It wasn’t until the next week when Blaine could finally see his boyfriend again. His mother had been very strict with guests after the surgery and Kurt still held the distance. They called each other every evening and texted once in a while, but that was it. The Valentine’s day rolled around and it became physically hard to stay away from Kurt. Finally, the doctor allowed him to return to school and Blaine appeared to Sugar’s party.

The distance was gone immediately, everything felt normal between them again, or maybe even better than normal. They danced together for the whole night; no one even seemed to have a problem with them sharing some light kisses.

“How’s your eye?” Kurt finally asked while they danced slowly on the mostly empty dance floor.

“Doctor said it’s fine now, nothing to worry about.”

Blaine could see a relief in Kurt’s smile, but still something sad in his eyes.

“You okay?” Blaine decided to ask carefully after a short silence.

Kurt bit his lip and nodded but didn’t look really convincing.

“I, uhm..” the boy mumbled then. “received some.. cards. From secret admirer.” Blaine’s heart skipped a beat to that. They stopped the slow swinging; Blaine looked at Kurt with confusion, probably also with a fear.  “They were from Karofsky.”

“Karofsky?!” Blaine almost exhaled with disbelieve and took a step back. “The same guy who bullied you and then attacked you with a.. kiss?!”

“Yeah,” Kurt sighed and pulled Blaine close again so they started to rock with the slow melody again. “He came here before the party and told me that he loves me but I told him that I’m with you and god, he looked so broken when he walked out..” Kurt’s voice broke and few tears ran down his cheek. “He got rejected and I know exactly how it feels like, but now I’m the one who did this to him..”

Blaine didn’t let him continue and pulled him to his arms, squeezing his thin body probably a little too tightly.

“Kurt, you didn’t do anything wrong,” he said quietly into Kurt’s ear. “We all go through some broken hearts, we can’t help it.”

“Yeah, but..”

“No ‘but’s, Kurt. It’s another part of life and you did the right thing.” Blaine let go of Kurt then, realizing something that terrified him the most. “Unless.. your feelings with Karofsky are mutual..”

“What? No!” Kurt answered quickly and Blaine breathed out the breath he didn’t even know he was holding. “No, Blaine, I love you. Karofsky doesn’t change that.”

Blaine simply nodded and linked their hands as he moved closer to his face.

“Then you did nothing wrong, don’t beat yourself up for this, okay?”

Kurt nodded back and smiled lightly once again. They stayed like this for a while: standing in the middle of the empty dance floor, holding each other’s hands and faces so close, not so far away from the kiss that didn’t happen.

“I’ve decided to audition,” Kurt stated then. It took a second for Blaine to react.

“You’re not doing this for me, aren’t you?” he questioned.

Kurt paused for a second and looked at Blaine thoughtfully. For a second, Blaine got scared, but then Kurt answered with full confident: “No, I’m doing this for myself.”

“Then I’m happy for you.“

A bright smile appeared on Blaine’s face and he finally leaned to kiss tenderly his boyfriend’s lips.

No one could’ve expected what came next week. No one couldn’t expect Karofsky’s suicide attempt. And no one wasn’t so upset as Kurt.

Blaine held him for hours that day after they had heard the news. He rocked him and stroked his back while bitter tears ran down his own cheeks as well. He didn’t even know Karofsky, Blaine had never met the guy but it was horrible in so many levels. It hurt because people had taken Karofsky to this far because of his sexuality. It hurt because Blaine couldn’t imagine the agony that Karodsky was probably in. It hurt because it hurt Kurt so badly that he couldn’t stop weeping and crying for hours until he got tired and fell asleep on Blaine’s arms.

“Do you think, you could stay the night?” Burt asked when Blaine had tucked Kurt in between soft sheets. “Kurt needs you right now.”

Blaine couldn’t really believe Burt’s words at first but eventually it made sense, he didn’t want to leave Kurt neither. He called to his mother, explained the situation and asked her to bring some clothes. He woke Kurt up for a light dinner, then they both changed into pajamas and quietly crawled under the blanket.

Just when Blaine thought that Kurt had fallen asleep again, he felt a silent mumble against his chest where Kurt’s head was resting.

“I thought about it,” Kurt uttered. Blaine was confused at first but then Kurt continued: “About suicide, just before I met you.”

Blaine swallowed, hard, feeling his chest getting heavier and heavier under Kurt’s head. He was just about to open his mouth to say anything, not even sure what, when Kurt’s voice cut him off again.

“I never really thought about attempting but I thought about how it would feel like. I thought about cutting and harming and suicide but I stopped myself with thinking about my dad and what it would do to him..”

“Kurt,” Blaine growled because that was the only thing he could get out of his lungs. “Oh god, Kurt.”

Kurt shifted himself off from Blaine’s chest and put his head right next to Blaine’s, so Blaine could see the hurt in his eyes.

“I haven’t told it to anybody,” he confessed with a weep and Blaine could feel his own tears building up. “And right now, it seems stupid, because I still had my family and friends but I was the one who pushed them away.”

“Stop, stop it right now,” Blaine ordered then. “It’s not stupid, you were broken. Stop blaming yourself.” He almost pleaded, he couldn’t really say why. Maybe it was because he was tired, maybe he just felt hopeless because he didn’t know how to help Kurt anymore. For a second he imagined what it would’ve done to Burt, what would his own life be without Kurt but he quickly forbid himself to think about it.  So he did what he knew that almost always helped: he pulled Kurt closer again and tried to show how much he cared about him, that he wasn’t alone with actions.

“I’m sorry,” Kurt said then like he had been hearing Blaine’s thoughts. “I’m a wreck.”

“It’s okay, not your fault.”

“Thank you,” he sighed to that. “For staying, for being here.”

“I could never leave,” Blaine answered shakily and stroked Kurt’s right cheek. They just looked at each other silently while few other tears tripped down from both of their eyes before falling asleep for a while.

Kurt woke up twice in that night and Blaine calmed his weeps down. In the morning, Kurt insisted on going to school although Burt had suggested staying home. The rest of the week was hard as well, especially when Blaine couldn’t stay with Kurt for the night anymore. Even though Kurt assured him that he was better now, Blaine still couldn’t help but worry.

They were busy with Regional practice and the drama that Rachel and Finn’s marriage had brought in. Kurt visited Karofsky in the hospital while Blaine waited outside. Kurt’s eyes were still swallowed and red but he looked stronger, more peaceful after the visit. Blaine also had to face Sebastian again which made a week even more tiring.

No one expected the news that Rachel and Finn are going to marry right after the competition. And no one expected Quinn’s car accident that cut the their plans.

Their lives calmed down when March rolled around. Although everybody were sad and confused about Quinn, Blaine could see the rest in Kurt’s actions: he had stopped crying after few weeks and it seemed that he finally got some sleep. They even went to a lovely date on Blaine’s birthday to Breadstix and Burt and Blaine’s parents were fine with Kurt staying the night. The spent the whole night kissing and making love because they both had missed the closeness: it had been weeks since they got to do that. These were rough weeks that were finally over now.

There was another rough week for Blaine in April when Cooper visited him. Blaine couldn’t get a picture of Kurt’s face out of his head when he first saw Cooper and although this week was mostly about him and Cooper, he couldn’t help but feel a little rusty around Kurt.

“So, tell me, we’ve been dating for a while now. Why did you never mentioned the fact that your brother is Cooper Anderson?” Kurt asked at the end of the week when Cooper had flown back to Los Angeles and they could finally have Blaine’s house to themselves again. It was a quiet and comfortable evening where they just enjoyed each other’s company.

Blaine didn’t answer right away, simply because he didn’t know what to say. He just raised his head and looked into his boyfriend’s eyes.

“I’m jealous, I guess,” he confessed then.

“Jealous of what exactly?” Kurt inquired with a frown.

“Jealous of Cooper’s life, his fame and great looks. I mean, you got all this smitten face when you saw him and I can’t even blame you.”

Kurt blinked blankly few times and then snorted. He actually snorted and laughed.

“Okay, first of all, as wonderful as his life seems, I’m pretty sure it isn’t twice as great as he claims it to be,” Kurt said. “Secondly, his so called fame is there only because of his smile. And yes, he looks handsome but so do you. I wasn’t smitten, you idiot.”

A warm and soft feeling weighted down on Blaine’s stomach. He missed it: he didn’t just miss the intimacy with Kurt in those rough weeks but he also missed the laugh and lightness between them.

“You so were smitten; admit it,” Blaine uttered and shifted himself on the top of Kurt. “He looks better than me, we both know it.”

“What the hell makes you think that?” Kurt asked.

“Well, first of all, he isn’t a hobbit like me,” Blaine answered but couldn’t get to continue because Kurt started laughing even harder than before. “What?! Stop it!” he pleaded with a high voice.

“Oh, god, you’re adorable,” Kurt sighed when he calmed down just a little.

“Well, it bothers me sometimes that you are shorter than me, okay?” he confessed with a blush.

“You’re ridiculous,” Kurt spoke and shifted himself up. With one simple move, Blaine was back on his back and Kurt on top of him instead. “You’re so ridiculous that it makes me fall in love with you even more.”

They grinned to each other widely, looking more smitten to each other than ever before.

“I love you too,” was all that Blaine could say before Kurt leaned into the soft and simple kiss that quickly turned into something more