Sept. 4, 2013, 5:20 a.m.
Our Distance: Our Distance
T - Words: 2,718 - Last Updated: Sep 04, 2013 Story: Complete - Chapters: 19/19 - Created: Aug 07, 2012 - Updated: Sep 04, 2013 449 0 1 0 0
He couldn't wait to surprise Blaine the day of regionals. He was going back to Lima the day before and wasn't going to tell Blaine until Blaine saw him sitting in the audience at Regionals. He had to be there. He was always going to try and be there cheering his boyfriend on in the audition for everything and anything that he will do.
He never though he would say he missed Ohio. He missed it for three reasons; his family, his friends, and Blaine.
When he shut the door to his and Rachel's own little place, away from the city that never sleeps, he heard crying and then he heard a voice he hadn't heard in weeks, Finn. Kurt's feet were moving before his mind knew he was moving towards the living room.
"I am so sorry, Rachel. I never wanted to hurt you but this…you and I can't hold each other back." Finn's voice was cracking as he looked to one of the people that meant the world to him crying, but she understood.
"I-I know it's-it's just you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You-you know that don't you?" Rachel closed her eyes trying to pull herself together as she sat down on the arm of the couch with Finn standing awkwardly on front of her.
Finn nodded slowly and gave a little smile. "If that's how you feel about me, then think just how much you mean to me. You-you made me a better person and gave me the best love, Rachel Berry."
"I just need to ask one question. Please-please be honest. Are you and I finished for good? Do-do you think we can ever be-be together again?" there was hope in Rachel's eyes, but she knew, she knew this was the end and it broke her heart.
Finn shook his head and let out a sob. "I-I could say maybe, but, if I do, I know all I-I will do is wait for you and you-you will wait for me and I can't live like that." Finn kneeled down in front of Rachel and took both her hands in his. "Would it be too much to ask you if we could still-still keep in contact? I couldn't bare not even talking to you anymore."
"I would like-like that, Finn." She smiled through the hurt and pain in her face and the tears that were slowly becoming less every few seconds.
"What's going on? You guys can't." came a shocked voice and they both looked over to Kurt standing at the door.
"Kurt, bro, I missed you." Finn let go of Rachel's hands and got up and walked over to a lost looking Kurt and hugged him. Kurt hugged back as he looked over to Rachel that had her head down and wiped away her tears.
"I will explain tomorrow, I don't want to make it any worse. I'll text you to say where am staying." Finn whispered in Kurt's ear before Finn let go of Kurt. Kurt saw how strong Finn was trying to be but his eyes showed everything he was trying not to show.
"I better go. I'll um, I will come over to you Rachel before I leave to say goodbye." Finn and Rachel looked over at each other for a long few seconds.
"Okay." Rachel whispered and the next second Finn turned back to Kurt.
"Talk to you later. I missed you."
"I missed you to." Finn gave a broken smile to his brother before heading out of the room and out of their place.
Kurt stood there just thinking of what he just saw. Rachel stood up and looked towards Kurt's worried and sad face. Rachel tried not to cry anymore, not to breakdown in front of Kurt, she could do this.
"Rachel…I don't understand. Why?"
"It's for the best, Kurt. I can focus everything on my career now. Rachel Berry will pick her-herself back up and be a star." There it was there was that fake smile on a broken face that won't disappear for god knows how long.
"I am so sorr…" Rachel cut Kurt of.
"It's okay. I need to practice for College so, if you would excuse me." Rachel didn't look at Kurt once as she walked out of the room and left Kurt standing on his own. He knew that she needed to be left alone for a little while, he would check on her later. He knew Finn and Rachel always got back together but this, this was so much different. A lot of break up's is tears, hating, shouting, blaming and what he just saw, that was a, we-both-agree-it's-for-the-best.
They were so in love and getting married months ago and now, now it's all gone just like that.
Blaine.
What if they couldn't do it? What if the exact same thing happens to them?
Kurt's breathing started getting faster and tears started running down his face. He walked quickly out of the apartment and ran down the hallway as fast as he could until he got outside. It was pitch dark, but he needed air, he needed to breathe, and he needed to talk to Blaine's relaxing voice. Kurt took his phone out of his pocket and fumbled with the buttons until he got Blaine's number.
There was no one outside the apartments. In front of him were the steps that lead down onto the path. Kurt walked over to the side of the building where no one would be able to hear him so clearly. He pressed call and put the phone up to his ear as he heard it ringing. Kurt was full on crying now and his breath never slowed down, he felt like getting sick. After two rings the phone was picked up and the sweetest voice came through his phone and he relaxed just a little but not enough.
"Hello sexy! How's my boy doing?" Blaine's flirty voice came through the phone.
"I-I love you. Please tell me-me you still love-love me." Kurt choked out.
"Sweetheart, what's wrong? Of course I love you. Are you crying?" Concern took over Blaine's voice as he listened to sobs coming from Kurt. Kurt didn't answer.
"Honey, what's wrong? Are you okay? Did something happen? Kurt, tell me, please." Shit now Blaine was upset and Kurt felt like kicking himself for upsetting Blaine.
"I-I Yeah. I just really love you and-and oh god, please never break up with me, I love-love you too much and I-I don't know what-what I would do i-if…"
"Sweetie, calm down. Take a deep breath, come on, for me. You are okay; just listen to my voice, okay." He wasn't asking, he was telling because Kurt was in a hell of a state and he needed to calm down.
Kurt put his back against the wall and slid down it as his bum hit the ground and rested his head against the wall. "Okay." Kurt whispered and Blaine just about heard him.
"I know this is hard and whatever has happened to get to in this state don't let it. Fight it Kurt. There is no one like you and I and our love can do anything and it will. You-you are the only one I want to spend my life with. You are the guy I want to spend every moment of my life with. Long distance can go screw itself because it can't break us, it won't break us. Now please at least tell me you are safe?" Kurt let out a little chuckle at the screw itself bit.
"Yes. I just I needed to hear your voice. I miss you so much and I-I wish you were here with me-me right now. I wish I could j-just open my eyes in the morning and you would be there, mumbling crap in your sleep and I w-wish I was in your arm's right now…long distance sucks." Kurt had his eyes closed as the cold air hit his face.
Blaine sniffled before he spoke. "I don't mumble crap in my sleep." They both chuckled through their tears. "I mumble what I dream about and-and it is always you."
"Can we just give up school, our jobs and be together forever. We don't need money, clothes, music or any of that stuff; I just need-need you."
"Sweetie, you wouldn't be able to live without your clothes, I guess it be okay if we just went natural though. I hear that's so next season, Well, that's what I read in Vogue." Kurt let out a high pitched laugh that made Blaine laugh to.
"As long as you keep me warm, beautiful,"
"Always." They said nothing for a few seconds; they just listened to each other's breathing.
"Blaine?"
"Yeah?"
"I am sitting on a dirty ground." Kurt said with disgust in his voice and all Blaine could do was laugh.
"Well, the ground's lucky, but you on the other hand, have some washing to do." Kurt knew Blaine was smiling.
"Why? They are your skinny yellow jeans." Kurt giggled as Blaine gasped.
"Kuuurt, I am so going to kill you when I see you." Blaine joked.
"No you won't. See, we are going to be too busy making out and so on."
"Um, god, I really do need to go for a shower now. Like I mean the water rushing down my body just feels so good." Blaine chuckled as Kurt groaned.
"Is someone getting a little turned on? Because I can tell you I really am." Blaine's voice got lower and there was that sexy voice.
"Only you can calm me down and then make me not so calm the next second."
"Um, I like to call that the BA way. So, are you going to tell me what got you so upset?" Blaine's voice went serious again.
"Em, well, I walked in on Rachel and Finn talking, they, they broke up. It's for good this time Blaine, and just seeing them doing that…" Kurt still had tears on his face but he wasn't going to cry anymore, he was okay; Blaine and he would be okay.
"Woo, I wasn't expecting that. I mean I know Rachel didn't know what was happening between them two but, that is…where are they now?" The surprise was there in Blaine's voice and the sadness of hearing two of his friends breaking up.
"Finn went back to where he is staying and Rachel went to her room. I will check on her later, I think it's best to leave her for a while. They were getting married and now it's all over I just…I can't believe it."
"But if their meant to be together then…"
"Sweetheart, when I say it's finished between them, I mean they know their moving on now without thinking maybe someday they will be together. I thought they would…I don't know."
"I. Love. You. I know what you saw happened with them has made it scary to not know what will happen to us but…Finn is going to the army, Rachel's in New York, their miles away and god knows how long they could be away from each other. You and I know where we will be in May; I will be walking through New York airport to start a life with you away from Ohio." Blaine's voice spoke the truth and Kurt believed every word.
"How did I find you? I could have stopped anyone on those stairs and it was you I stopped. My life could have been so different without you."
"Kurt…"
"No Blaine, listen, I was so lucky you turned around and ever since then you have made me have a smile everyday on my face and god, I love you and If I didn't have you I wouldn't know what it feels like to love someone so much and have-have it returned." Kurt trying not to let anymore tears fall down his face didn't go to good, they fell again and he heard Blaine crying on the other end of the phone, miles away, but right there.
"The-the next time I see you can we j-just hide away and never return to real life?" Blaine chuckled through his tears.
"I-I wish we could but you, my a-amazing boyfriend, need's to change that school and sing your heart out at regionals."
"For you I will. At least-if I get to be student president Brittany won't get to ban the hair gel again at the prom."
"Oh Blaine, you-you really don't know how adorable you a-are without the gel, do you." They talked for another twenty minutes before they both knew it was time to hang up.
"If you get upset tonight again, ring me. No matter what time it is I will answer, okay?" Kurt nodded his head with a smile.
"Thank you. Promise you won't stay up waiting for that call, I need you to sleep."
"Why?"
"Because you need to be in my dream of course." They both chuckled and there was silent for a few seconds.
"I love you. Don't forget our Skype date tomorrow. Oh and I love you but I am not doing my hair and putting clothes on. I am staying in bed."
"I wouldn't forget. Kurt, just think about what you said there." Kurt did think and oh he didn't mean it that way.
"I mean I will be wearing my bed clothes, the unattractive clothes that you like to take of me on mornings." Kurt smirked and it was now Blaine's turn to explain himself.
"It's a hobby to me." Kurt let out a high pitched laugh as he put his hand through his hair. The laugh went to a scream as a rat ran passes Kurt.
"Rat, rat, oh my god, a fucking rat ran went pass me! Dirty thing, oh god, ewe, ewe, little nasty thing! Don't come near me away! I hope you didn't touch my shoes." The whole thime Kurt was talking-well screaming- Blaine was in a fit of laughter. Kurt got up quickly from the ground and ran back to the building. "Blaine, it's not funny, it was right there, oh god, ewe." Kurt stopped running as he stood outside the buildings door.
"I…can't…breathe…I…oh god." Blaine tried to catch his breath as Kurt gave out to him.
"Are you finished laughing at me? I could have died Blaine." Kurt joked as he put one of his arms over his chest. He was starting to get cold now.
"Ah am sorry, babe. Okay…I think am done laughing. Just go inside before you freak out again."
"Okay. I better go check on Rachel. Thank you for calming me down, honey. You're always there and I love you for that, for everything."
"Am your boyfriend, of course I would. I love you to. Night, angel." Blaine said softly and it almost came out as a whisper.
"Night, beautiful." The line was disconnected as Kurt just kept it at his ear for a few more seconds until he pulled it away and put it in his pocket. He turned back around, much calmer now that when he had ran outside. He entered the building to check on one of his best friends that was probably breaking down right now.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kurt lay on Rachel's bed with her. She rested her head on Kurt's chest and Kurt had his arms wrapped around her. She was asleep now after hours of crying and talking with him. It was two in the morning and Rachel had just falling asleep a few minutes ago. She could forget the pain for a few hours. He didn't want her to have to watch up through the pain when she realised what happened the night before. She understands, but just because somebody understands, doesn't mean it hurt's any less; to Rachel it hurt more because she was facing the truth. Kurt would be there for her, of course he would, he still had Blaine and right now he has never felt as lucky to have him.
Long distance was our distance to Kurt and Blaine. And there distance, well let's just say, no one had one like their's.
Comments
This chapter was truly great. I loved how Blaine was able to calm Kurt when he was freaking out and how he did all that he could to reassure him that they would always be ok. I enjoyed the moment where Kurt expressed just how lucky he thought he was to have Blaine in his life and how he didn't even want to think of where he would be without him. I loved all the emotional parts of the story but my favorite moment was probably when Kurt saw the rat and started to freak out and Blaine's response was to laugh. I could so picture that actually happening and it made me bust out laughing.