After Kurt and Blaine got back together, things were complicated, but undeniably great. Blaine felt...whole again. Knowing that Kurt forgave him was one of the best feelings he'd ever experienced, ranked only under their first time and their first ‘I love you' and their first kiss.

It was the first day of summer break and Kurt had gotten a few days off to pick up Blaine and drive back to New York with Finn and Rachel in tow. His plane hadn't come in until around midnight and he insisted that Blaine just wait until the morning to see him instead of picking him up at the airport, saying that even his dad wouldn't be there, just Finn and Puck.

Of course, Blaine hadn't slept a wink and had smiled at Kurt's text saying he'd made it home and would see him soon. At around seven in the morning, he couldn't take it anymore and decided to drive to the Hummel-Hudson's and see him.

He arrived as Carole was leaving for her shift, grinning at her small shriek of delight and her tight hug.

"It's so good to see you, honey! Burt's already at the shop and the boys are all asleep, but you can go in and see Kurt if you want," she said with a wink. "Puck and Finn are taking Sam back to Kentucky to see his parents later, so I don't even know how late they all stayed up."

Blaine thanked her and went inside, trying not to think about how they hadn't asked him to stay up with them. He knew that the four of them had a different bond than he and Sam did, but it still caused an unpleasant swoop in his stomach.

That quickly dissipated as he approached the door to the basement and his boyfriend's bedroom, and he began to grin at the prospect of seeing Kurt again. He planned to jump on his bed and wake him up with kisses to his forehead and chin the way he used to, but that plan was soon derailed after he walked down the stairs to see Kurt sleeping soundly, his hair in disarray against his pillow.

Along with a Sam, sleeping with his arm thrown across Kurt's middle and his head on Kurt's chest.

It wasn't quite the same as the way Blaine and Kurt slept, all tangled together as though they couldn't stand to have any part of them not touching if they could help it, but it still felt like a punch in the stomach.

Kurt was under his blankets, but Blaine could tell that he at least didn't have a shirt on. Sam was shirtless as well and wore a pair of shorts that were sitting crookedly on his hips, as though thrown on haphazardly.

Blaine slowly backed away, gently walking up the stairs and closing the door behind him numbly. He made it to the living room before his breathing started to falter and tears burned his eyes.

How stupid was he, to think that Kurt would be able to get back with him without making the score even? And really, Sam had always been on Kurt's side, hadn't he? He'd always thought it was because they were like brothers, but perhaps he'd been wrong all along.

He tried watching television, staring blankly at Kelly Ripa and then trying to pay attention to The Today Show, but he eventually just turned it off and laid down on the couch, his eyes burning and head pounding.

By the time he heard the distinctive patter of Kurt's soft footsteps coming up the stairs almost two hours later, he'd dried his tears and pretended to read one of Carole's ‘Better Homes & Gardens'.

"Blaine!" Kurt cried when he peeked into the living room. "When did you get here?"

He ran to Blaine and pulled him into a tight hug, both of them nearly falling over from the force of it. Blaine didn't answer right away, too absorbed in the warmth of Kurt's body to think about anything except the strength of his arms around him.

When they pulled apart, both of them with wet eyes and broad grins, Blaine answered. "I got here at like nine," he said.

"So you've just been waiting around for two hours?"

Blaine smiled stiffly and nodded. "It was no big deal, honestly. I called Cooper, watched a little bit of Kelly and Michael, I was totally occupied."

Kurt just smiled and pulled him close again, pressing a kiss behind Blaine's ear. The smaller boy melted into his touch, trying to forget about his boyfriend and his best friend sleeping half-naked together in bed.

--

Blaine didn't bring it up. After the others had departed for Kentucky, leaving Kurt and Blaine behind on their own, they were far too occupied with each other for Blaine to even consider talking about it. It was always there, though, in the back of his mind, nagging at him, telling him he wasn't good enough; reminding him of the pain he caused Kurt.

A few days later, after packing and arguing with Santana to just come with them (she refused to drive that long in such a packed car), they left with Rachel and Finn, who had managed to snag a spot at NYU and was going to study history with the hope of teaching it one day.

They were halfway to New York when Sam called Blaine.

"Hey, man! How's the trip?"

"It's going pretty well, actually. Finn and Rachel won't stop bickering, but Kurt and I are entertaining ourselves just fine," he said with a smile at Kurt in the driver's seat, who smiled wryly back, clearly exhausted.

"Ask him how Kentucky is!" yelled Rachel from the back.

"Rachel wants-,"

"I heard her," Sam said with a chuckle. "Kentucky's fine. I like seeing Stevie and Stacy all the time, and my parents are around more since my dad got that promotion last month, but I still feel kind of guilty just hanging around all day."

"Relax, Sam, you just graduated. Give yourself a break."

"The tire shop's always there until he leaves for California," Finn called from the back seat. Mercedes had helped Sam find good music schools in L.A., all of which had wanted him for guitar. At the end of the summer, he would be leaving with her and Puck to live in the apartment they were going to share. Sam and Mercedes were still just friends, but Blaine wondered how long that would last.

He also worried about how long Puck would stay out there. He was giving California another chance now that Jake seemed to be doing better and after Burt had given him a long talk about how it wasn't Puck's responsibility to give up his youth because of his father's neglect.

"Yeah, I know," Sam said, pulling Blaine from his thoughts. "Hey, can I talk to Kurt for a second?"

Something hot stirred in Blaine's chest, and he wanted to say no because Kurt was driving, but they were pulling into a rest stop at the moment. And really, who was he to dictate if they talked or not? He didn't have that right at all; especially not after what he'd done.

"Yeah, sure, hold on; we're just pulling into a rest area."

Kurt took the phone from him with a smile after he parked, and Blaine stepped out of the car to stretch with Finn and Rachel. Kurt's laughter drifted out of his open door and Blaine squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop those thoughts from coming to him.

"Hey, are you okay?" asked Finn, who appeared out of nowhere next to him.

Blaine quickly composed himself and smiled up at the taller boy. "I'm fine. Just a little dizzy from sitting still so long."

Finn frowned for a moment, then seemed to accept Blaine's answer, nodding with his crooked smile. Another laugh came from the car and Blaine felt himself cringe slightly, but Finn didn't seem to notice.

"Is everyone ready to keep going?" Rachel screeched as she walked out of the rest stop bathroom a few minutes later, looking thoroughly traumatized.

"Yep!" Kurt said from behind Blaine. The latter turned around in surprise and smiled at his boyfriend, who planted a kiss on his forehead, then his mouth.

"Ew!" Rachel said with a smile, glancing at Finn awkwardly before getting into the car.

"You don't need to use the bathroom or anything?" Blaine asked after they pulled apart.

Kurt shook his head. "I just pulled over because I knew Sam would want to talk to me." He kissed Blaine's cheek before turning and walking back to the driver's seat.

--

Blaine and Finn spent a day sightseeing with Rachel a few weeks after they'd all settled in, going to the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island and even seeing Wicked. Finn came out humming ‘Defying Gravity' and Blaine and Rachel couldn't stop belting ‘For Good', to the dismay of their fellow New Yorkers on the sidewalk.

They returned to their apartment in good spirits, laughing all the way home on the train and never allowing their smiles to falter in each other's company.

If Blaine had learned anything in his time in New York so far, it was that he truly loved Rachel and Finn. It was incredibly awkward, seeing as Finn and Rachel weren't really back together yet and so they'd curtained off another room for him, but it was still comfortable. In fact, Blaine was more nervous about Santana rejoining them than anything else.

Until, that is, he walked in on Kurt Skyping with Sam with wet hair and a half-open shirt.

He'd turned around quickly and smiled brightly at them.

"Oh, you guys are back early! Come say ‘hi' to Sam!"

Finn and Rachel yelled out their excitement and Blaine smiled in spite of himself, his heart swelling when he heard Sam's voice.

"Hey guys! Tina and Artie just got here and they say ‘hi!'"

"Hi!" they all cried back, waving madly and grinning uncontrollably. They appeared on either side of Sam on the screen, who was shirtless, but no one seemed to pay any attention to that. In fact, Blaine wondered if any of them noticed that Sam was sitting in Kurt's old bedroom.

"Dang, Kurt, you're flashing a lot of skin there!" Artie teased, and Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Oh, hush, before I send Sugar after your sweaters."

Artie made a look of mock horror and they all laughed except Blaine, who couldn't bring himself to get over the fact that even Artie knew that Kurt hardly ever let himself be seen without being totally composed, yet here he was, clearly just-showered and barely dressed, talking to Sam, who was also barely dressed.

He noticed Finn glancing his way with worry and shook his body slightly, a soft smile settling on his face. It seemed to be enough, because Finn looked away from him.

"So when are you coming, Tina?" asked Finn, and Blaine turned his attention to his friend with excitement at the prospect of her being so near him.

"Not until right before school starts. NYU doesn't open dorms until like a week before classes."

Rachel squealed and clapped with excitement. "I can't wait for you to get here! And if you want to come early, you can share my bed until your dorm opens!"

Tina smiled. "I'll think about it."

"Well, we'll let you guys get back to whatever you were doing, because we are going out!" Sam said excitedly.

"Where are you guys headed?" asked Blaine, managing to get over how overwhelmed he was to take notice of his friends.

"Oh, Sugar's having a bit of a get-together for Ryder's birthday. She's throwing it early since he's going to be gone next week on his real birthday, and you know how she loves to celebrate practically anything."

They all nodded and made noises of agreement.

"We'll let you go then, Sam. Love you!" Kurt said, and everyone called out the same sentiments after, calling love to each other. Blaine absentmindedly did the same, not really able to focus on anything but the ‘love you' Kurt had said to Sam.

--

Things only got weirder after that. Classes began and sometimes Blaine would come home to find Kurt hanging up or suddenly changing the subject with whomever he was talking to, flashing him a smile before walking into Rachel or Finn's area to finish the call in a whisper. Blaine felt like crying every time, but would smile back when Kurt would come out and give him a kiss, sometimes more if they didn't expect the others to be back for a while.

On top of that, NYADA proved to be much more rigorous than he'd expected. Between dance and acting classes and his vocal lessons, along with his part-time job at the coffee shop on the corner, he felt on edge almost all the time. He knew it was a matter of finding a rhythm in the city, but his time just hadn't come yet. He managed to see Tina at least once a week, Wes was still over at Columbia, and Santana had finally come back to the apartment, but he still felt so small in the city, despite having  six friends from home with him.

Blaine knew he was likable, but he was also aware that he came across as a little uptight. People were friendly to him, but many didn't approach him and, to be honest, he was a little afraid of people that weren't from Ohio. There was something they all shared in that state, a sort of default politeness that dictated you at least respond to someone. In New York, he knew people were harsher, and he was scared to face that.

It was Finn who caused him to finally snap one day.

He came home from his last class, emotionally exhausted after acting exercises that made tap into his vulnerabilities, something he hated doing at all costs. Finn was fixing dinner, something they'd discovered he was actually pretty good at. There were two heads of lettuce in his hands and he was looking at them with deep contemplation.

"Hey, man! Do you think Kurt would like Romaine or iceberg lettuce with this salad? I know you and Santana and Rachel probably won't care but-," 

Blaine threw his bag down on their little couch. "I don't know, why don't you ask Sam?"

"Whoa, what? What's going on?" He set down the lettuce and walked carefully to Blaine, hands held up slightly in front of him as though he was approaching a wild animal.

The younger collapsed back onto their couch, hiding his face in his hands and resting his elbows on his knees.  He said something from behind his hands that Finn didn't quite catch.

"What? I'm sorry, man, I couldn't hear you."

Blaine lifted his head and stared at the ceiling, eyes squeezed shut and fists clenched on his lap. "I think Kurt cheated on me with Sam."

He didn't have to open his eyes to know Finn was gaping at him. He was startled, however, to feel the couch shift with Finn's weight.

"What makes you say that?"

Blaine turned and looked at him. "I just have a feeling."

"But Sam's-,"

"Straight?" Finn nodded. "Who knows? I kissed Rachel and liked it, once upon a time. Maybe he kissed Kurt and liked it. Who wouldn't like kissing Kurt?"

Finn looked around awkwardly. Blaine continued. "All I know is that Kurt's been acting really strange lately. Taking phone calls in secret, Skyping with Sam half-shirtless, hiding his phone when he goes places; doesn't that sound suspicious?"

"Dude, why aren't you saying anything to him about it? Why aren't you asking him what's going on?"

Blaine was quiet, staring ahead at their door and feeling like he'd been hit with a freight train when he realized why he didn't say anything.

"I don't want to lose him again."

--

After the confession, Blaine and Finn didn't bring it up, but they did share meaningful looks when Kurt would leave the room for a call or when they'd catch him texting for long periods of time. None of them said anything, and Blaine was thankful that Finn respected his wishes. He didn't want to confront Kurt, not after he'd blown the Chandler thing out of proportion, not after he'd hurt Kurt so deeply already. Let him do what he wanted. It's not like he could have sex with him or anything while they were across the country from each other. 

--

By Halloween, Blaine still wasn't really able to determine whether or not Kurt treated him differently. They were all so busy with class (and Santana with auditions and work) that none of them really had a lot of time to relax while they were finding their patterns in the city again.

Therefore, Kurt decided that they needed to throw a Halloween party slash early birthday party for Blaine to let off steam, telling them to invite people from their classes and that he would invite people from the Vogue.com office. Blaine still hadn't made very many friends, but he invited his partner in acting class, a Latina girl named Jennifer, and a few guys from his dance class who seemed nice and sometimes sat in the dining hall with him during his breaks.

He was let out of class early that day because his acting prof was in a particularly good mood, and he raced home to finish his David Bowie costume (Kurt was going as Freddie Mercury, a decision that only came with many arguments and a near split before Finn stepped in and told them they were being stupid for fighting over who got to wear the Bowie platforms. Blaine said that it was more interesting for him to go as the androgynous one while Kurt insisted he had better bone structure for the look).

Blaine walked into the apartment with a sigh, then nearly had a heart attack when he saw a pretty blonde woman sitting at their dining room table with an issue of Vogue (he didn't remember the cover, which was strange because he had a talent for remembering Vogue covers) and a can of Diet Coke.

She looked up in surprise and jumped when she saw him. She put down the magazine, stood up, and walked toward him.

"Hi, I'm Isabelle Wright! I'm waiting for Kurt," she looked around awkwardly about halfway to the door, as though having second thoughts about shaking his hand. "Finn let me in; he had to go do a study group," she said after a minute, laughing nervously. She tilted her head to the side and studied him for a moment. "Are you Blaine?"

He nodded, starstruck.

She grinned. "I should have known. Kurt always said you looked like a tiny, better looking Jesse Bradford. Now I see what he means." She winked and even though he was gay, Blaine swore he had butterflies. Did Isabelle Wright just imply that he was good looking? He wasn't quite sure he knew exactly who Jesse Bradford was, but he made a note to Google him ASAP.

The woman made the rest of the way across the room and held out her hand. Blaine came to his senses enough to smile politely and shake it, still awed by her presence in his apartment.

"I'm helping with the party tonight and figured I could do some work here instead of being all cooped up in my office," she hesitated then, put off by Blaine's silence. "I hope that's okay?"

Blaine nodded profusely, clearing his throat so he could quit acting like an idiot. "Of course! Can I get you anything? I'm so sorry, I usually have better manners." He shook his head with smile and ran to fill a glass with water.

"Oh, no, honey, I'm fine," she responded quickly. Blaine smiled sheepishly at his enthusiasm and drank the water himself. "You just forget I'm even here."

Blaine wanted to snort at that. It wasn't every day that he walked home to one of biggest names in fashion just chilling at his dining room table.

He awkwardly finished the glass in his hand before practically stumbling back to the area he shared with Kurt and getting the supplies for his costume. There really wasn't much left to do except add the shoulder pads to his striped jacket.

"Kurt tells me you're going as David Bowie?"

Blaine turned from his place on the living room floor and nodded with a smile. "I've decided to go with the Ziggy Stardust look."

"A bold choice."

Isabelle stood up and moved into the room, kneeling next to him on the floor and gently running the jacket under her fingers.

"Where did you even find this material?"
"Kurt found it," Blaine answered with a grin. "Apparently he did some things he's not proud of, but I don't care because it really is perfect."

"It's outstanding," Isabelle agreed, a soft smile playing at her lips. "I thought he was upset with you for taking Bowie away from him."

Blaine chuckled. "He is, but he said  he couldn't stand to see me in a half-assed costume; not after I refused to go shirtless two years ago," Isabelle frowned in confusion and Blaine shook his head. "Long story. Anyway, he says it was his decision and that he's letting me have Bowie because it's my birthday party, but he just can't admit that our decision-maker chose me."

Isabelle chuckled and nodded, looking as though she knew exactly what Blaine was talking about. "So is there anything I can help with?"

"Oh, no, I wouldn't want to bother you with that,"

"Don't be silly, birthday boy!" Isabelle beamed at him and, yep, he melted a bit. "Honey, I don't want to offend you, but your sleeves are a bit crooked,"

Blaine almost wanted to argue, but after further inspection, he had to admit she was right.

"How about you put it on and I'll help you even out those arms before Kurt gets back?"

He nodded and followed her instructions, moving his arms into different positions and letting his mind wander as she measured. After she took it off, a thought came to him.

"Actually, Kurt should be back by now. Do you know where he went?"

"Oh, he needed to use my office to video call someone. Our wi-fi is a lot better than yours and you know how impatient he can be."

Blaine nodded absently, rushing to ask her another question. "Do you know who he had to call?"

"Oh, your blond friend! The one with the...mouth? Um...what was his name, it's coming to me-,"

"Sam," Blaine offered. Isabelle nodded enthusiastically.

"Yep! That's the one."

Blaine swallowed and nodded with a tight smile. Isabelle took the jacket off of him and began working on it, leaving him to begin straightening his hair. He went to the bathroom and washed out his gel, then quickly used Rachel's hairdryer.

A few minutes later, she clapped her hands and said, "Done!"

Blaine grinned and tried it on. The sleeves were perfect, of course.

"Thank you so much, Ms. Wright, you didn't have to do this,"

She waved him away. "Stop it. There's no way I could pass up helping with a David Bowie costume. And call me Isabelle, please." She held out her arms for a hug and he slowly walked into them, trying to be gentle with her thin body but being surprised by the power of her embrace. She hugged him tightly and genuinely, sort of how Kurt hugged him.

He didn't want to pull away, but had to when he smelled something burning.

"Shit!" he cried, pulling away and running back to the flat iron sitting on the edge of the sink, burning the end of the toilet paper on the counter. At that moment, Kurt walked in and made a delighted noise when he saw Isabelle, who was now sitting at their table nonchalantly, as if she had never left her seat to help Blaine. He smirked.

"Isabelle! Did you meet Blaine?"

"I sure did. What a sweetheart," she remarked, smiling in his direction. "Did you get what you needed?"

Kurt looked around furtively. "Yes, I did. Thank you again."

"No problem. Now where is that Freddie Mercury outfit you've been keeping secret for so long?"

Blaine came out then, clearing his throat. "Yeah, Kurt. I don't even know where you could have hidden it, I've looked everywhere."

Kurt smiled and didn't say anything before walking into Finn's curtained room and rummaging around somewhere. He came out with what looked like a lot of leather and-

"Red braces? Don't tell me-," Isabelle began, but Kurt cut her off excitedly.

"Yes, I am going with Freddie's stage costume from the ‘Jazz' tour in 1978, complete with braces," he held them up. "And the Muir cap," he put down the braces and held up the cap.

"Where did you even find all of this?" Isabelle asked, a small smile on her face while she laid out the pieces with Kurt.

"Well, the Village is full of interesting shops and I happen to be pretty courageous when it comes to looking for unique pieces. 

"But it's just a leather jacket and leather pants," Blaine interjected, pulling himself from visualizing Kurt in the outfit.

"Blaine," Kurt said sternly, holding the jacket up. "Look at these sleeves. Look at the cut. Do you think I could have found this in Macy's?"

He considered it. "Maybe at Ed Hardy," he teased, flinching away with a laugh when Kurt threw one of Rachel's stress balls at him.

Kurt seemed to notice Blaine's jacket then, tilting his head. "You did pretty well, honey. I mean, I still insist that you should have gone with Halloween Jack instead, or, you know, Freddie Mercury, but you didn't do a bad job."

Blaine chuckled and finally crossed the room to give Kurt a kiss. As always, they lingered in each other space for a few seconds after breaking apart, breathing in each other and finding calm for at least a few minutes.

Finally, Blaine pulled away and smiled. "Are you ever going to get over me winning?"

"You didn't win, I just conceded. I knew Tina was the wrong person to ask, you had a year to win her over and get her to do what you want,"

When they'd been fighting over who would get to be Bowie, they decided to ask the most impartial person they could find to pick for them. Artie couldn't because Kurt insisted he was in love with Blaine, and Blaine said the same about Puck, who he declared would always be on Kurt's side. No one in the apartment dared interfere and Mike and Mercedes point blank refused when asked. Eventually, they realized that Tina was obviously the person to ask. Kurt was indignant when she'd picked Blaine, saying he would be a more interesting Bowie and that Kurt would be a wonderful Freddie Mercury.

"I'm only doing this because it's your birthday! And I'm not wearing a freaking mustache," he added before leaving the apartment in a huff, only to come back a few minutes later to gossip with Tina about some guy in her history class.

"Best of all, there's no mustache!" Kurt said now, and Blaine laughed.

--

It was half an hour before the party when Blaine almost ruined everything.

They were both in full costume, Kurt looking incredible in his Freddie look (and positively indecent, if Blaine was being honest.) Santana, Rachel, Finn, and Tina were being loud out in the living area, fighting and laughing as usual, already dressed in whatever they were going as

Kurt was painting a gold circle on Blaine's face when he asked if he was okay.

"I'm fine," Blaine answered carefully with a small smile. "Just excited for the party."

"You know, I was thinking...are you okay with your birthday party being a Halloween party? I mean, we could just do something tomorrow instead, since it's your actual birthday and all."

Blaine stilled Kurt's hand on his face with his own and held it between his. "I love that we're doing something for all of us instead of just for me. You're the best and if I felt bad about it, I would have said something."

Kurt tilted his head. "Would you?"

Blaine froze, feeling anger irrationally swell inside of him. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Kurt put down his brush and held up his hands, the same way Finn did when Blaine blew up on him. "I'm just saying that the other day, Santana gave you a lemon poppyseed muffin and you ate it, even though you hate lemon poppyseed muffins."

"I was just being polite!"

"I also know that you hate when Finn takes the sports section of the paper while you're reading it, but you never say anything about it."

"It doesn't even bother me that much. And what's wrong with being nice?"

"What's wrong with just saying ‘no'?" Kurt countered.

Blaine sat, stunned at Kurt's words. He was still angry, though he didn't know really know why, but something clicked as Kurt said that. Saying ‘no' wasn't something he'd really thought much about. He'd tried when Sebastian would text him all the time, but that hadn't really been too bothersome and he eventually sort of developed a friendship with him. He'd said ‘no' when Brittany gave him Sam as a VP, but what was wrong with giving people a chance? Sam became his best friend.

He couldn't deny, though, that some things might have been easier if he'd just stood up for himself. If he'd said ‘no' to Sebastian, he wouldn't have had to get that terrifying surgery and he wouldn't live in fear of slushies in general. If he'd said ‘no' to Brittany and Sam, he wouldn't be so heartbroken all the time because his best friend and his boyfriend had something going on.

Unfortunately, the anger lingered underneath these revelations, and Kurt's words only fueled that fire.

"No one will hate you if you just tell them ‘no', Blaine."

"You would."

He didn't mean to say it. Everything was crashing around him, all the puzzle pieces fitting together, yet crumbling at the same time. It was like the security he spent so long to create for himself had rendered itself useless, and his heart was breaking at the look on Kurt's face.

"W-what do you mean?"

"I mean," he said, voice strained and strangely wobbly, as though he were fighting to stay in control. "That if I stood up to you, you would leave me."

"Stand up to me? What did I do? Blaine, if I hurt you, you have to let me know,"

Blaine stood and walked from the two chairs they were using to their bed. "I have no right to say anything. Not after what I did to you."

"Blaine, please tell me what you're talking about," Kurt begged, near tears.

"I'm talking about Sam!"

Kurt frowned with confusion and the voices outside grew quiet. Blaine waited until they started talking again to continue.

"I saw you two, the morning after you came back. You were sleeping together, practically naked, and his shorts were all crooked."

"Blaine-,"

"Not to mention that you're always calling him in secret, and Skyping him when you barely have a shirt on, and texting him all the time,"

"Let me-,"

"Plus, he's been staying in your room. And don't think I haven't noticed how happy you get when you talk to him and how excited you are. You're never that excited about me-,"

"Blaine!" Kurt yelled, the voices outside growing silent again.

"I'm sorry," Blaine said, cutting him off again and burying his face in his hands. "I know I don't have the right, and I don't want you to leave me, and I've been looking the other way for so long that I really don't care if you keep-,"

"Stop it. Stop it right now. Don't say another goddamned word if you know what's good for you,"

Blaine nodded, eyes full of tears.

"That night I got back? The house was incredibly hot. Like ridiculously hot. Something was wrong with the AC and so I told Sam he could sleep in the basement with me because more than two people in a room made it even worse. That's actually why he was sleeping there before he left for California; he thinks Finn's room is too hot, so I told him he could stay in mine until he left. He slept on the bed that night because both of us are very secure about sexualities and relationships and, if you didn't notice, he slept on top of the blankets.

"We didn't have shirts on because, like I said, it was hot. You know I hardly sleep with a shirt anyway. His shorts were crooked because he's a terrible sleeper. He moves around all the time and I had to end up just pulling him toward me to keep him still. I'm guessing you saw him laying on me, and that's why, okay?"

Blaine opened his mouth, but Kurt didn't let him talk. "Sam is my brother now, Blaine. I know there was that dumb crush, but you can't really have a crush on someone when they live with you."

"I live with you," Blaine interjected, and Kurt glared.

"I'm in love with you. It's different," he said simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Maybe it was.

"What about the phone calls and the video calls?"
Kurt sighed. "I don't want to tell you."

Blaine nodded sadly.

"No, Blaine, it's just," he looked around, as though the answer would be written on the wall.

Suddenly, there was a bit of a commotion outside the curtain and Kurt grinned. "Maybe I can tell you now." He looked out, jumped a bit, and turned around.

"Okay, here's the deal. The reason I've been calling and Skyping and texting Sam constantly is because one, we're family and he's having a hard time being away from his, and two, we've been planning a surprise for you."
Blaine looked up. "What?"

Kurt smiled and waved at someone from outside the curtain. 

Sam walked in, already dressed up as Wolverine and grinning from ear-to-ear.

"Sam!" Blaine cried, getting up and hugging him. That doubt was still nagging at the back of his mind, but he was too excited by Sam's presence to really notice.

"Happy birthday, man! Do you know how hard it was to keep this a secret?"

Blaine glanced at Kurt, who was smiling broadly but had some sadness hidden in the lines of his face.

"I'm sure it was very difficult."

"I told Isabelle to tell you I was Skyping him, but I was actually picking him up from the airport. He's been out sightseeing with Wes while we get ready."

"Yeah, man, Wes is great! I totally need to hang out with him more back home."

Blaine gaped, then managed to make his mouth work. "I'm so glad you think so," he said simply.

"Sam, I'm so happy you're here, but can I talk to Blaine in private for a bit? Then you can steal him for the rest of the night."

The blond boy nodded, still grinning , and ran out to join the rest of them.

"I'm sorry, Kurt-,"

"Blaine," Kurt said sharply. "Come sit down for a minute."

Blaine complied, nervous.

"So you thought that I was cheating on you with Sam?"

Blaine nodded.

"And you didn't say anything about it because you thought you didn't have the right to?"

"I don't-,"

"Blaine, you have a right to get angry when people are hurting you."

"But I-,"

"If I was still hung up on what you did, Blaine, we wouldn't be here right now. I wouldn't be wearing a ridiculous Freddie Mercury costume while you wear hideous stripes and I wouldn't be painting a gold circle on your face. I wouldn't have saved up money for months to help fly your best friend out here because I know you're having trouble making new ones. I wouldn't lay here with you every single night, feeling like I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be for the first time in my life."

Tears were running down his face and Blaine wanted to kiss them all away, wanted to take back everything he said so Kurt wouldn't feel this way. He could almost feel the anger seeping out of his body, being filled by the sad realization that Kurt was absolutely right, but that he still didn't really believe it.

Kurt took a breath and kept talking.

"If I was cheating on you, I would want you to get angry with me. I don't want you to let yourself be in pain because you think you don't have the right to be angry.

This is going to sound so corny, but you matter, Blaine. You matter and you don't have to sit and let yourself hurt because you made one mistake as a teenager."

Blaine collapsed into Kurt with tears and, of course, Kurt caught him.

--

 It didn't change everything, but it changed a lot. Blaine felt a little silly for thinking there was something going on with Sam and Kurt now that he knew they were just planning his party. They were clearly very good friends, but he supposed his jealousy goggles made it seem like a lot more. 

He slapped Finn's hand away from the paper one morning, and was not surprised to see that Finn didn't mind in the least. He never tried to take the sports section again and Blaine felt silly for thinking he would offend him. Finn was hardly offended by anything; all he needed was a little direction if he was doing something rude.

The next time Santana offered him a lemon poppyseed muffin, he politely said that he wasn't fond of the flavor, and she responded by giving him her blueberry one. It was such a simple gesture that Blaine just gaped for a while at it in his hand.

It was still so hard for him to feel like he was being polite, though, when he refused things or said ‘no'. Sometimes Kurt would help and refuse for him, but a lot of the time he left Blaine to his own devices.

"It's okay," Kurt would whisper in his ear. "I promise they're not going to get mad at you."

Sometimes he would get a funny look when declining something, but if he was being honest, that was probably because he grinned every time he managed to do it.

The greatest moment had to be when his father called and begged him to transfer to Columbia.

"They accepted you before, Blaine, I'm sure they'll accept you now."

"Why did you even let me come to NYADA, then, Dad?"

"Because I love you and I want you to be happy. I'd hoped you would realize how ridiculous you're being with this dream, but you haven't and I'm beginning to worry."

"Dad, this is my passion-,"

"It's a fantasy, Blaine. Just apply to Columbia again. If you don't get in, you can stay at that school."

Blaine hesitated, verging on the idea of agreeing with him. What would it hurt? He could apply and lie if he got in. It wouldn't be hard. He opened his mouth to say he would. It would be so easy, to just tell his father ‘yes' and continue with his life.

He looked over at the dining room table and saw Kurt and Rachel going through a scene. Kurt was angry, speaking intensely while Rachel looked away, indignant. It looked so real, and Blaine was reminded of how he was blown away by both of them every day, by how talented they both were. It was easy to forget that he was just as good as them, that he had gotten into NYADA, too.

"No, Dad."

He braced himself for the aftermath of his rejection, prepared to be disowned or cut off or yelled at. His father sighed.

"If that's what you want to do, Blaine, then I'm not going to stop you."

"What?" Blaine asked, taken aback.

"You know I don't approve, but I'm not going to be that parent that makes their child do something they don't want to do. I think you'd make a great doctor or lawyer, Blaine, but if it's not going to make you happy, then there's no point in me making you do it."

"Dad," Blaine said, choked up. He couldn't continue, but his father quickly interceded.

"It's okay, son. Go back to studying. I'm sorry I've been pressuring you so much."

"Th-thank you," Blaine said, clearing his throat. "I'm sorry, Dad,"

"Don't be. Go study."

"Bye, Dad," Blaine said with smile. "Love you."

"Love you, too. Call me tomorrow."

"I will."

They hung up and Blaine sat there, bewildered by his father's reaction. All those years of pressuring him to apply to the Ivies, glancing doubtfully at his sheet music, and missing his performances; all he'd had to do was say ‘no'.

"Everything okay?" asked Kurt, appearing beside him.

Blaine reached up and brought Kurt's face down to his. Their lips met and Blaine sucked his breath in, just like every other time.

"Yes," he said.

"You sure?" Kurt asked with a smile. Blaine smiled back, and knew with all of his body and soul that he was telling the truth. He quickly kissed him again.

"Yes."