Kurt's Wednesday the following week began with a visit to Miss Pillsbury. He'd opted to get to school early and meet with her in the mornings because that promised a finite amount of time spent in her office and it kept counseling from cutting into his social life. She'd asked him how his week was going, and then he'd been able to launch the session off into a discussion of her color palate, which she wore well, but which he thought she could easily expand. They talked colors, clothes, and style for the entire 45 minutes before the session was up and never once brought up Karofsky or bullying. Kurt knew he wasn't being productive, dancing around the subject for three whole sessions now, but he felt very smug about himself for it, and went back to anticipating his date that afternoon with Blaine.

            He stayed behind after school a few extra minutes, hanging out in the parking lot with Mercedes, carefully watching the doors in case Karofsky reared his ugly head, and made it to Lima Bean only a few moments before Blaine, stepping out of his car as Blaine pulled up.

            Because they'd hugged previously, Blaine felt confident enough to go ahead and wrap his arms around Kurt's shoulders as a greeting after catching up to Kurt in the parking lot. Kurt hugged back, still nervous about the DVD situation, but overjoyed about the touch. As they slowly pulled away from each other, Blaine watched Kurt's slightly parted lips and wondered how far across the line it would be to just move into those lips, just to taste them. Instead they walked to the door side by side. Blaine held it open for Kurt, acting the part of the proper gentleman.

            At the front of the line Blaine ordered for them both and Kurt noticed that Blaine had slyly memorized his coffee order. He didn't let Kurt pay, then carried both coffees to a table by the window. It was just lightly snowing outside, covering the parked cars and the sidewalks with a powdery dusting. As they took off their scarves and draped them over the backs of their chairs, Blaine gave Kurt a long, sideways glance and said, "So I watched that disk."

            Kurt's mouth fell open, and he very slowly lowered himself into his chair. He swallowed twice, frowned, looked outside, brought the back of his hand to his mouth while he cleared his throat, then picked up his coffee and held it in one hand. He finally replied, "You did?" and it sounded like it got tangled up in his vocal chords and didn't entirely make it out.

            Blaine also sat down, his eyes were on the table. "I got to see the part of that song I missed. ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart.'"

            Kurt brought his coffee to his lips like he was taking a sip, but he couldn't swallow, so he just held the cup and stared at the falling snow like it was the most fascinating thing in the entire universe. His temples were throbbing from the tension.

            Blaine looked at Kurt. He could see the redness in his cheeks, and the panic in his eyes and were it ran across his forehead in tight lines. He wished Kurt's hands were down on the table so he could reach across and grab them. "I loved it," he assured him, softly.

            Kurt looked over. Blaine's eyes had fallen back onto the table, so those long, dark eyelashes had fallen over his eyes. He set down his cup. He took the time to focus on keeping his voice even before responding, "Really?"

            There was no way for Blaine to be sure who Kurt had been singing that song for, or about, and having only come in at the end, he had originally imagined it was just practice for Regionals or something, but getting to hear the whole song had sent shivers down his spine. It made him believe what he'd never let himself imagine before: that Kurt was singing it for him. It was silly, but what if it were true? There was no mistaking the cry for help in the vocals, and what if he could be the one to save Kurt from fear and pain for the rest of forever? He wanted to be the hero. Kurt's hero. He wanted to smile at that soft, blushing, nervous face and tell him he would never have to be afraid again.

            "Absolutely," he responded.

            The corner of Kurt's lip tugged and then he very slowly asked, "What else was on that disk, if you don't mind me asking?"

            Blaine grinned, "Wow. You must have something really embarrassing you don't want getting out."

            "No! Nothing like that." Kurt took an actual sip of coffee this time, but it was still too hot and he regretted it. His hands were shaking, so he set down the cup again. "I was wondering because, Rachel gave me a disk too."

            "Oh?"

            "And... not all of it was... worth reliving."

            Blaine raised his eyebrows, thought back, and then nodded, "Ah. You mean the part after ‘Baby it's Cold Outside.'"

            Kurt felt a huge lump set itself down over his heart. He closed his eyes then blinked rapidly and looked back outside. He set his hands in his lap under the table and picked at his fingernails.

            Blaine quickly added, "Well, for the record, the duet itself sounded amazing. I was thrilled I got to relive it. We sound great together. Also your duet with Rachel. It's just... your voice gives me chills every time I hear it. You're incredible."

            "Thank you... and I'm sorry," Kurt whispered, then tried to continue more strongly, "About the bit on the end. I'm sorry you had to endure it again..." He meant to continue, but his voice broke on the last word and he fell silent and pressed a finger to the edge of his eye to preemptively stop a tear. He'd watched it over and over again, and it hurt just as bad every time, especially seeing Blaine sink to the stage floor.

            "Hey! What? Kurt... don't," Blaine reached across the table, but there was nothing to grab, and Kurt was leaning back in his chair, guarded, and as far away as possible without leaving. "Don't be sorry. Not at all. You didn't do anything wrong. You were bullied, and you were hurt, and I pried, and then I couldn't do anything to help you. I'm sorry, Kurt. You trusted me and I blew it."

            Kurt shook his head and barely caught another tear as it slipped down his face. The snow outside was a good thick blanket by now. Blaine was so earnest and kind, but Kurt felt like crap about it. "I didn't want you to see it... again. I mean, you were there the first time. I wish she hadn't sent you that disk."

            "...I don't... I'm glad she did," he said slowly. Kurt snorted, and Blaine leaned forward, "No, I'm serious. I don't care about that part at the end. I feel awful about it, but it just reminds me that I have so much to fix... between us."

            "Us" rang in Kurt's head. He looked Blaine in the eye.

            "Kurt, that DVD was the best gift ever. No, really, I love it. I love it because, now I get to hear you sing whenever I want to. I don't have to imagine your voice over Stevie Nicks' when I want to remember what you sound like. Which is good, because I'm sure I'd have gotten tired of "The Edge of Seventeen" at some point." Kurt gave a short chuckle and shot him an inquisitive look that made Blaine smile, "Better than that, I get to hear your voice together with mine whenever I want to, I get to remember that I did sing with you once, and... that we sound amazing together."

            Kurt smile and wiped his cheek again. Blaine rummaged through his bag and brought out a packet of tissues to offer him while he replied, "We do have a certain harmonic chemistry..."

            "We have more chemistry than that," Blaine wanted to say, but he set the tissue packet on the table after Kurt accepted one and sipped his coffee to stop himself.

            "...Even with the poor sound quality. But I'm still sorry that I stormed out, that day."

            "You didn't storm. You had every right," Blaine cut in.

            "No. It was supposed to be about you. I promised to help-"

            "You did. And I enjoyed singing with you so much more than singing with that girl. Kurt, you did nothing wrong by me."

            Kurt worked his jaw for a moment. Blaine was trying so hard to be so nice-although he was right; that girl had been awful- and he was so charming. "Well you'll be happy to know I won't be needing to storm-I mean, walk out, of anywhere... anymore."

"Oh?"

"Yes. They've sent me to mandatory counseling. Like I need it..." He made a face.

            Blaine paused. He wished he was close enough to Kurt. He wished he knew enough about the situation to understand why it now required counseling. That bully had kissed Kurt, which Blaine couldn't deny struck him with a churning cocktail of jealousy and rage, and it had affected Kurt so badly. Blaine wished he knew more about it, or that he'd acted before and done something about it right away. He wished he knew more about Kurt so he could help him. "Is it helping?"

            Kurt shrugged. "So far I've avoided talking about it all three sessions. So I suppose that's a ‘no.'"

            "...And the bully? Karof-ska-vich? Is he getting counseling too?"

            Kurt looked surprised, corrected the name, and then nodded. "Yeah, he is. Not at the same time-"

            "No, of course not."

            "-But it'll be good for him. Actually, the school is suddenly on an anti-bullying kick. I think it was all Mr. Schue, our Glee director," Blaine nodded to indicate that he remembered him, "I think it was all his idea. They're raising awareness, talking to the jocks about picking on kids, there's even going to be an anti-bullying assembly this week."

            "That's great!" Blaine was truly impressed. His old school had never lifted a finger to go as far as McKinley was going for Kurt. It seemed like Kurt just inspired people to do the right thing. Unlike Blaine, who had lain bloody on a sidewalk outside his old high school, spent a week in the hospital, and then been told he'd provoked the attack. For Blaine it subtly reinforced something in the back of his mind; that he could get the shit beaten out of him, but he would never mean as much to anyone as this boy seemed to mean to absolutely everyone who walked into his life. It reinforced his belief that Kurt was the most incredible person he'd ever met.

            Kurt raised his eyebrows sarcastically, "Yeah. It's great. I'm supposed to come up with a list of topics for them to cover at the assembly. Go me."

            Blaine shook the thoughts he'd been piling up the moment Kurt's gaze raised from the table to meet his. He took a sip of his coffee and asked, "What have you come up with so far?"

            Kurt frowned, "I haven't... I'm not actually going to do it."

            "Why not? This is a great opportunity, you can stop the violence, Kurt, not only for you, but for everyone."

            Kurt went back to picking his fingernails. "I guess I'm ashamed."

            "Of what?"

            "That... it has to be me. That I've got this big target sign painted on my back and other people have to sit and listen through this special assembly because I got terrified."

            "Kurt..."

            Kurt cleared his throat, "And I know people try to tell me it isn't my fault, but... every time they do it just sounds like they're saying, ‘But hey! You brought this on yourself.'... I know it's important, I just wish I didn't have to be the one to deal with it." He wiped a tear away again and felt ridiculous for crying all the time. "I'm just... not confident enough, I guess," he whispered.

            "No, I know what you mean," Blaine agreed. "It's like everyone is sympathetic, but they just think that if you're, you know," he did air quotes, "'choosing' to be gay, you're life's just gonna suck. But you, Kurt, you have people who seriously care about you. You can't pass this by."

            "Yeah, but..."

            Blaine sat up straighter. "My school's anti-bullying policy was to have a box at the front desk that you could slip anonymous complaints into. That was it. That was the entire prevention program." Blaine looked around, then leaned in, lowering his voice and looked at Kurt with the darkest look Kurt had ever seen on his face. "Kurt... I got beaten within an inch of my life before I realized that some box no one ever read wasn't enough."

            Kurt felt cold. "What? Blaine, you..."

            He averted his gaze out the window into the snow. "You have a chance, Kurt, to really make a difference, and to be safe without transferring to an expensive academy. You need to take it. I...I really don't want to see you get hurt anymore."

            Kurt was silent for a long time. He couldn't stop himself from imagining Karofsky's enormous fist colliding with the side of Blaine's face, with his eye socket, with his ribs. He couldn't shake the image of that beautiful boy doubled over in pain, or lying, mummified, on a hospital bed. Kurt felt stupid. He was so stupid. His problems weren't as bad as that. How could Blaine not think he was acting like a big baby? He'd never been punched before. But then he remembered, until that week before Christmas break... he'd never been kissed either. Not one that counted for anything-not one from a boy. He'd wanted Blaine to be his first kiss. He still, more than anything, wished Blaine could be the second. He wished he was brave enough to shake off his own fears and be the hero who could wipe that residual pain from Blaine's memory. Right then, he could only work up the courage to murmur, "Okay."

            After a moment of stunned and contemplative silence, Blaine reclined in his chair, then leaned forward again and asked, "Kurt, would you... um. Do you think I could... could I ... hold your hand?"

            The boy in question jumped slightly, and then very robotically set his right hand on the table, palm up. Blaine reached for it and ran his fingertips lightly across Kurt's outstretched fingers, making them curl on themselves, then across the palm before wrapping the soft hand up in his own. Kurt's eyelashes fluttered for a moment. Blaine squeezed, and smiled lopsidedly.

            "Blaine, I'm sorry..."

            He shrugged, eyes fixed on their joined hands. "Don't worry about it, it was a long time ago." He liked the way Kurt said his name, hanging onto the L and sighing through it.

            "No, I really am," Kurt squeezed back. "You're just such the... knight in shining armor. I never imagined..."

            Blaine gave him a coy look, "Well I do take boxing. Now. After."

            Kurt couldn't hold back an embarrassed giggle. He added that to the list of things he definitely wanted to see: Blaine dripping in sweat, punching a bag with the muscles in his bare arms pulsing with every movement. He shifted in his seat slightly, "Really?"

            "Yeah. It's good anger management."

            "I don't believe you ever get angry."

            Blaine ran a finger along the inside of Kurt's wrist and winked, "I have a mean side."

            In the pause Kurt realized suddenly what this was: they were holding hands in a coffee shop. He and this gorgeous boy from a private academy, who kept going out with him despite how annoying and difficult he undoubtly had been being, were holding hands in a coffee shop while snow fell outside. He was dating, dating, the most beautiful, brown eyed boy he'd ever seen. Just the touch from those slightly calloused hands sent a tingle through his body.

            With his left hand, Kurt reached into his bag and pulled out a spare pad of paper, "How about we work on the list together?"

            Blaine smiled and looked up at him. The dark look was gone and replaced with the puppy eyes Kurt remembered from before Christmas. "I would love to."

            They discussed ideas, and Kurt wrote down each one they settled on, for over half an hour steadily. At some point their hands had slipped apart, but their heads were leaned together over the paper and it felt just as close. Then Kurt's phone started buzzing in his bag. He'd decided to ignore it, even though the buzzing lasted too long to be a text message, but after it had gone on for over a full minute at intervals, he and Blaine could no longer pretend they weren't hearing it.

            He winced, "Sorry. Do you mind if I check that?"

            Blaine shook his head, "No, please do."

            While Kurt dug into his bag to retrieve his phone, Blaine picked up the pad and looked over the list they'd created.

• Ban slushies
• Secure dumpsters
• More teachers watching the hallways between classes
• Teachers watching parking lots before and after school
• Open peer counseling or discussion groups
• Bullying Awareness week
• Start a PFLAG branch
• Ban dodgeball

            He smiled at their progress. Some of them were very little and localized, but they were on to something. He watched Kurt frown at his phone and then answer, "Yes, Finn?"

            Kurt's expression changed as he listened to his response. "Rachel? ... SHE WHAT? She ran away?!... Ran out?... Finn, why are you so stupid?... No! Why would you do that?..." he stopped and looked at his phone and scrolled through it. Blaine was concerned, but tried to seem unassuming, so he watched the snow fall. It was starting to pile up and one of the Lima Bean workers was headed outside to shovel the walk. "She did...What? No... I'm going to call her now.... I can't believe you, Finn!...Why would you... No. Let's talk about this later...I'm going to call her."

            He hung up and looked up at Blaine, who looked back, and raised his eyebrows. Kurt's face was drained. "I'm so sorry, Blaine. I think I may need to chase after Rachel."

            Blaine nodded. Whatever was happening, and much as he'd rather keep Kurt all to himself, he definitely understood that friends came first. "Of course. Totally. Whatever you need to do," he smiled, hoping that sounded sincere. Kurt was already raising the phone back up to his ear.

            "Rachel?... I know! I'm so sorry! I'm on a, I mean, I'm with Blaine... No! That's okay... I know. He's a moron...I'm so sorry, Rachel..." Kurt began sticking one arm into his jacket, throwing an apologetic look across the table at Blaine. "Stay there...I'm on my way... I'll see you soon, dear. ...I know. I'll be there."

He hung up, pulling on his coat, and Blaine stood up. "Is she alright?"

            Kurt sighed, "My stupid step-bother just dumped her."

            "Oh, geez."

"I'm so sorry to run out like this, Blaine."

"No, don't worry, it's fine. Being there for your friend is more important."

            Kurt buttoned his coat, glanced at the snow, and slung on his bag. "I wouldn't leave but... she doesn't really... I mean, you've met her. Other people don't really even try to tolerate her, but I think she needs someone right now. I've never heard her so upset."

            Blaine reached out and touched Kurt's shoulder. "Do you need anything?"

            Kurt shook his head, "No, just... I'll make this up to you." He touched Blaine's hand where it rested on his shoulder, then let it go as he turned to walk away.

            Blaine nodded. They didn't hug, they just waved to each other as Kurt hurried out of the café, with a glance back over his shoulder at Blaine, who was gathering up his own things slowly.

            Kurt made it to Rachel's house, after a text to his father that his plans had changed, and one of Rachel's two dads opened the door when he knocked.

            "Hey, Kurt. I'm glad you came over."

            "Hello, Mr. Berry. Is Rachel okay?"

            He smiled the knowing, fatherly look, "I suspect it's boys." He rolled his eyes, and Kurt smiled in response. Apparently the fathers didn't know yet. Honestly it didn't make sense. Finn had been crazy about her the last time they'd spoken, which was admittedly a few days ago since Finn was terse at best during dinner and too sleepy to speak during the short time they were together in the mornings before school. Whatever changed his mind didn't make sense at all to Kurt.

            "Can I go up and see her?"

            "Oh absolutely! Go right on up. Oh! Wait, here, bring her a cup of water, would you? It'll make her feel better."

            So Kurt ascended the stairs to Rachel's room, passing baby picture after adorable baby picture of her adorning the stairway, tall glass of water in hand, and knocked twice on Rachel's door. It was silent inside, so he leaned an ear against the door and said, "Rachel? It's Kurt."

            Immediately the door flew open and she yanked him inside, causing some of the water to slop onto the carpet. She shut the door quickly. Already her hair was a mess, her eyes were red and puffy, and her nose was a runny red swamp. When she wrapped her arms around him and thanked him for coming, he wished he hadn't been wearing one of his favorite jackets.

            "Yeesh! It must have been bad. Here, take the water," he said, pushing her off him a little bit so he could remove his jacket and shoes and set down his bag in a position of safety.

            Rachel downed the entire glass of water and then hiccupped. "You're the best friend... ever, Kurt," she stammered, then her lip trembled and she flung herself, cup and all, face first onto her bed. She was such a drama queen. Kurt reminded himself he'd just left a date with Blaine and driven in the snow to comfort her, so he shouldn't be rolling his eyes. He sat down on the edge of her bed and patted her back.

            "So... what happened?"

             She wailed a bit into the pink duvet and then sat up and said, "Finn dumped me!" and pulled Kurt's shoulder to meet her weepy face. Kurt snagged a box of tissues off the nightstand and saved his shirt by slipping one under her face before it touched down.

            "Okay...I know that part. What happened?"

            "I don't know!" she sniffed, blew her nose into the tissue, then accepted a replacement from him. "I thought he loved me, and I had him take me out to see the new art gallery, and everything was good and we were holding hands and then he was all like," she sat up straighter and lowered her voice to do an impression of Finn, "I'm sorry, Rachel. I think we need to break up!"

            "That's it?" Kurt was still confused.

            "I know! I mean, I was trying so hard to not be annoying, and to listen to what he likes, and I just..." she started crying even harder again and was shaking too hard to speak for several minutes. Kurt wrapped his arms around her and tried to make comforting noises. Finally she stuttered through a breath and could speak again, "I just... I don't understand why he had to dump me now. It's almost Valentine's Day. He couldn't have waited?"

            Valentine's Day was several weeks away, but Kurt hugged her tighter. He'd never had a Valentine before, and he knew how much that hurt, especially when you thought there would be someone and suddenly the world dropped out and it turned out there wasn't.

            "He didn't even have a reason," she continued. "It was just, ‘Let's break up!' and then he left me there!"

            "Wait a minute," Kurt cut in, "He told me you ran off."

            "..." she blew her nose again, "Well, I did, but that was after he just stood there staring at me blankly for about five minutes, and I didn't know what to say. He's probably back with Quinn again..."

            Kurt held her out at shoulder length, "Hold on there, Rachel. You're hurt. You're upset. Finn's a brainless, idiot oaf who just happens to be incredibly attractive," Rachel let out a small laugh, sniffled, and then went back to wiping falling tears off her cheeks. "But let's not get ahead of ourselves."

            "Has he said anything?" she asked, hopefully.

            Kurt wished he'd paid more attention to his step brother recently. If he had, maybe there would have been signs. There had just been other things going on, other things to ignore or worry about. "Sorry. Until he called me today I thought he was still completely into you."

            "It must be Quinn then. She's so beautiful and he just can't resist. Who could? Why go for someone like me when you could have someone as perfect as her?"

            "Whoa there now!" Kurt stood up, "Let's stop the pity party right there. You're way too big a star to be getting jealous of Quinn Fabray. Just think of how much else you have going for you!"

            "Yeah? Like what?"

            "For one thing, you're talented, Rachel. For another, he chose you over Quinn in the end."

            "Yeah, because she was having Puck's baby."

            "That's not the point," Kurt grabbed a hair brush off her vanity and settled himself behind her to work out the tangled mat she'd worked into her usually impeccably combed hair. "The point is, whatever reason he had for wanting to break up with you, it's his problem. It has nothing to do with you, because despite your personality and your fashion sense, he still wanted to be with you."

She blew her nose again. "Did you know he slept with Santana though? He told me he hadn't, but he had. Can you believe that?"

Kurt paused, "...You didn't know about that?"

Rachel gasped, "NO! You knew? Did everyone know? Why would he lie about that?"

"Alright, slow down," he resumed brushing, "It still meant more to him when he kissed you. That means everything, doesn't it? And just so you know, I've gotten over being jealous about it. You are forgiven."

            He smiled, meaning it as a joke, because it had been quite a while since he'd felt more than a healthy amount of brotherly affection toward Finn. Rachel took it seriously, "Oh yeah, I'm so sorry, Kurt. I forgot you've never been kissed."

            Kurt stopped brushing. He every muscle in his face pulled taut and his hands shook slightly. Dave Karofsky's face, the smell of Old Spice, the sticky pressure of those lips against his, and his head trapped against the locker and between clammy, rough hands. It had been easy not to think about it during break, but the memory came with a churn from his stomach and he felt light headed, like he might be sick.

            Rachel noticed the pause and gasped. "Oh my god. No way, you have?" she turned around excitedly, but missed the ghostly white drain of his face. She grabbed his hands. "Spill! Was it Blaine? Oh my god, did he kiss you today on your date? I dragged you away from that! I'm so sorry, Kurt!"

            As she sniffed loudly, then squeezed and shook his hands, hairbrush and all, he regained control of himself enough to steadily say, "No, it wasn't Blaine."

            "What? I thought you liked Blaine. Who was it then? Kurt! Why don't you ever tell me anything?"

            Kurt pulled his hands away and stood up, putting on false enthusiasm, "Oh hey! How about we watch a movie!"

            Rachel wiped around her eyes again with her fingertips and then sat up straighter on the edge of the bed. "Oh no! You aren't getting away that easy. It was Blaine, wasn't it? Oh! I'm so happy for you, Kurt!"

            Kurt clenched his teeth and turned away from her, kneeling down to look at the small collection of DVDs she kept exclusively in her room. "Let's watch Moulin Rouge, how does that sound?"

            She got up and walked behind him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders with a teasing "Kuuu~rt! It was totally Blaine."

            He tried to shake her off, but she was hanging heavily on his back with her cheek touching his. He took a deep breath. "No. It wasn't Blaine. I wish it was, but it wasn't, okay?"

            She let go of him and sat back on her heels, confused. "Well then, who was it?"

            "It doesn't matter."

            "Yeah it does! I want to know! Please? I'm miserable here; I at least need to live vicariously through your love life."

            "There's nothing to live vicariously through," he assured her, digging his fingernails into his palms.

            "Why? What happened?"

            He kept his eyes trained on the DVDs for several long seconds, working the knot from his throat and trying to decide what to say. How long could he keep this in? She would gossip. It would ruin Karofsky's life. It wasn't right to do that to anyone, not ever. Not even though he'd had to skip gym twice already and hide in the choir room because he couldn't bring himself to enter the locker room, and not even though he felt like he might puke if he so much as thought the name again. It was different. He could escape all of this, but Karofsky couldn't escape that he was gay. He started to turn around, but realized there was a tear escaping down his cheek and stopped himself mid-turn to wipe it away.

            "Kurt... what's wrong?" Rachel asked.

            "Nothing. Nothing's wrong. It was just something, I didn't mean for it to happen, but it did, and Blaine knows-"

            "Blaine knows?" Rachel was completely confused.

            "-And I'm seeing Miss Pillsbury now and it's okay." He tried to smile to show her it was okay, but his heart was beating fast and more tears were trying to escape. Rachel slowly reached for the tissue box and handed it to him.

            "Oh my god... Kurt..." she breathed deeply, evenly, while he wiped the tears away and looked determinedly away from her. She searched back through her memory of everything he'd gone through over the last month. "Was it Karofsky?" Kurt's breath hitched and he closed his eyes. "Oh god... Kurt! Is that what he did to you?"

            He sucked in his cheeks and bit his lip. He could just shake his head, get up and leave. He could drive through the snow, all the way to wherever Blaine had gone off to after leaving Lima Bean, he could race into those strong, Warbler arms, and he could feel safe. He wouldn't have to face up to this again... But the reality was; Blaine wasn't his boyfriend. They'd only just held hands for the very first time and it was as likely out of pity as anything else. They'd only known each other a month. Here he was seated across from Rachel Berry and her puffy, red eyes and if it was so important to him to be there for her that he'd leave a date with Blaine, maybe he owed her the truth. He nodded once, took another tissue, and whispered, "I know it's just stupid."

            "No!" Rachel stood up, "That's not stupid! Kurt, that's horrible! He harassed you for being gay and then he turns out gay himself? And he stole your first kiss? Does he know how important to you that is?!"

            "Please don't tell anyone," Kurt gasped.

            "Are you kidding? I'm going to tell everyone! If he thinks he can get away with this then he's dead wrong. He hurt you, Kurt! He made you miserable. He's getting a taste of his own goddamn medicine. And Blaine knows about this? What's he done? He should have been over there beating Karofsky up! You know what? Finn should have been-"

            Kurt grabbed her hand and pulled her back down onto the floor in front of him. He was shaking his head. "No. No, you can't, Rachel. You can't tell anyone. He's getting help. He's in counseling. You can't ruin his life like that."

            "He ruined yours!" Rachel shot back.

            "No, I'm fine..."

            She reached out and touched his cheek. "No. You're not. You're holding together because you're you, but Kurt, you've been a mess... ever since it happened. You've needed someone to help you."

            Kurt closed his eyes and leaned into her. It was a weird feeling, both like everything was messed up and he was the worst person in the world, and like a huge weight had been lifted and the skies were clearing up again. He hugged her and she ran her hand up and down his back.

            "Why hasn't Blaine done anything about this?" she asked again.

            He pulled back and shrugged. "Because I asked him not to," he admitted. "He shouldn't have to deal with this."

            "Of course he should! He's your boyfriend. I mean, mine up and chucked me, but I'm pretty sure revenge is exactly what they're for."

            Kurt smiled sadly, "No he's not. At least, I mean, I want him to be, but we aren't official yet."

            Rachel cupped his cheek in her hand and rubbed it with her thumb. "Is that why? Because of Karofsky... is that why you won't make it official yet?"

            Kurt blinked. "Maybe... I mean. I don't know. I don't think Blaine..."

            "I think Blaine would like to," Rachel cut in. "I know he likes you, Kurt. And you like him." Kurt nodded. "Well then?"

            He looked away from her. "No, not yet. I'm not ready."

            "Valentine's Day then? So... so I can live through you, since I won't be having one of my own."

            Kurt smiled, "Okay. And thanks. And please don't tell anyone about... about what happened."

She frowned, but finally nodded. "Okay... but I think you should."

He shrugged and took another tissue. She took one as well and they both wiped the tear streaks off their faces. "What a pair we make, huh?"

            Rachel grinned and agreed. They both had puffy eyes and runny noses that were chapping their skin. "Let's go wash our faces, then we can watch a movie and you can help get this knot out of my hair, okay?" she asked.

            "Okay."

She kissed Kurt's cheek, then they helped each other to their feet, taking turns at the sink in her private bathroom and helping each other apply moisturizers, then deciding to go all out and do masks. He called home, then spent the night at Rachel's. There was over a half-foot of snow on the ground when he left early to shower and change before school.