Kurt stared out the window of the limo as it made its way through the dark streets of New York. Blaine sat across from him, quiet and pensive, his permanent state of being these days. Kurt frowned. Things between them hadn’t been the same since Blaine’s night out. He was hurt; hurt that Blaine had forgotten him, hurt that Blaine had chosen to deal with his problems by getting drunk and potentially injuring his career rather than talking to Kurt; hurt that Blaine had gotten so drunk that he couldn’t understand that Kurt didn’t want to be intimate without Kurt having to shout it from the rooftops. They’d always been able to talk to each other about everything – Kurt couldn’t pinpoint when that had changed, and he silently lamented the loss.

Blaine had apologized, of course, and Kurt had accepted it – he knew Blaine was sorry. Unfortunately, Blaine being sorry wasn’t the point. Something had been lost between them and Kurt wasn’t sure how to get it back. Hell, sometimes he felt like Blaine was angry at him, even though he had no idea why.

The earlier conversation had been awkward and stilted, Julie leaving them with a mess that had to be cleaned up with time being of the essence. He sighed softly and felt Blaine’s gaze on his face. Kurt knew he had to cheer up and put some excitement in his expression; they were going to Trevor Live, they were going to perform an amazing song and it was going to be a good night - even if Kurt had to kill someone to make it happen.

“You are still excited to perform, aren’t you?” Blaine asked quietly.

“Yes,” Kurt answered simply, not wanting to get into anything before they would have to walk the red carpet. Kurt was very excited; it was just buried beneath everything else he was dealing with at the moment. Blaine gave him a hopeful smile, the first real smile Kurt had seen on his face in days. It was fleeting though, gone when Kurt couldn’t return it.

He eyed Blaine critically, looking over the suit he wore. Kurt had designed it himself, sewing it in secret when Blaine wasn’t around. He’d made his own as well, putting Blaine’s late nights to good use as he found ways to pass the time he spent alone. After all, he’d had a lot of free time on his hands. Blaine had been touched by the gift, gushing over it and hugging Kurt (almost timidly, as if Blaine was afraid to touch him and maybe he was). There had been guilt in Blaine’s expression as well, when he reached out to touch the delicate fabric when Kurt had presented it. It wasn’t discussed though, their very own elephant in the room.

The limo came to a stop and Kurt heard Charles get out. He steeled himself as best he could; he was an actor and it was show time. Kurt just hoped that none of the reporters would ask Blaine about Cooper or Blaine’s trip to the bar, because if so this night would go downhill fast.

Cameras started going off the moment the limo door opened in front of the theater, Blaine sliding out first and Kurt sliding out right after him. They linked hands and moved down the red carpet, letting the photographers have their fill. First they wanted just Blaine, then some of him and Blaine together, and then finally some of Kurt by himself. Kurt kind of wanted to pinch himself. Usually when he went to these kinds of things Blaine was the one they wanted pictures of. He’d never been the focus of them and had usually stepped back out of the limelight – not that he minded. It was exciting to actually be the one the cameras wanted for a change.

He and Blaine rejoined hands and moved down the carpet. Kurt let Blaine take the lead during the interviews, not saying much other than he was happy to be performing for such a worthy cause. The last stop on their way in was with Tyler Oakley and the live stream he had going.

Kurt thought it was going well (he knew there were probably thousands of fangirls watching and freaking out at home) as Blaine answered Tyler’s questions.

It was going too well, which was the only reason Kurt could come up with for what happened next.

“Blainey!” A loud voice boomed out. Kurt turned his head so fast he was sure he heard something crack, catching sight of Cooper right before the man descended on Blaine, swooping his brother up in a hug in front of the cameras. “Isn’t this nuts?”

“It’s something,” Kurt muttered, hoping no one noticed.

“Oh, my God,” Tyler managed. “You saw it happen here live, ladies and gents. Brothers reunited, right here on camera.” Cooper grinned and nudged Blaine’s shoulder. Kurt noticed it looked like Blaine’s smile had frozen in place.

“Cooper, it’s good to see you,” Kurt stepped forward.

“Kurt!” Cooper hugged him tightly.

“Listen, Blaine and I actually have to get inside and get backstage to get ready.” Kurt took Blaine’s arm, ushering him along. He hoped that Blaine would still be okay to perform.

*

Is it just me, or do the boys seem really stiff? Kurt especially.

Maybe he’s nervous?

IDK, they just seem off. I hope they’re okay.

OMFG, did Blaine just say Kurt designed both of their suits? That’s so cute, I might die. AND THEN HE SAID HE LETS KURT ‘DO WHATEVER HE WANTS TO HIM’ HELP ME OMG.

And they’re fucking amazing suits too. WHY IS HE NOT DESIGNING PROFESSIONALLY? SOMEONE NEEDS TO GET ON THAT. LIKE BLAINE APPARENTLY DOES. *coughs*

Having trouble breathing lol

Gahhhhhh, look at them all dressed up. Look at Kurt’s legs. Look at Blaine’s ass. HELP ME. THINK ABOUT THEM NAKED TOGETHER, I mean what you all were thinking it too thanks to Blaine.

I’m a terrible person because when I look at them, all I can think about is who tops.

Clearly it’s Blaine.

I’d bet my entire autograph collection that it’s Kurt.

CAN WE PLEASE NOT WANK ABOUT THAT AGAIN AND JUST ENJOY THE PRETTY. THEY’RE GOING TO SING TOGETHER AND WE ALL MIGHT DIE OKAY?

IS THAT FUCKING COOPER ANDERSON HUGGING BLAINE? ASDFASILDFHA;SLIASOIDLKJADF

COOPER HUGGING BLAINE WE HAVE OFFICIAL ANDERBROS PICTURES AND VIDEO.

#crying

A part of me wanted a comment about how awkward the reunion really was, and was that really the first time they'd met and it was on camera and was it just me or did Blaine and Kurt get out of there really quickly? #soaplivesarereal

#Joby may have gone to shit but at least our boys are still together

*

Blaine wanted to hit something really badly. He just didn’t know what else to do with everything that he was feeling. Between Cooper showing up and playing it up for the camera and Kurt still being distant after he’d forgotten the Winter Showcase and his trip to the bar… he wasn’t sure if he could do this.

Maybe he needed to go back to boxing.

“Blaine?” Kurt said gently. “Do you want to leave?”

Blaine sighed and shook his head after a moment. “No, this is for a good cause and people paid money to see us. They deserve to get what they paid for.”

“Okay,” Kurt agreed after a moment. “We should warm up then.” Blaine nodded and let Kurt lead him.

He spaced out during their warm up, trying hard not think about anything other than the performance. He could fall apart later when he was at home.

It was suddenly time for them to take the stage and Blaine found himself under the lights, eyes on him and Kurt as they stood in front of their microphones. The soft strands of the song started to play and Blaine came in on cue, singing.

The crown cheered and Blaine glanced at Kurt, who was staring at him. The love in his eyes was so, so clear and Blaine felt something just… break through the walls he’d put up inside him. This was what mattered – him and Kurt and their relationship. Screw his father, screw Cooper.

He had Kurt and Kurt was the only person he would ever need. He stepped toward Kurt at the end of the song, smiling when Kurt’s eyes widened. Blaine kissed him, an apology and a declaration all in one. The crowd went nuts; cheers and screams and catcalls ringing out.

*

OMGOGOMGOMGMGMAOMA HEEEEEEEEELP

THEY SANG COME WHAT MAY AND THEN THEY KISSED NEVER GETTING GOVER THIS

THOSE FUCKERS HOW CAN THEY DO THIS I WON’T SUERVIVE

I’m actually crying. There is a river on my face.

#Blaine and Kurt #and singing #and kissing #I am not okay

I NEED A FUCKING DOWNLOAD RIGHT NOW

Download

#God bless us everyone

*

“Blaine, I…” Kurt trailed off, staring at him breathlessly after the kiss. Blaine tugged his hand and Kurt remembered to bow before letting himself be led off stage. They headed for the stage door, finding it and walking for their limo instead of waiting for Charles to come find them.

The air between them was thick but it wasn’t tense like before. Something had come over Kurt during the song, staring into Blaine’s eyes. He really did love Blaine; he would always love Blaine, no matter what. He knew that Blaine felt the same. They could work through this.

Blaine opened the back door of the limo for Kurt when they reached it, waving at Charles to stay inside. Blaine told him to take them home and then put up the partition, looking at Kurt.

Blaine took his breath way, just by looking at him – he always had. Kurt smiled softly and Blaine smiled back and Kurt knew then that they were okay. They’d get passed this.

“How did I end up with someone as perfect as you?” Blaine breathed out, pressing his forehead against Kurt’s. Kurt laughed softly.

“Just lucky, I guess,” he murmured, kissing Blaine again. There was an edge to it this time, Blaine practically stealing his breath with the intensity of it.

“Can you be quiet?” Blaine whispered, pulling back. His hand drifted along Kurt’s thigh and Kurt inhaled sharply. This was the closest they’d come to any intimacy since that night, and he could hear the worry behind Blaine’s playfulness. “Cause I’d like you to get lucky too.”

Kurt couldn’t help it; he giggled. “Oh my God, you did not just say that.”

“I thought it was pretty smooth,” Blaine said. His fingers brushed lightly against Kurt’s half hard cock and Kurt stopped laughing, kissing Blaine fiercely.

“What am I going to do with you?” Kurt asked when they broke apart. He was breathless. Blaine grinned.

“I have a few ideas.”

*

“That suit you made me is still getting rave reviews, even though it’s been a few weeks,” Blaine said, coming into the kitchen where Kurt was standing. Blaine was scrolling through different articles on his phone, and glanced up at Kurt. His boyfriend looked frazzled, wisps of hair falling into his eyes and flour spread out of over his red apron.

“That’s amazing,” Kurt replied, not looking up.

“Do you need help?” Blaine offered. He couldn’t do much in the way of gourmet the way Kurt could, but he could follow directions.

“I’m fine,” Kurt muttered. “It’s just everyone’s going to be here in a few hours and this is our first Christmas hosting and…”

Blaine cut him off with a kiss. “It’ll be fine. It’s just your family and my parents.”

That had been a huge debate between them actually – Blaine had wanted to only invite his mother to Christmas with them, but Grace had stood firm that Carl would come too or she wouldn’t and Kurt had had to persuade Blaine to allow it. Both families had arrived the night before, checking into a nearby hotel.

“What was that for?” Kurt asked breathlessly when Blaine pulled back.

“Because you look adorable and you’re kind of freaking out,” Blaine replied. “Let me help.”

Kurt let out a breath and then smiled. “Okay.”

“Thank you,” Blaine said, smiling as Kurt put him to work - anything to keep his mind off the fact that his father would be in their condo later that afternoon.

*

Kurt’s hands flailed of their own accord when the doorman buzzed. “They’re here!” he shouted to Blaine, who was still in the bedroom getting dressed.

“Let them in then,” he called back, sounding amused. Kurt resolved to tease him later or possibly tickle him because Blaine had been ribbing him all day. It was nice to see Blaine in a good mood. He only hoped it would last.

His parents were the first ones there, Finn and Rachel following a few minutes later. Kurt took their coats and set out hors d’ oeuvres while everyone got settled. Blaine came out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. Kurt watched as he greeted everyone with a smile and a hug.

The doorman buzzed again and Kurt knew it would be Blaine’s family. He moved toward the door to let them in after a few minutes, pulling the door open before stopping short.

There, standing behind Carl and Grace, was Cooper.

*

Blaine froze at the sight of Kurt ushering his parents and Cooper inside. He’d grudgingly agreed to let his father come – he’d never agreed that Cooper would be allowed to be here.

“Little bro!” Cooper exclaimed, moving toward him. “Heard you were throwing a soiree and I just had to be here.” He hugged Blaine and Blaine went stiff. “So Kurt, what’s for dinner?” Cooper asked after letting go.

Blaine was so upset he couldn’t even form words. Cooper hadn’t been invited. Had their father just brought him without asking? Blaine shook his head before he turned and went into the bedroom, shutting the door silently.
He moved over to the bed and sat down on it, his thoughts churning. He couldn’t believe his parents had done this to him again, in his own home no less.

“You really don’t like me, do you?”

Blaine’s head jerked up and he saw Cooper standing in the doorway to the bedroom. Of course Cooper, attention hog extraordinaire, had followed him. Blaine just clenched his jaw and looked down at his hands.

“What did I do that was so wrong, exactly?” Cooper asked, moving into the room and shutting the door. He joined Blaine on the edge of the bed.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Blaine muttered.

“See, I think we need to,” Cooper told him. “Because I know we got a crappy hand when it comes to fathers, but we’re brothers and I want us to act like it.”

“You can’t just pop into my life and start acting like my best friend,” Blaine snapped. “You don’t know me. You don’t know anything about my life. To have you just show up and start treating me like we’re BBF’s – you didn’t even give me time to get used to the idea of you.”

Cooper was staring at him with a serious expression on his face and for once, Blaine felt like maybe his brother was listening to him, instead of acting cheerfully oblivious (though Blaine wasn’t sure that was actually an act).

“You’re right,” Cooper agreed after a moment, his voice soft and serious. Blaine hadn’t been sure his brother could be completely serious until that moment. It upset him more than it probably should have.

“You have no idea,” Blaine shouted. Blaine wanted to hate him but Cooper was being so nice. “My whole life, I felt like I’ve never been good enough for him and now I know that I wasn’t exaggerating it in my head like everyone told me I was. He really was wishing he had a different son. You.”

“Who, Dad?” Cooper asked, looking taken aback by Blaine’s hostility.

“Who do you think? Of course, Dad,” Blaine answered, his voice cracking. Tears formed in his eyes and he blinked rapidly, trying not to let them fall. “Do you even know what he put me through because of you? Nothing I did measured up. He wanted the perfect son or what he thought was the perfect son… and it was never, ever going to be me and…”

Blaine trailed off, breathing hard, his fists clenched. He wished he had a punching bag about now, because he really wanted to hit something.

“And here you are, the perfect straight son he always wanted,” Blaine finally finished. “So what am I now?”

“You’re my brother,” Cooper said. “I’m sorry if our father was an ass but that’s on him, not me. It’s not my fault and you blaming me for it isn’t fair.” Cooper smiled at him, at odds with his words. “And I’m not perfect, as much as I aspire toward it daily – but that’s between you and me. My adoring fans can never know.”

Blaine let out a shaky laugh, ducking his head. Cooper put an arm around Blaine’s shoulder tentatively, but Blaine made no move to pull away.

“I’m sorry that we didn’t know each other sooner, but I want to get to know you now if you’ll let me,” Cooper continued.

He couldn’t believe he’d just spouted all of that off at Cooper and Cooper still wanted to get to know him. Blaine slowly put his arm around Cooper’s waist, because it felt like all the things Kurt and his mother had been saying to him for the last month were finally sinking in. If he actually got to know Cooper a little bit, maybe he’d find Cooper wasn’t as awful as he thought. Blaine really, really hated it that they were right.

“I’d like that,” Blaine said. They sat like that for a moment, and then Blaine went to pull away.

“Wait.” Cooper stopped him. “I just want to remember what I’m feeling right now in case I need it for a role later.”

Blaine snorted and then stood up.

There was a soft knock on the door and then Kurt poked his head in. “Everything okay in here?”

“Everything’s fine,” Blaine murmured.

“Dinner’s ready, whenever you two want to come out.”

Blaine nodded, smiling what felt like his first true smile in weeks.

*

Dinner passed without any major outburst, something Kurt considered a win. His father filled them all in on his work in DC and Cooper entertained them all with a million jokes and even Rachel was on her best (if star struck) behavior. At one point, Cooper had even started giving them all acting pointers (which Kurt dutifully had written down on a napkin until Blaine had nudged him and asked him why he would do such a thing. Kurt didn’t know why, Cooper’s advice was golden).

Presents were exchanged after dinner and Kurt enjoyed the new sweater Blaine had bought him -though it would never compare to the year before and the promise ring he’d received - and Blaine seemed to like the vinyl records Kurt had given him if the quick kiss Blaine had pressed to his cheek was any indication. His dad and Carole had brought him all the old Christmas ornaments, including the one that he’d made out of his mother’s perfume bottle. He’d nearly cried when opening it. They’d also included a spa day for him and Blaine which Kurt couldn’t wait to schedule.

Once the presents were cleared away and dessert was served and eaten, Blaine’s family headed out. Blaine hugged Cooper before he left, a real hug, and Kurt nearly cried at the sight.

Needless to say, Kurt was in a great mood right up until his dad asked him to sit down.

“What’s going on?” Kurt asked, settling down next to Blaine. His father and Carole looked serious.

“There’s no easy way for me to say this, so I’m just gonna come out and say it,” his father said and Kurt grabbed for Blaine’s hand automatically. “I have cancer.”

Kurt couldn’t quite seem to catch his breath and the room spun a little.

“What?” Finn said, looking shocked.

“Prostate cancer,” his father continued. “They caught it early, so I don’t want you guys to worry about me. I just wanted you to know.”

“Dad,” Kurt managed to get out.

“I’m gonna be okay, Kurt,” his father insisted. “I wouldn’t say that if I didn’t believe it.”

Kurt nodded woodenly. He kept up his brave front until his family had left for the night; he couldn’t bear to let his dad see him cry. Once his father, Carole, Finn, and Rachel had departed, he sank down into a chair in the living room, his mind whirling.

“Kurt?” Blaine said his name softly. Kurt glanced up at him, his heart aching.

He tried to reply, to tell Blaine that he was okay so Blaine would stop giving him that worried look, but the only sound that came out of his mouth was a sob. Kurt raised a hand to his mouth, trying to hold it back, but it was to no avail. Blaine tugged Kurt’s s free hand and lead him into the other room, the tears flowing down Kurt’s cheeks blinding him.

Blaine’s eyes looked wet as well but Kurt didn’t know what exactly he was crying over, not that it mattered. Blaine gently nudged him down onto the bed, slowly removing Kurt’s shoes, then socks and finally his dress shirt and slacks. Before Kurt realized he’d moved away, Blaine was back with his pajamas, helping him into them. Kurt tried to focus but he couldn’t even see passed his tears.

Blaine helped him shuffle into bed, Kurt’s head finding the pillow, Blaine pulling the blankets up. There was a moment where Kurt was alone, the only sound his ragged breathing, but then Blaine was back. Blaine’s arms wrapped around him, holding Kurt tightly as he whispered soothing words into Kurt’s ear.

Kurt wanted to believe Blaine when he said it would be okay, but he knew how things like this could turn out. He’d lost a parent. He’d been down this road with his dad before, and he couldn’t help but feel like everything in that moment was a lie.