Chapter 10: Last Friday Night Was Like A G6

1, here comes the 2 to the 3 to the 4,

Everybody drunk out on the dance floor…

"Dude, this song is almost as old as we are!" David yelled over the music.

"It's an oldie but goodie, my man!" Jeff yelled back, as he momentarily disengaged from one of the girls he was making out with. "Plus, it's got its own built in drinking game."

As if on cue the next lyrics came pouring out the massive sound system and everyone grabbed their shot glasses.

Now everybody in the club gettin' tipsy…

Now everybody in the club gettin' tipsy…

As the chorus sounded out, everyone tipped their heads back and slammed down their shots.

Jeff Sterling parties were the perfect way to unwind after a long, grueling week of Dalton academics. They were also legendary for being modern day dens of iniquity. Despite almost everyone in attendance being underage, the liquor flowed freely, sex was in the air (and on the floor, and against the walls, and on the table tops…) and the only rules were leave your keys with the guy at the door and what happens at Sterling's, stays at Sterling's.

"Jeff," Blaine said seriously as he slammed his glass down on the counter and leaned toward his friend, "I thinks I's enebricated," he frowned and tried again. "No, I's intoxiated," Blaine announced proudly.

Nick, Wes and David burst out into amused laughter and Jeff smiled. "What you are dude, is drunk. Say it with me Blaine…drunk."

"I'snot drunk. I's jus not ssosober." Blaine slurred.

"You have the sexiest eyes," The redhead on Jeff's side said to Blaine, sliding over close to him and palming his crotch.

"And you hassa vagina," Blaine returned, squinting. "Ew."

"Excuse me?" The girl said, removing her hand.

"I'm homosectual," Blaine said a little too loudly as he reached for the vodka.

"He's gay and hasn't had enough liquor to get heteroflexible yet, give him a few more shots and maybe he'll give you a shot," Jeff explained before sucking tequila from the hollow of one of the girl's necks and taking a tab of ecstasy from the tongue of the other.

"'M notta fan of vagina," Blaine slurred solemnly.

"I'm a fan of getting off by any means necessary," Jeff said before taking another drink.

"I'm a fan of vagina," Nick said, as he snagged the vodka from Blaine and poured himself another shot.

The girl huffed and crawled over Blaine to straddle Nick. They instantly started a heated make out session.

When the redhead's top hit the table, David smacked his friend on the back of head. "Take it upstairs before you traumatize Blaine."

"That sounds like an excellent idea," Nick said as he led the girl away from the table and up the stairs.

"Hey, hey, David," Wes called, throwing a lime at him to get David's attention.

"What dude?"

"Why is all the rum gone?" Wes asked, holding up the empty bottle of Pyrat Cask and doing a terrible impersonation of Captain Jack Sparrow.

"The rum is gone," David began with exaggerated patience, "because we drank it all."

"I only had tree, fo, mebbe tree dranks," Blaine complained.

"And on that note buddy you are down for the night," David declared. He got up, and walked over to help Blaine up from his seat.

"But I wanna party! I wanna, David, David, I wanna party," Blaine whined.

David rolled his eyes. "Trust me, you've partied."

To say Blaine had partied was an understatement. It was currently four in the morning and since his arrival at the party Blaine had made the rounds, saying hello and speaking to a variety of people and then hit the dance floor hard. He'd also managed to play several games of beer pong, Suck and Blow, and Pass the Glowstick while drinking steadily the whole time.

"Come on, Party Monster. Up to bed you go."

"Jeffy, David's makin' me go ta bed. I dunna wanna!" Blaine wailed.

"David, let him be," Wes mumbled from underneath the girl he was making out with.

"Wes, you have a girlfriend, get your tongue back in your own mouth. And he's had enough," David said, as he pushed Blaine forward.

"I dunna wanna!" Blaine whined.

"You are a sloppy drunk, you know that Blaine?" David complained as he half carried, half dragged Blaine up the stairs and into one of the guest rooms. David dropped Blaine down onto the bed and retreated into the bathroom in search of a glass of water and some pain killers.

"Drink this, take these, and sleep it off, Superfreak," David ordered.

"I'm Rick James, bitch!" Blaine slurred. He downed the pills and the water, and then fell back onto the bed.

"Hey, hey Davey? I loves you man. Like somush, man."

David sighed and rolled Blaine on his side, took off his shoes and covered him up with a blanket. "God knows why but I love you too, Blaine. I'll be back to check on you in a bit, ok man?"

"I wanna party," Blaine mumbled in response.

"You did, Blaine, you did. I'll check on you later," David replied before turning on the bathroom light so the room wasn't pitch black and then leaving, making sure to close the door behind him.

Blaine curled himself into a small ball and drifted off.

The next morning it looked as if the hung over, half dressed, bleary eyed party goers were the survivors of a bomb blast. There were bottles, trash, clothing and half eaten food littering every available surface. Nick was hustling people out the door and David was going around with a garbage bag trying to clean up the worst of the mess so the staff didn't have to.

After about an hour the boys had managed to restore some semblance of order and went to wake their friends. Nick found Jeff in the boathouse, naked as a jaybird, with a raven haired beauty who was clearly not a teenager and a boy who could have passed for Zac Efron's twin. He grimaced, woke Jeff's companions and sent them on their way before waking his friend.

"Jeff. Jeff. Get up, dude. It's almost two o'clock." Jeff merely grunted and turned over. Nick sighed and flipped over the chaise lounge that Jeff was sleeping on, startling the blonde awake.

"It's two in the afternoon. David and I have done most of the post party work for you but now it's time for you to get up. Find your clothes and meet us in the kitchen," Nick said, leaving a hung-over and irritated Jeff on the boathouse floor.

David walked into the bedroom he'd dumped Blaine and Wes in the night before and found the two drunkenly spooning. He chuckled and took a quick picture on his iphone before waking them.

"Dumb and Dumber, rise and shine!" he yelled, leaning over the pair.

Wes leaped up and fell over the side of the bed while Blaine merely burrowed deeper under the covers.

"You ass," Wes said, rubbing his back. "Where are my clothes? Anderson! Did you steal my virtue and my clothes?" Wes demanded.

Blaine poked his head out from under the blanket and gave Wes the evil eye. "Does your ass hurt, Wes?"

"Only from where I fell."

"Then we didn't fuck and your virtue is intact. I have no idea where your last season's generic ensemble is either," Blaine snapped.

"Jeez, it was joke! I forgot what a bitch you are when you're hung over," Wes huffed.

"Guys, don't make me force you to hug it out," David threatened.

"Fuck. You. Sideways." Blaine mumbled from under the blankets.

"Let's join hands and sing Kumbaya," David continued undeterred.

"David, what did I do to you? Why are you torturing me?" Blaine groaned.

"You deserve whatever torture I see fit to put you through. I almost threw my back out carrying your drunken ass upstairs last night. Now get up, and get downstairs. We're leaving soon," David replied.

"David-"

"Your pants are in the dryer Wes. You fell into the punch bowl last night so I stripped you, threw your crap in the laundry and dumped you in here with Blaine. I figured he'd keep you from getting your hetero swerve on and you'd effectively block any random cock that might stumble in here."

Blaine struggled to sit up and pushed a handful of messy curls out of his face. "That is…why does that make some sort of sense?"

"If it does its only because I was tipsy when I thought it up and you're either still drunk or extremely hung over. I'm sure once we're both sober as judges it will seem like the worst idea ever," David replied.

"My uncle Lawrence is a judge. He's a total alcoholic," Nick said stopping in the doorway. "He once puked all over a witness after a liquid lunch."

"Can we, just ugh, don't talk about that stuff, please." Wes pleaded.

"Yeah, I thought you boys might be in rough shape this morning," Nick announced, carrying two glasses of a dubious looking substance. "Brought you guys two glasses of Nana Duval's patented hangover cure."

"I feel so bad I'm willing to try anything," Blaine declared as he grabbed a glass.

"Same here pass mine over," Wes agreed.

"No sipping," Nick directed. "You gotta down in all in one go."

Both boys downed the concoction then began sputtering and gagging.

"Jesus Christ, Nick! What the hell was wrong with your Nana dude?" Wes demanded.

"This is…oh my god the taste!" Blaine moaned, as he rushed into the bathroom and began furiously brushing his teeth with the spare toothbrush.

"You guys fall for that every single time," Nick cackled as he doubled over with laughter.

David joined in, snickering as Wes gargled with mouthwash and Blaine glared at them. "Seriously, how many times has he got you guys with "Nana Duval's" hangover cure?" David asked.

"Shut up. I never remember until after I put it in my mouth," Wes grumbled.

"There's a dirty joke in there somewhere," Blaine mumbled.

"Well, since the guys are up now I'll go ask Goldilocks if he's ready to go," Nick said, clapping David on the shoulder and leaving.

An hour later found Wes, Blaine and Jeff passed out in the backseat as Nick and David drove them all back to Dalton, giving thanks they'd made it through the party with nothing worse than hangovers to show for it.

After his outburst in glee the rest of the week had crawled by, cloaked in awkwardness and uncertainty. Neither Finn nor Rachel had spoken more than a handful of words to him, Mr. Schuester had vacillated between disappointment and concern, and the tension in glee rehearsals had gotten so bad that even Mike had been snapping at people. If that wasn't bad enough detention had been a nightmare, filled with the worst McKinley had to offer, all of whom took every opportunity to torture Kurt for an extra hour a day. Thankfully one of his friends always stuck around to make sure Kurt wasn't alone after he got out, usually it was Sam and Mercedes, but Friday Santana, Quinn and Brittany had come and escorted him from detention to Cheerios practice where Kurt sat and waited on the girls to finish before they all left for the day. Kurt had been grateful for the protection of his friends but was constantly worried that someone would end up getting hurt because of him.

Kurt had hoped he'd be able to put the week behind him and hang out with Blaine but the older boy had disappeared. The boys had barely spoken all week due to conflicting schedules and life in general getting in the way and so Kurt hadn't been able to get in touch with Blaine to make weekend plans. While he'd been disappointed, Kurt had decided to take the time alone to think about what he wanted to do about the drama with New Directions.

Kurt couldn't help but feel that, despite Blaine's protests to the contrary, an apology was in order. Even if though he believed his feelings were valid, he regretted expressing them the way he had and he really regretted the resulting fallout. There had been clear battle lines drawn in the choir room. Finn and Rachel were a unit, with Rachel taking the point position. Quinn, Brittany and Santana had formed a triad, refusing to work with Rachel and completely freezing out Finn. Sam and Mercedes had plastered themselves to Kurt's side, making it clear that their loyalties were with the countertenor. Puck was loyal to Finn but refused to take part in any choir room drama, often drifting into the group with Artie, Tina and Mike who were merely trying to stay out of the fray. Mr. Schuester was helpless to do anything other than watch as New Directions circled the drain. Kurt couldn't help but feel responsible for the whole thing and he wondered if an apology would get everyone back on track.

Kurt figured the first step he could take to repair the damage was to be nice to Finn. Kurt had spoken to his father and gotten him to agree that Kurt and Finn sharing Kurt's basement room would not be ideal. Kurt knew that Finn was still uncomfortable around him and was honest enough to admit that some of his past actions had played a part in that. Looking back, he realized his crush on Finn was largely a product of his own isolation and loneliness coupled with Finn's general attractiveness and him being a basically nice person. He also realized that Finn was safe; he was never going to like Kurt back but unlike Puck or one of the other boys at school Finn also wouldn't assault or attack Kurt for having feelings for him. Now that he'd gotten some distance and gained some perspective Kurt could see the events of last year a lot clearer and accept the part he played in the hurt feelings and lingering awkwardness that had resulted.

As much as he wished he could take things back, he didn't and he couldn't regret introducing Burt and Carol. While there was a part of Kurt that selfishly feared that his father loving Carol meant that he'd stopped loving his mom, it was only a small part. Kurt wanted his father to be happy, but more importantly he wanted his father to be loved and he didn't want him to be alone. It was no secret that Kurt was leaving Lima as soon as possible after he graduated and the idea of his father being completely alone broke Kurt's heart. He was grateful that his dad had found another great love in Finn's mom. Carol was a good woman. She was kind and loving; she understood and cared for his father and she accepted Kurt. Kurt felt like as far as potential step mother's go, both he and his father could do no better than Carol Hudson.

Behind the acceptance though, just beneath the growing fondness he had for the woman who'd captured his father's heart was Kurt's shame at his reasons for introducing them. He cringed when he imagined what would happen if he ever had to admit he only hooked their parents up in order to spend more time with Finn. Kurt thought that was his lowest point. It hadn't been the subtle suggestions to Finn that girls weren't worth the trouble they caused the quarterback or taking advantage of Rachel and giving her a makeover that eventually ended in her feelings being hurt, but the act of manipulating his own father, using Burt's loneliness and the Chris shaped hole in Carol's heart to further his agenda with Finn that had been Kurt's official rock bottom. Kurt hoped that the love the two adults had found in some small way atoned for that mistake. Kurt would never regret making the introductions, but he'd always regret his motivation for doing so.

Kurt hoped he and Finn could be friends. He'd resolved to do his part, but no more than that. He didn't want a repeat of last year and unfortunately Finn was under the impression that Kurt still had romantic feelings for him. Kurt hoped that living together, with Kurt being in no way inappropriate towards him, would help Finn see that anything romantic Kurt felt for him had long since passed.

Kurt sighed and turned his attention to Rachel. The worst thing about Rachel was that she and Kurt had far more in common than he cared to admit. He often wondered if they were as different as he and Tina or he and Mercedes if they would manage to get along. Kurt hated to acknowledge it, but the things he disliked the most about Rachel were the things he disliked the most about himself. The selfishness, the desire for the spotlight, the casual dismissal of other people's feelings, the ego…those were all Kurt's worst traits and they were all on display everyday he walked into the choir room and saw Rachel.

If that's all there were to the petite diva, Kurt would have simply written her off. But Rachel shared more with Kurt than just his worst traits-she also shared his best. She was passionate. She was dedicated. Rachel understood Kurt in a way that not even Mercedes did. She had a soft heart under a tough shell. Rachel endured her own brand of bullying and like Kurt, refused to let it change her or break her. She could be caring and considerate, and she was one of the strongest people Kurt had ever met. Despite himself, he admired Rachel. If forced to be totally honest, when he didn't want to rip out her vocal chords and strangle her with them, Kurt even liked her.

The fact that he did like Rachel was what had made her accusations hurt so much. He had thought if anyone could understand why Kurt would never lie about being attacked by Azimio, it would have been Rachel. Rachel had been his advocate long before she had ever been his frenemy. She was the one person he had always thought would always be on his side when it came to the homophobic bullying he endured. He understood that it was often impossible for her to see past her own ambitions but Kurt had just felt betrayed when Rachel had suggested he was lying.

Mr. Schue was a bit more complex. Kurt genuinely liked Mr. Schue, but sometimes he had a hard time respecting him. Time after time, Mr. Schue gave them inspirational speeches about what a character building experience being bullied was and encouraged them to sing about it their feelings instead of stepping up as their teacher and being their advocate and trying to stop it. Day after day, Mr. Schue let it slide when Kurt was singled out for ridicule and his sexuality was mocked. Performance after performance, Mr. Schue allowed his favoritism to blind him to the talents of the club as a whole. Time after time, Mr. Schue promised to change and it never seemed to take hold.

Mr. Schue had the best of intentions; he just had absolutely no follow through.

Kurt knew, regardless of his personal feelings, he'd been out of line. Shortcomings and failings aside, Mr. Schue tried and that was more than most of the faculty at McKinley did. And Kurt had to concede that Mr. Schue did care. He truly wanted them to discover the power of music and create a family that was a safe haven for them within the slushie soaked walls of McKinley.

Kurt groaned. Apologizing when he was so conflicted wouldn't be easy. He wondered if maybe Blaine was right and he should stick to his guns but that just didn't feel right to Kurt. He knew that if he didn't apologize things would fester and New Directions as a whole would suffer for it but he also couldn't help feeling if he did apologize he would lose any ground that he had gained.

Kurt decided he'd give his brain a rest and try Blaine again. He took out his phone and dialed, hoping that Blaine picked up this time.

Blaine answered right before the call went to voicemail.

"Blaine! I'm so happy you picked up, I've been calling you-"

"Jesus Kurt, please don't yell," Blaine mumbled.

Kurt frowned. Blaine sounded terrible. "Are you…are you sick?" He asked in a quieter voice.

"You could say that," Blaine replied. "A friend of mine had a party last night and I didn't really pace myself well."

"Oh," Kurt said. He remembered his April Rhodes inspired flirtation with alcohol and grimaced. "I've been there. Are you drinking plenty of fluids? Have you eaten? Blaine, have you-"

Blaine gave a small smile. Kurt's concern was touching. "Kurt, this isn't my first hangover. I'm fine. I just need to sleep it off."

Kurt bit his lip. "Oh. I guess I should let you go then."

"Yeah but, call me tomorrow. I missed you this weekend and I want to try to squeeze in something, even if it's just a Sunday afternoon coffee date."

Kurt felt his heart hammer in his chest. "I missed you too. Why don't you call me when you wake up and we'll see what we can work out?"

"Sounds like a plan. Til tomorrow, Kurt."

"Til tomorrow, Blaine."

Once the line went dead, Kurt decided he wasn't going to spend Saturday night moisturizing alone. He quickly picked up his phone and dialed Mercedes.

"Cedes!" He said as soon as she picked up, "grab your gear, and get over here. Super Saturday Sleepover is in effect," Kurt announced.

Mercedes paused for just a minute. "Kurt, I was gonna go to the movies with Sam and Artie."

Kurt bit his lip. His father had never objected to his hosting impromptu sleepovers before but they had all involved girls. Kurt crossed his fingers and hoped he wasn't making a mistake. "Bring Sam, and go by and grab Artie too. I'll call Tina and invite her…and Mike."

"Ooh, we're doing the New Directions Edition of the Super Saturday Sleepover," Mercedes teased.

Kurt bit his lip. He hadn't really planned on inviting the others. He knew Sam would be fine with spending the night and Mike and Artie would at least be polite if they turned the invitation down but other than Brittany he couldn't imagine having the others over for a social occasion. He'd never hung out with Quinn or Santana outside of school and the last time Puck had been at his house the delinquent had been nailing his lawn furniture to his roof. Kurt wasn't sure he wanted to face the potential rejection of the Cheerios or Puck's no doubt homophobic remarks but on the other hand he had to admit having everyone in one place where they weren't at each other's throats might be a good thing. "Absolutely, so you make sure you three get over here and I'll call Quinn, Santana and Brittany."

"What about Puck, Finn and Rachel?" Mercedes asked.

Kurt paused. His good will extended only so far. "Rachel has never come to one of my sleepovers; I doubt she'd want to start now. Finn isn't exactly comfortable around me so I doubt spending the night in my room is something he'd want to do. And as far as Puck goes, 'Cedes he'd never voluntarily spend time with the school fairy."

Kurt heard shuffling on the phone, harsh whispers going back and forth and then suddenly Sam was on the line.

"Kurt, I couldn't help but overhear and I'm totally on board man, but I think you should at least make the effort to ask Finn, Rachel and Puck. You don't want to make it look like you excluded them," Sam said.

Kurt was quiet. Sam had a point; purposely excluding Finn, Puck and Rachel wouldn't do much to rebuild bridges but at the same time Finn and Rachel's presence might set some of the others off. Kurt also acknowledged to himself that he was reluctant to ask them because they were three most likely to reject his invitation and rebuff would sting. Kurt took a deep breath and nodded, then felt foolish when he realized Sam couldn't see him. "Ok," he said quietly. "It's not like they'll come anyway. I don't know how to get in touch with Puck though."

"I'll call him," Sam said. "If he's in, we'll pick him up when we swing by and grab Artie."

"Make sure to tell him my dad's home and there's no booze," Kurt warned. Kurt figured if the fact that he was the gay kid wasn't enough to keep Puck away, parental supervision and no liquor certainly would be.

Sam laughed. "I'll make sure he knows."

Kurt and Sam hung up and Kurt quickly put in a call to Tina. She and Mike agreed to come and stop by and pick up some snacks. Kurt called Brittany, betting she would be with Santana and maybe Quinn as well. They were all together at Brittany's and despite some complaining on Santana's part, all three girls agreed to attend.

Kurt figured before he called Finn or Rachel he should warn his father. Burt visibly paled at the mention of boys but once Kurt explained it was just the glee club kids, Burt relaxed.

Kurt went into the kitchen and grabbed some popcorn and drinks before making his way back down to his room. He ordered a few pizzas and filled up the two air mattresses he had. Once that was done he realized he couldn't put off calling Rachel any longer and bit the bullet.

"Kurt," Rachel answered shortly.

"Rachel," Kurt replied. "I realize this is short notice but I was wondering if you had any plans for the evening."

"I'm with Finn. We're watching movies," Rachel announced.

"Well…actually, um this applies to Finn as well," Kurt started. "I'm throwing a bit of a spontaneous sleep over and everyone else in New Directions is coming so I thought I'd call and invite-"

"Oh Kurt," Rachel cut in suddenly. "Your transparent attempt to manipulate a way to spend time with Finn is both sad and misguided. I know that unrequited love is painful-"

"Rachel-"

"But you simply must move on and stop doing this to yourself. Finn-"

"Rachel-"

"-And I think that you'll agree that continuing to chase after-"

"RACHEL!" Kurt yelled.

"There's no need to yell, Kurt," Rachel sniffed, finally putting an end to her rant.

"I am honestly starting to wonder why you are so fixated on the idea that I still have feelings for Finn," Kurt sighed. "The sleepover isn't a plot to get Finn alone. I invited Mercedes but she'd made plans with Sam and Artie so I told her to bring Sam and they said they'd grab Artie on the way. Then we decided to call Tina and you know she and Mike are attached at the lip so those two were in, Sam called Puck-who I doubt is coming, and I called Quinn, Santana and Britt who all agreed to come and since it seems like most of the glee club was coming it seemed only right to invite you and Finn," Kurt explained.

"Oh," Rachel said thoughtfully. "This could be a wonderful team building exercise. We could do trust falls. Wait one moment while I talk it over with Finn."

Kurt sighed as he heard Rachel furiously whispering to Finn. They talked back and forth for so long that Kurt was about to hang up when he heard Finn's voice loud and clear say, "…I can't sleep in his room…" But Kurt couldn't make out the rest of Finn's sentence.

Eventually Rachel returned to the line.

"While the invitation is greatly appreciated, Finn and I are going to continue with our planned activities for the evening," Rachel replied, sounding to Kurt's ears less than happy about it.

Kurt willed himself not to let his feelings be hurt. "Ok…have fun." He replied before hanging up.

Kurt didn't get a chance to brood for long before his doorbell rang. He raced upstairs and was greeted by the sight of Sam, Mercedes, and Artie grinning widely and carrying overnight bags.

Puck was with them.

"Sup," Puck said simply.

Kurt stared back dumbfounded.

"What?" Puck asked when he noticed Kurt was staring at him. "Puckasaurus doesn't miss a party, even if it's a lame, no liquor having Hummel party. Besides Sam promised there'd be food. So you gonna let us in or what?"

"Oh, uh, yeah." Kurt said, stepping back to allow them entry. "I ordered some pizza…it should be here soon. You and Sam help Artie down the stairs, 'Cedes will show where you to go. I'll just ah, grab some stuff from the kitchen."

Kurt gathered more snacks and was on his way out of the kitchen when the doorbell rang again. "Dad, can you get that?" Kurt yelled.

Burt grunted and opened the door. After exchanging greetings, Quinn, Santana and Brittany entered the house.

"Hey ladies!" Kurt greeted warmly. "Sam, Mercedes, Artie and Puck are already downstairs."

"Puck came?" Santana asked.

"Yeah, he said Puckasauras never misses a party," Kurt replied.

"He does know your dad will shoot him if he tries to unleash Puckzilla, right?" Quinn asked.

Kurt smiled. "No, no he doesn't. And I'm not saying a word."

The quartet dissolved into giggles and made their way to Kurt's room. Sam and Artie were already going through Kurt's movie collection, Puck was exploring Kurt's video games and Mercedes had already changed into her PJ's.

"Hey losers," Santana said, sauntering into the room and sitting down next to Puck on Kurt's bed.

"Hello Satan," Artie replied, smiling as Brittany crossed the room to sit on his lap. Quinn sat down next to Mercedes and Kurt distributed snacks.

A few minutes went by and they argued about what movie to watch before settling on watching all four Child's Play movies. Mike and Tina showed up just before the pizza did and everyone took turns going into Kurt's bathroom to change. Midway through the first movie, Santana hit Kurt on the knee.

"Where are Frankenteen and his bride?"

"Yeah, where is Finn?" Puck asked

"They ah, they already plans. This was kind of last minute," Kurt explained.

Sam frowned and Kurt could have sworn he heard Puck mutter "dumbass" under his breath.

"Whatever. More pizza for the rest of us," Santana said as she reached for another slice.

Over the next few hours they made their way through three of the movies, with Sam and Puck giving running commentary and making everything seem so much funnier than it should.

"Hey Puck?"

"Yeah, Sam?"

"My name's Chucky."

"And I'll be your friend til the end."

"Oh my God," said Mercedes. "He's found a brain twin."

"Hidey ho!" Screamed Mike and Artie in unison.

"Have mercy on us all, it's contagious," Kurt moaned.

After Child's Play wrapped they started on the Evil Dead movies. Artie and Puck waxed poetic about the awesomeness of Bruce Campbell until Quinn loudly disagreed and a fight broke out about whether or not Bubba Hotep was a thing of cinematic genius. Sam recited word for word the evil incantations in the film which freaked out Mercedes and caused her to threaten to douse him with oil that had been blessed by her reverend. The ruckus only stopped when Brittany turned to Santana and asked in a small voice, "Did the tree just touch her special lady parts?"

"Um…" Santana stuttered.

There was silence for a beat and then Kurt cleared his throat. "You know, there's an Evil Dead musical. If we make it to Nationals maybe we can talk Schue into letting us go."

"Is the tree going to be there?" Brittany asked.

"No boo, the tree won't be there."

Brittany smiled and turned her attention back to picking out all the yellow M&M's in the candy bowl. Mike and Tina began making out in the corner, prompting Puck to holler out "Get some, Asian Persuasion!" which caused Tina to push Mike off of her and onto the floor. Everyone laughed and Mike turned six shades of red while Puck smirked.

"It ain't no fun if the homies can't have none," Artie cracked.

"Artie, you are a white boy from the 'burbs. Let it go," Mercedes sighed.

Artie smiled and shrugged. "Haters gone hate."

Mercedes threw a pillow at Artie, who threw one back and before anyone could blink there was a full on pillow fight taking place.

A few hours later, just as Kurt was about to pass out, Puck leaned up from his spot on the bed behind Santana and squeezed Kurt's thigh.

"Hey Hummel?"

"Yes Puck?" Kurt replied, sleepily.

"Finn and Rachel should have come. For a party with no booze, no sex and parental supervision…this didn't completely suck."

"Thanks Puck. Now go to sleep."

"I got an armful of Latina hotness. I'm not going to sleep."

"I swear to grilled cheesus I will cut off Puckzilla if he makes an appearance tonight," Kurt threatened lazily.

"Cockblock," Puck volleyed back.

"Man whore."

"If you two don't shut up and go to sleep I will rip out your vocal chords with my bare hands," Quinn griped.

"Sorry, Quinn." Kurt said, snuggling into the blonde.

Kurt fell asleep surrounded by empty pizza boxes, his friends and a feeling of complete contentment that not even skipping his nightly moisturizing routine could shake.