Nov. 11, 2011, 7:17 p.m.
In My Veins: Chapter 5 - Fashion of His Love
M - Words: 1,167 - Last Updated: Nov 11, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 14/14 - Created: Aug 04, 2011 - Updated: Nov 11, 2011 1,250 0 0 0 1
Blaine shook himself out of his memories when he realized that he was just wandering aimlessly through town. Wandering aimlessly through life it seemed like. He wished he could find someone to spend his time with but there was no one. After about an hour of just walking through town, he found a bar on the corner of Main and Lima Boulevard. He never remembered it being there before but he still walked in. It was dark and stuffy as bars are and should always be. He took a seat at the bar, secluded from everyone. He ordered a whiskey and coke and sat nursing it for a long time, silently watching all the people in the bar. Most were just barely over twenty-one, attending the community college just down the road. He thought of how he must look to all of them. A scruffy, late twenties man in his jeans that were just a tad bit too tight and a navy cardigan. The tan Oxfords on his feet pushed it over the edge and made him look a lot older than he is. What a lonely soul. A women at the bar a few seats down from him caught his attention, she was young. She looked almost too young to be allowed in this bar. She winked at him and Blaine just smiled weakly back. If only she knew.
He thought back to a time when he was still so confused about who he was. When he had gone out on a date with Rachel because he was still so unsure of himself. He remembered how hurt Kurt had been by his actions but he was thankful that he had the experience. It was because of this that he finally realized who he was and the person he was meant to be. He took another long sip of his Jack and coke and winced as it slid down his throat. His mind mulled over a lot of things but the one that came up the most that night was what he was going to say or feel when he finally did see Kurt. Would he look different, act like a different person? Blaine knew that the fashion industry wasn't exactly a forgiving field to work in, you had to earn your place. Blaine was afraid to see the man that Kurt had become over their years of being apart.
One drink turned into two. Two turned into four and by the time the bar was getting ready to close for the night, the bartender had to call him a cab. He barely slurred out his parents address before the cab started to drive off. It dropped him off in the driveway and Blaine carefully and as quietly as he could, unlocked the front door and stepped in. It was pitch black in his house but by memory he started to make his way into the living room. Suddenly a side table lamp flicked on, Blaine was momentarily blinded by the brightness but when his eyes started adjusting to the light he saw his father sitting in his favorite arm chair. Blaine sighed in resignation.
"I'm 28 years old, you don't have to wait up for me at night." Blaine said in a harsh whisper. He didn't want to wake up his mother but he didn't want to sound like he wasn't irritated about his father's actions. His father just stared back at him.
"You've been drinking." he said flatly. Blaine could physically feel himself giving the biggest eye roll he possibly could.
"Once again, 28 years old." Blaine said. His father stood up. towering over him and Blaine suddenly felt like he was right back in high school. Looking up at his father's angry face.
"If you are going to be staying here while you are in town you are going to follow my rules. If you are going to be coming and going at all hours of the night then you might as well not come back." His father said, anger spewing out of every word that spilled from his mouth. "We tolerated your delinquent behavior when you were younger, we won't tolerate it now." Blaine scoffed back at him and he did something that he had always wanted to do in high school but never had the courage to do.
"Delinquent behavior? Let's back track shall we? I got perfect grades, had a perfect record...so by delinquent behavior you mean being gay?" Blaine said, his voice raising a bit. He didn't care anymore if he woke his mother. A flush washed over his cheeks but he wasn't sure if it was because of his anger or the alcohol.
"Don't raise your voice to me!" His father said a bit louder than Blaine.
"No Dad, you need to hear some things! I'm gay, end of story. Get used to that because it is never going away. If you can't be proud of that, at least be supportive. You know, I'm your son and you don't even have a picture of me on the mantel. I went to Burt Hummel's house tonight. It's been eight years since I've seen him but there is a picture of me on his mantel. I'm not even his son! What does that say about us Dad? About you?" Blaine was sure that he was shouting now, shouting at his father like he had always wanted to.
"I'm tired of you, tired of the deluded way you think. After all these years you couldn't move past one part of me and just love me." Blaine finished, his face was warm, his cheeks red and his eyes were fighting against the tears that threatened to push over.
"No, I can't. Because I didn't raise my son to be this sick person. You just don't understand." His father shouted.
"And I won't ever. Tell Mom thanks for everything." Blaine said as he walked towards the front door, where his suitcase was resting.
"Where do you think you're going?" His father called. Blaine turned to look back at him, his eyes red.
"To find someone who actually cares about me." Blaine said as he walked out and closed the front door, shutting that part of his life away.