The idea ran through Blaines head constantly. It was maddening. He was starting to have trouble sleeping at night. He hardly seemed to have an appetite either. 

What was he supposed to do? 

Break up with Rachel? Tell her the truth? Set her free, so she could find someone that could love her unconditionally. It would have been the right thing to do, even if it hurt her in the process. Shed eventually get over it. She would find someone, and forget that Blaine had ever hurt her. Shed leave him behind, probably hating him in the process, and hed be free to love unconditionally.

But the thought of ruining everything. Everything came back to the plan. What would he do without Rachel? If he told his parents he was gay, theyd probably disown him. Then where would he be? They wouldnt pay for his share of the apartment anymore, Hed be so far behind on school bills, and hed send his future into the toilet. Blaine owed his parents so much. They had agreed to help him financially, as long as he stuck to the plan. But where would he be without that financial support? Hed be out on the street.

Hed be unhappy, but could he stay with Rachel just to receive the financial support from his parents? Was he a bad person for staying with her for his own good?

He had battled the idea for so long, but that following Sunday night, he thought he had made up his mind.

Rachel was lying next to him in bed. Her arms wrapped around his waist, She gently drew her finger around his stomach, breathing slowly. "Blaine?" she whispered.

"Yes?" 

"I really love you," she said, her voice shaking.

"I know," Blaine kissed the top of her head. 

"Will you make love to me?" she asked softly. Her hand froze and she squinted at him through the darkness. "I just... I really want to be close to you right now." She shuddered next to him, clinging to his waist. Blaine was sure he felt a tear fall from her cheek to his cool skin.

"Whats wrong?" Blaine said, pulling her tighter. Blaine cupped her face with his hand and glanced at her through the dim light from outside. Tears streamed down her cheeks and Blaine felt so helpless.

"Nothing," she said, gently pressing her lips to his. "I just want to be close to you."

Blaine brushed her hair behind her ear and held her tightly. "Im right here. Im always going to be right here."

"Howd things go with Rachel?" Kurt asked the following morning. He seemed surprised to see Blaine in the coffee shop. He should have been surprised, because Blaine didnt want anything to do with Kurt until he had come clean. It was obvious that coming out wasnt going to be that simple for Blaine. He already held it off for so long.

"Not like i planned," Blaine mumbled. 

"See? Life never goes according to plan," Kurt nodded. "You didnt tell her?"

"How could I, Kurt? Shes been so weird since she found out she got the role of Fanny. its like shes been extra clingy, and it makes it that much harder to tell her. I dont want to ruin this for her," Blaine ran a hand through his hair. "I don t know what to do."

"Would you tell her if she hadnt gotten the part?" Kurt raised an eyebrow. "I mean, then she would have been devastated, and itd be even harder to say anything. At least she has Fanny now."

He shrugged, "Youre right, shed probably be too upset. I wouldnt want to give her anther reason to cry."

"What if she didnt audition at all, and she had nothing to be emotional about?" Kurt questioned. 

"I dont know," Blaine said bitterly. "Why does it even matter to you? Its my problem, not yours."

At this, Kurt folded his hands on the table and stared into Blaines eyes, "I think you better add this to your list of things you know about me... Im a very passionate person. I know what I want, and I know whats important to me. I care about the people Im close to, and I would do anything to help them."

"Noted," Blaine nodded.

"That includes you and Rachel. I havent  known you that long, but I do care about you, Blaine, and I care about what happens to you. Youve obviously been dealing with this for a long time, and its only going to break you the longer you keep it to yourself... I dont want to see Rachel get hurt, but I think it would be best for both of you to tell her the truth."

"i know youre right. Its just that Ive always been that person who knows exactly where theyre going, and I like it that way. I dont like having an uncertain future," he glanced down at the cup in his hands.

"Take it from someone who didnt get into the college he wanted," Kurt said quietly. "I had no idea what to do with my life. I spent the last few years resenting myself because I didnt have a backup plan. i know how that feels, Blaine." He reached across the table and grabbed Blaines hand, causing him to loop up. "But look where its gotten me. Im here in New York. I have a wonderful boyfriend. I have you to drink coffee with every morning. I have Rachel. I also have an interview at Vogue.com next week. Did I tell you that/?"

"No, you didnt, but thats so exciting," he gave Kurt a small smile.

"The way I see it: If I had gone to NYADA, I could have missed my chance at Vogue  Its something Ive always wanted to do. I used to feel that way about Broadway, but after losing out on NYADA, I dont think it was my destiny. Vogue could be that destiny, and I could have missed that window by following that sure plan of being on Broadway."

"And if my destiny is to find Prince Charming and possibly lose out on being a doctor, because I cant financially support myself, then I need to accept that?" Blaine looked at him with an uncomfortable expression.

"Well work something out, I promise," Kurt gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"Dylan wont mind?" Blaine questioned.

"I know it seems weird that Im so concerned with your relationship, but Ive been in the closet. I know it feels, so I want to help you. Im sure hed understand that," Kurt rose from his seat and tossed the remainder of his coffee in the trash. "Let me know how it goes with Rachel. You can do this. I believe in you."

Making dinner later than evening, Blaine stood in the kitchen, humming a tune to a Katy Perry song. He busied himself, trying to keep his mind off of what he was about to do.

Kurt had been right. It was better to end this now, regardless of what Rachel was dealing with. She had Fanny. It wasnt like she was losing everything around her. This would be better for them in the end. He had to keep reminding himself of that, or he might back out of telling her completely.

When the front door opened, Blaine called out, "hey, babe, Im in the kitchen."

"Hi," Rachel said quietly, standing near the front door. She leaned against it, letting out a heavy sigh. Making a sour face, she  crossed her arms over her chest. 

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked, noticing how pale she looked. 

She stood there staring at him for a long moment, and then, slowly, she shook her head. A sob escaped her throat and she buried her face in her hands. 

This was unexpected. 

Blaine dropped the pan he was holding and rushed over to her. "Whats wrong?"Blaine rubbed her arms soothingly. 

"It wasnt supposed to end like this," she said, sobbing into her hands. "I had been afraid of this for a couple weeks now, but I didnt want to say anything, because I wasnt sure what to do."

"What?" his heart felt like it was in his throat. She couldnt possibly know that he had planned to break up with her. She didnt know about him kissing Kurt, unless Kurt told her. But he wouldnt do that. He had been pushing Blaine to tell Rachel himself.

"We had it all planned out. I would be on Broadway, and you would be a doctor, and then wed get married and have kids and wed live happily ever after, and now its all been thrown out the window," she cried even harder. her body began to tremble. She swayed on the spot and Blaine pulled her close to his chest, rubbing her back gently.

"Did they fire you?" he asked nervously. This would really put  a cramp in their situation,  if Rachel had been fired before her first Broadway show even hit the stage. She would be devastated. She certainly would need a shoulder to lean on, and Blaine would feel obligated to be that refuge for her.

"We had a costume fitting today, and thats when I knew I had to tell you," she cried harder, clinging to his shirt. 

"Wait,  i thought you had a costume fitting last week," Blaine said, puzzled. it seemed silly to worry about, but in Rachels current state, with her job on the line, he had to know what went wrong for her to act like this.

"I lied," she whispered, sniffing. her sobs began to subside, and she let out a small hiccup.

"You lied," Blaine grabbed her hands and pulled them away from her tear-stained face. "What did you lie about?"

"The costume fitting wasnt last week... It was this week. i wasnt at the theater when you asked the other day. i should have told you and I didnt, and Im so sorry," she broke into tears again, burying her face in her hands once more.  

Blaine didnt know what to do. Had she cheated on him? Was Rachel with someone else, when she had told him she was at the theater? Was Rachel breaking up with him? Would he not have to do this at all? If so, how was he going to feel about that?

"Rachel, tell me whats going on," he said firmly.

Taking a deep breath, she let out another hiccup. Tucking her hair behind her ears, she looked at him and said, "You have to know that I wanted to tell you sooner. Every time I tried, I got scared."

"Scared of what?" he said, feeling his temper rise slightly. Why wasnt she coming out and telling him the truth?

"I went to the doctor, when I told you I was at the theater," she said, taking a deep breath. "I couldnt bare to tell you where I had been, because itd freak you out."

"Why did you go to the doctor?" Blaine asked. His anger ebbed slightly. If this was something serious, hed feel guilty about snapping at her. He softened his expression and grabbed her hand, leading her over to the couch.

"i was late," she said softly, staring at her knees.

"For your appointment?" he asked.

"No," the corners of her mouth twitched. Taking a deep breath, she said, ‘I was late for my period, Blaine... I had taken an at home pregnancy test the week I found out about Fanny. Thats why I was so emotional all week, because I already had guessed."

"Youre not - " his words caught in his throat. 

"And then last week, I went to the doctor. I hadnt been feeling well, but because I had already suspected, I tried to hide it from you, and you didnt even seem to notice," she rambled.

"Youre not - "

"And when I had the costume fitting today, I realized I wouldnt be able to fit in the costume for long," she continued

"Youre not - " he stared at her with wide eyes..

"Im pregnant," she breathed.

"Youre not - " he tried again.

"I was supposed to have Fanny, and you were supposed to finish medical school first, and now its too late," she cupped her hand over her mouth, letting out another sob.

Pulling her into a hug, Blaine clung to Rachel tightly. She buried her face in his shoulder and cried. He gently rocked her, whispering to her that it would be okay.

But Blaine knew it wasnt okay. Rachel was right, it was over. Shed never have Fanny now. They would struggle to make ends meet with Blaines schooling. And now, there was no chance of letting Rachel find someone that could truly make her happy, because she would always have her child with Blaine. He couldnt back out of this relationship now.

Kurt was right about one thing: Life never goes the way you plan.