Chapter Twenty-Six:

I can fake a smile,

I can force a laugh.

I can dance and play the part,

If thats what you ask.

I can do it.

            Kurt took Rachel home. He tried to soothe her, rubbing her back and squeezing her hand comfortingly throughout the entirety of the cab ride, but she didnt seem capable of acknowledging him. She only stared out the window, her palm splayed across her still-flat abdomen as a river of tears streamed down her cheeks.

            When they reached his apartment, he helped Rachel onto the couch and fixed her a cup of herbal tea. A whirlwind of questions spun through his mind, but he shut his lips determinedly. Rachel had been there for him and now it was his turn to be there for her.

            Surprisingly, she fell asleep almost immediately. Kurt covered her gingerly with a blanket before stepping out on the fire escape and calling Blaine back. There was something dangerous in the way hed sounded in the voicemail; like he was seconds from breaking down into pieces.

Blaine picked up on the second ring. "Hello? Blaine? Is everything alright?" he asked urgently, steadying himself against the frosted steel railing.

He heard Blaine inhale shakily. "Hi. I-Uh, yeah. Why?"

"The voicemail you left me. You didnt sound okay. Something about your mom?" The piercing siren of an ambulance wailed in the distance.

"Fuck. I didnt even know I called you. Shit," Blaine hissed.

Kurts nerves spiked. Something was definitely wrong. He desperately hoped he hadnt resorted to the drugs. "Whats going on? If youre in trouble, you can tell me. You can tell me anything, Blaine. I want to help you," he said-pleaded. He needed to make Blaine understand that he wasnt going to leave. Not again.

"Its just-" Blaine sniffed and Kurts heart lurched. He sounded so utterly broken. "-my mom showed up yesterday out of nowhere."

"What?!" Kurt glanced toward the living room where Rachel slept, lowering his voice. "The mom that walked out on you mom? Oh, my god. What did she say?"

"No, the mom that I mysteriously adopted overnight. Yes that mom," he retorted sarcastically; a defense mechanism. "She just appeared and said she was sorry and tried to pretend like nothing happened and I dont know what to do, Kurt."

He took a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut. "Tell her to go fuck herself. She doesnt deserve you, Blaine. You cant just show up at your sons doorstep fifteen years later and expect him to forgive you."

"Shes my mom..."

"She left you alone with your abusive father." He was unbelievably furious. What kind of a mother deserted their son and then expected forgiveness after a simple, pathetic hello?

"But she came back...Doesnt that mean something? I dont know what to do," Blaine whispered. Those words-those damn words-that he just kept repeating struck something inside of Kurt. He wanted to help, more than anything, but he didnt know what to do anymore than Blaine did.

He sighed. "If you can find it in you to forgive her, then do so. And if you cant, hopefully thatll teach her a lesson," he replied gently.

"Im just really scared." The shattering of Kurts heart was nearly audible. He leaned forward, staring down hard at the blinking lights of the city and willed himself to be strong.

"She cant hurt you. Not anymore."

"But shes going to," Blaine murmured.

"I wont let her, Blaine. I wont let anyone hurt you."

"Im so sorry that I drunk-dialed you. I love you so much, Kurt. Please always remember that," Blaine begged. How could he even care about something so miniscule? Blaine fucked up, Kurt fucked up, people fucked up, but that didnt make them bad.

"I dont care about that. I just wanted to make sure youre okay. I love you, too," he insisted.

"Im okay, I think. I better let you go. Im sure youre busy. Im sorry."

Rachel stirred inside, sitting up and peering around at a loss. "Rachel just woke up. I-Are you positive, Blaine? I can come over if you need me to-" He held up one finger, motioning to Rachel that hed be in momentarily.

"Yeah, yeah. Um, Im fine, Kurt."

"Blaine Devon Anderson, Ive seen you at your worst and your best and both of them only make me love you more," he said. "I want to help. I dont care about anything else. Ill be there in an hour, alright?"

"I said Im fine. Im really fine."

Kurt snorted. "Better leave the door unlocked. I dont want to wake Christian. Love you."

"Kurt!" He grinned at Blaines protest before hanging up and slipping inside. His spirits were immediately crushed the second he saw Rachels once again tear-streaked face as she rocked back and forth on the cushion.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. "Itll be alright," he murmured, but she only shook her head. When Rachel had calmed down enough to walk, Kurt took her back to her apartment and tucked her into bed. He dialed Santana and left her an urgent voicemail telling her to take the rest of the night off and hed pay her for whatever she was missing.

With guilt settled in the pit of his stomach, he took a cab to Blaines. He wondered if he was an awful friend for leaving Rachel or a good person for trying to help his boyfriend as the cab rumbled through the silent streets of New York. It was ironic, in a way. Rachel was struggling with the new life budding inside of her while the woman whod brought Blaine into the world tormented him.

Kurt tried the doorknob, not wanting to wake Christian, and found it unlocked. He pushed into the living room, welcomed by a rush of warm air, and shut the door quietly behind him. The lights were turned off and after smacking his knee on the coffee table, he flicked on the flashlight on his phone and made his way down the hall. He entered what he knew was Blaines room only to find an empty bed. It was then that he heard a soft sob bleed through the bathroom door one over.

      His heart thumping deafeningly in his ears, he knocked gingerly before opening it. Blaine was curled up against the marble tub, holding up his hands defensively to block the flood of bright light that invaded his dark little huddle.

            Kurt broke at the sight of him, kneeling down and taking Blaine into his arms. "Im so sorry she hurt you, B," he said, voice shattering. "Im so sorry."

            He shook his head. "I just dont know what to do. She left me. She left me by myself with him," Blaine hissed between clenched teeth.

            Kurt was at a loss for words. He yearned for the days when a sweet kiss and a Hello Kitty band-aid could fix everything. "Its over now. Its over and they cant hurt you anymore. Im here."

            "She left me. She just left me," he repeated. "And I was finally getting over it and she came back. Why did she have to come back?"

            Kurt surged with fury. It wasnt fair. It wasnt fair that such a beautiful soul was plagued by so much agony. He wanted to grip Kylie Anderson by the neck and shake her, but instead he grabbed Blaines shoulders and turned him so they squarely faced each other. "You have got to stop holding onto the past. All its doing is ruining your future and I wont let that happen. She did what she did and theres nothing we can do to change it. Now you have to decide whether or not youre going to forgive her," he told Blaine determinedly.

            "I dont know." Blaine sounded so fragile; he was a child again, trapped by his fathers presence and his mothers abandonment.

            "I dont need you to know, I need you to think."

            Blaine tangled his fingers in the soaked fabric of Kurts t-shirt, as if he would sink if he let go. "I guess I need to talk to her. But I dont know if I can," he said.

            "Ill be right with you every step of the way. Im here to stay, through thick and thin," Kurt insisted. And he meant every word.

            "But what if she doesnt want to talk to me? I kind of...snapped at her," Blaine explained, dragging the back of his hand across his face.

            Kurt smiled lovingly. "She didnt come all this way for nothing. She mustve expected that youd be mad-furious. Whatever you said was justified. You have to understand that." Leaning down, Kurt cupped his jaw and lightly touched his lips to Blaines, swiping a fallen tear with the pad of his thumb. "Now can we please get up off the floor? Its been a long day and my  back is killing me."

            Blaine released a choked off giggle. "Yeah. Yeah, we should get up off the floor."

            Kurt laced their fingers together, squeezing gently as they strode back into the kitchen. Blaine dug out a bag of wheat bread questioningly. "Toast?" Kurt nodded, taking a seat behind the bar. "So, what made your day particularly long?" he asked as he slipped a couple pieces into the toaster.

            Kurt picked at a stain on the counter, chewing the inside of his cheek. He hesitated, not wanting to add to Blaines stress. If there was anyone Kurt could talk to about Dave, it was Blaine. "Well...Remember David Karofsky?" he wanted to know. "Hes kind of a stripper now. And um...He has HIV."

            The bag of bread fell from Blaines hands and tumbled to the ground. "Wait, what?!" he exclaimed. "When were you talking to Karofsky? When were you talking to Karofsky and how is he a stripper and HIV? What?"

            Kurt chuckled, holding up his hands in a shrug. "He works at the club Santana got a job at. I kind of lured him into meeting with me. I didnt know it would turn out like...that." His grin faded and he dropped his gaze back down to his hands.

            "Jeez, who wouldve known, huh?"

            "I know. And thats not the only surprise I discovered today," he declared before he could stop himself. Telling Blaine was dangerous, he knew that much, especially since Rachel wasnt even close to making a decision.

            Blaine stooped to prop his elbows on the table, smirking up at him through long lashes. "Do tell. I need all the Hummel gossip."

            Blaine was just so darn cute that Kurt felt the words leaving his mouth before he even processed what he was saying. "Not sure how juicy this one is. Dont tell Christian," he whispered, moving in closer, "but Rachels pregnant."

            At the same time Blaines mouth dropped open, there came a clatter from the front door and a loud cry of, "WHAT?".  And it didnt come from Blaine.