Feb. 14, 2013, 8:50 p.m.
Remember Me: Chapter 21
K - Words: 3,437 - Last Updated: Feb 14, 2013 Story: Complete - Chapters: 34/34 - Created: Oct 22, 2012 - Updated: Feb 14, 2013 1,121 0 2 0 0
The hours seem to drag like glaciers. Soon, it was nightfall and Blaine was shivering in his car, with the AC on full blast. He itched to switch to the heater function, but oddly enough the cold made his thoughts wander less. Every time he glance at his phone, he'd pray silently there would be a call from either of his parents, but to no such luck. Blaine scrolled through his contacts and would hover over the name Kurt Hummel, his thumb tempted to click on the call button. He needed to hear Kurt's voice because every time he heard it, it would soothe his insides, making him feel more at ease, but no, because Blaine had to constantly remind himself that Kurt broke up with him.
Fuck this, Blaine thought. He stepped on the gas pedal and began making his journey home. On the drive, his insides started to twirl. It was 11.47pm and Blaine was hoping that when he got home, his parents would be dead asleep by then so he could quietly sneak into his room. He hated the way his mother reacted to him coming out. It was patronizing, making him feel like he was stupid. When he was coming out to his parents, the only thing that was ringing in Blaine's mind was what Kurt had said to him.
"You're strong, Blaine. You came out to the school, you kissed me in front of everyone, you stood up to Puck. Your parents will just be another fear I know you'll overcome."
It gave him the strength he needed, the courage to utter the words.
Pulling into the driveway, his nerves started kicking in. Every living cell in his body started to mutiply, blood rushed to his head and the butterflies in his stomach were wild. Blaine felt vomit threatening to rise, but he swallowed it as he left the car and entered the house. Closing the door gently behind him, he snuck around the foyer like a secret agent on a mission. Tiptoeing through the door frame that led to the living room, he peeped his head in and was glad that no one was around.
The first stair creaked as Blaine slowly ascended up to the second floor. Every little noise sounded like a grenade exploding to Blaine. He wanted to go up to his room as invisible and quiet as possible, but his hope was crushed when he looked up and saw his father standing at the very top of the stairs.
Blaine halted, stunned and a little frightened at the sight of his father. He couldn't see his father's face, just the dark silhouette standing strong at the peak of the wooden staircase. Blaine dropped his stare to the ground quickly, and was about to resume making his way to his bedroom when his father spoke.
"Go to the living room. I'd like to speak to you." said Mr Anderson.
He was startled at the sudden deep, authoritative tone. Blaine obeyed immediately, turning back and desceding down the stairs and walked into the living room. His brain was swirling with different directions of where this could go. He thought about how his father could possibly kick him out of the house or he'e sent him off to an all boys military school in hopes that it would straighten him out. Blaine considered all these possibilities, but he never considered what his father was actually going to say.
He gulped as his father followed behind him into the great big living room. They both took a seat on the couch, neither saying a word to each other. Blaine gulped. The scenarios in his brain of what might transpire made him insides flutter. He rubbed his palms together, doing anything that might maybe make him feel less nervous.
"Blaine, have I ever told you about my high school years?"
Blaine was startled. The question felt so random Blaine had to reassure that he had heard it right. "Wh-what?" He stuttered out, his frown lines deep in his forehead. "My glory days in high school. Have I ever told you about it?"
"No, I don't think you have." Blaine kept his eyes fixed on his father's face, staring at him intently from the right side. Mr Anderson didn't turn to look at his son. His brown eyes, similar to Blaine's, stared far into the open space, like he was in a daze as he recalled his memories.
"When I was in high school," Mr Anderson explained, "I was, as you kids call it, in the popular crowd." Blaine smiled, glad that his dad was actually talking in a calm manner, than what he expected to be stern. "I was in the baseball team, but I was mostly reserved. I wasn't really very good. I invested my time a lot in studying than sports. But anyway, that's not the point. In the baseball team, there was this kid. I still remember his name, Jacob Banner. He transfered into the school as a junior, like I was at the time.The very day he transferred, word quickly got out that he was- he was gay. Which is why everyone was shocked when they saw him coming for the baseball try outs. Everyone literally laughed at his face. When we found out he was trying out for pitcher, we all laughed harder.
Everyone thought the kid was going to suck because he really didn't look like the athletic type, you know? He was bony and soft and just- just not the type of person you'd expect to see trying out for the baseball team. When he was up, everyone mocked him and teased him, including me." Mr Anderson said guiltily. "They handed him the ball when he got to the pithcer's mound. Everyone was taunting him, mocking him, saying he shouldn't even bother and things of that nature. Then he threw the ball. And everyone went silent."
There was a dazzling, shining look in his father's eyes, like he was picturing the event vividly. "The ball went straight to the catcher. The batter didn't even see the ball coming. Everyone's jaw hung low when the umpire yelled STRIKE!" Blaine jolted up, a little startled by the sudden increase of volume.
"They gave him the ball again. This time everyone was quiet, staring intently at the boy as he took another pitch. He threw the ball, and again the umpire yelled STRIKE! Murmurs were heard all around the stands. Everyone couldn't believe what was happening, neither did the coach. So, coach then decided to change the batter, to one of the strongest and best ones in the team. The guy is what you call a grade A asshole. He was the best in the team, and he knew it. He'd gloat about it a lot to get girls to go out with him. Anyway, the guy was all cocky. Smiling, blowing kisses to girls as he stood there waiting for Jacob to pitch.
He held the bat up and waited for the pitch. But before anyone realized it, the umpire yelled STRIKE! yet again. Everyone gasp, because that batter has won the school state championships and everything. He has not once let a ball go past him, until Jacob."
"Wow," Blaine said, in complete and utter amazement at his father's story. "Yeah, tell me about it." Mr Anderson replied. "Did he get into the team then?"
"Oh he did it alright, coach even bragged saying how putting him in the team would guarantee a state championship win, but Jacob turned it down." Mr Anderson turned to face his son and smiled.
"What- why?" Blaine asked.
"I looked for him after the try outs and I asked him the same thing, why did you turn it down. And his answer, to this very day, I remember clearly. He said - 'People are so stereotypical they think just because I'm gay I'm suppose to be subjected to be reading Broadway playbills or waving a rainbow flag above my head. People don't get that gays are still guys. That's why I tried out. To remind everyone that I'm still a guy, and I can do guy things too -"
"That's-"
"The point I'm trying to make here, Blaine," Mr Anderson interrupted his son, "is that it doesn't really matter to me what you are. If a scrawny gay kid could beat the strongest baseball player we had in the team, I don't see why different sexual orientations should matter. You're my son, and my love for you is unconditional. If gay is what you are, I accept you."
Blaine felt a tear stream down his cheek, his heart filled with warmth and comfort at his father's acceptance. He didn't restrain himself from attacking his father with a tight bear hug. "Dad, you d-don't know how much it means to me to hear you say that," Blaine said shakily, his tears falling fiercely down his cheek. "I've been so afraid of coming out, to you and mum especially- and to know that you accept me is just..I'm just- I'm so glad to hear you say that."
"A parent's love is always unconditional, Blaine." Mr Anderson said as he returned the hug. "What about mum?" Blaine asked nervously. Mr Anderson placed a warm, caring hand on his son's back as they pulled away from the hug. "Your mum was brought up according to the book, Blaine. She grew up religiously with a set of conservative parents. It's going to take some time for her to fully accept you, but I'll try my best to speed up that process, okay?"
"Dad- this is just-- just not what I was expecting to hear. I love you so much, dad." Mr Anderson simply smiled at his son's tears. He'd been wanting to reassure to his son that his sexuality didn't really matter the moment Blaine said he was gay, and now that he had, he had never felt closer to his son. "And about what you said earlier to your mother, about us neglecting you, I'm sorry son, there's not much I can do. Our job consist a lot of travelling, but knowing now how you truly feel, I'll try my best to ease up the out of town trips, alright?"
"I just miss you both, that's all. Feels like I only see you two every once a week, but yeah I understand. I'm just- I'm really relieved that at least you accept me, dad."
"I told you, unconditional love is rule number 1 of parenting." Mr Anderson smiled at his son, a similar grin as Blaine's. "Now you better go to bed, it's late." He got up and was almost out of the living room when he halted and turned around to look at his son. "One more thing," He said, getting Blaine's attention. Tears were still in his son's eyes, but he was glad there was a smile. "You also mentioned earlier to your mum that you're in love?"
"I am, dad." Blaine smiled.
"Is he a good guy?"
"He's- he's the best."
"Well, I don't know about your mum, but I'd sure like to meet him. When you're ready of course."
"Sure dad, I'll try to make that happen."
"Good. I'm going to bed now. Remember, Blaine, unconditional love." He gave a final smile to his son before going up to the bed room. Blaine sat there, smiling to himself, his tears flowing, but they were tears of joy. He never expected his dad to accept him so quickly. Everything felt possible to Blaine now. A huge relieve had been lifted off his shoulders and for the first time since he could remember, he felt truthfully liberated. Now more than ever he wanted to be with Kurt, with the knowledge that he didn't have to hide their relationship from anyone ever again.
He wiped the salty tears from his eyes and straighten himself out before going to his bedroom. He laid there on his bed, smile still intact. I can't believe what just happened, Blaine thought. Before the heart warming story his father told him, every scenario he pictured in his brain all led to him being kicked out of the house into the dark, cold night. Blaine felt as though he was on cloud nine, so glad and happy that at least his father accepted him.
Slowly as the night drew later, Blaine yawned, his eyes weighing a ton. As he slowly fell into slumber, he thought about the story of Jacob Banner and realized just how similar the boy was to Kurt. The confidence and strength that they both had were admirable to Blaine. He'd hope to be like that someday, courageous.
Blaine smiled again as the beautiful face of Kurt formed in his mind. The blue eyes, the red lips, the cheekbones, the long eyelashes. Falling into slumber completely, finally having some form of peace at mind, Blaine had no idea the horror that awaited for him when the sun would rise in the morning.
The basement that is Kurt's bedroom felt colder for some reason. Every little gush of air felt like winter came early, yet as Kurt woke up, he felt bits of sweat on his forehead. His entire body was tingling uncomfortably, weary but Kurt wasn't particularly sure why. He had went to bed early the night before so he didn't really understand why did he feel so lethargic still.
Pulling his covers tighter around his frame, he shivered. His hands were trembling and his vision was blury. The icky feeling in the pit of his stomach made him feel extremely nauseous and all Kurt wanted to do was have a sip of water because his throat felt really dry, but he felt like he didn't have the energy to even move a muscle.
Eventually, Kurt forced himself out of his bed. The moment he sat up right on the edge of the mattress, his head started to throb and everything he saw doubled. He realized he was sweating all over his body; his neck, his arms, his chest. He was literally drenched in sweat. Kurt stood up, and immediately lost his balance, falling back onto the bed.
"Ow," Kurt said to himself, as he massaged his temple with his thumb in hopes that it would ease his headache. He stood up again and stabled himself with whatever he could reach, silently thanking himself for deciding to place so many furnitures in his bedroom.
The cold hard tiles felt piercing as Kurt took a step into his bathroom. The carpet before felt more pleasant than the painful agony he was walking on. Turning on the faucet, Kurt flinched as the icy cold water made contact with his hands. He collected the water into his palms and gently washed his face, wanting so bad for the unpleasant sensation around his whole body to stop.
The water poured down like a high land waterfall, soaking Kurt's entire body. He felt tingly everywhere, like every part of his body felt sensitive to everything. He rubbed his eyes, trying to better his vision. Everything looked vague. Then his knees gave in, and Kurt crumbled to the cold hard bathroom tiles. He screamed in pain when his head hit hard on the ground, and then everything went dark and blank.
Sun rays burst through the seams of the curtains, igniting Blaine's bedroom into a bright green. Eyes fluttering at the sudden brightness, Blaine groaned, hating the fact that it was morning and he had school to go to, but just as he thought that, the conversation he had with his father the night before resurfaced in his mind and he smiled. For the first time, Blaine felt closer to his dad. He needed to tell Kurt. He needed to tell Kurt of the unexpected acceptance he got from his father. Kurt's going to be so happy for me, Blaine thought. He'd give anything to see that beautiful smile.
Throwing the covers off him, Blaine made his way to the bathroom and sped through his shower. He was excited for the day. He knew that this was an exceptional reason to talk to Kurt. Blaine threw on a polo tee and pulled on dark jeans. He glanced at the bottom of his closet and saw what he used to always complete his outfit with; the red letterman jacket. Since the day of the altercation with Puck, Blaine had decided to quit the football team. He didn't want to be in a team with a bunch of homophobes.
Blaine was halfway down the stairs when he heard soft mumbling coming from the kitchen, which made him halt in his spot.
"We didn't raise him that way. He never grew up in an environment where there were homosexuals-"
"Suzanne, things like these, it's not about how we brought him up. He's born that way. We're his parents. Don't you think we should create a safe environment for him where he feels accepted than-"
"No, Richard, because it's wrong. The lifestyle that he chose, is sinful and wrong and as parents, we're suppose to correct him of his mistakes-"
"Is it really wise to want to play the good parent card now? We've made him feel neglected, Suzanne. That's not how I planned on raising our only child. You need to accept that he's gay-"
"If I do, it goes against my beliefs-"
"He's our son! We have to love him no matter what-"
"I don't know if I can ever do that now Richard!"
The moment Blaine walked into the kitchen, both his parents looked at him. His mother quickly looked away and busied herself with the dishes. "Blaine, good morning-" Blaine nodded in response. "Urm- so what time are you guys flying off to China?" Mrs Anderson didn't respond to the question. She simply kept washing the dishes. "Noon," Mr Anderson said.
"Okay well, urm- have a safe trip. When will you be back?"
"In a week. Is that okay?"
"Yeah, I guess. It's your job after all." Blaine smiled. Truthfully, he was glad they were going off. He couldn't take how cold and hostile his mother was being to him not even wanting to look him in the eye. "Well I have to go- to school." He smiled and was about to take off when his father stopped him.
"Blaine, wait." He didn't turn around, Blaine simply stood there and waited for whatever that was to come.
"Suzanne, aren't you even going to acknowledge him anymore?"
"Don't, Richard."
"Suzanne, please."
You're strong, Blaine. Remembering what Kurt said to him, he spun around. "Mum, I know you can't accept me for now, and maybe you can never will. But I'm not going to change who I am. I didn't choose to be gay, it's who I am, and you know what? For awhile, I felt sorry for myself and I was afraid that nobody would accept me, you and dad especially, but then I met someone so amazing that made me realize that I don't need anyone else to accept me. I accept myself now, and if you can't make peace with my sexuality, then that's too bad, because I'm still me. I'm still your son."
He smiled at his dad before turning around and walking out of the house, feeling more liberated than ever. Finally the chains that he used to feel around him were gone. That was the last piece, to stand up to his mother. He was glad that everyone who mattered to him now knew his truth. Whether they accepted him or not, Blaine didn't really care anymore. He was glad that at least one of his parents accepted him.
Entering the school building, the first person Blaine sought out to look for was Kurt. He needed to tell Kurt about everything. Dodging students, turning corners, Kurt was nowhere to be found. He was glad when he saw Rachel Berry standing by her locker with her boyfriend Finn Hudson, making out.
"Rachel, sorry to interrupt- uh- this, but have you seen Kurt?" Blaine said as he approached the couple.
"Kurt? I haven't seen him. Maybe he hasn't arrived yet."
"If you see him, could you tell him I'm looking for him. Hi Finn," Blaine said, acknowledging the boy that towered over everyone else in the hallway. "Sure," Rachel smiled.
Blaine continued his search. Popping his head into every classroom in hopes that Kurt would be inside, but he came to no avail. When the school bell rang, Blaine groaned because he didn't have chemistry for first period, which meant he couldn't see Kurt right now. Just as he was about to enter his English class, his phone vibrated in his back pocket. He took it out and always leapt in joy when the caller ID read Kurt Hummel.
"Kurt! Hi Kurt I'm so glad you called me did Rachel tell you I was looking for you? Where are you-"
"Blaine?" A deep, morose voice came through. "Blaine's, it's Burt."
"Mr Hummel?" A sudden cold ran down his spine at Burt's tone.
"Blaine, something has happened to Kurt."
Comments
You handled it well and you PROMISED an update soon. Please keep your promise! :-)
This was really good. I am so glad that Blaine was able to stand up for himself and that his dad chose to accept him for who he was. I found myself getting really mad at his mother but it was really great to see that Blaine realized he didn't need her acceptance to be happy. I can't wait to see what happens next.