It had been three weeks since Blaine and Kurt had been thrown onto the tiny atoll in the vast Caribbean Sea. Kurts head didnt hurt very much any more, but he was still unable to see anything. Not even sunlight. He kept the bandage over his eyes on the hottest days, the sun beating down on the sand made his headache come back.

They had found water and food, but not once had either of them heard the motor of a plane, helicopter, ship, or anything. Kurt was getting worried and his temper was on edge because he knew deep down that it was not Blaines fault, but he needed to direct his anger at someone and Blaine was the only one here.

“Whats for dinner?” Kurt asked, although he already knew the answer.

“I got a bunch of clams and was able to catch a fish, there are coconuts and sea grapes and...oh, I found some pineapples again!” Blaine said, happy he had provided food once again. He smiled over at Kurt for a moment, but lost the smile when he remembered that Kurt couldnt see it. Kurts face was in a deep frown once again and he was in a dark mood. The past few days had found Kurt grumpy, sullen, or just depressed and Blaine was beginning to worry about him.

“Okay. I think Ill go to sleep for a while. Can you wake me up when its time to eat? Unless you can think of something for me to help with?” Kurt said, cutting his words sharply as if this was all Blaines fault. When Kurt didnt get an answer, he sighed and turned to stir the fire. Blaines concern about Kurt was deepening day by day, but he wasnt sure what to do about it. Kurt was obviously troubled by something he wasnt telling Blaine about, no matter how often the doctor asked. Some days Kurt would practically flirt with Blaine – and Blaine was torn about how to reciprocate. If Kurt had been older it would never have been a problem. Blaine really liked Kurt and would love to have a more personal, romantic relationship but Kurt was sixteen and that scared him.

Kurt would have stomped off, but he was walking barefoot on sand, which made stomping practically impossible. Sitting down near the blanket, he felt around the ground for the soft padding that Blaine had placed under the blanket. He lay down on this and pulled the lighter blanket over himself and closed his eyes. He was stiff and uncomfortable and not very sleepy, but sitting out there knowing he was on display – and not knowing if Blaine was watching him or not – was just too much today.

Blaine was sitting near the shelter and could hear Kurt sighing and tossing in the blanket. He honestly didnt know what to do. Asking Kurt what was wrong most often resulted in a growl and then silence. Blaine went about cooking the meal, setting the cleaned fish in some leaves and wrapping them to set near the coals to cook. It would take about an hour and by that time the fire would be down to a few coals, so he decided to take a nap.

Climbing onto the pallet hed made, he lay down next to Kurt. It was only a few minutes before sleep practically took him, but just as he was losing consciousness, he felt Kurt roll towards him. Kurts arm slipped around his waist as it did most nights and once more Blaine was unsure if Kurt was actually awake or asleep or somewhere in between.

It didnt matter too much, Blaine liked it when they snuggled close to each other at night. Even though he was the elder, the adult on the island, he was a little apprehensive when it came to sleeping in a deserted place like this. He probably garnered as much reassurance from the closeness as Kurt did. After a month with no contact, he began to wonder if they would ever be found. At least they had food, water, shelter, and each other. Things could be worse. He could be stuck here with a girl. Blaine smiled to himself at that – he had only just admitted to himself that he liked Kurt a lot more than he should, but he didnt know what to do about it. He didnt want to cause the boy any more anxiety.

Rolling over, Kurt put his other arm on Blaine and scooted closer. He was a real cuddler and Blaine couldnt complain about that. Most of the time it was too dark to see Kurts face, but it was noon and Blaine took advantage of that and really looked at Kurt. He was strikingly beautiful. With clear, ivory skin and a beautiful rosy blush Kurts complexion was something that would make a person stop and stare. Coupled with his chestnut hair and blue/gray/green eyes with those sparkles of gold like sunshine on the ocean, Kurt was a dream to behold. Add his witty, intelligent, kind personality and there was the perfect boyfriend. Blaine had been having these thoughts since he saw Kurt the first time in the hospital on the day he held him close until the panic attack had subsided. After a month of being alone with Kurt, Blaine was thinking more and more of asking the boy if he was at all attracted to him.

Moving back a little to get some air, Blaine was about a foot away from Kurt when he saw the boy was waking up. Kurt stretched his arms and arched his back, bringing thoughts and visions to Blaine that made his own anatomy do a bit of waking up on its own. He didnt say anything, not wanting to startle Kurt and was rewarded by seeing him rub his hand across the front of his jeans. The bulge there was growing a bit and Kurt said something to himself about how he wondered if he could stop dreaming about Blaine and waking up so hard, making the older man blush crimson red. Blaine made a decision to keep as quiet as possible so Kurt didnt know he was there – he didnt want to embarrass the kid.

Kurt felt around for the water bottle he always left beside him during naps. Finding it, he drank about half the bottle and wiped his mouth. Then he poured a little of the water in his hand and splashed it on his face, sighing dramatically and returning to the pallet of blankets and laid back down, closing his eyes. It was only a few moments before he was back asleep.

Blaine got up, walked over to the fire to make sure the fish wasnt burning and pulled it farther from the coals. He got a drink of his own and decided to go back to bed. Staying away from Kurt was starting to be too hard.

Blaine found himself watching Kurt, following him, brushing close enough to touch him all day now. Was it just that they were the only two there, or was it more than that? Blaine didnt know, but he did remember that hed found Kurt attractive that first meeting. He had known then it was inappropriate for him to pursue Kurt – but now? That was the question that occupied his mind most days now. He sighed and sat down in the shelter.

Kurt seemed disturbed in his sleep, tossing back and forth as he did often. Usually Blaine could rest a warm hand on his shoulder or back and Kurt would settle back to restful sleep, but that wasnt working today. Blaine scooted closer and put his arm back around the boy. Even this gesture didnt work and Kurt was getting more and more agitated as time went by.

“Hey, Kurt. Are you okay?” he whispered, wanting to comfort him but not overstep.

Kurts back was to Blaine and the young doctor could feel his arm getting damp where Kurts head was leaning on it. The boy was trembling, as if he were holding back something.

“Kurt?” he asked again and Kurt turned towards him, obviously crying now. “Hey, now...whats brought this on?”

“Im just feeling....I guess a little sad. Dont worry, Blaine, itll pass. Im sorry I woke you up. Is it morning?” Kurt asked.

“No, only mid-afternoon. We havent even had supper yet. Whats troubling you?”

“I dont....ah....well, it isnt....oh, shit,” Kurt said, then covered his mouth with his hand, getting sand in it and subsequently spitting it out and trying to wipe it with his shirt.

Blaine had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.

“I dont want to talk about it – its not like it matters anyway. I will probably be marooned on this god-forsaken island until my skin is burnt and wrinkled and no man will ever want to look at me again. Then Ill go home to find everyone has finished school and has wonderful careers and loving spouses and I will be lucky if I can sit alone on the corner and sell pencils out of a cup with a sign that says: blind man, please take pity on me.” Kurts angry shouting suddenly stopped and threw himself back down on the blanket, sobbing until his shoulders shook and his body trembled.

Blaine blinked back tears, his heart cramping like an angry fist in his chest as he tried to think of some way to calm Kurt down. There was probably nothing he could have done to prevent it: Kurt was in full panic attack. He trembled as he tried to draw in a full lung of air, but his seizing muscles prevented it and the fear spread across his face. Blaine had him in his arms in a split second, speaking calmly and trying to get Kurt to breathe.

“Kurt, youre okay. Its just a panic attack. Remember youve had them before and all you have to do is think of a calm, safe place and go there in your head,” Blaine coaxed the boy, holding him firmly but gently and stroking his temple and cheek with slow and tender touches of his fingertips. “You are safe here with me, beautiful, I wont let anything harm you. Kurt, close your eyes and try to imagine taking a slow, deep breath. Its okay if you arent there yet, all Im asking you to do is imagine it. Know that you are safe, that no one can harm you here, that I am holding you safe in my arms now and I wont leave you, baby, I wont let go as long as you need me Ill be here...” Blaine went on whispering promises of safety and calmness into Kurts ear, stroking his cheek and down to his arm until finally he felt rather than heard Kurt take one deep breath and his muscles began to relax.

“Keep doing that, Kurt, listen to your body and let each muscle go limp from your head to your toes. Im going to lay you down on the blanket now,” Blaine started to say, which made Kurt begin to stiffen again.

“Im not leaving you, sweet boy. I will stay right here until you tell me to go. Let me know when you need a drink of water, its right here,” Blaine said, a little surprised at Kurts returned panic when he thought Blaine might be moving farther away. Kurt was more dependent upon him than Blaine had supposed. He continued to stroke Kurts forehead, moving the silky chestnut hair out of his eyes.

After a long time Kurt was better: his heart beat at a steady pace, his breaths no longer painful to listen to as he lay beside Blaine. His hand was still holding on to Blaine. Now the crescent-shaped cuts that were the result of Kurts vise-like grip on Blaines hands were stinging. The doctor hadnt even realized how tightly Kurt had held on.

“Kurt? Do you want to talk about what just happened?” Blaine asked, very concerned about the trigger that caused this so many times in the past month.

“Im not sure exactly. I was having this dream....my dad was dead, died of a broken heart when they never found us. Then one day we were rescued and I ended up back in Ohio, standing on a street corner in threadbare clothes in the snow. My hair was so dirty that it smelled and nobody would come close enough to put a few coins in the cup to buy a pencil. All I wanted was something to eat or a warm coat....it was so bad, and it seemed real,” Kurt lamented.

“Real?”

“Yeah, you know when you dream sometimes you know its a dream, you act bolder or you take crazy risks because you know its a dream? Well, this was the other kind – when you think its your life and nothing about it seems like a dream. And there I was, blind and alone. No family, no scholarship, nothing,” Kurt said, still lying down and still holding Blaines hand tightly. Blaine reached over and stroked down Kurts arm, but he jumped and Blaine pulled his hand back and didnt try to do that again.

“Scholarship?” he asked, confused.

Kurts face was suddenly flushed scarlet with blood racing to the surface with his embarrassment.

“Oh, yeah...that. Nevermind. It doesnt matter now anyway. Im too late and...well, these circumstances....” Kurt said, once again biting the inside of his cheek to keep his tears from running down his face.

“You had a scholarship? Where?” Blaine asked again. Kurt could tell Blaine wasnt going to let this go and the more he thought about it, the worse he felt. He wondered what his face looked like now – dry skin, chapped and peeling maybe with blotches of red and swollen from crying. He was suddenly glad he was blind, he wouldnt want to see what hed become.

“Ah, it was a full scholarship for all four years, including room and board,” Kurt said, not caring any more that he was crying once again in front of this man. Blaine had seen him cry before, so what did it matter?

“Wow. I mean, I knew you were intelligent and everything, but that kind of scholarship doesnt happen every day. What college?” Blaine asked. Kurt rolled his eyes and sighed.

“It doesnt matter now. Even if we are found and get back to our lives, theyll take the offer back. I cant accept it now,” Kurt said, moving his hand to indicate his eyes.

“Oh, no...Kurt, that wont matter! I think all universities and colleges have special accommodations for visually impaired students. You might need to take some instructive classes on how to do things like read Braille, things like that, but it shouldnt impair your academic career,” Blaine tried to cheer Kurt, but the boy was back to sobbing and against his better judgment Blaine gave in to his instincts and wrapped his arms tightly around Kurt. He hummed softly and kissed the boys hair, saying encouraging things into his ear.

“You dont understand, Blaine.....the scholarship was to Parsons,” Kurt sobbed into Blaines shoulder where he had taken refuge, his arms wrapped around Blaines waist as he leaned heavily on the man.

“Oh, theyre pretty well known – wow, such a prestigious place, and you got a four year scholarship? Congratulations!” Blaine blurted out, very impressed.

“No, you dont understand. Do you know what they teach at Parsons New School for Design?” Kurt asked, his face a picture of misery.

“No,” Blaine admitted.

“They have visual arts programs. Visual. Architecture, Fashion, Decorative Arts, Lighting Design, Illustration, Photography. Do you notice a theme here, Doctor? Well, do you?” Kurt snapped at Blaine, taking his bad mood out on the only person he could. Kurt continued before Blaine could take breath to speak.

“They all require eyesight,” Kurt managed to say before dissolving into his self-pitying cry.

“Oh, Kurt. I know a specialist. Hes an ophthalmologist and a crackerjack surgeon. I will take you there as soon as we get back to civilization. Not if, but WHEN, and I know it will be soon.” Blaine pulled Kurt into a warmer hug, patting his back and then rubbing his shoulders.

“That might work,” Kurt replied without enthusiasm, “but what if it doesnt? Ill just end up an old bachelor with dozens of cats and nobody to love me,” Kurt whined. He knew he was exaggerating, but at that moment it all seemed hopeless. He heaved a huge melancholy sigh and tried to lie back down. Blaine was having none of it.

“Kurt, youre wrong. You are an amazing man, so intelligent and kind and delicious to look at,” Blaine started, only to be interrupted by Kurt.

“ Delicious? How can someone be delicious to look at? That doesnt even make sense. Blaine, its nice of you to try and cheer me up with this...ah...pep talk, but to tell the truth I think Im relieved that Im blind so I cant see how bad I look any more. Im so sorry you have to look at me every day. Maybe you should be the one wearing this bandage over your eyes,” Kurt scoffed. Blaine was still insisting Kurt wear the bandage so he didnt accidentally look into the sun and damage his eyes permanently.

“Oh, Kurt. If you only knew what the sight of you does to me,” Blaine said quietly. It wasnt until Kurt whipped his head around that Blaine realized hed said that loud enough for Kurt to hear. He had to think of some sort of damage control, but nothing was presenting itself.

“What? What did you mean by that, Anderson?” Kurt asked, his hand now on Blaines arm, his fingers around the older mans forearm and gripping tightly.

Blaine sat quietly, just a bit stunned, while Kurt tried to find Blaine with his hand – fingers cupped as if he were already holding Blaines face. Before he could give it much scrutiny, Blaine did something absolutely spontaneous. He leaned forward and put his lips on Kurts. There was a loud gasp for air, then Blaine was the one gasping because Kurt knocked him backwards from the log where they were sitting in the shelter. Blaine was on his back in the sand, trying to catch his breath while Kurt pressed his lips to Blaines mouth. He was kissing the surprised doctor with all the pent-up frustration, angst, and passion that had been building in him since the day his father collapsed in St John. It didnt take Blaine long to regroup and return the kiss – his brain not functioning on the level required for making moral decisions. He was only returning the passion hed been stuffing down inside himself for almost a year, since the whole clusterfuck hed made of his life back in New York.

They gripped each other tightly, rolling in the sand but not letting their mouths part. Both of them breathing heavily through their noses, tugging and pulling to get closer as Blaine was rolled on his back once again and Kurt pressed his whole body into the muscular one he had dreamed about for the past month. Blaine reached his hands under the tattered remains of Kurts shirt and pressed his fingers into the soft flesh he found there, using the leverage to thrust his pelvis closer, harder into Kurts and feeling the hard erection that mirrored his own.

Kurt pulled back just enough to get a big lungful of air and Blaine took advantage and thrust his tongue into Kurts mouth, massaging and tasting the boy that had occupied most of his waking and sleeping thoughts for weeks.

It wasnt until Blaine realized that Kurt was making small whining, moaning sounds that he knew the boy was on the verge of a climax. Panicked, he pushed the boy off of him, harder than he had meant to and rushing to his feet. Blaine ran. He ran as fast as he could straight into the jungle, heedless of the branches and vegetation that blocked his way; tripping and fumbling back to his feet to run and run and run.....

“Blaine? Blaine!! Where are you? What was that...what did I do wrong? Im sorry, Blaine, Ill never do it again, just come back! Dont leave me alone, Blaine....” Kurt shouted at first, ending in a small whimper as he came to the realization that Blaine was nowhere to be found. He had heard the man crashing through the trees to get away. He had apparently found Kurt to be so repulsive that hed had to run to get away from him.....leaving him alone on the sandy ground by the shelter. Alone. Where Kurt deserved to be. Why had he been so stupid? Why couldnt he control himself? Going over the events in his mind, Kurt wasnt even clear what had happened. They had been talking about his scholarship, what he had lost and then suddenly Blaine was kissing him and...? Kurt had made a grave mistake and now it looked like he would have to pay for that.

Kurt gathered up the few things he could manage: part of the cooked fish, a split coconut, some clothes, a container of water, and a fishing line and hooks, Kurt made a pack out of the thinner of the blankets and sat still for a moment, trying to figure out which way was the jungle and which the ocean. Sitting very still he felt the wind coming from his left and it smelled like salt water. Okay, then he had heard Blaine run to his right, into the thickest part of the jungle. To the back of where he was standing was the way to the rocks and the cliff where hed found the spring water on that day when they had first been there, so he carefully turned all the way around and started walking. He thought briefly about going back to try and locate his shoes, but he was afraid Blaine would return, so he left without them.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Blaine finally ran out of energy, stopping in the middle of a clearing with his hands on his knees and leaning over to catch his breath. He stood there longer than necessary trying to figure out what to do next and spotted a fallen palm tree. He sat down on it, head in hands, his mind a mess of conflicting emotions.

What had happened? One minute hed been trying to calm Kurt down after a panic attack, talking about his scholarship to design school – and the next minute they were rolling in the sand, kissing and rutting against each other like horny rabbits. Blaines face blushed deep red with shame. Why couldnt he control himself?

It was true that hed been having dreams about Kurt. After all, Kurts intelligence and wit, his caring for his father and how brave he was in the face of adversity was astounding. Add to that he was beautiful to look at with his ivory skin and haunting eyes and he was just the perfect man of Blaines dreams. The only conflict was his age. He was sixteen and although that was past the age of consent in both Ohio and New York, Blaine didnt know if it was fair to burden such a young person with the mountains of baggage that hed been carrying within himself for far too long.

His mind went back to the hospital where hed been working in the pediatric cancer ward. All along he believed he was strong enough to be there for his patients, their parents, the staff. He had done fine for quite a while until he met Brooklyn. She was a tiny blue-eyed nine year old package of dynamite that had fallen in love with him at first site. The feeling was mutual. Unfortunately, Brooke had a particularly virulent form of leukemia and her prospects werent good from the beginning. She was on her third round of chemo by the time she met Dr. Anderson and he could tell that her parents had given up hope. He was determined not to and went after her cancer with a vengeance. She died anyway and now Blaine blinked his eyes, wishing he could bring forth just one tear to mourn the little girl, but it didnt happen. He could cry for all the others, but thinking about Brooke and the fact that she was braver than any other person he had ever met just made tears impossible.

Hed left NY Metro after that, and Wes had asked him to come down to St Thomas where they were short of trauma surgeons. Blaine filled in at the ER for a few weeks, trying to decide what to do when he met Kurt in the cubicle where Burt Hummel was being treated. It was funny, Blaine had the same instant love for Kurt that hed had when he met Brooklyn, and it scared him just as much. Then hed been afraid when he realized the man that saved him from the ocean was Kurt, but managed to put it out of his mind for the weeks they had been stranded – well, for most of the time anyway. He tried to think of Kurt as a patient, as someone he could treat and release and not think much about after they parted, but with every day that went by Blaine felt himself growing closer and more in love with Kurt. He had kissed him first and Kurts reaction was to throw himself upon Blaine and kiss him within an inch of his life. It was....well, Blaine had no idea what it was. Maybe he dreamed it.

After sitting in the jungle for over an hour, Blaine got up, dusted himself off, and started the long walk back to the shelter to apologize to Kurt and see how he could clean up this mess he was making of his life.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~