
I've fallen for your eyes,
But they don't know me yet.

And with this feeling I forget,
I'm in love now.

Chapter 35:

"This is so depressing," Blaine said, staring out over the familiar field, the light of the moon slipping through the tall trees and highlighting some sections, but Kurt and Blaine were standing in the shade, just staring into nothingness. They had been standing there in silence for ten minutes, before Blaine had declared it depressing.

"I can't say I disagree," Kurt said, as Blaine dropped to sit down in the grass. Kurt sat down next to him, carefully, cringing a bit at the dirt he was about to sit in, but he sat anyway because tomorrow, he was leaving and he wasn't going to let his fear of getting a little dirty ruin their final night together.

Blaine sighed and inched closer, then leaned in and laid his head on Kurt's shoulder. "Can we just stay here like this forever?"

Kurt chuckled. "What would we do if it rained? And what about skincare?"

Blaine smiled and nudged Kurt playfully. "Seriously, though," Blaine said, still smiling. "Couldn't I like, buy a shed and set it down here and just live here for the rest of forever?"

"The rest of forever seems like an awfully long time," Kurt told him.

"Unfortunately," Blaine sighed again.

"There's still that idea we talked about last night," Kurt pointed out.

Blaine caught his bottom lip between his teeth and said nothing. What they had discussed the previous night was Blaine coming to New York with Kurt, but Blaine didn't see how that was going to work out. He guessed he could have gone, but that would mean going out there straight away, because if he waited a long time before joining Kurt, chances were Kurt would already be caught up in the wonder and awe of the big city. Maybe he would even find someone else, someone more interesting, more attractive and with more talent than Blaine. If he was going to go to New York, he would have to leave with Kurt, tomorrow, but he couldn't do that.

"Why not?" Kurt had asked and Blaine hadn't been able to give him a straight answer. He didn't know what it was that was keeping him there, or maybe he did, he just had trouble admitting it. As much as he disliked his parents and the situation they had put him in, he felt like he couldn't just leave them without trying again. Maybe he could talk to his mom, help her understand.

But he couldn't bring himself to do that yet. However, he couldn't leave until he knew he had tried and by the time he did that, Kurt would be settled in and probably wouldn't even want him there any more. Besides, New York seemed very surreal to him. He couldn't imagine himself out there, amongst the glamour and the big city lights. He needed to get his head around everything before he could make any drastic decisions, which was why he had to decline Kurt's proposal that he go with him.

"I guess I can't expect you to come all the way out there for me," Kurt said, obviously sensing Blaine's discomfort.

"It's not that," Blaine said, quickly. "If you asked me to go out there with you, I'd go, no questions asked." It was true, if Kurt really wanted him there, he would go. Maybe he wouldn't be entirely comfortable with it, but if that was what Kurt wanted, he would do it.

It occurred to Blaine then that maybe he needed that, too, for Kurt to ask him to go with him, to beg him to go, to tell him that he couldn't possibly go anywhere without him and that he absolutely had to have him with him forever. Which was unfair, because Blaine knew Kurt loved him and Kurt couldn't know what Blaine wanted unless he told him. Blaine didn't even really know what he wanted himself. He wanted Kurt to stay with him, but he would never let him, because this was Kurt's dream and he wanted Kurt to go out and live it. He wanted to be with Kurt, but he couldn't see a way to make that happen that didn't make him feel as if he would be making the wrong decision, for whatever reason.

"I don't think you want me to ask that of you," Kurt said, softly, shifting a bit and Blaine sat up so that he could look into those ocean blue eyes. "I know you have your reasons, so I won't ask you to do anything you're not comfortable with, but.." Kurt paused for a moment and Blaine waited for him to go on. "Tell me the reason you don't want to go isn't because you don't love me, or want to be with me."

"Are you crazy?" Blaine asked, incredulously. "That couldn't be further from the truth. I always want to be with you. I just—I don't really know what it is, I just—I can't leave yet. Unless you want it."

"I'm not about to make you leave when something is telling you you need to stay, but—"

"No," Blaine said, before Kurt could finish that sentence. "I know what you're going to say and if I don't go with you now, I never will, because once you're out there, everything will have changed and I won't be enough and—"

"You won't be enough?" Kurt asked, eyes wide. "Blaine," Kurt breathed and then he was pushing Blaine backwards, until he was flat on his back with Kurt sitting next to him, but leaning across him, his hands on either side of his arms. Blaine's heart had begun to thump faster in his chest and he looked up at Kurt, shadows cast all across his body from the moon and the trees and the stars and he felt his heart aching, because how was he supposed to just let this boy walk out of his life without a fight? "I know you think that going out there is going to turn me into some stranger, but it won't. I'll still be me, the same guy who fell in love with you, even when you were hurting me. If I could love you then, I can love you no matter what."

Blaine just took slow, even breaths, eyes locked on Kurt.

"And I know that you're not convinced now," Kurt went on, moving a hand to rest against Blaine's left cheek. His touch sent small shivers all down Blaine's spine. That feeling never got old. "But maybe at some point that'll register and you'll be able to do something about it."

"You should kiss me now," Blaine uttered.

Kurt smiled and it made Blaine's heart still in his chest for a split second. "I should," he said, then he lowered himself down, the palm of his hand still pressed to Blaine's cheek, then his mouth was about an inch away from Blaine's and he stopped.

"What are—"

"Shh," Kurt whispered, then he smiled and pressed his lips to Blaine's.

Blaine reached up to pull him closer, to deepen the kiss, to drink him in and hold on to him and just have him there, close to him, flush against him, like no one else ever had been, but Kurt just tilted his head back and looked down at Blaine, with those bright, glistening eyes and shook his head.

Blaine opened his mouth to speak, but Kurt spoke first, "If you go too fast, it'll all be over too quickly and I never want it to be over."

Blaine wondered if he was talking about sex, but he had a feeling he wasn't. He didn't say anything, just nodded and then Kurt's lips were on his again. Blaine closed his eyes and slipped his arms around Kurt's waist, then pulled him down, gently, not rushing, just needing to have him close. Kurt hummed against his lips and Blaine slipped his hands under Kurt's jacket, then under the soft material of his shirt and pressed the tips of his cool fingers to the small of Kurt's smooth back. He felt Kurt gasp a little against his lips, but then he settled back into the slow, contrived kiss as Blaine's finger tips placed tiny kisses all along the soft skin of his lower back.

Blaine shuddered when Kurt's cold hands slipped under his shirt and pressed against his stomach.

"Sorry," Kurt whispered very quietly against Blaine's lips.

"Don't apologise," Blaine smiled up at him and Kurt blinked a couple of times, slowly, his lashes thick and dark in the dim light. Blaine raised his head a bit, beckoning Kurt's lips to his own. Kurt pressed his lips back down over Blaine's and slipped his tongue past his teeth.

Blaine felt Kurt's lips tilting into a smile against his own and his fingers were moving upwards, over his ribs and then higher. Blaine hummed when Kurt's thumb flicked over his right nipple and then his hands were lingering at the sides of his ribcage and Blaine squeaked a bit. Kurt tore his lips away and grinned.

"I forgot you were ticklish," he told him and he moved his fingers again. Blaine jerked away, trying to stifle his laughter.

"You did that on purpose!" Blaine accused, covering his stomach with his arms.

Kurt laughed out loud then pushed Blaine back down. Blaine tried to protest, still shielding his body, but Kurt just shook his head and his wide grin faded to a smile. Kurt caught Blaine's eyes and Blaine knew then that the joke was over and Kurt wanted to go back to them just being close to one another. Blaine nodded very slightly and then Kurt was sliding his hands under his shirt again, but this time, they slipped under him, to press against his lower back. Blaine took Kurt's chin gently in his hand and pulled him down for another kiss, slipping his other hand back to where it had been before, on the small of Kurt's back.

Kurt kissed him back and Blaine was dizzy. Kurt's mouth moving against his own, that familiar smell, his light touch, all sent him reeling, his heart hammering away inside his chest. Kurt moved his mouth then and began to kiss his way down Blaine's jaw, only stopping when he reached the side of his neck, near his pulse. Blaine tilted his head to give him more space and then he felt Kurt's warm tongue on him. He began to place, short, open-mouthed kisses to his neck and Blaine moaned.

"You okay?" Kurt whispered, taking his mouth off of Blaine to speak.

"Will you.."

"Anything you want," Kurt told him.

Blaine felt his skin flushing when he said it, "Mark me?"

Kurt leaned back to look at him, his eyes soft, but still wild-looking. "If you want," he told Blaine.

"I want," he permitted. "I want to have it there for after you're gone."

"Okay," Kurt nodded, then bent his head again, his lips finding Blaine's pulse. Kurt kissed him there a few times, then his teeth were nibbling very gently on his skin and Blaine flung his head back, baring his neck completely for Kurt.

"Please," Blaine whispered and Kurt placed a final butterfly kiss to his neck, before burying his head there. It was a strange thing, to have someone sucking on your neck, but Kurt felt amazing. His hot mouth was locked on his soft skin and Blaine just wanted this forever, wanted Kurt to just mark him all over and claim him as his own so that everyone knew.

After a long time, Kurt raised his head and Blaine opened his eyes and Kurt was smiling down at him, his blue eyes a shade darker than they had been before.

"You're beautiful," Kurt told him, which was new, because usually it was Blaine telling Kurt he was beautiful. Blaine smiled and felt a lump forming in his throat, not for the first time that day. "Are you going to cry?" Kurt asked, reaching up to push a stray curl back from Blaine's forehead.

"No," Blaine told him, with a smile, but he wasn't sure that was true.

Kurt dropped down and pressed a light kiss to Blaine's forehead, then pulled back again and looked at him. "Let me see the damage," he chuckled and tilted Blaine's chin with his fingers. "Hmm," Kurt grinned. "Not bad for a first timer."

"Do you remember the first time we did it here?"

Kurt spluttered. "Yes," he said, wrinkling his nose. "I just remember thinking it was so—dirty."

"Oh, admit it, you loved it," Blaine smirked. "Every. Single. Time."

"Never said I didn't," Kurt said, dropping his hand to Blaine's shoulder.

"Thought not," Blaine smiled. "That was one of the greatest nights of my life."

"Yeah, you said so the night of your birthday party," Kurt informed him.

"I did?" Kurt nodded. Blaine shrugged. "I meant it. It was. All of the best nights were with you. And the best days, too."

"Same for me," Kurt told him.

"Not for long," Blaine said, smile fading. "Pretty soon your best memories will be memories of things you do in New York." He saw Kurt frowning. "I don't mean to sound bitter about that. Sorry."

"It's fine," Kurt shook his head and entwined his arms around Blaine's neck. "But seriously, Blaine, regardless of what happens in my life, this—us— will always be special to me. I love you, remember? That doesn't just go away over night."

Blaine nodded and sighed. He reached up and pulled Kurt down for another kiss. They kissed, slowly and for a long time, until they had to come up for air. Blaine's head was misty and his heart felt huge in his chest. All he wanted to do was reach up and pull Kurt down to him, clasp him in a tight embrace and never let go.

Blaine did reach up and pull Kurt down, he held him close and wrapped him up in his arms and they stayed there talking quietly for a long time, but in the end, Blaine still had to let go.

They climbed to their feet and Kurt reached across for Blaine's hand.

"I'm going to miss this place," Kurt said, looking out over the darkness.

"I'm not going to come back here without you," Blaine decided.

"What?" Kurt asked, turning to look at him. "Why not? You used to come here without me before."

"Yeah," Blaine shrugged one shoulder. "But you don't miss something you never had and now that I've had you and that I've spent so much time with you here, I can never go back to not knowing what it's like to have you here with me, you know?"

Kurt stared at him with those bright blue eyes for a couple of heart beats, then he nodded. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I get it."

"You know what we should do?"

"What?"

Blaine grinned and began tugging Kurt towards the dark trees.

"Oh, no," Kurt said, stopping still. "There is no way you're getting me in there. There is bound to be wild animals and bugs and—and filth and—"

"Come on, Kurt!" Blaine smiled, tugging lightly on Kurt's hand. "Trust me."

Kurt sighed. "Fine," he said. "I must really love you a whole lot."

"You do," Blaine grinned and lead Kurt into the darkness. He stopped by a tall oak tree and reached inside his pocket for his phone. "Hold this," he said, handing the phone to Kurt, the soft glow of the phone a little shocking to his eyes. Kurt held up the phone as Blaine produced a key from his pocket.

"What are you—oh," Kurt said, watching as Blaine leaned into the tree and started to carve into the thick bark. "This is vandalism."

"Live a little," Blaine smiled, glancing across at Kurt. He dragged the sharp end of the key down making the letter 'B'. He continued to carve into the wood until he was done. He stood back to admire his handy work, his eyes roving over the crooked letters inside the crooked heart shape in the light of the phone.

Blaine
and
Kurt

"You're a cheesy, little romantic," Kurt smiled, grabbing Blaine's hand again.

"Oh, the 'little' jokes never get old, Hummel," Blaine grinned, slipping the key back in is pocket. "How long do you think this will be here?"

"Hopefully forever," Kurt said, a little dreamily.

Blaine frowned a bit then, because maybe the carving would be there forever, but they wouldn't last forever. They stood there staring at it for another while, then Kurt gave Blaine's hand a light squeeze.

"We should get home," he said.

"I guess," Blaine nodded. "Kiss me one more time in our field. Just once more."

Kurt smiled and moved to stand in front of Blaine, then he tugged him forward and crushed their mouths together and this time, the kiss was anything but slow and careful. Instead, it was frantic, needy, filled with yearning and passion and want and Blaine just needed to take Kurt home and make the most of their final night together.

"I love you," Kurt breathed, once they had torn their mouths apart.

"And I love you," Blaine replied, his fingers clasped with Kurt's. "I love you so much it hurts."

And it was true, it really and truly did hurt.

"Blaine," Kurt shook his head. "That is a terrible show, we are not watching that." Kurt made a grab for the TV remote, but Blaine held it away from him.

"I happen to like this show," Blaine quipped back, holding the remote up in the air, even though Kurt was taller than him and could easily have reached it if he really wanted to.

"That's because your taste is in your ass," Kurt told him.

"Does that include my taste in men?"

Kurt glared at him. "No," he said, finally. "Your taste in men is flawless, but your taste in television is tragic."

"God, fine," Blaine smiled and dropped the remote down into Kurt's lap, before flinging himself back on the couch, his body leaning on Kurt's side. "Why are we even watching TV when we could go downstairs and—"

"Hi, dad," Kurt said, loudly over Blaine, because Blaine couldn't see the door from the angle he was sitting in. Burt walked in the door, holding a mug.

"Oh, hey, guys," Burt said and Blaine pushed himself up. "Didn't know you were home. I was just gonna.." Burt gestured towards the TV. "But watch whatever you were watching, I can go—"

"Actually, dad, we weren't watching anything, just browsing," Kurt told him, then he elbowed Blaine. "We'll go to my room and leave you to watch.. whatever you were about to watch."

Burt raised an eyebrow, looking from Kurt to Blaine, then back to Kurt.

"Dad," Kurt groaned. "We're just going to hang out, okay? This is my last night here, can't I at least spend time with the guy I love without you thinking we're going to—to do that?"

Burt gave a Gallic shrug. "I didn't say a word."

Blaine spluttered a bit and Kurt gave him a sideways scowl. "What?" Blaine asked. "He's right, he didn't say anything!"

"Whose side are you on?"

"There are no sides, Kurt," Burt chuckled and sat down in his arm chair. "Now go downstairs, unless you want to stay and watch football."

Kurt turned around instantly and gave Blaine a gentle push towards the stairs to his room. Blaine tried to protest, but Kurt rolled his eyes and grabbed his arm, then tugged him down the stairs after him. Once inside, Kurt shut the door.

"Do you think he'll come check on us?" Blaine asked.

"He hasn't come down the past two nights, has he?"

"No," Blaine concluded. "So.."

"What?" Kurt smirked.

"Nothing."

"Would that nothing have anything to do with farewell sex?" Kurt enquired.

"Farewell sex," Blaine scoffed. "You're something else, do you know that?"

"I am aware," Kurt smiled and went closer. He saw Blaine swallow hard when he reached out and tugged him forward by the round neck of his t-shirt. Blaine allowed Kurt to push him down onto the bed, his hands trailing down his body until they rested on either side of his hips. "I'm just going to take your clothes off, okay? It'll save time."

"Yeah, whatever you want," Blaine breathed. "Wh-what about yours?"

Kurt raised a thin brow, then stood back. In one swift movement, his shirt was over his head and he threw it across the room. It landed on a chair. Blaine's mouth hung open as Kurt shrugged out of his pants, then slid his briefs off.

"Y-you just—"

"Your turn," Kurt smiled, mischievously.

Blaine cried out as Kurt's hand moved back and forth on his erection, almost frantically. He wasn't going to last if Kurt continued to do this to him and he wanted to last. He wanted this night to last forever, because after this it was all over.

"Kurt," he exhaled. "Please, Kurt. I—I can't—"

"What do you want?" Kurt asked, his blue eyes wild and bright.

Blaine couldn't think, his mind was clouded and the world was a blur. "Um," he paused. "Will-will you top?"

Kurt raised an eyebrow again. It had been a long time since Kurt had topped. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," Blaine nodded. "I want to feel you for the next few days and I want you to be able to walk tomorrow, so yeah, definitely sure."

"It.. It's been a while," Kurt said, catching his bottom lip between his teeth. "Are you sure?" he asked again.

"Unless you don't want to."

"I want to."

"Good," Blaine said and he pushed himself up and reached over to grab the small tube of lube Kurt kept in his side drawer. "Here you go, pretty boy, work your magic."

"My magic," Kurt chuckled as he popped the cap open. He squeezed a blob onto his fingers, rubbed them together, then bent forward, his hand trailing down to find Blaine's opening. "Stop squirming," he said, once he had pressed a cool finger to his body.

After a few minutes of simply flicking his fingers across Blaine's entrance, Kurt slipped a finger inside, slowly. Blaine winced at the intrusion, but insisted Kurt keep going, so he did.

"Kurt," Blaine managed after a while. "Kurt, if you don't st-stop I won't—I can't, Kurt—"

"Okay," Kurt said, slowing his fingers. "Okay, relax."

Blaine groaned in frustration as Kurt removed his fingers completely. Kurt shushed him as he got himself ready. He moved up onto his knees and angled Blaine's legs around him.

"I bet you wish you hadn't insisted on topping all those times now," Kurt smirked, placing a hand on Blaine's thigh.

"No," Blaine said, opening his golden eyes all the way to look up at Kurt. "N-no regrets," he told him, breathing shaky. "Everything's worth it with you," he uttered. "Always worth it."

"I can stop," Kurt looked down a t him as he winced beneath him. "If you need me to."

"Don't," Blaine said, quickly. "Don't you dare, Kurt Hummel, or—or I'll—"

"You'll what?" Kurt grinned, quickening his thrusts. "What are you going to do, Blaine?"

Blaine swallowed and closed his eyes, Kurt still smiling at him. He caught his bottom lip between his teeth in order to stop the whine from escaping his lips.

"Lie back and take it," Blaine replied, finally, his body pulsing with pain and pleasure and dizziness.

"Good," Kurt hummed and moved his hips forward in a rhythm, pushing in and out of Blaine, quickly, his hands on either side of Blaine's body.

After that, Blaine couldn't form coherent words, he simply lay there and met Kurt's thrusts with his own, their bodies moving together in a steady rhythm. Blaine's heart was hammering away inside his chest, so hard that he thought it might burst from its confines and all he wanted to do was pull Kurt to him and grip on to him forever.

As if he could read Blaine's mind, Kurt pulled Blaine into his arms, slowing his thrusts for a moment, but not stopping. He bent so that they were wrapped around each other, their chests pressed together, hearts beating fast. Blaine moaned a little, his emotions whirling. He couldn't tell if the small sobs escaping his lips were because of the sensation of Kurt slipping in and out of him, or because of everything he was feeling, what with Kurt leaving and the way his life was going. He thought it might have been a combination of everything.

He whimpered when Kurt reached down and took his throbbing erection in his hand and began to match the thrusts of his hand with the thrusts of his hips and Blaine's eyes rolled back in his head and he couldn't any more, couldn't stop the loud cries from slipping out of his mouth. Kurt smiled a little and bent to catch Blaine's lips with his own, probably to stifle the sounds, because after all, his dad was upstairs.

But Blaine was lost and he needed to just let himself go. He tore his mouth off Kurt's and Kurt tried to quieten him down. He pressed his mouth against Blaine's again, but Blaine only sucked Kurt's bottom lip into his mouth. Kurt chuckled a little, then his smile faded as he came closer and closer and Blaine knew he would come soon, he could see it in his half-lidded blue eyes. His thrusts were coming faster now and his hand was moving quickly and Blaine felt light headed as he came hard and fast under Kurt's touch. He didn't have time to compose himself, because then Kurt's hips were stuttering forward and he was coming, too, inside Blaine and they both moaned as Kurt collapsed on top of him.

They stayed like that, just breathing for a long time, then Kurt twisted his neck, so that his bright, cyan eyes were in line with Blaine's hazel ones.

"Are you okay?" Kurt whispered.

"I'm going to love you every day for the rest of my life."

Their hands were clasped together as they lay there in the dark, slivers of light slipping through the small, rectangular windows at the top of the left wall.

"I'm going to call you every day, you know," Kurt told him.

"I won't pick up."

"Rude," Kurt said and Blaine could hear him smiling. "Why not?"

"Because it's easier that way," Blaine told him.

"No, it's not," Kurt said. "How is not talking to one another easier?"

"It just is," Blaine told him. "I can't imagine hearing from you every day and not getting to be with you."

"Well, I can't imagine not hearing from you every day," Kurt shot back.

"Fair point," Blaine said, quietly. "I still won't pick up, though."

"What if I really, really need to talk to you?"

"Then you text me beforehand telling me of your dire need to converse with me," Blaine smiled. "And then and only then will I pick up when you call."

"So, what's your plan?" Kurt asked, twisting his fingers in Blaine's hand. "After I leave you're just going to act like I never existed?"

"Don't be ridiculous."

"I don't think I'm being ridiculous," Kurt told him. "I mean, I understand why you think it's a bad idea for us to go on talking and stuff, because it will be hard, but are you going to just act like we never happened?"

Blaine rolled his eyes. "I'm going to have nothing but you on my mind for every second of the foreseeable future," Blaine said. "So, no, I'm not going to just at like we never happened."

"Okay."

Silence.

"I'm sorry," Blaine said, dropping on to his side, to face Kurt. "I'm not mad, or anything. I'm just scared of everything. I don't know what to do."

"It's okay, babe," Kurt said, turning to face him, too. He pushed himself up close, so that his arms were around is waist. "I'm scared, too."

"Don't be," Blaine smiled. "Everything will be fine. You'll love it out there. It's what you were born to do."

"What about you?" Kurt asked, quietly. "What are you going to do? What were you born to do?"

"I," Blaine smiled, looping his arms around Kurt's neck. "Was born to love you."

Kurt chuckled and pressed a butterfly kiss to his lips. Blaine smiled and breathed him in, because this was it for real, this was the final night and he couldn't bring himself to ruin it with the threatening tears prickling at his eyes, he couldn't bring himself to make this a horrible night, filled with sadness and moping around. He needed to make this night good, memorable, perfect.

"Promise me you'll call me if you need to," Kurt said. "I mean it, Blaine, if you need me, you pick up a phone and call me. If my dad tells me that—"

"I'll call you if I need you," Blaine assured him. "Happy?"

"Ecstatic," Kurt said, flatly. "Did you mean it?"

"Mean what?"

"When you said you'd love me every day for the rest of your life," Kurt provided. "Did you mean that?"

"Absolutely," Blaine said, not missing a beat.

"I'll love y—"

"Don't tell me that," Blaine said. "I can't hear that and then watch you go. It's selfish and unfair of me not to let you say it, but I'm sorry, I just can't hear it."

"Tough," Kurt said, tightening his grip on Blaine's waist. "I'll never not love you. No matter what."

"Okay," Blaine exhaled. "You should sleep now."

"I don't want to," Kurt said, but he yawned, then.

"Yes, you do," Blaine smiled. "Come on, sleep. I'll still be here in the morning."

"Promise?"

"What, that I'll still be here in the morning?"

"No," Kurt said. "That you'll never stop loving me."

"Oh," Blaine said. "Yeah, I promise. I swear it on anything."

"Good," Kurt said and he yawned again. "I love you, Blaine."

"I love you, too," Blaine told him, placing a small kiss to the tip of Kurt's nose. "I love you."

Then Kurt moved in and laid his head in that space between Blaine's neck and shoulder and Blaine held him closer and they fell asleep like that, listening to one another's breathing and the sound of their hearts beating, just holding on to each other, for the very, very last time.

"Yes, dad, I have everything," Kurt smiled, rolling his eyes a bit. He looked across at Carole and Finn sitting on the couch. Finn was watching the TV, while Carole smiled and looked teary-eyed.

"I can't believe you boys are going to college all ready," she said. Finn was going to New York, too, with Rachel, so he and Kurt were going together, because their parents were dating. Rachel was going with her dads.

"Time flies," Burt smiled, sitting down next to Carole. "You guys had better get going."

"Yeah," Finn said, standing up. "I'll put your things in the car, okay, dude?" he said, looking at Kurt.

"Thanks, Finn," Kurt smiled, then looked at his dad. "I'm just going to go talk to Blaine for a minute, okay?"

"Sure thing, kiddo," Burt smiled, back and Kurt turned around and headed downstairs, where Blaine was in his room, making sure he wasn't forgetting anything.

He pushed the door open and saw Blaine sitting on the bed, staring at his hands in his lap.

"You okay?"

Blaine looked up quickly. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, fine."

"We've gotta get going in a few," he told Blaine.

"I know," Blaine said, then patted the bed next to him. Kurt went and sat down. "I'm going to miss you like you wouldn't even believe," he told Kurt. "Seriously."

"I'm going to miss you, too," Kurt nodded. "I'm going to miss you every second of every day."

Blaine sighed and moved forward for a kiss. Kurt kissed him back, entwining his arms around his neck as Blaine's arms encircled his waist. Blaine murmured against his lips and Kurt deepened the kiss, not worrying about going slow and making it last any more. He needed to be as close to Blaine as possible, to hold him so close that one body couldn't be deciphered from the other.

Eventually, the broke away for air. "I owe you everything, you know that, don't you?" Blaine smiled up at him, his voice breaking a bit. His eyes were glistening and Kurt knew he was trying his best not to cry. "You saved me from myself. You made me see that everything I thought I was was a lie, that everything about my life was fake and ridiculous. You made me fall in love with you and you made me a better person."

"You would have gotten there by yourself," Kurt smiled. "You know, eventually."

"Yeah, when it was too late," Blaine said. "I just want you to know how much that means to me—how much you mean to me."

Kurt nodded, smiling, unable to stop the tears from trickling out of his eyes and down his face.

"I don't want you to worry about me out there," Blaine went on. "I mean, I know you can't help worrying, but I just want you to concentrate on you. I'll be okay, I will."

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked, sounding choked. "Because if you're not—"

"I'm sure," Blaine nodded. "I'll find myself. I'll be okay."

"Good," Kurt said, exhaling. "I want you to be okay."

"Guess this is it," Blaine uttered. "You'd better get going."

"Will you come upstairs?"

Blaine looked unsure. "I don't—"

"Please, Blaine?" Kurt pleaded. "I want yours to be the last face I see before I leave this damned place."

"Okay," Blaine nodded.

Kurt reached down and took Blaine's wrist in his hands. He lifted it up and pushed back his sleeve, revealing the bracelet. He held his own wrist up, too. "What about these?"

"I'll never take mine off," Blaine said. "If you want to, that's okay, I'll unders—"

"Never taking it off," Kurt ensured him. "Not ever."

Blaine smiled and it made Kurt's heart contract a bit. He saw a single tear slip out of Blaine's eye then. "I said I wouldn't do this," Blaine uttered, wiping at his eyes.

"It's okay if you do," Kurt said. "I won't mind."

"I don't want you to feel bad about going."

"I'll feel bad whether you cry or not."

"Are you nervous?" Blaine smiled, grabbing Kurt's hand.

"Really nervous," Kurt answered.

"Don't be," Blaine grinned. "You're going to be amazing. This is the beginning. You're going to make it huge."

"I'll try my best," Kurt smiled, tears still falling.

Blaine reached up and caught them with his thumb. "I have faith in you," he told him. "You're amazing."

"So are you," Kurt replied. "You'll call me if you need me, right?"

"I said I would."

"Just making sure," Kurt said.

"This is it," Blaine said, then. "This is goodbye, for real."

"Blaine—"

Kurt didn't get to finish his sentence, because Blaine was kissing him again, gently this time, his mouth moving slowly, taking Kurt's breath away, making his heart race in his chest, wildly, his body quivering a little. He pulled back then and Blaine's face was tear stained and they didn't say another word. Blaine gave him a small nod, then stood up and outstretched a hand to him.

Kurt took it and they went upstairs.

"Promise me you'll watch him," Kurt whispered in Burt's ear while he hugged him goodbye.

"You know I will," Burt whispered back.

They broke apart and Kurt sniffed a bit, wiping away his tears.

"You call me when you get there," Burt said, giving Kurt a pat on the back.

"I will, dad," Kurt told him.

"You, too, Finn," Carole said to Finn, who was standing by the door.

"I'll make sure he does," Kurt assured her, then he turned to look at Blaine. He smiled. "Come here, you," Kurt said and he went closer to him.

Blaine wasn't really smiling, nor was he really frowning, he just looked sort of neutral standing there. Kurt pulled him into a hug and he heard Blaine sighing against his body. He stopped trying not to cry then and just let the tears flow freely. He thought Blaine might be crying, too, because he was shaking a little in his arms.

"We'll never really be through, you know that, don't you?" Kurt asked, quietly.

"I like to think that's true," Blaine answered, tightening his grip on Kurt, like he didn't want to let go.

"It is true," Kurt told him.

"I love you, pretty boy," Blaine whispered, very quietly into his ear.

"I love you, too," Kurt whispered back. "I always will."

"Me, too," Blaine said. "You have to let me go, Kurt."

"I can't."

"You have to," Blaine said. "Let go, baby."

Kurt sobbed in his arms as Blaine pulled gently away. "Go on, get out of here," he said, smiling, but Kurt could tell he was just trying not to break. He held onto his hand for another few moments.

"Don't forget," Blaine said, quietly.

"Never," Kurt told him, his heart twisting in his chest.

Then he let go.

Blaine watched as the car pulled out of the driveway, Kurt's bright blue eyes, watery and glistening, still staring at him as it went. Blaine stood next to Burt and Carole and watched Kurt go, watched as the car got smaller and smaller and the boy with the bright blue eyes that meant more to him than anything else in the world, got farther and farther away. The car disappeared into the distance and so did the boy, and it wasn't until Blaine went back to Kurt's room and buried his head in the pillows, breathing in his scent, his heart aching painfully in his chest, that he allowed himself to really and truly cry, because he would never get to hold him ever again and nothing else in the whole entire world could have hurt more.

That was it, now. He had nothing left.

Blaine was completely and utterly alone.