May 12, 2012, 12:12 a.m.
Above It All
"So...." and he gulps at the tone of your voice. "What's this I hear about you and Kurt being 'on the rocks?" "He said that?" His voice is so small and stricken that you can't even find it in you to be mad. "Hey, now, come on - I'm not mad yet." BURT/BLAINE
K - Words: 1,020 - Last Updated: May 12, 2012 1,122 0 0 1 Characters: Blaine Anderson, Burt Hummel, Tags: hurt/comfort,
"Hey, uh, Mr Hummel-"
"Burt, kid,"
"-sure, uh, Burt, is … is Kurt in?" You almost chuckle at how terrified he looks, but then you realise it's just because you've done your job right.
"Look, kid, he's over at Rachel's right now-" and you see his eyes fall, "but why don't you come in anyway?" You do chuckle this time when his face fills with confusion and more than a tinge of fear. You wonder what it must be like to have such an expressive face; to have all your emotions written out like that for the world to read.
"Um, okay …" he mutters, warily, so you step aside to allow him in, closing the door behind him. Ushering him into the kitchen, you gesture for him to take a seat.
"So…" and he gulps at the tone of your voice. "What's this I hear about you and Kurt being 'on the rocks'?"
"He said that?" and his voice is so small and stricken that you can't even find it in you to be mad.
"Hey, now, come on – I'm not mad yet. I'm just confused. I mean, you guys have always been so … good for each other. But I know Kurt can be a little … so why don't you tell me what happened?"
"I don't know … I mean I -"
"Just start at the beginning, kiddo."
And he did. He told the whole story. He started from the shock realisation that Kurt would be moving to New York an whole year before him. Well, of course he'd always known that, but they'd tried to push it to the backs of their minds and just enjoy the time they had. You'd been all ready to blow your top at this kid for whatever he'd done to get to Kurt, but here he was, trembling, telling you that he was just so terrified of being alone, and you felt your heart break a little.
"And so, you know, I was just trying to keep a little distance between us, just so … so it wouldn't hurt so much when …" the hitch in his throat choked him off, and he had to wait a minute before continuing, eyes determinedly fixed on the table in front of him. "But he … I didn't realise it was so … well he met this guy at the music store and … well, obviously, he was all over Kurt, and he kept texting him flirty little messages … and Kurt … he was enjoying it-" upon hearing your sharp intake of breath, his eyes jolted up like a deer caught in headlights. "Oh, I didn't mean … I wasn't implying he …"
"It's okay, kid. Keep going. I want to hear it all."
"He didn't do anything, per se, and maybe I overreacted a little, but I saw the texts and this guy was making plans to go live in New York with him, and Kurt was just going along with it, and it just hurt. Oh my god, it hurt so bad. And … and he said it was because he liked the attention. Because I hadn't been giving it to him lately. And I just … I don't know what to do." And then he just sat there, staring dejectedly at his hands. You took a deep breath, noticing how he cringed as you did so, as if expecting your words to feel like blows.
"Hey, it's alright. Blaine. Look at me. It's okay." And his big, wet eyes blinking up at you did funny things to your insides. "Look here, Kurt's a good kid-"
"I know he is, sir – he's the best!" You purse your lips to hide your smile, and try to look peeved at his interruption. Satisfied when his cheeks redden, you carry on.
"It's the whole New York thing. He wants it so bad – he's so focussed on what he's going to get out there, that sometimes he can forget what he's got back here. Who he's got back here. He loves you, kid. I know he does. And he loves me too, but-" you see his oddly geometric eyebrows furrow and he looks up at you, questioningly. "Oh, he just … he just got a little snippy when we were sorting out his stuff – what he's going to take and leave behind and stuff…" and you consider leaving it there, but it shocks you how nice it feels to talk about it with someone. Someone who, despite the age difference, understands exactly how you feel. "It's hard, you know? It's hard letting go. I know you feel the same. And I'm sure he does too, but he's got so much to look forward to that it overshadows it a bit, but for us – we're just left behind." He nods his head, slowly, not afraid to make eye contact with you now. "And he may act like he's above it all, but you know as well as I do that he's hurting right now. Normally if he'd had an argument with one of us, he'd go to the other for support. Right now he's got no one. I mean, he's at Rachel's house, but I doubt she'll be very helpful …" and you both wince simultaneously.
You walk round behind him and pat him on the back. "It'll be alright, kiddo. You'll see. We just need to talk to him. He'll come home, we'll talk it out, and we'll all be fine. All three of us."
"But … what about when … what about next year? How-"
"We'll grit our teeth and bear it. That's how we're going to get through. That's all we can do. And we will, because we won't stop loving him." And you see the corner of his mouth twitch up. "I- this may seem a bit … I mean, you're welcome to come and stay here. If you want. Just so … you're not alone … I mean, I know you're parents are …"
"Yeah. Thanks. That means a lot to me … Burt." He smiles tentatively, and your answering one is dazzling.
"Come on – Kurt might be a while, so let's wait it out. There's a Buckeyes game on …"
"I'll make sandwiches!"
"I knew there was a reason Kurt kept you around!"