Kurt gripped Blaine's shoulders harder as Blaine rocked on top of him. Blaine's hand pumping him as their sweat slick chests slide together. Kurt's brain was a roar of, more, more, more and yes Blaine please! as Blaine moaned and continued to move inside him. 

It didn't matter how many times they'd done this, every time with Blaine was like a revelation. Like something spiritual. And okay maybe he was a little cheesy in the cusp of an orgasm, but god did this feel good. 

Kurt clinched his eyes closed and threw his head back letting out a shout as he came, Blaine thrusts a few more times before he let out a deep moan that Kurt was familiar with at this point. It never failed to make him smile. 

They both laid still for a moment coming down from their climaxes, Kurt on his back on the bed, legs that had been wrapped around Blaine's waist slowing moving down and stretching out. Blaine heavy on top of him, a little too warm for comfort, but wonderful all the same. 

Kurt felt blissful and happy, at peace with the world. The way he did every time with Blaine. 

Kurt sighed a little as another feeling other than happiness stared to creep in, a small current of disquiet that splintered through his contentment. This feeling was something he was familiar with by now as well, the first little tinges of the melancholy that sometimes hit him after his time with Blaine.

Kurt couldn't really identify it at first, he wondered if it was guilt or regret. It didn't stop him from seeing Blaine, and after time Kurt was able to pinpoint the feeling. It was dread.  It moved through his heart like little hairline fractures and caused Kurt to hold Blaine closer, harder against his chest as if the weight of Blaine's body could squeeze the troubling feeling right out of him. 

“You okay?” Blaine asked his voice still rough as he tipped his head up from Kurt's chest to look him in the eye. 

“I'm fine.” Kurt answered with a smile. Because he was fine, more than fine, he was so so happy. For now at least. 

“Just fine?” Blaine asked lifting himself up on his arms to hover over Kurt and look down at him. “I did something wrong if you are just fine after that.” He smiled and it made his eyes sparkle and Kurt's heart beat a little faster.

“Oh please.” Kurt said rolling his eyes. “You know very well that you just made me come till my toes curled.” 

Blaine chuckled at that, but it was cut off with an oof as Kurt pulled him down into a sloppy kiss. 

“Thank you.” Kurt said, his breath quiet against Blaine's skin. 

“You don't have to thank me Kurt. You aren't the only one with curled toes.” Blaine kissed him again and then rolled off of him taking a moment to throw away his condom and clean off. Kurt did the same before Blaine rolled back on his side to snuggle up next to him. 

“Thank you anyway.” Kurt said wrapping an arm around Blaine and playing a little with his sweaty hair, always a little curlier after sex. 

These things had all become habit at this point, not old hat or boring, but there was a comfortableness to their routine. The little seed of fear in Kurt's chest was a less comfortable part of their routine. 

Kurt scheduled a night with Blaine once a week. Which was a little excessive he knew, his bank account told him that regularly. He didn't want to change things because being with Blaine was like a drug to him. He craved their time together. Not just because the sex was phenomenal - though it obviously was, he and Blaine could win gold medals if it as a sport. It was more than that, Kurt had come to crave these times because of Blaine. Sweet, kind attentive Blaine. Who made him laugh as much as he made him shout. 

Blaine who usually ate dinner with him first and would wake him up in the morning with a kiss to the cheek. Blaine who never made him feel stupid for his lack of experience. Blaine who was the most beautiful man he'd ever known but still looked at Kurt like he was the gorgeous one. Just… Blaine. 

It wasn't supposed to feel like this, Kurt knew it wasn't. An escort wasn't meant to feel like a boyfriend, or take the place of having an actual boyfriend. Kurt hired Blaine to have sex with him, it was is job, Kurt knew that, he knew. That was why the dread unfurled inside of him sometimes, because this couldn't last forever. Someday this idyllic little illusion Kurt had created would come to an end. 

It was a frightening thought, he would miss Blaine when he wasn't in his life anymore. It honesty wasn't just about the physical aspect of their relationship. He considered Blaine a friend in an odd unconventional way, and he hated the thought of losing that. 

It also frightened him because of the sex. Or more accurately the lack of sex that Kurt had had with anyone other than Blaine. Kurt felt comfortable with sex after seeing Blaine once a week for a few months now, the trouble was he still hadn't built up the courage to sleep with anyone else. What was wrong with him? Why was it that he never felt comfortable enough to have sex with anyone other than Blaine? 

It meant that when things inevitably came to an end with Blaine Kurt would be left where he started, alone as he'd ever been. 

“You're quiet tonight.” Blaine said breaking into Kurt's thoughts, his breath warm against Kurt's cheek. 

Kurt turned to look at him. “I'm just thinking.” 

Blaine's gaze remained steady as he moved a hand up to cup Kurt's neck, rubbing his thumb lightly against his skin. “Is everything okay at work? I know you had that big project coming up.” 

Blaine's concern made Kurt's stomach swoop. This couldn't be the way it normally was with escorts. They didn't always care so much did they? This had to be something more… or had Kurt built it up in his head? This was the Blaine he was going to miss when things couldn't go on between them anymore. This was the Blaine Kurt considered a friend. 

Kurt shook his head in response. “No, work is alright. I'm just….” Kurt trailed off not knowing how to say, I'm thinking about how this is all going to end between us.

“Pensive.” Blaine finished for him. 

Kurt nodded and then smiled as Blaine pulled him in for a kiss. He ran his hand down Blaine's firm chest and felt him shiver. This thing between them didn't seem one-sided. He really believed that Blaine enjoyed their time together as much as he did. If Blaine's physical reactions were any indication he did. And Blaine had started talking about himself more. Kurt knew he'd be in an acapella group in high school (Oh my god that means he sings! What Kurt wouldn't give to hear him sing), that growing up he had a pet dog named Fiyero and that he once stood in the rain for hours to get tickets to a sold out Lady Gaga concert. Those were just some of the small but wonderful things Kurt was learning about Blaine. 

Blaine was the kind of guy Kurt would want to date if he'd met him in a different way. The troubling thought was, would he have given Blaine a shot? Or shot him down like he had Nick and other people who'd been interested in him in the past? Why was Kurt so... so… sexually, and even sometimes emotionally, distant from people?

Blaine bumped his forehead off of Kurt's and yawned deeply. “Sleep.” He sighed. “Sleep helps pensiveness.” 

“Does it?” Kurt asked with a fond smile. 

“Mmmhmm.” Blaine's eyelids fluttered closed and Kurt knew he wouldn't get any more conversation out of him tonight. He didn't mind, he let his fingertips gently smooth down Blaine's cheek and then held him close and waited for sleep to overtake his troubling thoughts. 

They often fooled around a little in the morning before one or the other of them had to go, but Kurt wasn't able to shake his unsettled feeling. They ended up just making out together under the covers while the morning light shone through the hotel curtains, before Blaine had to get up and go shower.  

Kurt got dressed, he'd shower at home, it was Saturday and he didn't have much planned. Blaine came out with a smile, running his fingers through his wet curls and kissed Kurt by the door like he always did. 

“I'll see you next week, right?” Blaine asked and his eyes studied Kurt's face intently. He never asked that, they always just left that as an unspoken assumption, but something in Blaine's face almost seemed worried. 

“Of course.” Kurt answered looping his arms around Blaine's neck and kissing him deeply. Because despite what might happen down the road Kurt was determined to enjoy Blaine's presence while he could. 

Rachel had a rare Saturday afternoon off so the two of them were supposed to spend it together. Kurt sat in a coffee shop he'd never been to before and waited for his friend to show up. The problem was she was already 15 minutes late. Kurt was frustrated and also a little worried. Rachel was very New York savvy after living here for years, but Kurt still couldn't help but fret over her at times. He sent her off a text to see if she was on her way and looked out the coffee shop window to a cute little book store across the street. Fairytale Press Kurt smiled at the name as his phone buzzed with an incoming message. 

Kurt I am so sorry. Rehearsal is went long. I'm on my way!

Kurt shook his head at the text, at least she was alright. He stood, tossed his finished cup of coffee in the trash and texted Rachel back. 

I'll be across the street at the book store.

I little silver bell chimed as Kurt walked into the shop and he was immediately greeted with the charming smell of rose oil and old books. The mix of scents hit some kind of memory in his mind, but he couldn't place it and didn't think about it long. Instead he stood at the front of the book shop completely enchanted by what he saw. 

The shop had warm wooden paneled walls and twinkle lights hung all over them, the room had a tall ceiling and a spiral iron staircase that twisted up to a loft with more books. 

The whole place was crammed with books, new and old. It felt warm and cozy and Kurt immediately loved it. There was a corner off to one side with big plush chairs so you could hole yourself up and read while classical music played softly in the background. As Kurt looked around and the only thing this place seemed to be missing was someone that worked here. 

That was okay though, Kurt was just browsing anyway. He wondered through the aisles of books until he found one that had old antique volumes locked behind the glass. He was skimming over the titles when he heard someone come up behind him. 

“Sorry, I was in the back and didn't hear you come in. Is there anything I can help you with?” 

Kurt's heart skipped at the warm and familiar voice and his mouth feel open as he turned around. There standing before him was Blaine, his Blaine, except this was a version of Blaine he had never seen before.

Instead of the fashionable suit and simple dress shirt Blaine usually wore, he was in a brightly colored pink, white, yellow and teal plaid button up - with a yellow bowtie and blue pants. Pants that were rolled up to the ankle and worn with boat shoes but no socks. The outfit should have been ridiculous but instead on Blaine it looked… perfect. Like this was exactly how Blaine was meant to look. 

They stood staring at each other wordlessly for a moment before another voice interrupted Kurt's surprise. 

“Oh my god Kurt I can't believe how late I am.” Blaine had hardly blinked and didn't look away from Kurt now, but Kurt forced himself to glace back to see Rachel Berry coming up behind him. “But look at this place. What a great find! It's adorable.” 

Rachel walked to Kurt and gave him a hug which he returned without thought before she seemed to notice Blaine standing there. A pile of books in his arms and a stunned look on his face. 

“Oh hi.” Rachel said. “Do you work here?” 

Blaine finally pulled his eyes away from Kurt to look at Rachel and he smiled at her before nodding. “Yes, I do.”

“Well this is an absolutely lovely store.” 

“Thank you.” Blaine said and glanced quickly back at Kurt. Kurt was still a little bit in shock, running into Blaine like this was such a surprise. He looked so different and he worked in a bookshop? It was like Kurt had walked through a mirror into an alternate reality. 

“Did I… interrupt something here?” Rachel asked in confusion. And Kurt finally shook himself out of his thoughts. 

“Oh no... no... I just… it's just that I know him.” Kurt said before he even thought over the words. He couldn't stand there and pretend not to know someone whose hands had been all over his naked skin that very morning. 

“Really?” Rachel said with a bright smile that started to slip as no one said anything else for a long moment. 

“Hi. I'm Blaine.” Blaine broke the silence and shuffled the books in his arms trying to reach a hand out, but when that didn't work he settled on placing them down on a nearby step stool. 

“Yes, sorry.” Kurt cleared his throat and made himself smile. “Rachel this is my… friend Blaine. Blaine this is-”

“Rachel Berry.” Blaine smiled and shook her hand. “Kurt has told me about you. And I saw you in the Gigi revival last year. You were fantastic.” Blaine's grin covered his whole face as he spoke to Rachel and made Kurt want to press a kiss to his lips. Which he normally would be able to do when they were together, but it would be completely inappropriate right now. 

“Thank you!” Rachel beamed at the compliment. “I'm afraid I haven't heard about you yet though. How do you two know each other?” 

She glanced back and forth between Blaine and Kurt and Blaine looked at Kurt expectantly. Which of course he would. Blaine would never just blurt out to a friend of Kurt's who never heard of him that he was the escort that Kurt paid for regularly. 

“Blaine is a friend of a friend.” Kurt landed on giving Blaine an apologetic smile. 

“Well no wonder Kurt wanted to wait here in the bookstore, I would too.” Rachel seemed completely oblivious to the tension that was hanging in the air as she continued talking, telling Blaine how charming the bookstore was and that she would have to stop by more often and then she mentioned that she and Kurt were going to get dinner later and if he was off work he should join them.

Kurt just stood there as if he was having an out of body experience. Whereas Blaine, after his initial surprise, seemed completely at ease meeting the friend of one of his clients.  Rachel excused herself to use the restroom, saying she had rushed over right after rehearsal and Kurt was left alone with Blaine again. The absence of Rachel's chatter making the silence between them loud. 

“You work at a book store.” Kurt finally spoke up, as if working in a bookstore was the most unusual thing in the world. 

Blaine nodded, “Day job, but you figured that out somehow.” 

It took Kurt a minute to realize what Blaine meant by that, “No.” Kurt said quickly. “No I didn't know you worked here. I came in by chance. I didn't stalk you here I promise. I respect your private life, really I do.” Panic was welling inside of Kurt, if Blaine thought he'd been poking around to find out about him when Blaine had just recently started opening up more it could ruin everything.

“It's okay Kurt.” Blaine said placing a hand on his arm. “Really, I don't mind that you know.” He shrugged. “So this is Fairytale Press.” He said holding his hands out and doing a fast little twirl on the spot, “Where I spend most of my day time hours and why I can't stay in bed with you in the mornings even when I wish I could.” 

Kurt blushed red all the way to his ears at those words. It seemed so odd to be talking about the things they did together at the hotel in the bright sunlight of this little shop. “You aren't on the clock Blaine.” Kurt said teasingly, “You don't have to flatter me.” 

Blaine's smile instantly dropped and only then did Kurt realize how insulting his words sounded. He didn't mean it like that. 

“It wasn't flattery.” 

“Oh god Blaine. I know. I'm sorry. I'm just… I'm messing this all up. I never expected to run into you like this.”

“It's fine.” Blaine stuffed his hands in his pockets and shot Kurt a smile that didn't seem to reach his eyes. “I'll tell Rachel no to dinner and we will continue on like this never happened.” 

“I don't want that.” Kurt reached out and placed a hand on Blaine's arm. Kurt's heart was pounding in his chest, this was it. This was his chance to have Blaine as a part of his life outside of their pre-arranged nights together. A way to see him without booking him. “I would love to have you join us for dinner… but only if it wouldn't make you uncomfortable.” Kurt smiled and tried not to show his nerves. Please say yes, please say yes.

Blaine licked his lips and seemed to be thinking hard. “I get off at 6:00.”

Kurt beamed at him, he couldn't help it. Blaine noticed the grin and shook his head, his own eyes sparkling. 

“Great! Great! Yeah… that should work.” Kurt enthused. They were smiling dopily at each other when Rachel came back. They all chatted briefly and then set up a place to meet later that evening after Blaine got off work. 

Kurt gave Blaine a hug before he left and then turned and waved at him at the door, still smiling ear to ear. 

Once they were outside Rachel linked arms with him, “So Kurt tell me all about Blaine and why you haven't told me before about this guy you are obviously crazy about.”  

Blaine stood frozen in place watching Kurt and his friend Rachel leave. He saw them link arms through the window before continuing down the street. He blinked a few times and then drew in a deep breath. 

What had just happened? 

Kurt Hummel had just walked into the bookshop where he worked. That was what just happened. Out of the blue. One minute life made sense and the next he was staring at Kurt over an armful of books and feeling like he'd been smacked in the face with cold water. 

Blaine looked down and saw that his hands were trembling, this could have been a disaster. Kurt in his designer jeans and his sashay walk and his gorgeous eyes and his sweet smile. Here in Fairytale Press with his friend, having a normal afternoon in his normal life and then… screech he happened to run into the prostitute he frequented. God, that must have been a rude surprise for Kurt. 

For a moment Blaine had known it was all over. This would be the end of his hired dates with Kurt. That happened sometimes. Eventually a regular tapered off or just abruptly stopped seeing him. That was part of the business and it never really phased him. In that moment though, looking at Kurt's shocked eyes and seeing him try to explain things to his friend Blaine had thought, well I'm never going to see him again. And the thought had hurt like a tight crush inside his chest. 

It shouldn't feel this way. He'd given himself the all things come to an end pep talk just that morning. Kurt had been quiet the whole time they'd been together and Blaine had taken as a sign the end was coming. He kept telling himself it didn't matter, things couldn't keep going on with Kurt this way, but it did matter to him, it mattered a lot. 

It shouldn't feel this way. Blaine had fucked this up so badly. 

He rubbed his hand down his face and sighed. The store was slow this afternoon and Blaine had been doing some reorganizing, but he went to the front desk now and just plopped down on a stool. He needed think, to figure out what was going on inside of him. Why the deep ache when he thought he was losing Kurt as a client?

Because you haven't treated him like a client for weeks and weeks now. A little voice in his head said. If he was being honest he'd stopped treating Kurt solely as a client the first time he'd met him and Kurt has so fearfully and with eyes full of trust told him he was still a virgin. 

Of course Blaine had really let things get out of hand since then. How many of the escort agency's and his own personal rules had he broken for Kurt Hummel? A lot. Quite a lot. 

He didn't regret it. Someday he'd meet Kurt at the hotel and they would spend a wonderful night together and he wouldn't know it at the time, but it would be there last night together. Someday Kurt would disappear from his life, he'd known that from the start. He still didn't regret letting himself invest more than he probably professionally should. 

Now that his heartrate was returning to normal Blaine found that he was unconsciously smiling. He was having dinner with Kurt this evening. With Kurt and his friend Rachel because Kurt had seemed so desperate for him to say yes. Because it seemed Kurt wanted to actually spend time with him outside of their prearranged hook-ups. Maybe things wouldn't end the way Blaine had been prepared for them too. 

Because maybe Kurt actually liked him? Maybe? 

Blaine covered his smile with his hand as he leaned an elbow against the counter. This could end so heartbreakingly badly, but at this moment he couldn't even care.