The Source of our Power
Chazzam
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The Source of our Power: Chapter 5


E - Words: 4,500 - Last Updated: Aug 12, 2012
Story: Complete - Chapters: 18/18 - Created: Aug 31, 2011 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022
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Author's Notes: Aaah...so I feel like I may need to slide in an additional warning, but I'm not quite sure how to phrase it succinctly. There are no noncon scenes in this fic, BUT. I do have to warn for evil creatures being creepy and unsettling, I suppose, and sometimes saying and doing offensive things with a strong sexual edge to them that might trigger some folks.I hope that covers it. You have been warned.

The Source of Our Power: Chapter 5


Blaine did his best to keep his eyes trained on the blond vampire even as another emerged from around the corner of the wall, trailing the limp form of a stocky female guard by the shoulder and licking blood off her fingers.

This second vampire – Tina, Blaine supposed, glanced at him, her face breaking into a wide grin. She flung her victim to the ground and approached them.

Tina looked much more like Blaine's idea of a vampire than the blonde one did. Even though it been drilled into him for the past three years that most vampires looked like everyday people, he had never gotten an image very like Tina out of his head.

She had long black hair that moved like liquid and wore dramatic makeup, though her black lipstick was caked with blood. Her clothes were all burgundy and black and velvet and lace, swishing around her fishnet-clad wrists and high-heeled boots while hugging her curves ruthlessly. She had beautiful cleavage, and a large and complicated pewter pendant hung from a black silk choker around her neck. Blaine was fairly certain that she would be wearing a large gothic cross instead if it wouldn't burn her flesh.

She was small, Asian and very pretty, and could probably look like one of the cutest creatures on the planet if she so desired. She and the blond vampire had that in common, and Blaine was entirely aware of just how dangerous that made them.

"Well what do we have here?" She asked in a delighted voice. "I had hoped you'd gotten ahold of the Slayer, Quinn, but he looks much tastier."

"Doesn't he, though?" Quinn asked, flashing Blaine a dark and flirtatious smile. "Unusually strong, though. I'm not sure what that's about."

Tina rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. He's barely enough for an appetizer. Don't tell me they got you with one of those tranquilizer darts, Quinny. Weakness is a bad look for you."

"I am not weak," Quinn snarled, wrenching her arm away from Blaine pointedly.

"Well then come on. If we're going to eat him, we'd better be fast. The Slayer is bound to show up any minute."

"Um, excuse me?"

"What?" both women snapped, turning to him. "You know, I think I have to disagree with what you said earlier, Quinn," Tina added. "They're much more adorable when they don't talk."

Blaine spared the two of them a brief, cold smile. "You're not going to eat me. If you try, it will end badly for you. So I suggest you just- hey!"

Blaine reached out just in time to grab Tina by the hair and roughly pull her away from his neck as she lunged toward him. He twisted his fist tighter and drew his arm back fast before throwing her forward so hard that she went airborne, screaming with pain. Before Tina had even hit the ground, Blaine whirled around to block a kick from Quinn, but failed to avoid a powerful uppercut to his jaw that sent him sprawling.

It was the kind of punch that would have seriously damaged a normal person. But Blaine Anderson was not a normal boy anymore. That time had long since passed.

It hurt, but it didn't really damage him. It did, however, really piss him off.

Blaine rolled onto his back and only got so far as propping himself on his elbows before Quinn was standing above him, feet on either side of his thighs, her mask of sweetness twisted into full-on vamp face.

"What the fuck are you?" She demanded.

"The person that's going to kill you," Blaine snapped before scissoring his legs outward, causing Quinn to stumble slightly. Blaine took advantage of this slim window of opportunity by grabbing her around the thighs and throwing her over his head. He allowed his body to follow the momentum, letting her go just in time to get his arms underneath himself and then push off in a handspring.

Blaine had less than a second to orient himself before he was blocking an attempted blow from Tina. Tina swore and paused just long enough to rip a long slit in her skirts, freeing her legs enough to kick Blaine hard in the gut with the pointed toe of her boot.

Blaine fell backward with a grunt, the wind knocked out of him. Just as he moved to get up, another foot landed squarely on his abdomen, and he found himself slammed back to the ground by one of Quinn's tasteful slate-colored pumps, the wide heel grinding down enough to restrict his ability to breathe. Blaine struggled briefly before Tina joined her, resting the stiletto heel of her boot gently on his groin.

Why the fuck hadn't he worn a cup? That should have been part of his Introduction to Slayer Safety class, for sure.

And perhaps it would have been if any other Slayer in the history of the world had needed to use one.

"All right," Quinn said softly with a radiant smile. Her face was back to its innocent china-doll perfection. "Now I believe I asked you a question, my darling boy. What. The. Fuck. Are. You. Tell me now, please. I get bored very quickly."

Blaine struggled to respond, if only with a fuck you, but he couldn't get the words out with Quinn's foot pressed into his chest like that.

Quinn laughed like a delicate chain of silver bells and eased the pressure on Blaine's chest slightly. He couldn't help but gasp loudly for lungfuls of air, but he was pretty sure he still couldn't really speak.

"Hey," Tina said suddenly. "Quinn, look." Quinn followed Tina's gaze to the broken walkie-talkie that had long since fallen from Blaine's belt.

Quinn looked back at her. "Is that...?"

"It has to be."

"But we heard a boy's voice. I thought it was the Summers boy, but..."

Both women studied him. Blaine didn't move a muscle. He didn't want to die but he really didn't want to lose his dick either.

Tina's mouth curled into a slight sneer. "He could be that boy Slayer."

Quinn laughed again, looking genuinely amused. "Really. Is that true, love? Are you a little Slayer boy?"

Blaine simply glared at them.

"Well." Quinn cocked her head slightly and brought a hand up to stroke her chin. "I have to admit, I pretty much wrote you off when I heard about you. I figured you were some scheme cooked up by one demon or another and you'd just destroy the Council from within for us if...well, if someone else didn't do it for us. But here you are, cute as a button, patrolling for werewolves and fighting vampires like a big boy for the little Watcher that could. It almost warms my heart. It probably would, if it was still beating." She glanced over at Tina.

"I call inner left thigh," Tina said quickly. Quinn raised an eyebrow at her. "Well, look at him," Tina defended, coming as close to a blush as she was probably able. "I mean, I never really got the Slayer fetish before, but their blood is supposed to be like sex. And he's hot. And he looks like he might be Eurasian."

Quinn smirked. "All right, I call neck then. We should probably do this fast before Dave gets back with our little friend. If he finds out we have a hot boy Slayer, you and I probably won't get a drop to share between us."

Blaine was on the very verge of deciding fuck my dick, what has it done for me lately anyway, when he heard a quick whoosh of air and Quinn jumped back from him with a noise of surprise. He gasped at the lack of pressure and swiveled his head to look at her. She stood with her fingers wrapped around a long, slender wooden arrow that was just millimeters from piercing into her heart.

Another whoosh and Tina dove for the ground as a second arrow sailed above him.

"All right, whoever you are, you just made a very big mis-" Quinn cut herself off by diving to the ground to join Tina as another arrow appeared, expertly aimed right at her heart.

"Fuck," Tina hissed, sounding more irritated than anything. "Did you bring a real Slayer with you too?"

"Hey!" Blaine was indignant. "I am a real Slayer, thank you very much. And that wasn't over. I could have turned that whole situation around just fine if I'd gotten the chance!"

"You tell them, Blaine!" Came a very loud and very distinct voice from a dark grove of trees off to the left.

Blaine's eyes widened and then he fell back to the ground with a groan. "Okay fine, kill me."

Another arrow flew at the group, aimed with such precision that Tina had to literally roll away to avoid getting hit.

"Fuck this," Quinn snarled. "Let's just find Dave and the Summers kid and get the hell out of here."

She leapt to her feet and took off at an incredible speed, Tina close at her heels.

"No," Blaine protested weakly. "Come back. Just...sex blood, remember? And I am Eurasian, I swear!"

He sighed deeply as the two vampires disappeared from view. This night could not get any worse. Of all the people to witness his failure, to save his life and thus demand a reasonable degree of gratitude-

No. Blaine seriously could not handle this.

He threw an arm over his eyes, as if blocking his vision would somehow reset reality.

She approached quickly, deftly, and in perfect silence. Of course.

He heard a deep, condescending sigh from above him.

"Oh, Blaine," Rachel Berry said without even attempting to keep the smugness out of her voice. "What would you ever do without me?"


It was several moments before Kurt could even speak. He clutched the tranq gun that Blaine had left in his lap so hard his knuckles turned white.

"K-Karofsy," he finally managed. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Dave shrugged, still smiling up at Kurt. His eyes were far too intense.

There was definitely something off about him.

"Just taking an evening stroll, Hummel. Kurt. I think I'd rather call you Kurt. It feels more...intimate."

Kurt couldn't suppress a shudder.

And the shudder turned into a gasp when Dave started to scale the tree.

"W-what are you doing?" Kurt squeaked, and suddenly he was sixteen again. He was no longer the man who sought out and faced beings of pure malevolence. He was no longer skilled with weapons or quick on his feet. He was sixteen and small and alone and absolutely petrified.

"Just coming up to say hi. Geez, Kurt, relax. No need to get your panties in a twist."

"You don't need to come up here," Kurt said quickly. "I can hear you just fine from down there."

Dave simply chuckled and continued to climb. Kurt cocked the tranquilizer gun.

Dave looked offended and possibly even a little hurt, but not particularly intimidated by the action. "Now, why would you want to point that thing at me, Hum-Kurt? Are you still hung up on that shit from high school? Because that was a lifetime ago." Dave settled on a branch next to Kurt's, and it seemed like he had gotten there unnaturally fast. Dave looked him in the eye and smiled again.

"Trust me, Kurt, I've changed."

If it took longer than it should have for Kurt to figure it out, it was because fear had eclipsed all rational thought. Being the son of two Watchers, Kurt couldn't even remember when he'd been in the presence of his first vampire. It had probably been before he was old enough to walk.

He knew what to look for. He knew all the signs.

Dave leaned forward, his bulky form perched on a slim branch with an unnatural level of grace.

"Fuck, you look good. I mean, you were hot in high school, Kurt, don't get me wrong, but now?"

Dave leaned closer, his eyes glued to the tendons of Kurt's long, pale neck. He groaned and actually adjusted his crotch. Kurt stared at him in horror.

"Now, Kurt..." Dave continued, his face close enough for Kurt to feel the breath on his face. Only there was no breath to feel.

"Now you look fucking delicious."

Kurt screamed.


Blaine was on the very verge of asking Rachel what she was doing there and how she had found him when he heard Kurt's scream.

Blaine leapt to his feet and was racing toward him before Kurt's voice had even faded. Rachel had begun some sort of monologue about her slaying prowess when Blaine bolted, and he could hear an offended "hey!" behind him before she was on his heels.

"Blaine! Slow down! You should really let me go ahead of you, this could be quite dangerous and I frankly think you're better suited to back me up right now. After all, I have been training with William Schuester for the past year and a half, and as you know he is the-" most well-respected Watcher in Affiliated States, Blaine said along with her in his head. He had heard this spiel at least fifty times after Rachel had gotten her letter from Scheuster. The fact that she really was as good as she thought only served to make her more infuriating.

"Blaine!" Rachel shrieked, and Blaine couldn't help but flinch, though he didn't break stride.

"Rachel, shut up. I think they've got my Watcher!"

"They've got Kurt?" Rachel sounded genuinely upset. Blaine hadn't even realized that Rachel knew Kurt. "But surely Kurt can hold them off until we form a strategic-"

"He's hurt. He can't even walk. I left him alone in a tree with nothing but a goddamn tranquilizer gun."

Rachel was actually quiet for a moment. "That wasn't very smart, Blaine," she finally said.

"I know!" Blaine roared at her, his frustration mounting. "I thought we would just be dealing with werewolves tonight!"

Even as she sped up to run alongside him, Rachel managed a loud, dramatic sigh. "You can never make assumptions like that, Blaine. The Slayer handbook clearly states-"

"Fuck the Slayer handbook!" Blaine screamed. He knew he should probably be a little kinder, seeing as how Rachel had just saved his life, but all he could think about was Kurt. Kurt could be dead already, and it was all Blaine's fault. Having Rachel Berry point that out to him really wasn't helping one bit.

Blaine heard Kurt scream again, and as horrible as it was to hear, it made Blaine's heart flood with relief. Maybe they weren't too late after all.

There was a low murmur of arguing voices in the direction of Kurt's tree, and as they got closer they saw the unmistakable forms of Quinn and Tina standing on the ground. They were looking up at the tree, and Blaine could hear a deep, masculine voice coming from the branches.

Yeah, that was definitely not Kurt.

"Blaine!" Rachel hissed.

"Not now, Rachel, they-"

"No. Stop." She surged forward and twirled slightly, coming to a stop in front of him. She held out a firm hand and then reached out her other arm to catch him when he smacked into it and started to fall.

"Blaine, I know you're worried about Kurt, and please believe me, I am too. But if we rush in there all keyed up and without a basic plan, we are going to get ourselves – and Kurt – killed. Now, I need you to listen to me. Are you listening?"

Blaine stared at her defiantly, but said nothing. Enragingly, she sounded like she knew what she was talking about. Finally he forced himself to nod.

"Good. Is that the tree where you left Kurt?"

Blaine nodded again.

"All right. That's good, actually. I have a pretty clear shot from here." Blaine looked at her more closely and for the first time properly registered her crossbow and the drawstring quiver of slender wooden arrows on her back. "I think Kurt is probably still up there but he isn't alone. If I distract those two, you can move around to the other side of the tree and climb up."

Blaine sighed. "Thank you, Rachel," he muttered softly. He could worry about his pride later. Right now, Rachel Berry was exactly what she'd always said she would be at Slayer school.

She was a star.

Rachel's overbearing expression softened, and she gave Blaine's arm a brief squeeze. "Happy to help. Now go get our boy."

Blaine smiled at her and then crept back into the shadows of a dense grove of trees. Slowly and soundlessly he moved around the periphery so that he could get to the tree unnoticed.

As he got closer, Blaine became aware of a sound other than the voices of the two vampires on the ground and who he presumed was a third in the tree. He wasn't sure what it was until he got a bit closer, and he caught a beam of moonlight shining through a gap in the foliage. It illuminated Kurt, still alive, but sobbing. His arms were wrapped tightly around himself and his eyes looked stricken and almost blank with shock. He was shaking, and there was a large man – a large vampire – holding Kurt in his lap. The vampire was looking at him with something almost like affection, and Blaine had never seen Kurt like this. He looked wrecked and unraveled and utterly lost. The calm iciness that Blaine had come to associate with Kurt was nowhere to be found. He looked like nothing more or less than a frightened child.

Blaine almost froze as he felt himself consumed with a tidal wave of protectiveness and rage. Something was not right here. Something far more than the things that were usually not right when vampires were involved.

Blaine forced himself to remain steady as he continued to move forward.

"Dave," Quinn was saying impatiently, "Get him down here. I think there's another Slayer around besides the boy wonder, and-" she glanced sidelong at Tina- "the boss will be very upset with us if we let him slip through our fingers."

"No," the vampire in the tree – Dave – replied stubbornly. "You said I could keep him, You said, Quinn-"

"I'm sure you can still have him after the ritual," Quinn answered with exaggerated patience. "But first we need to get him to-"

"They're going to bleed him, though!" Dave sounded nearly hysterical. "There won't be any left, and I won't be able to turn him. You just said so, Quinn."

Kurt whimpered.

"Yeah," Tina added, glaring at Quinn with unmasked irritation. "You did, didn't you. Smart move, there, Lucy."

"Don't you dare call me that," Quinn spat. "Look, Dave, we don't have time for this. I'll make sure they leave enough for you to turn him after-"

"Don't fucking bullshit me!" Dave bellowed. "I should just fucking eat him right now. Fuck you and your damn ritual, I don't even care what it changes! All I want is him." Dave placed a hand on Kurt's cheek and turned Kurt's face toward him.

"All I've ever wanted was him," he said against Kurt's lips.

Kurt blinked and looked like he was coming out of a trance, and began to thrash and scream and struggle. Dave's grip didn't loosen in the slightest.

Blaine couldn't stand another second of it. He ran.

Luckily, Rachel seemed to realize that things had just escalated, and at that precise moment the first arrow appeared. Tina moved just in time to avoid getting stabbed in the heart, but the arrow made contact and embedded itself deeply into her shoulder.

"Fuck!" She screamed. "That hurt!"

Quinn moved out of the way just in time to avoid a second arrow, and it sunk into the bark of the oak tree.

"All right, that's it, you little bitch, whoever you are. Come and fight like a woman, why don't you?"

Blaine could hear a peal of laughter from where Rachel stood. "I thought that's what I was doing. Too much for you?"

There were a few more arrows, all of which barely missed Quinn and Tina, before Rachel was striding out into the clearing with an air of complete confidence. She reached into her hair and pulled out a stake, sending her long chocolate-colored hair tumbling down her shoulders.

"Quinn," she said, smiling at the blonde. "Tina. Hello. My name is Rachel Berry and as much fun as that was, rehearsal is officially over. I'm going to kill you now."

Before either vampire could so much as formulate a retort, Rachel managed to kick Quinn hard in the chest at the perfect angle to send her flying into Tina. Both women hit the ground.

Tina glared up at her. "Oh, game on, midget," she snarled, before lunging at Rachel.

Under different circumstances, Blaine wouldn't have been able to take his eyes off the sight of Rachel in battle. She had been very good while in school, but her time with Will Scheuster had obviously not been wasted. She had gone from very good to superb.

But at the moment all Blaine could focus on was his Watcher and the vampire that was holding him captive.

Blaine managed to reach the base of the tree without catching Dave's attention. Dave looked a bit lost in thought, like he was considering his options.

"Well, Hummel, what do you say?" Dave asked, stroking up and down Kurt's neck with the backs of his fingers. He chuckled to himself. "Sorry, Kurt. I have to remember that. If we're going to be together forever I can't keep calling you Hummel, can I?"

"Just kill me," Kurt pleaded. His voice was barely more than a whisper.

"Don't worry, baby, I will," Dave cooed. "You don't know how long I've wanted to taste you. I've eaten lots of boys, but I'm always thinking of you, Kurt. Always pretending it's you. And now...finally I can stop pretending."

"Don't turn me," Kurt whimpered. "Please don't turn me. Just kill me. I don't want to come back. I don't want to be with you."

"That will change," Dave said, the mock-sweetness of his voice taking on a hard edge. "Trust me, Hummel, you'll want me." Dave moved his lips to the shell of Kurt's ear. "You won't have a choice."

Blaine had launched himself up the tree, and was now hovering less than ten feet above Dave and Kurt. He bit his lip, considering. He really wasn't sure quite how to get Kurt safe and away from Dave.

Until Dave wrapped his meaty hand around Kurt's chin, forced his head back, and bit into his throat with a wanton growl.

Kurt howled in pain. Blaine stopped thinking.

Leaping down to the thick branch that supported both Dave and Kurt's weight, Blaine grabbed Kurt's bicep with one hand and reached upward, catching hold of a branch just above them and taking advantage of Dave's preoccupied state. Dave was so focused on Kurt that he didn't look up until Blaine's legs were swinging at him, smashing square into his face. Dave screamed, his hands automatically flying to his face, and Blaine took the opportunity to wrench Kurt away from him completely.

Kurt gave a tormented scream, and Blaine was fairly certain that he had dislocated his Watcher's shoulder. But he couldn't worry about that now. Shoulders could be fixed. Death was permanent.

Blaine slung Kurt over his shoulder and then braced himself with the branch above them again. Just as Dave started to get his bearings back, Blaine swung his body around so that both feet landed squarely against Dave's side with enough force to push him off the branch.

Dave went tumbling to the ground below.

Blaine could feel Kurt's warm blood dripping onto his back and soaking into his shirt. He continued to cry softly as he hung limply against Blaine. Blaine closed his eyes and breathed. He knew Rachel needed help. He knew he needed to keep Kurt safe.

He wasn't sure what to do.

He started by climbing back down the tree.

On the ground, Rachel still seemed to be holding her own. Dave was lying dazed, and Tina was looking far worse for wear. Quinn's eyes were taking in the scene wildly, a look of mounting panic on her face.

Blaine located a reasonably sharp-looking partial branch jutting out from the tree and broke it off. He wrapped his left arm firmly around Kurt's legs, and held the makeshift stake in his right.

Just holding the stake made him feel so much calmer. It felt like power and safety and authority. It cleared his mind, and allowed him to realize that he was going to get through this. Even one-handed, he could fight. It was what he was made for. At the end of the day, he wasn't just a Slayer. First and foremost, he was a Vampire Slayer.

He locked eyes with Quinn, and something there seemed to decide it for her.

"Retreat!" She barked. "Come on, let's get out of here!"

"But what about-" Tina was gesturing to Kurt.

"Later," Quinn snapped, planting a kick to Rachel's stomach. She smiled slightly. "We know where to find him now and we know who his Slayer is. Don't worry, Tina, we'll get him. And in the meantime, we can just go after everyone he loves." Her eyes narrowed and her smile turned cold as ice. "Again."

Kurt stirred at that, struggling against Blaine and making strangled noises that weren't quite words.

Quinn and Tina ran off into the night, cruel laughter ringing in their wake. Dave stood up and shook his head, still looking slightly dazed. He spotted Blaine and started toward him before noticing the stake in his hand. And then he noticed the stake in Rachel's. He seemed to think for a moment before bolting in the direction of the two women. Blaine could faintly hear him yelling "wait for me!" as his footsteps receded.

Blaine knelt to the ground and put Kurt down gently. Kurt immediately curled into a ball, rocking back and forth, tears streaming down his face.

"Rachel..." Blaine looked up at her. "Do you have a car? I just have my bike, and I don't think Kurt is in any state to..."

Rachel was kneeling over a slumped figure on the ground. She looked up. "I do, actually. I'd be happy to give you a ride home." She looked back down at the figure. It was the werewolf Blaine had shot with the tranq gun maybe an hour or two ago. It felt like it had been weeks.

"We should get this one back to the enclave first, though."

Blaine nodded. Rachel slung the wolf over her shoulder like it weighed as much as a puppy, and Blaine picked Kurt up gingerly and carried him bridal-style. He had been slightly afraid that Kurt would resist, and the best case scenario was that he would just go limp again. To Blaine's surprise, however, he snuggled into his chest and reached his uninjured arm up to rest on Blaine's shoulder. Blaine looked down and Kurt looked up at him, his wide blue eyes bloodshot and puffy.

"Thank you," Kurt whispered. He continued to gaze at Blaine for a long moment before closing his eyes.

Blaine bit his lip and fought back his own tears. A million things raced through his mind; I'm sorry, I never should have let that happen to you, this is all my fault, I'm the worst Slayer in the world. But he knew Kurt didn't have the energy to reassure him, so he just held him closer.

Kurt was so warm.

"You're safe now," was what Blaine finally settled on.

But he knew it would never be true.


Comments

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I need the next chapter like I need oxygen!

GUH. I am so addicted to this fic, it's not even funny. I cannot believe the genius- Klaine meets Buffy!verse. Absolutely brilliant.

I don't know what to say. Chazzam, you are absolutely incredible. You've taken a verse that has been such a huge part of my life (Buffy) and put this verse that is currently changing my life (Glee) and mashed them together so perfectly well that I cannot believe how lucky I am to read something that exists so perfectly. I've never been one with words but if I sound speechless here that's because I am. You never cease to amaze me. I still remember reading The Sidhe and feeling sorry for the people who weren't part of the Klaine fandom because they had no idea what they were missing and then you created this and I was tentative at first because it's BUFFY and it's GLEE and i feel it personally when fandoms I'm so heavily invested in get dabbed into the world of fanfiction but you've created this so ( I can't even find the right words for it). I love it, I love it so much. I love the action and the suspense and the drama and the romance and the build up and the plot lines and everything just everything. I'm just scared to keep reading it because I don't think I can stand waiting for the rest of it. You've even got me wanting to start fanart again which is something I have not done for a LONG time and never worked on any glee stuff before. I considered it when reading The Sidhe but I never really thought I was any good but ugh. There's this magic in this story and it's taken over me and it's all I can think about. I follow your posts religiously on tumblr (im a basket case for doing so, I know) but you're amazing and I just can't help it. Would you consider getting anything original published? Cos I swear to all beings holy I would pay money to have your books. Honestly. Wow. I am so inspired by your work and very, very impressed. Can I live in your brain? Pretty please? I promise not to destroy anything, I just want to live in the images you've created in my mind for all eternity. My girlfriend will probably kill me but she knows what a gleek I am so no harm done :) I don't know what else to say except thank you a million times over for writing this. I cannot wait to have the whole thing printed out so I can devour it at my leisure any chance I get. Don't ever stop writing this because I will never stop reading this. Any time you need a pick me up or anything I'm your bitch I swear... I am forever indebted to you for writing something so remarkable. Forever.....