Chapter 6

After receiving the letter Kurt hadn't had time to read it at school, so he had taken it to his room and read under his bedside light, the light causing an ethereal glow on the paper. He could feel the tears pricking at his eyes before he finished and a lone tear fell as he blinked. He could not even imagine how it would feel to lose such an important friend and suddenly thinking of losing Blaine, Rachel or Mercedes in circumstances like that, made tears appear faster.

He knew he needed to show Blaine that he wasn't alone, that he was amazing as he was and should show everyone around him how amazing he was too. He felt almost desperate that Blaine would flit around school never knowing, never really sharing. Operation Blaine started to take effect in his mind.

Dear X,

You won't ever know how upset I was to hear about your friend Michael; I don't even have the words to say to you. I know nothing I do or say can ever bring back your friend but I think his life may help other people more than he ever thought possible.

It's terrible that the school didn't care, couldn't make a difference and I am so very thankful that I have friends and family who are so supportive. I told my dad when I was fifteen and although I was worried about his reaction I shouldn't have been. He said he already knew and that it didn't matter. Although we're different as can be, I know he loves me and I am so grateful for that.

I think it's so important to be who you are and not pretend. I don't mean this as a slight on you X; I know it's hard to tell people at a new school, I can imagine that you wouldn't want to share with people you hardly know.

I have a story about this with Mercedes and Rachel that will amuse you! When Mercedes asked me out, both of us lonely and needing a friend – I pretended I loved Rachel so that she wouldn't think I was gay. It resulted in my smashed car window and a very angry Mercedes – and trust me, you don't want to see that! In the end, I told her the truth, we're still really good friends and it didn't make a scrap of difference. Real friends will love you no matter what.

At the beginning of the year, while Karofsky was harassing me and no one seemed to notice, when Mr Schue was determined to demonstrate my differences to everyone instead of celebrating my amazing voice, I felt that alone too. I came to school every day and pretended to be fine, pretended that the bullying didn't affect me, pretended that I was content alone but I wasn't. I was desperately lonely and I was starting to think I would never find someone. I thought about suicide then, how easy it would be to slip away and how sorry people would feel then but something happened, someone came along.

I am really glad that I can help you X to feel alive and good about yourself but I want you to know that all the time. I think you're great and awesome and all things right about the world – you should think about that whenever you feel down.

You see, you made me feel good about myself X, you saved me because I knew someone noticed, I knew someone cared and made a difference. You let me know that I wasn't alone.

I hope you never feel as bad as Michael did X and if you ever do please come to me first. It doesn't matter that I don't know who you are, I won't care, I can always listen. You are never alone.

Love Kurt x

Dear Kurt,

Thank you for your last letter. I had guessed when I first met you, first found out about Karofsky and noticed his harassment. Although I didn't know what you were like before I recognised the same expression on your face – the look of despair, feeling completely alone. You looked like there was no way out and you were defeated. Michael looked like that about a week before.

I think you're so amazing Kurt – I want to be able to say to you how you make me feel and how fantastic you really are because although I tried, I never really helped Michael, I was never enough. I know that one person can't make it better but I really do hope you would be able to come to me if ever you needed a friend. I would let you know who I was in a heartbeat if I thought you were in danger or needed someone physically to talk to.

I know what it is to feel loneliness Kurt so maybe this helps, maybe we can feel less alone if we know we have each other.

Love X

Blaine slipped the letter into Kurt's locker on his way to lunch that day but as he walked into the cafeteria, scanning the room for a familiar face so he could sit next to someone, he heard sudden music from the corner. It was simply a strum of a guitar that seemed to be perfectly timed to start as soon as he entered and he looked in the right direction to find the band playing but no one seemed prepared to sing. As soon as he noticed this drumming started and the bass kicked in and out of nowhere Rachel appeared from under a table and started singing.

Look at the stars, look how they shine for you,

And everything you do.

Yeah, they were all yellow.

Tina then appeared from under a table at the opposite side of Rachel and as they both approached the middle, she sang.

I came along

I wrote a song for you

And all the things you do

And it was called 'yellow'

As Tina and Rachel met in front of the band they came down the aisle between the cafeteria tables, each holding a yellow rose, and handed it to Blaine, who stood there open-mouthed. Finn suddenly jumped out from behind the drum kit and Blaine chuckled wondering how he had managed to hide himself there and he came forward too, singing.

So then I took my turn
Oh what a thing to have done
And it was all yellow

They all sang, smiling widely at Blaine, whose cheeks were getting warmer as the rest of the school were watching.

Your skin
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
You know you know I love you so
You know I love you so

Santana and Brittany appeared from behind trolleys that the dinner ladies had been wheeling to the other side of the cafeteria, singing with big grins and walking towards Blaine, who was now truly the centre of attention, in the middle of the room.

I swam across
I jumped across for you
Oh what a thing to do

Cause you were all yellow
I drew a line
I drew a line for you
Oh what a thing to do
And it was all yellow

They handed him daffodils and smiled.

Your skin
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
And you know for you I'd bleed myself dry
For you I'd bleed myself dry

As the drumming continued, the guitar strumming along, Mercedes and Artie entered through the doors, carrying yellow daisies and singing along with the rest of glee club.

It's true
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine for
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine for you
Look how they shine

As the music slowed, the volume becoming quieter, the cafeteria went darker and lights sparkled on the blank white wall on one side of the cafeteria. They looked like stars and Blaine gasped. Kurt's voice could be heard behind Blaine as he sang near his ear:

Look at the stars
Look how they shine for you
And all the things that you do.

Blaine turned around slowly as the song finished to be greeted by Kurt's smiling face, his blues twinkling in the radiance around him.

"Kurt?" Blaine whispered, afraid his voice would ruin this moment, change the atmosphere.

"We wanted to let you know how amazing you are Blaine," Kurt whispered too, "Did you like it?"

Tears appeared in Blaine's eyes as he looked around at the Glee club, all expectantly looking at him, wanting to gauge his reaction, hoping he enjoyed it. He didn't know what to say, couldn't speak as he looked at his friends then turned back to Kurt, who looked so happy.

"I… this is so… I mean I can't believe you did this…" Blaine whispered, blinking away the tears so not to embarrass himself. Kurt clutched his hand, trying to implore Blaine to look fully into his eyes and understand.

"You're special Blaine, you should know that. The stars really do shine for you…" Kurt sang, smiling and knowing full well how cheesy he was being.

"Thank you Kurt, this means… it just is…" he stuttered, "Well it means a lot." Blaine nodded his head at the rest of the glee club as they approached him, hugging him and laughing. He had never felt more loved.