Blaine walked into the Lima Bean, pushing the door open so hard and so fast that he nearly hit a pregnant woman cradling an infant in her arms. Fortunately, the door crashed against a metal garbage bin set nearby instead. The crash startled the woman, and she shrunk back.

Blaine ran a hand over his face and glanced at the woman apologetically. "Im SO sorry. I guess I just dont know my own strength." He laughed nervously.

The woman relaxed, and Blaine rushed past, trying to escape the onlookers shocked, accusing eyes. The truth was, today, he just hated … EVERYTHING.

It was Valentines Day.

That fact should have had him strutting, grinning like a fool, and even oooing and ahhing over all the cutesy decorations. A little over a week ago, hed been exactly that way. Hed started planning the BEST, MOST ROMANTIC date (abandoned tower with a view of the countryside, candles, a serenade, a Blaine-cooked Duck Confit, and a bottle of 100-year-old wine nabbed from Blaines fathers special wine cellar) for him and his boyfriend Sebastian.

At the thought, he laughed bitterly (as if – Sebastian had NEVER been his boyfriend) and an image surfaced in his mind …

Sebastian flashed Blaine a sultry smile, eyes a little wide and twinkling, as he flirted and teased. "Your shy schoolboy act is HOT."

Blaine flushed at the memory. He clenched his jaw. He didnt want his body to still be so responsive. He wanted to hate Sebastian. To find thoughts of him disgusting. Stomach curdling. Blaine sighed. He should have known.

Sebastian was smooth … too smooth – chiseled and tall. The day Sebastian enrolled at Dalton, David and Wes gasped, literally gasped, when they laid eyes on him. They exchanged a glance and then said simultaneously, "Id do him."

Blaine chuckled and complained, "Youre not even gay!"

David and Wes shrugged. Again in unison, they explained, "Hot is hot."

Blaine rolled his eyes. He didnt know what all the fuss was about. Until Sebastian looked directly at him. Until their eyes met. Blaine felt like that gaze held him in place, effectively paralyzing him. His mouth fell open (a little).

This recollection caused deep shame and more face burning.

In that moment, Sebastian awoke something in Blaine. The weirdest, scariest feeling. It was part nausea (like he might actually puke), part sexual desire, and part belly burning. It felt terrible and yet good, too. It was wrong (that feeling, that attraction – something about it was twisted), and Blaine KNEW it. But he just couldnt stop himself.

The following three weeks was a whoosh … a dizzying, burning, electric and ultimately excruciatingly painful life-destroying blur.

Sebastian joined the Warblers and took every chance that association offered to flirt with Blaine. He even used his tryout as an opportunity to serenade Blaine. He somehow managed to VERY CAREFULLY edit, arrange, and mash up Madonnas Erotica and NINs Closer (still WAY too graphic for the Warblers, but not exactly triple X).

You let me violate you.

You let me desecrate you.

Erotic. Erotic. Put your hands all over my body.

You let me penetrate you.

You let me complicate you.

Erotic. Erotic. Put your hands all over my body.

I could bring you so much pleasure. Ill come to you when you say. I know you want me. Im not gonna hurt you. Just close your eyes.

Help me! Ive broke apart my insides.

Help me! Ive got no soul to sell.

Erotic. Erotic. Put your hands all over my body.

I could bring you so much pleasure. Ill come to you when you say. I know you want me. Im not gonna hurt you. Just close your eyes.

Help me! The only thing that works for me.

Help me get away from myself.

If I take you from behind, push myself into your mind, when you least expect it, will you try to reject it?

I want to feel you from the inside. My whole existence is flawed. You get me closer to God.

If Im in charge and treat you like a child, will you let yourself go wild, let my mouth go where it wants to?

I want to feel you from the inside. My whole existence is flawed. You get me closer to God.

I could bring you so much pleasure. Ill come to you when you say. I know you want me. Im not gonna hurt you. Just close your eyes.

I want to feel you from the inside. My whole existence is flawed. You get me closer to God.

Just close your eyes. Put your hands all over my body.

All over me. All over me. Give it up. Do as I say. Give it up. Let me have my way. Ill give you love. Ill hit you like a truck. Ill give you love. Ill teach you how to…

(SUDDEN SILENCE)

Italics only = Madonna

Bold = NIN

Blaine was more embarrassed by the serenade than hed ever been in his whole life, but he was equally as turned on. He … uh … retreated to his dorm room afterward (skipping dinner and everything). He needed alone time.

Once accepted into the Warblers, Sebastian approached Blaine for help. He said he was worried about not fitting in, not doing well. He asked for advice and even some coaching (for both singing and dancing).

Blaine laughed bitterly. Sebastian had played him so easily, so well. Blaine remembered Sebastians (he realized now) fake frustrated voice:

"I cant seem to manage this side step, not while swaying my hips like that and turning. Can you show me?"

Blaine turned bright red, swallowed hard, and laughed nervously. "I just did!"

"No I mean … guide me … with your hands."

"Oh. Uh … Okay."

Blaine felt his stomach flip, his entire body flush hot and then cold, and electricity spark and then course through him the moment his hands came into contact with Sebastians (he placed his on Sebastians hips and Sebastian slid his hands over Blaines).

That quickly led to a make-out session Blaine thought might literally kill him. He could barely breathe, and his heart kept stopping and starting like a skipping child.

THEN two weeks in, Blaine let Sebastian … uh … well … you know.

Blaines face burned. His stomach turned. The experience itself wasnt what Blaine expected. It wasnt romantic. It was … clumsy, mostly painful, and quick. As ugly as Sebastians insides.

Sebastian flirted and teased and drawled until he persuaded Blaine to sneak out with him. They went to Scandals, the nearby gay bar, got drunk, and danced too close (their dancing very nearly approached sex) and then IT happened …

Blaines face burned hotter.

IT happened in a filthy bathroom stall.

That wouldnt have been the end of the world (hed heard first times were awkward … that sometimes couples needed to do it a few times before it got awesome), EXCEPT … the next day brought a cold snap. An arctic wind blowing down from the North Pole …

… or was it the up from the South Pole? Blaine didnt know … geography was hardly his best subject.

Sebastian started avoiding Blaine, ignoring his calls and texts, and then, three days after taking Blaines virginity, he took the Warblers (but not the Warblers virginity ;) ... he took Blaines position).

Thats right.

The whole time Sebastian had been wooing Blaine, he had been staging a coup. Hed gotten all but three of the Warblers (Blaine, David, and Wes) to agree that Sebastian was a better front man. He was taller, with a more classic beauty, and he could sing and dance better than Blaine (or so the traitors all agreed).

An emergency meeting was held, at which David and Wes had only been able to delay the coup, arguing that Blaine should have a chance to defend his position. Everyone agreed, but there really was no point. Sebastian won by the same exact margin.

Blaine wasnt one to boast or exaggerate … he KNEW (KNEW) his performance was better. But he still lost.

Tears stung his eyes. Blaine laughed at himself and blinked them away. God, he could be such a drama queen. Still, it felt like hed lost EVERYTHING. Hed given Sebastian something special, something he could never get back … and in the tawdriest way. Sebastian hadnt really even wanted Blaine. That was the worst part. If hed wanted to seduce and then drop Blaine because he thought Blaine was hot but he didnt DO relationships, that would have been one thing. Crappy, but fairly normal. But seducing him and taking his virginity ... AS A PLOY to distract Blaine while Sebastian turned most of Blaines friends against him? That went beyond the pale. Blaine felt stupid and ridiculous.

Blaine quit the Warblers that same day. David and Wes made a half-hearted attempt to stop him, but even they knew staying would wreck him. They looked genuinely dismayed by everything. That helped a little.

Then the next day, five days after the virginity theft, Sebastian posted a video on Daltons internal Web server. Every student and faculty member got to watch Blaine pushed up against a grimy, cum-spattered wall … crying out in pain and then moaning in pleasure. The administration had managed to get it taken down, but it was too late. Everyone had already seen it. And of course, the IT guys were unable to connect anything to Sebastian. He was smooth alright.

Blaine lasted exactly one day after that. One day of whispers … students pointing and laughing … crude jokes (warbler had taken on a whole new meaning) … even cruder drawings. By the afternoon, he called his brother (though that required a submission and a humiliation all on its own), begging him to intercede, to get their parents to agree to let him stay with an uncle who lived in Lima and attend public school. Coop did it, but Blaine knew Coop was going to make him pay a steep price for that favor.

That evening, David and Wes helped Blaine pack. They didnt say much. They didnt know what to say. They kept looking at him with pitying eyes and making sympathetic faces. Then they played video games until his uncle arrived to pick him up.

Before Blaine left their dorm room, Wes put a hand on Blaines shoulder and offered, solemnly, "Well, at least your ass and back looked amazing!"

Blaines eyes nearly popped out of his head. He choked, "What?"

David shoved Wes and muttered, "Youre SO stupid."

Wes shot David a questioning look. "What? They did! If I were a gay dude, Id think Hey, that guys hot!" Wes waggled his eyebrows.

Blaine turned bright red, but smiled. "Uh … thanks."

Wes smiled victoriously at David. "No problem," he said to Blaine.

Again in unison, David and Wes intoned, "Dont forget to call!"

Today would be Blaines first day at McKinley. His uncle had allowed him to borrow his car (after he dropped him off at work— he did shift work at a nearby film processing factory). Now Blaine was at the Lima Bean, getting coffee before school. He hadnt really been able to sleep. School didnt even start for an hour. He was nervous. His uncle couldnt get the morning off, so Blaine would have to try to get himself registered. His parents had called the school the day before and the secretary at Dalton had already faxed his records. So It shouldnt be too hard.

As Blaine approached the counter, he glimpsed a plush ninja holding a heart ("Youve stolen my heart") to the right of him and a pink robot ("You turn me on") to the left. He grimaced.

Then he actually growled, "I hate Valentines Day!" and walked more quickly. He wasnt looking where he was going, so he accidentally ran right into …

"Kurt!" (as Blaine discovered a second later – when a shortish black teenage girl called out in the young mans direction and waved) "Meetings over here!"

Of course, that was a split second before Blaine accidentally sent Kurt tumbling to the ground.

Kurt was … surprising.

Yes. Thats it.

Blaine was a bit too jaded, humiliated, and hurting to process much, but he couldnt NOT notice Kurts blue, blue, blue eyes and his warm, warm, warm smile (which emerged after a flustered Blaine held out a hand to help Kurt up and started apologizing very profusely yet inarticulately). And oddly, for a guy, Kurts hand was soft. So soft (but strong) that Blaine found himself reluctant to let go. He even ran a finger over the top of Kurts hand before realizing what he was doing (Kurt had, at this point, turned a bright crimson), laughing nervously and flushing, and only then releasing the aforementioned hand.

"KURT!" The black girl yelled again. "COME ON!"

The young man colored slightly and laughed a nervous laugh. "I better go."

Blaine just nodded. He didnt trust himself to speak (nothing eloquent could be expected on V-Day and before coffee). Unconsciously, Blaine followed Kurt with his eyes.

Kurt was maybe an inch taller than Blaine, slender, with unstyled hair, skin white as porcelain, and a pink flush in his cheeks that Blaine thought might be a permanent feature. As he walked away, Blaine couldnt help but notice that Kurt had a nicely rounded butt. Blaine dropped his eyes guiltily then, but just for a moment before glancing back up. Kurt had reached his table by then and was actually looking at Blaine. Their eyes met, just for a moment, before they both looked away shyly. Good thing, too, because the barista was addressing Blaine somewhat impatiently at that point. "Excuse me … EXCUSE ME, SIR?"

Blaine laughed nervously and stepped forward. "Sorry … uh … medium drip, please."

Then he snuck another glance at Kurts table. He saw two cheerleaders in bright red and white, a very obviously pregnant blonde girl, a behemoth (very tall, with broad shoulders, and a confused look on his face), a guy with a mohawk, a short white girl with wavy brown hair, a super skinny Asian guy, an Asian girl with a blue streak in her hair, a black guy with a goofy smile and no hair, a guy in a wheelchair, and the previously mentioned short black girl. Huhn. That was a weird group. Blaine wondered what they could have in common. He snuck one more glance at Kurt, sighed, and turned back to the barista, handing her a 10 dollar bill.

Kurt was the exact opposite of Sebastian. Kurt clearly had a strong fashion sense (he was wearing a burgundy scarf, a black silk cap with a brim, and a white long-sleeved shirt with a black sleeveless cardigan overtop – and some too-tight, or just-too-tight-enough, black jeans that made his butt look amazing), but he seemed … innocent and sweet (with all that blushing and the lack of product in his hair).

Just then, Kurt exclaimed, "Oh HELL! If I have to hear ONE MORE TIME how your condition makes you one of the downtrodden, Quinn, Im going to pull my hair out! I was born gay. Mercedes was born black. You were NOT born pregnant! Stop being such a princess and learn how to operate a condom!"

Blaine chuckled. He might have to rethink the sweet part. Still, adorable and hot, funny, and gay (well and NOT a slick scheming lothario) … if Kurt went to McKinley Blaine was done for. He took his change and moved to the special counter with the half and half on it. Just then, he had a crippling thought. What if Sebastian werent satisfied with running him out of the Warblers and Dalton? What if he put the sex tape on YouTube? Blaine grabbed the counter and shut his eyes tight, riding out a sudden wave of nausea (that threatened to bring up the Egg McMuffin hed wolfed down on the way here). When he felt steadier on his feet, he started fixing his coffee.

Blaine snapped the lid on his coffee cup and snuck another glance at Kurt. He was smiling at something Mercedes (Blaine presumed … being the only black female in their group) was saying to him. Just then Kurt turned his head in Blaines direction. Kurt held Blaines eyes and smiled even brighter.

That … caused Blaines heart to fall into his stomach.

Blaine quickly looked away. If Kurt only knew … about Sebastian and the rest, he probably wouldnt want anything to do with Blaine (he didnt seem too accepting of poor life choices). A wave of dizziness washed over Blaine.

He sighed. Best to try to avoid Kurt altogether. He walked out the side door, passing along the way a red robot (this one said, "Love machine"). He accidentally bumped the rack. The stupid thing actually started playing "Love Machine."

Im just a love machine. A hugging kissing fiend.

Blaine rolled his eyes and cursed, "I HATE Valentines Day!" He slammed the door on his way out (well as much as one can slam slow release doors).

None of this went unnoticed by Kurt.