Who Will Love Me Now

Blaine picked his head up off Kurt's chest where he had rested it while telling Kurt the rest of the story about what had happened to him and looked Kurt in the face. Kurt's breathing seemed shaky and his eyes were red and glassy. Blaine was going to ask him if he was okay but he knew that Kurt wasn't that he was really upset. "Kurt..." Blaine squeaked out his name as Kurt rolled him onto his back and hovered above him. Blaine didn't know how to read the expression on his face, he looked so upset though.

Kurt didn't know why he had suddenly flipped Blaine over onto his back and lowered himself down over him. Maybe he wanted to protect Blaine, his brain sort of told his body to do it before he really realized what he was doing. "He fucking videotaped it..." Kurt was having a hard time controlling his breathing, it was like he had been running for hours, his lungs were in pain. He wondered if he was having some sort of panic attack. He lowered his face and buried it in Blaine's neck trying to get his breathing to calm down. Why would they have videotaped it?

Blaine ran his hand down the side of Kurt's face that wasn't nuzzling against his neck. He could feel Kurt's breathing growing calmer. "I don't know which one of them videoed it, I don't remember seeing a camera of any kind..." Blaine admitted.

"Maybe it was a phone..." Kurt knew that one of them could have had their phone out and Blaine wouldn't have automatically thought they were taping it happening.

"Maybe..." Blaine pressed his cheek against Kurt's as he nuzzled into his neck again.

Kurt picked his head up after he had run through in his head what Blaine had told him again, only certain things were jumping out at him right now. "I need to see..." Kurt blurted out.

"See what?" Blaine wasn't sure what he meant; they had just been talking about the video so he wondered if Kurt meant that or something else.

Kurt lifted his body slightly and lay off to the side of Blaine's hips. He ran a hand down Blaine's stomach and let it come to rest on his left hip. Blaine fidgeted under his touch but didn't try to push him away. "It scarred didn't it?" He ran his thumb over the material of Blaine's pants. Blaine just nodded at him. "Can I see?" Kurt asked and just received another nod and watched Blaine close his eyes. Kurt slid Blaine's shirt up slightly and let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding. Blaine had an amazing body and Kurt loved looking. Was ogling your boyfriend's body wrong? Kurt thought to himself and had to smirk. He didn't care if it was wrong, he was going to do it as long as Blaine didn't object too it. He ran his finger down the line of Blaine's lower torso that created a ‘v' which disappeared below the waist band of his pants. Kurt absolutely loved Blaine's waist and hips.

Blaine shivered at his touch but kept his eyes closed; Kurt's hands were so soft. Kurt slid his fingers under the edge of Blaine's pants and slowly pulled them down to reveal his hips. Blaine felt his body shiver as Kurt ghosted his fingers over his skin. He wasn't going to say anything until Kurt did. He was just glad that Kurt was talking about the scar and not the video, although showing the scar was something he was nervous about.

Kurt positioned Blaine's pants to make sure they didn't show off more than what Blaine was ready for him to see. If Kurt was being honest with himself he really wouldn't mind seeing Blaine naked right now, but knew it wasn't the right time. He looked over Blaine's lower stomach and was glad he didn't see any scars, but when he got to Blaine's left hip he felt his breath hitch. The scar was lighter in color than Blaine's skin tone so it was easily noticeable. He ran his finger over it lightly; he didn't like seeing his beautiful boyfriend scarred. Kurt didn't know what to say about the scar, he didn't know how Blaine felt about it, he hadn't said much on the matter. He had to figure out how to find that video, it wasn't that Kurt wanted to see it happening to Blaine but he needed to know who did what. He needed to know who left this scar that marred Blaine's beautiful skin. Kurt leaned down and pressed his lips over the scar, Blaine's skin was so soft.

Blaine let out a moan and snapped his head up so he could look down at Kurt. Kurt was looking up at him through his eyelashes. His eyes were still that beautiful blue-green. "That tickles..." Blaine murmured. He hadn't realized his hips were ticklish but as Kurt pressed another kiss to his skin he was sure that was one of his ticklish spots.

"Does it, now?" Kurt smirked up at Blaine, making a mental note to always remember that. Blaine nodded at him and Kurt couldn't help but placed another kiss to his hip. He felt Blaine squirm under him and he pulled away. He slipped up the bed so he was lying beside Blaine again.

"That scar is ugly..." Blaine mumbled. He always tried not to look at it whenever he was showering but it always caught his eye and he always hated seeing it. Kurt didn't say anything in response so Blaine turned his head to look at him. Blaine let out a sigh it was clear on Kurt's face that he didn't know what to say. "You think it is right?"

Kurt snapped his eyes so they locked onto Blaine's. "I don't like thinking you are scarred from that because it will always be a reminder of what happened that night...but Baby it doesn't make you ugly, if that's what you are thinking." Kurt ran his finger over the scar.

Blaine squirmed at Kurt's touch, he was very ticklish there. He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and just nodded at Kurt. It was a reminder of that night and that is why Blaine tried hard not to pay attention to the scar. They fell into silence again. Blaine was actually surprise Kurt hadn't started questioning him right away about what he had already told him. He wondered if Kurt was still wrapping his head around it all, he seemed really troubled he had crease lines in his forehead. Blaine reached up and ran his fingers across Kurt's forehead and watched a small smile pull at Kurt's soft pink lips. "You can ask me things if that's what you want to do."

Kurt nodded. He did want to ask Blaine things, there were so many things running through his mind right now that he didn't know where he wanted to start. "I can't believe he just..." Kurt stopped mid-sentence he didn't really want to say what he was going to say. He took a deep breath, before he spoke again, "I can't believe that he just forced himself on you...no preparation or anything..." This was one of the parts that was bothering Kurt the most. He couldn't imagine someone just forcing themselves into someone without lube or anything. His body gave an involuntary shudder. He couldn't imagine the pain Blaine must have been in.

Blaine was chewing on his bottom lip, he felt his body shudder too when Kurt mentioned it. "I looked things up after...it happened...I wanted to know things..." Blaine felt himself blush at admitting he looked that kind of thing up. "I wanted to know what it was really supposed to be like..."

"Baby, you don't need to blush..." Kurt rubbed his thumb down Blaine's cheek. "It wasn't supposed to be like that..." Kurt felt the growl slip into his voice again. Kurt physically hurt thinking about Blaine being in that much pain with something that was supposed to be something great to share with the one you loved. Kurt fell silent again he really didn't know how to ask the questions he really wanted to ask. He closed his eyes and let out a long sigh. He thought going straight to the questions would be the easiest, no use trying to skirt around the hard questions. "Did he use a condom?"

Blaine shook his head. "No he didn't...but I was tested and I didn't get anything..." Blaine was at least thankful for that. "They even gave me antibiotics because when I showed them the bite, the doctor said that human bites can get infected easily."

"So your aunt did take you to the doctors then?" Kurt wasn't sure if she had, with what Blaine had said about his dad. Kurt felt his anger boil when the thought of Blaine's dad came back into his mind. He took a deep breath and watched Blaine.

"Yes the next day after my dad left for work." Blaine opened his eyes and watched Kurt. "My dad told her that I could get checked out and the test done but I wasn't to tell people I was raped, that I had to tell them that I let myself get fucked and was careless..." Blaine shook his head. "Of course I didn't say that...my aunt just said that I had a bad experience and that she wanted the tests done on me..."

Kurt couldn't believe that no one reported that Blaine was raped, when they knew who did it or maybe Blaine didn't tell them who did it, if he didn't tell then they couldn't really do anything...but his aunt seemed to know it was Blaine's roommate...but maybe she doesn't know who that was... "Baby does your aunt know it was Jeremiah and the others? Or did you just say it was your roommate...does she know Jeremiah?" Kurt wasn't sure, he needed to know.

"She just knows it was my roommate, nothing else, she doesn't know anyone else was involved. I doubt it would have mattered though, their all Dalton boys their daddies are rich..." Blaine knew his dad was rich too but his dad wouldn't stand behind him to go against these other boys, it would disgrace the family. Blaine let out a sigh this time it was out of frustration. "Aunt Lil wanted to come to Dalton to meet Jeremiah but I wouldn't let her come..." Blaine could tell Kurt didn't understand why he didn't tell who did it. "Kurt my dad wouldn't press charges against them..."

Kurt let out a huff of air. He couldn't believe a father or parent for that matter would let people get away with hurting their child like that. He knew that no matter how much he and his dad fought when he was younger that his dad would have always stood up for him and protected him. He wouldn't have let people get away with it. "I just don't understand why your dad..." Kurt shook his head.

"He hates everything about gay people, I think it's mostly because he doesn't understand...but he doesn't want to try to understand either." Blaine took Kurt's hand and laced their fingers back together. "That's why I am going to hold off telling him about you for as long as possible...I hope that's okay..."

"Baby that's fine, I don't want to give him another reason to hurt you." Kurt leaned in and placed a soft kiss to Blaine's lips. After a few minutes of kissing Kurt pulled back and smiled at his cute boyfriend, but the smile quickly left his face, with the words that came out of said boyfriend's mouth.

They fell into silence again. Kurt was lost in thought..."Oh my God, I'm so stupid..." Kurt shot out.

"What?" Blaine didn't know what Kurt was talking about.

"Our fight we had...when I said that you didn't need to act like I was going to rape you...oh my God..." Kurt covered his mouth. He felt like slapping himself multiple times really hard. Granted at the time he didn't know that's what had happened but still, that explained why Blaine had been hurt so bad by his words. "I'm so sorry baby..."

"You don't need to be sorry about that...you didn't know..." Blaine kissed that back of Kurt's hand. They fell into silence again Blaine was playing with Kurt's fingers. "So after everything I've told you, you still love me and want to be with me?"

Kurt was shocked he wasn't sure why Blaine thought that telling him what happened would mean that he wouldn't want him anymore. "Of course I still love you and want you!" Kurt kissed him again, resting his hand on the back of Blaine's head to pull him in closer, wrapping his fingers in Blaine's curls at the nape of his neck. Kurt pulled back to see tears running down Blaine's cheeks from his closed eyes. "Baby, please don't cry."

"I'm sorry..." Blaine wiped the tears away with the back of his hand.

"You don't have to be sorry. Baby, I just don't like seeing you cry..." Kurt placed a soft kiss to Blaine's forehead. "Why would you think telling me what happened would make me not want to be with you?"

Blaine let out a breathy laugh that didn't have much humor in it. "After it happened, when I was still at home, my aunt had fixed dinner for me and my dad came home. We were sitting in the dining room eating and he came in, for awhile he didn't talk to me at all, but then he just said while laughing, ‘who will ever love you after they find out you're a slut...' to say the least I was shocked but my aunt was pissed. I left the dining room and hid the rest of the time in my room. When the weekend was over I asked Wes to come pick me up because I didn't want my aunt to get near the school. Once I was back to school, Jeremiah and the others acted like I didn't exist, they barely talked to me...I mean it didn't bother me, I was glad. On the last day of school for the seniors, Jeremiah..." Blaine sighed. "He came back into the room and came over to me I was on my bed reading and he started kissing me but I pushed him away. He was easier to fight off just him alone. And he got really mad and was like, ‘no one is going to want you, no one will love you'." Blaine shook his head at the memory. "He then stormed out of the room...I tried not to believe him, but it's just one of those things I guess, I started to think that if I ever told anyone that they weren't going to like me and what not. Found myself thinking ‘who will love me now'...I guess I really believed it."

Kurt felt his resentment for these people fume again at Blaine's words. Blaine thought that no one would love him if he told them what happened to him because of what these assholes said to him. Kurt was so upset about what Blaine's dad had said, Blaine was not a slut. "Baby you didn't think it was your fault did you?" Kurt asked when the thought came to him about how Blaine's dad said he got what he deserved.

Blaine bit his bottom lip while he considered what to say. "No...I just thought that I would never be able to get close to someone again..." Blaine put his hand on Kurt's chest. "I knew that being gay didn't mean you deserved to be treated that way...I was just too scared of what my dad would do if I tried to tell people what happened and he found out about it."

Kurt nodded he could tell that Blaine was scared of his dad so he didn't blame him for not wanting people knowing but he didn't like that Jeremiah and the others were getting away with it. "I understand, just the whole thing is frustrating...I feel like I could murder Jeremiah...and I would think twice about it..." Kurt admitted.

"You can't do that because they will take you away from me and lock you up and I couldn't deal with that..." Blaine didn't want to think about being away from Kurt. It was kind of scary how dependant of Kurt he was becoming and how much he wanted to be around Kurt all the time.

Kurt smiled at him and kissed him again. "I won't leave you Blaine!" He assured him once the kiss was broken.

They spent more time talking about all the rest of the things Blaine had told Kurt but Kurt let out a sigh when he noticed the clock. It was almost nine in the morning and if they didn't go now they would miss breakfast. Which Kurt wouldn't really mind doing if he got to lay in bed with Blaine all morning but his stomach was practically yelling at him to feed it. "We should probably go get food."

Blaine stretched and let out a yawn. He too was hungry but he didn't want to run into Jeremiah. "I..." Blaine didn't get to finish his statement Kurt pressed his lips to his. Blaine moaned into the kiss. He would never get sick of kissing Kurt. When Kurt's stomach let out a loud rumbling growl Blaine laughed and Kurt backed away from him. "You should go get food. I don't really want to run into him..."

"I know you don't but you need to eat..."

"You can always just bring me back coffee and a bagel..." Blaine gave Kurt a big smile hoping he would. "Please..." Blaine was trying to be as cute as he could but he felt silly and felt the blush begin to creep into his cheeks. He had to look away from Kurt because he thought that Kurt would find it stupid.

"God you are too cute..." Kurt leaned in and kissed Blaine again. He knew that Blaine was trying to be cute but he really didn't need the extra effort because no matter what Blaine did Kurt would always find him extremely adorable. Kurt pulled away when Blaine let out another moan. He loved listening to Blaine make those noises from just kissing but he had to keep control of his hormones and if he kept listening to Blaine make those noises it was going to be very hard thing to do. Wrong word to use Kurt, don't think the word hard, it will just make you think more about it...tough that's a better word...think that... "Yes I will bring you coffee and bagel..." He placed a quick kiss to Blaine's mouth and then got up off the bed.

Blaine gave Kurt a huge smile. "Thanks..." Kurt returned the smile as he walked into the bathroom. Blaine sighed and laid back on the bed, he was a little nervous to have Kurt go out of the room by himself and hoped that Kurt wouldn't say anything to anyone. Blaine climbed off the bed and opened his wardrobe closet. He pulled out a pair of white boxer briefs, a pair of dark blue skinny jeans, a plain white v-neck t-shirt and his light blue Dalton pull-over hooded sweatshirt.

Blaine picked his head up to look at Kurt when he heard the bathroom door open. He was dressed in super skinny gray pants and a plain black v-neck t-shirt. Blaine couldn't help but noticed how the shirt showed of Kurt's muscular chest and upper arms. Kurt smiled at Blaine when he saw the close sitting beside him on the bed.

"Can I wear that?" Kurt came over and put his hand on the sweatshirt.

"You want to wear my hoodie?" Blaine couldn't help the smile that came on his face. Kurt wanted to wear his clothes.    

"Yes I do if you will let me..." Kurt smiled at Blaine again when he nodded. Kurt picked up the sweatshirt and slid it on over his head. It smelt like Blaine, Kurt was going to enjoy wearing it. "Thank-you baby..." Kurt leaned down and placed a kiss to Blaine's lips. Kurt glanced at the clock it was almost nine-thirty so he knew he had to be quick. He gave Blaine another kiss and then walked over to his nightstand and grabbed his keys and shoved his phone into his pocket. "I will be back in a few minutes..."