CHAPTER 6: Alone

Lima, OH, June 14, 2010, Kurt aged 17

Two days after Elisabeth's deadly accident, Blaine was lying on Kurt's bed holding Kurt as close as possible. They had both spent most of the time crying ever since they had left the hospital were they had to confirm that the woman was indeed Elisabeth Hummel, and although Kurt seemed to have calmed down, Blaine could still hear the occasional sob escaping Kurt's lips. They had both lost someone who was very important to them and so the best they could do at the moment was comfort each other as best as they could.

Blaine knew that Kurt was not just – as if that could ever be a just – grieving, but he was also worried about his future. He didn't had any relatives close by, other than homophobic grandparents in Kentucky he hadn't, as far as Blaine knew, seen in years and he knew that Kurt definitely didn't want to move away from the place his mother was going to be buried in.

"Tell me about your dad. You never really talk about him. What is he like?" Blaine asked once Kurt had calmed down enough to hold a conversation. "He is a homophobic asshole, who's probably going to take me away from here and move me to ass-backwards Texas, where his perfect new son can show me how to be a man," Kurt spat and promptly dissolved in tears again. Once he stopped shaking Kurt continued his rant.

"I've been telling my dad I have a girlfriend for years now, just so that he treats me the same as Finn. No that he treats me the same. It's always Finn this and Finn that before he asks me if I'm still into music, and wasn't it about time I stopped prancing around in weird clothes, because people are gonna assume I'm a fag – girlfriend or not."

"Yeah, well. If he can't see how amazing you are, he doesn't deserve you. Wasn't that what you've told me about my parents?" Blaine interrupted. Kurt was already feeling bad enough as it was; there was no need for him to put himself down as well. "Just tell your dad you don't want to move away from here where you're friends and your house are," Blaine suggested.

"And even if he makes you move to Texas; I promise it's going to be okay. You'll be eighteen in a year. You could just come back for your senior year." "But I don't want that! I don't want to lose you too!" Kurt sobbed into Blaine's shoulder. "Hey, you are not going to lose me. This is our worst case scenario; and we will make it work if we have to – I believe in us." Blaine tried to comfort Kurt. Kurt's next words were muffled, because his face was still pressed into Blaine's shoulder.

"It's just not fair! Why my mom? What did she ever do to anyone? I'm glad I don't believe in God, because this would be proof enough that he doesn't exist." Blaine didn't know how to answer this. Religion was one topic they had never really discussed, but Blaine could understand Kurt's frustrations.

Because of Blaine's religious upbringing, he however, had to convince himself that God didn't punish Elisabeth for giving two gay teens shelter. He would never voice these concerns in front of Kurt though, who was currently clutching the front of his t-shirt mumbling what ifs into Blaine's shoulder.

Blaine was at a loss for what to do. He knew he should comfort Kurt like a good boyfriend, but in the end he needed comfort as much as Kurt did, because Elisabeth, in the short time he had known her, had been more of a mother to him, than his own had ever been. "It's going to be okay. We're going to figure it out," Blaine murmured into Kurt's hair, probably more for his own benefit than Kurt's.

Austin, TX, June 14, 2010, Burt aged 37

Burt and Carole were sitting at the kitchen table, Burt with his head in his hands. Carole pushed a cup of coffee in front of him. "How did it go?" Carole asked. "He wants to stay up there. Says he couldn't leave the place behind where his mom is going to be laid to rest."

Burt raised his head to answer Carole's question before dropping it again. Burt had not expected to lose his ex-wife so young. At thirty-seven he was ready to take care of a family – as Carole and Finn proved – but he had no idea how his biological son, who he never had much in common with, would fit into all this.

"I don't think it would be a good idea to force Kurt to move down here with us," Carole interrupted his train of thoughts. "His whole world has just come crumbling down on him and the last thing he needs now, is to be uprooted from his save place." "And what if a change of scenery is what he needs? How can he get past this if he's reminded of his mother everywhere he goes?" Burt countered.

"Kurt is going to have a hard time dealing with this no matter where he lives. But at least in Ohio, he has friends who can help him through this. You haven't seen him for a few years – right now you are all basically strangers."

Burt knew Carole was right. Apart from a few phone calls and emails, he hadn't had much contact with his son, because he had never really understood him. It was time to step up to the plate. "Finn's not going to like it," Burt sighed. He liked the boy, but lately he had turned into a self-absorbed, arrogant, stereotypical jock.

"No, he's not. But Finn always makes friends fast. From what you've told me about Kurt, it'd be really bad to take him away from the few he has. And if anyone needs a change of scenery it's Finn. I don't like what he's turned into lately. Getting away from his so-called friends might be good for him."

Burt smiled at Carole. It was as if she could read his mind. Before Carole got up to clear the table she added: "Why don't we start looking for houses when we fly up for the funeral. I know your old one isn't big enough for the four of us, and Kurt would probably not want us to live there anyway."

"The house is Kurt's. Lizzy told me years ago, she put it into her will. And you're right; if we want Kurt and Finn to get along we need to make sure both of the boys have their own space." Carole kissed the top of Burt's balding head. "I'll make some arrangements then. Call Kurt and let him know."

Lima, OH, June 15

Kurt and Blaine were standing in front of Kurt's mirror, both wearing matching black suits. Kurt was struggling to fix his tie, a gesture that showed Blaine how nervous Kurt was. "Let me help you with that." Blaine untangled Kurt's tie and then quickly fixed the knot before tightening it around Kurt's neck.

"Have you heard from your dad?" Blaine asked while he was brushing imaginary lint from Kurt's shoulder. Kurt nodded once, but didn't elaborate. "Good news or bad news?" Blaine tried again. "I suppose it's good news," Kurt conceded. "They start looking for houses after the funeral."

"Great", Blaine gulped. "I'll start looking for an apartment later." "Don't be ridiculous! The house is mine. You can stay as long as you like – we'll figure it out. Just not right now. I'm sorry, I really can't focus on that now."

Blaine wrapped his arm around Kurt's shoulders to calm him down. "It's okay. I understand." Blaine let go of Kurt and offered him his hand. "Ready?" Kurt took Blaine's hand and together they walked up the stairs to the front door. "As I'll ever be."

Outside of Lima, OH, June 15

The Hudson-Hummel family was in their rental car on their way to the cemetery. Unfortunately their flight had been delayed, and Finn's constant whining and general refusal to cooperate had resulted in them being late for the funeral.

"And I still don't understand why I have to be here for this. It's not like I knew her," Finn, Carole's sixteen year old son complained yet again. Carole turned around to face the teenager and scowled at him.

"Kurt is Burt's son. Kurt just lost his mother. Kurt is family and we are going to treat him as such. We're here to support Kurt and show him that he is not alone! Now Finn, please stop complaining or I'm taking away your video games." That shut him up. She turned back to the front and asked Burt how much longer he thought it would take.

xXx

The family arrived at the cemetery fifteen minutes later, just as the coffin was being lowered into the ground. Burt was looking around for his son, until he spied a boy that looked like the pictures he had received. The boy was in the arms of a girl, Burt recognized as the girlfriend. Next to them was a dark skinned girl and a boy with gelled back black hair, both holding one of his son's hands. All four of them appeared to be crying.

Burt was about to walk over to the group when a hand on his arm stopped him. "Let them be. I don't think this is the right time for the reunion with the estranged father, Burt." Burt looked back over to his son. Carole was right. Kurt had friends who took care of him. What could Burt offer him but platitudes?

"Why don't we call the realtor and see if there are any houses she could show us this afternoon? Will just stay at a hotel and have breakfast with Kurt tomorrow morning." They walked back to the car where Finn was still sulking. "Good thing, I still have a key. We can surprise him with breakfast tomorrow."

Lima, OH same day, back at the house

Kurt's living room was filled with people all trying to express their regrets. Kurt had initially wanted to spend the afternoon alone, but Blaine and the girls had managed to convince him, that some company in the form of his friends would be good for him. For the past half hour Rachel and Mercedes' parents, some neighbors and half of the Warblers were mingling in the room, trying not to bump into each other.

Kurt was wedged between Rachel and Blaine on the couch, trying his best to put on a brave face and thank people for the flowers and the food, but after a while Blaine noticed that Kurt was barely keeping it together and asked everyone including Mercedes and Rachel to leave.

Both had expected Kurt's family to show up in the course of the afternoon, but Blaine knew that Kurt was relieved he didn't have to deal with them just yet. As soon as people had left, Kurt started sobbing into Blaine's shoulder again.

After a while his sorrow turned into anger and Blaine had to watch helplessly as Kurt was throwing plates and kicking over chairs. It had taken Blaine quite some time to calm down his boyfriend, but when Kurt finally collapsed in his arms, he picked him up bridal style and carried him downstairs to his bed.

When Blaine came out of the bathroom, where he had been looking for some tissues, Kurt was waiting for him completely naked. Blaine at first could just stare at him, because even though they had done some things, they had never been completely naked in front of each other.

"Kurt, what are you doing?" Blaine gasped and picked up the comforter from the floor to cover Kurt up. "Don't you want me? I want you. I don't want to wait anymore, knowing that I can just lose you tomorrow. Please, Blaine." Tears were streaming down Kurt's face again, while he was begging Blaine to touch him. Blaine wrapped the crying boy into the comforter, quietly pleading with him.

"Of course, I want you. But not right now, not like this. I would feel like I took advantages of you. When the time is right, I would love to sleep with you, but right now isn't the right time, okay. I'm not saying no, just not right now." During Blaine's monologue, Kurt had stopped crying and he now looked deeply ashamed. "I'm sorry. I'll just go to bathroom and get dressed," he mumbled. Kurt grabbed his discarded boxers from the floor and dashed into the ensuite bathroom. Blaine stripped down to his own boxers and crawled into the bed waiting for Kurt to reappear.

Thirty minutes later, Kurt came back into the room, freshly moisturized and looking oddly calm. He shed the t-shirt he had put on for his moisturizing routine and snuggled up to Blaine. The two boys fell asleep spooning each other and both fell into a fitful sleep they were woken from the next day, when someone loudly exclaimed: "What the hell?"