Chapter 4

The next morning Kurt woke up knowing he had fallen asleep not long before midnight but feeling completely restless. He had been thinking about what his dad had said and he understood that maybe he was being too hard on Blaine. He decided to enjoy his time with him without making a big deal of his sexuality. If he liked Blaine, him being bi wouldn`t change anything.

So Kurt got up, took a shower and picked an outfit, he decided to go with something chic but not over the top, selecting a pair of jeans, a turtleneck and a checked blazer, with his Dr. Martens high boots and a pin for dramatic effect. He styled his hair and went downstairs to find his dad and Carol already having breakfast. They both gave him a knowing look and Carol offered him something to eat before leaving, he turned it down and said his goodbyes.

Once in his car it was just him and his thoughts again and he found himself wondering how was Blaine going to manage to not get recognized having coffee in a random coffee shop in Ohio. With a guy. He had to wash it off and just hope Blaine had thought that through.    

When Kurt got there he took a quick look and didn`t find Blaine. It was ok, it was still early after all. So he went to order his coffee, as soon as he got in line the door opened and he saw Blaine entering the coffee shop. His hair was free of the usual helmet of gel and that made him look even more beautiful. Kurt cursed at himself for being already lost in just how Blaine looked, he would have to talk to him looking at a random spot over his shoulder if he couldn`t control his tendency to squeal around the guy. This was going to be an interesting morning.

Blaine made it to where he was in line, staying close to him, smiling and maybe staring a little while he said good morning. He said it back and now took in what Blaine was wearing, dark blue jeans and a blue, white and red windbreaker. It was quite more simple and loosen than what he had seen him wear on tv or magazines before. He wasn`t wearing a bowtie for starters. Kurt thought that, on one hand, it was quite easy to tell this was Blaine, but on the other hand there was a little something that was different, laid back, and that may be what saved him from being recognized. There was also a weird feeling, like it was special to get to see this version of Blaine.

They stayed in silence, just stealing little looks at each other until it was their turn in line. It wasn`t an akward silence, it was somehow comfortable. When they placed their orders and were asked their names Blaine quickly said “Cooper”, it took Kurt by surprise and he had to make an effort to not double-take at Blaine, who just looked at him, a completely normal expression on his face. Then both of them went to take their wallets, but Blaine stopped Kurt saying, “Don´t you dare, I asked you.”

“Well, I`m not sure. Technically I asked you here.” Kurt teased, but put his wallet away.

Blaine just gave him an exasperated look. It was adorable.

When they had their coffees, Blaine directed Kurt to a secluded table at the back of the shop, he looked at Kurt apologetically and he understood and nodded, smiling a little. It wouldn´t had been wise from Blaine to expose himself more. Kurt then remembered something he had intended to ask.

“Why Cooper?” He asked turning to look at Blaine right in the eyes. Yeah, still gorgeous, he thought. And cursed at himself when he realized he was starting to blush. Blaine didn`t seem to notice.

“It`s my brother`s name. It has to be a name I said frequently, which rolls right in my tongue. If I try to be inventive I stumble upon the word and give myself away.” Blaine explained.

“Wow. That`s a lot of theories.” Was all Kurt could say.

Blaine laughed. But then he looked at Kurt in the eye and asked sincerily, “Am I scaring you with this?”

“No, it`s ok. It`s a little weird, but I`m not freaking out.”

“Yet.” He added as an after thought.

Blaine looked at him, smiled and went to explain himself. “It`s not always like this, I`m just trying to be careful. People sort of expects me to be in Ohio once in a while so it`s harder around here. I wouldn´t do that in LA or New York except there were paparazzi around or the barista was looking at me funny.”

Kurt just smiled a little at him and went to change the subject. Enough fame talking for him.

“Wait, you´re living in LA or New York right now?” He asked realising that was quite important information and he really had no idea what Blaine was working at.

“I´m about to start filming a movie in New York for the next few months. I´m not sure how it goes after that, yet.”

Then they talked about nothing and everything for what felt like hours. Blaine was so easy to talk to and Kurt felt so at ease. After they have talked about music and how they both had been in their high schools` glee club, (they had been so close to meeting so many times before!) there was another little comfortable silence in which they both just looked at each other, right in the eye. Then Blaine looked down to his lap, like announcing he was going to say something he was unsure about with his body language, and asked in a very sweet voice.

“Kurt, can I ask you something?”

Kurt was lost in how vulnerable and young Blaine could look at the same time and how beautiful his voice was but he managed to say “Yeah” in almost a whisper. He was so lost in just Blaine he hadn´t given himself time to prepare for the question.

“Are you uncomfortable with me being bi?” Blaine asked in that very same sweet voice.

Kurt looked at him, really looked at him. Not at his beauty, but at the nervous, unsure, honest guy behind that and shaked his head a little. But then he sighed, looked away and really considered the question. He felt he owed sincerity to such an honest, sweet guy.

“I´m not anyone to tell you how to feel or who you can or can´t direct your feelings to, Blaine.” He said, as he figured that was something he really believed.

“But...” Blaine added, like expecting Kurt to elaborate. When he didn`t, Blaine continued. “I´m not trying to push but you just seem uncomfortable with the whole thing.”

“No buts.” Kurt said but he couldn´t hold Blaine´s gaze.

He realized he had been caught and, without looking at Blaine, added “If I´d some sort of issue but I knew that it´s my own unresolved thing, couldn´t I just deal with it without getting you in this? Given I know I´m the one being unreasonable.”

Kurt really, really wanted to just know what his issue with bisexuality was. He couldn´t figure out why he had developed an issue at all. He knew it was unfair but he had always associated the concept with cowardice, or maybe he was just jealous that they were given a chance to hide. It wasn´t a belief he was proud of, it wasn´t something he wanted to say to this sweet, pretty guy in front of him so soon. It was a belief too full of a background that he wasn´t ready to share. Deep down he knew it had to do with how it had affected him not being able to hide and now he was taking it upon those who had had that chance. He wasn´t ready to tell Blaine all of that, to expose his scars like that.

“The thing is, no, you can´t dictate it, but if you´re unsure about it, it still affects me. It still means you´re unsure or uncomfortable or whatever it is with me, with a part of who I am.” Blaine told him.

“I´m not uncomfortable or unsure.” Kurt said, finally looking back at Blaine and trying to say without words that he didn´t think he could be uncomfortable with him, that it wasn´t about him, but about Kurt.

The other boy just held his gaze, waiting for more.

“Could I get some time to adjust to the idea and just...work with it as we go?” he asked softly.

Blaine´s eyes on him were so warm when they locked eyes again. Kurt felt he was being given the world because of something as simple as the sweetness in the way the other boy was looking at him.

“Whatever you´re comfortable with.” Blaine said, still looking at Kurt like he was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Kurt could hear his own heart beating way too fast.

“Thank you.” Was all he said, trying to convey into the sincerity in his words how much he wasn´t just thanking him for the time to think but for everything, for understanding, for not pushing further, and for what Blaine was making him feel.

They shared a few minutes of a silence that wasn`t awkward, despite the moments before. Blaine broke it asking Kurt about his holidays and they lost themselves in tales of his parents` weirdness and his brother`s childish manners. It got both of them laughing until they were breathless. Kurt asked Blaine about his Christmas time but let it go when he didn`t elaborate.

When they were already done with they second refill and the morning was turning into noon, Blaine announced he would have to leave soon. He was flying back to New York that same afternoon because he was expected for the first day of filming the morning after.

Both boys stood up and made their way to the parking lot walking close to each other. Blaine walked Kurt to his car. When they got to it Kurt turned, leaning onto his car a little and standing close to Blaine.

Blaine was looking at him adoringly, impossibly long eyelashes fluttering, and without saying anything he took Kurt`s hand, holding it at their sides. Shivers ran through Kurt`s whole body when their fingers intertwined.

“That was nice... Surreal, but nice.” Kurt said looking at Blaine nervously and then at their clasped hands.

Blaine`s face turned into a grin.

“Did you just quote Notting Hill at me?” He asked supressing a laugh and failing at it.

Kurt looked away knowing he was already blushing like a little girl.

“Hey! It suited. And you weren`t supposed to figure that out.” He said, pressing a finger at Blaine´s chest, accusingly. He felt as if his finger was burning between them and made himself pull away.

“It is a great movie.” Blaine said matter of factly, like taking the whole situation very seriously. “And that would make me Julia Roberts, something I can not argue against.”

“Oh no. I would have to take it back. There`s no way a Julia Roberts` character was an option and you`re getting away with it.”

Blaine laughed, his eyes shinning, and looked at Kurt right in the eye again.

“It was really nice.” He then said, leaning to kiss Kurt`s cheek. He squezed his hand and let go of it, turning and walking to his own car.