“Cooper is going where?” Kurt asked again. He had just barely woken up and was trying to get his head on straight while Blaine was babbling along, telling him all kinds of news, but talking so fast that Kurt could hardly keep up.

“He was selected to speak at the convention, so hes going to Toronto on Friday. He doesnt want to leave his practice for too long, so hell be back on Wednesday. And guess what? Youll never guess...” Blaine paused for breath and Kurt was able to get a few words in.

“Hes taking Susan?” Kurt guessed. Blaine rolled his eyes.

“Yes, hes taking Susan. How did you guess?”

It was time for Kurt to roll his own eyes. “Duh.”

Blanes eyes got big, but he realized that it was no secret that his brother was in love with his secretary.

“So, I was going to fix you a hearty breakfast before we go to practice,” Blaine promised. He kissed Kurts cheek to encourage him to wake up.

“Im up, Im up...let me go to the restroom and get some clothes on and Ill be right down,” Kurt said, smiling in spite of his grouchy mood. He hated it when Blaine woke up so much earlier than he did. He felt like he was trying to catch up all day when that happened.

“Heres your leg, Beau,” Blaine said, offering Kurt the prosthesis. They had gotten so comfortable with the artificial leg that neither thought much about it any more. There was a time when Kurt would have been self-conscious about Blaine even touching it, but all of that had changed now. It wasnt even something to think about any more.

“Can I do anything to help?” Blaine questioned, shifting his weight from one foot to the other in nervous anticipation.

“Are you in that much of a hurry?” Kurt asked, “Okay, if you want to set out my clothes – I want my white relaxed-fit riding jeans, please, and the aqua and coral plaid cotton pull-over with the leather buttons. Maybe the white vest with the off-set buckles that goes with it? Yeah. No brooch today, I still cant find the cat-and-mouse pin I lost on the field last week,” Kurt elaborated. He smiled at Blaine who looked put upon.

“Oh, and Blaine? Lose the blue polo shirt. Just because we are going to play polo doesnt mean you have to wear Ralph Lauren like its a uniform. I can smell the polyester from here. Put on the shamrock green short sleeved Graham shirt with the off-set black and white pin striped yoke and the seven button placket. The Oxford cloth one,” he said when Blaines face showed he wasnt sure of which shirt Kurt was referring to. He thought his blue polo shirt was fine.

“Wear the black trousers I like...you know which ones. I think theyll work just fine for showing off that fine ass of yours, baby,” Kurt grinned. He loved it when he could make Blaine blush with just words.

“Okay, Beau...Ill change and be all ready when youre done with your morning routine. Then well have breakfast and be at the stables by seven-thirty. I want to get the jump on the rest of the guys and have an hour to practice before they get there.”

“Thank you, Bee. Kiss?”

“Always,” Blaine said, giving him a sweet kiss on the lips before turning to the closet to find the clothes Kurt had asked him to set out.

Blaine dressed quickly, secretly smiling because he loved it when Kurt picked out his clothes. He gave his Beau a hard time over it, of course, but he knew he looked better now than he had before he met Kurt. Hed never had a problem with self esteem concerning his clothes – he wore the things his mother bought without much thought. She had picked out all of his fathers clothes and his dad always looked well-groomed and professional, so he and Cooper had followed along. He sat in the over-stuffed chair for a minute, remembering little things his parents did. Nothing he had spent much time over when they were still alive, but now that he didnt have them anymore, these simple things that seemed insignificant then now became large and important in his mind.

Blaine sighed. He missed them so damn much. It wasnt the heart-wrenching pain of the first year or so, it had changed from that to a general ache that he carried with him all the time – bringing it out to examine from time to time when something triggered his memory. Sometimes it was just a small thing – Coopers slightly lop-sided grin when he watched Blaine on the polo field. He looked just like their dad when he did that. They both had the habit of rubbing the toe of one shoe against the back of their calf, the tell-tale dust stains decorating their trousers at the end of the day.

Sometimes it was just a noise, or a tune, or an odor that sent Blaine down memory lane. Just last week Kurt had made orange-cranberry muffins and the scent spread throughout the house conjuring up memories of Sunday morning breakfast on the wisteria-draped patio: he and Cooper giggling over the comics, his parents drinking their coffee. Sitting on the table was a jug of orange juice, a basket of freshly baked muffins and their plates of poached eggs on toast with spicy sausage, his father eating at least three helpings of the sausage.

“Blaine?”

Kurt stood in the doorway, wrapped in a fluffy robe, a concerned frown on his face.

“Hmm?” Blaine snapped back to reality. “Oh...ah, yeah. I got your clothes out. Theyre sitting on the bed, sweetie.”

Kurt looked at him closer. Sweetie wasnt something Blaine had ever called him before. Blaine looked tired, Kurt could see the lines of stress around his eyes and dark smudges under them. There were no sign of tears, but his eyes were red and looked irritated. He could see the muscles of his jaw tensing – actually, his whole body seemed tense. Kurt walked slowly over to where he sat in the over-stuffed chair and lowered himself down in his lap, his arms snaking around Blaines shoulders, his lips on Blaines neck.

“Whats wrong, baby? I can tell something is bothering you. Is it something I did?” Kurt asked, his big blue eyes searching Blaines face, afraid hed done something to hurt his boyfriends feelings.

Blaine put his arms around Kurt and tugged him close, putting his forehead against Kurts chest.

“No, Beau, you didnt do anything wrong at all. Im okay, just got caught in some memories I guess,” he tried to explain. It was just that he had no words to let Kurt know how he was feeling.

“Im here, baby. You know you can tell me anything, Ill listen,” Kurt said softly. “Tell me what you need, Blaine. Please?”

“I wish I could. It is just ….I dont know. I guess I feel overwhelmed sometimes and for some reason Mom and Dad have just been on my mind lately. It ...it takes me by surprise, actually. Here I was getting ready for the day, I had my clothes all set out – the outfit my own personal fashion consultant had selected for me,” Blaine winked at Kurt, “and something triggered a memory of them – of Mom and Dad. Next thing I knew, you were standing in the doorway in your sexy robe.” Blaine kissed Kurts cheek and walked his fingers up his leg towards the hem of the robe.

Kurt swatted his hand away, smiling back at Blaine.

“Hey, now...I thought we were in a hurry to get to the stable?” Kurt asked, running his finger over Blaines collarbone. Blaine had taken off his shirt, getting ready to change into the one Kurt had chosen.

“Yeah, okay. I would like to get there early,” he said, a little distracted by the thought of Kurts naked skin under the loose robe.

Kurt got up, strolling over to the bed and shedding his robe. He looked over his shoulder and winked at Blaine before sitting on the edge of the bed to pull on his tiny bikini briefs. He made a big show of it, standing up and swaying his hips as he pulled them up, tucking his semi-hard cock into the briefs. He turned his back to Blaine, bending over a bit to get his trousers. He had put his prosthetic foot into one leg of the pants before he felt Blaines warm skin against his back.

“You are just teasing me now,” Blaine whispered into Kurts ear, licking from his collarbone to the sensitive spot in the hollow behind his ear. Kurt gasped, the shivers running down his spine as he melted back into Blaines body. He could feel the skin of Blaines chest, the downy-soft hair that grew there tickling a bit, as he absorbed the warmth.

“Blaine...” Kurt mewed, unable to move because his legs were caught in the trouser legs. He started to fall, jerking his arms forward to break his fall, but Blaine caught him and picked him up with one arm behind his back and the other under his knees. He kissed Kurt, his tongue softly caressing Kurts as he set him on the bed. He followed, straddling his boyfriend and Kurt leaned up to keep the kiss as long as possible.

Kurt started to put a hand down to adjust himself when his erection could no longer be contained by his briefs, but Blaines fingers beat him to it – wrapping around the hard shaft and pushing Kurt back on the mattress.

“Im pretty sure we arent going to be on time for polo practice...” Kurt teased, pressing up on Blaines pecs to give him room to speak.

Blaine shifted his weight so they werent so close to the edge of the bed and winked at Kurt.

“I doubt that anyone will care. Now...lets get these annoying trousers off of you.”

Kurt giggled.

By the time they made it down to breakfast, all dressed, Cooper was just sitting down to his toast and coffee.

“Hey, Squirt. You guys going to ride today?” he asked, his nose still in the morning paper.

“Yeah. Kurt is doing so much better now. I think the practice sessions are really beginning to help, he has shown so much improvement – even over the past two weeks,” Blaine bragged. He was so proud of Kurts progress on his horse.

“Susan told me. I guess Sheila is excited, too. She calls you her protégé, Kurt,” Cooper laughed.

Kurt blushed.

“When was the last time you were on a horse, Coop?” Kurt asked, curious.

“Probably back in high school. I was too busy in med school, and since I was in New York and my horse was here...well, I didnt get home very often to ride. Lucky for me, Squirt took over the care of Aurora. I think she likes him better, anyway.”

“She is a good girl,” Blaine said, a wistful smile on his face. He really did love his horse.

“I can drop you two off at the stable on my way to the office,” Cooper offered.

“Thanks, Cooper!” Kurt said, Blaine nodded, too.

~KB~KB~KB~KB~KB~

“Hey, girl, hows my Misty-girl today?” Kurt said to his horse, catching her bridle to snap on a lead. He took her out and tied the lead to a brass ring on a post in the barn, quickly putting on her bridle, blanket, and saddle. Misty touched noses with Aurora and shook her mane, nickering to her stablemate.

They mounted the horses and were on their way to the field when Misty missed a step, stumbling a bit and coming up lame.

Kurt was behind Blaine and pulled the reins to stop Misty from moving. He was off the horse in a heartbeat, calling for Blaine in a panic.

“Help! Blaine!!!!!” he shouted, his arms around Mistys neck to stop her from putting weight on her lame leg.

Blaine heard the panic in Kurts voice and turned Aurora back, sliding out of the saddle as he pulled up.

“What happened?” he asked, grabbing the reins to hold Misty still. “Hey, sweetie, hold still,” he said in a calming voice. He put his other hand on Kurts shoulder.

“She was just prancing along, and suddenly she wasnt – she kind of cringed and her gait felt funny, so I stopped her. Is she okay? They shoot lame horses, dont they? I dont want anyone to shoot her!” he said, trying to control his voice.

“Hey, Beau. Let me look at her. Well call the vet and see whats up. They dont automatically shoot horses just because they are lame, honey. Now, you hold her head and Ill have a look at her leg,” he said.

Kurt stood at Mistys head, rubbing her jaw and between her eyes, crooning reassurance to her. Blaine leaned down, picking up her left front foot and holding it between his knees. He pushed on the frog, but it looked clean and sprung back like a healthy frog should. He felt up her fetlock, pushing on it, looking for any sore place. He went all the way up her leg, not finding any cuts, bumps, or sore places.

“I dont see anything. Im going to let her foot down and I want you to walk her two or three steps,” Blaine asked, glancing up at Kurt. He looked concerned but not as upset as he did earlier.

Kurt clicked his tongue for her to move and she stepped forward, still favoring the foot.

Just as Blaine got set to pick up her hoof again, another horse loped up. Sebastian stopped, taking in the scene and dismounted.

“Gone lame?” he asked. Kurt nodded.

“See anything?” he asked Blaine.

“No, she doesnt seem to have any sore places I can find, her hoof looks okay...I was just going to check the shoe.”

“I have a hoof pick, hold up,” Seb said, reaching into his pocket to bring out a tool with a fold-out pick. He handed it to Blaine. “Need help?”

“I think Im okay, thanks for the pick,” he answered, sounding preoccupied.

Blaine took the pick and slid it under the shoe, feeling for anything. It only took a moment before he flicked out a sharp rock that was wedged in between the shoe and the tender part of Mistys hoof.

“There you go, sweetheart. Is that better?” Blaine cooed at the skittish horse. She shook her head, pulling back on the reins in Kurts hand. Sebastian patted her flank, rubbing along her back in a calming way.

“I think we got it, Kurt,” Blaine said, gently letting the horses hoof down to the grass. “Let her walk a few steps.”

Misty was reluctant to take a step, but Kurt coaxed her. All eyes were on her leg to see if she was going to limp again. She took one step, neighing loudly in protest, but Kurt rubbed her ears and patted her neck under her mane.

“Cmon, Misty-girl. Come to Papa,” he coaxed and she took several steps forward. The first step she barely touched her foot to the ground, but by the time she was three steps along, there was no limping.

Sebastian grinned. “Good job,” he said to Blaine as he accepted his hoof pick back.

“What happened?” Kurt asked, visions of what he might have done if he was out with Misty alone and this had come up.

“She picked up a sharp rock and it got stuck under her show. It was wedged pretty hard in there, but Blaine got it out. Good man,” he praised the short boy. Blaine smiled at him.

“Thanks for the hoof pick. I need to carry one of those with me,” he said to Sebastian.

“Im glad to be of service,” Seb smiled back. “Here, keep this one. I have another at home.”

“Thats kind of you, thanks,” Blaine nodded at Sebastian. He turned to Kurt: “Id let her walk a bit before you take her for a gallop, maybe put her up for the day. If that gouged a deep hole, she might be sore for a while, poor girl,” Blaine said, petting her nose.

“I can walk back with Kurt if you wanted to get to the field, I saw a couple of the guys in the stable,” Sebastian offered.

“Thanks, but I think Ill stay with them. Maybe well call Sheila and see if we can borrow Sunny for the day,” Blaine said, putting a protective arm around Kurt as they walked back to the stable, going slowly as the horses followed behind.

“Thank you, Seb. That was nice of you,” Kurt smiled at him.

“Youre entirely welcome,” Sebastian called as he saw Jeff riding towards the field and took off after him.

*

“Sunny isnt in her stall,” Kurt said, looking in as he walked over to where she was stabled.

Blaine held up a hand, then finished on his cell.

“No, shes out with Sheila. They went for a ride with the twins. I think Ill put Aurora away and we can go back home today. Im going to call the vet to come check Mistys foot and let Jim, the stablemaster, know so he can get Doc Ketchum in to see her.”

“Okay. Im kind of tired anyway. Im sure we can find something to do today...” Kurt grinned at his boyfriend. After making the calls, they walked back down the road to the Anderson mansion, walking around to the carriage house in back.

“When was the last time you were in your house?” Kurt asked as they walked along the path to the carriage house behind the larger house where Blaine had grown up.

Blaine stopped, looking up to try and remember.

“When we moved the furniture...two years ago,” he said.

“Ah...can I ask you something – but I want your promise you will be completely truthful with me, okay?” Kurt ventured, reaching to take Blaines hand in his. Blaine nodded.

“Okay,” he said, the look on his face telling Kurt that he already knew what the question was.

“Can we...can you and I go inside and look? Im really curious to see where you grew up,” Kurt asked.

Blaine stood still for a brief moment, weighing the emotional responses he was feeling about this. He had always thought Cooper would be the one to go back inside with him, but Coop had his own demons and never wanted to step foot in the house.

“Yeah, I think I can do that,” he said hesitantly, leaning away from Kurt subconsciously. Kurt noticed right away.

“Oh, Bee. We dont need to do it today – Im sorry, I should have given you some warning. We can go watch a movie or maybe drive over to visit Nick and Trent?”

“Theyre probably on the polo field. No, I think Ill be fine going in the house. We do have a housekeeper that dusts and looks after everything in the house. It isnt like some haunted mansion in a Scooby-Do cartoon,” he said sarcastically.

Kurt would have taken offense to the words and tone that came out of Blaines mouth, but he understood the stress that was pounding down on his boyfriend, so he put his arms around him and held him tightly.

“Yeah, I have been thinking about going inside ever since that day I told you about them. I guess theres no time like the present. If I dont go now, Ill regret it because Ill make up all kinds of lame excuses in my head not to go inside. Really, we should either move back in or put it up for sale. Its foolish to just let it sit,” Blaine said.

“Okay, Bee. Lets get back to the carriage house and get the key...” Kurt suggested.

“No need. I have the back door key on my fob right here in my pocket,” Blaine said, producing the key ring after a little searching.

They went inside, Kurt walking close to Blaine as they turned on lights as they went.

“This is the kitchen,” Blaine said, though it wasnt necessary. Kurt gave him an encouraging smile and squeezed his hand. It was a large, comfortable room. In a day when high-end kitchens were almost all done in antiseptic, brushed stainless-steel appliances and black marble countertops, the Anderson kitchen looked friendly and inviting with rock maple cupboards and butcher block counters. There were white lacy curtains at the windows and braided rugs on the floor. Kurt could feel at home in this warm and friendly house.

They walked through the kitchen and down a hall to the dining room, then the living room with its classic turn-of-the-century over-stuffed chairs and chesterfield sofas. The jewel tones in the upholstery and deep, comfortable cushions on all of the pieces made Kurt want to sit down in one of the chairs to read one of the hundreds of books lining the room on oak bookcases. Heavy drapes with cabbage roses in dark colors barred the sunlight from coming in and Kurt stepped carefully so he didnt trip in the dim room.

They walked into each room, Blaine leading Kurt and saying nothing as they toured the house. By the time they reached the dining room, Kurt could feel small tremors in Blaines arm.

“Hey, can we stop for a moment? I need to sit down,” Kurt asks, a nod indicating the chair he would like to use. Blaine stopped.

“Sorry...I didnt mean to hurry you so much. This is affecting me more than I realized it would. I...I.....oh, shit,” Blaine, still standing next to Kurt, put his head down into his hands. Kurt heard him, apparently just muttering to himself: “I didnt think it would be this hard....”

Kurt pulled Blaine into his lap. He found himself doing this more and more often since Blaine had begun opening up more about missing his parents. His arms went around Blaines waist, more of a habit than something that required a thought process by now. Blaine melted into Kurts strong arms, resting his forehead on Kurts shoulder. They sat like that for about ten minutes before Blaine pulled himself together. He sat up, kissing Kurts lips and standing.

“Hey, I think Ill be okay, thank you, Beau. I am working on being more okay with thinking of them. I guess I just need more time than I thought,” Blaine said, dejected and overwhelmed.

“Can I suggest something?” Kurt asked. He had an idea.

“Sure, Babe...what?”

“How about we go back to the kitchen, we will sit down at the kitchen table and you will tell me a story about when you were there with one or both of your parents? It can be just a glimpse, or it could be elaborate, funny or sad....just something to stir your memory of them, reclaim your right to have them with you once again. How does that sound?” Kurt asked. He remembered when his aunt came a year after his mother died. She had asked him his favorite memories of her and it felt good to try to remember instead of trying so damn hard to forget.

Kurt took Blaines hand in his. He was always fascinated by Blaines hands – so strong and large in proportion to his smaller body. His fingers were long and dexterous, finding the keys on his piano or strings on his violin and guitar so easily. They were a beautiful tawny hue of tan and had square nails, always trimmed neatly. It was true he had callouses from playing musical instruments, but other than the fingertips his skin was soft and supple. His hands always felt good on Kurts skin, seeking out the secret places that made him moan. Kurt shook his head, concentrating on what he was doing again.

Kurt led him back to where they started: the kitchen. Blaine pulled out one of the kitchen chairs, a rock maple Windsor with a thick seat pad of blue canvas, and let Kurt sit down, then pushed the chair in.

Blaine sat down in the chair next to him by the bay window, fingers tapping on the table until Kurt took his hand once again.

“What is the story for the kitchen?” he asked. A small bit of a smile showed as Blaine closed his eyes briefly, then opened them to look into Kurts.

“Youre sitting in Coopers chair,” he said. “Mom would sit across from me and Dad in that one,” he indicated. “When I was in junior high school, we had a cook. She was a fairly good cook – making each of us what we wanted for breakfast like a restaurant. But when I was little, I remember Sunday mornings the best. Dad and Mom would get up early and make muffins or coffee cake. Then there were Denver omelets or French toast or poached eggs on toast. Something a bit fancier than we had during the week. Dad read me the comics when he was done with the sections of the paper he liked. I remember trying to brush my hair to look like Prince Valiant. Cooper teased me because of my curls.”

Kurt smiled at his boyfriend. He was smiling at the memory and Kurt hoped with all his heart that it might mean he would heal from his profound grief. He wondered if hed been allowed to grieve when it happened.

“Sometimes in the evening, we would play cards here. Mom fixed some kind of snack – nothing greasy that would get on the cards, of course, but pretzels, celery and carrot sticks, stuff like that. She stuffed cream cheese in the celery. She had these cookie cutters shaped like the card suites...you know, hearts, diamonds, clubs and spades. She made little sandwiches with all kinds of fillings – egg salad, turkey with radishes, different cheeses. I loved it when she made cream cheese with shredded carrots and chopped candied ginger in it. Anyway, she would cut out the sandwiches with the cookie cutters. I would get to help her in the morning and she gave me the leftover pieces when she cut them.

“We played Canasta, Hearts, Gin Rummy, Cribbage...or board games: Life, Monopoly, Risk, Scrabble, or Clue. Wow, I hadnt thought of game night in ages. We had so much fun,” Blaine said with a wistful look, glancing around the table as if his family were all sitting there with him. He shook his head as if to make the vision go away and got up from the chair.

“Lets go into the dining room...” he said, leading Kurt into the formal room with a long walnut table and eight matching chairs. There were several china cabinets with Royal Doulton plates and Waterford crystal glassware. “We always had Thanksgiving in here. My family all came, grandparents, uncles and aunts, cousins and other extended family. Step-neighbors-in-law my dad used to joke,” Blaine laughed at the memory and Kurt chuckled.

“Mom loved to cook back then. There was always an argument. If Aunt Esther and Aunt Lois came, they wanted sage stuffing with oysters. If Grandma Anderson came, she wanted it with sausage and mushrooms; Grandpa Heinz wanted cornbread with jalapeños. Then it was whether to have pumpkin pie or apple, and if it was apple was it served with a slice of cheddar cheese, a scoop of vanilla ice cream, or a dollop of whipped cream,” Blaine told Kurt, “I wish I had a piece of that pie right now.”

“I love apple pie. If you still have your moms recipe, maybe we could make one?” Kurt suggested.

“That would be wonderful,” Blaine said, his eyes getting misty at the suggestion. “Dad would take me out to the orchard and we would pick the apples ourselves. Several different kinds, and bring them home. Mom let me help peel, cut, and seed them. Dad would make the pie crusts and we made a few dozen at a time, bake them half-way and freeze them. Then on a special occasion, she would take one out and bake it. They always tasted fresh-made. Oh, what I wouldnt do for a slice of her pie right now. Cooper and I found the last one still frozen and baked it for Christmas the year we lost them.”

Blaine blinked back tears, but he still had a ghost of a smile at the memory.

And so it went, they walked through the house and Blaine told Kurt a memory for each room. In the music room he remembered the birthday his parents bought him a baby grand piano when he was fourteen. It was still there, of course, and Blaine played a short piece of music that Kurt didnt recognize.

“Probably because you never heard it before. I wrote that the year I went to music camp,” he explained, but didnt say anything more as he got up from the piano and hurried down the hall to the library.

There were sad memories – the summer Blaine had scarlet fever and his mother let him stay in her room. He had a stuffed bunny that went with the book The Velveteen Rabbit sitting on a shelf beside his copy of the book in the library.

“After reading the book, I was convinced I would contract scarlet fever again if I touched the rabbit,” he admitted. Kurt noticed that he still didnt touch it and cringed when Kurt reached for it. He stopped, not wanting to cause any more upset for his boyfriend.

They walked into a glassed in greenhouse on the east side of the house.

“Wow...a greenhouse? I bet you used to have beautiful flowers in here,” Kurt commented.

“This, I will have you know, is the conservatory,” Blaine said, his nose in the air and his eyes crossing. Kurt giggled.

“Ah...and might we find Colonel Mustard in here with a candlestick?” Kurt asked, squeezing his boyfriends hand.

Blaines turn to giggle.

“You never know. Yeah, we had a lot of flowers in here – mostly tropical stuff that dad loved. Mom had orchids. One summer Cooper tried to grow pot! Wow, were my folks angry at him. I think that was the year he left for college,” Blaine said.

Walking into his fathers office, Blaine got a grin on his face. He invited Kurt to sit on a burgundy colored velvet camel-back sofa and rummaged through a drawer in the oak desk before searching a glass-fronted lawyers bookcase.

“Ah, here it is!” Blaine said in triumph, holding an over-sized book with a black cover. He sat next to Kurt, holding the old book reverently on his lap. He opened the front cover and there was printed “Our Baby Boy”. The next page showed a family tree, the branches filled in with names of ancestors and Blaine Devon Anderson neatly printed in the center.

“Your parents couldnt have filled this in, Bee. I can read it,” he laughed.

“Oh, very funny,” Blaine snipped, but he had a smile under his fake grump.

The scrap book held pictures of a sweet faced baby boy, his curly hair evident even from the first. His huge eyes seemed to take up three quarters of his face with a sober look. In the next picture he was wearing a little sailor suit and Cooper was holding him on his lap. Coop was eleven years older than Blaine, but they looked enough alike nobody would miss that they were brothers.

The boys sat together for more than an hour, looking at scrapbooks and framed photographs and certificates. Each page that turned seemed to lighten Blaines mood as he told Kurt who the people were and stories about them all. Plus, Kurt got to see Blaine growing up – from the baby on a bear skin rug through cub scouts, fishing trips, formal celebrations, parties. He wore costumes and very proper private school uniforms, was photographed with dogs and a variety of horses, then with relatives: mostly grandparents, parents, and his brother.

By the end of the last scrapbook, Blaine was actually smiling. He glanced up at the clock and realized it was way past lunchtime.

“We can go get some lunch and then the upstairs for this afternoon? Or have you had enough of my history?” Blaine asked.

“Lets eat and come back. I am loving this house and more than that, I love that you are telling me the stories of your life, Bee.” Blaine smiled a very warm, sweet, and adoring smile at this boy he loved so much.

They went back to the carriage house to find Susan and Cooper sitting at the kitchen table eating soup.

“Hey, Squirt – is everything okay with you?” Cooper asked.

“Sure, why?”

“I thought I heard noise from the big house and when I started over there to check, I heard you playing your song on your piano. You havent played the piano for over a year. I was just....wondering,” Coop said, his eyes sad.

“I just wanted to walk through it. I was showing Kurt my piano and when I sat down, my fingers were playing before I gave it a thought. Thats okay, isnt it?” Blaine asked, looking worried.

“Of course. Just remember to lock up when youre done. Suzi and I have to get back to the office – do you guys want some soup? Its Minestrone, Suzis mother made it,” Coop asked, setting his dishes in the sink.

“Sure, you two go ahead, well eat lunch and then clean up,” Blaine offered.

“Thanks, Bee,” Cooper said, going over and hugging his little brother tightly – holding him for a long time. “Youd tell me if youre having problems, wouldnt you?” the doctor whispered into his brothers ear.

“Yeah, Coop. I promise. I was just....missing them. You know?”

“Yeah, Bee. I do. I love you, Squirt,” he said softly, then hugged his brother again and left with Susan.

*

After lunch, Blaine and Kurt went back to the house, climbing up the grand staircase. It was just off the foyer as you came in the front door. The curved, winding staircase reminded Kurt of the one at Dalton, except this one was dark walnut instead of gilded white marble.

At the top of the stairs, Blaine took him into the first room. It was almost bare, just a few framed Ansel Adams prints still graced the walls.

“Let me guess, Coopers room?” Kurt asked.

“Yeah, how did you know?”

“Well, Doctor Watson, everything is gone – furniture, books from the built-ins, lamps, plus you didnt have that look on your face like you did when you showed me the photo albums. That sort of fond nostalgia look. So, it was a lucky guess. Besides, Cooper has two Ansel Adams prints in his office,” Kurt said, looking proud of his intuitive skills.

“Well, no shit, Sherlock,” Blaine giggled. He didnt say anything else, just took Kurts hand and went to the next room. It was all done in pink, a twin bed with a ruffled bedspread, all the furniture painted white, ballerina prints on the walls. Blaine looked very uncomfortable.

“Ah...Bee? Can I ask you a question?”

“You want to know if I have...or had....a sister?” he guessed.

“Yeah,” Kurt braced himself for a bombshell. Blaine had never mentioned a sister, but what if she was on the plane, too? Or had succumbed to a childhood illness or a car accident? He held his breath until he had studied Blaines face. No sign of hidden sadness.

“No, it was our nannys room. When Cooper was little, Mom was home with him but when I came along she was a busy obstetrician. Coop was eleven, not old enough to be on his own and I was a newborn. Mom and Dad hired Violet to be our nanny. She was with us until I was twelve,” he explained. Kurt let out a sigh of relief.

“Oh, she must be the young woman in some of the pictures?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow...this looks a bit...childish? For a grown woman. Oh, I guess that doesnt say anything – Rachel Berrys bubblegum pink and buttercup yellow bedroom looks like where Strawberry Shortcake and Holly Hobby go to hook up...” Kurt mumbled, but Blaine caught it and laughed.

“Worse than this?”

“Oh, yes....definitely. You cannot imagine.”

“Mom had said for years that she was going to redecorate and turn this into an office for Cooper, but she never got around to it.”

He took Kurts hand and they went to the next room.

One step in and Kurt grinned. He knew this had to be Blaines room. Blaine saw his grin and blushed.

“So obvious. Huh? What gave it away?” Blaine asked.

“Well, I can see there are twin bunk beds. You, being the younger brother, probably got these when Cooper got a new bed? Yeah. The colors are you...teal and navy? You have three teal shirts and numerous pairs of similar trousers. I have seen your teal and navy and coral rug on the floor of your room at the carriage house. Plus, these are all prints of polo matches from...turn of the century? Let me guess, they used to be in your fathers office and you asked for them when he redecorated?” Kurt took a breath. Blaine gave him an encouraging nod of his head.

“Going on, I know you prefer to keep your books in these lawyers bookcases with the glass fronts, there is a guitar stand in the corner, and I bet a stack of risqué magazines under the edge of your mattress,” Kurt finished, walking over to pull up the side of the bedcovers and pulled out three or four magazines from between the mattress and box springs. He grinned and turned to look at Blaine.

Blaine blushed all the way to his ears. He was frozen in embarrassment for a moment as Kurt paged through the one on top, gasping at the centerfold.

“Blaine? This is....a...?”

Blaine grabbed them from Kurt, turning around to run from the room – but Kurt grabbed his shirt.

“Hey, I didnt mean to judge, Bee. Im sorry. I should never have snooped in your private stuff. Forgive me?” he asked, tears threatening at his mistake as he wished he hadnt done that.

Blaine still looked panicked but stopped, dropping the magazines on the bed. The top one fell open to the centerfold where the photo of a boy with shackles, handcuffs, a blindfold, and gag was lying spread-eagle on a bed. A well-built man with a leather harness showing all of his best assets stood over the younger one, a dragons tongue whip in his hand. Kurt looked from the magazine to Blaine, blushing even deeper red than Blaine was.

“I..I..I..can ex-ex-explain,” Blaine stuttered, taking Kurts hand and guiding him to the window seat on the other side of the room, far away from the offending magazine with its naked leather-clad men.

“Blaine, you do not owe me an explanation at all,” Kurt rushed to say. “I broke a trust with you by pulling those out of their hiding place, and all I can do is ask forgiveness. I promise, I will never again speak about those...” words failed Kurt. He looked away, trying to get his composure back.

“I want to tell you, if you think you can stand to listen?” Blaine begged, his eyes pools of liquid shame and regret.

“Of course Ill listen. Tell me, baby,” he coaxed. Blaine brought him in closer, Kurts back to Blaines chest as he slipped his arms around his boyfriends torso.

“I was only seven or eight when I began to understand that I wasnt like Cooper or any of my friends. I liked boys – I liked playing games with them, talking to them, and thinking about them all the time. When I told my best friend about it – I was ten by then – he told me I was sick like his cousin and I was going to grow up to be a bad person. A dirty queer. He said I better not tell my parents or I would go to hell.”

Kurt turned in Blaines arms, a look of shock and worry on his face. “Oh, Bee...thats horrible. Did you talk with anyone else?”

“No. I was so ashamed. But then I heard things...at school, at the park, from friends siblings. You know...things about some boys being gay. I wanted to know more, but I didnt dare look it up on my computer at home, my parents would have found out. Finally I heard a pal of mine say to someone else that his brother was gay. I went over to their house when I knew only Logan, the big brother, would be there alone. He didnt want to talk to me at first -I was ten and he was seventeen. He almost shut the door in my face, but I just point blank asked him if he was gay.

“Well, he took me up to his room and said that he was. He explained that it was not a bad thing, just different and I should be careful, but not ashamed,” Blaine told Kurt. Kurt held his hand, waiting patiently for him to go on.

“Well, I found a real friend in Logan. We didnt hang out much, we never kissed or anything like that - but if I was feeling down about myself, I could call him and hed give me a pep talk. I finally asked him – this was a year or two later – for the specifics of how gay men had sex. He wasnt comfortable telling me himself, but he got me a box of magazines. He brought them over when my folks were gone and I hid them. Those are some of them...there are more under the floorboards in the closet.”

Kurt sat there, digesting what Blaine had just told him.

“Are you...ah...if those are the ones under the mattress...ah....” Kurt babbled, not quite sure how to phrase what he wanted to know. He got up and turned to face Blaine. “Do you want to talk...ah...about those?”

Blaines face got red again.

“No, Beau. I didnt have anything else to tell me how to do ...ah..things? So I read those. I knew right away I didnt want to be tied up or hit or anything. But...well, they had muscles and the younger boy is kinda hot...” Blaine admitted, looking at Kurt for understanding.

Kurt put his arms around Blaine. “You dont have to say anything else, I understand. But I do have a question.”

“Yes?”

“When did you learn how to do it...ah...umm...not with whips and things?”

“When my dad bought me my own laptop to do school work. The internet is full of amazing facts, you know,” he grinned.

“I think we need to come back one day this week and pull up the floor boards in your closet. We might find something else interesting,” Kurt teased. He got up and put the magazines back under the mattress.

“Hey, Beau, how did you know to look under the mattress for those?” Blaine asked, but Kurt just walked out of the bedroom, and down the hall to the next room.

“Thats where I used to hide my Vogue and Marie Claire magazines before I came out to my dad,” he said.

They explored the rest of the house – the den, Bees mothers office, a few other rooms until they reached the double doors at the end of the hall.

“Kurt...wait. Dont open those doors,” Blaine said so softly that Kurt had to ask him to repeat himself.

“Oh, this must be your parents bedroom, right?”

“Yeah. I dont think I can go in there. Not right now. Im done for the day, baby. Can we go? Maybe back to the stable and check on Misty?” Blaine suggested.

“Sure, Bee. Not a problem. You might want to go in their room with Cooper or by yourself, it wont hurt my feelings, okay? Just wait until you feel strong enough. Did this help you at all today?” Kurt asked softly, pulling Blaine close and kissing his neck. Blaine couldnt help smiling at Kurts concern for him.

“Yes, it did. Much more than I thought it would. Thank you, Beau. For thinking of it and for holding on to me through it. You are the best,” Blaine said, walking down the grand staircase. They left through the kitchen door, Blaine stopping to make sure it was locked.

“Race you to the car?” he asked Kurt, not wanting to walk all the way to the stables.

“Its on!” Kurt shouted, making a good attempt at running. Blaine grabbed his hand and they ran to the car.