Blaine feels his chest contract and he’s so, so content here with Kurt. �He wants to pull him in; stay in this night and tell all the realities that will climb out of hiding that they must stay hidden as he and Kurt stay in the soft stillness of his living room. �He is watching when Kurt moves, shifting in his sleep, and his eyes flutter open, finding Blaine’s.

“Hi,” he whispers hesitantly as he moves his hands up to trace the soft skin at Blaine’s temples, brushing his hair back and letting his fingertips follow the line of Blaine’s ears, making him shiver.

Blaine smiles softly, his heart beating as if to escape while he breathes Kurt in, drags his fingers up to twine in Kurt’s and pulls them to his lips, kissing each finger in turn. �Kurt sighs and leans against Blaine, their legs tangled and torsos touching. �Blaine gently, reverently finishes his task and looks up to Kurt, his eyes dark and lips still wet.

Kurt bites his lip and nudges Blaine’s forehead with his own as he speaks.

“That’s really not fair, you know...there are just so many things a man can handle and your lips anywhere are a problem for me,” he pauses, rocking his hips against Blaine’s, �“in case you hadn’t noticed.” �

Blaine feels himself smirking even as his body responds, skin flushed and pulse throbbing, as he replies, “And this is a problem because...”

Kurt laughs, the sound of it lifting and echoing through the apartment and Blaine smiles ever more broadly. �He likes Kurt’s laugh in his home. �He finds that he could get used to it.

“Blaine, this floor is going to be the death of me...” Kurt begins before Blaine is pulling away and lifting him up from the floor, blanket and all. �Kurt’s eyes widen and he clasps his hands tightly around Blaine’s neck before hissing, “WHAT..what are you doing, Blaine?! I...what?” before he’s a mess of giggles and is blushing in spite of himself.

Blaine laughs and holds Kurt tighter as they enter his bedroom and he gently deposits Kurt on the bed and returns to the doorway, turning to speak over his shoulder, “Stay there, I’ll be right back...”

Kurt shakes his head and giggles again, slapping his hands to his mouth, acutely aware of how he must look. �Naked, wrapped in a cashmere throw while he sits on a...he looks around, taking in his surroundings and frowns, his face becoming pensive. �There is nothing in this room that says anything about who Blaine is. �The walls are off-white, the windows curtained in black. �Blaine’s furniture is all wood but also black, and the (king-sized) bed Kurt is resting on is covered in a thick black comforter with white sheets peeking out by the pillows, which are black and white to match.

Nothing. �No pictures, no watch, no books. �No clutter or even the barest hint that someone lives here all the time.

Kurt finds it all a bit unnerving considering his own apartment, although neat, is covered in framed pictures of family and friends from home and school, his personality evident in the decor. �This room tells Kurt nothing of Blaine or of who he is. �

But Kurt already knows enough to know he wants to know more.

He is considering moving, getting off of the bed and crawling between the covers, when Blaine returns, armed with the supplies he had brought into the living room earlier. �He stows the used towels in his (black) hamper, places the unused ones on his empty dresser, and makes his way toward the bed with the lube.

Kurt cocks an eyebrow and puts on his snarkiest air. “So you think we’ll be needing that again, do you?” he teases, lifting his arms to rest his fists on his hips. �The movement causes the blanket to slip, though, and he’s caught truly naked and, well, aroused by the idea that Blaine might want to go another round.

Blaine blanches, freezing a foot from the bed when Kurt first begins but then chuckles darkly, his eyes trained on Kurt’s dick as he continues forward, his fingers finding and pulling on the bedside table drawer where he deposits the lube before closing it with a quick flick of the wrist. �He straightens up, eyes lifting to lock with Kurt’s before he gently eases onto the bed, crawling over to where Kurt is blushing feverishly and biting at his lip again. �Blaine stops when his arms are framing Kurt’s hips, pushing into the mattress, and his lips are inches from Kurt’s and Kurt gasps as Blaine’s tongue lazily licks out to swipe at the red-bitten flesh there.

“Actually,”

Lick.

“I was just,”

Lick.

“Being responsible for my mess,”

Bite.

“But it seems as though you might be interested,”

Blaine slides his tongue into Kurt’s mouth this time, slowly filling the space, tracing Kurt’s teeth with his tongue before nipping lightly at Kurt’s lower lip and withdrawing.

“Am I wrong?” Blaine finishes, eyes dancing as Kurt’s body shakes beneath him. �Kurt can barely contain his shivers; his skin aching for touch and his mouth flush with the desire to taste. �He pushes Blaine backwards, Blaine’s head landing near the end of the bed, and crawls over him, purposefully dragging skin against skin until their groins and eyes are level.

“No, Mr. Anderson. �You’re not. �I think it’s time I had that cock in my mouth, wouldn’t you say?” Kurt replies, giving Blaine back what he had been getting.

Blaine lets out a long, low sound in affirmation and slips his fingers into Kurt’s hair, guiding him down as he replies, “Yes, I think that’s a great idea...”

***

The morning is the first time things are awkward for Kurt. �He wakes first, watching Blaine as his mind races.

What are we now? �Lovers? �Boyfriends? �Friends with benefits?

His mind twists and turns through passageways as he sifts through his current reality.

Desiderate is done. �Clara knows I’m here...

He scratches absently at the slight bump in the crook of his elbow where he knows his tracker lies. �This is part of the reason why Kurt knows so very much about Blaine. �Clients never know...but they are tracked from the day they enter the office until they choose to have their “blood tracker” removed. �Desiderate will never be involved with a loose cannon this way and Clara insists it’s the “only way to know for sure” that the clients they keep are safe for everyone involved. �Kurt has often wondered why the men and women who use their service don’t ask more about the trackers. �They just take it for granted that it is for the reasons Desiderate gives.

Kurt knows he will never agree to have something so in complete violation of his personal liberties done to him again.

At the time he told himself it was all for his father. �All for Carole. �All for their family. �Now, though, he has reached the end of it all with this one choice.

A physical choice that he could’ve avoided if he were stronger.

Kurt’s chest begins to ache...why had he given himself so easily to Blaine? �Now that Blaine had had him he wouldn’t want him anymore...not when he is this. �This...toy. �And, he thinks, I’m not even that anymore. �I’ve chosen the selfish pleasure of one night over my family.

He remembers that he is more than likely fired and that he still owes Miss Clara.

Kurt sighs. �I can’t even have him because now...now it will be for free.

Kurt stares at Blaine for a long time. �Every detail of the previous night replays and the memories flash across his skin, searing in and covering him whole as he gently eases himself out of bed, careful not to wake Blaine. �

Compartments in his head open and close and pieces are placed in lock boxes and stored away, shutting windows to his heart.

Kurt pulls on his coat and boots and silently slips out of the apartment while Blaine sleeps on.

***

Hours later Kurt is home, boots kicked off and Neenah hovering over him as he finds himself buried in his pillow yet again. �He stares at his backpack and realizes with a jolt that he never did any of the work he has due tomorrow. �He gave every bit of himself to Blaine this weekend. �He feels numb, like nothing that could possibly happen would shock him at this point.

His visit with Clara had been...informative.

He looks down at the paper in his hand. �It is wrinkled and torn, having been the target of Kurt’s frustration on his way back home, the dull ache of knowing he has nothing left keeping time with the sway of the subway.

He will have to call Carole; tell her he had been fired from the chorus line...finally sever the lie that he has been holding close and keeping her safe with. �They would have to discuss...letting go. �

Kurt sighs and sits up; his head bent and chin resting on his knees, tears dripping down his nose and onto the comforter as Neenah pushes her head against his shins. �

He never would’ve wanted me like this. �No matter what he said. �Not like this.

Kurt turns his head and lays his cheek on his knees, eyes searching the night sky outside of his window. �He’s hugging his legs, wishing they are Blaine, wanting someone, anyone to talk to and then he breaks, a choked sob escaping before he drops the paper and rocks back and forth, letting the tears flow.

Mr. Hummel,

As you are aware, when you agreed to be employed by Desiderate you signed a contract that included a “non-fraternizing policy”. �

Section 2a of the aforementioned policy includes “sexual encounters beyond the work environment when the client is still contracted to Desiderate” as a violation of your contract. �

We regret to inform you that as of this communiqu� your working relationship is hereby dissolved. �As per your original contract you are still bound to the 12/12 rule: 12 months or 12 encounters. �

As of this communiqu� you have completed 7 encounters. �You have been employed by Desiderate for 8 months, making your 12 month commitment unfulfilled. �You therefore owe 5 encounters or 5 client fees totaling $100,000.
��
Your compliance is expected so that we do not have to seek outside assistance in this matter.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Sincerely,
Desiderate, INC.