The ride from the airport to his apartment on the subway was crowded and noisy and Kurt just wanted to be alone.

His apartment was filled with Rachel and Finn and their laughter and the over-whelming love that they exuded and Kurt just wanted to be alone.

But he couldn’t. He hadn’t seen his step brother in forever, and he knew that both would want a full rundown of his two days at home. Kurt momentarily considered using the “I have rehearsal in the morning” excuse but it was only 8 when he got back and even he didn’t need that much sleep.

After a full report on his end, Finn and Rachel regaled him with tales of their New York City Thanksgiving and somehow that made everything worse. As perfect as Thanksgiving back in Lima had been, hearing of their adventures at the Macy’s parade, and too many people and too much food in the small apartment, of walking through Times Square at night when it was all lit up, hand-in-hand, suddenly Kurt felt as though his Thanksgiving surprise had been feeble. Finn had gotten a full New York experience, Blaine had gotten Kurt.

After a few hours of storytelling and catching up Kurt excused himself as politely as possible and headed to bed, pulling his phone out of his pocket as soon as he entered his room and dialing Blaine’s number.

“Hello?”

“You aren’t upset that you didn’t get to see the parade, right? Or Times Square?” Blaine laughed quietly on the other end.

“Of course not,” then he paused. When he spoke again his voice had a twinge of uncertainty to it, “you aren’t upset that you had to come back to Lima, right?”

“I came back to you, Blaine,” Kurt replied. “I’m just sorry I couldn’t give you the Thanksgiving I’d promised,” Kurt apologized again.

“You gave me a better one, Kurt.” Suddenly Kurt felt better.

He spent the next hour or so talking with Blaine until finally both of them needed to head to bed so they could be at rehearsal the next day. Kurt promised Blaine a New York City Christmas and Blaine promised Kurt that no matter what happened for Christmas it would be perfect because they would be together.

Rehearsal the next day was tedious. Kurt showed up an hour and a half before any of the other actors, as promised, to go over some things with his director.

Though he appreciated the extra time, and the allowance to go to Lima, he would’ve appreciated the extra sleep even more. As the day went on and the show began falling in to place Kurt looked around, expecting to find a group of people hanging out, chatting congenially as they waited for the next scene to be called. Instead he found the cast scattered across the auditorium, running over lines in pairs or alone, or talking quietly into cell phones. That’s how it always was here, and it once more made him miss the atmosphere back in Lima.

As the days carried on and Fall turned to Winter, Kurt and Blaine began planning their Christmases. Kurt would be back in Lima for Christmas Eve, Christmas, and Boxing day, and then both would head to New York until New Years. January 3rd Kurt was off with his tour. In a lot of ways being on tour was going to make his relationship with Blaine a lot easier; shows ended a lot sooner than his night shifts used to, and he had days off every now, lots of down-time to call or write, and, perhaps most importantly, it meant he would be acting again, living his dream and doing something of which Blaine could be proud. It also meant that he would be spending a week in Cleveland and Cincinnati doing shows, with days off in-between.

One night, a few weeks before Christmas, Kurt had a day off from rehearsals and Rachel decided to take advantage of that. She came up to him with another one of her New York adventures and wouldn’t let him say no. It was a dive bar, in a bohemian section of the city, with live music every night. Apparently it was all the rage with arts students (of course) and the guy performing tonight was supposedly magnificent. Kurt agreed, mostly to get Rachel to leave him alone, and went along to the bar.

The bar itself was unremarkable in every way. The outside looked like every other building on the block; the inside was barely more than an old wooden bar and some tables. But there was a tiny stage set up towards the back and even before they’d made it in the door Kurt could hear the strands of music making their way out on to the street. Whoever was playing sounded fantastic. Once they’d entered Kurt’s eyes landed on the stage and saw the singer. He was a small guy, dressed in a simple white tee and dark-wash jeans. His hair was wild, dark curls framed his face, and his eyes sparkled with joy and mischief as he continued playing. He was stunning. Kurt tore his eyes off the stage and followed Rachel to a small table, close enough to the stage to see the boy perfectly, but far enough back that they didn’t seem too interested. Kurt situated himself so that he was turned mostly away from the stage but Rachel sat facing right at the singer.

“He’s gorgeous,” she said, just loud enough to be heard over the music.

“What about Finn?” Kurt teased, intentionally avoiding any actual reply to her comment.

“Hey, just because I’m not eating doesn’t mean I can’t look at the menu!” Rachel shot back, laughing and nudging Kurt. “Come on, you know he’s adorable.” Kurt rolled his eyes and, reluctantly, returned his gaze to the stage. He scrutinized the musician, looking for anything he could use to get Rachel to leave him alone.

“He’s gay,” Kurt said turning back to Rachel. “Sorry.” Rachel pouted.

“How can you tell?! I mean, that doesn’t mean I can’t look, but still, how can you tell?” Kurt shrugged.

“I just can.”

“I bet you….$20 that he isn’t.” Kurt looked at her as though she were insane.

“You really want to challenge me on this?”

“Yup.”

“Fine,” Kurt sighed. “Make it $25.” He offered out his hand and Rachel shook it in agreement of the terms of their bet.

They sat there, chatting and joking, with Rachel watching the stage intently, waiting until there was a break in the set. After an hour and a half filled with a whole range of covers, from classics to current pop hits to some of the most random songs imaginable, he finally declared that he was taking a break.

“Now’s your chance to prove that he’s gay,” Rachel said, elbowing Kurt and nudging him out of his chair.

“What?! What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know! Just...go talk to him! Buy him a drink or something, he’s headed towards the bar.”

“Rachel, I’m 18, I can’t buy him a drink. Maybe a soda, but that’s hardly impressive.”

“Oh just shut up and go!” Kurt rolled his eyes but knew Rachel wasn’t going to stop until he went.

Kurt meandered over to the bar, trying to decide exactly what to say, stopping a few barstools down from the mystery musician. As he stood there waiting for the bartender to notice him he glanced down at the singer and noticed he was looking back. Kurt smiled shyly and lowered his gaze. After a minute he felt movement beside him.

“Hi.” It was him. And good lord he was even more attractive up close. Kurt turned towards him and opened his mouth to return the greeting, but he was dumbstruck. “I’m Kai,” he smiled and offered a hand.

“Um, uh. Kurt,” Kurt replied, shaking his hand and attempting to return the smile. This guy – Kai – his eyes were a brilliant hazel green color up close. From the stage it had been hard to see the way the colors twisted and mixed in his eyes, but face to face it was breath-taking.

“How are you liking the set?” Kai asked. His voice had a sort of musicality to it, even when he was just speaking.

“Oh, it’s really great,” Kurt said, breaking the eye contact and searching for the bartender. “You’re really talented,” he added.

“Thanks.” Kurt felt Kai shift beside him. “So, uh, does your, uh, girlfriend, uh, does she like it, too?” Kai asked. Kurt smirked.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” he laughed, “she’s dating my brother, actually.” Kai nodded, and Kurt thought he saw a small smile playing on his lips.

“Oh, okay. Um…do you, do you have a girlfriend, or…?” Kurt laughed again.

“Not exactly the girlfriend type.” Now Kurt was sure that Kai was smiling.

“Can, uh, can I buy you a drink? I have a few minutes until my next set.” Kurt smiled and accepted. They chatted while the bartended fixed Kurt his drink – his nonalcoholic drink.

Kai was a freshman at Columbia who sang and wrote music in his spare time. He, too, had moved to the city to get away from a small town with an incredibly small mind when it came to things like being gay. He loved being in New York and Kurt quickly realized that they had a scary amount in common. They laughed and chatted until Kai had to go back and perform a few more songs, but he made Kurt promise to wait for him so they could talk more after.

Kurt returned to Rachel with a smirk on his face, though he was surprised to find her smirking right back.“He’s gay,” Kurt said, sitting down and sipping at his drink.

“Oh, I could tell,” Rachel said, giving Kurt a look that he couldn’t quite read.

“You owe me $25.”

“You have a boyfriend, Kurt.” Rachel said, lowering her voice and scooting closer. “And I know he’s super cute and whatever, but don’t forget about Blaine.”

“Rachel, we were just talking. We have a lot in common.” Kurt was offended at her insinuations.

“That was not just talking. Did you tell him about Blaine?”

“No, but –“

“Kurt.”

“Rachel.”

“You have to tell him.”

“I’m going to tell him, when it comes up. I’m not just going to walk up to him and say, ‘oh, and by the way, my friend thinks you’re hitting on me so I should tell you I have a boyfriend!’ I mean, Christ, Rachel, just because two guys are gay doesn’t mean that they automatically want to have sex or something!”

“Mmhmm,” Rachel said, crossing her arms and turning her attention back towards Kai. “The lady doth protest too much, methinks,” she added under her breath.

Just as the school musical was coming to an end, rehearsals for the community theatre production of Pippin were starting up. Blaine had timed it perfectly so that he would have barely a day off to wallow in his alone-ness. It was weird, walking in to a rehearsal where he didn’t know a single other actor. It had been a while since he’d been ‘the new guy’ and even then he’d at least known Kurt, and Finn, and Rachel, and most of the glee club.

“Hi, you must be Blaine!” a good-looking guy with short, slicked back blonde hair and bright emerald green eyes stood before Blaine, hand held out in front of him.

“Hi…I’m sorry, I, I don’t know who you are?” Or, for that matter, how he knew Blaine’s name.

“Oh, sorry, I’m James, I’m the assistant director for the show.”

“Oh! Oh, hi. I’m so sorry, I didn’t see you at auditions or anything,” Blaine racked his brain, trying to remember seeing this boy anywhere before.

“Yeah, I know, I missed a day of auditions for, uh, personal reasons,” James replied, scratching the back of his neck nervously. It was clearly not a subject that he enjoyed discussing. “Anyway, welcome to rehearsals, I heard all about your audition. I’m really excited to be working with you this year.” James turned and began walking further into the auditorium, clearly intending for Blaine to follow him. “Today is just a read-through, but hopefully at our next rehearsal I’ll get to see some of those acting skills I’ve heard so much about.” James winked at Blaine and left him standing with the rest of the cast as he jogged the rest of the way to the front of the auditorium and vaulted himself up on the stage next to the director.

The read-through went as well as could be expected for a community theatre, but Blaine was distracted the whole time. The actors that made up the cast ranged from first timers to semi-professionals and Blaine was starting to wonder how exactly he’d landed the role. He was good, he knew that, but he wasn’t sure he was good enough to have beaten out some of the other guys that made up the ensemble. As they went through the script he made notes here and there, although by the end of the read the notes had devolved into doodles that heavily featured the initials “KH”.

It had been a couple weeks since Blaine had been forced to take Kurt to the airport and all he could think about was seeing him again at Christmas. He just had to make it to Christmas. The closer winter break got the slower time dragged. Blaine tried everything to make time go faster; he threw himself into his work, he ignored work completely and started making a list of things he wanted to do when he was in New York with Kurt, he spent hours a day rehearsing for New Directions or running lines for his show, he sat down and wrote long emails to Kurt, he cleaned his entire room, twice, and then re-arranged everything and cleaned it again. Nothing he did helped.

“1 week until you’re here,” Blaine shot off his daily count-down text to Kurt and smiled as the reply came back almost instantly.

“Can’t wait!” Blaine smiled down at the text message, not particularly thrilled by the message it contained but rather by the mere fact that it was from Kurt. This year was seriously driving him mad, and it was going to make it even harder to tell Kurt that only half the schools he’d applied to were in New York. He never wanted to be that kid who went to a school just to be close to their significant other and ignored any of the schools that could actually be really good for him. But at the same time, he wasn’t sure he could do another year like this. Hell, there were times he wasn’t even sure he could handle the rest of this year.

And Blaine knew that he would love New York, he would love it even if he hated the school there, because he would be there with Kurt. But at the same time, there were some schools, some really really good schools, which just…weren’t in New York. Chicago was amazing, Lawrence would be great if he could get in to the vocal program, UCLA, Berkley, Northwestern and Georgetown were all really great universities. Blaine knew that he would fit in at any of those schools, and he would do well at many of them, but without Kurt he wasn’t sure he even wanted to go to any of them anymore. Blaine knew that the only person looking forward to his being in New York next year more than he was, was Kurt. It was almost daily that Kurt would say something about “when you’re here” or “when we’re together” or “I can’t wait until we can see each other more.” And every time he said it Blaine hated himself for not telling Kurt that there was even a possibility that he wouldn’t be moving to New York in August.

Blaine, however, had promised himself that he would not needlessly worry Kurt until he knew for sure where he was going. There was no guarantee that he would even get in to any of the schools he was applying to, let alone any of the ones not in the city. And, who knew, maybe he would get a great offer from Columbia or NYU or Pace. There were some really amazing schools in New York. And Kurt. There was Kurt in New York.

With two days left before Christmas break, Blaine wandered through his day in a haze, not really paying attention to what he was doing or what was going on. He was completely out of it all through rehearsal and, unfortunately, it did not go unnoticed.

“Is there something wrong?” James asked, coming up to him during a break.

“Hmm?” Blaine hummed his response, turning slowly to face James.

“You’ve been kind of…spacey today.”

“Oh, sorry,” Blaine apologizes, laughing self-consciously. “It’s nothing, really.”

“Clearly it’s something,” James pushed. He was not going to let this go before he knew precisely what was up with his star.

“It’s really-” Blaine started to protest again but stopped mid-sentence, deciding for whatever reason to tell James the truth. “I’m just ready for Christmas to be here.” He paused. James waited. “My, uh, my boyfriend is coming back to Lima for Christmas.”

“Ah-ha, well, that’s certainly a worthy distraction.” James smiled, but it wasn’t quite his usual smile. “Coming back from where?”

“New York.” As Blaine spoke the words he perked up noticeably, a sparkle of pride gleaming in his eye. “He moved there last year. He’s, uh, he’s an actor, too.”

“Oh, yeah?” James continued to push Blaine to talk – it was definitely helping, and James didn’t mind the extra information.

“Yeah. He’s starting a national tour in January, though. But he’ll be here for Christmas, and then I’ll be in New York for a few days and…” Blaine cut himself off, stopping before he finished with “and I’m moving there after I graduate.” He hadn’t even realized he was thinking it until he almost said it.

“…and?” James prodded, wondering why Blaine cut himself off.

“And, uh, I’m really proud of him,” Blaine bluffed. James, though not at all convinced, nodded and smiled, patting Blaine on the shoulder before making to leave.

“Try to focus, will ya?” he called over his shoulder as he walked down the aisle, leaving Blaine once more alone with his thoughts.