Kurt sat down on the bed in a huff, the mattress springs protesting his weight. He looked around the dark room he knew so well by now, everything seemed colder than usual. Even New York seemed colder than usual. He glanced at the door, knowing exactly who would be coming through it soon and sighed. He could stop this. He could end it all. All he had to do was say something to him, tell him he wanted to stop.

The problem was, he wasn't exactly sure he did want to stop. Kurt knew he should stop... But he definitely didn't want to.

"Why do you still have clothes on?" Came a familiar voice from the doorway.

Now or never, Kurt.

"I don't think we can keep doing this." He said as he began unbuttoning his shirt.

"Doing what?" The shorter boy took the seat next to him, mimicking his actions. "We aren't doing anything wrong." He paused, chancing a look at Kurt's face. "You need me, I need you. I think if anything, we should have started this a long, long time ago." He pulled the thin fabric from his torso completely and threw it to the floor, Kurt stared at the discarded article with disgust.

"I just-" he hesitated. "What if I don't want to anymore." Kurt's fingers froze in place on the second to last button.

"You can..." The dark figure helped him out of the rest of his button-up. "Do anything you want to do." He tossed it to the floor where it joined his own. "But I think..." He began kissing Kurt's slender neck. "You do want to keep doing this."

Kurt shivered under his touch. "N-no. I think I'm done here.." His voice was up an octave as the larger man laid him down backwards. "Please." He breathed. The older man just smiled and continued pressing his cold lips to Kurt's neck and collar bone. "A-"

"Shhh..." He shushed him, "you know you want this, Kurt. You know you don't want to be alone tonight. Just... Let go."

And with a sharp inhalation of breath, Kurt closed his eyes as tightly as he possibly could and complied.

He let go.

"It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside..."

The soft piano reverberated off the walls of the small coffee shop as Kurt sat waiting in the back.

The man behind the piano had dark hair and closed eyes. Kurt hadn't gotten a chance to fully look at him or his face clearly, but as he sang and struck the keys softly, Kurt imagined what it would be like to be the person being serenaded in the front row. For all of the attention to be on him. Just once.

"If I was a musician, oh but then again... No. Or if I sold potions in a traveling show. I know it's not much, but it's the best that I can do. My gift is my song and... This one's for you."

The longer the song went on, the more curious Kurt grew of the man behind this sultry voice. Mostly he just wanted to know what color his eyes were. The entire time the piano man had been playing, his eyes had remained shut. Kurt stood from his table, (abandoning his meeting spot with his--er, boyfriend?) and moved up closer to the performer.

"Anyway the thing is... What I really mean is yours are the sweetest eyes, that I've ever seen."

He took a seat in the front row, right where he had wanted to be a few seconds ago and closed his eyes. He imagined the man a few feet from him was singing the words directly to him.

"And I hope you don't mind, hope you don't mind... That I put down in words... How wonderful life is..." The performer finally stopped playing and opened his eyes, boring them straight down into Kurt. "How..." Kurt opened his eyes and met the other man's. They shared a smile, "wonderful life is... Now that you're in the world."

Hazel. The man's eyes were a warm meld of hazel and green. Completely and utterly deep and beautiful. "Like I could stare into them for days."

"Into what for what?" Adam asked suddenly, startling Kurt as he walked up to join him at the small table.

"Oh, nothing." Kurt smiled up at him. "You're late. I've been sitting here for over an hour." Kurt pursed his lips and looked back up to the stage, only to see it empty. He shook off the wave of disappointment he felt at the sight and looked back to Adam, who said nothing in his defense.

"Fell asleep. Sorry, I'm here now though."

"I'm glad. Ready to go?" Kurt rose from his seat.

"Oh. Yeah, I thought you wanted to talk?"

He had wanted to talk. That was why he called them both there. That was his original intention. But after seeing the piano man, after hearing someone sing so beautifully and with so much heart, Kurt found himself feeling more alone than usual. Alone with Adam. Which was better than being just simply, alone.

"I did." He feigned a smile. "How was your day?"

The shorter man looked at him quizzically as if he were searching Kurt's face for something else. "I drove 45 minutes for you to ask me something that could have just as easily been texted?" Adam furrowed his brows in confusion.

"I love the coffee here." Kurt replied flatly. And with that, he picked up his bag and headed for the door, oblivious to the small, dark-haired man re-taking his place on the stage.

The next morning, Kurt was alone in his apartment, despite his bed being full just a few hours before. He let out a frustrated sigh and looked through his New York City apartment window longingly.

"Good morning to you too." He bit his lip and got out of bed, ignoring the sinking feeling in his stomach.

"Adam." Kurt stated as precisely as possible. "I think I know what we need to talk about now."

"Go for it." Adam replied, uninterested, while he drove back to Kurt's apartment.

"What-" Kurt paused. "What... exactly... are... we?" He struggled to even get the sentence out. The other man let out a long, slow breath.

"We are friends." Adam ground out, each word followed by a small punctuating pause.

"Yeah... But. The way we- I don't know, act around each other isn't exactly friendly." He pointed out.

"It isn't?" Adam raised an eyebrow without taking his eyes off the road.

"Well, I mean... We do things friends don't do. And. I-"

"Kurt we agreed this would be casual."

Kurt breathed. "I know."

"We agreed there would be no feelings. Our agreement was simple."

"But how can you continue to just do this without any feelings at all?" He was growing more and more impatient.

"Kurt." Adam started. "I thought you understood."

"I do..." Kurt felt small. "I just- I thought maybe... I mean you could at least stay for coffee in the mornings. Friends drink coffee together."

Adam let out a low, short laugh and looked at Kurt for the first time that day. "You want me to stay the night... Afterwards?"

"I- I... Didn't think it was too much too ask." He squeaked out.

"Cuddling is not a part of the deal." Adam said, looking away from him. Kurt sighed and pressed his forehead against the window, feeling the cool glass separating him from the rain outside press against his skin. Adam's features softened. "Look... Kurt. We're still great friends. And you know you love this. So... Let's not mess with a good thing while we got it, right?"

Kurt didn't understand the wetness forming in his eyes. He nodded. "Right."

"Good. Now get out, I have a meeting to get to in an hour, so we have to be fast." Kurt got out of the car, he knew what that meant.

He just didn't know how upset it would make him.

After Adam left, Kurt felt empty. Not because Adam was gone, but because he needed someone and no one was there for him. He couldn't even tell anyone about Adam and their little arrangement, so instead he sucked it up and put a smile on his face.

See, the deal was simple. No feelings, no strings, no unnecessary talking or kissing or touching. Just sex. Easy, thoughtless sex.

Adam wasn't out to anyone in his life yet, but Kurt found out accidentally at a friend's New Year's Eve party, from the lips of one very drunk Adam, himself.
And by "from the lips of" he means literally. The lips. Had Kurt been sober he probably wouldn't have kissed back, but he allowed himself to indulge in a little alcohol, why not allow himself to indulge in a little kiss too?

Their first kiss was sweet. Nothing fancy, just warm, dry lips pressed together, muted only slightly by the bitter taste of alcohol on their breath. But unfortunately the innocence stopped there. Adam convinced Kurt he was confused and needed a friend. He needed Kurt's comfort and experience. So they went home together...

The morning after Kurt awoke to a very angry, very confused Adam.

"Morning."

"What- WHAT did I do..." The other man said, dropping his head into his palms.

"Some very interesting things, actually." Kurt suppressed his smile.

"No. I couldn't have. Not with. But you're a-"

"Yes. You did though. Hi, name's Kurt. I'm a male." Kurt looked down despite the humor in his voice.

Adam just stared at him with huge eyes. "It was a mistake."

"Oh."

"We can't tell anyone."

"I wouldn't do that to you, Adam."

"Because you're my friend. And friends do things like this with each other all the time."

"Sure." Kurt's heart sunk. "All the time."

"So doing it again, would be..."

"Completely fine. Between friends, of course."

"And no one can know."

"Naturally."

"Alright. But no unnecessary kissing." Adam said, matter-of-factly. "Or touching." He added quickly. "Or-or talking about our feelings."

"And we stay friends." Kurt sat up and clutched his forehead.

"Just friends."

Kurt was not sure why he found himself back at the coffee shop he usually met Adam in, but here he was. All of his attention on the unoccupied stage.

He could hear people around him laughing and talking amongst friends. In one corner there sat a small framed girl with her hands incased in a larger, tanned boys. They were staring at each other intently, neither one speaking, just looking. Kurt had to tear his eyes away when he realized they were probably on a date and that was not something he had the license to intrude upon.

He wasn't sure why that hurt him so much. Two teenagers had every right to be on an innocent coffee date. He just didn't know why they were allowed to be out holding hands when Kurt was denied such simple privileges. He brushed the feeling off and began to scan the room again.

"Hey guys, I'm back. Hope you missed me." A voice rang through the shop, followed by a few laughs and some conversations halting. "I'm here to play a few more songs and I hope you like'em." Kurt turned to face the stage where his eyes were met with an oddly familiar sight.

The dark-haired man from the week before sat on a stool with a guitar in his lap. Without the piano hiding most of him away, Kurt was able to look his entire body over. Looking couldn't hurt. At least Kurt hoped not, because he most definitely liked the view. The man looked... Talented. Kurt shook away any other thoughts that may have sprang up in the midst of his unabashed staring.

"I chose this song specially this past weekend, I hope you all enjoy it." He smiled and Kurt noticed who he directed his smile at. An extremely attractive female sitting in the chair closest to the stage.

Of course. An extremely attractive female. Kurt sighed. He wasn't sure why he was upset about that, he has a... An Adam. So he shouldn't even be looking at other boys. But this one was straight, so he didn't count, right? Because Kurt couldn't stop himself from staring. The man began to softly pluck his guitar strings.

"I've been... Watching your world from afar. I've been... Trying to be where you are... And I've been secretly falling apart... I'll see."

Kurt watched the man sing to the girl in the small plastic chair, looking up at him.

"To me... You're strange and you're beautiful."

Kurt's breath hitched in his throat. As he sang the next couple of words, the performer moved his smiling gaze from the girl in front of him and settled his eyes upon Kurt's.

"You'd be... So perfect with me. But you just can't see..."

The man paused his song with a small, sad smile on his face, only to resume again never taking his eyes off of Kurt's.

"You turn every head... But you don't see me."

He was stunned into silence. His brain incapable of forming words as the dark haired man continued his song. Kurt hadn't noticed he was holding his breath, but as soon as the other man's gaze left his, he exhaled shakily and slowly.

"Thank you." The man smiled warmly at everyone applauding him upon finishing his song. "I'm taking five. Please, please don't run away." Scattered laughter and the sound of chairs scraping against the floor bounced off the walls as the performer stepped off stage to greet the girl in front of him with a peck to her cheek.

It wasn't eavesdropping because he wasn't trying to listen in, right? Oh well. Either way, Kurt listened intently to try and make out the conversation between the man and woman.

"...Liked it?" He heard the man whisper.
"...Still here..." Was all he caught of her reply.
"...Scared it was too forward..."
"...Perfect..."
"...Nervous and excited but..."

Kurt was impatient, he subtly stood up and walked to the counter which was substantially closer to the table in question.

"...Anyone, Blaine. You could get anyone you wanted to fall in love with you."

Kurt turned around to face the table as the performer, Blaine smiled at her.

"Let's hope so." He cupped her face and kissed her forehead.

So were they just friends? Kurt had to stop himself from letting that phrase incite a bitter taste in his mouth. He shook his head at the thought. Blaine's eyes wandered to the counter and caught Kurt's, who pretended to suddenly be receiving a text message. Shit. He then pretended to make a hasty phone call in response to the very urgent text.

"On my way!" He squeaked out and bolted for the door.

The air outside was cold as it greeted Kurt's bare arms. It was only October, but this city had a funny way of being freezing anyway. He walked half a block before the cold began to sting his eyes and he gave in to hail a cab.

It wasn't until Kurt had made it half way to his apartment that he realized he had forgotten his coat and bag at the cafe. "I'm sorry, could you turn around... I need to go back to where you picked me up..." He told the driver. "I'm sorry." He apologized again.

"No problem." The large man said, making a U-turn at the nearest semi-legal spot he could find. "Traffic though." He grumbled.

Kurt sighed and sunk into the backseat. "I understand." Maybe with all the traffic he would be able to walk back in without having to see Blaine again. He didn't need anymore confusion in his life at the moment and every time he saw that man he couldn't help but get lost in a million different thoughts. Thoughts he didn't need or welcome.  

Upon arriving back to the small coffee shop, Kurt asked the driver to wait for him while he ran inside. As soon as he opened the door, he collided with the small girl who Blaine had been singing to earlier. "I am so-"

"Don't even worry about it." She laughed.

"I'm so absent-minded right now, I can't even begin to explain it to you. I hope you're not hurt." He laughed slightly.

"I know." She laughed loudly. "But I'm fine."

"Sorry, what?"

"I'm fine?" The girl eyed him wearily.

"No, what do you know?" Kurt crossed his arms across his chest instinctively.

"Oh. That you're absent-minded." She smiled at him, waiting for a response. When one didn't come she took his hand, shaking it. "Serena, by the way."

"Kurt." He stated plainly.

"Blaine!" She screamed as she dragged Kurt further inside by their still joined hands.

"One sec, I'm trying to find a name!" Kurt heard Blaine's voice call from the back of the small room.

Serena laughed and shouted back. "He's back."

Kurt heard the sound of something large fall and clatter to the floor, then a weak "Oh." from Blaine's general direction. "Be right out!" A few seconds later Blaine emerged from the wall he was previously hidden behind, Kurt's bag and coat in hand.

"Oh thank you so much!" Kurt ran and took the objects from the very surprised man's hands and hugged him. "I thought someone might have taken them, you know, New York and all."

The other man let out a laugh. "Yeah. Us crazy New Yorkers." A smile turned up the corners of his mouth. "I take it you're not from here?"

"Nuh uh, Ohio." Kurt said, surveying the contents of his bag skeptically. "Wait." He paused, looking up. "Us crazy New Yorkers? You are from here?"

"Born and raised."

"Fantastic! How did you get this whole, coffee shop gig thing anyways?"

"I work here. Serena let's me monopolize the open mic every now and then because she's awesome." He smiled in Serena's general direction. "She owns the place."

"Shit! The cab!" Kurt realized and began to run for the door, stopping himself only briefly to mutter, "sorry, so sorry, meter's running." And with that he opened the door to the small shop and climbed back into the cab.

"Find it?" The driver asked, not-so-subtly tapping on the meter which now read $24.88.

"Yes." Kurt sighed, "but I don't think I have enough to cover the drive back to my place..."

The door opposite Kurt's opened swiftly and a guitar case was shoved inside.

"How much?" He heard Blaine's voice enter the small space. "We'll split it."

"I've already run up almost thirty dollars without you, I can't cover that and another drive..." Kurt tried to explain.

"So you cover the thirty you have and I'll get back to your place for you." Blaine's smile made Kurt's chest tighten.

"I can't ask you to do that..."

"How far away are you?"

"Pretty far, about half an hour by cab.. I can't ask a stranger to pay that much for me. Especially not one who has already saved me once today." Kurt said hurriedly.

"Two things: If it's a half hour by cab, no way in hell I'm letting you walk, especially in the cold." He snaked his hand under the guitar case and held it for Kurt to take. "And I'm Blaine Anderson. Not a stranger."

Kurt took Blaine's hand to shake. "Kurt Hummel. And I can't let you do this."

"You'll figure out how to pay me back." Blaine smiled again and gave Kurt's hand a firm squeeze before pulling it away.

"But I-"

"Meter is still most definitely running, boys." The cab driver threw in.

"Fine." Kurt conceded. "Go." Blaine hummed triumphantly. "Thank you..." Kurt mumbled, reverting back to crossing his arms tightly over his chest.

"No problem." Blaine's smile lit up the back of the cab again.

"I really don't have a way to pay you back..." Kurt said, almost embarrassed.

"Coffee. Coffee's good." Blaine replied.

"You want me to make you coffee?" Kurt raised an eyebrow.

"I want you to take me out to coffee. Tomorrow morning."

"I-" Kurt tried to protest.

"Don't argue, this is how I want to be repaid. 8 am, tomorrow morning."

"At Rush?" Kurt suggested the shop they had just left, doing his best not to seem as hopeful as he felt.

"The one and only." Blaine met Kurt's eyes, his gaze lingering for a moment before turning away.

"Alright." He breathed. "I'll see you later."

The cab pulled up to Kurt's apartment complex and he opened the door slightly, handing Blaine the thirty dollars he promised, figuring the cab fair had almost surely doubled by this time and silently thanked Blaine again with his eyes.

"Don't worry about it." He beamed. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Kurt's face flushed, hopefully Blaine would assume it was due to the cold. "Tomorrow." Kurt affirmed. "See you then."

As the cab pulled away, Kurt couldn't help but feel a bit of hope bubbling up inside of him. It was warming, the feeling of having something to look forward to. Strange how long it had been since he was able to feel this way.

Kurt's fingers fumbled with his keys as he tried to unlock the door to his small apartment.

"Took you long enough." He heard as soon as the lock clicked back into place and he was inside.

Kurt twirled around quickly to face his occupied living room, "Adam?" He gasped, jumping slightly. "You scared me."

"Element of surprise." The other man smirked at him. "I think we should talk about something." He stood and stepped towards Kurt. "I need you tonight."

Kurt sighed. He suddenly felt lonely again. All feelings of warmth draining from his body, replaced now by cold realization. "I'm not in the mood." He tried.

"I can fix that."

"I have somewhere to be at 8 am."

"I'll be gone long before you wake up."

Kurt's eyes closed as he felt Adam wrap his arms around his middle.

"Please, Adam. I'm really not up for this right now."

"You'll be up for it in no time." Adam's lips turned up into a smirk again against Kurt's ear. "Come on." He began to lead Kurt to his small bedroom.

Wordlessly, Kurt followed and turned the lights off as they entered his bedroom, allowing only the dim light shining in from his window to fill the space.

I'll be gone long before you wake up.

Kurt's eyes fluttered open to the sunlight pouring in on his face from his open window. He glanced at his alarm clock, noting the time: 9:36.

9:36.

"Oh no..." He scrambled out of bed and darted from his room towards his bathroom.

"Morning."

Kurt froze.

"Adam?" He said, surprised as he took in the figure of the man standing in his kitchenette, sipping coffee from one of Kurt's two mugs. Oh he was just full of surprises lately.

"Were you expecting someone else?"

"N-no. I just. You said-"

"I know. But you said you wanted me here for coffee afterwards... So..."

"But my alarm-"

"Yeah, it went off at some ungodly time, but you looked completely worn out, so I just shut it off."

"Adam!" Kurt shrieked. "I am so late! I told you I had somewhere to be at 8!"

"Sorry!" Adam's hands shot up in defense. "I thought this is what you wanted!"

"No!" Kurt's tone was more harsh than he had intended. "I-I mean, yes..." He let out a calming breath. "Adam. Any other morning I would have loved to see you in my kitchen in the morning but-" He stopped himself. "I'm late." He finished simply.

"Hint taken." Adam said, setting the now empty mug into the sink and picking up his jacket. "Thought you'd like my surprise. Guess not. Bye Kurt." And with that, he left, slamming the door behind him.

Kurt winced at the sound. "Good morning to you too." He reiterated the mantra he had become so familiar with.

The coffee maker clock indicated that he was now nearly two hours late for his meeting with Blaine. Kurt dressed quickly and tried to forget the scene of the morning's events that kept replaying in his mind. Honestly, if Adam had done that any other morning... It wasn't fair that he was just now showing any kind of interest in something more. It wasn't fair that Kurt had probably just killed any progression that this could have led to. Submerged in his thoughts, Kurt didn't arrive at the cafe until well after 10:30.

"Serena!" He called when he saw the small blonde girl behind the counter.

"Oh. You." She greeted him sourly. "Yes?"

"Did Blaine leave?"

"Over an hour ago." Her tone was bitter.

"Dammit." He said, much louder than he meant to.

"Where were you? He was so excited... He got here at seven this morning."

Kurt internally slapped himself. "Seven?"

"Oh come on, it was more like 7:15" Kurt heard a voice behind him.

"Blaine!" Kurt turned on his heel. "I'm so sorry my alarm got turned off I didn't even wake up until-"

"Standing me up for coffee, leaving me with the cab fair. I'm starting to think you owe me more than just some morning java." Blaine smirked and raised an eyebrow.

"Oh?" Kurt breathed, playing along as best as he could while trying to hide his relief.   

"Dinner!" Serena chimed in.

"What?" Blaine eyed her uncertainly.

"Yes! Dinner. Friday night!" She smiled at them both.

"I-" Kurt tried to start.

"Please," Serena whined. "He's always here! I love him dearly, but he never leaves. He needs a friend, Kurt. Please."

"Serena!" Blaine exhaled sharply. "Unhelpful."

"Sorry, Blainers. But you do need a friend." The two shared a look that held some meaning Kurt was not clued in on before Serena turned her eyes back to Kurt. "So it's settled. You're taking Blaine out to dinner on Friday. No complaints."

"Serena..." Blaine began.

"From either of you!" She stated forcefully.

Kurt could tell Blaine was reluctant. He also caught that whole, Serena loves him thing. The question of Blaine's sexuality was reopened in Kurt's mind and he mentally groaned at the thought. Snapping himself out of his own musings, Kurt allowed himself to look Blaine over, taking in his pouted lips and flushed cheeks. With a small sigh, Kurt realized he needed a friend just as much as Blaine seemed to. "I'm a pretty good friend, Blaine. I promise I won't like, make you shop with me or anything. We can even watch basketball or something if you wanted."

"The season hasn't started yet?" Blaine's lips immediately turned up into a smile.

"The what?" Kurt replied, confused.

"Nothing." Blaine laughed. "Okay. Dinner. Friday. Give me your phone."

"My phone?"

"I'm not letting you stand me up again, bro."

Kurt scoffed. "I wouldn't dream of it, bro." He threw in with exaggerated emphasis and handed Blaine his phone. He input his number and pressed the call button.

The sound of the Indiana Jones theme song filled the space around them. Blaine blushed.

"Thought that was on silent." He mumbled as he rejected the incoming call. "There." He cleared his throat, turning his tone more serious. "Now I have your number and can call you mercilessly if you ever try to leave me hanging again."

Kurt laughed. "Deal."

"Great, it's settled. Now. Blaine, your shift is at 11. Get on it." Serena smiled at the two boys.

"On it!" He smirked, his eyes trained on Kurt's. "But first, someone owes me some coffee. Medium drip." Blaine thought for a moment. "Large." He added, a smile playing on his lips again.

Kurt took out his wallet and ordered both of their drinks, smiling at Blaine and handing Serena his credit card. "As adorable as this is," Serena swiped Kurt's card and handed it back to him. "You still have work in 5 minutes and you haven't even changed. Kurt, your coffee is going to have to be togo, because Blaine does not need any distractions from his work today."

"That's alright." Kurt smiled again at the tan, now blushing, man in front of him.

Blushing.

Oh.

Blushing.

"Bye, Kurt." Blaine said, his ears burning red as he glared at Serena.

"G'bye Blaine." Kurt smiled and took his coffee once it was offered to him as Blaine rushed into the back of the cafe.