Not Another Facebook Fic
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Not Another Facebook Fic: Goodbye


T - Words: 1,374 - Last Updated: Oct 27, 2012
Story: Closed - Chapters: 22/? - Created: Oct 27, 2012 - Updated: Oct 27, 2012
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Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Can't believe we're graduating high school. All the memories, even the bad ones, I'll miss them.

Mercedes Jones-Evans: I counted how many slushies we got, Kurt: 34 in freshman year, 36 in sophomore, 22 in junior, and, not including the celebratory one, 4 in this senior year.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Oh wow.

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: And since I've transferred, I've gotten, counting Sebastian's surgery-inducing slushie, 6.

Rachel Hudson: What is this, counting how much abuse we suffered?

~4 people like this.

Warren Rhodes-Richardson: Did I ever get around to apologizing for that?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: No.

Warren Rhodes-Richardson: I wasn't asking you, Kurt. Nonetheless, I'm sorry, Blaine.

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: Apology accepted.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Now grovel.

Blaine Anderson Hummel: Kurt, stop.

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: Why am I never around to know what's going on? What did Warren do?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: He threw a slushie that was meant for me, but Blaine got in the way and had to have surgery because Meerkat Face laced it with rock salt.

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: …

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: I have to go.

~Joel Richardson-Rhodes has logged off.

!

Sam Evans: Remember when everyone thought I was gay?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: I'm still surprised you're not.

~Santana Lopez-Pierce and Quinn Fabray like this.

Sam Evans: Well, just wait, in the future, I'll be your spiritual brother-in-law.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Just because Mercedes is my spiritual sister doesn't mean anything. I love you, 'Cedes.

Mercedes Jones-Evans: Love you too, White Boy. Did you find out if you got into NYADA yet?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: No, not yet. Rachel, Finn, and I are going to open our acceptance letters together, so we will find out soon.

!

Warren Rhodes-Richardson: Thanks a pantsful, Kurt.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: What'd I do?

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: I beat the hell out of Warren for what he did.

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: Are you okay, Sebastian?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: *seething*

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: C'mon, Kurt…

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: But he deserved it!

~Warren Rhodes-Richardson tagged himself in a photo.

Finn Hudson: Wow, dude, who did that to you?

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: Are you seriously trying to get sympathy from these people? You know, that's low, even for you.

 

~Nick Duval-Sterling and Jeff Sterling-Duval have logged on.

Nick Duval-Sterling: We're back!

Warren Rhodes-Richardson: Oh joy.

Jeff Sterling-Duval: Nobody missed us? *cries*

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: It was peaceful while it lasted.

~10 people like this.

Nick Duval-Sterling: *comforting sobbing Jeff*

Harry Freakin' Potter: I missed you guys.

~Jeff Sterling-Duval and Nick Duval-Sterling likes this.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Haven't seen him in a while.

Harry Freakin' Potter: It's called college, just wait 'til next year.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: How old are you?

Harry Freakin' Potter: 20.

Jeff Sterling-Duval: You don't look 20, more like 17.

Harry Freakin' Potter: Flattering, but I'm 20.

!

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: We're going to need new people next year.

Sugar Motta: What, there's like 6 of us left now, right? Rory, didn't you say your VISA expires at the end of the year?

Rory Flanagan: Okay, I have a confession: I only said that so I could be with you on Valentine's Day.

Sugar Motta: Artie, are you on?

Artie Abrams: Yeah, what's up?

Sugar Motta: You wanna go on that date? Now that Rory's confessed to lying and since he's taken anyway, it's time for us to take that chance.

Artie Abrams: Sure thing. Pick you up at 7, k?

Sugar Motta: K.

!

Wade Adams: Remember how Unique said she might have to transfer?

Mercedes Jones-Evans: Are you going to?

Wade Adams: Most likely, anything to get away from Coach St. Sucks.

~Kurt Hummel-Anderson and 6 others like this.

Jesse St. James: Fine, leave. We'll win Nationals next year without you.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Damn, St. James, you have some real anger issues. Besides, if Unique joins the New Directions, you are therefore, pardon my French, you are fucked.

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: Yeah, you're fucked all right, and all for spite. You can kiss your sorry ass goodbye. Totally fucked, will they mess you up? Well, you know they're gonna try.

~43 people like this.

Jesse St. James: Screw you.

!

Finn Hudson: I didn't get into the Actors Studio.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: I didn't get into NYADA.

Rachel Hudson: I got into NYADA.

~Everyone on Facebook sits in shock.

!

Lukas Graham: Hi, everybody. I transferred back to McKinley. Where's Kurt?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Lukas? *mulling it over* Luke?

Lukas Graham: Hi, Kurt.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: You're back. Where have you been?

Lukas Graham: Uh, remember that thing a few years ago with the guy who got stabbed outside the gay bar?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Yeah…

Lukas Graham: Guilty.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: You stabbed someone?!

Lukas Graham: It was self-defense; problem is no one believed me.

Jesse St. James: I always knew you were a psycho.

Lukas Graham: Nice to know he's still around. If you knew, why'd you want me back so badly?

Jesse St. James: I wasn't thinking straight.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: I still can't believe you dated St. Sucks, Luke.

Jesse St. James: Bite me, Hummel.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: How hard?

~5 people like this.

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: Kurt, who is this?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Another ex.

Lukas Graham: I thought I was more than that.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Oh, Luke, you are, but you're not the first ex to show up… anyway, this is Blaine, my boyfriend. Blaine, say hi to Luke.

Santana Lopez-Pierce: I remember him now. He was that weird loner who won the duets competition with Porcelain and cost me a free meal at BreadstiX last year.

Mercedes Jones-Evans: You mean us, Satan.

Lukas Graham: I resent "weird loner". Besides, at least I remembered your 16th, Kurt.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: That's true, you did.

Mercedes Jones-Evans: You mean we didn't throw you a sweet 16? This weekend, you're getting a sweet 16 party. Everyone come over and let's plan this thing. And don't you dare object to it.

~Rachel Hudson and 14 others like this.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: My friends, they're crazy but I love them.

!

Mercedes Jones-Evans: I love you, Sam. If it weren't for you recording Disco Inferno, I wouldn't be getting a recording contract as a backup singer!

~46 people like this.

Sam Evans: I told you that video would shine light on your future.

Noah Puckerman: I got a C- on that test, which is a Puckerman A+. I'm graduating! And it's all thanks to Coach Beiste and the ND guys, even you, Blaine.

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: Uh, you're welcome.

!

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: *sighs* It feels like so long ago that dumpster had me in it. By the way, guys, I never got that jacket back.

Finn Hudson: I kept it safe for you. It's in my closet.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Aw, Finn, you did care back then.

Brittany Pierce-Lopez: Kurtie, I found that one spot in the gym we made out in once.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: *facepalm*

Nick Duval-Sterling: Hey, Brittany, can you show us?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: What are you two doing here?

Jeff Sterling-Duval: Surprise visit. And we wanted to see where you made out with a girl.

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: Should I get the electric flyswatter, Kurt?

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Yes, honey, there's going to be some fried Warblers soon enough.

Nick Duval-Sterling: Kurt's gone crazy again. Run!

Joel Richardson-Rhodes: I always wondered how those two were my friends so long.

!

Rachel Hudson via iPhone: I still can't believe you all put me on a train.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Rachel, you are going to New York and to NYADA whether you like it or not.

Jesse St. James: I talked to Carmen Tibideaux at Nationals. You are the most talented person I know.

~Rachel Hudson likes this.

Jesse St. James: I also wish you and Finn the best.

Rachel Hudson via iPhone: Thanks, Jesse.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: I'll be out there with you soon, promise.

Quinn Fabray: Don't forget about your New Haven pass.

Rachel Hudson via iPhone: I won't. Thank you, Quinn.

Santana Lopez-Pierce: Maybe next year, we girls and Porcelain can share a place.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: Blaine's coming over every weekend, okay?

Santana Lopez-Pierce: We'll be sure to make a peephole so as to watch Porcelain and Hobbit get it on.

Kurt Hummel-Anderson: You know what? I never saw you and Brittany make your lady kisses, as Britt called it.

Santana Lopez-Pierce: What? Do you want to?

Blaine Anderson-Hummel: We're good.


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