I Thought I lost It All
Underthedark
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I Thought I lost It All : Getting to know the Andersons


T - Words: 3,548 - Last Updated: Apr 05, 2013
Story: Closed - Chapters: 4/? - Created: Mar 01, 2013 - Updated: Apr 05, 2013
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Author's Notes: I have to thank my amazing Beta, sadly she isnt on S&C...but you can find her on tumblr, Crisscumfer.I also need to thank,fairytailsarereal. A question in your review, planted the seed that sparked this chapter.

As Mr. Anderson pulls into the long, drive way, Kurt gets his first glimpse of their home. He's entirely unable to suppress his gasp. This is not a house; it's a mansion. The yard is well kept and landscaped with bright flowers, appropriate for the season.

As the car is parked into an over-sized four car garage, Blaine starts sobbing. "I can't tell Copper; he's going to kill me! I told him I didn't want to dive that monstrosity, and he'll think I did it on purpose! Mom! Oh mom—she's going to be so mad. She didn't want me to leave today, said it would be nice to have a family day. I just—oh god, what have I done?"

Mr. Anderson seems to realize how perplexed his son is, and decides it's time to put him out of his misery. "Blaine, stop rambling and listen: Cooper isn't going to kill you. He's going to sit down and listen to you. Shit happens, son. Nothing we can do about it. Yes, you totaled a car--"

Kurt can't help but chime in with, "Or two."

This prompts Mr. Anderson to look back at him with a 'now is not the time' glare, and Kurt shrinks in on himself a little.

"Look, all that matters right now is that you're okay. And even though he's got cuts and bruises covering him, so is Kurt.You boys aren't broken, and you aren't dead. Now with that said, I'm going in the house to explain this mess to your mother and Cooper. I'd like for you to join me once you've gathered your emotions."With that, Mr. Anderson gets out of the car and makes his way in the house.

A few moments later, Blaine gets out of the car and makes his way to Kurt's door. He opens it and starts to help Kurt ease his way out. Noticing him grimace and flinch with pain, Blaine sighs. "You really should have gone to the hospital. What if something is broken? You're in obvious pain; I don't get why you refused to be looked at by a doctor."

Kurt frowns and scrunches up his nose. "If anything was broken, the paramedics would have made me go. They said that it was advised, but that I didn't have to. I just—I don't do hospitals. I'm fine, just sore from being thrown around. Plus the pain lets me know I'm alive. I should have died in that impact."

Kurt can see the tears pooling in Blaine's eyes, and barely hears him whisper, "I'm so sorry." He can't handle the kicked puppy look on Blaine's face, so he gives him a reassuring smile. "Blaine, look, I'm sorry I said it like that. Just—fuck, it's exactly like your dad said. 'Shit happens!' Don't beat yourself up over this, please. I'm already beat up enough for the both of us."

Blaine gives a watery chuckle. "Okay."

If Kurt can forgive him; maybe he can try and forgive himself.
__

As the boys enter the house they can hear Mr. Anderson talking with Mrs. Anderson and Cooper. "Yes, Cooper, I'm sure it's totaled. You'll have to call the insurance company and get it sorted out. Before you ask, no, the vehicle he hit didn't have insurance. Kid's homeless. He was actually living in the truck. He doesn't have anyone in his life or anywhere to go, so."

That's when he hears the frantic female voice. "That poor child was living in a truck? I just can't-- Why was he living in a car? What happened to his parents? Did you offer him anything; you didn't just let him go on his way did you? It's cold out and—"

She's broken out of her rant by a second male voice. "Mom, you're rambling."

Kurt chuckles to himself, and looks at Blaine. Must be genetic.

"As far as I can tell, he isn't exactly a child."

Kurt looks into the room at the remark, and judging from the 3 sets of eyes on him, his presence has finally been noted.The silence filling the room becomes unnerving; he attempts to smooth out the winkles in his button-down. He might as well let these people know who he is. If they were willing to open their home, he has to be willing to let them know how he wound up in this predicament. He looks around the room, and let his eyes fall on the woman with long dark curls, her honey eyes filled with warmth, and her smile, though it seems forced, is still welcoming. He takes a deep breath and addresses her questions:"Both of my parents are dead—my mother when I was 8, and my father right before I turned 17.I was put into the custody of the state until I turned 18. That pretty much means I lived in group home. I lost everything because of my father's debt. The only thing I was allowed to keep was the old truck, as it had no monetary value."

Kurt can feel the tears building, he hasn't talked about this is so long. He hasn't allowed himself to think about that day, and now the memories are rushing back to him:

'The black SUV and a cop car were waiting at his house as soon as he got back from school. The cop introduced himself and Mr. Fuller, a case worker for Child protective services; he had gotten a call for the hospital. They knew Burt had passed, and could no longer allow Kurt to stay at the Hummel's home. They told him they had known of the situation since the day Burt had been admitted. They explained how they decided to be lenient, since Kurt did spend all his time at the Hospital and school, figuring they could wait it out. Everyone was sure Burt would come out of the coma. Now he had no choice. Mr. Fuller had to take him into custody. He was told to go and pack no more the one suitcase of clothes, two boxes of personal items, and gather all his school things. A few months later, Kurt was informed that the house and business had been reposed by the mortgage companies. Everything inside had been sold to repay the debt. He could never go back to the life he had before. It was gone forever.'

Kurt pushes back the tears; there's no way he's going to cry.

That's when he feels it. He doesn't know when the hand had been placed on his shoulder, but it's warm and reassuring. Looking to his left, he realizes it's Blaine's hand.He wants to step out from under the touch, but as he looks in to Blaine's eyes, he knows he can't do it. His eyes are the most beautiful things he's ever seen—a golden honey with swirls of green.

Kurt sighs and continues his story, never breaking eye contact."The day I turned 18 I got the boot. The state deemed me an adult, and I was evicted from the group home. I'd already graduated, so I was told to get a job and become a productive member of society. What they failed to do was provide me with anything to become one. I had no place to go and no money. So I moved into the truck. I've been living there for the past 6 months. The money I'm able to make is from selling off some of my possessions and doing small car repairs.My dad was a mechanic, and I used to help him in his shop, but even that hasn't helped me find employment."

That's when a sob breaks the spell he's in. Tearing himself from Blaine's eyes, he looks around the room so see Mrs. Anderson sobbing into a handkerchief. What leaves him completely stunned is when she jumps from her chair, and points accusingly at her husband. "Charles, we are going to offer this boy a place to say," she says, then swings her body around to Kurt and continues her pointing, but softens her voice. "You will be staying with us. I will not let you freeze outside or starve to death. You will have to accept my offer; I am a very persistent woman. You have been through enough, and I will not let—"

She's cut off by her husband's shout of, "Anita! I've offered him the guest house. It's the entire reason I've bought him here."

Kurt is in awe of this family, not sure what is going on. They are shouting and pointing, and the man he's assuming is Copper seems to be laughing with pure glee at the spectacle.He soon feels a warm breath by his ear as Blaine whispers, "They never allow each other to finish a sentence."

Kurt can't help but chuckle. He's realized as much.

After the room calms down, Mrs. Anderson announces that Kurt would, in fact, be staying in the main house. She reasons that the guest house has not been used in sometime time, and they would have to have the maid go in and give it a thorough cleaning. Even though the thought of staying with the Andersons scares Kurt, he doesn't put up a fuss, and, when given a tour by Blaine himself, concludes it might not be so bad.

He is, however, concerned with feeling he got whenever Blaine placed his hand on the small of his back to guide him into or out of a room.It was a warm feeling, like nothing he'd ever felt before. Then again, he'd had one hell of a day; maybe he just needed sleep.

Turning to Blaine as they walked up the stairs, he asks, "So I'm actually feeling rather tired. Would it be possible to end our tour with a shower?" He doesn't expect Blaine to turn three shades of red and stumble through his response of, "Shower—Well, we could—No, I mean—"

Looking at Kurt's confusion, Blaine realizes that it hadn't been an invitation. "Ooh, you want to take a shower."

"Well, yes that was the reason for asking."

"That makes more sense," Blaine mutters to himself. Kurt would have missed it had they not been standing so close."No problem, I'll let you use mine. It's an en suite and offers a little more privacy."

As Blaine leads him into the room, Kurt takes it in. There are trophies lining the top of two large bookshelves, which are filled with books, CDs, DVDs and framed photos. A desk covered in what looks to be text books, notes, and sheet music is nestled against the wall. A guitar and keyboard are tucked into a corner on the side of the bed. On the bed itself sits a laptop and wait, is that a copy of Vogue? Kurt is, unfortunately, unable to finish honing his investigative skills as Blaine directs him to the bathroom with a, "Okay so, shower is in here. And feel free to use whatever you need; I have a spare razor and tooth brush in the top drawer on the right."

He begins to walk out, but is stopped when Kurt grabs hold of his arm. "Um, one more question. Do you happen to happen to have any clothes I could borrow?"

Blaine smiles, says, "I think I have some sweats and a t-shirt." At that, Kurt crinkles his nose. It's the second time he's done it, and Blaine can't help but think it's adorable.

"Guess that will have to do," Kurt bemoans.

"Well, you get to that shower; I'll leave the clothes on the bed. Dinner should be ready soon, so just come down once you're done."

Kurt nods and closes the bathroom door.
__
Dinner, it turns out, is informative. So far, Kurt has learned that, though Blaine was the same age as himself, he was still in high school, saying he'd had to repeat his freshman year since he's missed majority of it due to unavoidable circumstances. Everyone at the table became somber when it was brought up, so Kurt had tried changing the topic, and asked Mr. Anderson what he did for a living. The response was a simple, "I'm a Mortgage broker." The silence was growing uncomfortable, so Cooper tried to swiftly revive it by telling them of his interaction with the insurance company.

"—so I told them my brother had borrowed it to go on a quick errand, and that he'd wrecked it even though I've been told he was fairly good handling a stick." At that point Copper breaks off, looking at Blaine, and wiggling his eyebrows, crooning, "Get it B? Good with a stick."

The comment causes Blaine to blush and hide his head in his hands, while Mrs. Anderson yells at Copper, "Will you not make carnal implications toward your brother at the dinner table?"

"Listen to your mother," Mr. Anderson says with a sly smile. "Save it for after dinner."

With that, Blaine lets out a painful groan, and Kurt looks around, more confused now than ever. It was then that Mrs. Anderson brings about new conversation. "So, I was thinking I could take Kurt shopping for clothes tomorrow. I noticed he has none, so I'm assuming they were all destroyed in the accident. And while Blaine has more than enough clothes to share, it's obvious his clothes won't fit Kurt."

Mr. Anderson nods. "I don't see how that would be a problem. Make sure you get him some dress pants and shirts. It'll help him with finding a job; you know what they say, you have to dress for the job you want."

With that she nods and excuses herself from the table, soon to be followed by her husband and Cooper.

Kurt can't take it anymore. "What was that about?" he asks, looking directly at Blaine.

"That was my mother finding a reason to go shopping. Have fun with that," Blaine says with a chuckle. "She's very intense about it."

"No, not that. I'm talking about Cooper's comment. What was that?"

"That was a very inappropriately placed jab at my sexuality."

Kurt blanches. "You're gay."

His reaction must be misinterpreted, because Blaine's tone suddenly becomes very defensive.
"Yes, I am. If you have an issue with that, then I'm sorry for you. I cannot and will not change it."

Kurt wants to reassure Blaine that he doesn't care, that it was just a shock, that he would never judge someone about that. But Blaine is gone before he can get a word in.
__

Blaine is distant for the next few days.

He'd been bothered by Kurt's reaction. Sure, it had taken his parents some time to come around and accept his sexuality. It had also taken some very tragic events for them to accept that this is who he is, and would always be. They never stopped loving him, they just didn't understand. Then there was Coop. He had begged to throw Blaine a "coming out' party, which had resulted in Blaine getting their parents involved because he was sure, had he not, Coop would have done so against Blaine's will.

He can't place why Kurt's reaction shakes him to his core, but it does. It's all he can think about. Finally, he decides that if his parents could accept him to the point that it was embarrassing, he can make Kurt do the same. Even if he had to let some of the Anderson's skeletons out the closet.

When Blaine arrives home, Kurt is sitting in the family room watching a movie. Blaine grabs the remote and turns off the television. He starts, "I have something to say, and you aren't going to speak until I've finished. When I'm done you can ask whatever you want, but until I'm done I'd like you to just listen. Can you do that?"

Kurt simply nods. He doesn't know Blaine all that well, and after what happened a few days ago, he was just happy Blaine was willing to speak to him.

"Kurt, I'm gay. I've told you this, and your reaction the other night leads me to believe you're not ok with that." Kurt tries to interrupt, but Blaine holds up his hand. "Let me finish or I'll never get this out."

He continues when Kurt falls silent. "I don't want to care about what you think, but something about you makes me care.Your reaction shook me to my core. There are things you don't know about us, and my parent weren't always accepting. You remember me taking about having to repeat my freshman year?"Kurt simply nods. "I came out that year. My parents were less than thrilled. My father kept trying to take me on hunting and fishing trips; he even bought an old car so we could rebuild it together. Anything he could think of to make me man up. My mother cried, said she didn't understand why I would choose to live like this."

"It was hell. I felt like I was tearing my family apart. There was nothing I could do to change it. I tried making out with a girl to see if maybe I was bi-sexual, but it was the most uncomfortable thing I've ever done. I had to try for them, but you can't change who you are. About halfway through that year, a friend of mine asked me to his school dance. I was at Dalton, and figured, since we don't have dances, it would be fun. So we went together, as friends. He was gay as well, and apparently word had gotten around the school. Some of the kids there didn't like it."

Blaine stops and takes a look at Kurt, who's white like a sheet and sitting on the edge of his seat. Blaine didn't want to stop, but he had to make sure Kurt was listening, so he keeps going. "His dad dropped us off at the school, telling us where to meet him when it was over. As we went to go inside, some guys came out and grabbed us. They were laughing and joking, and I thought that maybe they were his friends. Turned out they weren't. They brought us to the parking lot behind the school and beat me within an inch of my life. He wasn't as lucky." Looking at Kurt, Blaine can see the tears in his eyes. He doesn't stop.
"I spent the rest of the year in the hospital and in recovery. My parents were so terrified. What if I had been the one that had died? They couldn't stand the thought and realized that it didn't matter who I loved. All that mattered was that I was happy and healthy."

Kurt looks up at Blaine. "You didn't have to tell me that," he says honestly.

"I did. I need you to understand"

He's cut off by Kurt's indignant, "You didn't have to tell me that, to make me understand." Blaine feels dejected and starts to walk away, but stops when he hears Kurt take a deep breath. "What the hell is with you Anderson's and never letting someone finish a sentence?" Kurt asks, frustrated.

"I don't need you to judge me Kurt; I get enough of that outside my house."

"Fuck, Anderson, just sit your ass down and let me talk!"

Blaine's shocked enough to do as he's told.

"Had you not run off the other night, none of this would be happening. I'm sorry those things happened to you, Blaine. They are horrible and I don't know how I would have handled it. Sharing a room with homophobic morons was more than enough for me. I mean, the verbal abuse was horrible, but after a while, I had built immunity to it. When your family starting making the jokes, I thought they might have been poking fun at me." He sighs, pausing to wipe his hands over his face. "I've been told on several occasions that I'm 'effeminate'. I was just shocked to learn that you were gay. It wasn't me being judgmental—I was stunned. But you ran off before I could tell you that I am, too."

"You're what?"

"Gay, Blaine. Did you not listen to what he was saying?" Cooper says as he strolls into the room and plops down on the sofa next to Kurt."What happened to the movie?"

"I turned it off; I needed Kurt's full attention, and—never mind, I've got homework to do," he says with a sigh. With that, Blaine gets up and leaves the room.
"See, told you he's come around. He's a little slow to catch on sometimes, but that's just because he's oblivious," Copper informs Kurt as he grabs the remote and turns the TV back on.

Kurt chuckles, "Think I'll go see if he needs any help," before standing up and following Blaine.

End Notes: If you have any questions, are think there is something i need to tag and havent please let me know. I'm new to actually writing fic, and i'm trying.But i'm not gonna lie or pretend like i have any clue to what im doing.

Comments

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This chapter was awesome. It was really great to learn more about the Anderson family and to see how they all act around each other. I can't wait to see what happens next.

This was a totally awesome chapter. I feel so bad for Kurt though. Oh, and you know what else was awesome? The nod to Cooper's acting training. "They were all pointing and shouting.."-Ha! I laughed out loud at that. I think Cooper's shaping out to be my favourite character, you know, other than Kurt. Oh, and just a tiny suggestion..maybe Kurt could get a job in designing or something? Maybe at a little shop right in Lima? Because I think that would make him happy, and right now I just want to hug him. *Sigh*. Anyway, awesome job! Please continue.