March 1, 2013, 3:15 p.m.
Let's Play Pretend: Epilogue
M - Words: 1,213 - Last Updated: Mar 01, 2013 Story: Complete - Chapters: 12/12 - Created: Feb 18, 2013 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022 1,717 0 8 0 0
The letter comes over two months later, on yet another too hot, early August afternoon when Blaine doesn't know what to do with himself, all alone in the silent house.
There's no return info on the envelope and the stamp is so smudged it's impossible to say where it came from. Even his address is typed. But the neat handwriting on the single sheet of paper inside is unmistakably familiar, and for the first time in weeks, Blaine smiles.
He can't stop smiling.
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard
That's it, just two lines, a handful of simple words in the middle of a crisp white sheet. But it's enough. It's a world for Blaine.
They're alive. Kurt is alive.
Blaine doesn't show the note to anyone, or even mention it, but he often opens his journal where it lives now and simply breathes in the knowledge that somewhere out there, Kurt cares enough to let him know they're okay. And once he realizes the lines come from a song, questions never leave his head.
Did Kurt want him to listen to it? Does it have a special meaning?
Can it be that he's telling Blaine that he's in love with him? That they will meet again one day soon?
He has no answers. But the letter is enough to let him start to heal.
---
The fight when Rachel finds out is worse than any they've ever had – and they've had plenty lately. She's pacing the tiny room they rent, looking ready to tear someone to shreds, barely keeping herself in check. Kurt tunes her out somewhere after "One clue, one shred of evidence and they'll find us if they know we're not dead!" It's nothing he hasn't thought about before.
She stops eventually, annoyed with his silence. "Well?"
Kurt just shrugs. "I was careful. And Blaine won't tell anyone."
"How can you be so sure?" Her voice is loud and shrill, and Kurt winces.
"I just am. And... Rach? I know what it feels like to grieve. I don't want this pain for him."
She kneels down in front of him and takes his hands, her eyes pleading, confused. Her voice is soft again, barely more than a whisper.
"But Kurt, he's just a boy. He's not worth risking everything over."
"He is, though." He holds her gaze, open and unafraid, and that's enough for her to read him to the very soul.
He lets her.
"... oh my god. Kurt, are you..."
He waits.
"You love him."
Her eyes are wide, her fingers tight on his hands, almost painfully so, and Kurt leans closer to kiss her forehead.
"I do."
---
By the time school starts again, the "Hummelberry mystery" is swiftly becoming a local urban legend, wrapped in so much bullshit it's nearly unrecognizable. Suicide pact. Murder. Alien abduction. Religious cult. Witness protection gone wrong. Child molestation.
It doesn't help that there was no funeral, not even a memorial service, and Kurt and Rachel's parents quietly moved away during the summer.
Blaine only shrugs when asked for an opinion.
He knows the truth, at least the sliver of it that counts. And he'd never betray their trust. So he just goes back to his books and his Glee and his college applications, waiting. Always waiting.
But there are no more messages, no contact at all, and as months pass, doubt creeps into Blaine's mind. Was the note really from Kurt? Or did he imagine it? The piece of paper is creased and well worn from frequent handling now, and while it still provides proof and settles Blaine's doubts, it doesn't really promise anything.
Maybe it was the only time Blaine will ever hear from them. Maybe the letter is the last memento of an unusual high school love that seemed larger than life, but got cut short.
Maybe he shouldn't spend his whole life waiting.
It's March when he carefully places the note in a box with his most prized possessions, along with the bowtie he just can't wear anymore, and tells himself that life goes on. Since August, he's gone through relief and joy and calm anticipation, through desperate longing and hurt and misery. Now he's just sad.
One quiet evening, after dinner, he tells his parents about Kurt. It doesn't hurt anymore, the name on his tongue still heavy and tear-salty, but worn smooth by time. He speaks of the friendship, the love that grew over months, about their suicide. He explains the siblings' situation, as much as he knows of it, and the need for secrecy, and asks his parents to keep it to themselves, just in case. Even now, he doesn't want to generate gossip by revealing anything private to the world. And his parents can be trusted, he knows. Still, he doesn't mention the letter.
They hug him, his mom crying a little, and tell him that they're sorry for his loss. The fact that he was in love with a boy never even causes a concerned look or a raised eyebrow. What matters is that he loved, and he had his heart broken.
He tries to move on.
It's not easy to feel the spark again when the one deep in his heart is still alive, stubbornly and hopelessly so. Still, he tries. He goes out with a few girls, though never more than three dates; he even has sex twice. It's nice and good and sweet, but it's not it.
He thinks about going out with a boy, even visits a gay bar once. He gets hit on plenty, but no one elicits the same reactions Kurt did. Being there feels wrong, like cheating, so he leaves and doesn't come back.
In May, New Directions finally wins Nationals. Among his ecstatic friends, Blaine can't help but feel the two empty spots by his side where they should be. It's like a phantom pain, still flaring sometimes. He wonders if it will ever disappear for good.
He goes to prom with one of the cheerleaders, a nice, pretty blonde who looks like a dream in her golden dress. Afterwards, they spend the night together in a hotel room. Blaine knows that in five years, he won't even remember her name.
He graduates. He spends his last vacation at home and as soon as August starts, he's in New York. New life, new chances, a clean slate. He finds a job, gets settled in his dorm, starts classes. High school memories slowly start to fade – those most vivid, most important ones among them, though there are still days when they hurt like an open wound.
And then, one rainy night in late October, Blaine opens his door to find a familiar set of stormy blue eyes there.
But that's another story entirely.
THE END
Comments
OH.MY.GODThis was beautifully amazing and I'm still trying to work out what was going on. I keep thinking Scientology or Cults as far as what was happening with Kurt and Rachel but I'm still so unsure. I hope that your last sentence is a tease to a sequel?
Holy shit! Make a sequel! Please? Mother fucker! You are such a great writer! This story rocks!!
Please tell me you're writing the next story already?
my heart </3
OH MY GAAWWDD!!!!!! I thought you were going to crush my heart with Blaine having to move on without Kurt but instead you made it burst with Kurt finding him again. Please tell me you're writing a sequel, please, please, please!This was astonishing. So, intriguing, I'm still trying to figure out what the deal was with the parents and "the council". Some kind of weird ass cult? Do they have to hide forever? Will they never be free? And the visuals were just gorgeous. So stylish and creative and they mirrored and complimented the story perfectly.This was a beautiful and enchanting read, thank you so very much! I can't wait for tomorrow's video.
I have just one thing to say...MORE!PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE write a sequel! We need happy Klaine and I think Blaine deserves to know the truth, yeah?
Please tell me that there will be a sequal!!
oh my god and now im crying, i have so many questions but i know i want get answers thats fine i just want you to know never stop writing your amazing