His heart pounded in his chest and his hands were clammy as he walked to the front door. Blaine darted his eyes around him, he wasn’t sure why. Perhaps checking to see if anyone he knew was around or looking for a sign to tell him this is a horrible idea. Because it was, this was a HORRIBLE idea.

In that second where he reached his hand up to the doorbell, he hesitated. Maybe that was his sign. He hesitated meaning that he had to think. He had to think about Kurt. If he walked into this apartment it was going to be over. All that they had expierenced together, all that they mean to each other would be a lie.  It would just become memories instead of being apart of their furture. He clutched his phone in his other hand and took a few steps back. Hands shaking he went to dial Kurt’s number. Before he could hit the dial, he thought back to this morning, Kurt was busy. Kurt didn’t have time. Kurt never had time anymore, and regardless of if Kurt answered now or not…Kurt was still in New York and Blaine was still in Lima. Alone.

He was thinking too much, he took a deep breath and walked to the door with fake confidence. He rang the door bell and counted the seconds. “I wonder if I look okay?” He thought. Wait why did he care what he looked liked? This wasn’t Kurt, who he always strived to look good for. This was some random guy, some random….The door opened and Blaine blinked because in that second he wasn’t JUST some guy…he was a very attractive guy.

“Hey.” Eli said. “Thought you weren’t coming, and that’d be such a shame. Come in.”

Eli was confident, Eli was hot, Eli was older and Eli…Eli was not Kurt. So why did Blaine walk in the door like he had many times before. Like it was so normal.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Eli smiled with perfect teeth. Everything about Eli was perfect. His body, Blaine could see through his tight shirt. His apartment, decorated with football novelty that wasn’t too juvenile. He even had a bow tie collection neatly framed on the coffee table as decoration. He was in college at the local university majoring in polotics, so he was smart.  He was perfect.

Blaine for a second thought back to last Christmas. Back when he gave Kurt the promise ring. Back when he uttered those words, “…how perfectly IMPERFECT you are…”

“Hey sexy? You want a drink or not…or you want to skip right to the good stuff?” Eli interrupted his thoughts, as he walked toward him with no intention to stop. He placed his hands on Blaine’s waist, pulling him closer.  

He was taller than Kurt, clearly an inch or so. He leaned closer and Blaine had to force himself to look up into his eyes. He immediately looked away because looking into his eyes meant this was real. “I just love meetings like this…it’s so exciting.” Eli said biting his lip. Eli tugged him closer and Blaine could feel just how “excited” Eli was.

“What I don’t look like my profile picture?” Eli laughed before lowering his voice to a whisper. “Or you’ve never been with an older guy before?”

Blaine felt a lump in his throat, Kurt was older. Kurt was the ONLY other guy he had ever been with, and a month ago Kurt was the only guy he was content with EVER being with. But Blaine was alone with no one to talk to and there was a perfectly good looking guy in front of him. So why did he feel bad. Blaine shook his head and forced a smile.

“No drinks…”

“Fine. Bedroom then.” Eli finished grabbing Blaine’s hand. “Because you’re cute and I want you so bad right now.”