The Nervous Mind Of Love
BelleA
The Shadows Sway Across Your Face And You Just Disappear Without A Trace Previous Chapter Next Chapter Story
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BelleA

Oct. 22, 2012, 11:22 a.m.


The Nervous Mind Of Love: The Shadows Sway Across Your Face And You Just Disappear Without A Trace


T - Words: 3,881 - Last Updated: Oct 22, 2012
Story: Closed - Chapters: 11/? - Created: Jul 12, 2012 - Updated: Oct 22, 2012
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Author's Notes: Warning Violence and mild Language,
September 20, 2006
The two weeks flew but quickly and painlessly for the most part. The Friday before the dance Blaine bought a white button up and planed to wear the green bowtie Kurt made him. When Blaine got home his dad was in his room on his computer. Delete your browser history Cooper always told him. He felt nauseous and weak; sweating out of nowhere his hands went numb causing him to drop the bag and making his presence known.
"What is this?" Caleb asked staring at Blaine’s computer screen. He was looking at a profile that belonged to Blaine on the Empty Closets website. Blaine’s heart was pounding and his mouth went dry. Words wouldn't leave his mouth as he tried to say nothing.
"Michael Blaine Anderson answer me danmit what the hell is this?" Caleb raised his voice.
"Nothing." Blaine stammered swallowing hard and clearing his throat.
"Don't lie to me boy, why are these gay forums bookmarked on your computer are you gay?" Caleb asked spitting the last word out.
"No," Blaine said but the tears rolling down his cheeks gave him away.
"Get out of my house!" Caleb shouted Blaine shook his head no and couldn't control his breathing.
"No-o, I-I have no-nowhere to go." He cried. Caleb stood up and charged at him pressing him against the wall. Blaine closed his eyes and flinched waiting for a fist to hit him.
"I will not have an abomination living in my house.”Caleb spat taking a step away from Blaine. “Get out now, I can't stand to look at you." Caleb walked away from Blaine into his room. Blaine picked up the jcpenny bag and walked out the house trying to hold back his tears as he walked up to Kurt’s house. Burt wasn't home when Kurt answered and Blaine lost composure.
"They kicked me out." Blaine blubbered as Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine and just let him cry for a moment. They managed to get to Kurt’s room and Blaine stopped crying long enough to talk.
"I don’t know what happened but when I got home my dad was on my computer looking at my empty closets profile. He told to just leave and I wasn't allowed back."
"You can stay here for a while Blaine. I'll talk to my dad." Kurt said rubbing Blaine’s back. "If you don't want to go to the dance anymore I understand."
"I do, I still want to go with you." Blaine sniffled at looked at Kurt through his wet eyelashes, "can I kiss you?" Kurt nodded his head and kissed Blaine but there was a sense of urgency in the kiss. Blaine was heartbroken but those few seconds share between Kurt made it better.
Kurt pulled away and looked at him, "go get cleaned up, I'll bring you clothes and get dinner started." Kurt said walking to his closet pulling cloths out. "What do you want for dinner?"
"It doesn't matter; I don't have much of an appetite." Blaine said. After school he caught the bus to the mall and bought his clothes, he was going to eat there but he remembered Friday night was lasagna night and wanted to eat when he got home.
"Okay, you should eat something though." Kurt said giving Blaine a set of pajamas, and leaving the room. Blaine sat a moment longer hearing Kurt in the kitchen moving pots and pans he closed his eyes and pictured his left 10 years from now. Just he and Kurt married living in a small town, Blaine owned the town’s music store and Kurt owned the neighborhood bakery. The two of them happy not worrying about what the world thought of them.
Blaine opened his eyes and went to the bathroom. He stared at himself in the mirror and hated what he saw. He looked at the scissor sitting on the counter and slowly picked them up taking a deep breath and cutting a chunk of his hair off.
He cut his hair down until he could see his ears and took his shower hoping that the myths about cutting hair were true.
When he got out he heard the TV now on football and Kurt talking to his father. He got dressed swiftly and walked out. Kurt stopped mid sentence and stared at Blaine.
Blaine smiled softly, "it smells great in here."
"You cut your hair." Kurt said in awe. Burt stood up and looked at Blaine.
"You look good kid," Burt patted Blaine shoulder and walked to his room. Kurt walked over to Blaine and touched Blaine’s damn hair.
"Why?"
"The dance I guess and I just wanted something new." Blaine said. He heard the shower in the master bed room start. "Do you like it?"
"You look adorable, like my own cabbage patch kid." Kurt said looking down the hall at Burt’s closed door before kissing Blaine. Blaine rested his hands around Kurt’s waist and pulled him closer.
"Kurt," Blaine breathed after Kurt pulled away and gathered his breaths.
"You take my breath away." Kurt chuckled and turned away walking to the kitchen to cook.
Blaine turned in early thanking Kurt for dinner and Burt for letting him stay over. He went to Kurt’s room and lied down his mind over thinking what to do these next few days breaking his own heart. He couldn't fall asleep when he was crying but as soon as Kurt came into the room he felt better. Kurt didn't notice he was crying at first, "Sorry I took so long I can’t skip out on my moisturizing." Blaine didn't say anything he didn't even turn around to look at Kurt. But the simple sniffle gave him away. Kurt put his hand on his back. "Blaine everything is going to be okay."
"How do you know?" Blaine asked his voice cracking horribly.
"Because we have each other. And I… I love you." Kurt said hoping Blaine would turn over to look at him.
"You can't love me; I'm your best friend." Blaine replied. He had never been in love but Kurt made him so happy, and things in his body stir like no one could before.
"Then I guess we're not best friends. I love you Blaine and I want to be with you, but you can never break up with me." Kurt said.
Blaine turned over and looked into Kurt’s glowing turquoise eyes, "you'll be my boyfriend?"
"Yes." Kurt said as Blaine wrapped his hands around him and mumbled, "I love you too."


Blaine was ecstatic to go to the dance with his boyfriend. The whole day he swore to himself to not even mention the fact that he got kicked out. Instead he had a good laugh with Burt when he helped Blaine fix the horrible haircut. Blaine gelled it back and got dressed his bowtie not as perfect as Kurt’s but he was still proud.
Burt took a few pictures of them and drove them to the dance. He told them to have fun and he'd pick them up in the same spot.
The dance was dark and loud the only lights on the dance floor and lamps at the food station. Everyone there saw them and whispered behind their backs. Blaine told Kurt not to care as they picked a corner of the room to hang out in for themselves.
Blaine wished things better, he wished he could slow dance with Kurt instead of just watching everyone else.
"I really like your hair slicked back. You're so handsome; you should never hide your face with your hair." Kurt said after a few minutes of staring at Blaine.
"Thank you, do you want to get out of here? We can hangout outside or go to McDonalds across the street." Blaine offered.
"Yeah, let’s do that." Kurt said. Blaine took his hand and left. "I'm really glad I came with you tonight." He said once they got outside.
"I'm really glad you're my boyfriend." Blaine smiled and heard the doors to the dance open and closed as a few boys came out.
Blaine’s stomach dropped as he turned to Kurt, "you should go find someone," His voice quivering.
"Hey fags," one of Blaine’s old friends Marcus called. "Why'd you leave the party?"
"I'm not leaving you out here." Kurt hissed to Blaine but Blaine grabbed his wrist, "you have to go Kurt now." Blaine said in a stern voice watching the other boys approach.
"Go back to the dance Marcus, we’re not bothering anyone." Blaine said harshly. Daniel and George were at his flanks both wearing a smug smile.
"Yes you are. Your disease is contaminating everything at this school. We came to tell you to leave. Or else." He threatened popping his knuckles.
"We don't have a disease dumbass. Homophobia is the only disease spreading around the school and you are the host." Kurt said hotly. Marcus pulled back to hit Kurt but Blaine punched him faster and yelled at Kurt to run as Marcus hit him. Kurt ran towards the dance and paused at the door looking at Blaine. For a second it was just the two of them fighting till Blaine got the upper hand and Daniel pulled him off Marcus and started hitting him. Marcus got up and punched Blaine while Daniel held him. George was recording the whole thing on his phone. Kurt couldn't watch another second as he ran inside looking for chaperones and teachers.
Daniel threw Blaine on the floor and Blaine slammed his head into the concrete causing him to stop fighting back. In fact after his hit the floor he stopped moving entirely and blood began to circle Blaine’s head , but it didn't stop the boys from kicking him.
"Wait stop, his head is bleeding, I think he's dead." George said looking at him "Holy fuck you killed him."
"What ever one less gay in the world, Monday afterschool we'll get Kurt." Marcus said walking away as the dance doors opened and Kurt ran out with one of the teachers. Kurt ran to Blaine started screaming and sobbing as the teacher tried to pull him away and call the cops at the same time. She couldn’t hold Kurt back and talk to the police so she let him go and locked the dance down.
"I shouldn't have left you." Kurt sobbed looking at Blaine’s disfigured appearance. The police siren echoed through the streets as Kurt stared at Blaine’s chest move softly. Kurt unraveled the bowtie hopping that will make him breath better but Kurt was afraid to touch him. There was just so much blood.
The police tried to pull him away but Kurt cried harder and said he doesn't want to leave him.
The ambulance came and allowed Kurt to ride to the hospital holding Blaine’s hand as the paramedics did everything they could in the quickly moving vehicle. Burt was already at the hospital when they arrived and Kurt ran right to him. Kurt couldn't stop crying not even enough to tell his dad and the police what happened.
They sat in the waiting room waiting for news and Burt was hopping the Andersons would show up but after two hours they never did. Kurt cried until he fell asleep on Burt’s arm. The cop that was on the case new Burt from high school and came to the hospital to tell them what happened.
"We picked up three kids about two blocks from the scene of the crime with a phone that they used to video tape the whole thing. At the very end they said they were going to do the same thing to Kurt. They are arrested and two are in for attempted murder. Your son isn't in the video at all so he shouldn't be involved with the court proceedings." Officer Hamilton said.
Both gentlemen looked at Kurt sleep on the chairs.
"Did you notify Blaine’s parents?" Burt asked.
"Yes I did, they said they will be here as soon as they can." The officer replied. "I'll call them again."
"Thanks Frank," Burt sighed.
"Call me tomorrow, I'll take his statement at your house, I don't mind." Burt nodded and watched the officer walked away. He returned to his seat beside Kurt and waited for news. Another hour passed, Burt dozed off watching the news but shot right up when several voices carried down the hall.
"You two are the worse parents under the sun I swear to god!" Coopers voice boomed down the hall as he walked into the waiting room.
"Well we're here now, so let’s stop arguing and just check on Blaine." Sarah said standing between the two men. Caleb looked completely unaffected by the matter, Cooper has seen him worked up over a faxing miscommunication yet now his son is in the hospital and not a single emotion spreads across his face. Cooper on the other hand was a mess, he had no belt for his jeans and his pajama bottoms were showing. His shirt was inside out and his hair was a sticking up. His nose was running and his eyes were red with tears staring holes into his father.
"I flew here from New York the second I got called, you two live here for Christ sake and I was here before you." Cooper said to his mother.
"I'm sorry Cooper. I've never been a perfect mother but damn it, do not make me feel bad for disowning him less than 24 hours he's in the hospital. We honestly didn't know what to do." Sarah said looking over and finally noticing Kurt and Burt sitting there.
"What are you doing here Mr. Hummel?" Sarah asked her voice raising an octave as she tried to composer herself to maintain the perfect wife status Burt knew her as. Cooper turned and sucked in a breath when he saw Kurt in the chairs.
"Kurt was with Blaine when this happened. No news has come but they all know no one was here for him." Burt said too tired to be mad. "Now that you're here I'll go home."
Cooper wiped his face and approached Burt. "Thank you so much. You're a good man, and your son is the sweetest, most honest, boy in Ohio." Cooper shook Burt hand and saw Kurt waking up in the chair.
"Where's Blaine?" Kurt slurred sitting up rubbing his eyes.
"We don't know son, but it’s time to go home." Burt said but Kurt shook his head vigorously.
Kurt rubbed his eyes and looked at Cooper tears threatening to spill over any second. Cooper opened his arms and held Kurt mumbling into his ear, "go home Kurt, I'll come get you in the morning but you have to get cleaned up and sleep. I'll call you the second I hear something."
"No, I can't leave." Kurt said starting to cry. Cooper noticed everyone was staring at them, and no one knew the connection the three of them shared.
"Come here," Cooper mumbled walked to the vending machine a safe enough distance for them to talk honestly. "What happened?"
Kurt sniffled, "there were three boys and they told us to leave or else then Blaine told me to run and I did now he's hurt. I should have stayed."
"Kurt don't think like that. He was only protecting you." Cooper said.
"Cooper I love him, nothing can happen and the second I leave something will." Kurt said wiping the tears from his eyes.
"I understand, I swear, I will call the second something happens."
"No Cooper, I'm not leaving at all." Kurt said his tone irate.
"Cooper." Sarah called as a doctor came out asking for the Anderson party. Kurt and Cooper ran over to them.
The doctor had a solemn face, "your son had many injuries we had to remove a part of his pancreas, and his major injuries include 3 broken ribs, hemorrhage of the brain and a linear fracture of his skull giving him a server concussion that put him in a coma." Dr. Foster paused, "there was also a moment on the operating table where we lost him but right now he is fine. These next three days will be very critical we have him in ICU."
"Can we see him?" Sarah asked crying. She felt guilty for just disowning him and now he is teetering between life and death.
"No I'm sorry not after surgery, and with him in the ICU it will be with strict limitations." The doctor said. "Do you have any questions?"
"What are his chances?" Caleb asked. His cool voice irritated Cooper so much he just wanted to turn around and punch him in the face. Was it so hard to give a damn for a few minutes?
"It’s hard to say, he has a linear fracture to the left side of his skull caused hemorrhage of the brain and the collapsed lung limited his oxygen in take which led to his current comatose state. I can't give a percentage but its not looking well. We'll know more after 24 hours of watching him. I've seen patients survive much worse and this is an excellent hospital."
"Thank you so much doctor." Cooper said walking to sit down. He felt sick at the thought of losing his little brother. The room was spinning so Cooper closed his eyes and took long deep breath. Kurt walked over to him sniffling; Cooper looked up but didn't say a thing.
"Will you come get me when you see him tomorrow?" Kurt asked softly. Cooper nodded his head yes and looked at Burt and nodded again before Kurt gave him a tight hug and walked to leave the hospital.
Cooper had the moment to himself and thought he never bullied kids when he went to Jefferson, but he watched, and laughed, he may have tease kids but never put someone in a coma. It’s not right for children to do this to other children. The worst part was Cooper phone had been ringing since before he got the call. He was afraid to read the new messages and to know who beat Blaine because he was unsure what he would do but he knew it wouldn't be lawful.
Sarah walked to Cooper and spoke softly, "do you need a ride home?"
"I don't think I'm going home." Cooper whispered, "why mom? This isn't right."
"I know but there is nothing here for you. Let’s go home, get refreshed and come right at visiting hours." Sarah said holding her hand out for Cooper to take. Cooper stood up and wrapped his arms around his mothers and cried silently trying to gather his breaths.
Cooper wasn't always this close to Blaine, when they were little Cooper teased Blaine and talked him into doing things he didn't want to. Their relationship bloomed after Cooper was in a fight and Blaine jumped in to help. Being 4 years and 8 months older then Blaine had its fall backs but since that day they were inseparable. The thought of losing Blaine alone was too much to handle, yet his mind kept going to that dark place. Him telling his children stories about the pictures of him and Blaine. It hurt yet Cooper kept going through all his memories. The good, the bad, the old, the reason, Cooper wanted his brain to turn off and shut up.
Sarah comforted Cooper for a few minutes before they piled into the Mercedes and drove home. Cooper only came with his wallet and the cloths on his back he was surprised when he got into his room and nothing had been changed. He decided to go into Blaine’s room to sleep but stood at the door in shock at all the boxes and the trash bag full of his posters and papers. Sarah was walking to the kitchen for water when she saw Cooper staring.
"Please Cooper, don't be angry." She warned, "Blaine doesn't live here anymore."
"He's 15 where does he live?" Cooper said through clenched teeth.
"You don't understand, it happened before all of this." Sarah said her voice wavering with uncertainty.
Cooper was livid Blaine’s room was destroyed books and movies in boxes along with the cloths from his drawers and closet.
"Goddamnit mom, what did you do?" Cooper hissed running his hand over his scruff covering his mouth to stop him from saying anything else.
"Cooper," Sarah’s voice cracked, "your brother is gay." She whispered, "I wanted to get him help but Caleb said it was too late. I just don't know what to do."
Sarah stared at Cooper as he began to cry for a different reason. So this is what happens when everyone else found out.
"I know. I've known since June he was gay, that doesn't make him a different person. Please leave." Cooper uttered. He was defeated the big strong big brother cried himself to sleep.


Kurt and Cooper sat with Blaine as long as they could. Kurt explaining what happened when Blaine got kicked out. Then told Cooper about transferring to McKinley and if Blaine would transfer as well. Cooper had no idea what his parents would do with Blaine.
Each day passed with aching pain and anticipation in Blaine waking up. But a week past and Cooper had to go to New York before he fell even further behind in his school work. He called the hospital everyday and Kurt would call him to find out if anything changed.
After the second week Kurt stopped calling, but he told Cooper why.
"I was reading online and it says that trauma patients don't usually remember thing that happened before their accident. And when they are in comas they remember even less, what if Blaine doesn't remember me at all." Kurt explained.
"I never thought of that. But Blaine even if he doesn't remember he'll fall for you again." Cooper said trying to be hopeful.
"I like it here at McKinley, they ignore me entirely and never bother me. But I see the things they do, the slushies facials, dumpster tosses they even lock kid’s port-a-potties and roll them around. I saw this kid with a Mohawk push another kid in a wheelchair down the stairs. I'll be a wall flower for as long as possible." Kurt said to Cooper. The faint noise of Burt coming home echoed through the phone.
"Do whatever you have to just be safe." Cooper sighed.
"I'll talk to you soon Cooper, but could you call me if anything happens to Blaine." Kurt asked.
"Of course." Cooper said listening to the dial tone of Kurt hanging up.
29 days Blaine was in a coma and the day he woke up he was alone. Cooper couldn't get there for 3 hours his parents disowned him. He didn't know what was going on or why everything was bandaged or in cast.
Nurse after nurse ran test on him and finally his parents came and started transfer paperwork to move him to Westerville hospital. Caleb and Sarah talked and decided to send Blaine to a boarding school they paid the school for all three years upfront and gave a wealthy donation to the English department.
Cooper had nothing to say to them about the exchange except for the fact it happened in a day and Kurt didn't get to say by to Blaine.

End Notes: The next chapter is fluffy... kinda

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My...heart...just....Belle this is unfair! DKIEWPpooNkPODWNpcnop! Why?! I didn't think you could break me any more but you did...

I promise the next chapter will make up for the pain!