Unexpected
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Unexpected: Sex Riots


T - Words: 971 - Last Updated: Feb 26, 2012
Story: Closed - Chapters: 14/? - Created: Nov 29, 2011 - Updated: Feb 26, 2012
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Author's Notes: Prompt: No one expects Kurt or the New Directions to be sexy, yet their performances seem to end in sex riots quite often.Author's Note:I got to spend New Year's Day sick with the stomach, which wasn't fun at all, but I was feeling well enough to respond to everyone's lovely reviews last week. Thanks so much to you all. I will spend my weekend writing ahead so that I won't miss a week again, but sadly I'm only human. So lots of people write similar ideas and there are many variations of Blaine finding out how sexy Kurt is (Blaine watching video performances are a total fanfiction guilty pleasure of mine). On that note, I haven't seen many where Blaine is part of a New Directions sex riot. If the writers of Glee made this canon in 2012 I could die happy.It occurred to me that I post on Tuesday, and that's when Glee airs here. I never did that intentionally, but hey!Disclaimer: I don't own anything. If I owned it, I would be IN it.
Kurt was elated. He was back at McKinley where he truly belonged and his gorgeous, loving boyfriend was by his side. Blaine had quickly become an integral member of New Directions because of his natural stage presence and incredible voice, and glee club was gearing up for their first performance of the school year. Keeping in true ND fashion, the group had come up with a provocative number that would send Coach Sylvester in a tail spin of a hissy fit. Mr. Schue seemed a little too pleased about that, he had left class muttering something about revenge for finding dog groomer shears in place of all his hairbrushes over the summer.

In the interest of Blaine's sanity, Kurt felt that he should warn Blaine that the assembly might get out of hand. This was something that he felt Blaine needed to prepare himself for, seeing as even when the boys at Dalton were jamming out to a Warblers' performance they did it in a gentlemanly fashion.

Blaine had laughed off his worries, completely disregarding the serious look on Kurt's face. He assured Kurt that while it was sexy, he doubted one song by a club hated by the entire school would send every person in the gym into a frenzy; he was correct about the fact that the New Directions were as unpopular as ever. Kurt thought that he understood why Blaine didn't believe him after the disaster of his attempt at sexuality during the Warblers "Animal" performance. Sure, Blaine was attracted to Kurt, but there was a difference between being sexy to one person and being sexy to a gymnasium full of people. Kurt mused that Blaine was just trying to be realistic of the outcome, but it was still a little hurtful that he didn't even get the benefit of the doubt from his own boyfriend. Kurt had tried to tell him about previous performances that his school had put on for McKinley, but Blaine seemed to think he was exaggerating.

Silly boy.

New Directions had always tried to push boundaries, and Mr. Shuester seemed to enjoy choosing raunchy or risqu� numbers after the (questionable) success of that first "Push It" performance. The glee club should have been encouraged to try more conservative numbers in order to display a wholesome front that would be attractive to potential sponsors. That really would have been the smart thing to do. Rather, it seemed that the more sexually teasing, taboo, or downright wrong the performance may have been considered, the more successful it was likely to be. Kurt had seen this on many occasions, usually because he was at the center of the whirlwind of hip thrusting and moaning. Yeah, Blaine didn't really believe that part either.

Kurt was hesitant at first to tell Blaine about the Britney Spears sex riot that the New Directions had caused shortly before they met, but Blaine was part of the group now and he deserved to know what he was getting into.

Though the Cheerios' performance of "4 Minutes" wasn't quite as provocative as its sexy predecessors it still held very promising moves. Sue Sylvester knew that sex appeal was a key component to any winning performance; however, she would never tarnish the name of her precious squad with such vulgar dance moves.

He hadn't been at McKinley for alcohol awareness week, thus missing Brittany puking grey-purple all over Rachel, but apparently "Tik Tok" had been going over quite well. Were it not interrupted, Kurt was certain another riotous situation would have unfolded.

Even some of their friends had agreed with Kurt if they happened to be around. Puck would smirk and hold out a fist until Kurt returned the gesture, which usually made Quinn roll her eyes, and Tina would put on as innocent a face as she could muster up. Rachel's eyes would light up any time Kurt mentioned their previous performances and then would proceed on a tangent about the New Directions was learning to harness their sex appeal.

At least Kurt could say that he had tried to warn Blaine.

XX

That's the point he reiterated as the New Directions hustled offstage. The rest of the student body had lost its collective mind back out in the gym. The screaming and general chaos wasn't unusual for McKinley, but the grabby hands were new. Blaine had almost been pulled off the stage by one overzealous student, and Finn had decked the guy who grabbed Rachel's ass. Kurt chuckled to himself as he pictured the look on Jacob Ben Israel's face when two Cheerios sitting a few rows in front of him began to grind together, dancing and enjoying the performance. He laughed harder at the stunned look on his boyfriend's face.

"Wha-" Blaine shook his head as if to clear his stupor, "But how? This makes no sense!"

"Oh sweetie," Kurt kissed him on the cheek before skipping off to grab Quinn by the waist and spin her around. Puck took the opportunity to slap a hand down on the new guy's shoulder.

"I would say that you get used to it... But you really don't," he shrugged, "Try not to worry yourself too much. Azimio was rocking out but that doesn't mean you shouldn't duck if he comes within ten feet of you with a slushie in his hand."

XX

Later, after he had realized how little homework he had to do (one of his favourite perks of public school) and had texted his millionth 'I love you more' to his boyfriend and his ten millionth 'No David it's still a felony if you and Wes don't get caught' to his best friends, Blaine would lay on his bed and wonder what he had gotten himself into; this school was apparently crazy, and probably hazardous to his health.

Then he would picture Kurt, wild and free up on stage, and come to a decision: "Totally worth it."

End Notes: Author's Note: A hell of a lot cheesier than I'd intended, but I kinda like it. C'mon Glee! New Directions sex riot season 3! Who else has their fingers crossed?

Comments

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Oh there has to. Has to. It's like...written into everybody's contracts, I'm sure. It wouldn't be Glee without one! And after what happened in "Hold On To Sixteen" I can't WAIT to see Blaine's reaction :p

I've got mine crossed! Lol. Really, I just wanna see Blaine shirtless and a legit full fledged make out scene for him and Kurt. For cereal. Also, I love how you write Blaine. :)