"How many glasses of wine have you guys had?" Rachel laughed at Blaine and Kurt giggling on the floor. They had a picnic set up on several layers of blankets in the middle of Rachel and Kurt's living area.

"Bottles." Kurt replied, nuzzling Blaine's neck.

"KURT" Rachel squealed. "You still get tipsy on one glass of wine."

"We may be a little shitfaced." Blaine squinted and tried to bring Rachel into focus.

"Maybe I should stay and make sure you two don't die of alcohol poisoning." Rachel put her bag down and dug her phone out of her purse. "I can call Quinn and tell her that--"

"NO!" Kurt and Blaine yelled simultaneously.

Rachel jumped and Kurt continued, more calmly, "You and Quinn have been trying to find a good weekend to get together since she got to Yale. I promise we'll be fine."

Rachel hesitated, "I don't know..."

Kurt stood up and focused intently on walking in a straight line, picking up Rachel's bag and escorting her to the door. "You don't need to worry about us. We've been eating lots of bread--"

"And cheese, and grapes, and olives," Blaine counted them off on his fingers.

"Point being," Kurt opened the sliding door, "the food will ap...ap? absorb," Kurt enunciated slowly, "the alcohol. We'll be fine." Kurt handed her bag over and kissed her on the cheek.

Rachel side-eyed Kurt, but acquiesced. "I'll see you Sunday night."

"Bye." Kurt slid the door closed and turned around to an armful of Blaine.

"I thought she'd never leave." Blaine pressed Kurt up against the wall and began licking and sucking his way up Kurt's neck.

Kurt ran his hands down Blaine's back and groped his ass. Blaine began grinding against him and Kurt gasped. "Wait, wait. I have to pee."

Blaine ran his hand down to rub along the seam of Kurt's pants, cupping his hands around the hardness he found. "Please don't make me wait any longer," Blaine begged. "I've been half-hard since you picked me up at the airport." Blaine ran the heel of his hand down Kurt's erection. "I almost jumped you in the cab on the ride here." He popped open the button on Kurt's jeans and reached his hand inside, thumb making little circles around the outline of the head of Kurt's cock. "I almost killed Rachel when she changed her outfit for the third time." He brought his thumb up to his mouth and sucked away the precome that had leaked through Kurt's boxers.

"Oh god," Kurt exhaled and grabbed Blaine's face, kissing him roughly. He scrabbled with the buttons on Blaine's sweater, but gave up and just pulled it and the shirt underneath over his head.

Blaine wasn't so lucky and did have to undo all eight buttons on Kurt's shirt. The last two may have popped off and gone skittering across the floor as he lost patience. Kurt was too busy shimmying out of his jeans and underwear to notice. He then worked on undoing Blaine's belt and ridding him of the rest of his clothes.

Now totally nude, they came together again all teeth and tongues. Kurt backed Blaine towards their picnic spot on the floor and when they got there they both dropped to their knees. Kurt pushed Blaine onto his back and kissed his way down his body. He nosed at the smattering of hair on Blaine's chest and took one dusky nipple into his mouth, nipping and sucking at it.

Blaine squirmed underneath Kurt and pressed on his shoulders, trying to guide him lower, please lower.

Kurt couldn't continue until he had given Blaine's other nipple equal attention, but then he relented and continued his path down, down, past his belly button and finally nuzzling the hair at the base of Blaine's cock.

"Kurt, please." It was almost a cry.

Kurt took pity and licked a stripe from base to tip. Blaine thrust upward, bumping Kurt's nose. Kurt laughed and held Blaine down by his hips. Blaine whimpered, but submitted as Kurt's tongue circled the head of his cock. Blaine bit his lip and brought his hands up to grasp at his own hair to keep himself from using them to push Kurt down onto his cock.

Kurt cocked an eyebrow and smiled evilly. He taunted and teased, licking lightly, stroking with the loosest of fists, taking Blaine all the way into his mouth and then pulling back off, sucking only lightly at the head before starting all over again.

"Kurt, you're killing me here," Blaine whined.

"We wouldn't want that." Kurt smiled and reached for the picnic basket they'd shoved to the side when they fell to the ground. He rooted around until his hand curled around a small bottle of lube. He flipped the cap and drizzled some onto his fingers, reaching down between Blaine's legs and fingering his opening.

Blaine gasped at the coldness.

"Sorry."

"Don't care. Just unexpected. Lube in our picnic basket and all."

"I was hopeful." Kurt worked his fingers inside his man, first one and quickly moving to two.

"I'm good, I'm good. Just, please, now."

"You need to be patient." Kurt admonished. He removed his fingers and lightly licked over the opening before once again taking Blaine's cock into his mouth.

Blaine pulled at his own hair and let out a cry of frustration.

Kurt giggled a 'sorry' and realizing his bladder wouldn't hold out forever, decided to give Blaine what he was begging for. He slicked up his cock and pushed past the tight ring of muscle. Blaine reached up and pulled him down for a kiss, rocking his hips upwards until Kurt bottomed out. Kurt groaned into Blaine's mouth and pulled almost all of the way out before slamming back into him. He bit his way up Blaine's jaw and tangled his hands in his hair, tugging the curls free from their gel and exposing more of his neck.

Blaine wrapped his legs around Kurt's thighs and set a punishing rhythm, making up for two months of only Skype calls and his hand.

"Blaine, god, I'm not going to last long if you keep fucking yourself on my cock like that."

Blaine laughed. "You talk so dirty when you're drunk and horny."

"You love it." Kurt ground out as his rhythm started to falter.

"I love you." Blaine pulled Kurt down for another kiss then whispered in his ear. "And I love to feel your come inside me."

Kurt couldn't hold back any longer and held Blaine tight and still as he came.

Blaine felt Kurt's dick pulsing inside him and groaned as he was held motionless. He resisted the urge to reach down and jack himself off.

Kurt was still hard inside of Blaine, but for an entirely different reason. "Now I really have to pee." Kurt panted hard above him. He reached down to Blaine's cock but Blaine batted his hand away.

"Go now."

Kurt made to push away from Blaine, but Blaine gripped his arms. "No, I mean inside me."

Kurt stammered. "I--I don't even know if I can. Isn't that some kind of biological impossibility?"

"Please try." Blaine rutted up against Kurt. "I would come so hard."

"But it would be so messy."

"You can wash the blankets, Kurt, right?" Blaine whined.

"Yes," Kurt hesitated. "And I did put down a plastic shower curtain in case we spilled some wine.

Blaine wriggled underneath him and put on his best puppy dog eyes look.

Kurt crushed their lips together hungrily. "Okay, I'll try." He braced himself on his arms and closed his eyes.

Blaine rocked his hips in anticipation.

Kurt opened his eyes. "Don't move. I don't think I'll be able to do it at all if you move."

Blaine whimpered, but stilled.

Kurt grabbed Blaine's hand and placed it over his abdomen, pushing in. "Help me?" Kurt's hand moved to the base of his own cock.

Blaine pushed firmly on Kurt's bladder and heard Kurt give a sharp intake of breath.

Kurt closed his eyes again. "Harder."

Blaine complied and Kurt let out a small gasp and his head dropped forward as Blaine felt hot wetness coat his insides, mixing with the come already there. "Fuck Kurt, oh shit." Blaine brought his free hand to his cock and began jerking off. He could feel Kurt going soft inside him as his bladder emptied.

"I'm sorry," Kurt gasped as his dick slipped out.

Blaine felt the piss trickling out of his asshole and he clenched his muscles, trying to keep it inside. "Don't apologize," Blaine said. "That was so hot and I'm so close." He saw that Kurt was still holding his cock. "Do you still have to go?"

Kurt nodded.

"Piss on my dick," Blaine begged. "Please." He arched his back as he felt his orgasm cresting.

Kurt leaned over and Blaine felt the hot stream start at his balls and travel up his cock and over his hand. He fisted the blanket under him as he lurched up and his orgasm broke, come running over his fingers and mixing with Kurt's piss. As he came back down he grabbed Kurt around the neck and pulled him into a bruising kiss. Kurt collapsed on top of him and Blaine's muscles relaxed, the come and piss dribbling out of his ass.

Kurt broke the kiss and bit at Blaine's collarbone. "That was so hot, I don't even--" He ran his hand through the mess on Blaine's stomach and brought it up to his mouth and began to lick. "Salty." He locked eyes with Blaine. "I want to taste you."

"You are tast--" Blaine's eyes got wide as he realized what Kurt was asking. "Oh."

"Do you think you can?"

Blaine concentrated for a moment, his brain still fuzzy from his most awesome orgasm. "I guess so. How do you want me to...?

"Just...maybe...on your stomach? Then I could lick you."

Blaine's dick twitched in renewed interest, but he closed his eyes to concentrate, pointing his dick towards his stomach. At first, all he managed was a trickle. When he felt Kurt's tongue licking at the wetness on his belly, he relaxed more and the trickle turned to a steady stream. He opened his eyes and watched the piss land on his chest and run down through his chest hair. Kurt was watching in fascination, then running his hands through the stream and sucking the moisture off of his fingers. If he could, Blaine would have come again at the sight.

When he was finished, Kurt looked at him with hunger in his eyes and ran his hand through the mess of come and their piss on Blaine's stomach. He offered it up to Blaine for a taste and Blaine didn't hesitate to lick Kurt's hand clean. Kurt groaned and rubbed his hardening cock against Blaine's thigh. Blaine grabbed his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. As their bodies touched Kurt pulled back.

"We seriously need to move this to the bathroom."

"This?" Blaine chased Kurt's mouth.

"Yeah." Kurt stood up and reached down to pull up Blaine. "If we totally don't want to regret this once we're sober we need to throw these blankets in the tub, take a shower and then I need you to fuck me."

Blaine's eyes widened and his dick twitched in renewed interest as he scrambled to help Kurt gather up the blankets and followed him into the bathroom.