A/N: Thank you to everyone still following this story even though I've been slower with the updates lately. It's far from over – there is still about 1/3 of the boys' history to tell – but I intend for it to be completed by the time season 5 rolls around at the end of August. So it's going to be a busy summer of much more frequent updates.

But before that happens, there may be 3 or even 4 weeks of silence before chapter 21 is posted, while I focus on writing the sequel to Let's Play Pretend and post a new big (completed) story that I've worked on for about a year (it's called Collateral Damage, it has a TON of warnings and I'll probably start posting it in a day or two). I'm not saying this break will definitely happen – I may get inspired and do the next chapter earlier anyway – but I wanted to give you a heads-up just in case.

Now on to the chapter :)

-----------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 20

Campaigning for president was hard work, it turned out. Especially since Brittany had decided to join the race, claiming that the school politics needed more girl power – and, for some reason, unicorns. Her posters were a colorful chaos of glitter and rainbows, and her campaign pretty vague, but she managed to get the feminine part of the school population interested. Winning was going to be much trickier now than just outtalking and outsmarting Rick the Stick.

Kurt had been so busy with the campaign that he didn't have much time to actually think about his college applications. Yes, he'd told Blaine he would go to New York. But saying it and actually taking the first steps were two different things. He needed some time for the decision to settle in his mind and his heart. He needed to spend some time with this thought, a few quiet hours by himself, to feel it, deep within – to see himself in New York without his soulmate, and to be certain that this was what he wanted. That they could do that and survive.

It took him over a week and a sleepless night to get there. But then he was ready.

The next day, after first period, he found Rachel in the choir room, sitting alone like she often did these days. Kurt felt a little awkward, approaching her like this after he'd avoided her for days, unwilling to deal with her attitude. But now that he actually looked at her – really looked – it was clear that she hadn't been too well. She didn't look happy as she sat at the piano, her usual manic determination and endless energy gone, and it suddenly struck Kurt that she must have been pretty lonely. Not many people managed to stand Rachel Berry on a daily basis, let alone get close to her. Without Finn or Kurt, she didn't really have close friends.

Rachel noticed him hovering in the doorway and sent him a ghost of a smile.

"Hi Kurt. What are you doing here? Where's Blaine?"

Kurt walked closer and leaned against the piano. "I left him talking with Santana. She's ridiculously fond of him... well, in her own way at least. I wanted to talk to you alone."

"Why?" She looked surprised. Kurt took a deep breath.

"I'm going to Julliard after all. Or at least applying. The point is... I'm still going to New York. We can still go together, we can live together like we planned, we can–"

Rachel was shaking her head. "I'd love to, Kurt, but...  Julliard doesn't have a musical theater department."

Kurt felt as if the earth tilted under his feet. "Wait, what?"

They've been planning it for so long; it was always going to be Julliard! Now what?

Rachel sighed. "I spoke with Miss Pillsbury. She suggested a different city, but when I told her I wouldn't settle for anything less than New York, she told me about another school. Have you ever heard of NYADA?"

Kurt shook his head.

"It's the New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts, apparently the best school in the country for musical theatre. But it's pretty exclusive, and they only take about twenty students a year." She looked grim. Kurt smiled at her.

"Oh. That's settled then – we just apply there, right? I mean, Julliard, NYADA, no big difference – it was always going to be the best acting school in New York, and we knew it wouldn't be easy."

"Kurt, you don't understand. The competition is going to be crazy. I actually went to a mixer they hold for prospective students last week and... Kurt, the people there were phenomenal. As good as us – better than us! And they all have credentials – like, in utero credentials. Multiple roles, and not just in school productions, either. We stand no chance with them."

Kurt's heart sank a little, but he just stood up taller, his usual reaction whenever someone told him he couldn't do something or be something he wanted.

"Then we'll have to work harder, make our applications better. Come on, don't tell me you're giving up? There's still time. We'll just have to make sure the musical happens this year for a change, and then we can star in it. And you have plenty of clubs and activities to put on your resume, and I will hopefully have the presidency, and then we're going to win Nationals with the Glee club. We're going to get in, Rachel. Both of us. NYADA, beware – here we come."

Rachel laughed wetly through the tears that were running down her cheeks. She jumped up from the piano bench to pull Kurt into a tight hug.

"Oh I missed you. I'm sorry I was a bad friend before. I'm so happy for you and Blaine, I really am, and I can't wait to be in New York with you. You're right, it was never going to be easy but following your dreams never is. Come on, let's find the best musical we could propose."

***

Blaine was worried. Between Brittany gaining in the presidential polls and the NYADA news, Kurt had been increasingly stressed these last few days, so much so that Blaine could literally feel it radiating from him whenever they were in the same room. He was doing whatever he could to be the supportive, comforting counterbalance in Kurt's life, and most of the time, it worked. But now that West Side Story had been approved and the auditions started tomorrow, Blaine wasn't sure what to do.

He wanted to audition for Tony. It was a dream role for him, and he wanted to at least try to put himself in those shoes, even if it was just for that one moment on stage. But then he'd have to audition against Kurt. He wouldn't be the only one, either. He'd heard two sophomores talking excitedly about trying out for Tony during lunch – not that they posed a serious threat, from what Blaine saw of their acting. But Blaine knew how auditions worked, how subjective cast decisions could be. And if he happened to win the lead – how could he take it from Kurt, when it meant so much for his college application?

No, it was better if he didn't try at all. Or he could just audition for the role of Bernardo. Or Baby John. Or Diesel. Whichever, really, even just Officer Krupke. He would get a lead next year, when he would need as many distractions and time-fillers as possible, anyway, not to mention achievements to add to his own NYADA application.

But even after he'd made his decision, it kept niggling at his mind, like an annoying grain of sand.

"You're not trying for Tony?" Kurt asked, surprised, when Blaine told him about his audition plans that afternoon, on the way to their cars after booty camp. Blaine shrugged.

"No. Tony is–" yours, he wanted to say, but it didn't feel right. "I don't want Tony," he said instead.

The way Kurt looked at him – as if he was about to call him out on the lie – made Blaine shuffle his feet uncomfortably and dig in his bag for the car keys that had been in his hand all along. Was he that transparent? Or was it yet another thing their marks were causing now, the inability to lie to each other?

But Kurt just looked away after a moment, straightening the strap of his bag. "Oh. Okay."

They drove to Kurt's house and Kurt steered the conversation to campaign matters as soon as they entered, and everything felt almost like any other afternoon. Almost, because there was barely noticeable tension in the air until Blaine went home that night – unspoken words, a hint of unease.

By the time they met again in the morning, it was gone. Kurt seemed more affectionate than ever all day, holding Blaine's hand whenever they were together and whispering sweet nothings into his ear until Blaine blushed and bit his lip to resist kissing him. So he pushed away the concern that had stayed with him all night, and focused on Kurt's hand in his, and Kurt's excitement about his afternoon audition. He did the right thing – he made Kurt happy, spared him additional stress. It was the right decision.

Blaine could barely wait until Kurt got off the stage after his audition before grabbing his hand and pulling him away towards the parking lot. God, Kurt's moves, the flexibility of his sinuous body up on the scaffolding, the play of the muscles in his arms – watching it had driven Blaine crazy, and there was no way he could do what he really, really had to do anywhere at school. They needed privacy.

"Blaine, what–"

He whipped around to look at Kurt, never letting go of his gloved hand. "Please tell me we'll have a moment alone."

Kurt laughed breathlessly. "No one will be home until dinner. So you can slow down and let me take off the gloves at least."

"No! Don't." He swallowed convulsively and spoke softer. "Please don't take them off. Don't change anything." The gloves, the way Kurt's hands moved when he twirled the sais... Blaine could suddenly think of a dozen other uses for those dexterous fingers.

Kurt arched his eyebrows with a knowing smirk. "Ooh. You like my outfit?"

"I like you. In this outfit, too, yes."

Kurt grinned and tugged at Blaine's hand. "Better hurry then, if we need that time."

Kurt barely made three steps towards the bed when Blaine stopped him with an arm wound around his waist, a hand splayed wide over Kurt's stomach pressing him back into Blaine's body. Kurt hummed softly when he felt Blaine's erection against his ass.

"Mm. Eager."

Blaine kissed his way roughly down the side of Kurt's neck to the crook of his shoulder, hot and still sweaty.

"I've been hard since the beginning of your performance." He sucked on the thin skin, causing Kurt's hips to stutter back. Kurt's voice was higher already.

"Blaine... bed, please. Come on."

"No. Stay like this, don't move." And with that, Blaine did what he'd been craving from the moment Kurt first turned his back during his performance, showing the red strings tied up the high waist of Kurt's pants.

He slid down to his knees, his body still flush with Kurt's back, his hands smoothing down Kurt's chest, his stomach, his thighs. And then he took the end of one of the strings in his teeth – and pulled.

Kurt gasped. "Oh my god, what are you–"

The rest of his question was lost in a quiet moan as Blaine finished loosening the ties. He hooked his thumbs in the waistband over Kurt's hips, tugging lightly until the pants dropped to the floor – a nice benefit of them being so loose this time. And then Kurt stood there in his shirt and black briefs clinging to the delicious curves of his ass. The perspective was perfect – Kurt's legs seemed even longer, his shapely behind right at eye level – and Blaine wondered why he'd never thought about doing this before.

He couldn't resist kissing his way up the sensitive back of Kurt's knee to his thigh and higher, until he was sucking and nipping at the swell of Kurt's ass along the edge of his briefs, his fingers dipping shallowly under the soft cotton. Kurt shivered when Blaine reached around him to find his cock, already hard and straining in the confines of his underwear. Blaine took a moment to enjoy the whisper of the fabric under his stroking hand, the warmth of it under his lips where Kurt's muscles shifted and pressed involuntarily into his touch.

By the time Blaine pulled the briefs down, there was a wet spot forming on the front and Kurt was letting out soft, high little moans. His knees buckled when Blaine's hand finally encircled the shaft of his cock, Blaine's teeth gently grazing the skin of his ass cheek.

"Blaine–"

Blaine hummed against the supple skin, his hand stroking slowly. "Mm. Do you have any idea what you did to me during this performance? You were gorgeous out there, with the scaffolding and the sais, and your voice, god, you'll be perfect as Tony."

Kurt gasped out a surprised laugh. "Yeah?"

"Definitely." Blaine kissed his way closer to the crack of Kurt's ass and traced the tip of his tongue, feather-light, up the divide.

Kurt whimpered. "What are you doing?"

Blaine pulled away, tracing with his fingers instead. "Do you want me to stop?"

"No." It was barely more than a whisper.

Blaine kissed him again, a teasing dance of his tongue not an inch from the cleft. "I just... the way you moved, you're so flexible, Kurt, and your hips–" He squeezed his free hand over the hard bone of Kurt's left hip. "Fuck, I can't stop thinking about other situations now. Other times where you would move like this." His right hand sped up a little and Kurt moaned loudly, his gloved hands tangling in his own hair for lack of purchase.

"Tell me." Kurt panted out.

"Like... your hips moving like that when... when you're in me."

Kurt whimpered, his hips snapping forward to fuck faster into Blaine's fist, and in a moment of boldness, Blaine sucked two fingers into his mouth, barely resisting rubbing his aching erection against Kurt's calf. He slipped his slick fingers down the crack of Kurt's ass until his fingertip slid over the tight bud of Kurt's hole.

They'd never done this before, not yet. Blaine couldn't hold in a moan. "Or... or you riding me, my cock so deep in you, just... there." He rubbed tiny, feverish circles around the opening.

He hoped it wasn't too much, that Kurt wouldn't jerk away. What he never expected was Kurt actually pressing against his hand until Blaine's slick fingertip was breaching him, just a little. Then a little more, to the first knuckle, and then Kurt was just fucking himself faster and faster between Blaine's grip and his finger dipping shallowly into Kurt's hole and holy shit, Blaine could come just from the sounds Kurt made and the hot squeeze of his muscles. His fingertip was suddenly the most sensitive part of his body.

Kurt was close, his movements increasingly erratic, his fingers still tugging at his own hair.

"I want to." He gasped. "Fuck, Blaine, I do. Soon."

Blaine had to bite down on the firm flesh of Kurt's ass, the rush of the promise almost too much to bear. Which didn't really help, considering that Kurt came with a cut off cry a few seconds later, the wave of his release and the clench of his hole pulling Blaine along like a tide.

Blaine still felt like he was floating a few feet above ground the next day in school. Nothing had changed, not really, and yet it seemed like a huge step had been taken, one that made the air between him and Kurt charged and electric, and kept Blaine in the state of lingering arousal all day because... soon.

He literally bounced to the auditorium that afternoon and had to firmly tell himself a few times that Something Coming was not a song about his sex life before he could come up on stage and keep a straight face instead of breaking out into an insane grin. Kurt wasn't in the audience yet – he had to urgently talk to Rachel, although Blaine had no idea why discussing Romeo and Juliet couldn't wait until tomorrow – and Blaine felt a little pang of disappointment, but he got over it quickly. He wasn't here to serenade Kurt, after all.

The audition went smoothly. Being on stage was a feeling incomparable to anything else for Blaine, and being the only one there this time, no background singers or dancers, just the orchestra, was a delicious kind of thrill. He'd almost forgotten how special it felt after his year with the Warblers, where he'd always been a part of the team. Adrenaline bubbled happily in his veins, he felt alive, like he was one with the song, his body and voice in perfect harmony, his focus undivided. Finishing the performance felt like resurfacing after a long deep dive, the ovation he received like a breath of sweet fresh air. Oh, he was so going to get Bernardo.

He was almost off the stage when Artie's voice stopped him.

"Wait. Would you mind reading for Tony?"

There was just a split second of hesitation, Blaine's heart jumping up before his brain had time to engage, but it was gone in a flash. He was shaking his head already when the hurt registered, bright and deep in his mind. Disappointment. Betrayal.

Kurt was here.

"I'm sorry, but no. I'm not interested in the role of Tony." Blaine couldn't see their faces, blinded with the bright stage lights, but he heard the surprised murmurs.

Then Kurt's voice cut loud and clear through the acoustics of the room. "Blaine, it's okay. Do it."

The voice came from the side, maybe one of the balconies, and again he couldn't see Kurt's face, but the flash of emotions radiating from him was gone now. Still, Blaine shook his head. "Kurt–"

"Read for Tony. It's fine." That edge of finality was something Blaine knew very well and had long learned not to argue with. Still hesitant, he looked at the trio in front of him.

"I... okay, I guess I could try."

It didn't take much to shake off the initial discomfort and slip seamlessly into the role. But when he finished fifteen minutes later, Kurt was gone. He wasn't in any of the balconies or backstage, or outside the auditorium. By the time Blaine got out into the parking lot, he already knew Kurt's car wouldn't be there.

"I won't take the role if they offer." Blaine said as soon as the door opened.

Kurt just shook his head and moved aside to let him in. His face was calm, but there was just a hint of red in his eyes that told Blaine everything.

"Can we not talk about it today?" Kurt asked quietly.

"But I don't have to, really–"

"Please. Not today."

Blaine nodded, resigned. "Okay. Do you want to watch a movie?"

They still didn't talk about the play the next day at school. Kurt was in a somber mood, a little absent from the moment they met by his locker in the morning, and then Brittany's surprise performance during lunch electrified the school and shattered the rest of Kurt's composure. They spent the rest of the day watching the poll results shift and discussing countermeasures that could still be taken, and by the time Blaine came home that night, his heart ached. This was really getting to Kurt.

He fell asleep trying to think of ways to comfort his boyfriend and improve his mood – ways that didn't necessarily include sex.

So when Kurt found him on the staircase the next morning, with a smile and a bouquet of roses in his hand, it felt as if he'd stepped in from another story entirely. And when his smile didn't falter, his eyes warm as he told Blaine what he'd learned from his mole in the casting office, Blaine didn't really know what to say. Before he could decide between blushing at the compliments (and he hadn't thought Kurt had stayed long enough to see that he "killed his audition") and ensuring him that he wasn't going to take the role anyway (which seemed kind of rude after Kurt's words), Kurt did one more completely unexpected thing.

He kissed him.

Right in the middle of the staircase, with people milling around and half the school on the courtyard below, Kurt pulled him close and pressed a soft, chaste kiss to Blaine's lips. And then he took Blaine's free hand and led him down to one of the unoccupied benches in a quiet corner of the courtyard.

It was only when they were seated that Blaine spoke.

"Thank you. But you know I'm not going to take this role, even if they do give it to me. It's yours; I can have a lead next year."

Kurt shook his head. "No, you're going to take it. I don't want you to hold back because of me. If we're both going to be performers, it's inevitable we will be competitors sometimes. We'll have to learn to navigate it, and this is as good a moment as any. Better, even, while we're still in high school."

"But your NYADA application–" Blaine frowned.

"I'll have to manage without it. Don't worry. Besides, they won't take me as Tony anyway. I'm..." Kurt's voice broke minutely and he cleared his throat. "Apparently I'm too much of a lady."

Blaine gasped. "You're not!"

Kurt shrugged, looking at his shoes. "It was a quote. I overheard them talking before your audition. I just don't pass well enough. I ‘don't excite the lady parts’, as they phrased it." He forced out a humorless laugh, and Blaine felt anger spike high and hot.

"God, how can they even say something like that?"

Kurt looked at him with a shadow of a smile and took his hand. "It's alright. I'm mostly used to people saying those things. It's just that usually they're not teachers, you know? So it got to me a little. But I'm fine now. I want you to take this role and be awesome, okay?"

With such sincerity in Kurt's eyes, all Blaine could do was intertwine their fingers and nod.

***

Kurt was sure his bad luck must be over now. Between the Julliard fiasco, Brittany as a surprise opponent and the Tony audition, these last few weeks were rough and left him with a painful lack of control over his own endeavors. But it should be better now. It was his senior year, after all, and it was supposed to be magic, with Blaine here at McKinley and everything. Life was bound to give him a break now.

Except life clearly hadn't gotten the memo.

During the next week Brit kept gaining in the polls no matter how hard Kurt worked on getting his anti-bullying message out to people. The funding for the musical was cut, forcing him to convince his father to help them out – with some unexpected consequences for his family when the blowup with Coach Sue somehow led to his dad deciding to run for Congress.

But the hardest hit came from a completely unexpected direction: Rachel, panicked after her "Maria-off" with Mercedes, decided to join the presidential race. No matter that she didn't have anything interesting to offer the school if she won, or that she didn't really need this particular point in her application, or even that she knew how much Kurt did need it, in comparison.

It was the last straw, the final blow in a friendship that had already been so challenged lately, and it hurt. It really did.

"Rachel, in ten years when you look back at this time, you're not gonna be thinking about the clubs you belonged to or the roles you had. You'll be thinking about the friends you had and the ones you just tossed aside."

He left her standing by the lockers alone, and didn't look back once.

He'd have to find another roommate in New York, after all.

The cast list went up on Friday. Blaine got Tony. Maria was double-casted between Rachel and Mercedes.

Kurt got Officer Krupke.

He hugged his boyfriend and tried his very, very best not to let the disappointment show on his face.

***

Blaine got up the stairs and looked around, breathing in the smell of old wood and floor polish. It felt like home – like the place you left at some point and only visited on holidays and vacations, bringing back fond memories. He smiled and followed the well-known path to the senior commons, where the Warblers would be practicing right now. The wad of West Side Story tickets were stuffed in his pocket.

He didn't regret leaving Dalton. He was adapting well in his new school despite his initial worries, his relationship with Kurt was solid, going even further than ever, and he'd just gotten the lead in the school musical.

Life was really damn good.