If he's given me ten seconds every day, what does that make us? Blaine mused to himself as he sat on his bed the morning after going with David to see Kurt and New Directions. He was back to his new nervous habit of turning his phone over and over in his hands. Can I take more than ten seconds? Should I?

Blaine wasn't sure what to do next, but he could feel the itch to do something. Coming to a sort of resolution with Kurt yesterday had given him a renewed drive to act that he hadn't expected. After all the drama with Patrick, and with a whirlwind of emotions swarming Blaine that he hadn't even bothered trying to indentify, he'd gone into that café not really knowing what he was looking for. All he'd hoped for was that he'd find something that might put him on a path, to stop him stumbling blindly from disaster to disaster.

But he'd spent most of the time just watching Kurt, still not knowing what all these feelings meant, why everything was pulled so tightly in his chest - and he'd almost wanted to scream because it was worse. Worse than watching Patrick storming off and not knowing if Blaine wanted to go after him, worse than missing his best friend while simultaneously rejecting him, worse than not being able to answer that question of Kurt's that haunted him wherever he went - what do you want from me?

And then Kurt had been about to leave and it had firmed a part of Blaine, the same part of him that had been brave enough to enter the café in the first place; and he'd realised that he desperately needed to talk to Kurt, to say more than a few impulsive text messages that had basically written themselves before Blaine had even thought about them. David's hesitancy to leave the two of them alone had been a blow - the realisation the one of his best friends didn't trust him not to hurt people any more was a harsh one. But it, like the panic at the thought of Kurt leaving, served a miraculous purpose - because suddenly everything had started to fall into place, so rapidly that Blaine couldn't keep up; and the sheer relief of finally being able to find some truths in all of this, and some direction, made his hands shake and his breathing quicken.

He knew that there was a long way to go before this situation was resolved, before he found the solution to his constant fear, his desire to run from the boy who made him feel so strongly and put himself on the line. And he had no idea what Kurt felt about him anymore, or where their friendship was headed for in the future. But the single most important realisation to come out of that blind panic and hurt had been that not having Kurt was scaring him, too. Maybe even more than the intensity of feeling that Kurt inspired. And maybe he needed Kurt in his life, even if it was only for ten seconds every day. The clarity this insight had brought Blaine had seemed achingly beautiful, so welcome it was.

Blaine smiled, holding onto the wonder of that moment, indulging in the small triumph of that memory. Kurt's face had been filled with pain, and he'd looked so vulnerable. But, despite how he'd suffered, he'd still asked Blaine back into his life.

Blaine's smile broadened. Kurt wanted Blaine back into his life, just as Blaine wanted to be there. Why was he sitting here on his bed over-thinking this whole thing, staring at his phone as if it held the secrets of the universe? It should be simple. They both wanted to spend time with each other.

Blaine finally stopped turning his phone over in his hands and invited Kurt out to the park instead.

x

The park was blissfully warm on Sunday morning, summer taking its first peek over spring's shoulder with a coy smile. As he settled on the cleanest bench he could find, Blaine could feel the sun slowly melting the nerves out of his muscles, and couldn't help but bask a little in the optimism the weather seemed to represent.

He'd barely had time to reflect upon, this, though, when he saw Kurt's car pull up. As Kurt climbed out of his seat and spotted Blaine, the Dalton boy leapt to his feet with a smile, which stayed firmly in place as Kurt approached. For a single sweet moment, it was like they were back at a time where everything was easy and bright - until Blaine stepped in a little too close, aiming for a hug, and saw Kurt's face tighten just slightly.

Blaine faltered and stopped where he stood, and there was tense silence as the two boys regarded each other, standing barely inches apart. 'Can I hug you?' Blaine eventually asked, his optimism waning further the longer Kurt just stood there with that taut pull around his eyes.

Kurt nodded, tentatively raising his arms to fall loosely around Blaine's shoulders while Blaine pulled Kurt close by the waist, mindful of Kurt's broken ribs. There was no strength in the grasp of either of their arms, both boys far too gentle, but their chests still pressed flush together. And as they held one another just a moment too long, Blaine could feel Kurt's breath pushing against his ribcage, changing the rhythm of his own breathing.

Blaine inhaled deeply and choked out, 'God, Kurt, I missed you.'

Kurt pulled away, looking wounded. Blaine could see his friend almost losing the battle with himself to scream, then why?

Blaine didn't have an answer to that. Not yet. He was relieved when Kurt won his internal struggle.

Blaine sat down on the park bench, tugging Kurt down next to him. Forcing a bright expression onto his face, he asked, 'So, are you guys ready for nationals?'

Kurt frowned. 'Blaine, that diversion tactic may have worked for David, but you can't expect it to work for you. You know we have to talk about' - he waved a hand between the two of them - 'this. We've slid along almost every point on the spectrum of relationships in the last couple of months and unless we talk about it, how are we supposed to know how to act?'

And there it was, that familiar fear clawing its way into Blaine's lungs, the one that had always resulted in him running. The fear of giving more of himself and ending up hurt. But this time, Blaine was ready for it, and he rapidly worked to divert himself. 'Kurt, this last week has been the most emotionally exhausting of my entire life.' Kurt looked incredulous, so he hastened to add, 'And I know I've got nothing on you, and I know that's my fault. But right now, I'm just so damn tired.' He grabbed Kurt's hands, locking eyes pleadingly. 'Before this whole mess, you were my only real support, and once you were gone... there was nothing. It took more than I thought I had just to get this far, with no one to help me. I'm exhausted. I know I have so much work to do, a lot of thinking and talking and begging for forgiveness' - the last added with a wry smile - 'but I honestly don't think I'm strong enough right now.'

Kurt nodded slowly. His hands were limp and unresponsive in Blaine's, but he didn't pull away. 'So then, why are we here? What I said about not knowing how to act still stands.'

Blaine smiled tentatively, glad Kurt hadn't rejected him outright. 'Like I said, you're my support. If I'm going to find the energy to keep going, it's going to come from spending time with you.' The long, slender fingers nestled in Blaine's tensed. 'For today, can we just... go with the flow? I promise you that soon, really soon, we'll work this out. But right now, I really want time with Kurt. No definitions, no complications. Only Kurt and Blaine.'

Kurt sighed, bending over and dropping his forehead to rest on their joined hands. It was an uncomfortable and awkward position, Kurt bent double where they sat on the park bench, but the weight of Kurt's head pressing down on their hands and Blaine's legs felt oddly comforting. 'You're playing a very dangerous game, Mr Anderson,' Kurt mumbled into their hands. 'But I suppose, if it's just for today, we can probably work with that.' He lifted his face up, and even after all the emotion and drama of the last couple of months, Blaine still found it startling to see how tear-reddened eyes looked on Kurt, contrasting with his skin. 'I've missed you, too.'

Blaine squeezed Kurt's fingers gently before letting them slide away with a soft smile. 'So, can I ask if you guys are ready for nationals now?'

Kurt giggled slightly and launched into a story about original songs and the difficulty they were having. They talked for hours, relocating to a café when it got to lunch time, and then again to the backseat of Kurt's car. Conversation never slowed, Blaine asking Kurt question after question to keep the other boy talking, the soft lilt of Kurt's voice like a balm on his grazed emotions.

Eventually, as the sun began to set and Blaine began to think of the drive back to Westerville, Kurt turned to Blaine with more nerves in his face than Blaine had seen all day. 'Blaine, can I ask you something?' he asked quietly. When Blaine nodded his assent, Kurt continued with, 'I know you said, when you came on Friday, that Patrick had issued you an ultimatum, but... I was... I wanted to know how that had turned out.'

Blaine sighed. He hadn't spent much time during the last two days thinking about Patrick - and it wasn't as if he was avoiding thinking about his probably-now-ex-boyfriend. Truth be told, he honestly just hadn't had room for thoughts about Patrick, being so wrapped up in Kurt.

And God, wasn't that telling.

'I kind of haven't spoken to him since we fought on Friday,' Blaine muttered sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. 'I just kind of assumed, since I haven't heard from him, that he knows I went to see you. And that he's making good on his threat.'

'Do you want to be with him, Blaine?'

Blaine sucked in a chest full of air and then let it out explosively, thinking hard. 'No. I mean, it was nice, but... you know I don't love him. I don't think I can, and that was even before our fight.'

Kurt's expression was unreadable. 'Well, either way, Blaine, you need to go and talk to him. You can't leave this hanging.'

Blaine chuckled, short and bitter. 'I don't think this is hanging, Kurt. I think it's pretty damn clear where we both are. Even if I hadn't come to see you, he still would have broken up with me.'

Kurt looked at Blaine in disbelief. 'I don't think so, Blaine. Once I found out you two were dating, I went home and looked Patrick up in the student directory, and I realised I  already knew him.' Kurt leaned forward and put a hand on Blaine's knee - the first touch he had initiated the entire day. 'Blaine, Patrick watched you with stars in his eyes every single day in the cafeteria, in the hallways, from across the courtyard. The entire time at Dalton, he was watching and wanting you, and his feelings were so clear and strong that even I noticed them - and I was pretty damn occupied watching you, too.' Kurt's bitter laughed mirrored Blaine's from before, and Blaine felt his heart clench. 'You don't give up boys you like that much over one silly visit to an old friend.'

Blaine could see how much it cost Kurt to tell him that, to potentially push Blaine back towards Patrick. Impulsively, he leaned over and tugged Kurt to him, still gently, but just firmly enough to not brook any easy opposition. He wrapped his arms around Kurt, almost trying to engulf the pale boy, buried his face in Kurt's neck, and breathed him in. Only once he was fully immersed in the feeling of Kurt being there did he say anything. 'Right before Patrick started issuing ultimatums, he said something that really got to me. He said, "You're not the person I was expecting." Kurt, those stars in his eyes were for someone who didn't really exist, and I think we've both realised that. If he hadn't broken up with me, I probably would have broken up with him.'

Oh so slowly, Kurt's hand came up to knot in Blaine's hair. They sat there for a moment, intertwined on the back seat of Kurt's car, Blaine's nose pressed against Kurt's neck, Kurt's fingers gently teasing the strands twisted between them. And then Kurt cleared his throat, and said timidly, 'Blaine, I know you think otherwise... but I've never really expected anything from you.'

'I think I'm starting to see that,' Blaine whispered, nuzzling deeper. 'It took Patrick and his expectations of the perfect Blaine Anderson to show me, but I think I might be starting to understand. Patrick had expectations, but you... You just looked into me, and then tried to help whatever it is you saw in me to grow.'

'How very poetic of you,' Kurt quipped weakly, and Blaine chuckled, disentangling himself from Kurt.

'Kurt, will you promise me something?' Hearing Kurt's noncommittal hum, Blaine squared his shoulders and ploughed on. 'You know how I promised to make use of those ten seconds every day? Do you think that maybe you could give me the same? Even with nationals coming up?'

The curve of Kurt's mouth was subtle and tender as he smiled. 'Of course. I promise.'

'And will you come and see me when you get back from New York, before I have to fly out?' They'd realised while discussing nationals that while Kurt arrived back in Lima on Saturday next week, Blaine flew out to join his parents in their New York apartment the very next day. It left very little opportunity to see each other.

'If I promise to come, will you try to do some thinking in the mean time?' Kurt asked tentatively, biting his lip.

Blaine nodded, opening the door and climbing out of Kurt's back seat, turning to pull Kurt into one last hug after the taller boy climbed out too. 'I'll get through this as quickly as I can, if you promise to be there with me, and not be too ashamed of me when I stumble.'

'I'm never ashamed, Blaine,' Kurt said, and pressed the most agonisingly light kiss to Blaine's cheek.

Blaine shuddered as he noticed that even with the most innocent of touches, Kurt still made his skin burn. 'I swear, I'll find our place together,' he said softly.

Kurt's arms were vice-like around Blaine for a moment; then, with a kiss to Blaine's forehead, Kurt was gone.