AN: As you might be able to guess, I don't like Finn. Never have, never will. For all I care he can take his riffle to Alaska and start a Rachel worshipping cult there. I'm sure Mr. Schuester would love to join him...

Chapter 14: All I want for Christmas…

Kurt

It was the week before Christmas at William McKinley High School and Kurt watched as couples exchanged presents in the hallways and the Glee couples sang flirty duets and kisses under the mistletoe Puck had hung in the choir room.

"Watching them makes me want to regret breaking up with Finn again," Rachel sighed from her place next to him. Apparently Finn not even defending his own girlfriend against Karofsky when he had slushies Kurt and her, had been the breaking point for the couple, and maybe it was mean to think that, but Kurt was happy not to be the only one who was lonely.

"Stay strong," he told her. "You said it yourself – you deserve better. You deserve a boyfriend who isn't afraid to stand up to bullies when they are trying to hurt you."

Mercedes sat down on his other side and sighed as well. "We'll just have to make it like our idols. They were solo too while they were working on their careers." Mercedes had confided in them during one of their trips to the mall that she had more than a crush on Sam, who was unfortunately dating Quinn.

Santana and Brittany had each other, even if no one was supposed to know that, Puck always had a different girl hanging off his arm each week and Artie was dating a girl he met in the AV club. Mike and Tina were the couple dating the longest in the club and Blaine had mystery coffee guy now – well he had seen him getting out of a car once, but Blaine had never talked about him again with Kurt.

So not counting Finn, the three of them could form a lonely-hearts club. He didn't even want to know what he would feel like around Valentine's Day – not that he cared for holidays like that, thank you very much – if he already felt this lonely around Christmas.

Suddenly, the bane of his existence was right in front of him, a cheerful smile on his face. "Don't you just love Christmas?" Blaine asked excitedly and Kurt rolled his eyes. He most certainly hadn't liked Christmas in the past, because it had usually meant sitting home alone while his parents were out getting drunk and having to deal with his drunk father when he got home.

"Which reminds me, Kurt. Mr. Schue still hasn't done the set list for the Christmas concert and so I was wondering if you'd audition with me with 'Baby, it's cold outside'. I think our voices would work well together on this one."

Kurt blinked, because did Blaine seriously think a high school in Ohio would let two guys sing this song? "You should sing with Rachel. You sound amazing together and you know Mr. Schuester would never let us perform it."

Blaine shrugged. "Yeah, but you could still sing it with me. His loss if he doesn't pick us."

Kurt shook his head. It wasn't like he didn't want to sing with Blaine, but he had been doing so well lately on the Blaine front – keep telling yourself that, his heart interrupted – and singing with him would just take him back to square one.

"I have another song planned already," he informed Blaine, before sharing a look with Mercedes, hoping she would back him up.

"Yeah, Kurt and I are going to duet on 'All I want for Christmas' because we both wanted to sing it and it seems fair that way," she saved him and Kurt shot her a grateful smile.

"Thanks, Mercedes," he told her once Blaine was gone. "I told you you could have the song and I stand by it, but thanks for not telling Blaine. It would just suck if we gave a good performance and then are told no because we are two boys," he lied but Mercedes looked deep in thought for a moment.

"You know, it's actually not a bad idea – the duet. You haven't sung much since Sectionals but I thought you were good. Us divas have to stick together," she suggested and Kurt gave her a proper smile. Ever since their first trip to the mall, he and Mercedes were growing closer as well and now that he knew what it felt like to have friends, he was seriously regretting pushing people away for all those years.

"Come on," she grabbed his hand and pulled him down next to the piano and started marking the two different parts on the sheet music. Kurt nodded and Mercedes announced their song as soon as Mr. Schuester returned from an errand.

Kurt thought they sounded good together, but Mr. Schuester was frowning when they finished. "That was really nice, Kurt, Mercedes, but I think for the Christmas concert we should stay more traditional and have one person sing it. We do need donations for the club," he told them and Kurt sank back down onto his chair, trying not to show that the decision hurt him, while Mercedes kept arguing with Mr. Schuester, but to no avail.

He knew he shouldn't put any stock in what his mom was saying about him, but he was seriously starting to wonder if he was as good as he thought. True, he had a few lines during Sectionals, but now that he thought about it, everyone in the club had. Maybe Mr. Schuester just kept him around because he needed a twelfth member to be able to compete.

Rachel and Blaine performed a flawless rendition full of cutesy gestures and chasing one another around the choir room, and Kurt could help but be jealous even though Rachel was a girl and he had suggested it. He wasn't surprised at all, when Mr. Schuester immediately agreed to let them sing together.

He needed some fresh air he realized, but before he could leave without anyone noticing him, Blaine was suddenly next to him. "You okay?" he asked as they were walking toward the door, but before he could answer, Rachel called out to them and they both stopped in the doorway.

All of a sudden, the whole club was chanting, "kiss, kiss, kiss," and Kurt looked up to see they were standing under the mistletoe. He slowly turned to face Blaine, who was frozen next to him, before he looked at Kurt and started to stutter.

"Uhm, I, I don't, ah, you know, it's not…" Kurt didn't give him the chance to finish what would have been without a doubt an elaborate excuse and ran away before anyone could stop him. Blaine could have at least kisses him on the cheek if he didn't want to kiss him instead of humiliating him in front of the whole club, he thought as he rounded a corner and ran straight into Dave fucking Karofsky. Merry Christmas to me, Kurt thought.

Blaine

Blaine unfroze seconds after Kurt ran away, cursing himself. Yes, he had wanted to kiss Kurt but if they ever got a first kiss together – and that was starting to become a big if – he didn't want it to happen under a mistletoe in front of all their friends. But now that he had seen Kurt's reaction he wasn't so sure anymore that he had done the right thing. Kurt probably thought he hated him, or found him deeply unattractive because he wouldn't even kiss him under a mistletoe.

"I swear Hobbit. If you don't run after him right now, I'm going to kick your ass back to the Shire," Santana suddenly growled and one look at her expression sent him running.

He hoped Kurt would run to the bleachers as he usually did and ran down the corridor leading to the back door. He froze again though the moment he rounded a corner, because Kurt was there, but he wasn't alone. He was pressed against a locker, and Blaine's stomach churned when he realized who it was who had him pressed against it.

Karofsky's lips were on Kurt's and he felt his heart break, because he was indeed too late. And it was probably his fault that Kurt thought he couldn't do any better than a closeted jock who bullied him.

Tears were welling up in his eyes and he turned around and raced to his own locker to grab his school bag, glad he didn't take it to the choir room with him, because no way was he going back there right now.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, he kept telling himself on the drive home, because there was no way Kurt would ever go near someone like Karofsky if he thought he had other options. "Fuck," he yelled when he reached a stop sign, and hit the steering wheel. He had never told Kurt that just coffee had stay just coffee. If his dad had been right and Kurt liked him too, he had probably given up on him because he thought Blaine was dating someone.

His dad's car was already in the driveway when Blaine arrived home and he ran inside and launched himself into his dad's arms.

"You were right," he sobbed. "I was too late." His dad's strong arms wrapped around him and Blaine pressed his face against his father's shoulders, turning his shirt damp with his tears.

"Did you talk to Kurt?" his dad finally asked and Blaine shook his head before telling his dad everything that had happened during and after Glee.

"Well maybe you are not too late then," his father said, when Blaine had finished, and Blaine looked up, afraid to get his hopes up but still wanting to believe his dad was right.

"If Kurt is really just seeing this other boy because he thinks he has no other options, you need to let him know that he does. And even if he isn't interested anymore, someone has to talk to him, because we didn't get Kurt out of one abusive relationship just so he can get trapped in the next one," his dad added more seriously and Blaine paled because he hadn't even thought about it like that.

Kurt had endured his father's abuse because he had thought there was nothing he could do. What if he was doing the same with Karofsky. No, his dad was right. He had to talk to Kurt. He had already caused enough damage, because he had thought he was doing the right thing. He had just wanted to protect Kurt, but instead he had made things even worse. He would totally understand if Kurt would never want to talk to him again, after he confessed his feelings.

"So are you going to talk to him?" his dad interrupted his internal monologue. "You know I'm going to invite him over for Christmas."

Blaine nodded, resolved to finally do the right thing. "New Year's Eve. I'm going to do in on New Year's Eve so we can both have a fresh start if he wants to," he proclaimed and his dad gave him a proud smile.

"I really hope, all works out well, kiddo."

Kurt

Kurt froze the moment he collided with the big jock, fear cursing through his veins. The hallway was empty and he had no idea what Karofsky was even doing there as the football season at McKinley was over for the year.

"What to you want?" he forced out. "I'm sure Blaine will be here any minute." At least he hoped Blaine would run after him. Karofsky chuckled darkly.

"I've seen the way you look at Hummel and I gotta tell you. Never gonna happen. You should just give in to me. I'm your best chance of ever getting any action." Kurt could feel the bile rise in his throat, because no matter how desperate he was, he would never touch Karofsky willingly.

"I'd rather die alone," he spat, "before I let you anywhere near me."

Suddenly his back was against a locker, his hands pinned to his sides. "Too bad you don't have much of a choice," he whispered into his Kurt's ear and Kurt fought the urge to vomit as the smell of stale burgers reached his nose. Before he could say anything Karofsky was on him again, but released him moments later, as the sound of someone running was echoing through the hallway.

Karofsky must have realized where they were, because he took a step back, before he gave Kurt a cocky smile. "Think about my offer. You can't do any better than me," he said before walking off, leaving Kurt a shaking mess.

Once he was sure Karofsky wasn't coming back he dashed into the next bathroom and started dry heaving over the toilet, but nothing came up because he had skipped lunch again.

He sank down on the floor and pulled his knees up to his chest trying to calm himself down. It didn't matter what Karofsky said, or his mom, even if the other boy were the last man on earth he wouldn't go there. He had suffered enough abuse in his life already, the last thing he needed was a boyfriend who bullied him in public because he was too scared to tell people the truth or just accept the truth. For all he cared, Karofsky could stay in the closet for the rest of his life as long as he stopped abusing other gay people.

The choir room was empty but thankfully unlocked when he finally went back to retrieve his bag, making his heart clench when he realized that Blaine hadn't come looking for him. The parking lot was nearly empty as well, apart from a few cars in the teacher's lot, and Kurt tugged his thin coat tighter around himself to protect himself from the icy wind, as he started his walk home.

He cursed himself for using the borrowed money for a nice outfit that had been pointless instead of on a warmer coat, as his whole body started to shake. The previous winter he had worn many layers underneath his coat to keep warm, but now that he was used to getting picked up and dropped off at home, he had forgone them and was now paying the prize.

The house was cold and empty when he finally reached it, snow stuck in his hair and on his coat, dampening the material and chilling him to the bone. He quickly shed his layers and stepped into his bathroom, only to realize that the water heater was acting up again, which meant his mom still hadn't gotten it fixed like she had promised she would.

He was already coughing by the time he was bundled up under his blankets, trying to get himself warm, and by the time he fell asleep a few hours later – his mother had never come home – his nose was clogged and he was having trouble breathing.

The next morning he couldn't deny it anymore that he was sick, because he felt too weak to even drag himself upstairs for a cup of tea. The clock told him it was already after nine, but so far his mom hadn't shown up. If she had even come back. He sank back onto the pillows hoping he would just be able to fall asleep again, but his throat was hurting him, and every time he coughed, his lungs hurt as well.

At some point he must have fallen back asleep, because he was suddenly shaken awake. His mother glared at him when he finally managed to lift his head.

"Why aren't you in school?" she asked. "Do you want me to get problems with social services?" Kurt sniffled. "I'm sick," he informed her between coughing, even though that should be obvious.

"Fine. I'm going over to Mandy's. Don't make a mess," she told him before she left him alone to take care of himself. Kurt groaned because he could really use a few cold meds or just a simple cup of tea. At least he wasn't really missing anything at school and because he wasn't featured in the Christmas concert either, he really had no reason to go back any time soon.

Around noon, he realized he really couldn't stay in his bed anymore without drinking some liquids and so he tightened his blankets around his shoulders and slowly made his way up the stairs. Unsurprisingly they didn't have any tea at home, so he forced himself to drink hot water with the lemons his mom used for her cocktails.

He was ready to fall asleep again on the couch when there was a knock on the front door and Kurt dragged himself over to open it. Rachel was standing outside, bundled up in a thick winter coat, and she immediately looked worried when she saw what he looked like.

Before he knew it she had ushered him back onto the couch and had fluffed his pillow, before she called some place that apparently delivered soup.

"You know I'm a vegan so I really have no idea how to make chicken noodle soup," she shrugged, "and that's what people in the movies always eat when they are sick."

"Not that I'm not grateful, but what are you doing here?" Kurt croaked when Rachel sat down next to him. "Neither Blaine nor you were in school today, so I drove to his house because I wanted to make sure he wasn't getting sick before the concert. When nobody answered I thought he might be with you, because of what happened yesterday."

Kurt shook his head, before tears started steaming down his face, which he quickly wiped away but Rachel had of course already seen.

"What's wrong Kurt?" she asked after handing him a tissue and taking his hand. She was probably going to think he was pathetic but he couldn't hold it in any longer.

"I really like Blaine, Rachel. Like like him and I knew he doesn't feel the same but it still hurt when he just left me standing there in front of everyone. I've tried so hard to get over him, but it's like my heart doesn't want to," he sobbed into her embrace, letting her stroke his back while he cried.

"I'm so sorry Kurt. We didn't know this would happen. We thought," "Rachel?" Kurt lifted his head from her shoulder and looked at her puzzled.

"We all thought Blaine liked you too and was just too shy or stupid to make a move, so we made sure you'd end up under the mistletoe together so something would finally happen," she explained, looking incredibly guilty and Kurt paled because had he really been that obvious? But hadn't she said they wanted Blaine to make a move?

"Why do you think he likes me? He made it incredibly clear when we went out together that we were just friends and nothing more." "It's just, the way he looks at you sometimes. Maybe he doesn't even know it himself yet, but we thought if we gave him a push in the right direction, he would finally realize that he is in love with you." Kurt gaped at her because there was no way Blaine could be in love with him. Rachel must be mistaken, because why would Blaine date someone else, if he was in love with him.

"He has boyfriend, Rachel. He is not in love with me, as much as it pains me to say it." Rachel shook her head. "No, he doesn't. I've asked him when I forced him to go Christmas shopping with me. There's no reason for him to lie to me."

Kurt's head was spinning. Because if Blaine really liked him and didn't have a boyfriend, then why was he acting so weird around him when they were together now. And why did he constantly make sure, Kurt knew he was his best friend – emphasis on friend? Nothing made sense and he felt a headache coming on.

"I think I'm going to take another nap. Can you wake me when the soup arrives?" he asked her before closing his eyes, and trying to push all thoughts of Blaine to the back of his mind.

He didn't go to school the next day either, but the cold medication Rachel had picked up for him while he was asleep was helping him breath easier now, and climbing up the stairs didn't feel like climbing Mt. Everest anymore.

To his surprise, he had another visitor in the afternoon. Blaine's dad was standing on his doorstep, a Tupperware container in hand. "Rachel told Blaine you are sick. He wanted to come himself, but was busy rehearsing for the concert," Burt explained and Kurt stepped aside to let him in.

"Are you feeling any better?" Burt asked after Kurt had finished his soup and Kurt nodded. "Your mom not home?" Kurt shook his head. "She, ah, is at work." He had no idea if it was the truth or not, but it sounded better than she doesn't give a shit if I'm sick or not.

"So you could use some company then, right?" Burt asked before he sat down in the old and worn down armchair. Kurt leaned back against the couch and listened to Burt as he told him about some funny customers he had had the past couple of days and Kurt envisioned – not for the first time – how his life would have turned out if Burt had been his dad. It left him with a warm feeling inside.

Still he tensed when he heard his mom's key in the door. Burt stood up to greet her and she immediately put on a fake smile when she spotted him.

"Mrs. Anderson. I just came by to invite Kurt to Christmas dinner, if this is okay with you. You can join us as well if you'd like," he added and Kurt tried not to look too hopeful. He knew she wouldn't let him go if she thought he really wanted to.

"I guess that's okay. I was going to take Kurt with me to visit some friends, but I guess that works as well," his mom told Burt and Kurt had to look away so she wouldn't see him smiling.

Things might be weird between him and Blaine at the moment, but he'd rather be awkward around Blaine than be home alone for Christmas or worse having to spend it with his mom's drinking buddies.

"Great. Try to get healthy Kurt, and Blaine or I will come by to pick you up on Friday," Burt told him, before he pulled him into a brief hug. Kurt readied himself for the inevitable harsh words as soon as Burt left, but his mom just ignored him and went upstairs with a bottle of wine. Maybe even she couldn't avoid the Christmas spirit, Kurt thought before his eyelids started to drop again, and he fell asleep on the living room couch.

It was even more awkward than he had expected when he first arrived at Blaine's because they hadn't seen each other since their not-kiss in the choir room. Neither of them made eye contact at first and Kurt was glad Blaine's dad made small talk with him, while they cooked dinner together.

Burt had assured him he had a delivery service on speed dial that would deliver on Christmas Eve as well, should they burn the food, but Kurt was confident that wouldn't be necessary. As long as he kept his focus on the food instead of Blaine who was hovering awkwardly, all should be well.

"I missed you during the concert," Blaine finally addressed him after they had eaten dinner in silence, in the colorfully decorated living room. Some of the ornaments on the tree, Kurt even remembered from when they were kids, and he was touched to see that one he had decorated was still there as well.

"I didn't feel well enough," Kurt lied because in reality he just hadn't wanted to watch the others sing when he wasn't allowed to.

"It's too bad. You and Mercedes sounded amazing and I wish Mr. Schuester wasn't such a dick. Sorry, dad," he quickly added but Burt waved him off. "I'm not too fond of the guy either. Some teacher," he muttered causing Kurt to chuckle.

"I'm sure you and Rachel sounded great together though," he told Blaine as a peace offering. Blaine suddenly found his empty plate quite interesting. "I still would have rather sang with you," he admitted and Kurt's heart skipped a beat. Was it too much to ask that Blaine made up his mind about what he wanted from them.

Their eyes locked for a moment before Burt clapped his hands. "Time for presents. Grab you coat, Kurt," he announced and Kurt raised an eyebrow in question before complying.

He had no idea why he was being led into the garage, but put his hand over his mouth in shock when he saw what was wrapped in a giant bow. A huge card was attached to the green Ford, and when Kurt took a step forward he could read that it said 'Merry Christmas, Kurt'.

Kurt turned to face the two beaming Hummels. "You got me a car? I, I can't accept that. It's too much," he stuttered.

"Yes you can. I actually got paid to get rid of it, but Blaine convinced me to let him rebuild it for you," Burt explained and Kurt's jaw dropped. Blaine was quick to explain though that his dad was exaggerating and that he had only done a little bit himself.

Before he knew it Kurt had launched himself first in Blaine's arms and then in Burt's. No one had ever done something so nice for him before and he couldn't believe this was happening to him.

"We figured you'd want to have something to drive with after you take your driving test next months," Blaine explained. "Though I hope you'll still want to drive to school with me," he added with a bashful smile. This guy really was the king of mixed signals, Kurt thought.

Still in shock, Kurt followed the Hummels back inside where he was forced to accept more gifts from the two men- gift cards for the mall to his delight – and Kurt felt mildly embarrassed by the few presents he had been able to afford himself.

Blaine was beaming at him though when he was putting on his Kurt Anderson original bow tie that Kurt had made for him, and Burt seemed happy about his new Mellencamp CD as well, so he knew he shouldn't fell too bad that he would never be able to repay them.

His mom's gift to him had been a reminder that he was to behave himself and not embarrass the family, so he really couldn't be more grateful that the Hummels had included him in their Christmas celebrations.

"You are welcome to stay the night," Burt offered when the clock struck eleven, but Kurt shook his head. He knew better than to stay out all night without his mother's permission and he didn't want her to ruin his Christmas by accusing him of doing all sorts of unsavory things if he didn't come home.

With a last look at the car that was his now, but would remain in the Hummels' garage until he got his license, he climbed into Blaine's Navigator and they quietly sang along with the songs on the radio as Blaine drove him home.

The house was dark when they arrived and Blaine walked him up to the front door though Kurt had protested and told him it wasn't necessary.

Suddenly, Blaine leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before he whispered, "Merry Christmas, Kurt."

Kurt kept staring after his car until it turned the corner, his gloved hand pressed against his right cheek.

Yes, it was definitely about time Blaine made up his mind, because this whole hot and cold behavior of his got harder to endure every day.