When Blaine first joined the circus, he was barely fourteen and had run away from his family, sick of his father’s judgmental glares and his mother’s coldness. Back then he had only one talent-singing. At first, they made him sing soft songs when Santana and Brittany were flying high above the spectators’ heads and fast and rhythmic ones when Finn and Puck were throwing cakes at each other and playing idiots.

Then, Nick began to teach him how to juggle, because he needed a partner and even though he loved Jeff dearly he couldn’t deny that he was absolutely helpless when it came to catching even a single ball. Moreover, the fact that Blaine could sing while juggling made their number spectacular in his opinion.

The first time he laid his eyes on Kurt Hummel, he dropped every single ball he was juggling.

When Kurt walked inside the circus tent, head held high and skin pale and clear as snow, and Blaine had to remind himself how to breathe as the balls he had been juggling fell to the ground and rolled away.

“Earth to Blaine!”

Reluctantly he averted his gaze from the boy who was now talking with Will, the circus manager, to look at Nick.

“What?”

“Like what you see?”

Blaine felt his cheeks heat up and his heart beat faster, slamming against his ribcage; he flinched when Nick’s hand came up to his shoulder, muscle memory gained after all the shoves and insults he had received back at home.

“Jeez, Blaine, calm down.”

“I…”

“You are safe here.”

Blaine blinked and lifted his gaze to meet Nick’s eyes, trying to assess if he meant it. Nick sighed and squeezed his shoulder a bit firmer.

“I am the same as you, you know? And here it’s perfectly fine to be who you are.”

The tension left his body, leaving his muscles loose and his heart unbelievably light. Catching his reaction, Nick grinned.

“Isn’t he pretty?”

Blaine didn’t have to ask whom he was referring to.

“He is.”

Before he could add anything, Jeff came barreling into him, eyes alight with excitement.

“His name is Kurt, or so Tina told me and, wait for it, he is a contortionist!”

Blaine did turn then and he was sure his whole body wasn’t going to move anymore. The boy, Kurt, was curled up on himself, hands flat against the earth and spine twisted so that his legs were bent right in front of his beautiful and focused face.

A rush of warmth splashed over him as his eyes roamed without permission over the planes and curves of Kurt’s body, strong and lean and Blaine had the feeling that he had dreamt of this boy all along. That this boy whose body seemed liquid like water was the one who had dwelled in his dreams since he had discovered that he wanted to kiss and hold hands with boys.

He was still trying to regain control, when Kurt’s gaze lifted under stray light brown bangs. His eyes seemed to glint in the half-light of the tent, an iridescent color that Blaine didn’t manage to catch fully. When the left corner of Kurt’s mouth quirked in a knowing half smile, something stuttered embarrassed inside of Blaine and he forced himself to turn and quickly reach the exit, leaving Nick and Jeff behind.

*

Blaine didn’t see Kurt for the rest of the day, busy preparing himself for the evening show and convincing himself that it would be easy to keep at bay the heat simmering underneath his skin at the mere thought of Kurt’s lean muscles.

When the show began, though, he realized that was going to be impossible. Kurt, wearing only a thin leotard the color of the night sky, gracefully twisted and bent his body, his limbs drawing unknown lines, impossibly beautiful. Blaine could feel his palms tingle with the sheer desire to touch, to press his fingertips over those smooth curves, marking the surely smooth skin.

If his voice quivered a bit as he sang, clubs flying high above his head, his fingers sure and firm while his core was melting at the thought that Kurt might be watching him too, he hoped no one noticed.

As he slipped backstage after having bowed to the audience, Kurt was there, all grace and firm body. For a moment Blaine didn’t know what to do, torn between the need to run and the need to reach out and ask Kurt to, please, let himself be touched.

But then Kurt took a step forward and smiled, warm and sensual like spicy wine. His voice was a little breathless when he spoke.

“You have a really nice voice.”

Blaine blinked, taken aback by the compliment and feeling oddly touched at the same time.

“T-Thank you. You…you were amazing.”

Kurt ducked his head, a faint blush coloring his cheeks, and something contracted inside of Blaine at the sight. How was such a creature even real? And he burned with the need to be closer to him, as he had never done for any other boy before, not even in his dreams.

“That’s very kind of you…”

“Blaine.”

Kurt’s small smile easily was the most beautiful thing Blaine had ever seen. Kurt opened his mouth to speak, but applause rolled over them from behind the curtains and he quickly pressed his lips together. Blaine wanted to hear his voice, though, wanted to be closer so that he could give a name to the color of Kurt’s eyes.

“So, um. The show is almost finished. Would you like to go outside?”

Kurt looked at him intently for a few moments before nodding.

*

They walked down a path that led to the fields. The moon was high in the dark sky, the air calm and all that Blaine could hear were crickets in the distance and Kurt’s breath as they walked in silence side by side.

“So, first time in a circus?”

It was lame, Blaine knew that, but he certainly couldn’t voice what he was actually thinking- how are you even real? I don’t know why but the first thing I thought when I saw you was that I wanted to be closer to you. I want to hold you.

Kurt shook his head.

“My parents were circus artists, my mum was a trapezist and my dad was a mime . My dad and I travelled all across the country.”

Blaine turned to look at Kurt, taking in the way his jaw was set, his eyes suddenly a bit harder. It took him by surprise how much he wanted to know what was wrong in order to fix it.

“That’s why you are so good, then.”

Kurt shrugged, even though Blaine didn’t miss the way his eyes crinkled a bit at the corners.

*

They sat under a solitary willow beside a small stream; Kurt’s firm thigh was pressed against his and making it hard for Blaine to concentrate on what he was saying. He stared at the moon through the leaves. Words seemed too complicated.

Kurt’s voice cut through the night air, fresh like spring, heavy with promises.

“You can kiss me if you want to, you know?”

Blaine’s whole body seemed to stop working as his brain frantically tried to catch up with what Kurt had just said.

Turning to look at Kurt his breath itched as he realized how suddenly close they were. Kurt’s eyes were like liquid silver, drawing him in.

“W-what…”

Kurt tilted his head to the side.

“Kiss me; you know you want to.”

Blaine felt himself nod through the blanket of dizziness that Kurt’s proximity seemed to have draped over him.

He had never kissed, or been kissed by, anyone before; he had fantasized about it, of course, but never quite managed to imagine fully how it would be like, how it would taste. With Kurt’s lips pressing softly against his own, nerves ignited, he simply thought it was the best thing in the whole world.

Following Kurt’s lead, he hesitantly began to move his lips. His heart almost burst open when the tip of Kurt’s tongue wetly caressed his lower lip.

Kurt remained close when they broke the kiss to breathe, his lips brushing against Blaine’s as he spoke.

“Have…have you ever touched another boy?”

Blaine swallowed dry, a hot knot growing and growing in his lower stomach.

“No. I…I want to touch you, though. Can…can I?”

Kurt brushed his nose against his and Blaine’s breath stuttered because of the simple intimacy of the gesture.

“Yes.”

*

The tall grass brushed against the bare skin of his thighs as they trembled under Kurt’s soft touch. It was overwhelming to let someone touch him like this, see him like this, completely exposed and needing.

His breath caught in his throat when Kurt trailed his fingertips over the head of his cock, feather light and yet enough to send liquid fire twirling around inside of him.

“Kurt…”

It was barely a whisper, soon lost in the soft sound of the leaves rustling in the wind, but Kurt lifted his gaze, careful and attentive.

“Is this alright?”

Blaine couldn’t find the words and simply nodded; Kurt’s smile seemed to ignite the night and Blaine wished he could keep drinking it in but as Kurt’s fingers curled tighter around him he couldn’t help shutting his eyes closed.

He felt Kurt leaning closer, until his soft lips brushed against the shell of his ear.

“Feels good, right?”

His voice was so much lower and hoarser now and it sent dark shivers spiraling down Blaine’s bones. When Kurt flicked his wrist just so, Blaine didn’t even try to prevent the moan that rose from somewhere deep inside of him.

“It…it does.”

Kurt was trailing soft kisses down the curve of his neck, his breath coming in fast, wet puffs against his skin; the desire to touch him, to feel him in his hands, solid and warm, exploded inside of Blaine like a firework. Hesitantly, he trailed his hand down Kurt’s spine, his fingers sliding easily over the smooth fabric of the leotard. Kurt arched into his touch, muscles rippling.

“K-Kurt, can…can I touch you now?”

Kurt pulled back slightly, his hand still moving, making white heat pool at the end of Blaine’s spine.

“Yes.”

It was just a word, one simple word, yet to Blaine it felt as though Kurt had just dropped the world’s greater treasure right into his hands. Hoping he was doing the right thing, he let his hand slide across Kurt’s side and down the plane of his stomach until it met his cock, firm and hard underneath the dark blue fabric of his briefs. Sparks crawling from his fingertips up his arm, Blaine had to take a deep breath in order to control the spike of pleasure rushing through him.

“H-how…”

Kurt pressed a soft, almost chaste, kiss to his lips before pulling away and standing. Despite the coldness he felt at the lack of contact, Blaine remained still, mesmerized by Kurt’s figure, almost ethereal in the moonlight. He watched as Kurt slowly removed the leotard, his heart thrumming more and more with every inch of skin that was uncovered. When finally Kurt stood in front of him, naked and perfect against the dark canopy of leaves surrounding them, for a brief moment Blaine wondered if all of this was real, but then Kurt was kneeling on the grass in front of him and the only thing that made sense was reaching for him.

Blaine couldn’t prevent the moan that stumbled past his lips as his fingers slid over warm skin, no barrier left between his skin and Kurt’s warmth. He kept his eyes locked with Kurt’s as he trailed his hand lower, his fingers trembling slightly when they skirted over curly hair.

Kurt cupped his cheek gently and Blaine instinctively leaned into the touch, his eyes searching Kurt’s for directions. The other boy simply smiled, soft and sweet and encouraging; Blaine smiled back without even thinking about it. It felt safe, right, to be like this with Kurt, skin on skin, energy thrumming in the space between their bodies.

Kurt reached out and resumed stroking him, firm but gentle, and Blaine tried to mirror his movements, wanting nothing more than making Kurt feel as he was feeling- lighter than a balloon, floating in a place where everything was bright and a soft hue of azure-grey, like the sky before dawn, like Kurt’s eyes.

The sound of the wind through the leaves, of the crickets, of the world disappeared under their labored breaths and the small sounds escaping from Kurt’s lips, each one of them depositing deep inside of Blaine until he was filled to the brim and shaking with the need to burst open.

As if sensing it, Kurt leaned in, his lips brushing against Blaine’s.

“Let it go, Blaine. Let me see you.”

Blaine felt his eyes grow wide, breath getting lost somewhere in his lungs and all he could feel were Kurt’s fingers, strong and fast around him. He came with a shocked cry, heart hammering against his ribcage and Kurt’s name sweet on his tongue.

Gulping down air, he realized he needed to kiss Kurt so much that it hurt, so he leaned forward, leveling his free hand on Kurt’s toned thigh and swallowing the surprised sound Kurt made. As he deepened the kiss, Kurt covered Blaine’s hand with his and gently pressed it against Blaine’s stomach, gathering the come that had landed there, before guiding it back around his cock. Blaine eagerly slipped his tongue past Kurt’s lips, as his hand followed Kurt’s directions.

When Kurt came he was whispering Blaine’s name like a prayer, his eyes wide open and deep like the sky, and Blaine felt like he owned the whole world, having this amazing boy right there, trembling in his hands, coming apart because of him. Kissing Kurt one more time, he couldn’t help hoping that he could reach also Kurt’s heart.

*

For a while they lay under the willow, Blaine half-dressed and Kurt naked, pressed against his side, eyes focused on the leaves above them.

Blaine wanted to say so many things- I am glad you were the first one to touch me like this; let me know you; let me learn how to love you. But Kurt was still a mystery and Blaine, even though he wanted nothing more to trust him with his scarred heart, didn’t say anything.

He shyly took his hand, though, and when Kurt twined their fingers together in the warm space between their bare thighs, Blaine simply smiled at the moon blinking down at them through the branches, thinking that maybe the most beautiful things in the world could exist in the space between their palms one day.

The end