July 14, 2012, 8:56 a.m.
Model Behavior: Cake and Coffee
T - Words: 2,679 - Last Updated: Jul 14, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 36/? - Created: May 30, 2012 - Updated: Jul 14, 2012 552 0 0 0 0
Kurt's eyes widened and he looked completely mortified. "Oh, now I'm really embarrassed! When I had sleepovers with the girls and we shared food, they always fed me because they said I would take too much if they didn't. I guess it was because of the growth spurt I had one summer. I grew about six inches in just a few months and I was hungry all the time."
"Clearly, I missed out on that experience."
"Sleepovers?"
I'd love to. Thanks for asking. "Well, yes, that too, but I meant the growth spurt. I'm not exactly the tallest guy around."
Kurt looked at him for a moment. "Let's see. What do I say to that? 'Good things come in small packages'?
'Packages'? Are you sure you're not flirting with me? Your double entendres are worse than Amy's because they're unintentional. Blaine raised an eyebrow and waited to see if Kurt would figure this one out. When nothing happened, he decided to give him a hint, if only because it was such fun to see him blush. "I think I've been insulted. My package is quite nice, thank you," he said teasingly.
Much to his surprise, Kurt didn't turn a hair. "Conceited much, Anderson?" he asked archly.
"Hey, just saying. I've never had any complaints." Not that there's been anyone to lodge any, but still.
Kurt looked suddenly shy. "Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure. Anything."
"Do you ever get nervous about … well, about …."
Okay, this has got to be something sexual, or he wouldn't be so reluctant to say it. Given the conversation so far, I'm going to take a shot. "About being naked in front of someone?"
Kurt looked at him in surprise. "Yes! How did you know?"
Blaine shrugged. "Lucky guess, context clues take your pick. Specifically, you're concerned about being intimate with someone who has the same 'equipment' you do, and who might be making comparisons." I think I've moved out of the 'friend zone' and into the 'big brother zone'. That's fine, too, at least for now. It might even be a better neighborhood.
Kurt blushed. "I'm sorry. We don't have to talk about it. You probably don't even want to think about what two guys do together."
Should I? He needs to be reassured that I'm okay with this. I'm gonna do it. Blaine reached across the table and covered Kurt's hand with his own, and looked deep into the beautiful eyes across the table. "Kurt, it's fine. I told you before that I'm here for you and you can tell me anything, and I meant that. I take it you weren't able to discuss this with any of the guys in Ohio, and I can't imagine any man having this conversation with a girl. I'm glad that you feel comfortable enough with me to bring it up. Besides, I find your point of view very interesting." He gave Kurt's hand a quick squeeze before releasing it to pick up his fork and take a bite of cake.
Kurt sighed. "You're right; I would never bring this up with any of my friends. My dad is great, but there are some things you can't discuss with your dad. It is comfortable talking to you, like I've been waiting my whole life for you to come along."
I've been waiting for you, too, Beautiful! Blaine smiled. "Okay, for what it's worth, here's my take on it. It doesn't matter if a person is male or female, gay or straight; we all have anxiety about exposing ourselves to another person. Being intimate with someone is probably the most vulnerable position anyone can be in."
Kurt nodded. "That sounds like something my dad said once. I think straight guys have it a little easier, though. With a girl, there's nothing to compare it to. Even if she's had some experience, it's not right there in the room with you. But with a guy …."
"Look, Kurt, I'm pretty sure you aren't the type to get in a situation like that with some random man, so you would be with someone you love, someone who is worthy of you, someone you feel a real connection with." Me, for example.
"That's true. I'm not going to jump into bed with just anyone. I know that one perfect person is out there somewhere, the one I'm meant to be with, and I'm determined to wait for him, no matter how long it takes."
"And it would probably be a gradual thing, right? You wouldn't sleep with him on the first date, and you wouldn't go from nothing to everything all at once, even if he is your soulmate. You'd be taking it slowly, learning about each other, getting comfortable with one stage before moving to the next."
"That's true."
"So when you finally get to that point, is that what you would be thinking about whether he measures up to your expectations?"
Kurt looked shocked. "Of course not," he said indignantly. "That's the last thing I would be thinking."
I'm glad to hear it. "Well, then. You've answered your own question. Your partner isn't going to be judging you either. If anything, he'll be more concerned about how he looks." Blaine reached across to cover Kurt's hand again. "And don't worry, Kurt. You're a wonderful person and any man would be lucky to have you. Your soulmate is out there, waiting for you. Maybe you've already met him and don't even know it. Now," he added briskly, "don't make me eat all this cake by myself." He pushed the plate toward Kurt.
"What do you think we should get Kurt for Christmas?" Annie stood in the kitchen, newly-filled cookie sheet in hand, waiting for the oven to finish preheating. "Is the oven ready yet? " she asked.
"What should I set the timer on?" Jen asked as she opened the oven door. "I haven't got a clue what to do about Kurt. Should we all go in together?"
"Ten minutes. That's a good idea. Then we could get him something a little nicer. Marisol, quit eating the cookie dough!"
"But it's so good!" Marisol grabbed another bite. "He seemed pretty impressed with my rotary cutter. Maybe we could get him one. Of course, he'd also need a ruler and a cutting mat to go with it."
"What would that cost? Jen, get your fingers out of the bowl! If you two keep eating the dough, we won't have enough cookies."
"I'm not sure, Annie. It's been a while since I've bought any tools, but I think we could get a mat and a ruler at Mood for about $20 each, and the cutter should be about $10. What do you call this recipe again?"
"Christmas Rock Cookies. That sounds good to me, Marisol. What do you think, Jen?"
"Me, too. The price seems right and it's something we know he doesn't have and could probably use."
"Okay, I'll e-mail Sandy and tell her where we want to go. Stay out of the cookie dough!"
"Where did you grow up, Blaine?"
"I think I told you my family moved frequently. Dad is a freelance corporate reorganization specialist, and nearly every job was in a different state. He and Mom didn't want to split up the family, so every time he went to a new job, we went with him. If we stayed in a house for nine months, it was unusual. One time we were in Texas, Missouri, California, and New York during the same year. I think that was the worst time. After that, Mom put her foot down and insisted that Dad take jobs with bigger companies so we would be in one place longer. The only places I've ever been more than a year are Dalton and here."
"I can't imagine that. I've lived in the same house my entire life. Wasn't it hard changing schools so often, always being the new kid?"
"Yeah, that was tough sometimes. After a few years, my mom started home-schooling me. It was easier than dealing with different textbooks and sometimes being ahead and sometimes behind."
"So where did you perform, if you weren't in school?"
"Community theatre if the timing worked out, and I went to a music camp every summer, but the first real group I belonged to was the Warblers. I didn't mind being home-schooled, but it was kind of lonely sometimes. Dalton was amazing -- so many friends. I never had that before. Now that I think about it, I guess it was sort of like a huge slumber party. We had roommates, and there was always something going on in the evenings. Oh, I guess you know that, though."
"Well, according to Wes, you were very successful. Front man in your senior year, or was it longer than that?"
"Most of my junior year, too. Don't look so impressed. I was just in the right place at the right time. What about you?"
"Glee Club was the first group I performed with, too. My junior high didn't really have anything. I did some plays in high school, but no major roles or anything. So which do you prefer: acting or singing?"
"I'd call 'Officer Krupke' a major role. My first choice would be musical theatre, but if I have to choose one over the other, I'd pick the music. I don't know, though. Maybe that part of my life is over."
"I don't believe that for a minute. You've got too much talent, and you obviously enjoy performing. There must be dozens of community theatres in New York. Even if it's just open mic somewhere, you should keep singing. Besides, didn't you tell me you had dreams of recording professionally one day?"
"Yeah, well, I'm still not sure why I told you that. I've never told anyone else, never even said it out loud. It just felt right, I guess. We had known each other about two hours, if I remember correctly. "
"I'm honored that you shared it with me," Kurt said softly. "But how do you expect to reach your dreams if you don't go after them?"
The rehearsal had been fun, but the two-hour conversation that followed it had been incredible. Sitting there on the subway, Blaine knew intellectually that it was completely ridiculous for him to be so in love with a man he barely knew. His brain was telling him that he was in love with the idea of Kurt, something he had made up in his head, and not the real person, but his heart was saying otherwise, and every precious shared moment confirmed that his heart was right -- this was it, the only person Blaine would ever want or need. It had been all Blaine could do not to speak up when Kurt started talking about waiting for the right person, no matter how long it took. They had shared dreams and experiences along with the coffee and cake, and it was amazing how compatible they were. Just like their voices, their personalities meshed and complemented each other.
When Blaine got home, he fixed himself a quick dinner and set to work, determined to finalize what he had been thinking of as Kurt's Song. The first step was to find another title; probably no one would ask, but he wanted to be prepared, just in case. The next question was what instrumentation to use.
There were a number of factors to consider. I wish I could talk to someone about this. Maybe … He went to his computer and logged onto Facebook. Yes! He's online! He clicked the chat window.
Hey, Wes, got a minute?
Blaine! For you, always. What's up?
I need some musical advice. Do you know "Scotch and Soda"?
Is that a song?
I'll take that as a 'no'. Do you use Spotify? They have it.
Okay. Give me a minute.
You want the version from "The Kingston Trio Greatest Hits". IMO, it's the best.
You never were very humble, were you? Got it.
Okay, IMHO. You don't need to listen to the whole thing, just enough to get a feel for it.
It's a nice song and I think it would suit your voice.
Thanks, but that's not what I need. I'm doing that song, and another one that's more of a pop song. S&S will be guitar, but the other one could go guitar or keyboard. I'm trying to decide which song to do first, and what instrumentation to use on the second song. If I use guitar for both, the transition will be smoother, but since the feel of the songs is so different, maybe I need a bigger break.
So what's the second song?
It's called "Never Thought".
I don't know that one either. Is it on Spotify?
No.
YouTube?
No.
You're not being very helpful here, Blaine. Where can I hear the song?
Do you have to hear it to answer the question?
Yes.
Give me a few minutes. I'll have to e-mail you an mp3. What's your address?
donttouchmygavel@gmail.com
'Why am I not surprised?'
First Tigger, now Iago. Still not watching anything but Disney animations?
Again, you recognized it, Wes, so don't laugh at me! Back in a few.
Blaine connected the keyboard to his computer and played the song. He saved the file and e-mailed it to Wes.
Okay, check your e-mail.
Wes?
Just wait! I'm listening.
...
This is good, Blaine! You composed this?
Yeah, I did. How did you know?
Are you kidding? This has 'Blaine Anderson' written all over it. I can see you climbing on the furniture while you sing it. You ARE going to sing it, aren't you? Where are the vocals?
**Sigh BRB
Check your e-mail again.
Got it.
…
So who is he?
Excuse me?
OMG! It's Kurt, isn't it? This song is about Kurt!
...
Don't ignore me, Blaine. You know you want to talk about this.
…
I know you're still there. I can hear you breathing.
Ha, ha. Very funny. Yes, it's about Kurt, and yes, I like him. A lot.
So why aren't you together? Does he know you like him?
No, and I don't want him to find out. It wouldn't be appropriate.
?
He's a contestant on the show. I'm an employee. Even though I don't have any influence on the outcome, it might look bad. Besides, I don't want to distract him right now. He needs to focus on winning, and I can wait.
Fair enough. You have my sympathies, though. I'm sure it's hard being around him and not being able to show him how you feel. I'm here, if you ever need to talk about it.
Thanks. A few people here know, (including my boss -- that was a fun conversation) but I don't want to talk to any of them about it. It would be nice to have someone to use as a sounding board once in a while.
Your boss? As in Heidi Klum? Oh, man, I bet that was fun. How did that happen?
You know we video everything, right? Well, Kurt was pulling me around by the tie, and I got a little indiscreet and let my feelings show. Fortunately, Kurt didn't notice, but Heidi saw the footage.
He was pulling you around by the tie? That sounds hot!
Yeah, it was, but it was completely innocent. I had tied it without a mirror and he was fixing it for me. He just caught me off guard.
I imagine so! Okay, back to the songs. I think you should do your original song second because it's more upbeat and will leave the audience feeling good. S&S needs to be guitar, but I'd use the keyboard for NT. It will put a barrier between you and the audience so when you start singing to him (which I'm sure you will), it won't be as obvious. The break when you move to the keyboard will help change the tone, and won't make the difference in key quite so jarring, especially if you talk a little before you start the second song. You could transpose S&S, but I don't think that's necessary.
That's kind of what I was thinking, too. Thanks for your help.
No problem. Hey, send me a video of the performance!
I think you have quite enough videos of me! Later.
At least you have one fan, no matter what. You should appreciate me! You know, I still get hits on those videos every so often.
You put them online? I'm so going to kill you! You need to take them down.
They were public performances; there's nothing you can do about it.*evil laugh I wonder how I can contact Kurt.
Forget it. He's in isolation for the duration of the show, so don't even try.
Spoil sport! Check your e-mail later.