May 6, 2013, 8:26 a.m.
Just Friends
The One Where Everything Changes (and Some Things Never Change)
Kurt exhales. Reaction to 4x21 "Wonder-ful"
K - Words: 565 - Last Updated: May 06, 2013 1,057 0 0 0 Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, Tags: established relationship,
That first week home seems to fly by. Kurt spends his time hanging out in the choir room and at the Lima Bean, acting as if nothing is out of the ordinary. But the truth is, everything has changed. Then again, everything is the same.
He shuffles the sugar packets, vaguely registering the conversation around him, but he can't stop thinking about his dad. What if the cancer has spread? What if he's still sick? What if he....?
The rustle of the thick paper of the sugar packets soothes his nerves. He organizes them in neat rows and lines up their edges. When they're all facing the same direction, he begins to notice bits and pieces of Mercedes' voice seeping back in. He looks up and sees Blaine's deep, amber eyes. There is concern there but no judgment.
It hurts.
Why does it hurt?
For the past eight months, it's felt weird not to have Kurt back in the choir room, but it feels even stranger to have him here but just out of reach.
Kurt is happy about his father's clean bill of health and that makes Blaine happy, but it's still not quite right. There's something missing. Something true.
Blaine smiles as Kurt sings to his dad, and it hits him. He wants to be a part of that family. He craves it in a way he'd only just sort of felt on the periphery until now. He wants to call Burt dad, and say, "this is Finn, my brother-in-law." And now he can. Well once he moves to New York, but that's just geography.
He looks at Kurt and smiles — this beautiful boy of his who's become a man while he was gone — and his heart aches. It aches because Kurt is smiling easily. His anxiety from earlier in the week has begun to fade away. He's Kurt again.
Blaine glances at Burt and knows. He has to ask.
It's time.
Why does it hurt?
Blaine grabs Kurt's arm and leads him down to their hallway. There's not a marker or anything to prove that it's theirs — even the bulletin board's contents change every month — but a lot has happened there. So Kurt's always come to think of it as that.
Besides, it's sure beats the "locker where Karofsky bruised my shoulder" or the "bathroom sink I used to get the slushy out of my hair."
Blaine looks so nervous. He's practically shaking, and Kurt wonders what it could be that has him so riled up, and then it hits him.
He's seen that look on Blaine's face before.
Blaine takes a deep breath. He wants to ask him. He has to ask him. Kurt's face is all excitement and anticipation. He can do this.
He remembers how just a little over a year ago they stood in this exact spot and Kurt thought he was giving him an engagement ring.
Kurt will say yes, he thinks. He'll say yes and we'll get married and it will be perfect. But then it hits him. He's standing in front of Kurt at the end of their hallway, and it just becomes too much.
What if he says no?
Kurt inhales, unsure if he heard Blaine correctly.
Regionals? Really? Is that all?
Blaine smiles expectantly. There's something he's not saying, but Kurt lets it go. He threads his arm through Blaine's and smiles back at him.
"A wonderful, wonderful week," he says.
"With you in it, a wonderful life."
Kurt exhales. It's enough for now.