"I'm gonna miss you," Blaine whispered as he nuzzled his head into his boyfriend's shoulder. Kurt was leaving for New York in a few days, and the time seemed to be slipping through their fingers faster than he cared to think about.

            "I'll miss you too, Blaine." Kurt nudged his nose against Blaine's cheek before stepping back from the hug. "I'll miss you so much."

            They stared at each other for a few silent seconds before Kurt sighed deeply. "Blaine, I need to talk to you about something."

            "Anything."

            "This... this is not going to work." 

Car is parked, bags are packed

But what kind of heart doesn't look back

At the comfortable glow from the porch

The one I will still call yours.

            The air seemed to disappear from the room entirely. Blaine's heart began thumping uncomfortably as Kurt's voice seemed to grow further and further away.

            "I love you so much. But I'm moving to another state and you're going into your senior year. Blaine, I don't want to hold you back from the things you should be experiencing here."

            "You mean you don't want me to hold you back from your New York dreams." This could not be happening.

            "Don't say that."

            "Why not? It's true. Kurt, I just... I don't understand."

            "I don't want to do a long-distance relationship, Blaine. It hurts too much. The thought of being so far away from you, not being able to see you... I can't handle that. I just think it'd be easier to..."

Blaine laughed shortly, cutting Kurt off before he could finish his thought.

            "Easy? You think this is the easy way out, Kurt? To break my heart and leave me here alone in this piece of shit town?"

            "That's not what I'm saying. There's nothing easy about this. I want you to be able to do whatever you want and talk to whomever you want, Blaine. It's your senior year. You should be having fun, not pining over a boyfriend who lives six hundred miles away."

            "I don't want to talk to anyone else. I don't want to do anything that doesn't involve you. Don't you get that? I'm yours, Kurt. Only yours"

            "I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say. I'm so sorry." 

All those words came undone,

And now I'm not the only one

Facing the ghost that decide

If the fire inside still burns

            "Get out." Blaine had barely whispered the words, but they sounded uncomfortable loud in the quiet room.

            "Blaine, please, I want to talk about this."

            "There's nothing to talk about. You're breaking up with me. That's it. We're done. You need to get out."

            "I still love you. I want to be friends." Kurt was at a complete loss. He wasn't sure how he'd expected Blaine to react, but this wasn't it.

            "You want to be friends? I can't be friends with you." Blaine stared at Kurt incredulously. It was finally beginning to sink in. "I can't give you anything unless I'm giving you everything, Kurt. I don't want to be friends with you."

            Kurt reached for Blaine's hand, but he jerked it out of reach.

            "Don't touch me." Blaine's hysteria was beginning to become apparent as everything crashed down around him. "I hate you."

            "What?"

            "I hate you!" he screamed. "Get out, Kurt. I don't want to look at you anymore. Just go."

            Kurt stood there for a minute, trying to decide what he could say to make the situation better, to make it not so absolutely gut-wrenchingly terrible. But there was nothing he could say. He hadn't even started his car's engine before Blaine came running down the driveway.

            "Kurt, don't go. I didn't mean it. Please don't go. We can make this work." There was no point in trying to hide it, he had nothing left to lose.

            "I am so sorry."

            It was the last thing Kurt said to Blaine before he drove away.

All I have, all I need

He's the air I would kill to breathe

Holds my love in his hands

Still I'm searching for something

Out of breath, I am left

Hoping someday I'll breathe again 

            It hurt to breathe. It hurt to take the conscious effort to do the most mundane things. Waking up in the morning simply brought Blaine back into a world where Kurt was no longer his. He stopped answering his phone once he realized the news of the breakup had spread to his friends.

            He didn't want to hear their comforting words. He didn't want to listen to them tell him it would be okay. Nothing would be okay. Kurt was leaving and he wasn't coming back - at least not for Blaine.

            All he could think about was what he could do to fix it, to make Kurt realize that their love was strong enough to resist the problems that came with being so far away from each other. He didn't know what else he could give Kurt that he hadn't already given him long ago.

            He felt strange in his own body without Kurt there to make him feel whole.

Open up, next to you

And my secrets become your truth

And the distance between that was sheltering me

Comes in full view 

            The day Kurt left for New York was the worst day of Blaine's life. It somehow made everything even more real. Part of Blaine was hoping that Kurt was going to bust through his door, say that he'd made a mistake. Instead, he didn't even get to say goodbye.

            He used to believe that their love was some kind of fairy tale romance; that they had been brought together by fate at exactly the right moment. When both felt that they couldn't go another day in their own lives, they found each other and suddenly everything was perfect.

            Blaine had forgotten what it felt like to question his own worth, because when he was with Kurt, he finally felt like he deserved love.

Hang my head, break my heart

Built from all I have torn apart

And my burden to bear

Is a love I can't carry, anymore 

            "Blaine, pick up the phone. Your friend Tina called me. They're all really worried about you, and so am I. If you don't call me back by tonight, I'm getting on a plane to Ohio."

            Blaine listened to Cooper's voicemail three times before the words finally sunk in. He clicked his brother's name and let the dull ring of the phone echo through his head. Everything felt empty.

            "Squirt?" His brother's voice sounded relieved. Blaine felt a twinge of regret. He wasn't trying to drag his family and friends down with him. He just didn't have enough energy to put on a happy face and pretend that he was okay.

            "Yeah, Coop. I'm here."

            There were a few moments of silence before his brother finally asked the question that Blaine had been avoiding since Kurt walked out.

            "What happened?"

All I have, all I need

He's the air I would kill to breathe

Holds my love in his hands

Still I'm searching for something

Out of breath, I am left

Hoping someday I'll breathe again

            He could only get out a few sentences at a time before he would break down all over again. It took three hours for Blaine to let out everything he'd been holding back, but Cooper waited patiently.

            "He'll come around, Blaine."

            "No, Cooper. I think this is it. He's not coming back. When Kurt makes a decision, he sticks to it. It's over."

            "I'm so sorry. Do you want me to come home? I have a break from filming next week. I can come-" Blaine cut him off quickly. Though he'd taken the first step by opening up to his brother, he wasn't ready to face anyone yet.

            "No, don't come home. I need to sort this out alone."

            "Okay. Just promise you'll call me if you need anything, all right? I'm never too busy for you, I hope you know that."

            "I do. Bye, Cooper."

It hurts to be here,

I only wanted love from you

It hurts to be here,

What am I gonna do? 

            Blaine's first day back at school brought a whole new torture that he hadn't anticipated. The wary glances from his friends, the whispered conversations they seemed to think he couldn't hear. It all reminded him of the very thing he was trying to push out of his mind

            Everyone was worried about him, and he knew that he hadn't given them any comfort with the way he'd been acting. He wasn't himself. He didn't go to Glee Club until the second week back, when Mr. Schue threatened to fail him out of Spanish if he didn't show up at Booty Camp.

            It didn't feel right to continue with his life as he had before, as if nothing had changed. In reality, he wasn't even sure who he was anymore.

All I have, all I need

He's the air I would kill to breathe

Holds my love in his hands

Still I'm searching for something

Out of breath, I am left

Hoping someday I'll breathe again 

            It took four months and seventeen days before Blaine woke up without feeling like there was a giant hole in the center of his chest.

            He woke up feeling not quite hopeful, but at the very least, not as horribly depressed as he'd been since the day Kurt broke up with him.

            He couldn't say he was better, but he knew that he was at least on his way. He took a deep breath, preparing himself for the long day that lay ahead before climbing out of bed.

He was starting over.

I'll breathe again