PERFECT PORCELAIN
The Kurt Hummel Scoop

When one dresses to meet Kurt Hummel, one takes care to make sure everything is perfect. And I did exactly that, agonising over my outfit choice for hours, and spending a good fifteen minutes before our meeting fiddling with one particularly pesky strand of hair.

Kurt, however, appears to take the opposite approach. When I glanced rather obviously at his still stylish, but admittedly somewhat more relaxed apparel, he laughed good-naturedly.

“When you make your living wearing clothes worth more than your life, it's nice to dress down a bit on your off-days,” he explained with a  smile. “I mean, I was pretty fashion-obsessed in high school, but I've kind of toned it down a bit from back then.”

For those of you who don't know – and, if that's the case, where on earth have you been these past three years? – Kurt was scouted into the model industry back in his sophomore year of high school. His elfin features and floorless skin soon earned him a place as the face of Alexander McQueen's latest menswear line and the now infamous nickname of ‘Porcelain.'

“It all feels like such a long time ago now,” Kurt told me with a shrug. “I met Theresa – she's the woman who scouted me – when  I was still running on an adrenaline high. I'd just completed the cheerleading routine that won my squad nationals and was in the process of being passed around for hugs and getting dragged in front of a news camera by my coach, and then suddenly, this woman in the most gorgeous pantsuit comes up to me and hands me her business card.”

The William McKinley High Cheerios were at the time the undoubtable top dogs of the high school cheerleading circuit. Kurt's national victory marked their sixth consecutive win, but, Kurt's quick to assure, it wasn't all fun and games.

“It was very, very hard work,” Kurt admitted. “I was the squad's vocalist, so on top of learning all the choreography and keeping in time, I had to make sure I was hitting all the right notes. I was also new to cheerleading that year, so it was a very steep learning curve. That experience, of being so out of my depth, really helped with the transition to modelling, I suppose.”

After I told Kurt he looked cute in his old uniform, his eyes went wide.

“Oh God,” he said. “Please, please tell me you don't have a photo of that.”

Unfortunately for Kurt, we do.

Once he had successfully contained his horror and I had stopped laughing at his horrified expression, Kurt continued the story.

“I actually wasn't going to call Theresa at first. I, like many other teenagers, wasn't exactly the most comfortable with everything I was. It was flattering, sure, that someone out there thought I had the potential to be a model of all things, but I was obsessed with the idea that it had to be a mistake. When I did eventually drop Theresa a line, I was actually pretty surprised that she remembered my name and face. I was even more shocked when, three weeks later, I discovered that this ‘small-time model job' she had lined up for me was in fact becoming the face of Alexander McQueen's new line.”

When the conversation turned to family, Kurt's face took on a softer quality. Kurt grew up in Lima, a medium sized town in Ohio with a pretty strong conservative base. As an openly gay teenager, Kurt's often remarked on the difficulties he faced in his childhood in terms of homophobia and bullying. His father, however, couldn't be more accepting.

“My dad is – well, he's just amazing,” Kurt said. “I know better than anyone else that it was hard for him to raise me, but he's always supported me. I am so, so lucky to have him for a father and I love him so, so much.”

Next up, we talked rivals in the business. Rumour has it, Kurt's soon going to be working with another famous young model – the gorgeous Blaine Anderson – but Kurt would neither confirm nor deny the rumours. Kurt also refused to comment on the more recent hype surrounding his supposed rocky relationship with the older model, Sebastian Smythe – a conflict which allegedly culminated with Kurt walking out of a shoot and refusing to work on the same set as Smythe.

In terms of future projects, though, Kurt did offer a secretive smile. “There's one in particular that I'm looking forward to, but that's all I'm going to say.”

[VIDEO]
The GAP ATTACK!

Remember this one, guys?

I remember when this first showed on TV. I almost died laughing.

This was my favourite commercial all through school.

Oh, Blainers, no matter what you do, with fashion and perfume ads, to me, you will always be the guy who serenaded his sweetheart in GAP.

The guy behind this ad was either completely off his rocker or a genius.

I can't help but feel it was a volatile mixture of the two.

“Blaine is definitely very good looking, I'll give him that.”
-Kurt Hummel

“Kurt and I have a lot in common and it's great to have someone to relate to in this business.”
-Blaine Anderson

Three words: I. Ship. It.

Yes yes yes YES YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD, YOU ARE A GENIUS!

^^^ Why didn't I think of this???

Do we have a pairing name? I'm kinda rooting for Blurt.

I'm tending more towards Klaine, guys.

I think everyone here is missing something. Blaine's not gay, remember?

SHHHHH. Don't poke logic shaped holes in my reasoning.

BLAINE ANDERSON ANNOUNCES EXCITING NEW PROJECT

A lot of you will be familiar with Blaine Anderson, if not for his stints on the runway, then for his time as the star of the infamous ‘GAP ATTACK' adverts that marked his debut into the modelling business. As one of the few models who have successfully made the transition from commercials to the catwalk, Blaine is something of a legend in the business, not least for his versatile looks.

“Blaine can go from bad-boy to prep-school in a second,” says Thane Coltfield, the man behind the ground-breaking Duplicity line, which marked Blaine's introduction to the world of fashion. “I just love that about him.”

Blaine's not shy of the press, either, and has often been commented upon by his peers for his tendency to ‘overshare' to the public.

“Yeah,” Blaine says. “I kind of just open my mouth and speak without much consideration for what I want people to know and what people want to know. I don't think America needed to know that I had an obsession with Mulan in my formative years, but that's me and my mouth, I guess.”

Which is why, it's something of a surprise that Blaine's being so tight-lipped about his newest upcoming project.

“I just want to make one thing clear: this project is very, very close to my heart,” Blaine tells us. “I care about it so, so much and don't want to screw it up. It involves working with someone I've kind of always admired, and the issues addressed in it are things I personally believe in. It's not fashion work and the guy in charge of it is probably someone you've never heard of, but when I was offered this chance, I just couldn't turn it down.”

“…but that's me and my mouth, I guess.”
-Blaine Anderson

Blaine, if you weren't so goddamn adorable, I would be making several crass jokes about that statement. As it stands, I can't do so without feeling like I've just destroyed a child's innocence.

I'm with you there. It sort of feels like you're committing some sort of sin…

Ha! I laugh at your puny consciences! #I bet that's not all he can do with his mouth #Oh God, you were right #I'm going straight to hell

NEW STARBUCKS ADS SPARK CONTROVERSY

Just yesterday, Starbucks unveiled the first of their new set of adverts and in doing so, sparked a huge storm of controversy. The ad, which can be viewed here is the story of two young gay males in a conservative town, falling in love over cups of coffee, accompanied with the slogan, Coffee For Every Occasion.

According to Starbucks, it's apparently the first in a string of adverts, which will show an overarching plot over time.

Susannah Wake, the chief of marketing for Starbucks, released the following statement to the press this morning:

“Starbucks has, and always will, support equal opportunities for its employees, regardless of race, gender or sexuality. We understand that to some people, these adverts may be seen as confrontational, but we as a company are united in addressing this issue, and will not withdraw them from the television or apologise for their contents. In the words of the brilliant Stonewall campaign: ‘Some people are gay. Get over it.'”

(read more)

“… In the words of the brilliant Stonewall campaign: ‘Some people are gay. Get over it.'”
-Susannah Wake, Chief of Marketing for Starbucks

Oh, can you say BURN?!

LOL.

I laughed so hard when I read her statement. It was kind of an unapologetic ‘fuck you, bigots.'

Susannah Wake, you are one BADASS CHICK. This is one HECK of a brave move. Balls of fucking steel, guys.

Well, all in all, Starbucks should be pretty glad of the controversy. Their brand-name is getting a lot of airtime suddenly…

OK, can we all just take a STEP BACK. I think we need to focus on the truly important issue at hand here: how cute Blaine looks in his little private school blazer.

OMG, Thane Coltfield totally called this: “Blaine can go from bad-boy to PREP-SCHOOL in a second.”

And, did you see the shot of his smile? Dead. Right there.

Kurt Hummel, you are one lucky little bastard.

@KurtHummel The best thing about making commercials for Starbucks? Lots and lots of free coffee.

@KurtHummel And @BlaineAnderson, of course.

@BlaineAnderson The best thing about making commercials for Starbucks? These ads may just make everyone forget my earlier ventures in TV advertising...

@BlaineAnderson And @KurtHummel. Almost forgot that.

Just putting it out there – there is no way these people are anything less than more than friends.

It took five times reading that statement for it to make sense.

KLAINE FTW!!!

^^^ Totally called that pairing name.

They're like pure cotton candy. Diabetes inducing. In a good way.

[VIDEO]

The latest Starbucks Ad – Courage.

SO. FUCKING. PERFECT.

COURAGE. I think I cried.

These commercials are more like a good TV drama with copious amounts of product placement. And a cast of gay guys.

This may be strange, but in the last couple of frames, it's just a side profile, but I swear that there is Rachel Berry, the up and coming Broadway star.

Oh my God! I think you're right!

I think I fall just a little bit more in love with these boys every ad.

STARBUCKS ADS BECOME POP CULTURE HIT

Given the limited representation of gay teens on mainstream TV, it didn't come as much of a surprise that Starbucks' latest string of advertisements created quite the splash when they hit our screens just three weeks ago.

The ads follow the story of two gay males in a small, conservative town in the Mid-West, Rhyss and Alex. Each advert so far, of which there have been three, leads in with an event, and ends over coffee. In the first ad, we're introduced to Rhyss, a bullied teen, who infiltrates a prep-school to try and spy for his show choir. He then meets Alex, an out-and-proud teenager, who takes him out for coffee as opposed to beating him up for spying. And so it all starts.

Pretty basic right?

So, why is there so much hype surrounding these adverts?

If we look at this on a purely pragmatic basis, the controversial nature of the subject matter is at least partially to blame. Just moments after the first advert aired, there was public outcry. Accusations of “glamourizing the homosexual lifestyle” flew and there was declarations of this being a “crime against television and an abuse of the right to free speech.” Between the media controversy and the online campaigning rallying behind these ads, the first ad, tentatively titled “First Sight” has received over ten times the amount of airtime that Starbucks initially paid for.

And then, there's the cast.

There's no denying these ads are pretty start-studded, featuring Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson – two of the most famous young models currently in the business – and more recently, the up and coming Broadway star, Rachel Berry, but it wouldn't be true to attribute these so-called ‘commercial drama's' popularity to the fame of the two leads.

James Emmerson, a marketing specialist, describes the ads as ‘a refreshing take on an otherwise over-done and over-worked concept.'

“The fact of the matter is,” says Emmerson, “that these ads aren't just about being gay. They're about being teenagers. Rhyss is undeniably the underdog – a character we can all relate to – and Alex is just as insecure and alone, but merely much, much better at hiding it. Starbucks is tapping into one of the largest growing markets these days – the teen market. It's not necessarily a wise move to take up, but it's a strong one.”

Although Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson were not available to comment on the latest ads, Rachel Berry supplied the following statement:

“This job is something I'm finding myself falling in love with. The issues covered in these ads are things I wholly believe in, not only because of my close friendship with Kurt, but because of the fact that I grew up with two gay dads. I can't wait for you all to see what there is in store for you in the coming segments!”

Rachel and Kurt are friends? HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?????

They went to the same high school and were in show choir together. #Wikipedia Ninja

Show choir? I didn't know Kurt sang…

Found their choir's old YouTube channel! [LINK]

OMG! They're so adorable in the early vids!

Excuse me while I go and suffocate myself with surplus fluff.

OK, rant time.

I, like many of you guys, have been avidly watching the Starbucks ads – or The Chronicles of Coffee as I like to call them – and enjoying them immensely. When Rachel Berry's character was introduced (Laura, in case you wanted a name), I'll admit I was sceptical, because, well, what purpose did she serve?

It all came clear this ‘segment'.

And I am Pissed. Off.

OK, OK, OK, it's not the segment I'm angry about. I actually thought it was nice to have Alex struggle with a personal problem for once (even if the whole ‘maybe I'm bi' seemed a bit off-kilter for the character) and the resolution between Rhyss and him (RHEX FTW!) was very well done, but what pissed me off was the reaction to this on certain websites (coughtumblrcough) and social networking media (coughtwittercough).

HE'S GAY. GET OVER IT.

I don't give a shit about whether or not Alex is bi. It doesn't freakin' matter. So just STFU and get on with your lives, OK?

Blaine, like Kurt, is playing a CHARACTER. These CHARACTERS are not, in any way, representative of who they really are. Stop projecting the character's feelings/emotions onto the actor and STOP FUCKING BLOGGING/TWEETING ABOUT IT.

Alex is gay. Blaine is I-really-don't-give-a-flying-fuck.

END OF.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why you do not fight your wars over the sacred grounds of Tumblr.

This is a very good point. After the last segment, there's been so much crap floating around, especially with people talking about ‘Alaura' and whatnot. There's a difference between airing your views and shoving them down other people's throats. Learn it. Respect it.

It really gets me sometimes, how The Chronicles of Coffee (am using that name now, thanks) are all about accepting who you are and who other people are and yet people still use them to create shitstorms about things which are in complete opposition to this. Grr. Annoyed be I.

I agree on the whole Blaine front. He's stated again and again that he won't answer questions about his personal life and I think we need to respect that. It doesn't matter if he's gay or not (although my personal gaydar is pinging, in case you were wondering) because he's still a person. Who he sleeps with – and whether he sleeps with anyone – is no one's business but his own.

Now I feel bad, because all I have to add to this discussion is a tentative “BURN!”

@KurtHummel Valentine's Day! Hoping you're all having as great a day as I am! [PIC]

This is adorable.

Is it wishful thinking that I totally picture this as Kurt-and-Blaine, with Rachel just kind of crashing?

I thus name this friendship Klainchel. They're so cute together, with their hot chocolates and fluffy mittens and full-on smiles.

GUYS GUYS GUYS – LOOK AT THE CUP LOGOS!

Le GASP! It's not Starbucks!

Is this like what happens if you take your mask off when working at Disney World?

TREACHERY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, So I'm going to try some ‘mainstream crap' – sue me

As many of you are aware, last week, the Starbucks Ads – now officially titled The Coffee Chronicles – reached the peak of their popularity, when it was revealed that they were trending. Now, I still stand by my general rule for the internet, but I guess I realised that this had reached and passed the point of ridiculousness.

So, I decided that I would test the waters and actually watch these ads. I put aside a couple of minutes one afternoon, plugged myself into my laptop and brought up YouTube.

And this is the only time you'll ever hear me say this, but this is the one thing I have ever found that proves that just because something is popular, that doesn't make it terrible.

I actually like the way things are handled in these ads. I like the characters, I like the way that they're shot, I like the way that Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson play off each other.

In short, I like these ads.

Which seems completely weird to me, because I've never been into this sort of commercial gratification, but they're actually really, really good. I don't think I've ever felt this invested in a fictional couple – ever. I don't think I've ever actually wanted to watch the TV before, just on the off-chance I may catch one of these ads during a commercial break.

So, this is me, putting my hands up in the air, firmly humbled. I like these ads.

Let the bashing begin.

Just stopping by at my local Starbucks, and guess who I run into? Blaine Anderson. He autographed my coffee cup. It says ‘Courage –Blaine'

 [PIC]

That was always my favourite line from the commercials.

Dying of envy.

Where can I get one? #No seriously #I want one

BLAINE ANDERSON COMES OUT!

There have been rumours, ladies and gents, ever since the infamous Chronicles of Coffee started to air, that maybe this subject matter was of a more personal standing for both the main leads. Anderson's sexuality has been a hotly debated issue, even with the model's strict stance on ‘no comments' in regards to his personal life and just yesterday, Anderson was spotted at Passions, a gay bar located in the nightclub district of LA.

Today, Anderson finally relinquished his firm grip on his silence and said the following to the press…

(read more)

“I guess I've kind of invited that question, haven't I? In which case, I have to say that yes, I am. And I can only really apologise for it taking me so long to come out and admit it.”
-Blaine Anderson, in response to the question: “So, Blaine does this mean you're gay?”

Go, Klainers, go!

Aw, Blaine. I'm so proud of you *dabs eyes with tissue*

This is going to sound really, really callous but, guys. CALLED IT!

Right guys, I think we need to take a moment to consider this: coming out is an extremely personal thing and for someone who has repeatedly stated that he doesn't want his personal life splashed across the press, this is a really big deal.

^^^ This is actually a pretty important point and I think we should make an effort to all stay serious but my brain's kinda shorted out with BLAINE'S GAY OMG HE'S ACTUALLY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY KLAINE GAY GAY GAY KURT BLAINE GAY GAY GAY

HE'S GAY KURT'S GAY OMG MAYBE THEY'RE DATING BUT WERE LIKE KEEPING IT A SECRET BECAUSE BLAINE WASN'T OUT AND NOW THEY CAN COME OUT AND BE GAY AND HAPPY TOGETHER IN PUBLIC

^^^^ SOMEONE FIC THIS. NOW.

KLAINE: CANON, BITCHES (ALMOST)

Holy hell, what did I just stumble across?

‘Shipping. It's a Serious Business.

@KurtHummel Nervous about tonight's segment, @BlaineAnderson?

Penultimate Chronicles of Coffee ad tonight! Who's psyched?

Recently, I've been going back and watching all of the old segments. I don't know, they just seem to take on a whole new meaning now that we know what we know about Blaine. It seems oddly poignant. It stops being about Alex, a scared teen, and sort of changes into being about Blaine, a scared young adult.

Rhex has to happen this episode. HAS TO.

It's coming to a close guys. It's been a long haul, but I have loved every second of it. Looking forward to tonight's episode!

INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY

Alex, nervous and twitchy, shifts above his coffee. Doesn't make eye-contact. Rhyss regards him closely.

RHYSS
OK, are you going to finally tell me what this is about, Alex?

ALEX
(looks up; gains courage)
Rhyss, there is a moment where you say to yourself, ‘Oh, there you are. I've been looking for you forever.' Watching you sing that song this week, Rhyss, that was a moment for me – about you. You move me, Rhyss, and this--
(gestures around)
--this would just be an excuse to spend more time with you.

He stares into Rhyss' eyes, as if waiting for rejection. There's none. Then, as if encouraged, Alex surges forward and smashes their lips together.

FADE TO END TITLE: “COFFEE FOR EVERY OCCASION”

IT HAPPENED IT HAPPENED IT HAPPENED

OMG THEY KISSED! THEY KISSED!!!1!!!!

THEY KISSED AND EVERYTHING IS RHEX AND NOTHING HURTS

YOU GUYS GO ON WITHOUT ME, OK? BECAUSE THAT SPEECH JUST ABOUT KILLED ME

IT'S CANON, BITCHES!

FDHSJFHSDJF,,DFJD THIS IS I CAN'T EVEN

THIS IS JUST I HAVE FEELINGS AND I DON'T CAN'T WHAT IS AIR CAN'T BREATHE. DEAD.

I LEGIT SCREAMED WHEN THEY KISSED BUT MY MOM DIDN'T HAVE TO CHECK ON ME BECAUSE SHE WAS THERE TOO AND SHE ALSO SCREAMED AND THEN MY SISTER SCREAMED AND BASICALLY IT WAS ONE BIG SCREAMING FEST.

DEAD. ALL OF US. DEAD.

Blaine Anderson and Kurt Hummel shopping together!
[PIC]

Gah, they're so freaking adorable together.

I love how Kurt is like a man on a mission and Blaine just seems to have gotten saddled with bag-carrying duty.

OK, I'm not a Klainer, but just look at the way Blaine is gazing at Kurt. Someone's got a crush…

Major heart eyes, guys.

This has been a good week. First, we get a Rhex kiss, and now we get Klaine pics. Everything is good and right in the world.

OMG, guyssssss, Ellen just updated her website. BLAINE'S ON THE SHOW TONIGHT!

What? Isn't tonight when the last commercial is going to air?

Excuse me, I need to go and scream into my pillow.

And goodbye plans of revision. Looks like I'm going to be winging my physics exam tomorrow.

INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY [FLASHBACK]

Rhyss and Alex mid-kiss. Alex breaks off the contact.

ALEX
We should … practice.

RHYSS
(breathless)
I thought we were.

Alex dives back in for another kiss.

FADE TO:

INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY [PRESENT]

Alex and Rhyss sit opposite each other, Alex staring straight at Rhyss' face.

ALEX
I love you.

Rhyss' eyes widen and he swallows his mouthful of coffee before replying:

RHYSS
I love you too.

Rhyss reaches across the table and rests his hand on top of Alex's, and then, off their hands, nestled together in front of a Styrofoam coffee cup –

FADE TO END TITLE: COFFEE FOR EVERY OCCASION

That was just…

There are tears. In my eyes. I don't even. JFC.

THEIR HANDS. THEIR HANDS. I JUST CAN'T EVEN.

It feels EARNED, guys, and I … Oh drat, I swore I wouldn't cry.

Fuckers. Who do they think they are? My emotions aren't even doing what I want them to anymore.

He said, “I love you.” HE SAID IT. I just. I just don't even know anymore, OK?

I feel like someone shut my emotions in a trouser press. Everything hurts and nothing hurts at the same time. Does that even make sense?

I don't think I will have recovered enough in time for Ellen. Why do they do this to us?

“So,” Ellen says, grinning at the camera, “coming up on the show, we have the star of the commercials that have gripped the nation's heart and refused to let go – a tale of two you gay males as they struggle to make their way in the world and fall in love, all told over steaming cups of Starbucks coffee. Critics are calling the commercials, ‘astounding' and ‘shockingly well-made' – ‘this should have been a full length drama'. So, Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the show, Blaine Anderson!”

The applause is deafening, practically drowning out the music as it starts. The distant beat of Tegan and Sara's Closer can barely be heard as Blaine dances along to it, bouncing across the stage to Ellen. When he reaches her, Blaine and Ellen hug before they sit down.

“So, Blaine,” Ellen starts, “how does it feel to be the star of what is commonly referred to as the ‘single most important cultural phenomenon of the year'?”

Blaine laughs nervously. “Someone actually said that?” At Ellen's nod, he shakes his head. “Wow. I don't know, then? Pretty great, I'd guess.”

“You've come a long way from slightly inappropriate serenades in GAP,” Ellen teases gently.

Blaine laughs. “Just when I was starting to live that down…”

“So, let's talk about the commercials,” Ellen says. “The last one aired tonight,” she pauses as a cacophonous cheer goes up in the audience. When the noise has died down, she continues, “With record breaking viewing stats, and I don't know if you've been on Twitter, but things are getting pretty hairy right about now.”

“Oh God, Twitter, don't even get me started,” Blaine sighs. “I can barely use the site anymore. My phone keeps freezing up every time I try to log on because of all the new tweets in my inbox. It's crazy.”

“It is,” Ellen agrees. “Last week, there was something of an explosive reaction to the Rhyss-Alex kiss. How did you deal with that?”

“Explosive would be the right word,” Blaine confirms. “There was such a huge response to that segment, both positive and negative. It was so weird to see my face on the news, lip-locked with Kurt's, and listen to all these people calling it a disgrace. I mean, I've received a fair amount of hate mail these past few weeks—”

“Which is ridiculous, because, seriously, what can you hate about this face?” Ellen interrupts and behind them a huge image of Blaine pouting at the camera appears.

Blaine laughs at the picture. “You've been on my facebook,” he states.

“Never accept a friend request from Ellen,” Ellen nods. “Sorry, continue.”

“Where was I? Oh, hate mail.” He pauses. “So I have received my fair share these past few weeks, even more so since I came out, but the sheer volume of support and encouragement we've received in contrast to this has been phenomenal.”

A supportive cheer goes up again in the audience. Blaine grins.

“And by ‘we', you mean you and Kurt, right?” Ellen asks.

“Right,” Blaine agrees.

“Whilst we're on the topic of Kurt, I've been instructed by my twitter following to ask you a particular question,” Ellen says.

“Shoot,” Blaine says.

Ellen reaches across for a card. “Right, here it is. ‘Can you ask Blaine if he knows what Klaine is?' So?”

“Klaine?” Blaine nods. “Yeah, I know what that is.”

“You do?”

Blaine smiles. “I think my fans tend to forget that I do have a Tumblr account too.”

“So what is it?” Ellen presses.

“It's like a portmanteau of mine and Kurt's names,” Blaine explains. “Kind of like a couple name, or something.”

“Right,” Ellen nods. “Because a lot of people seem to like to think that you and Kurt are together. A couple.”

Blaine takes a deep breath. Jump, he thinks. Courage.

“That's because we are.”

The screams this time are literally deafening.