Blaine was actually looking forward to Sex Ed class. Kurt wasn’t, but that wasn’t shocking. It wasn’t that Kurt didn’t enjoy sex – no, they both enjoyed it quite well – he was just a very private person and didn’t want to discuss it front of a room full of their peers just waiting to mock them about it.

Unfortunately, they’d both been at Dalton last year when most of their classmates had taken it, so they didn’t even have the option of sitting with friends to keep them from the prying eyes of others. Kurt pointed out a table in the back and Blaine followed him so they could get them before anyone else did. They unpacked their stuff, getting settled as everyone else made their way into the room.

“All right, settle down!” The teacher called, making his way into the room. Blaine caught sight of a tall, dark haired man. His familiar blue eyes locked on Blaine’s as the man made his way to the front of the room.

Blaine swallowed hard as the teacher turned around.

“Good afternoon,” he said, putting his satchel down on the teacher’s desk. “I’m Mr. Anderson.”

The class let out a few chuckles.

“Okay, hands up. Who wants to make a Matrix joke right now?” Mr. Anderson asked. A few hands rose. “Which is why you can call me Coop or Cooper.” Cooper perched on the edge of the desk. “We’re here today to talk about a serious subject – sex.”

A couple of the jocks made “wooo” noises. Cooper smiled. Blaine wanted to somehow meld with the chair and become invisible.

“Blaine,” Kurt hissed.

“What?” Blaine whispered.

“Why is your brother teaching Sex Ed?”

Blaine shrugged. “I have no idea.”

“I know, I know, sex is exciting, right?” Cooper smiled exaggeratedly at the class as Blaine turned to look back at the front of the classroom. “It’s also terrifying, and if done wrong, can lead to bad things.”

The class got quiet for a second as Cooper kept talking. “The purpose of this class is not to tell you not to have sex. It’s not to tell to go out and have sex. The purpose is for you to be informed in case you end up in a situation where you have sex. Whether it’s with a long time partner or some ‘hottie’ you met at a party.” More laughter.

“Sex is a lot more fun when you’re prepared,” Cooper said. “So let’s start there.”

Blaine had to hand it to his brother – the man was good.

*

Kurt spent most of Cooper’s lecture wishing he was anywhere else. The entire discussion of condoms, birth control and lube made him want to run for the hills. He knew this stuff already – first hand. Kurt didn’t want to learn it from a teacher, much less one who was related to his boyfriend, especially the boyfriend who he occasionally had sex with. He knew Cooper had to have noticed they were in the class, but luckily he hadn’t said anything.

“Now that we’ve talked about being prepared, let’s talk about the different kinds of sex you can have.” Cooper said. “Who wants to volunteer an answer?” The sound of a pin dropping would have been as loud as bomb at that moment. “Don’t be shy. If you guys are old enough to have sex, you’re old enough to have a mature discussion about it.”

It took a few minutes, but eventually one girl in the front raised her hand. Slowly a couple of other hands go up. Soon, Cooper had written several kinds of sex on the board, but there was still one missing.

He wondered if Cooper would bring it up or not.

“There’s still one more,” Cooper said, looking around at the class. “Anyone?” Blaine’s hand went up.

“Oh, my God,” Kurt muttered. He was never going to make it through this class.

“You, in the back with the bow tie,” Cooper said. Kurt hid his face behind his hand. He officially did not know his boyfriend. All the eyes in the room were on them.

“Anal sex,” Blaine said, his voice ringing out loudly. The room was filled with snickers at his words. Cooper turned and wrote it on the board.

“No offense,” one of the jocks said, “But why do we need to learn about that? Only gay people do it.”

Kurt’s eyes burned and he couldn’t look up. Not when this was the subject matter at hand. Not something this private.

“Heterosexual couples have and enjoy anal sex as well,” Cooper answer. “How you have sex isn’t what determines your orientation.”

The room was silent for a moment and then Cooper launched into a discussion about the different kinds of sex and the risks involved.

“The key thing to remember is preparation,” Cooper grinned. “You guys will enjoy sex a lot more if you’re prepared.” He reached into his bag and pulled out a banana and a condom. “One last thing before we’re done for the day – we’re all going to practice how to put a condom on.”

Cooper passed out the supplies, walking around the room and dropping one of each off at each table. He left a banana and a condom on the table in front of Kurt and Blaine and murmured with a wink, “I think you two probably know this already,” before turning and walking away.

“I’m going to kill him,” Blaine muttered, his face turning red.

“I’ll help you bury the body,” Kurt agreed. Blaine looked down with a sigh. Kurt watched as Blaine tore open the condom and put it correctly on the banana, trying not to think of last week, when those fingers had put a condom on him.

Cooper walked around, offering suggestions. Blaine waved their perfectly sheathed banana in his direction and Cooper just smirked before moving on to help another student.

“Now that you’ve all gotten the hang of it, we’re done for the day. Everyone take a condom on the way out.” Cooper dismissed them.

“I am so glad that’s over,” Kurt muttered as they gathered their things and headed for the door. Cooper was standing just inside the doorway, handing on the condoms.

“Little brother,” he said to Blaine, handing them both a condom. “Use them well.”

“We will,” Blaine replied, grinning.

“Oh, my God,” Kurt moaned. “We’re going. Bye Cooper.” He tugged on Blaine’s sleeve and led his boyfriend into the hallway, the sound of Cooper’s laughter trailing after them.