Scene 8: our first time.

Kurt was hovering above me, both of us breathing heavily our hearts biting in an UN-human speed but still in complete unison. I almost forgot how this feels, its been months since Sebastian has been at the same place that Kurt is in right now, the deed was the same deed, dicks, mouths, asses and prostates, but it was still so different. With Kurt there, him and I being as close as two people can get to being one, I felt so complete.  Like every bad thing that happened to me, my moms death, my dads suicide, my brother leaving me behind in the hands of stranger who calmed me as his own and took away my life in more than one way...all of this was worth for Kurt to come in and sweep me off my feet, to love me more then I deserve, to make me feel like Im something, like a normal being again. It took me a while to get to this realization, until now I thought Kurt and I were in love. But now I realized its not just that. Yeah sure, we were in love, and yeah we were in love from the first moment our eyes met, but now I came to know that we were each others soul mates as well. The next step is for us to become mates and maybe get married... and that was it, everything would be perfect. And I am on my way to get me and Kurt our happy ending.

Its been a rough few weeks for me, mainly because of Sebastian. The talk we had in the hallway the other day shaken me to the core. Every time our eyes meet and he has that stupid grin up on his meerkat face its like my heart belongs to someone else, and not in a good way. I know that it isnt me, when I want to be closer to him, its not really me, its just my nature, wanting to be closer to its mate. It wouldnt even bother me if it was just that, because Kurt would make it go away and remind me who I truly love and belong with, but sadly, it wasnt the case. Every time I was with Kurt now, whenever things got physical between us there was something in me that tried to stop me. Tried. I never let it change my mind; I also made sure Kurt doesnt suspect a thing. For a second I thought I was doing the wrong thing by hiding my true feelings from him but then I thought, how am I supposed to tell the love of my life that every time I see him, talk to him hold his hand or kiss him, my brain is telling me Im doing something bad? I could not do that. Then, I remembered the thing I found in the library a few weeks ago when I looked for a way to break a mating... that book said that if you want to stop being mates with someone, you need to mate with someone else, so you have an emotional connection to support you when you break the one with your true mate. This basically meant I had to do 3 things: fall for someone else-check. Dont have any other feelings for your correct mate-double check. And you and your lover need to fulfill your love-that was the hard part.

It all started a week ago, Kurt and I were in his room, in the same position we are in now only with more cloths and less lube. We have been kissing, were lost our shirts in the process and we were grinding against each other. We have been like that for a while back then, every time I tried to go even a little bit farther, like sending my hand a little lower or unzip Kurts pants, he stops me halfway. I didnt care at first, but when I realized we had to do it in order for me to forget about Sebastian, things got more argent.

"Okay Kurt, whats wrong?” I asked. I didnt mean my voice to sound so aggressive and uncaring but that was only because I hadnt had a clue on what was stooping Kurt. We will be together for 6 months next week and that was enough time to wait, I was ready for ages and what was taking Kurt so long?! Oh god I sound like a 17 year old teenage boy who couldnt keep it in his pants.

"Nothing. Why?” Kurt asked, his red cheeks reveling that he knew exactly what Im talking about.

"You know why," I told him. “Every time we are heatting up you stop before something even started.” I said and Kurt sat back, his hands far away from where they were on my body only a second ago.

"Im sorry, I didnt want to make you upset, I-” Kurt mumbled and I raised my eyebrows in surprise.

"hey...no, no.” I said, taking his hands.”Im not mad at you. Its just that the last time we talked about it you said it will happen soon and its been almost a 2 months since! I-Im just trying to understand what is stooping you...”

"nothing really, I-I want to be with you and I want us to do it but I....kind of scared....” Kurt confesses, his eyes still avoiding mine, his hand rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"If this is about you not controlling yourself and biting me, I dont even care if you do,” I admitted. I actually wanted him to, considering this is supposed to feel really good during sex...

"no, I know I wont do that,” Kurt confirmed. Well, boo.” it just that... I never actually was with anyone before....” Kurt said and I froze.

"Wait, really?”I whispered in wonder a smile spreading over my lips without me even noticing. I could have never guessed Kurt was a virgin.

"Please dont freak out but Ive only kissed once before I kissed you...”

"but your first kiss was...”I couldnt even say the name. I felt so bad with myself. How could I be so stupid and keep pushing Kurt to do something he wasnt ready for?! He has never been more intimate with someone then he had been with me, he might need more time and I have been acting like an idiot! But I really couldnt tell, my boyfriend was very attractive and I could only imagine him having a very depressed time like all immortal go through and then he went to a bar and got drunk and hooked up with some guys, considering he told me he was never in a relationship.

"Kurt, Im so sorry,” I immediately said.” I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable or anything! I really didnt mean to! I didnt know! Im so sorry-” I was cut off by Kurts lips firmly pressing against mine, pillowing me back to the mattress.” I thought us-”

"Well not now obviously, but soon enough I promise,” he said.

"Honey? There is another reason I want us to do it as soon as possible and I wont be able to live with myself if I havent told you that before anything happen.”I said, if Kurt was willing to let me in, I had to do the same, he was sacrificing for me, because I couldnt wait anymore...I had to tell him the truth.

"Did Sebastian knocked you up...?” he asked and I rolled my eyes. ”what? That the worst thing that can happen,”

"No, Im not pregnant, but it does have to do with Sebastian. If you and I sleep together, it will break Sebastian and my mating.” I said and Kurt smiled.

"Thats great, but there is something more you arent telling me,”

"well...in nature, mates dont break up, so my...lets go with body...every time Im with you, it makes me feel like Im doing something wrong and it makes me think of ...him....” I said and I felt like crying when he pulled apart from me.” thats why I called you the other day, I needed you and myself to know that I love you, and I want to be with you no matter is its acceptable or not I...please dont hate me...” I begged, not taking my hands away from Kurt.

"I dont hate you,” he whispered.” its just hard to understand that the man that you love is thinking about another guy while you are together,”

"not all the time!” okay that sounded bad.” I mean, I dont think of him, I just have a bad feeling,” that sounds even worse.” I dont know how to explain!” I said miserably, I could already see Kurt walking away from me, making sure I will never see him again.” please try to understand...”

"Im trying...” Kurt sighed and tears were shining in my eyes. ”after we do it, will it end?”

"yeah, it has to,” I said.

"then it doesnt matter.” he said.” you say that you love me and I believe you, we will stop that connection you have with Sebastian and then youll be free of all this.”

"Ill be free to be yours,” I said and the tiniest smile appeared on Kurts face.

"Dont be ridiculous.” Kurt chuckle and I smiled.

"I am not.” I said and grabbed his hand.”Im a carrier, a submissive, I need to be owned but in a good way,” I laid back on the bed and pulled Kurt on top of me.” I need somebody to take care of me and love me and hold me and kiss me and basically just pull up with me,” I said and Kurt chuckle.” and I think you will be great for the job,”

"Well thank you, thats very flattering,” Kurt said and I smiled, pressing our lips slowly together, as gentle as if it was out first kiss.

"I love you do much, Kurt, dont ever forget that.” I mumbled against his lips.

"me too, so much.” he said and kiss me again. ”we can make our now,” he said and I grinned, out still bare chests flushing together, my hands went back into Kurts already messed up hair.

"Kurt! Im home! I hope you and Blaine are fully dressed!” Elizabeths voice made us jump in surprise. We both looked at each other and laughed. No more making out that day.

The day that followed and the days after that had been really confusing for me. The thought that Kurt never had sex and Im going to be his first, hunted me. I knew that having sex will mean a lot, but now it world only mean so much more! And what if I suck at it? What if something goes wrong and he would hate me?! I started to breathe faster. It all made sense now! Sebastian kept on sleeping with other guys because I was bad in bed! Oh my god no! I was completely panicking by then.

“Amy! You better go check on him, he is freaking out again!” I heard David call from outside in the hall. I really did that a lot lately, now that I think about it.

“Got it!” I heard Amy and then there was a knock on my door.

“Come in!” I say and he does.

“What is it this time? Did you talk to Sebastian again?” she asked and sat on the bed next to me. I shook my head.

“No...kurtandIhavebenngoingtwordsexforawhilenowanditactuallysinkingiinnowandimlosingmymind!”

"Okay, a little slower now.”

"I want to sleep with Kurt but Im not sure-”

"Wow! Hold up-” Amy stops me. ”you cant have sex with him!”

"Amy...” lectures were the last thing I wanted to hear.

"Im not kidding, this can be dangerous! He can bite you or lose control and when you are in a human form he can crush you in a second!”

"Amy, dont even try backing me out of this, I already made up my mind.”

"why are you freaking out then?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I- what if wont be good enough? Maybe Sebastian cheated on me because I wasnt physically satisfying?”

"oh honey, dont worry about that, Im sure you will be fine,” she said and folded her arms over her chest.”Its him Im worried about.”

"Stop it. He wont hurt me.”

"Are you absolutely sure about this? About what you are risking? About how you feel?” she asked me.

"Look, Kurt is the most moral, compassionate soul I have ever met, he is sweet and smart and funny, did you know he doesnt even kill animals? He drink just enough so they will be able to hill after, he is understanding and caring and I will love him for eternity, and Im 100% sure he will do the same thing. ”I said honestly and something on Amys face expression changed, like she was melting inside. I knew this would happen, Amy was a sucker for love stories, and it was only a matter of time before she realizes that my love story is just as real as anybody elses.

"fine, what can I do to help?” she gave in and I smiled satisfied.

And so, Amy and I started on planning mine and Kurts perfect night, when I finally become his and he finally becomes mine and everything will be right in this world again. And if it isnt...well, the next thing that will be planned will be my funeral.

 00:00- happy six month anniversary! Cant wait for tonight ♥I love you XX-Kurt.

Is what I read on my screen after hearing my phone buzz in the middle of the night, but even though I was really tried, I smiled widely at the screen and text back quickly before the minute will be over.

 00:00-happy six month anniversary! I love you too XX-Blaine.

 And with that I dive back to my blanket. Todays gonna be the best day of my life, yeah sure its going to be nerve-racking and stressful yet exciting and great but at the end everything is going to be worth it.

Everything was already planned out, first a movie then dinner in an expansive restaurant and then going back to Kurts place, where Amy is going to set a beautiful romantic room, starting with candles and roses and ending with condoms and lube (it was a payback for what I did for her and Jeff when they had their first time over 40 years ago, oh what I had to do for her....) and then (hopefully) its gonna happen. Butterflys went through my whole body, the thought of having Kurt touching me in the most intimate places and ways, him being inside of me(ah! why did I just thought about it?!) and maybe with a little bit of luck I will convince him to bite me. Yeah, all of this is going to be perfect.

And so the night came.

It was 5:30 and I had 5 minutes before Ill have to leave to get Kurt. I checked myself in the mirror at least 10 times already. My hair was fine, with less gel than usual, the way I knew Kurt liked, and I wore a simple bottom down shirt and a fitted gray jacket and the tightest pair of pants I owned. I had to admit it, it looked good. I picked the outfit very carefully; making sure everything was easily removable. After I gave myself a pep talk I left the house, driving as fast as I could to Kurts house. As soon as I stopped the car in front of his porch, Kurt kind of flew out of the house and entered the car. I could feel my blood rushing in my ears, my heart pounding fast with excitement but I forced myself to calm down. We went to the movie; it was good, cuddling in the back row made it better besides one time when someone glanced at us with a disgusted look. All it took was one look from us to get him to back off, being monsters had it perks, and facing homophobes was easier knowing there is nothing they can do to hurt you physically.

After that we walked hand in hand to the restaurant, we ate a really good dinner (considering that it was human food,) I figured we need to eat first, to calm ourselves as much as possible so we wont end up tearing each others throats when we lose control. We had even a better time than usual; it was like the universe reminded me of why I fell in love with Kurt in the first place.

After we fought over who is gonna pay (a fight I won in, tonight was all about Kurt, Im gonna let him spoil me later.) apparently, Kurt wanted us to go back to his house later. When he told me I raised my eyebrows, how could he know? But I played along.

The drive back to Kurts house was...intense.  We both knew what was coming next, and personally, I was freaking out. I knew that I shouldnt, it isnt gonna be my first time, I already had sex countless times before in my 60 years on the planet but I still felt terrified. When I finally stopped the car, none of us moved an inch from our sits, waiting for the other to make the first move. Then I looked at Kurt, only to find him looking back at me, I nodded to his questioning eyes and we both stepped out of the car at the same time. I took Kurts hand and we walked together into his house and up to his room, Kurt locked the door behind us even though he shouldnt have. When his eyes wondered around his own room, I could see that he was surprised in a good way from all the candles and raised petals that had been scattered around. Even I had to admit it seemed like it had been taken out of a movie. Kurt looked at me.

"Who did this?” he asked breathlessly, making me smile at satisfaction.

"I asked Amy to help me; she did it while we were away.” I said.” do you like it?” I asked insecure.

"I love it,” Kurt said and turned to look me right in the eyes.” you shouldnt have bothered much, really,”

"Of course I did, I wanted everything to be perfect.” I said and stepped in front of him, resting my hand over his cheek. ”are you nervous?” I asked, our eyes never pulling away from each other. The corner of Kurts mouth curled into a small smile.

"no.” he whispered and leaned in closer, until out lips pressed together. Everything fell silence but the sounds of my breath and our beating hearts, the air was frozen and so does the rest of the world, there was only Kurt and me, no pack, no Sebastian, no blood craving, no pain, not even one regret for what Im about to do, just love. the kiss was slow and gentle at first, like it was the very first one but it quickly heat up, Kurts hands found their rightful place locked around my waist and one of my arms wrapped around Kurts shoulder. I let my tongue run over Kurts lower lip, asking for access he soon gave me, exploring my mouth in return. I tucked his shirt out of his pants and unbutton it as fast as I could, pushing it over his broad shoulders. He only wore a black tank top underneath which highlighted his porcelain skin, and now when I saw his bare neck, his scent was much clearer, causing me to kiss him more hungrily. I felt Kurts hand reaching up to remove my coat and then everything covering my torso but my undershirt that was also removed shortly after. His cool hand ran down my chest, making a shiver ran through my body.

Ive seen Kurt shirtless before, as well as he saw me, but everything was so different now. I pulled his tank over his head and pulled him even closer, both our naked chest pressing together. I ran my hand down to rest on Kurts belt buckle, getting ready to open it but I heard Kurts breathe hitch.

"You okay?” I asked against Kurts lips, I started to think he might have second thoughts but he nodded quickly and continued to kiss me. I undid his belt and pushed down his skin tight jeans. Before I even noticed Kurt pulled my pants down as well and lift me up to slid it all the way away with the rest of our clothing, the next moment I was with my back pressed to the mattress with Kurt hovering over me, our lips never breaking apart. I smiled. If Kurt was using his vampire speed, he was letting go, he was out of control, and he lost control because of me.

"sorry, I didnt mean to let go,” he whispered but I shook my head.

"no, I want you to,” he said, attacking his lips again with mine.

It only then occurred to me that we were wearing only our underwear, I could actually feel-oh god! I moan loudly as Kurt pressed his hips down, a wave of pleasure flowing through me. I pushed my hips up in need for more friction, meeting Kurts halfway. We quickly found rhythm, out kisses getting hotter and hotter. It felt so good, having Kurt that close, hearing him make those small noises, but I wanted more. My hand was already on Kurts ass but I brought it up on his boxers rubber band.” may I?” I asked and Kurt pulled away from my lips, looking down at me. His eyes were deep and dark with lash and want and his lips were swollen and pink, I couldnt even begin to describe how beautiful he looked and how lucky I felt in that very moment, I just hoped he wasnt backing out on me now because I had no idea how was I supposed to handle it. Kurts hand moved from where in rested next to my head over the pillow, his soft finders trailing over my cheeks and my jaw, then ran softly down my hair. I frozen while he did it, my eyes not leaving away from his own even for a second, the way he looked at me was a way I thought I wasnt worthy off, it made me feel so exposed but yet so very...loved. “Kurt, please do something before I explode,” I whispered and a small smile appeared on his lips before he leaned in to kiss me again, soft and tender and sweet, before he pulled my boxers away, tossing it on the floor before looking down. His smile grew bigger.

"You are perfect,” he breathed out and I could feel myself blush hard. My hand started pulling his boxers down, still hesitated but I got them down eventually, and I thought I was gonna come only by seeing Kurts impeachable form. Kurt kissed my dump lips once more, one of his hands reaching towards the night stand and pulled out a small bottle of lube and a condom. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as I heard Kurt opening the bottle of lube and poring some on his fingers. Its not like I havent done it before, but even the thought that he did it, that he wanted to prepare me first so it wont hurt for me( something that Sebastian hardly ever did), it almost brought me to tears. I felt Kurts hand over my thigh   and raise it up, I opened my eyes and I could see that he was nervous. ”tell me if it hurts, okay?” Kurt asked and I nodded. I felt one finger making its way to my entrance, pushing so very slowly past the ring of muscle. My body didnt reject the burning like pain because I already was familiar with the pleasure that was to follow.

"You can add more,” I said and Kurt obeyed. He was still nervous of course, I knew he is never gonna stop being until we finish and he will see that everything was okay, but its still didnt stop me from trying. ”you doing great, Kurt, everything is okay.” I assured him, my hand cupping his cheek as he added another one without any warning ,making me gasp but then throw my head back because he hit it. I could feel my body pressing against Kurts long fingers without my control; I just wanted him to be in me already. I took the condom from where Kurt put it and opened it up, rolling it over Kurts hard length and putting my hand on the back on his neck, crashing out lips together. We lay back on the bed, Kurts fingers no longer in me but I didnt have the time to complain before I felt the tip of his cock against my entrance. I made my muscles relax as Kurt staidly and slowly pushed himself inside. And then everything changed. Everything was Kurt, suddenly, it was like the part of my heart that was Sebastians had vanished away only to be replaced by the piece I already gave to Kurt. and then I just knew...ever since the very beginning, maybe even before I was in this world, my destiny was Kurt. I had been him all along, maybe life are cruel and wanted to punish me for something so they kept him away from me for all this time but none of this mattered now because he was here, and we were together and it was just....worth it. Suddenly, in between the hot kissing and moans and strong trusts, Kurts mouth reaped away from my own, but he kept kissing me, my jaw down to my neck, behind my ear and all the way to where my neck met my shoulder, he kissed there slowly before he bit down, hard enough for his fangs to go into my skin, drawing blood right into his mouth. I moan louder and trust my hips harder into Kurts cock, my hands digging into his hair as he drank from me. I didnt even worry for a second that he might never pull away, not until I die, all I cared about was what was going on here and now. His hips rocked faster, one of his hands wrapping around my own cock, stroking it fast in a match rhythm with his trusts until the heat in my stomach was unbearable and I came, the hardest I ever came in my life. Kurt pulled away from my throat and licked the wound so it will heal quicker and gave one last trust before coming as well. Both exhausted and heavily breathing we clasped back, out whole body shuddered as we tried to calm down. My eyes started to drift close so I looked over at Kurt, only to find that he was staring at me too. His hand rested on my cheek as he brought me closer to a soft kiss, before wrapping his hand around my waist and embracing me.

"I love you,” he whispered into my hair and brought the covers over out naked bodies.

"me too,” I said with a broad smile, burying my head in Kurts chest.

Best. Night. Ever.