The top of Blaine's hand was soft under Kurt's thumb. Glittering blue eyes study the sleeping boy's every feature, from the dark circles under his eyes to the sweeping lashes against his cheek. His tan skin seems colorless and exhausted under the white hospital lights. But it's still Blaine. 

Kurt presses his chin against the cool sheets, looking up at boyfriend where he lays motionless, nestled into the pillow. If he stares hard enough, he can make out the gentle rise and fall of his chest with every breath. The ventilator exhales repeatedly with a hiss, but Kurt has grown accustomed to it as well as the beeps and other assortment of sounds in the ICU.

"Come on Blaine," he whispers for the thousandth time, "I love you."

A pang of guilt strikes him. And not for the first time. If only he'd said it earlier. Why did something have to go wrong in order for Kurt to tell his boyfriend that he loved him and needed him and cherished him more than anything?

A soft hand taps Kurt's shoulder, and he flinches away from Mrs. Anderson's touch. She looks down at him, regret and apology glazed into her eyes. "It's time to rotate visitation, Kurt."

"Can't I stay?"

"Only two are allowed at one time. Cooper just arrived from the airport, and he wants to see Blaine. And it's already 1:00 now; you should probably go get something to eat."

Kurt nods, too emotionally exhausted to argue. He rises and reluctantly releases Blaine's limp hand. Reaching over, he presses a gentle kiss to Blaine's forehead, letting his lips for a second before finally pulling away. "I love you," he murmurs against his skin.

He straightens out and clears his throat, "You'll call me if anything changes?"

"I will."

Kurt tears his eyes from Blaine turns away, quickly walking out of the ICU. He hears the screams and sobs from a family beside him as a sheet is pulled over a figure on the bed. His heart constricts.

He sighs in relief when he exits. The waiting room is crowded with people but he can make out Cooper pacing urgently back and forth. After a second, Cooper looks up at him and strides over. His clothes are rumpled and his hair is tousled but he seems alert, despite the exhaustion riddled within his features.

"Is Blaine okay? Is he alright? Can I go see him?"

"Last bed on the left," Kurt instructs. His voice seems detached. "The nurses inside will tell you the rules."

Cooper nods and moves to doors, but hesitates for a second, squeezing Kurt's shoulder, before rushing through the doors.

Kurt watches him disappear; his gaze landing on the little white sign beside the doors. The ICU sign swims in his vision. Blaine shouldn't be there now. He should never be there.

A sigh escapes his lips and he winces as he rolls his shoulders. He's alive, that's all that matters now, Kurt thinks to himself, he's alive.

"Kurt? You want to go grab something to eat?" Finn asks hesitantly.

"Where's Dad?"

"He'll be back. He just needed to go check on something at the tire shop."

Kurt nods, "Alright let's go."

They make their way down to the cafeteria, winding through the labyrinth of white hallways and busy staff.  He pauses at a window, catching sight of the press, with their nosing cameras and dark vans. He had almost forgotten that the incident made national news. All he was concerned about was Blaine.

He's still only concerned about Blaine.

With a deep breath, he turns rapidly away from the window and continues walking briskly down the hall, trying to separate himself from the reality of what had happened.

Forget everything else. All that matters is Blaine.

All that matters is Blaine.

The brothers reach the cafeteria and take a seat at a white table in the corner after grabbing a blueberry muffin and some juice.

The food is tasteless. Kurt wonders whether it's due to the quality of the food. Or maybe he's just not functioning properly.

The two eat silently until Kurt makes out a familiar tune. He looks up and sees a small television in the corner, the CNN logo flashing across the screen.

"Welcome back ladies and gentlemen," the announcer speaks, her voice clear and solemn, "We continue our coverage of the McKinley High School tragedy, where 23 students were killed and many more wounded-"

"Could you please turn it off?" Kurt asks quietly to an attendant, staring at his half eaten muffin. The attendant only looks at him blankly.

Kurt looks up, eyes flashing, "Turn it off!" he shouts.

The attendant hurriedly fiddles with the remote and switches it off, the small screen turning black.

"Kurt?" Finn asks concerned.

"I just don't want to hear about it more."

Finn studies him quietly before speaking again, "It's going to be okay."

Kurt rolls his eyes, "Look, can we just leave? I want to go back and see Blaine."

Finn nods and drains the last of his juice, before rising and following Kurt out of the hall.

When they finally arrive back at the ICU waiting room, Kurt finds everyone outside. Even Mrs. Anderson. He looks at them in shock, "What are you doing? Why are you leaving him alone?" 

Burt shushes him, "It's okay Kurt. The doctor just took him to get those bone scans done."

Kurt's shoulders slump in relief, "Has he woken up yet?"

The group shake their head and Kurt bites his lip in concern. 

Minutes trickle by, like grain of sand dripping through an hourglass one at a time. Kurt paces the clean floors impatiently, trying to control his breathing.

Finally, the doctor arrives. Kurt is the first to reach him, "What did you find?"

"Well, Mr. Anderson is very lucky. Most of the fractures and breaks are clean so he won't require further surgery." Kurt sighs in relief, and doctor continues, "In total, he's got a fractured sternum, one broken rib, three fractured ribs, two bruised ones. I understand this may sound severe, but I meant it when I said we were lucky. There is no treatment apart from painkillers and rest.  A lot of rest. The bones will heal themselves over time. In fact, after his stitches heal up and we can get him breathing on his own he should be good to leave and continue his treatment at home."

Kurt can feel a smile spreading across his face, almost uncontrollably. The doctor smiles in return before addressing the group seriously, "Pain relief will be important, as it will hurt every time he breathes or coughs. Taking shallow breaths and avoiding coughing will only put him at risk of a chest infection. We'll tell him all this, but you'll have to remind him. He'll experience some discomfort, but we can control the pain a bit by giving him some over-the-counter medication like paracetamol or ibuprofen. Also, to reduce pain and swelling you can put an ice pack onto his chest. You'll have to encourage him to breathe deeply and let his lungs inflate fully. Don't wrap a bandage tightly across his chest, as this will stop his lungs from expanding properly. I'll prescribe a narcotic," he explains, "as the pain will be severe at night. Also use painkilling gel to rub into his chest at the very end of the sternum, where most of the discomfort will originate from.  Other than that, he'll just need time. Any questions?"

"When do you think he'll wake up?"

"That depends on him. He's physically exhausted and looks a bit sleep deprived so I wouldn't be too concerned about the excessive sleeping. We're letting up on the sedatives, so he'll probably be awake in an hour or two. But we'll see."

The smile doesn't leave Kurt's face. He's going to be okay, he's going to be okay, he's going to be okay.

Kurt could just dance. 

Then after a quick conversation with the adults discussing insurance and prescription, the doctor left and Cooper and Mrs. Anderson vanished into the ICU.

Kurt now alternation between sitting down and pacing tirelessly. And then suddenly, it's 10pm and neither have emerged. His heart plummets as the nurse announces the end of visiting time.

But then, Mrs. Anderson and Cooper merge, Mrs. Anderson holding her oldest son close, her eyes red and swollen. "Kurt?" she asks hesitantly, "Would you like to stay the night with him?"

Kurt looks up in disbelief, "Really?"

Mrs. Anderson nods and before Kurt can stop himself, he's wrapping her in a hug.

"I'm sorry," she whispers.

"I'm sorry too," he replies.

She smiles up at him, "Blaine's lucky to have you. Now go!"

Kurt returns the smile gratefully and rushes into the ICU, not focusing on anything but his destination and the last bed on the left. When he finally sees Blaine, he freezes, his brain trying to accommodate to what it was seeing, despite how very wrong it all is.

They've dressed Blaine in a hospital gown and the ventilator is smaller now, only a couple tubes running from his nose and mouth. In fact, the number of tubes in general has decreased. Or maybe Kurt has just gotten used to them.

Holding his breath, Kurt pulls in a seat and sits close to his boyfriend, tenderly reaching for his hand and gripping it tightly.

He leans over him slightly, brushing his forehead gently with his other hand before singing softly, a small smile gracing his lips, "Hey there Blaine what's it like in Lima, Ohio, I was a thousand miles away, but boy you look so pretty, yes you do," Kurt chuckles despite himself, continuing his whispered song, voice lilting softly, "Times Square can't shine as bright as you, I swear it's true. Hey there Blaine don't you worry about the distance. I'm right here if you get lonely give this song another listen. Just open your eyes, listen to my voice it's my disguise. I'm by your side."

 Kurt giggles and then after ghosting another long kiss to Blaine's pale forehead, he sits back down, clutching his limp hand with his own hands. He presses his lips to Blaine's hand sits, and whispers, his eyes stinging, "I'm right here."

After a while, Kurt gets tired of a silence only broken by the gasps of ventilators and the beeps of machines. Everyone around him in the ICU is asleep or quiet. He begins to speak softly, "Do you know how I missed you? When I got here and finally saw you, god," he smiles to himself, squeezing Blaine's hand, "And then all of this happened and everything just got lost to in this whole mess. I hope you know that all I've wanted to do is keep you safe. Do you know that I went to Principal Figgins' office and threatened him? I just didn't want to see you in a hospital again..." Kurt's voice trails off and his smile falls slightly, "That worked out well didn't it?" he whispers.

Kurt looks up at his boyfriend's pale face, blue eyes bright in the dim lighting of the ICU, "I'm so sorry Blaine," Kurt's voice cracks, the breaths trembling in his throat, "I am so, so sorry."

Swiftly, Kurt wipes off a stray tear that slips down his cheek. "I love you," he whispers, almost inaudible.

Hours pass, Kurt alternating between sitting in silence, studying his boyfriend, or murmuring quiet stories and words into the hush.

He rests his head against the cool sheets, sighing, studying their clasped fingers. Suddenly, he feels Blaine's fingers twitch.

Kurt's head shoots up and he leans over Blaine, caressing his face tenderly, "Blaine honey? Are you awake?"

Blaine eyelids move for a second and then suddenly he blinks sleepily, his hazel eyes glazed slightly. They look sightlessly for a moment but then they catch Kurt's anxious gaze. Recognition flutters through them and Kurt can't help but let out a small laugh. He claps a hand over his mouth but then instantly returns it to Blaine face. He feels Blaine squeeze his hand weakly in return.

"Blaine," Kurt gasps, "You're going to be okay. You're doing so good honey. I love you, I love you, I love you," he whispers, voice cracking slightly as he tenderly strokes Blaine's forehead with his thumb.

Blaine smiles softly, focusing his eyes on Kurt. His eyelashes flutter, as if his eyes are struggling to stay open.

Kurt wipes the happy tears from his face and smiles, "Shh it's okay, go to sleep, I'm right here. You're okay. I'm right here."

Blaine's hazel eyes disappear and then his breaths deepen.  Kurt presses a kiss to his forehead, the smile refusing to leave his lips.