Waking up on New Year's day was anything but pleasant. The party was wild and Nick already regretted that he let it get out of control. His head hurt and he felt nauseous. It was past noon and everything was too bright even though the curtains on his windows were pulled down. He groaned and rolled out of bed, heading straight to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee and find something greasy to eat. That should help, right?

He put coffee beans into the coffee maker. The sound of grinding filled the room and Nick groaned again, cursing himself for not thinking about making an instant coffee instead.

"What the hell?!" Kurt's head appeared from behind the sofa cushions in the adjoined living room. Nick, startled, dropped the mug he was holding on the tile floor. The glass broke with a deafening noise.

"Oh, my god! Would you just stop it?" Kurt whined. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"I'm sorry, man. I forgot you were crashing with us," Nick apologized, kneeling down and picking up broken glass from the floor. "Wanna coffee?" He asked with a hope that Kurt would take coffee as a redemption and wouldn't be bitchy about Nick waking him up unceremoniously.

"What the fuck, guys?!" Jeff merged into the kitchen, his appearance similar to the men already in the room. "I almost had a heart attack! Are you crazy?"

"Sorry," Nick murmured quietly.

"Just make me some coffee before I have to go," Kurt ordered and Nick went back to his first intention from a few minutes ago.

"Where do you wanna go? At least have breakfast with us."

"It's almost one in the afternoon. It's a bit late for breakfast, don't you think?"

"Perfect time for New Year's breakfast," Jeff replied and shoved his head into the fridge.

"I'm sorry but I don't think I'm in any condition to digest anything," Kurt admitted. "I'm gonna pass breakfast today."

"Why are you in a hurry?" Nick asked Kurt as he handed him a cup of coffee.

"I have to go home, check on Rachel and then go grocery shopping. "

"Check on Rachel and go grocery shopping?" Jeff raised his eyebrows like it was the most stupid thing he could do on New Year's day.

"She left the party with this guy, you know...James or something. I need to make sure she's okay. And Blaine is coming home tomorrow night so I need to get some supplies because my fridge is empty. I want to cook dinner for him. And bake a cake. And clean up. How am I gonna do all of that? I feel like I'll be sporting this hangover for a week! God, why did I let you get me so drunk?"

"Hey!" Nick and Jeff protested.

"Okay," Kurt raised his hands. "Okay. I know I was whining, you needed to do something."

"You were kind of a buzzkill when you started singing odes about your boyfriend. I don't really care how hot he is. Or how his eyes have the prettiest color. Or how his eyelashes are the longest you've seen..."

"Or how his kisses are to die for," Nick stepped in. "You were impossible after few drinks so we had no choice but put some more in you and shut you up."

"I miss him, okay?

"Yeah, we figured that out."

"You guys are mean to me. I'm gonna finish my coffee in silence and go."

They sat behind the kitchen counter, sipping on their coffee quietly. Jeff was chewing on cookies straight from the package after he decided he was too lazy to make some breakfast right away, sending glances at Kurt who pretended not to notice it.

"About that dinner..." Jeff started, grinning. "Can we crash it?"

Kurt put his mug on the counter and glared daggers at him. "Absolutely not."

"But Kurt, we miss Blaine too. It's very selfish of you to hog him all to yourself."

Kurt rolled his eyes and stood up. "Don't you dare to come tomorrow. You have to be at the theater in the evening anyway."

"Yeah, but we're always hungry after the show..."

"Don't Jeffrey," Kurt warned him firmly. "No matter how hungry you will be, pizza delivery will have to be enough. We're doing H&C house party for the kids in the afternoon together and then you'll get lost. I'm gonna enjoy dinner with my beautiful boyfriend and you can come the day after tomorrow and empty the contents of the fridge but I don't wanna see you before noon that day. Are we clear?"

"And he seemed so nice when we met him," Jeff sighed, winking at Nick.

"Seriously, guys," Kurt pleaded. "I know you haven't seen him for as long as I haven't seen him, but I really need to have the evening just for ourselves."

"Of course," Jeff nodded. "We really put too many drinks in you yesterday if you think that we would come and ruin your dinner. I was just teasing you. Don't worry."

"I'm too tired to tell the difference between you being a moron and you being a different kind of moron, Jeff."

Jeff just shot him a wide smile. "I'm a sweetheart. You know that. Even your step mom told me that. As your father says, Carol is always right."

"Good luck with dealing with him today," Kurt told Nick empathetically.

"I won't be dealing with him. I'm going back to sleep. I shouldn't have gotten out of bed in the first place."

"You woke us up only to go back to sleep? You suck!" Jeff threw a cookie at him, missing him by about two feet.

"No wonder Dalton didn't want you on their baseball team. You can't even throw a cookie."

"Shut up, Nick."

"I'll leave you two now before I get into something I don't want to be involved in. Thanks for letting me stay on your couch. Thanks for coffee and I'd be very grateful if I could use your shower."

"There are clean towels in the cabinet in the bathroom. I'm afraid we don't have a spare toothbrush, though, so you can shower but your teeth will have to wait till you're home."

"Shower is fine. I'll do the rest at home." Kurt left for the bathroom and Nick stood up, his coffee mug still almost full.

"I'm going to bed. I can't keep my eyes open any longer."

"What am I supposed to do? You're no fun, Duval. You do this every year. Who leaves their best friend alone on New Year's day?"

"Go ice skating at Rockefeller center. You love it," Nick said, slowly dragging his form back into his room.

"You have three hours. In three hours I'm gonna put the music on, very loudly, and it won't stop until you are fully awake and ready to socialize with me!" Jeff shouted after him, but he wasn't sure Nick heard him. He took a bite of another cookie and looked around. There wasn't really much to do unless he wanted to spend the day in front of the TV or browsing the net. Kurt's grocery shopping didn't sound that crazy after all. Maybe he would let him hang around.

Cooper watched his brother the whole day. He could tell something was wrong. Blaine tried to act like nothing was out of order, but the way he barely talked and looked like a deer caught in the headlights when someone approached him was enough for Cooper to know something was bothering his younger brother. He wondered if anything had happened at the benefit the previous day. As a host, he didn't get to spend much time with his family, but for all he knew, Blaine was with his parents for most of the evening. He earned a few strange looks from Blaine throughout the day when his brother caught him staring, but none of them commented on it.

Besides Blaine's strange behavior, nothing happened on New Year's day. They were lazily hanging out at Cooper's house, enjoying the last day together since Blaine and their parents were leaving the very next day.

As the day turned to the evening, Victoria and Frederic decided to take a walk by the ocean, which left the two young Andersons alone.

"Coop?" Blaine asked as soon as the door closed behind his parents.

"Yes?"

"I need a favor." Cooper just raised his eyebrows and nodded at Blaine to continue.

"I booked a flight for tomorrow morning. Could you give me a lift?"

"I'm sorry. Can you repeat that? I just heard you booked a flight."

"I did."

"You BOOKED a flight? YOU?"

"Forget it. I'll just call the cab." Blaine turned around, ready to walk away.

"No!" Cooper grabbed him by the hand, forcing him to sit down next to him.

"You want me to take you to the airport?"

"Yes."

"What about mom and dad? You were supposed to go by your plane in the afternoon."

"I know. They'll still go. The flight is scheduled."

"Blaine, could you give me more? I'm not in the mood to dig everything out of you so it would be nice if you just told me what is going on."

"I have a ticket. For tomorrow...the first morning flight to NYC. First class but still a regular flight. Mom and dad are taking my plane in the afternoon as we agreed before."

"But why?"

"I wanna try it. I don't know if I will be able to go through with it but I want to at least try. I need you to stay in the parking lot in case I change my mind, though."

"So I'm taking you to the airport, then I'm waiting to see whether you actually board the plane or not."

"Well, that's my plan..."

"You sure about this, Blaine?" Cooper gave him a concerned look and Blaine shifted a bit under his gaze.

"Not really. That's why I haven't told anyone except you. Maybe I won't get out of the car and we will just go back to your house. I don't know how I'll feel tomorrow."

"How do you feel today?"

"Like fainting. My stomach is doing flips every time I think of it...I just want to get on that damn plane, Coop and fly to New York."

"Why are you doing this? I don't understand. Maybe you shouldn't go alone. Try this with me on the plane or with the guys. It would be a lot easier if someone was with you, Blaine."

"No," Blaine shook his head. "I have to do it on my own. Please, don't say a word to anyone and let me do it on my own."

"Okay. When is your flight?"

"5:30"

"A.M.? Are you kidding me? Couldn't you chose more convenient time?"

"No. There's more likely to be less people early in the morning than during the day."

"You're lucky I love you, little brother, otherwise I wouldn't even consider this."

"Thank you. I really appreciate it."

"Now this is where you tell me you love me back, squirt."

"I love you back, Coop," Blaine rolled his eyes while confessing his feelings towards his older brother and got hit by a cushion. He laughed all the way to his room as Cooper was lamenting about his ingratitude and lack of respect for his elders.

Blaine couldn't sleep that night, not that it surprised him. He got up several times and headed to Cooper's room to cancel their morning program, always returning when he got halfway there. He was not going to fail, he decided. Not before he at least tried to enter the departure lounge. He already felt like a big disappointment for just thinking about giving up hours before the flight was due.

Being impulsive didn't suit Blaine Anderson well. Or that's what Blaine Anderson thought. Booking a flight ticket and not telling anyone about it for days was something he would have never expected himself to do. Yet, here he was, nervous and nauseous with the mere thought of what the next morning could possibly bring. There were thousands of things that could go wrong. With his anxieties and tendency toward panic attacks, there was a big possibility of the catastrophe occurring.

Then, there was Kurt and his beautiful, smiling face when he would see Blaine at the door, hours before he was supposed to arrive. And for that smile, Blaine was ready to attempt anything.

Blaine was tired when he got in his brother's car. He closed his eyes only for a second but in the end slept all the way to the airport. When they parked the car near the entrance of LAX, Blaine stayed glued to his spot, looking outside the window and weighing his options. There weren't many people, but still enough to make him scared for his life. His wildly beating heart wasn't helping a bit and by the way Cooper was watching him, he must look exactly how he felt.

"We can go back home, Blaine. I mean, it's enough you even considered coming here. One step at a time, okay?"

"I have to go inside. There is no point of getting this close only to give up."

"I'm not letting you go inside when you have difficulty just breathing."

"I'm fine. Just stay here, okay? I'll call you right before boarding."

"Blaine," Cooper sighed. "Lets go home."

"Thanks for the ride. I love you. I hope not to see you soon."

"If anything goes wrong, I want you to call me and I'll come inside for you, do you hear me?"

"I will. I promise. Now, let me go before I change my mind."

Cooper got out his car and opened the trunk, giving Blaine his suitcase. He didn't like this at all. Blaine's hand was shaking as he was taking the handle of his suitcase. Cooper wanted to drag him back to the car and drive back home but he was in no position to order his younger brother to comply. They were both adults now. Besides, even though Blaine looked very nervous and on the verge of a panic attack, there was a determination in his eyes. And Cooper hadn't seen that kind of determination in Blaine's eyes for a long time. He still clearly remembered how Blaine used to be as a child - never ready to give up - always doing anything possible to succeed. Be it a difficult math homework, getting a solo or persuading his friend to go to the Sadie Hawkins dance, Blaine always worked his ass off to accomplish things he had set his goals on. Nowadays, determination came only for work related stuff. Blaine hardly admitted his personal issues, let alone did something about them.

After the mall panic attack, their parents had made him see a therapist. Blaine had tried it but given up six sessions in. He'd never approached the topic after, no matter how much his family and friends were trying to get him talk about it and return to the therapy until he is fully recovered.

What Cooper was afraid of was that determination, on its own, might not be enough. He truly thought his brother should continue to see a therapist. He had faith in him but didn't believe Blaine could conquer this on his own.

At the end, he just said: "Have a nice flight, Squirt." Copper patted him on the shoulder and Blaine gave him a weak smile.

"Thanks. I gotta go."

Cooper returned to his car. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel for the first ten minutes until the sound bothered him too much to continue. He then went through radio stations for what seemed like a thousand times, only to decide that he wasn't in the mood for music after all. He leaned his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. He was tired. He could use a little nap, while waiting for Blaine's call. He was just entering dreamland when his phone started ringing. He swiftly shifted it out of his pocket.

"Blaine?"

"Coop, I don't think I can do this..."

Kurt looked around his kitchen and regretted that he'd ever let Nick and Jeff talk him into helping him with cookies and cupcakes for the kids.

The word 'mess' didn't even start to cover the state in which his kitchen was right now. He literally had to stop food fights Nick and Jeff started between baking and decorating the cupcakes. Still, the damage was done and his kitchen looked like a battlefield.

"Okay, finish up and help me clean this mess," Kurt told them when he decided it was time to cut their fun short.

"I wanted to add more icing on this one, " Nick pouted as Kurt took a cupcake from his hand and put it in the box.

"There's more icing than there is cake already, Nick! I think that's enough. Come on, Jeff. Put it down, we don't have time for this."

"You ruined the fun, Kurt," Nick complained. "This is the first time we've done this. Let us enjoy it."

"I'm sorry your childhood sucked, guys but I need to clean this mess up before we leave. I won't have time when I come back from H&C House. Blaine is supposed to be here at eight. I have to cook dinner for him."

"Okay."

"And you should probably go home to change. This was a crime to your clothes."

"Okay."

"God, don't give me this attitude, Jeff. I'll make us some sandwiches for lunch but I need a spotless kitchen to do that. So will you help me?"

"Sure. When can we do it again, though? We should have party with kids more often."

"We can do it again anytime you want. In your kitchen, though."

"No problem. Or maybe we could do it at Blaine's. He has a cleaning service." Kurt shook his head, laughing. He was pretty sure Nick would convince Blaine to hold a baking contest in the near future just so he could cover cupcakes in unhealthy amounts of icing.

With the three of them at the task, the cleaning didn't take as much time as Kurt assumed at first. They had lunch as Kurt promised and then he set them off. He had two hours before he would have to go to H&C House. Perfect time for a brief relax. He just sat down on the sofa with a magazine in his hand when there was a knock on his door.

"Rachel!" He shouted. "I think your date is here!" Rachel strolled out her room, slightly panicked.

"We were supposed to meet at the restaurant! He shouldn't be here! I'm not ready yet! Jesus, I knew a lunch date was a stupid idea! Who in their right mind goes on a date at noon?"

"Well, someone is at the door. I don't expect anyone so it surely will be yours."

"How do you know that?" Rachel asked as she walked to the hallway.

"Because I threatened Nick and Jeff with death if I see them sooner than three sharp at H&C House." Kurt yelled after her. Then, he opened the magazine and put his feet on the coffee table.

"It's your date, Kurt. Not mine!" Rachel shouted back before opening the door. Kurt didn't bother to stand up. If Nick or Jeff wanted something, they would have to come to him. He heard murmured voices from the hallway and then Rachel walked past him back to her room.

"Guys, did you forget something?" Kurt asked, flipping the pages.

"Guys? You have guys that could forget something in here?" Kurt raised his eyes from the magazine, blinking slowly at his stupidly smiling boyfriend before he jumped off the couch, rushing to him.

Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt as soon as he threw himself on him. Kurt nuzzled his nose into Blaine's neck, breathing him in and loving how Blaine put a small kiss somewhere between Kurt's ear and cheek, running his hands up and down his back.

"Don't you want a kiss, honey?" Blaine asked playfully when Kurt didn't move for a solid minute. "I heard my kisses are to die for."

Kurt pulled away in an instant and smacked his shoulder. "Who told you that?"

"Jeff," Blaine laughed and framed Kurt's face in his hands, bringing him in for a chaste kiss.

"What are you doing here? I was expecting you this evening. Where are your parents?"

"They are still in LA. Their travel plans didn't change."

"How did you get here then? You were all supposed to take your plane."

"I took a regular flight," Blaine stated with a big grin. "First class, bought the whole row of seats but I'm here so who cares."

"You what?!"

"I didn't want to wait until evening..." Blaine explained. "I booked the tickets as soon as I knew I wouldn't be coming back for Nick and Jeff's party."

"Why didn't you tell me? I could have picked you up at the airport!"

"I..." Blaine bit his lips nervously, staring at the wall behind Kurt's head. "I didn't know if I would be able to go through it. I didn't want to promise to come and then have to call you to say that I couldn't get on the plane..."

"Oh, sweetie," Kurt hugged him tight once more, "I wouldn't be mad at you if you didn't do it."

"But you would be disappointed...I booked an early morning flight to get to you as soon as possible. I had doubts, though...that the need to see you wouldn't be enough to get past my fear."

"You are unbelievable, Blaine Anderson," Kurt whispered into his ear. "And I love you so much."

"I love you, too. I missed you like crazy, Kurt." Kurt turned his head slightly and captured Blaine's lips with his own. The kiss started slow but neither of them really wanted to keep any restraint so it progressed into deep and heated in no time. Kurt eagerly explored Blaine's mouth with his tongue, giving up the dominance every time they needed to come up for air, but retrieving into passionate kisses the minute their lungs got at least a bit of oxygen.

"Take it to your room, Kurt," Rachel said behind him, rudely interrupting them. "I gotta go, boys. Say hi to the kids and tell them I'm going to visit next week, okay?"

"Okay," Kurt nodded absently, his gaze fixed at Blaine.

"I'll talk to you later. Now let me get to my coat," Rachel squeezed herself between them, effectively getting through the entrance to the hallway they were blocking.

"Come on, sweetie," Kurt tugged at Blaine's hand, leading him into the kitchen. "Aren't you hungry? I'll make you lunch."

"I'm not hungry, Kurt. I ate on the plane. Let's lay down for a bit, okay? I'm tired as hell."

"Okay. We have some time before I have to go to H&C House."

"I'll go with you."

"Really?" Kurt beamed at him.

"Yeah."

Kurt was lying on the sofa, his legs tangled with Blaine's who had his back against the cushion and his head on Kurt's shoulder. Kurt's fingers were playing with Blaine's curls, and Blaine sighed contently every time Kurt dropped a kiss on the top of his head.

"I think I'm gonna fall asleep here," Kurt broke the silence.

"Tired?" Blaine asked, raising his head a bit to rest his chin on Kurt's chest.

"Tired, lazy, happy..."

"So are you having a good day?"

"I'm having a great day."

"What is the difference between good and great day?"

"You coming home earlier and also Kurt and Blaine gingerbread men you made with your mom...I can't believe you brought them with you."

"Those are for keeps. We are not eating them," Blaine announced seriously.

"Of course we aren't. We can use them as a decorations next year." Blaine bit his lip and beamed at him, his whole face glowing in the light from the Christmas tree that Rachel refused to take down yet. Kurt outstretched his hand to grab his phone, opening his camera application to capture his boyfriend's beauty.

"Smile," he ordered and Blaine chuckled but did as he was told.

"Perfect. This one is for my lockscreen."

"Next year, huh?" Blaine asked timidly.

"What about next year, sweetie?" Kurt put his phone down and looked at his boyfriend who just shrugged his shoulders, avoiding the eye contact.

"You said we can use gingerbread Kurt and Blaine as decorations next year," Blaine answered, his cheek turning red. He felt stupid now. It was just one sentence Kurt said to him, probably not even giving it a second thought and here Blaine was, weighing it as a wedding proposal. Next year. Twelve months from now. Would they still be together? As in love as they were in this moment or maybe more?

"You don't want to?"

"I would love that."

"We used to do it with my mom. Saving the prettiest gingerbread men for the next year. I haven't done it since she died."

"What else did you used to do with her at Christmas?"

"We baked a lot. She always made punch and eggnog for me. Non alcoholic, of course, but she made both so I had a choice in my drink. We decorated our windows with white markers. We painted Santa Claus and snowmen, Christmas trees and stars...And she drew Rudolph. Everything was white but his nose. It was bright red and she let me color it. It was funny... She loved to sing Christmas songs with me. We often danced in our kitchen or living room...My dad loved watching us having fun. And we never had a turkey for Christmas dinner. She cooked a roast beef."

"A roast beef?"

"Yes. She used to say that turkey is for Thanksgiving. We had roast beef for Christmas dinner every year until my dad married Carol."

"What happened then?"

"Carol used to make a turkey. The first year we spent as a new family, it wasn't up for discussion. When I protested, my dad told me to let it go. I was so mad. It seemed like he wanted to forget all the traditions we had. Carol didn't know about anything. She tried to consult us about everything but my dad did all the talking for the two of us and told her that whatever she wanted was fine with us. It was a very sad Christmas for me. Nothing was as it should have been. I was pissed and moody all the time. I snapped at my dad, at Finn and even at Carol without a reason. God, I was horrible that year. I didn't eat much at Christmas dinner and excused myself right after. I spent the evening in my room. My dad came and gave me a pep talk but it didn't really help. Just made me more grumpy...Carol brought me a warm milk before she went to bed and she was very sad. She told me she was sorry for whatever she or Finn did to make me angry. She wanted to know what she could do to make it up to me."

"What did you say to her?"

"I was awful. I told her that she can't do anything because Christmas was already ruined for me. God, I was such a diva back then...She started crying and it slapped some sense in me. The poor woman had no idea what it was all about and I knew it wasn't fair to take my anger on her. I told her that nothing about the Christmas was like we used to do it. She asked how we used to do it and I told her everything. In the end we came up with a plan how to mix our traditions together. Since then, we have a turkey one year and roast beef the next one."

Blaine tightened his hold on Kurt's waist, snuggling closer to him. Kurt didn't talk much about his past, and if he did, he usually reminisced funny stories that had happened in the glee club or with their cheerleading coach. It was rare that he opened up and let Blaine see more of what he had gone through. What amazed Blaine the most was that Kurt never refused to answer his questions. He might not talk about his past by himself but as soon as Blaine had something to ask about it, he always gave an answer. Blaine appreciated it and even though he wanted to know a lot more than he did now, he didn't touch the topic too often. The side effect of talking about Kurt's mom or unpleasant events from his life back in Ohio was Kurt being tense and gloomy... and Blaine would rather see his boyfriend content and happy.

"We always have a turkey," Blaine spoke softly after Kurt silenced himself. "I don't think it's a tradition. It's the only thing my mom knows how to cook."

"Do you have any Christmas traditions?"

"Not really. Cooper likes to do something stupid every year just so we don't forget about him but besides that, nothing uncommon."

"Cooper has a habit of doing stupid things regularly. What's the difference between him being a Cooper in general and him being a Cooper at Christmas?"

"Well," Blaine started, pensively. "I guess, there isn't much of a difference but his Christmas shenanigans just stand out amongst other things he's ever done. Probably because we tend to remember them since it's Christmas and not any ordinary day. Have I ever told you how he lost me in Central Park when I was nine?"

"No," Kurt shook his head with a big smile, sensing a great story coming.

"As a kid I loved the central park zoo. When our parents had enough of us bickering, they sent us there. It was a big punishment for Cooper, especially as he got older. That year he decided he wasn't going to join me in the zoo. He bought me a ticket and told me to meet him at the gate in three hours. "

"He left you alone?"

"Yeah. But I didn't care. I loved that I was finally a big boy who could be in the Zoo on his own."

"Did you get lost?"

"No. Please, honey, what do you think of me? I enjoyed my three hours between animals and then went straight to the gate. I waited for Cooper for half an hour when I realized he was not going to show up."

"Oh my god! He left you there?!"

"Yes. Fortunately, I knew how to get to the penthouse from there so I just walked home."

"Where the hell was your brother?"

"On a date with a girl he met five minutes after we parted our ways at the Zoo."

"That's so Cooper," Kurt laughed and Blaine joined him.

"He was grounded for two months after that. Another time, when we were sixteen, he made Jeff lighten his eyebrows."

"He did what?!"

"Yeah, Cooper helped Jeff peroxide his eyebrows so they'd match the shade of his blonde hair. It was apparently the biggest hit in LA at the time."

"I guess it didn't go well..."

"No. Jeff spent his Christmas with orange eyebrows until my mom decided that he suffered enough and she colored them back to normal. Two years ago he convinced Nick to go on a double date with him and he accidentally set Nick up with a girl Jeff used to fool around with."

"That must have been awkward."

"And let's not forget the Christmas when he was seventeen and told our parents that his girlfriend was pregnant."

"Oh my god!"

"Wait, that's not the punchline. He wasn't dating anyone at the time. He just somehow reversed his car into dad's old and beloved Chevrolet. He needed something worse than destroying dad's vintage car so they would see the damage of the car as less of a big deal."

Kurt laughed again, loud and long. It was like music to Blaine's ear. He often thought of asking Kurt to record his laugh just so he could listen to it when they weren't together and he missed him. He never asked him though. He felt a bit creepy just thinking about it. Saying it out loud would be mortifying. He was not gonna make a fool of himself in front of his boyfriend. Still, making Kurt laugh was on his daily to-do list.

"I miss this the most when we are apart," Blaine admitted. "Just holding you, being close to you."

Kurt dropped a kiss on the top of Blaine's hair. He missed this, too. They could talk on the phone or Skype, even fool around if they wanted to but the simple touch couldn't be replaced that easily as conversation or sex. Science and technology weren't that far yet. Amongst all the things Kurt missed when Blaine was away, Blaine's actual presence stood out...knowing that if he needed to, he could just go and be with his boyfriend. Kurt didn't mind Blaine being busy in New York with whatever promotional stuff he had to do because he was still in the city and there was the option of seeing him as he pleased.

"You are going to be in the city this month, right?"

"I have to go to LA twice, but just for couple days. I told my team to cut my activities to a minimum. I'm gonna promote the tour next month and I want to have some time for myself until I can."

"Does the time for yourself involve time with me as well?"

"I don't know, Kurt. I mean, I can spare you some time but don't count on it," Blaine said seriously, earning a shove from his boyfriend.

"Jerk!" Blaine chuckled at Kurt's offended expression, keeping his arms strongly around him as Kurt tried to slip from his hold.

"Come on, honey. What kind of answer do you expect for a stupid question? Of course I wanna spend my time with you."

"How did you convince them to let you breathe?" Blaine stayed silent for a minute. He considered whether telling Kurt the truth would be the best thing to do. He could keep things from Kurt, omissions that seemingly weren't important and would only lead to misunderstandings or fights, so not mentioning them wasn't a big deal. Replying untruly to a direct questions was something else. It was intentional lying and Blaine wasn't a liar.

"They want me to sign another contract with the recording company and I said no."

"What?! Why?"

"I told you before. This life is overwhelming. I don't want to do this anymore. They think that giving me some space will change my mind. But it won't."

"But you love performing. You love doing what you do!"

"I need to get back my privacy."

"No one is violating your privacy, Blaine!"

"Can we not?"

"Can we not what?!"

"Talk about it," Blaine answered quietly. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Great. Another prohibited topic," Kurt huffed, annoyed. "Seriously, you should just give me the list so I'll know what I'm allowed to discuss with you."

"We can get to it later, honey. Just not now, okay?"

"You promise?"

"I promise," Blaine nodded and pecked Kurt's lips several times until he felt Kurt smiling into his small kisses. He bought some time for now, but there was only a little chance that Kurt would let it go completely.