One-Shot
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DSL

Finn is throwing a party for everyone at the Hudson-Hummel residence. Blaine promises Kurt that he can drink but remain a gentleman. Third time's the charm? Or maybe not? One-shot, funny, smutty, not angsty.


E - Words: 2,306 - Last Updated: Jun 12, 2012
1,511 0 2 5
Categories: General, Humor, PWP,
Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, Noah Puckerman,
Tags: established relationship,

 

Kurt opened the oven door to peek at the nachos toasting under the broiler, then shut it again quickly. He moved to the microwave and put a bag of popcorn inside, setting the timer and pressing start. He wiped his hands on a dish towel, surveying the rest of the party snacks, sodas, cups, and ice, his eyes lingering on the two glass bottles Puck had contributed.
Blaine came up behind him and slipped his arms around Kurt's waist, noticing the look. "I promise I can behave myself this time. It won't be like last time." "Sweetie, I told you, I'm not worried. It's not like it can get much worse than the last time... or the time before that, when you made out with Rachel." Blaine dipped his head briefly in embarrassment. "You won't ever let that go, will you?" he grinned. Kurt twisted around in his arms and smirked. "Well, you are contaminated now. I'm not sure why I still let you kiss me." Kurt moved his hands to Blaine's neck and proceeded to contradict himself.
"Get a room, you two!"
"Finn, I already have a room here seeing as its my house too, but it's a little early for Blaine and I to give up on the party, don't you think? Besides, who will keep you all supplied with snacks?" Kurt winked at his stepbrother and pulled out of Blaine's grasp to retrieve the nachos from the oven and arrange them on a platter.

Two hours later, the nachos are gone and the party is in full swing. And so is Blaine, Kurt notes. The assorted New Directions are sprawled on the couches and floor, enjoying the libations and occasionally singing along to musicals playing on the television.

Dance: Ten, Looks: Three,
And I'm still on unemployment.
Dancing for my own enjoyment.
That ain't it kid, that ain't it kid!


Rachel collapsed into Blaine's lap in a fit of giggles after the two belt out the lines together. Kurt tries not to roll his eyes at the spectacle.
"I'm sorry Kurt, I know your boyfriend doesn't like Tits and Ass. I can't help it, he makes such a good singing partner!"
"It's okay, Rachel. But get out of his lap." Kurt flounced over, smiling and offering a hand to the petite brunette and pulling her up before taking her place. Kurt snuggled into his boyfriend's arms, wrinkling his nose slightly at the sharp alcohol smell. "Are you having a good time? Did you like my canapes?"
"Of course, everybody’s having a good time," Blaine replied. "You're the host with the most, DSL."
"...What did you call me?"
Blaine's eyes are glassy and his smile is naughty. "DSL. It's your new nickname."
"What in the world does that mean?" Kurt asked, glancing around the room at his friends. Puck had been watching the exchange intently and suddenly chokes on his drink with laughter.
Rachel whipped out her phone. "I'll look it up on Urban Dictionary!"
"No, please don't!" Blaine shouted, holding out a desperate hand and cracking up.
"Blaine, could I see you in the kitchen for a moment? I need your help with the rest of the canapes." Kurt snapped. Blaine knocked back the rest of his drink and complied. As the two rose to walk into the kitchen, Puck made eye contact with Blaine and raised an eyebrow. "Busted!"

In the kitchen, Blaine poured himself a refill under Kurt's stern gaze.
"Blaine, I'm guessing by Puck's reaction that was some kind of dirty joke at my expense? You're certainly doing better than last time but please remember we are in mixed company. Now, do you mind telling me what DSL means?"
"Dick-sucking lips. Did anyone ever tell you that you have them? Awesome ones." Blaine was clearly unfazed by the mini-lecture. He crossed the distance between them, grabbed Kurt's ass and pressed him against the counter for a deep, hungry kiss.
Kurt struggled to maintain his train of thought under the thrilling assault. He's supposed to be annoyed, and what must his friends be saying back in the living room? Kurt shuddered as Blaine's lips moved to his neck. On the other hand...
"Why do you say that?" Kurt subconsciously licked his lips.
"Well," Blaine replied, pulling back and tracing Kurt's lips with a finger. "They are thick, soft, pink and a little puffy. Perfect for wrapping around a dick."
Kurt blushed and glanced at the floor. "Just any dick, or did you have one in mind?"
"Well, I could make a suggestion. Maybe we could sneak off to your room and I could explain myself better?"
Kurt considered casually strolling out of the kitchen, past the group in the living room and into his bedroom. Surely they have all googled "DSL" by now. That won't do at all. Kurt impulsively snatched up Blaine's drink and took a large gulp before setting it down on the counter. "Come on, Warbler." He grabbed Blaine by the wrist and pulled him towards the back of the kitchen, opening the utility closet and shoving him inside. Kurt follows and shuts the door, pushing Blaine back by his shoulders until he stumbled into rolls of paper towels and bottles of cleaning supplies.

The closet has a light but Kurt didn't turn it on. After his eyes adjust, the thin strip of light coming from under the door provides just enough illumination so that he can make out the curve of Blaine's cheekbones in the dark, and his eyes shining in excitement.
Kurt began to feel the alcohol as a warm tingle spreading from his chest down to his fingertips and back, finally coming to rest in his groin. He answered the feeling by grabbing onto Blaine, with one hand digging into his hip and the other at the back of his head, pressing their lips together into a hard and needy kiss. Kurt moves onto Blaine's neck, sucking and nibbling, and shoving his hand up the back of Blaine's shirt, tracing along his spine. Blaine blinks in drunken bewilderment. He can barely process how he got from chugging his drink in the kitchen to being pleasured in a closet while tripping over Windex.
"K..kurt? Mmph. What's gotten into you?"
Kurt peeled himself off of Blaine only long enough to say "Hush, I'm busy." Wrapping one hand around the shorter boy's waist (and admiring for a moment the feeling of Blaine's muscled back under his fingers), he moved his other hand to Blaine's crotch and started to rub his growing erection through the denim.
Blaine's eyes rolled back in his head at the rough contact. Hushing sounds like a solid plan right about now. Why was he resisting, again? Between the darkness, the alcohol and the amazing things Kurt was doing, he's having a hard time telling up from down. Blaine started to moan softly.
Kurt pulled away and searched for Blaine's golden eyes in the darkness of the closet. "Can I leave a mark?" Kurt's voice is breathy and desperate. Blaine has always resisted that request in the past, but right now he can't remember why. Something to do with staying dapper. Who cares? "Mmmm... whatever you want, Kurt."
Kurt freed both hands and pushed Blaine's head to one side while pulling his shirt collar down, exposing a delicious expanse of Blaine's lightly tanned neck. Kurt nuzzled until he found the perfect spot, then bit down. Not enough to really hurt, but enough to hurt in a good way. He starts to suck hard to leave his mark. Blaine, interestingly enough, seemed to be loving it, gripping Kurt's shoulders and whimpering in rhythm to the suction. Kurt finds the sound incredibly erotic, especially considering that he's usually the one doing the whimpering, not the one inducing it. Blaine bucked his hips against Kurt's groin, punctuating his whimpers with desperation. Kurt gave one final nip and moved off of Blaine's neck, eliciting a gasp.

Kurt knelt down, placed his hands firmly on Blaine's hips, and looked up hungrily. "I should tease you more often," Blaine remarked, swaying ever so slightly in the dark. Kurt snorted, trailing his fingertips along Blaine's waistband, then untucked his shirttails and skimmed fingertips over Blaine's stomach. "I wouldn't want to encourage you to embarrass me in public any more, but I can't argue with your logic" he said, pressing a few more kisses along Blaine's collarbone.
After a quick glance at the floor, which may or may not contain spilled cleaning products and dust, Kurt got down on his knees. He moved to undo and shove down Blaine's jeans, pulling out his rapidly hardening member. His breath hitched in his throat as he laid eyes on Blaine's cock.
Kurt wet his lips and stroked Blaine in his fist, watching his boyfriend's face for a response. Blaine moaned at the contact, bringing a smile to Kurt's face. Despite his protests, this adventure in the closet with all of their friends in the next room has brought out an exhibitionistic streak Kurt didn't know he had. It might just be perfect to make Blaine moan loudly enough so that everyone knows exactly what they snuck off to do.
Kurt pursed his lips into a soft ring and slid his mouth onto the head of Blaine's cock, stopping just before the ridge and sucking gently. His eyes flashed back to Blaine's face, making sure that the suction is having the desired effect before proceeding. Kurt advanced at a torturous pace, until his mouth was full. He curled his tongue and lashed it against the underside, aiming for the most sensitive spot. Blaine rewarded Kurt's efforts by keening loudly, knees buckling and grasping the shelves for support. A shower kitchen sponges hit Kurt on the head. "I love you, but watch the hair!" Kurt snarked, before taking Blaine's erection back into his mouth, secretly pleased at how much noise his boyfriend was making.

Kurt was bobbing enthusiastically on Blaine's cock when they were alerted to the sounds of someone entering the kitchen. Blaine put his hand on the back of Kurt's head to still his motion, and both boys hold their breath to listen.
"Where did Kurt go? He said there were more snacks. Finn's getting a little unruly out there, I think he might actually eat Rachel's face this time."
"I dunno, bro, he looked pretty pissed at Warbler for that sex joke. What kind of beer did you want?"
"Ummm, Heineken, I guess. I didn't get the joke. After I saw that video with the girls and the cup I don't like to google things like that when I don't know what I'm getting myself into."
"DSL means 'dick-sucking lips.' It's usually used to describe a girl but there's no reason a guy can't have them... a big, pretty mouth..." *step* "soft, pink lips..." *step* "that would look great on a cock..."
The boys in the closet heard the soft thud of the refrigerator door closing, followed by the softer sound of two bodies pressing up against it. "Mmmmph."
"Puck, you're full of surprises tonight... um... how much have you had to drink?"
"Just enough, blondie." *smooch*
Kurt tensed up as stumbling footsteps approached the closet and a hand fumbled for the knob. "Wait, what if someone comes in? Let's go to my car instead." "Okay." Kurt's heart thudded in his chest. Yeah, he definitely had a thing for almost getting caught in compromising positions.
Blaine relaxed and breathed deeply again in response to the sound of retreating footsteps and the kitchen door closing. "That was a close one, maybe we should go rejoin the party?" "But I'm not done with you yet!" Kurt pouted.

Kurt knelt back down and dove onto Blaine's cock, gulping quickly until it hit the very back of his throat.
Blaine moaned at full volume, unable to contain himself. Kurt wondered if anyone heard. That thought in turn drove him further into a frenzy, and he tried to take Blaine's cock further, swallowing and pressing forward until his nose was buried in Blaine's pubic hair. Unable to resist any longer, Kurt undid his own pants and fisted himself frantically.
Blaine moaned again, and Kurt joined in, though muffled by the fullness pressing into his throat. He took Blaine a little too far and started to gag. That feeling in turn drove Blaine past the point of reason, and he grabbed the back of Kurt's head, holding him in place with fingers curled in his hair. Kurt made a noise which Blaine interpreted as discomfort, and he quickly let go.
Kurt made another noise, this time of protest, grabbing Blaine's hand and placing it back on his head. Blaine's eyes widened, but he complied, bringing up his other hand to the back of Kurt's head as well. He gave an experimental thrust into Kurt's throat. Kurt struggled at the sensations, tears coming to his eyes, but enjoyed it all the same. He stroked himself faster. Blaine thrust a few more times, still trying to be gentle with Kurt
But it was becoming far too difficult to hold back. Several faster, more forceful thrusts later, and Blaine was at his limit. He squeezed his eyes shut in the dark, coming so hard he saw stars. The feeling of Blaine's cock spurting in his mouth pushed Kurt over the edge as well, coming all over Blaine's tanned thighs.

Kurt got up off of the floor, wiping his mouth with a coy smile and brushing off his clothes. "I think you've been punished enough. That should teach you a lesson about what happens when you make sex jokes about me in front of the whole glee club."
Blaine blinked and panted. "I... lesson? Huh?" He tried again to focus his thoughts. "I think I understand now, yes. Though these stains are going to be a little hard to explain."
"As is my hair. I have to find a mirror."
Blaine grinned. "Nah, you're cute when you get a little messy."
"Me, messy? I'm not the one covered in come. The paper towels are right behind you." Kurt spun on his heel and strutted out the door, shutting the closet behind him.

End Notes: I would really appreciate a review, even a short one! Even if you hated it! But I hope you didn't hate it. ;)

Comments

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Oh my god, I loved this! It was so hot, and I love Drunk!Blaine xD Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm guessing that 'Blondie' is Sam?

Good guess! I'm glad you enjoyed it.