By Saturday, Velocity was meeting to practice twice per day, getting song choice, choreography, lighting and costumes down. Kurt still had no idea what to sing for a solo and honestly didn't have it in him to care. Rachel was shocked knowing he usually enjoyed being the center of attention. She offered to do a duet with him and he agreed, so they began practicing for that. Between practices, different members of Velocity would call, text, or meet to discuss their worry over Kurt. He was a slim man to start with but when he'd pulled his sweater off the previous day, his ribcage had been very prominent, pushing against his pale skin. Those who had seen had shared a shocked look, including Blaine.

When asked if he was eating, Kurt just shrugged it off and told them he ate when he felt like it. He didn't tell anyone he spent the nights in tears and he couldn't seem to keep any food down. Looking in the mirror, seeing the love bites and hickeys gave him mixed emotions. He loved them because they were from the man he would always love. They also upset him because that had led to the wondrous intimacy they'd shared and then to the words and the blow that had torn it all apart. He'd been so sore after that night, but he would've cherished ever tender step if Blaine had shown him the least amount of caring. But that wasn't to be. Blaine's actions had taken a beautiful sexual experience and turned it into something ugly. Kurt hadn't made the conscious decision to give the engagement ring back until he'd actually done it. Hell, he didn't even know if Blaine would remember what it was, he'd only seen it the one time at the hospital right after he'd woken up. But seeing him standing there, unconsciously rubbing his sore knuckles, the very knuckles that had bruised Kurt's face, he realized he couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't sit by and hope and hope and hope that Blaine would get his memory back or come around. It wasn't going to happen and that was crystal clear now. Yes, Blaine appeared to regret what he'd done, but Kurt's heart was beyond simple apologies. Sometimes he felt like he didn't have a heart anymore, he felt so empty. But the ache in his chest that was there day after day, every minute of the time he spent in Blaine's presence, told him otherwise. His heart was in there and it was shattered to tiny bits.

. . .

Blaine had been surprised to get the text from Miranda. He didn't think she would've contacted him again after that fateful party. But when she asked him out for coffee, he figured it would at least give him a chance to apologize in person.

She was sitting, waiting for him when he got to the café. Waving to her, he got in line to get a coffee before going to sit across from her. She had her brown hair pulled back into a pony tail and she gave him a friendly smile as a greeting.

"Miranda, I'm glad you texted. I am so sorry about that party. Some crazy stuff went down and I ended up leaving in a hurry," he said sincerely.

"No big deal, really. I had fun dancing with your friend, Puck. We actually went out the other night," she said, a twinkle in her eyes.

"Really? That's great," Blaine said, relieved.

"Yeah, he told me what happened that night. I pretty much figured out that it was probably information I didn't need to know." Blaine closed his eyes in mortification. Damn Puck straight to hell. "But, from the way he made everything sound, it didn't seem like you ended up with anyone you could talk to about the situation. So here I am. A friend, ready to listen and offer advice if I can," she said, smiling brightly.

Blaine sighed and returned her smile with a grateful one of his own. "You have no idea how much I could use someone to talk to. I'd been hoping to talk to my brother, but he had to leave last week for an audition in L.A. He's flying back out tomorrow and we're getting together, so that will help too. Geez, I don't even know where to start."

"Why don't you tell me what it was like to wake up from a coma," Miranda said kindly.

"It was kind of like waking up from anesthesia. Have you ever had surgery?" She nodded. "Then you know that heavy feeling that is over your body, seems to hold it down whether you want it to or not. It was like that. But I heard someone singing; it was beautiful really. Somehow it helped me win the battle over my mind and I kinda floated awake. I saw these two guys standing over me, looking at me like they cared, but I had no idea who they were. It got weird quick because the one guy, Kurt, was calling me baby and telling me he loved me. It freaked me out, bad. All I could hear in my head was gay, fag, homo, bad, unnatural, so I knew I couldn't trust this guy or believe anything he said." Blaine was being brutally honest and god bless her, Miranda just kept a compassionate look on her face between sips of coffee. "Then the other guy, Kurt's dad, says my fiancé had dragged himself out of bed to come be with me. I didn't see any girls around and then it kind of sunk in that they were talking about Kurt. That I had asked Kurt to marry me. I knew they had to be wrong. I'm not gay, I never have been. I feel awful because I insulted him like crazy, but he just kept on trying to tell me he loved me. My parents got there and I asked them if what Kurt said was true. They got furious and told me of course I wasn't gay. I'd had plenty of girlfriends over the years. My mother told me Kurt had been pretty much stalking me for years. And you can always believe your parents, right? So I did. I asked them to keep Kurt away from me. When I found out he and I were roommates, I wondered why I would be living with a guy who was stalking me, but I just went with it, thinking it had to do with saving money. Wes and David, my friends, helped move my stuff out of Kurt's apartment and into theirs. As time went on, it turned out that the only stuff I couldn't remember was Kurt and the memories with him or sexuality in it. It's been so bizarre, knowing this one thing is keeping me from knowing all there is to know about myself. God, I treated him like such shit at first. I shoved him once and all he'd said was that he wanted to help me get my memory back."

"Not that violence is okay, but you were under the impression this person was harmful," Miranda said gently.

"Yeah, but that's no excuse. Anyway, I started thinking about him a lot. I found out we'd been best friends for the past few years aside from any relationship we might have had. Again, this didn't coincide with what my folks told me, but it made missing him make sense. Eventually we started getting together for coffee, talking, texting, that kind of stuff. It was great, he's such a good guy. I could kind of tell he still liked me, but I was enjoying hanging out, so I didn't make a big deal out of it. That night at the party; I'm still sorry about that," Blaine said and Miranda waved for him to continue. "Anyway, we were drinking quite a bit and I saw Kurt dancing." He couldn't say anymore, his face was burning with shame.

"You found yourself attracted to him?" she asked, her face neutral.

"In a bad way. I couldn't seem to stop myself from dragging him into a bedroom. He was completely into it, too. Then when it was over, he told me he still loved me and would be with me if I wanted him to be. All I could hear were those negative thoughts again. I knew homosexuality was bad, a sin, something that goes against the way men and women were created. And here I'd just had sex with a guy, breaking the most cardinal rule. So when he told me he still wanted to be with me, I freaked out and I punched him." Blaine put his head down on his hands. "Oh god, I hit him so freakin' hard. My had was sore and red. The whole side of his face was swollen. I'd taken an intimate moment and threw it back in his face, treating him like trash."

"Did you enjoy the experience?" Miranda wanted to know.

Blaine didn't answer for a moment. Then his face burned and he nodded. "Very much so."

"You must have beat yourself up a lot over this," she said. "It's a very confusing situation."

"Yeah, but he didn't deserve any of what I did to him," he said, shaking his head in misery.

"No, he didn't. But it sounds like some people weren't honest with you from the start, since you woke up. You might want to think about hearing their side of the story."

He stared at her. "My parents? Why would they lie?" Though the exact same thoughts had entered his mind numerous times.

"Well, they don't exactly seem open to homosexuality," she said sardonically.

"But I don't feel like I'm gay. The thought still repulses me," he said, confused.

"Did Kurt repulse you when you were together?"

He thought back to those moments between them. Kurt's hot naked body writhing under his. The feel of his soft, smooth skin, the taste of his tongue in Blaine's mouth. Blaine's aching cock filling him up, thrusting into him until they were both crying from the sensations. He looked at her honestly. "Not even a bit."

"There you go then. I'd say talk with your brother and then talk to your folks. You need to get to the bottom of this," she said.

Blaine shook his head. "Why haven't I thought of this already?"

"Sometimes it takes someone else to see the obvious for you. Let me know how it turns out okay? Now I've gotta head out. I have a hot date with Puck and his sexy mohawk tonight and I need to get ready," Miranda said with a wiggle of her eyebrows.

Blaine stood and gave her a light hug, thanking her again. He couldn't be more grateful for her if he tried. Now he was looking forward to Coop's visit tomorrow. Hopefully, his brother wouldn't hide anything from him. Checking his watch, he realized he needed to get a move on. They were rehearsing one of the group numbers for the benefit in twenty minutes.

. . .

"Okay. Let's run through this one more time. Puck, stop messing with Sam's hair. I know everyone is tired and this is a long number, but if we can get through this one time, hitting all of the choreography and notes, we can consider this ready for the benefit. So, from the top," Mr. Schue said and cued the music. The heavy drum intro began and they all started to sway.

(Artie)

For those days we felt like a mistake,

Those times when loves what you hate,

Somehow, we keep marching on.

(Blaine)

For those nights when I couldn't be there,

I've made it harder to know that you know,

That somehow, we'll keep moving on.

(Kurt)

There's so many wars we fought,

There's so many things we're not,

But with what we have,

I promise you that,

(Group)

We're marching on,

We're marching on,

We're marching on.

(Puck and Artie)

For all of the plans we've made,

There isn't a flag I'd wave,

Don't care if we bend,

I'd sink us to swim,

(Group)

We're marching on,

We're marching on

We're marching on.

(Trent)

For those doubts that swirl all around us,

For those lives that tear at the seams,

We know, we're not what we've seen,

(Mike)

Oh, for this dance we'll move with each other.

There ain't no other step than one foot,

Right in front of the other.

(Kurt)

There's so many wars we fought,

There's so many things we're not,

But with what we have,

I promise you that,

(Group)

We're marching on,

We're marching on

We're marching on.

(Women)

For all of the plans we've made,

There isn't a flag I'd wave,

Don't care if we bend,

I'd sink us to swim,

(Group)

We're marching on,

We're marching on

We're marching on.

(Women)

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

(Men)

Right, right, right, right left right,

Right, right, right, right left right,

Right, right, we're marching on.

(Blaine)

We'll have the days we break,

And we'll have the scars to prove it,

We'll have the bonds that we save,

But we'll have the heart not to lose it.

With only the heavy thump of the drum backing them, Kurt looked between the dancing bodies at Blaine as he sang, tears streaming down his face. Blaine met his gaze, his golden eyes sparkling with unshed tears. They shared that moment and then it was over.

(Kurt)

For all of the times we've stopped,

For all of the things I'm not.

(Group)

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

(Sam)

We put one foot in front of the other,

We move like we ain't got no other,

We go when we go,

We're marching on, marching on

(Puck and Artie)

There's so many wars we fought,

There's so many things we're not,

But with what we have,

I promise you that,

(Group)

We're marching on,

We're marching on

We're marching on.

(Women)

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

(Men with Blaine vocalizing over)

Right, right, right, right left right,

Right, right, right, left, right,

Right, right, we're marching on.

(Group with no instruments)

Oh, oh, oh, oh

"Excellent job, everyone! That's it for the night. Rest those voices and drink plenty of water. I'm proud of you guys. That is going to be a spectacular number. We'll see you tomorrow afternoon at three, so don't be late. Good night!" Mr. Schue called.

Blaine had hoped to share another look or a quick word with Kurt, but he was already out the door before he was even able to get off the stage. He grabbed his bag and was walking by Mr. Schue and Lauren when he heard Kurt's name.

"Is he eating at all? He's looking really bad. I'm worried if he keeps this up, he'll need to go to the hospital. And selfishly, he wouldn't be able to participate in the benefit and we need his voice," Mr. Schue was saying.

"He's been under a lot of stress. I'll talk to him," Lauren said.

Blaine had noticed Kurt looking more and more pale. He wondered if he should say something to him or if it would just hurt things. Well, if Lauren was going to talk to him, she was more likely than anyone to get him to listen.

. . .

"Cooper, I'm so glad you could make it," Blaine said, hugging his brother before letting him in.

"How are you doing?" Cooper asked, walking in and sitting on the couch.

"I'm alright. You?" Blaine noticed his brother wasn't his usual jovial self. He looked, well, he looked pissed if he was honest with himself. This was not something he was used to from his brother. Especially because it looked to be aimed at him.

"I just saw Kurt," Cooper said.

"Oh," Blaine responded, sitting down heavily in a chair across from his brother. "How did he look?"

"You see him every day at practice. How do you think he looks? He's exhausted, starving, and depressed. What the hell have you done to that boy?" Cooper demanded, his blue eyes flashing angrily.

"Cooper, I've tried talking to him, tried singing to him. I don't know what else to do," Blaine told him, frustrated.

"Yeah, and you hit him, too, I saw. I heard Kurt's version of the story and I want yours. Now," Cooper said, his tone brooking no argument.

Blaine was as honest as he'd been with Miranda, so desperate for his brother's advice that he would put up with the embarrassment and shame he was sure Coop would have with him. When he was done, Cooper just stared at him.

"You really are the stupid son, aren't you?" Cooper said.

"It wouldn't surprise me. Coop, can you tell me what life was like before the accident? What was I like? How did I act around Kurt? I need to know the truth," he pleaded.

"No matter what you end up hearing?" Cooper wanted to know.

"No matter what," Blaine agreed.

"Alright. Well, you two met at Dalton Academy. It took a few months for you to get your head out of your ass - seems like that's a theme with you - and ask him out, but you finally did. You two were together every day since. There wasn't a single day where you didn't at least talk on the phone. To be honest, I'd never seen you so happy. And after I finally met the little squirt, I understood. Kurt has always been the sweetest, most compassionate and selfless person I've known. He brought out the best in you and you brought out the courage in him. Two halves of a whole," Cooper mused. "The day of the accident, you'd taken him out for a picnic and proposed to him, ring and all. Kurt was over the moon. Right after you told Mom and Dad about the engagement, you got in the wreck. You hit your head too hard and that's why you were in the coma." Cooper shrugged as he finished up.

"Wait a second. Why aren't you disgusted that I was in a gay relationship?" Blaine wanted to know.

Cooper looked at him, his head to the side. "Why would I be? You came out in your freshman year of high school. It's just who you are. I was happy for you when you met Kurt. You were so good together, so happy. Why wouldn't I be happy for both of you?"

"But when I woke up in the hospital and Kurt told me he loved me and I was his fiancé, I, god, Coop, I called him horrible names and got Mom and Dad to bar him from the room. They told me he'd been stalking me," he said, his voice fizzling out at the red fury spreading across Cooper's face.

"Blaine Everett Anderson, were you born with a dunce cap on? Jesus. Mom and Dad have hated that you were gay your entire life. The day you called and told them about your engagement to Kurt, they said a ton of ugly stuff to both of you. Called you fags, homos, told you how unnatural you both were, how it was against the natural order of things," Cooper said, pausing at the question in Blaine's expression.

"But why did I wake up hating gays? I was absolutely repulsed by Kurt and everything about him until I started to dream about him," he said, needing an answer.

Cooper quickly shared his theory about the last thing he'd heard before the coma somehow affecting his subconscious. How maybe he'd let his parents words get to him more than he should have. "I don't know if it's possible. But it makes the most sense. And then to have them confirm what you woke up believing... It was perfect for them. They suddenly got to have the straight son they'd always wanted."

"You mean all of this could be from them just hating me so much? Hating who I am?" Blaine's eyes began watering. "It's not fair! I had this whole other life that I was apparently happy in. Now I'm alone and miserable and dealing with all this shame and desires that feel so fucking wrong," he said and broke down. Cooper came to him and wrapped his arms around him, rocking him back and forth like a child. "But if this is who I am, if I'm gay, why do I still feel all of this shame and embarrassment? I'm admitting to myself that I care about Kurt, but I still feel like it's all wrong," Blaine sobbed.

"I don't know. I think that's just something you're going to have to work through," Cooper said, rubbing his back. Blaine didn't stop crying for a long while, all the anger, loss, and frustration finally getting an outlet.

When he came back from washing his face in the bathroom a while later, his hurt had turned to fury. "You know I have to confront them, don't you?"

"I'd think you were an even bigger idiot if you didn't," Cooper said with a grin.

"Do you mind being here while I call them? To back me up, so they can't lie to me again? I would appreciate it," Blaine said, recognizing that he needed his brother.

"I've got your back," Cooper smiled.

Blaine dialed his parents and put them on speaker phone. He had no idea how similarly it looked to the night of the engagement.

"Hi Blaine! How are you, sweetie?" His mom asked, all pleasantness. Cooper was shaking his head in disgust.

"I'm alright. Hey is Dad around, I'd like to talk to both of you," Blaine said evenly.

"Sure thing!"

A moment later, his dad came on. "Hey there, son! What's new? Have you seen that Miranda gal again? It sounded like you two hit it off pretty well. We'll have to," his dad said, but Blaine interrupted him.

"Why did you and Mom lie to me?"

"What?" Nora asked, her voice bewildered.

"What would we have to lie to you about, son?" Evan asked, still sounding cheerful.

"That's bullshit, and we all know it. I'm gay," Blaine said and swallowed as his eyes went wide. He'd said it. He'd come out and said it. "I'm gay," he repeated. "I asked the man I loved to marry me and you two said horrible, awful things to both of us right before the accident. Then you lied when I woke up and told me I wasn't gay. Why the hell would you do that to me? Why would you do that to Kurt?" Blaine was yelling by this point, standing over the phone on the coffee table like it was his parents. Cooper grabbed his arm and sat him back down. "You gotta give them a chance to answer," he whispered.

"You woke up and said you weren't gay, Blaine, why would we contradict you? You told Kurt you weren't gay before we even got there. Why are you blaming us?" Evan said.

"Because you knew the truth! You knew I was born gay, that I came out at fourteen years old. That doesn't change just because of a coma. You had to know I was confused and affected by the accident. You could have told me the truth. Instead you let me be filled with anger and hate. And when I fell in love with Kurt again, I felt shame and degradation instead of joy like I should have been able to feel," he railed at them. Was he really in love with Kurt, he wondered? Yes, yes he was. The thought felt good, felt right. He grinned at Cooper who looked at him like he was nuts. Maybe he was, but he felt like he finally had a bead on who he was and what his heart wanted.

"Of course you should feel shame and degradation, homosexuality is a disgusting affront to society," Nora said, her tone arrogant.

"Not even close, Mom. You want to know what is a disgusting affront to society? To this world? Ignorance. Ignorance, prejudice, and people like you who would rather hate what is different than embrace it. Well, you don't need to worry about having a gay son," Blaine said.

"Oh thank god, so you're not going that route again?" Evan said gratefully.

"No. You don't need to worry because you no longer have a son. You no longer exist to me," Blaine said firmly.

"I'm gonna have to throw in on this one. I can't believe what you guys did to Blaine and Kurt and if you're willing to do that to them, what are you willing to do to me as soon as I do something you don't like? So, I'm out, too. Blaine and I will be just fine without either of you. We'll be able to find acceptance and love from people who matter, cuz it ain't you two," Cooper said, leaning over the phone with glee.

"Cooper? You've been there this whole time?" Nora screeched.

"Uh, yeah?" Coop grinned.

"Dammit boys, this is not going to fly. Now listen to me," their father said.

"Oh wait. Now, I do believe we just disowned you two and as such, we don't have to listen to a damn thing you say," Blaine said, sharing his brother's smile. "So, here's my final word on the matter," he finished and hit 'end' on the phone.

"Damn Blaine! You got balls that clang!" Cooper cried, giving him a high five.

Blaine grinned. "I feel so free. But, Coop, you didn't have to do it, too."

"Yeah, I did. Like I said to them, there was no telling what they were willing to do if they were okay with lying to their own son about who he is. I'm proud of you, Blaine. You did the right thing," Cooper said and hugged him. "Now you need to make it right with Kurt. I gotta head out, but I'll see you next week at the benefit."

Blaine saw his brother to the door and felt like he was soaring. He had an idea and hopefully he could get Velocity to cooperate with him. Pulling up the contacts on his phone, he started making calls.

. . .

Practice that afternoon was busy again, trying to get the biggest acts down since they'd only have weekday practices before next Saturday. Everyone seemed to be buzzing with energy. Kurt didn't understand it. All he wanted to do was sleep. As practice finally wound down, Kurt was sitting in a seat near the back, half dozing when he heard the microphone crackle. He opened his eyes and was startled to see the entire group on stage. He stood up, thinking he'd missed a cue.

Blaine was holding the microphone and gestured for him to sit down. "We've all been worried about you lately, and I can't help feeling responsible. Kurt, I've really screwed up. It seems like the only thing I've done since I woke up in the hospital was hurt you. I know one song can't fix it. Hell, a whole soundtrack couldn't fix it. But I hope this one might lift your spirits a little. This is from all the people who love you." He stood back and motioned to the band. As the music began, Blaine stood with Velocity swaying behind him, including Mr. Schue. Kurt sat with his eyes wide and took in the obvious show of affection from his friends. He refused to think of what it meant from Blaine.

(Lauren)

When you try your best, but you don't succeed

When you get what you want, but not what you need

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

(Blaine)

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone, but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

(Rachel and Blaine)

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

(Mercedes)

And high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

(Brittany and Blaine)

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

(Group)

Tears stream down on your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down on your face

And I...

As if the words had to come true, Kurt was overcome by the love his friends were showing and was weeping quietly. The beautiful sound coming from their combined voices gave him chills.

(Group)

Tears stream down on your face

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down on your face

And I...

(Blaine)

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

Kurt stood and applauded his friends, giving them a watery smile. "Thank you," he said.

The group slowly drifted from the stage and Kurt moved to grab his coat.

"Kurt? Can we talk? There are some things I need to tell you."

Kurt closed his eyes at the familiar voice. He was so tired. There was nothing more in him to give, to anyone.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, not even looking at Blaine. He just picked up his bag and walked away.