June 4, 2012, 1:56 p.m.
Wandering Through Life
Snatches of life with Blaine and Kurt, spanning from Blaine's senior year until the end. "The months rolled by, Blaine worked hard, doing his best as the new lead male of the Glee Club and getting great grades. It was a struggle."
K - Words: 2,834 - Last Updated: Jun 04, 2012 782 0 1 1 Categories: Romance, Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, Tags: established relationship, futurefic, hurt/comfort,
He watched his boyfriend leave, walking away from him for all he knew, the last time. Tears tracked down his handsome face, marring the vision from his shining golden-brown eyes. He bit his lips, trying to keep in the sobs, his shoulders shaking from the tears wracking his body. Suddenly he felt a strong arm go around his shoulders. His love’s father. They’d promised to look after each other without him around. He guessed that started now. He let himself be pulled into the hug, his boyfriend’s step-mom wrapping herself around him from behind as he cried into the older man’s chest. His heart shattering, not listening to the soothing words, that they’d keep in touch and be together again one day.
The months rolled by, Blaine worked hard, doing his best as the new lead male of the Glee Club and getting great grades. It was a struggle. Some days he felt like falling apart but then he’d get a message from Kurt, one of his friends or Kurt’s parents would find some time for him in their lives. The first time it happened was Thanksgiving. He wasn’t coming back. The snows had come hard and fast, too early to be able to get out of New York. They spent Thanksgiving Day in their respective places, having dinner over Skype. Then Christmas was spent alone, as Burt and Carole went to see Kurt and Blaine was left alone, unable to pay and them unable to pay for him. He threw his present from Kurt across the room and spent Christmas Day eating ice cream and watching old movies and videos from taped stuff of the Warblers, New Directions and himself and Kurt.
The phone calls and messages tapered off. Burt blamed it on Kurt’s workload. He’d been lucky to get into Juilliard, really, after the rejection by NYADA so he was working his cute ass off to make everyone glad they’d taken the chance on the late arrival. The gay, Glee Club, National Champion kid from Ohio. Blaine couldn’t help feeling betrayed. He tried getting over Kurt. Life had gone on without him, so why shouldn’t he? In the New Year he put in his applications. The one to Juilliard more impressive, more heart and soul in it than the rest. Life carried on, Blaine didn’t move on, he couldn’t. His heart belonged to Kurt and always would. He coped, his heart and soul mending with each day, his stride gaining strength. He could live without Kurt; he just didn’t want to, he desperately hoped Juilliard would accept him, waiting with baited breath as the acceptance letters came and screaming when it came, they loved him. He went straight to Burt and Carole who took him out for dinner, celebrating his acceptance and the boy himself.
Blaine never heard from Kurt, he couldn’t reach him and Burt’s eyes would shift every time he mentioned him. He’d almost begged Burt to phone Kurt for him but he didn’t want to do that to either the older man or his boyfriend. Was he still his boyfriend? Blaine learned the guitar, built up his musical strengths and put his all into Glee Club, sure life would come back together some day.
He heard from Rachel sporadically, she never spoke about Kurt. Santana kept him clued in with her progress, he was proud of her; she never talked about Kurt either. He should be angrier really but life had changed around him so quickly and time had given him a different view on life. He was more laidback now; he could see how he’d been back then. He could see how his insecurities and self-blame had pushed Kurt into texting another man, how his own aversion to pdas had changed things for them. Alone they’d been great but out there in the real world, at school, they’d drifted. The performance at Nationals had been the first time he’d danced with Kurt publicly in a long time, he’d missed it, and he could see how things had ended up this way. Life had been hard, but Blaine had picked himself up and carried on.
Blaine breathed New York in, his lungs filling with the city. The sights, the smells, how the short, tanned-skinned, dapper, gelled dark curly haired teen would fit into this place; he couldn’t wait to find out.
The first few days swept over Blaine like a wave, he found himself his dorm room, he went to orientation and found himself exhilarated, and this beautiful place exactly where he wanted to be. His heart lived here, after all. He aced his entrance exams and bonded with some of his new classmates, finding some kindred spirits in the other new students, some straight, some gay, none he wanted.
Blaine had to admit he had lurked around the campus when the returning students were around, registering for their classes. He wandered through the park, drank so much coffee in the coffee shops he was sure he’d damaged something but he never saw Kurt.
Blaine started his classes, revelling in all the challenges, everything he was learning, how he was developing, Blaine soaked up the world around him, drinking it in and becoming a new man under its influence.
It was a few months into the semester, when a knock came at his door. It was November; the wind had turned cold, promising snow and bitter weather, thrilling Blaine and depressing him at the same time. He loved the winter, the coldness giving new depth to the world and finally he’d see a New York winter; but at the same time he was here in this city, alone.
Blaine woke to a knock on his door; he shouted that he’d only be a minute. He threw on a red top and black jeans, and ran his fingers through his curly hair. He’d stopped gelling his hair three weeks into the semester, making his hair work for him, conditioning it and treating it properly so it curled in locks instead of a bush. He ran to the door, turning the lock and opened it, expecting one of his dorm mates or Santana who dropped by occasionally. His mouth dropped open.
Kurt. Blaine stared at his ex; he guessed he was his ex since the boys hadn’t spoken in months. He was gorgeous, his glasz eyes framed by the gorgeous face he’d spent hours staring at, still pale but glowing in a way Blaine understood, he loved this place too. He was wearing black leggings, black boots, and a blue top with the Juilliard logo across it and his hair perfectly styled as always.
Blaine stopped breathing for a few seconds and warred with himself. He wanted to slam the door in the older man’s face and wanted to sweep him into a hug and never let go at the same time. Blaine settled for wordlessly ushering the gorgeous man who’d stolen, then shattered his heart in to his dorm room, the other man looking it over appraisingly, noticing the pictures of them from the two proms they’d been to together.
They sat and talked for hours, demanding explanations and expressing regret, in the end it had been Blaine’s own insecurities that had transferred to Kurt, the older teen suddenly scared that Blaine would forget him, that they’d both be too different and that their love would have no place in the halls of this revered college. Blaine had told him off, they’d yelled, kissed and made up.
The morning came and Kurt lay in Blaine’s bed, watching the younger man’s face, he had grown over the year Kurt had missed, the flush of youth gone, leaving angles he’d never possessed and a sureness Blaine had never been blessed with. Kurt fell in love all over again. They walked to their classes, making promises and plans for the future. Blaine planned to move out of the dorms and into Kurt and Rachel’s apartment, the inheritance he’d gained from his parents as a ‘thank goodness we’re finally free of you’ giving him enough to pay rent and look after himself and Kurt very well.
Their relationship was different now. Without McKinley, the New Directions, Lima, both men had grown and changed. More sure and mature than they’d ever been and both knew what they wanted out of life, how to get it and what their mistakes had been. They weren’t the kids who’d fallen in love through a song about a dead bird and a duet purely as an excuse to get more time with the other. They were the man who’d enjoyed a childhood passion, had gone through hell, living life without the other and come through it, each knowing they had a place in this world and just deciding to be in those places together.
The years rolled on, Kurt graduated and became one of the new talents on Broadway, his skill, vocals and fashion sense making him a favourite with all the best producers and gained him a following with fans watching his every move, his fashions choices, and his stage choices, his political and social choices. Kurt was changing the world. Rachel graduated and joined Kurt as one of the most desired voices, her own little fan army growing as she took on each role with grace and energy.
Blaine itched for his own graduation, yearning to become the singer he desired to be, the get the album he and Kurt talked about and to change the world too.
Burt and Carole came to his graduation, cheering on as he threw his cap in the air, Burt yelling as though Blaine was his own son.
They all took pictures together, the Hummel-Hudson-Anderson family, strong, all of them.
Blaine released his first album on his and Kurt’s anniversary, dedicating the album to ‘the man who saved me’ and writing four of the songs purely about Kurt and their love, another two about the pain of their time apart and three about their days at school. It went platinum.
His second album was a duet record with Kurt encompassing show tunes, songs they’d sung at school; both at Dalton and McKinley and songs they’d come up with together, Kurt singing as Blaine strummed his guitar late at night in their apartment and Damrosch Park giving impromptu sessions as their classmates watched and joined in.
About two years after Kurt’s graduation gay marriage became legal and Kurt and Blaine’s names were among the first on the lists to be legally married, something they’d both dreamed of for years, since they’d both talked about it in school separately and together, quietly discussing it as if they had a clue.
The ceremony was beautiful, they’d managed to get the New Directions together, quietly singing them down the aisle, the venue tastefully and stylishly decorated. Blaine had left most of it to Kurt as he’d done Burt and Carole’s wedding and his style surpassed Blaine’s immensely. In the end the whole wedding had been a mix of both their styles, parts of themselves in everything. They chose their own vows, promising never to forget their love and the journey they’d been on and to love and adore each other. Not to obey but understand and accept and to only raise their voices in song and adoration. Blaine had never seen Burt cry so much.
They’d both worn light blue, their clothing matched to every detail and Blaine had gelled his hair for the first time in over five years, Kurt had cried when he saw him, telling him it took him back to the day when Blaine had grabbed his hand and pulled him along, down the Dalton hallway and every day afterwards.
They and the New Directions sang at the reception, crying with memories, watching how their friends had grown. The ones they’d kept up with, the ones they’d watched with pride, the ones who’d fallen into the background, the ones who’d died.
Years passed, dreams were lived; Kurt became a massive power in the show world, eventually moving on to fashion and designing and to writing and producing his own shows. Blaine churned out albums, each one reflecting the light that shone in his soul, never losing a part of himself to ‘the machine’ that was the music world. He eventually moved on to acting, bringing the world his brilliance and showing everyone there was something to be said for every story and everything people do changes the world somehow.
At 27 they became fathers to twins through surrogate, running Russian roulette by mixing their sperm with the egg donated by Rachel, none of them willing for her to put her career on hold by carrying it herself. They had a little boy and girl, both as much a mix of Kurt and Blaine as the men themselves.
Benjamin and Calandra, named after the song Kurt, Rachel and Finn had sung to Blaine when he’d almost been blinded and a name Blaine had come across while reading. The names meaning son of my right hand and beautiful voice skylark respectively. Benjamin had curly, dark hair and bright blue almond shaped eyes and giggled constantly. Calandra had lighter, straighter hair, Blaine’s honey-brown eyes and darker skin and a more thoughtful, peaceful personality. They grew happy and adored, strong singers like their three parents, enjoying the camera every time someone took their picture or a documentary maker filmed them.
Kurt watched his children, chasing each other to the school bus, their first day of high school, still the playful, happy kids he and Blaine had brought them up to be. They’d taken the day off to be there for their kids, every landmark more important to them than anything else they’d ever do or done. Kurt felt arms go around him from behind as he waved back at the kids and a deep voice whispering that in a few seconds they’d be alone. Kurt laughed as the bus pulled away, a part of him pulled away with it on that bus and turned around in his husband’s arms, kissing him deeply and letting himself be dragged into the house after his horny other half.
The kids came home full of stories, friends, teachers, classes they liked, things they found challenging and about their Glee Club. Every worry that their children would be marred by the hardships they’d endured in High School was washed away. Benjamin and Calandra were amazing kids, charming, friendly and strong in themselves. Kurt and Blaine were proud parents.
The acceptance letters came, Benjamin off to Michigan and Calandra to Kurt and Blaine’s alma mater, Juilliard. At 45 and 44 Blaine and Kurt had slowed down, their careers as the blazing lights of Broadway and Hollywood behind them, they were now respected, their stars gracing the boulevard, tributes to their careers written and acted out as younger talents, including their friends’ children coming in and taking their places, walking in their shoes. They spent more time together, travelling the world and enjoying life as parents and husbands.
They visited friends, raising glasses in toasts and letting tears fall in goodbyes. Lives lived well.
Years rolled on and they watched their children married to people who shared their childrens’ souls, just as they had, watched Burt say goodbye to the world, Carole following not long after, watched as their children had their own children and brought them up in the same loving, adored environment as Kurt and Blaine had raised Benjamin and Calandra themselves. They’d done well.
Kurt’s hips no longer swung the way they had when they were 17, Blaine’s voice no longer drew the same resonance as it had when they were young, and they were ok with that. Blaine remembered the talk they’d had all those years ago in the classroom, Blaine scared about the future, taking about a random movie they’d seen and Kurt as ever soothing them both, his view of life with Blaine in it. The view was good.
Blaine looked over at Kurt, sitting in his chair, blanket wrapped around him. At 87 Kurt was still beautiful to Blaine. The younger man walked over, sitting down and cuddling up to Kurt as he turned his head, eyes tearing away from the setting sun to settle on Blaine’s wrinkled, but still handsome face. Kurt smiled, resting his cheek against Blaine’s. They talked about their life, the triumphs and failures, the happiness’s and sad, their love, and the year they spent finding themselves. They talked about The Notebook, both laughing about their talk in the classroom, their view of the end of life and why wasn’t Blaine watching a tribute to J.Lo.
Slowly, as the sun set their breathing slowed and they fell asleep like that, curled up around each other, smiles on their faces. Saying goodbye to the world, their journey fulfilled. The words so long ago, true.