Oct. 4, 2014, 7 p.m.
Courage: Into the Open Air
E - Words: 9,784 - Last Updated: Oct 04, 2014 Story: Complete - Chapters: 51/? - Created: Jul 19, 2014 - Updated: Jul 19, 2014 207 0 0 0 0
"Why do you hurt your hands?" The words echoed in tuned out ears that heard nothing but the howling of wind and the rustling of grass. His wide eyes flicked to every snapping twig and each light that swung over the road from the passing cars. With every movement from outside, his hard shoulders tensed up and his screwed up face looked almost pained. Kurt worried that the harm of his clawing fingers was making him wear those expressions. Hed looked like that for every second that hed been there, sitting and waiting for something that Kurt didnt know about to happen, but with every hour that ticked by, his golden eyes dulled with exhaustion. Blaine was tired, and Kurt wondered if it wasnt just sleepiness that had him so weary. "Blaine." He tried, his voice a soft squeak, but, once again, his words fell on empty ears. "Blaine, you must let go of your hands. Youll cut them."
Those nails kept slashing, digging deeper into the raw skin with each swipe across his palm. Kurt looked down at those clenched fists, curled up so tightly that the knuckles had turned as white as snow. Holding his hand out for one of those fists, Kurt brushed his fingers across Blaines wrist, but he quickly jerked back when Blaine suddenly snapped out of his trance. He whipped around, revealing a tight jaw and furrowed brows. The flinch on his face was obvious, as if hed imagined that he was going to be hit, but he hadnt raised those fists to protect himself. That crumpled face softened as he glanced over Kurt, and he rocked back on his heels. "Youve been like this for a very long time." Kurt said very quietly, catching the way Blaines eyes snapped back over to the window when a nearby tree branch tapped on the window.
Blaine said nothing for what felt like a long time, his knowing eyes so confused and frightened. That scared expression on his face finally changed when the burn in his palms irritated him, and he lifted his hands and squeezed them as if he was trying to stifle the ache. He gritted his teeth in his determination to ignore his wound. "Will you let me soap the cuts?" Kurt asked, getting nothing but an aggravated look from Blaine. His expression quickly became helpless, his mouth falling open and his eyes widening. Kurt had never seen Blaine look like that before, as if he knew he was about to be eaten by a monster but could do nothing about it. "Are you sad because they were mean to you?" Blaines brows lowered as if he was trying to understand what Kurt was saying, like they were speaking two different languages.
His hands stiffened for several seconds, what felt like hours that passed that they just looked at each other, but he released his grip on his palms and let his hands lay flat on his thighs. He wasnt offering them to Kurt, but he wasnt hiding them, either. The tips of his fingers were smeared in red, and his palms had gashes in them, red lines that drew patterns from the soft spot under his fingers down to his wrists. Putting his hands over Blaines, Kurt felt the torn up spots, the uneven skin and the grooves that hadnt been just made. "Will you come with me?" He murmured, scooting over to the edge of the couch and putting his feet on the floor. He boosted himself to his feet, waiting for Blaine to come after him.
Blaine made no movements, his entire body as still as a statue, and Kurt would have mistaken him for one, a chiseled sculpture that hadnt had the rough edges sanded off, had it not been for the slight shake to his fingers. Encouraging Blaine with a squeeze to his fingertips, Kurt saw him take a deep breath. He didnt let it out for several seconds, and then he blew out, giving in with a heavy sigh. He slipped off the couch and stood beside of Kurt, staring at him as if he wanted Kurt to make the first move.
Tugging on Blaines hands, Kurt turned away and padded over to the bathroom, flipping on the light as he went in. Blaine pulled away from him and leaned against the sink, his throbbing hands pressing to his sweatpants. The red stained the gray, a dark smear in the shape of long fingers. "Lets see... Ill warm the water and get a cloth. Well bandage your poor hands. Youll be all better very soon." Scooting a stool over to the sink and climbing on top of it, Kurt turned a faucet and felt the water. While it warmed, he reached up to the cabinet and pulled out a soft, white cloth. He pushed aside a few things in his search for the bandages and ointment. Returning his attention to Blaine, he wrapped his fingers around Blaines and held them under the water for a few minutes.
He pulled them back out when all of the red water disappeared down the drain, then he patted them with the cloth. "There... thats better, isnt it? Ill rub the ointment on the cuts and you wont feel sore anymore." Squirting some ointment onto his fingertip, Kurt rubbed it onto the raw slashes on Blaines palms, but he was distracted from his idle massaging when someone tapped on the door. He glanced up at his dad, who had retired to bed hours ago. Dark circles were wrapped around his narrowed eyes, and his nightclothes were wrinkled and ruined.
Rubbing the top of his head, Burt swallowed a yawn and mumbled, "Whats going on?" He blinked his bleary eyes a few times and focused on Blaines hands, which were still red and enflamed. His eyebrows furrowed as he tried to figure out what had happened. "Blaine, whats going on with your hands, kid? Is everything okay?"
Kurt puckered his lip, "Hes had a bad night, Daddy. But Ill make him happy! I promised him I would." Wrapping his arms around Blaines neck, Kurt frowned at the numbness in Blaines body, like he was too worn down to even lift his arms and bundle Kurt up just as tightly.
Burt leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest, "Youre nervous about things, huh?" Pushing his lips to one side of his face, he thought for a few seconds before he cleared his throat, "Listen, I... uh... Im no Elizabeth. She can make everything okay, cant she? But I want you to know that youre alright here. If you dont want to go back, I wont make you. But... you need to know that until your parents sign a couple of documents that say that they dont want you anymore, I cant do anything about it if they come to get you. Ill do what I can for now, though. Youre alright, kid." Bending down to scrub Blaines curls but pulling his hand away when Blaine ducked, he heaved a breath and said, "Get some rest, okay? Kurt, Ill be in the garage tomorrow. Come out if you need me, but youre good at taking care of yourself. You can make some breakfast. Just... get Blaine used to staying here for good. Youll treat him right."
"Yes, Daddy." Kurt murmured, half distracted by laying bandages on Blaines cuts. When his dad touched his hair and brushed it off his forehead, he lifted his head and gave his dad a smile. "Goodnight! Blaine and I will go to bed very soon. He needs to rest so he feels better, and I need my beauty sleep!"
"Uh huh." Burt left the room without another word spoken, but before he got too far away, he called back to them, "Night, you two."
Looking away from the doorway, Kurt squeezed Blaines fingers in his and said with a satisfied sound, "There you are. Well take the bandages off in the morning and see if the cuts are better. Now we must go to sleep... youll have a clear head in the morning. Youll feel okay again... very, very soon. I promise."
Blaines blank expression didnt change, those sad eyes becoming wet at the corners. "Oh, Blaine." Kurt cooed over him, nuzzling into his chest and feeling nothing but a deep chill. He wanted to warm Blaine up. "Youre okay... Ive got you. See? Youre safe." He lifted his head from Blaines pounding heart and gazed into his drained face. Squishing Blaines cheeks between his palms, he gasped when tears rolled down Blaines face, the first emotion hed shown Kurt all night long. Hed come to Kurt when he was panicked, nearly ready to beg him for a place to stay, and as soon as he was ushered in and held for a few minutes, hed calmed down, realizing that his parents werent coming for him. And then hed slipped away from Kurt, hiding away in the dark corners of his own mind. He hadnt said a word, not even when hed clawed at the door and given Kurt the most petrified expression when he opened it, but Kurt had read him like an open book.
Blaine was scared.
He didnt have anyone to be there for him, no loving mom and dad, no crazy aunt who held her arms open for him. He had nobody, so Kurt decided to be that somebody who could love him. Blaine collapsed against his chest, his shoulders shaking as he sniffled and snorted. "I didnt mean to upset them. I d-didnt. You have to believe me." Kurt had heard people cry before, and it made his own eyes a little damp. He didnt like to see people so sad. But hed never seen anyone break before, not the way Blaine did, and it shattered his heart. He clutched Blaine tighter, as if he was trying to shield him from the mean world. "Whats w-wrong with me?" He pleaded to know, and Kurt hushed him with a few strokes of his fingers through those messy curls that were damp with sweat.
Pulling away from Blaine, Kurt looked into those blurry eyes that glowed with tears. Blaine was so beautiful when he cried, and that hurt Kurt even more. "Absolutely nothing." He whispered so softly, and Blaine shut his eyes, trying to turn his head away. "Blaine? Youre beautiful to me, even with your scars." Running his fingers over Blaines cheek, he murmured, "Will you tell me about you?"
Blaine opened his eyes again, staring at Kurt with those big eyes, as if no one had ever asked of him before. His lips parted, and then he pressed them together, and then he opened his mouth again, but no noise came out. Kurt wanted to tell Blaine that he didnt have to be afraid to speak, that he could talk for as long as he wanted, that Kurt would listen to every word, so he said, "Im so happy you came back to me. I could never be without you." For the first time in what felt like far too long, a crooked grin tugged at Blaines lips, and he snuggled much closer to Kurt. A loving look overwhelmed his sad expression, and his adoring eyes flickered to Kurts lips. They leaned into each other for a kiss, and Kurt felt warmth on Blaines lips.
Blaine rested on the edge of the bed, feeling the mattress sink under his heavy weight, and he put his hands behind him. Turning away from his husband after he disappeared into the bathroom to ready himself for the long day ahead of them, he grinned at his two little ones who were tucked away on the plump pillows. They had cups of yogurt in their hands, a quick snack before they left the hotel, but they had forgotten about them in their trance for the TV, which was showing Snow White. A dribble of yogurt had fallen over Archers red lip, but he didnt even notice it, which made Blaine smile as he leaned back to wipe the smudge away.
He scooted forward again, looking around for a few things for the babies that needed to go into Kurts purse, but he checked off the baby wipes, the bags of cookies and crackers in case they got hungry while they were in line for a ride, and their teddy bear, Keegan. When they had brought the bear because it was their favorite, Blaine had hoped that it would stay together over the trip until they could get home to sew up the ear that Hunter had chewed off. It had already shed most of its stuffing in Kurts purse yesterday, so Blaine had spent most of the night packing the fluff back in because he didnt want the babies to worry that their bear was hurting. As if he knew that Blaine was thinking of him and his gnawing teeth that had chewed holes in many of his stuffed animals, Hunter crawled forward and sat down by Blaine, pressing himself against his back. He played with Blaines hands, picking them up and dropping them, yanking his fingers, and putting his thumb in his mouth. Blaine let Hunter have his hands, even though he could feel the sticky treat on Hunters mouth and hands smear onto his own hands.
When Kurt returned to the room, he finished tying a pink bow into his hair. He gave the babies fond grins, getting a sly one back from Hunter as if he was being so sneaky about messing with Blaines hands-like he couldnt feel it, and nothing from Archer, who was still in a daze over the movie. "Come on, sweethearts. Lets get some breakfast in your bellies. Ive heard of this wonderful restaurant where you can meet Mickey and Minnie, and you can munch on pancakes and waffles that look like them, too! It sounds yummy, doesnt it?"
"Yummy!" Hunter agreed, scooting off the edge of the bed and flailing his hands at Archer. "Arch, come with me! Were eating breakfast soon!" Archer finally glanced away from the screen, and he cried at Hunter to not run away, but Hunter was already gone by the time he was boosted down to the floor by Blaine. He waddled after him, and the two pawed at the door handle, trying to be freed to the fun park.
Glimpsing away from his babies, Blaine got to his feet and walked over to the table so he could grab his wallet. "Honey," he said as he turned his attention to Kurt, who looked up from the pink high heels he was slipping on. "Keegan and I were thinking about going on some of the rides that the babies arent big enough for yet. Do you mind watching them for a couple of hours?"
Kurt wriggled into a thin sweater that he buttoned up the front, "Of course I wouldnt! Hunter, Archer, we will have so much fun, wont we? Those silly boys will miss out on spending time with you two, wont they?" Archer put his hands on his hips and stuck his tongue out at Blaine, which made him chuckle at his baby. "This is a marvelous idea. The three of us will enjoy snacking on chocolate desserts while we wait."
"Yay! Chocolate!" Hunter cried, throwing his fists into the air. "Lets go, P�re! I want chocolate!" Charging over to Kurts side and taking his hand, he pulled him over to the door, making Kurt giggle at his silliness.
"I think youre the fun parent." Blaine grumbled, mocking offense at his babies. Hunters mind was too set on chocolate to pay attention to Blaines pitifulness, but Archer puckered his lip, sad that Blaine was disappointed. He held his arms up for Blaine, who scooped him up and kissed his cheek. "Theres my good baby. You make me feel better."
Kurt was with Hunter on his lack of sorrow for Blaine, and he teased with him, "Was there ever a doubt that you are the boring parent?" He covered his lips with his fingertips, but the wrinkled nose gave away a hidden smile that Blaine frowned at. Moving his hand to Blaines jaw, Kurt pecked Blaines mouth with a gentle kiss that Blaine helplessly smirked at. "My poor Blaine."
"Poor, boring Daddy!" Archer squeaked, patting Blaines cheeks with his little hands. Blaine chuckled at his baby, unable to feign being upset when his family was so funny.
Rubbing Archers nose with his own, he said, "Wheres my good baby? I thought you were on my side."
Archers eyes widened to the size of saucers, and he held up those little hands to show that hed been helpless in his choice to side with Kurt, "Daddy, P�re is giving us chocolate!"
"You have very much to compete with, my dear." Kurt laughed, his eyes shining with humor as Blaine gave him a pouty face, his eyes narrowing and his lips pushing to one side of his face. Reaching for the door, Kurt pushed it open and slipped through it after he picked Hunter up. He padded a few inches in front of them, pointing out all of the interesting things they passed by to Hunter, who clapped at everything he saw. Skipping along with Hunter, Kurt paused when they got close to the restaurant. Both of the babies tilted their noses up and sniffed at the warm scents that drifted over to them every time the door swung open.
Archer licked his lips, happily twisting this way and that to check out all of the platters of food that were sitting on the buffet tables. "Mm... Daddy, that smells good." Blaine held him over his shoulder, letting him look at all of the food so he could decide what he wanted. Carrying him over to a table and sitting him down by Hunter, Blaine took the seat next to his and helped Kurt into the chair by his.
A waitress came by to get their drinks, so Blaine asked for a berry smoothie for himself, and he bent down so Archer could whisper what he wanted in his ear. He told the waitress that Archer wanted a cup of juice with a lid that had Tinker Bell on it. Hunter ordered the same thing, except his lid with Buzz Lightyear. After the waitress left, Blaine took their hands and led them over to the buffet. He scooped out things he thought they would like, mostly guessing because they werent tall enough to see the tabletops and it was too difficult to hold them up and carry their plates. Taking them back over to the table once their plates were full of pancakes and waffles, he sat them down and put their plates in front of them. "Honeys, start on your fruits. Daddy will cut up your pancakes and waffles."
Kurt and Keegan returned to the table a minute later, their plates covered in French toast and oatmeal. His husband was laughing at something Keegan was saying, but he turned his attention to Archer when he cried for him and waved his hands. His drink was too far away from him to grab, so Kurt scooted it toward him and bent the straw to his mouth. Sucking on the end of it, Archer crossed his eyes so he could see Tinker Bell, who was sitting by the tip of his nose. He pulled his lips off and smacked them a few times, licking away the drops of red juice, then he grabbed a fork and jabbed it into a pear. He stopped chewing on the juicy fruit when Minnie came around to their table, flitting on light feet. She held up her hands at the babies as if she was surprised at them, and then she waved them. Hunter waved back at her, leaning into her spotted dress when she bent over him and hugged him tightly. She moved around to Archer, whose mouth fell open at the sight of her. "Minnie!" He cried, squishing himself into her when she wrapped him in her arms. "Daddy, its Minnie!"
She pressed a kiss to the top of his head, then blew a kiss to Hunter as she left to go to the next children. "Bye, Minnie! I love you!" Kissing his fingers, Archer batted them at her before he closed them around his fork again, scooping up a bite of pancakes that were shaped like Minnie. Blaine had drenched them in strawberry syrup, so pink juice ran down his chin as he shoved the pieces into his mouth.
Wiping Archers face with a napkin, Blaine picked up his own fork and ate a few bites of his eggs. He didnt have long to chew before he was distracted by tapping on his shoulder from Hunter, who pointed at the syrup bottle. "You like strawberries, dont you, baby?" He grabbed the bottle and poured a little more onto the plate, much to Hunters delight as he dipped a spoon into the syrup and slurped it up. Leaning back in his seat once he was sure the babies were okay, he turned to his husband and said, "Baby, Keegan and I will be back in just a few hours. Well come get you wherever you are with the children. Were going to see the Aladdin show tonight." Looking back down at his children, he smoothed Archers wild curls, "Does that sound good, baby?"
"Yes, Daddy." Archer said in between bites of waffle that he had stolen off of Hunters plate. He chewed very noisily because his little teeth couldnt sink all the way into the chewy treat, but he suddenly swallowed a big bite that made Blaine gasp and pat his back a few times to make sure it went down. His mouth fell open when he saw Mickey strolling by, his hands up as he waved at the children. "Mickey! Mickey!"
Mickey put his hands on his hips, pretending to be shocked at Archers enthusiasm. Rubbing his sons back, Blaine nudged him to the edge of his seat, and he leaned so far out that Blaine had to hold onto his waist. He wrapped his pudgy arms around Mickeys neck, then he cheered for Hunter when Mickey bent to give him a high five. "Love you, Mickey." He peeped, and Mickey turned back around to scrub Archers hair. He hid Archers little face with a giant glove, making him giggle as he peeked between the cracks of his fingers.
When Mickey turned away and bounced off to the next table, Archer stared after him for a few seconds, but he quickly twisted around to Blaine and held his hands up, "Did I do good, Daddy?"
"You were very sweet, baby." Blaine nodded, scrubbing a crumb off his sons cheek. The speck fell away, revealing one of his many freckles. "Are you ready to go, honey? Is your belly full?"
"Uh huh." Archer slurped on his juice again, his blue eyes flashing over to Kurt, who was gathering his purse and reaching for the baby wipes. Rubbing Hunters sticky face until he was clean, Kurt put the towelette down and picked up Hunter, who clung to his shoulders.
Blaine got to his feet and gathered Archer against his chest, letting him keep his juice cup in his hand. Grabbing Hunters off the table, Blaine handed it over to Keegan so he could fish his wallet out of his pocket. After he paid, he took his family out of the restaurant and boosted Archer up higher so he could look around at the sights on their way over to the Coffee House, which Kurt had heard had wonderful snacks. He stopped near the doorway, almost regretting having to leave his family for a few hours because he adored being with them so much. Handing Archer over to Kurt, he took a step back and shoved his hands in his pockets. Hunter reached out for his juice from Keegan, and as soon as he had it in his hand, he stuck it into his mouth.
He gave his children quick kisses, smacking both of their cheeks with his warm lips, and then he turned to his husband and cupped his cheek in his hand. Kissing him for a few seconds that Blaine wished would have lasted for hours, he pulled away and rubbed his cheek against Kurts, "Have fun, baby. Ill miss you so much."
"Youll be back in a few hours." Kurt said more as a question, and Blaine nodded his head. Kissing him one more time, he parted with a heavy breath and watched Kurt carry the babies into the snack shop. He watched them through the window, the three of them grinning at all of the warm treats and chocolates that were displayed behind the glass windows. Archer pointed at almost everything that he spotted, which made Kurt laugh as he said something to him, probably promising that he would get Archer all that he wanted.
When he turned away from them, he saw Keegan standing just a few inches away. That same smirk was stretched onto his pink mouth. He glanced over at Blaine, revealing the crinkles at the corners of his eyes, "Its never a good idea to leave Kurt in a chocolate shop." Blaines grin widened at that, and he looked back through the window, where Kurt was holding the babies up to the menu so they could see all of the chocolates and treats. "If he didnt like you so much, he would have married chocolate."
A snort escaped Blaine, a low noise that rumbled out of his throat, "Chocolate is a lot to compete with. The babies get their taste from him." They both laughed until they were in fits, and Keegan grabbed onto his sore stomach.
After they settled down again, they started walking away from the little shop that Blaine dreaded to leave-it was so hard to turn his back on his perfect family. Blaine glimpsed one last time over his shoulder, finding his babies at one of the tables and reaching up for Kurt as he handed them pieces of chocolate. He was distracted from watching them when Keegan touched his shoulder, one of the very few times hed ever reached out for Blaine. With his time in America and his lessons with Kurt about how to speak English, he was speaking up more, coming out of the clamped up shell that he had first protected himself with when Blaine had met him. Blaine thought it had something to do with Kurt, who had also pulled Blaine out from behind the walls hed built around himself. "Ive wanted to tell you something... since we met." Keegan said lowly, and Blaine raised his brows at him. He didnt know what Keegan wanted, but he was willing to listen. Hed become very close to Keegan over the months, treating him just as he did Finn before they went through what had changed everything between them. Keegan was family to him, an uncle to the children, and a brother to Kurt, so Blaine accepted him easily as his own brother. "Ive never thanked you... for loving Kurt. You have no idea what he means to me... and Ive always wanted to see him happily settled down with someone. You werent... anything like who I expected Kurt to be with, but I realize that I was blind before. I see that... you are what he needs. Ive never seen him like this before... he cant stop smiling when hes with you."
Blaines heart thudded, and he tried to keep himself from getting a stupid smile on his face. Shaking his head as if he was trying to shake off the sudden warmth to his skin, he leaned closer to Keegan and bumped his shoulder with his own. "Im not what a lot of people expect." He said in a teasing tone. "You dont have to thank me... for loving him. I didnt really have a choice to love him or not. I saw him... and I just..." his voice faded away as he tried to figure out what happened to him both times he came across Kurt, once when he was very young and the other when he was just a teenager, unaware that he was already in love with Kurt. "I just felt my heart start beating again. Itd been silent for a long time." Lifting his brows as he realized just how gushy he sounded, he coughed a few times, spitting up the pile of mush that had coated his heart. "Do I sound crazy?"
The corners of Keegans mouth flipped up, "Youd sound crazy to a man who didnt know love. But... my heart was silent before I met my Evie. And then... it started beating. When he died, he took my heart with him... so I thought it was silent for a long time. But I feel like... he still wanted me to love. He didnt want to take my heart with him. He never wanted to be selfish, so I decided that I would still love. And I do love... Kurt... and the babies. And... I love you. You didnt have to take me into your home... Im grateful to you... that you did."
"Youre welcome." Blaine said softly, looking down at his shoes as they hit the pavement, "I should be the grateful one... that you took care of Kurt for all those years. It meant everything that you be with my family... because its like youve always been a part of it. Youve always mattered so much to Kurt... youve been like a brother to him. And now the babies need you."
"I need them just as much." Keegan admitted, his voice getting so low that Blaine almost didnt catch it. "Kurt saved my life... and the babies make every day easier. Evie wanted children... he said he wanted to adopt a poor child who felt so sad, and he wanted to make him happy. Being around those babies... is like being with Evie again. I can sometimes hear him telling me of all the things he wanted to do with his son. He never got the chance to be a parent, but Im so glad that Kurt does. I always knew that Kurt would be an amazing parent. He has a good heart."
"I know." Blaine muttered, privately thinking of all the times that Kurt could have turned away from him, back when Blaine was a pitiful mess that couldnt blink without a tear rolling from the corner of his eye. Kurt had stayed with him, though, encouraging him little by little, holding his hands for every baby step he took away from Karofsky. He wondered if Keegan could read his mind, just as Kurt could, because he took a step closer to Blaine and put a long and thin hand on his back. Relaxing under Keegans comforting hand, Blaine gave him a weak smile, as if he was showing Keegan how exhausted he was as he fought and cried and screamed, only to be able to rest his head without a care when he finally gave in to Kurt, gave him everything about himself.
Keegan gave him that same look, a twisted mouth and glowing eyes, and Blaine thought about how things hadnt always been easy for him. He wondered what Keegan had been through that Blaine didnt know about. There was so much behind those turquoise eyes that Keegan had hidden away. "Your love is your greatest enemy, isnt he?" He said quietly, his lips drooping into a frown, "He can hurt you... more than anyone else ever can. But... if he doesnt... hes your greatest hero. Kurt rescued you, didnt he? Just as Evie rescued me."
The sad smile returned to both of their faces, and Blaine whispered, "I love him so much, Keegan. He always says that Im his prince and hes my princess, but hes the one who climbed the tower walls to save me." His emotions suddenly overwhelmed him, and he grabbed his throat, which was swollen with a lump, "He almost died for me, but he didnt care what kind of pain he had to go through to be with me. He just... wanted me, and Ill never feel like I deserve him."
Rubbing Blaines back, Keegan muttered, "You deserve him, Blaine. You treat him like a precious diamond. Youre whats best for him." He quirked a small smile at Blaine, trying to give him the confidence to believe that he was perfect for Kurt. "For a long time, I thought the same of Evie. He was so beautiful... he was just like one of his fragile paintings to me... I couldnt touch him or else I would ruin him." He pressed his lips together before he continued in a soft voice, "Kurt was the one who changed my mind. He saw that I was head over heels for Evie, but that I was nervous of hurting him. Hed been through so much, Blaine. He told me that... he knew I treasured him like a jewel... and he was a jewel. He was gorgeous. Kurt said that I would make Evies life better... and he saw Evie smile and laugh whenever he was around me. Evie never showed his emotions, so I knew I made him happy."
Blaine helplessly grinned at that, "The love you had with Everett is something that I wanted with Kurt for the longest time. You had passion with him... and you were each others hearts. Kurt told me when we came across each other as teenagers that he wished to have a love like yours... and I desperately craved that, too. I tried so hard to have that with Kurt... longing and affection and breathlessness... and we did, but it wasnt until... until I realized that... Im not a monster to him... that I gave myself completely to him. And, ever since then, Ive felt... fine. Im still nervous... I think I always will be... but Im fine."
"It wasnt always happy with me and Evie." Keegan mumbled, his hand tightening on Blaines jacket. "I knew him for a very short time. I was seventeen when we met, and I was seventeen when I lost him. For months, all we did was fight. He would scream at me because he didnt want to love me. Ive been slapped quite a few times." He pulled his hand off of Blaine and rubbed his jaw as if he was remembering all of the sore spots that had burst onto his skin. "I dont talk about this... to anyone. It took such a long time for Evie to tell me what went wrong to make him so scared of men. His parents abandoned him at an orphanage when he was young... they were wealthy blue bloods. Evies mother was far down a line of descendants from a duke and duchess of France, and his father came from Irish royalty. Its where Evie got his red hair and his dark skin. But... thats not what Im trying to tell you."
He shook that out of his head, and he cleared his throat a few times. "He was left there because his parents didnt want a child who had feelings for other men, but he ran away from the orphanage when he came of age because he was abused there. The orphanage was strict, and they starved the children of love and food. Bad children were slapped across the wrists and locked into a closet without dinner. Many of the children stole food from other children because they were so hungry, and they fought each other in the middle of the night so they werent caught. Evie lived off of crumbs... it was the only thing he could get from other children because they all shoved the food into their mouths whenever they received it. He got out of there when he was of the age to care for himself, and he lived as homeless, just as I did before I was taken in by Kurts aunt. But... he got so desperate for a place to stay... he was so cold at night... that he... he, uh..." his voice faded away for a few seconds, then he took a shaky breath, "he let men pay him for sex... and a place to stay while he was... under their deal. Many of the men abused him... they were low lives who touched his body with their dirty hands. When they didnt want him anymore, they turned him away. Evie was so scared that he wouldnt have another place to stay for a few weeks that he would steal from them before he left... and a few of them caught him after he did it... and they beat him until he was bloody and bruised. He couldnt take much more of it... so he tried to break off the last relationship he was in before he met me... but the man yelled at him that he had paid for more than what Evie was offering him. He... raped him... and Evie ran away from him that very night."
Keegan breathed in very deeply, closing his eyes for a brief moment. Blaine could tell that he couldnt stand to even think about Evies life before they met. Then he went on, muttering in a low voice, "We met soon after that... I brought Kurt with me to a coffee shop... and I saw Evie. You know that, and you know that I thought he was the most beautiful thing Id ever seen. I was so nervous to approach him, but Kurt could see the look on my face. He started laughing... you know, the laugh like he knows something that you dont. He pushed me closer to Everett, and I had no choice but to go over to him. Evie didnt want company, but I think Kurt lightened his heart. He looked at him as if he was so confused... Kurt couldnt stop talking. And, when Kurt left to get a drink, he leaned closer to me and whispered that Kurt was such a talkative gossip. He said it in a teasing way, and that was the moment I decided that he had to be mine. We started meeting very often every day... and I was falling more and more in love with him. We would go off on outings to this lake... he loved going there because he said it was a good place to think. We would sit under a cherry tree and talk for the longest time... and, one day, I told him... I loved him. I didnt see him for the longest time after that, and I was so worried that I searched all of France for him. I found him in an alley... with a man. I was so angry that I punched the guy... all I remember was feeling this twist in my stomach, and then I remember holding Evie in my arms. He pushed me away and told me that he was going to stay with that man, but I told him to come with me. He wouldnt follow, though, so I threw him over my shoulder and carried him to my house. When I got enough money, I moved out of Kurts house and bought my own. He fought me when we got there... he kicked and punched and cried that I had kidnapped him... but I wouldnt-couldnt-let him leave. I told him that he could stay there... he didnt have to give me anything and I would give him anything he wanted... anything in the world. And I would have. He stayed with me for a few hours because he was too tired to fight anymore, but he tried to leave in the middle of the night. I heard him up and about, and I found him taking money out of my wallet. I told him he could have it, that he could leave if he wanted-I could see that he was sad about being in my home, and I didnt want to hurt him like those other men had by forcing him to stay, and he just... put it all down and fell to the floor. He started crying, so I carried him back over to the couch and held him. He was so scared and confused because no man had ever given him something for nothing, and he thought I would take that all away, but I promised him that I loved him. I gave him our first kiss... and it was a first kiss for me, but hed had many kisses before. But... it was so wonderful, the best thing Ive ever felt. His lips were soft and sweet, and his kiss was so gentle."
"He never tried to run away again, but he still kept his distance. As time went on, we became so much closer... he started laughing more and crying less. He started climbing in bed with me in the middle of the night... he thought I was asleep, that I wouldnt know... but I always did. By morning, hed be back on the couch, but I always secretly had those memories. He grew to like Kurt, and he would always try to keep up with his gossip. He was never very good at listening to Kurt because he spoke too fast, but he pretended to know what he was talking about. One night... when we were laying on the couch together and watching his favorite movie... and one of Kurts favorites... Cinderella, he rolled over and pressed himself against my chest. It was one of the first times hed ever made a move toward me. He lifted his head and kissed me... and, later that night, after Kurt fell asleep, we walked back to my bedroom. He held my hand the whole way. We made love for the first time... it was the night I lost my virginity. He had lost his a very long time ago... but he told me that I was his first lover, that the other men were just uncomfortable weights on top of him. We never had sex again... but that was all I needed. It was the most amazing night. I soon decided to propose to him and marry him... When he was dying, I did ask him. I whispered it in his ear... at least, I think I did. It was so hard to keep control, and I dont remember much of anything. He told me he loved me after that... so I think he heard me. I buried him by the lake... it was his favorite spot to be. Wed often get coffee and muffins at the shop we met in, and then wed carry them out to the lake and sit at the edge of it and talk and kiss."
He pushed his lips to one side of his face, keeping them like that for what felt like a few hours before he parted them again, "Kurt doesnt know much of that. Hes so sensitive... he would cry if I told him, and I dont like seeing him upset. But... I hope you understand. What I felt for Evie... was a painful love. I thought he didnt love me back... but he did... all along. We had to give ourselves to each other before we could understand that we truly were in love. We had to love each other until our hearts were pounding and aching and burning. And we did. I still do... I thought that I would love Evie then, and now, and when that gorgeous, red hair of his was graying... I thought I would love the wrinkles that would appear with time at the corners of his eyes. I thought I would love how raspy his voice was as he aged. Ill never, ever see him like that, though. But you will see Kurt when hes forty... and fifty... and sixty, and I want you to feel passion, and longing, and breathlessness... even then. I want you to be everything for him that I wanted to be for Evie. Can you promise me? You dont know what Kurt means to me... hes everything."
"I promise you." Blaine said, such a simple statement-just three words, but Keegans expression that was so full of dread completely changed. He gave Blaine such a relieved face, as if hed calmed all of his nerves. "I love him... with all my heart. So much so... that its painful."
"But thats the best kind." Keegan murmured, and Blaine agreed with him, nodding his head just once. The two of them stopped walking, just staring at each other as they considered how deeply they had both fallen for their loves. A corner of Keegans lips turned up at Blaine, "Were the luckiest men, arent we?"
"More than lucky." He mumbled, quirking the same grin at Keegan. Grabbing a chunk of hair that was hanging over his forehead, he shoved it back, feeling his heavy curls wrap around his fingers. "Do you want to come with me? We can be back to Kurt and the children in a few hours." Taking a step over to the ride theyd first headed for, Blaine heard Keegans steps nearby, and when they got up to the Matterhorn Bobsleds, he turned around to face him again. "Im regretting not staying with Kurt and the babies and gorging myself on chocolate."
Keegan, who knew of Blaines weak stomach, chuckled at that, "I should be the one getting sick on rides. Ive never been to an amusement park before. This is so unusual to me." The wait was only twenty minutes, so they stepped up to the cart that rocked at the edge of the cave in the mountain. As soon as they were locked in, it rolled out of the station and plunged into blackness, so dark that Blaine couldnt see anything and had no idea of what was coming next. They tipped backwards as they went up the mountain, getting closer to the top, and he heard Keegan blow out heavily from behind him.
Soon enough, they shot down the mountain at a breathtaking speed, and Keegan burst into laughter. His light laugh echoed all around them until they reached a break in the cave, and spots blurred Blaines eyes as the brightness hit his face. Their cart rocked into another cave that shined with diamonds, and Blaine caught the beady eyes of the Yeti, who growled at them from his safe place in the corner of the cave. They flew out of the cave and almost rocked off the edge of a slim pathway that gave them no more than a few inches on either side. The cart dropped to a pool of water that smothered the tracks, and bullets of wetness flew up as the wheels kicked up the foam. They smacked Blaines arms and neck, and he reached up to rub the damp spots on his skin. Soon after he finished brushing some of the water off, they slowed down and stopped at the station, and the two of them stood up on knocking legs.
They wobbled to keep their balance after the bumpy ride, and they both chuckled at each other and their weak legs. Keegan had gotten wetter than Blaine, and his blond curls stuck to his cheeks. "I do feel sick after that ride." He pushed his hair off his face, shaking a few of the drips of water out of it.
"And you didnt after Hunter spun us around in that tire ride?" Blaine narrowed his eyes at him, and Keegan burst into laughter. "I dont know what will feel worse to my stomach, dropping a hundred feet in an elevator, or racing around in a rocket. The babies are lucky theyre not big enough for these rides." When they stepped back onto the walkway, they started heading in the direction of Space Mountain, which was only a few minutes away. Blaine didnt nearly have enough time for his stomach to calm down before they got to the queue. The wait lasted about twenty minutes, and Blaine amused himself during that time by looking over pictures on his phone, many that the babies had snuck onto it without him noticing. Because they didnt know how to work a camera, the pictures were very close up to their faces, as if they were trying to figure out what to do with his phone. He found one of just Hunters eye, and another of Archers nose, and one of their feet. He decided to keep every one of those pictures.
Sticking his phone back into his pocket, he followed Keegan over to the rocket and climbed into the seat beside of his. A bar was lowered over them before they shot off into darkness that quickly lit up with a flashing wormhole. Blaine couldnt keep track of all of the bright colors, his eyes flicking in every direction, but then he got dizzy again as they rolled down a hill and into a blackness that blinded him. He felt his body twisting this way and that, his movements completely out of his control. Beside of him, he heard Keegan inhale sharply as they whipped around a corner, and he turned his head to see the faint outline of his blond curls. They blew back with every breeze that hit his face, so Blaine knew his explosion of curls were doing the same.
A few seconds later, the light opened their eyes again, revealing the space station that theyd lifted off from. They slowed down at the platform, so Blaine stood up and held a hand out for Keegan. Keegans strong hand wrapped around his as he let him help him up, but his fingers werent very tight because his entire body was tingling and numb. He stumbled over to Blaine and hung onto his shoulder, and Blaine started laughing at his green face. "How many more of these rides do we have to go on?" He pleaded to know, and Blaine chuckled again and wrapped his arm around his shoulders. He was so pathetically unsteady that Blaine almost felt sorry for him.
As soon as they were out of the ride exit, they decided to take a break from the unsettling rides and stop at a food stand to order drinks. They both got lemonades to soothe their stomachs, and the coolness helped unknot them. When they finished the drinks, they went over to the Tower of Terror, which had a ten minute wait. They passed through the dark lobby where cobwebs hung down by their ears, and chandeliers rattled above them. After a few minutes, they stepped onto the elevator, hearing the doors slam shut behind them. They lowered into two of the seats that were in the front, giving them a good view of the creepy rooms that appeared with every floor they rose. He saw Keegans fingers tighten on the seat as they got higher and higher, and his own hands clamped on the arms of his chair when they dropped two floors. Through the glass, they saw the park below them, so slow and quiet compared to the chaos as they flew up and down.
Blaine choked on his own air and couldnt suck in a full breath, so he was more than relieved when they finally slammed to the bottom of the hotel again. The doors opened, so he unstrapped himself and tried to stand on legs that immediately caved. He bent over his seat, pulling in a few breaths before he righted himself. Keegan put an arm around him that time, and the two of them heaved laughter out of their tight throats. "I never want to go on another ride again." Blaine mumbled, hearing Keegans snorting in his ear.
They staggered all the way back to the Coffee House, both of them imagining the moment when they could throw themselves down in comfortable chairs and take naps. Blaine took a step up to the door and pushed on it, finding an almost empty room that was so peaceful. His babies and Kurt were exactly where they had left them, at one of the tables with plates of puddings and cakes and cookies around them. Hunter was slurping on a chocolate milkshake, while Archer was licking chocolate pudding off his wet fingers. Kurt had a mug that was filled to the brim with hot chocolate and milk foam and marshmallows at his lips, but he put it down with a clink when he noticed Blaine and Keegan. The prettiest smile overwhelmed his lips, and he tapped both of the babies, pointing out their uncle and dad to them. Grinning at them, the babies opened and closed their fists, asking for hugs.
As he got closer to the babies, he saw their brown mustaches, which made him chuckle as he bent to kiss them. He tasted sweet crumbs and sugar on their cheeks. "My precious babies... have you had a good day with your p�re?" They nodded their heads, but their mouths were so full of chocolate that they couldnt get a word out. He moved over to his husband and leaned down for a kiss, licking off the drop of hot cocoa that had run over his pink lip. His mouth was so warm from the drink, and Blaine smiled at those damp, sugary lips. "Thank you for watching them, baby."
Kurt pushed a cookie over to him, so Blaine sat down next to him and picked it up, munching on the edge of it. Lapping up what little foam was left on his hot chocolate, Kurt said around the rim of his mug, "We had so much fun, didnt we, darlings? Archer and Hunter had all the chocolate they wanted... they thought it tasted so good. Sweethearts, are you ready to go see a show?"
Archer smacked his lips, trying to lick the leftover chocolate off of them, "Yeah!" Scrambling off his chair, he held his hand out for Hunter, who hurried after him. The two of them surrounded Keegan, hopping and bouncing and pawing at his legs. "Uncle Keegan, come on!" He grabbed one of his hands and tugged him along, heading over to the door with him. Kurt started to go after them, but Blaine held him back by grabbing the bow on the back of his dress. He made a soft sound and turned around, looking at Blaine with a pair of the softest eyes.
Cupping Kurts face with his palms, Blaine pressed their lips, a soft kiss that deepened when he opened his mouth. He parted Kurts lips with a gentle nudge, poking his tongue at Kurts. Kurt made a noise of surprise, but he happily accepted Blaines kiss and smiled against Blaines mouth. When they pulled away from each other, Kurts eyes opened, very round and wide. Blaine looked over that shining face, catching the way Kurts cheeks turned pink at Blaines unblinking attention. His lashes lowered over his sparkling eyes, hiding that blue that Blaine absolutely adored. "Why do you kiss me until Im so breathless? You look at me as if Im a piece of this yummy chocolate."
A corner of Blaines mouth turned up, "I need you to know that I love you." Squeezing Kurts hand in his own, he mumbled, "Keegan and I were talking... and he told me that Im a lucky man to have you. And I am, sweetheart. I love you." Kissing Kurt again, Blaine heard him giggle, a high pitched noise that rang in Blaines ears.
"Ive never seen you like this, my silly man!" Kurt squeaked, his voice breathless, "Perhaps you and Keegan should go out more often." Getting one more kiss from Blaine, Kurt turned his head to his children when they cried for them to hurry. "Were coming, loves!" He held onto Blaines hand and scampered over to his children, keeping Blaine close to him.
The walk over to the show didnt take very long, not when the time flew by so quickly as Blaine stared at Kurt. He skipped along beside of the babies, chattering to them about how exciting the show would be. As Blaine thought about what Keegan had told him, all he could see was the day he married Kurt, the day he decided to give himself entirely to Kurt. He couldnt imagine not being able to hold Kurts little hand in his, and he couldnt bring himself to think of a morning that he didnt wake up in Kurts arms. He was so happy to be with Kurt, to be able to see him as he aged with every new day. He was glad that he would see him one day talking to their children who had grown into teenagers, both of them strong and confident because theyd been raised by Kurt, an affectionate and loving parent. Keegan had asked him to promise him that he would always appreciate what he himself would never have, and Blaine decided that he would do whatever it took to show Kurt that he always craved him.
They got into the theatre, which was already packed with people, and took their seats near the middle of the room. Blaine sat down beside of Kurt with the babies on the other side of him, and he reached over for Kurts hand. He played with Kurts fingers for most of the show, tugging them and rubbing the soft spot under his fingers. Glancing down at the babies every now and then, he noticed their enthralled faces, their mouths hanging open and their eyes as wide as saucers. Their eyes glistened at the booming of the lamp when Genie burst out of it, and then they shined as the Genie teased and played with Aladdin. By the time the musical got to the ending, their faces had started drooping and their eyes were dulling. Blaine picked up Archer and let Keegan take Hunter on their walk back to the hotel. When they got up to their room, Blaine took Hunter from Keegan because he was going to give the babies a nighttime bath before they settled in to watch Aladdin, but Kurt offered to wash them.
Turning away from the bathroom as Kurt put the babies in the tub and spun a faucet to run the water, Blaine noticed Keegan across the room. He was flipping through the babies movies on his search for Aladdin, but he glimpsed up as if he could tell that someone was watching him. "Keegan... thank you." He mumbled to him, and Keegan gave him a grin, somehow knowing what Blaine was talking about. He looked over his shoulder again, gazing at Kurt as he smoothed the babies wet hair back with gentle hands. They batted their little hands at him, and he pecked those dimpled fingers. "I promise you." He muttered again, "I promise."