July 22, 2012, 5:32 p.m.
Don't Look Back
Don't Look Back: Chapter 12
E - Words: 6,624 - Last Updated: Jul 22, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 13/13 - Created: Jun 18, 2012 - Updated: Jul 22, 2012 1,331 0 0 0 1
Kurt fell asleep slowly, the bed a little too big and a lot too empty. It had taken an eternity to finally get comfortable enough to sleep, his body complaining that it was too cold without Blaine curled into his side, too quiet without Blaine's breath nearby. He'd let a few tears escape before telling himself that he had no reason to be sad. He was free now.
He'd waited three years, had all but given up hope that anything like this would ever happen. But now that he was free and in the city of his dreams, it all somehow felt empty. Wrong.
Cooper had taken him out for dinner when they'd gotten into the city, some fancy restaurant that Cooper swore he'd seen Robert De Niro in. Afterward, they'd walked through Central Park. It was beautiful in a way Kurt couldn't even begin to describe, but he found himself noticing little things, like how a spot looked perfect to show Blaine. He imagined all thing things they could do, read or talk, or Kurt could listen to Blaine play his guitar. All his thoughts drifted back to Blaine.
When he did fall asleep, thankfully, he didn't dream.
Sunlight was peeking through the curtains when Kurt woke up to the feeling of something strange.
There was a soft, muffled giggle next to him, but he quickly deduced that the sound wasn't what woke him. Something small was batting at the side of his chin repeatedly. It felt almost like a paw.
Unsure whether or not he was actually dreaming, his let his eyes slide open just in time to hear another giggle and feel something warm touch his face again. When his eyes finally made it all the way open, they were met by a pair of tiny blue ones. He blinked twice and reached forward, his hand brushing against a small, warm body that leaned happily into his touch.
The action was met by another soft giggle from close by. He turned his head to see Blaine smiling down at him.
"Blaine, you're here," he said, smiling sleepily. He yawned quietly and continued, quirking up an amused eyebrow. "With a kitten."
Blaine smiled and picked the fluffy gray and white tabby kitten up off of Kurt's chest. The cat purred and nuzzled under Blaine's chin. "I hated the thought of you sleeping in a bed by yourself when I'm not here, so I brought you someone to cuddle with."
"Blaine..." Kurt sighed fondly, leaning over to kiss him, breaking away giggling when the kitten started pawing at his cheek. He leaned down and kissed the small animal on its tiny, fluffy head. "Yes, yes, I love you, too."
Kurt took the kitten from Blaine's hands, cradling it to his chest. The grateful feline nuzzled against the front of his shirt.
"But...you're here?" Kurt said in a question.
Blaine's face lit up. "I'm here. My mom saw that I was miserable and decided to let me come early, though I don't think my dad knows."
"It doesn't matter," Kurt said with a smile. "You're here now and that's what matters."
Blaine curled in close to Kurt's side, the kitten side-eyeing him possessively, clearly unwilling to give up his spot on Kurt's lap. Blaine rested his head on Kurt's thigh and enjoyed the comfortable silence of everything being as it should be. He laughed as he felt the kitten nuzzling against his hair, pawing curiously at his curls.
"Where'd you find him anyway?" Kurt asked, scratching just behind the kitten's ear, making his tiny chest rumble with the sound of his quiet purring.
"Oh, I had the cab drop me off about a block away from the apartment, because I wanted to walk around a little, and I saw this little girl sitting on a blanket with a box in front of her. He was the only kitten left and her mom wouldn't let her keep him. I stopped to look and he reached up toward me. I couldn't just leave him there."
Kurt chuckled fondly, stretching down to kiss Blaine on the lips. "You just can't help yourself, can you?"
Blaine curled further into Kurt's side, feeling the heavy weight of his exhaustion and jet lag pressing down on him. "Nope," he mumbled sleepily, smiling up towards Kurt.
Kurt leaned down and kissed his forehead, stroking fingers across his cheek. "I'm so glad you're here, sweetheart."
"Mmm...me too..." Blaine trailed off.
Kurt pulled the comforter up around him, thankful that Blaine had the forethought to change into his pajamas. He set the kitten between them and pulled Blaine against his side, the unhappy kitten climbing right back to his spot on Kurt's chest. Kurt threaded his fingers through Blaine's curls and drifted to sleep comfortably.
-xXxXx-
Blaine!
Blaine sat up with a start at the sharp sound of Cooper's voice yelling through the apartment. "Uh-oh."
Kurt shifted until he was sitting up, leaning into Blaine's side, wrapping his arms around the younger boy's middle and rubbing his eyes. "What?"
Blaine didn't get a chance to answer before Cooper came storming through the door, a very unhappy expression on his face and a kitten looking around excitedly from the palm of his hand. The kitten lifted its little head and meowed up toward Cooper's face, nuzzling happily against his chest.
"Blaine, do you want to tell me why I found this curled up, asleep, in the sleeve of my brand new Hugo Boss suit?" He held up the kitten in one hand, pointing to it with the other. The oblivious kitten batted at the extended finger before stretching up to gnaw on it instead. Cooper rolled his eyes and tried to force down the smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
Kurt smiled and rolled out of bed, crossing the room and retrieving his kitten. He smiled slyly at Cooper, petting the happy kitten's head with his thumb. "He did it because he's got good taste. Don't you, sweetheart?" He cooed. The kitten reveled in the attention, nuzzling into Kurt's chest.
"Do you know how much that suit cost me?" Cooper asked, trying for exasperated.
Kurt snorted derisively and crossed back to the bed, dropping down beside Blaine and setting the kitten between them. It meowed unhappily and climbed back into his lap.
"I don't know where you got that thing," Cooper said, pointing at the kitten again. "But keep it out of my bedroom, off my bed, and out of my Hugo Boss suit jacket!" Cooper tried to be forceful, but the words broke off in a chuckle. Blaine laughed and reached over to scratch the kitten's head. "I mean it, you two. I now have cat hair on my Hugo Boss suit, Blaine. Hugo Boss."
Cooper gave the little nuisance a parting glare and left the room. Kurt giggled and slid closer to Blaine, lifting the kitten up and eskimo kissing his nose before setting him on Blaine. "I think I may have figured out the perfect name for our kitten," he laughed. He pressed a kiss to Blaine's lips before lying back down, the newly named, Hugo purring happily on Blaine's chest.
Blaine reached up and tangled his fingers with Kurt's against his chest, letting out a quiet contented sigh. "This is how it should be," he said quietly, lifting their intertwined hands to his lips to press a kiss to the back of Kurt's.
Kurt let out a sigh and craned his neck to kiss Blaine's forehead. "I just wish it could be like this all the time. You'd never have to leave and we could just lie here forever."
Blaine hummed out a sound of approval and slid himself closer to Kurt, smiling softly as he felt Kurt's arm automatically tighten around his shoulders. They laid in comfortable silence, the quiet only disturbed by the sound of a low curse from the living room as Cooper's phone rang.
There was tension in his voice when he spoke, and Blaine stiffened as he realized who Cooper was talking to on the phone. He looked to his side to see that Kurt had dozed back off, so he turned his head to drop a kiss to his chest before straightening up and sliding out of bed, going quietly out of the room and shutting the door behind him.
He sat down next to Cooper who had the bridge of his nose pinched in between his thumb and forefinger.
"No, dad, I understand where you're coming from, but you're wrong he-"
The shouting from the other end of the phone wasn't totally unexpected. Their father didn't take handle being told he was wrong well. Blaine could only make out a couple words, "...ungrateful...trash like that...sick perversion."
Cooper's eyes flashed at the last word and he reached out automatically to squeeze Blaine's hand.
"He loves Kurt, dad. There's nothing sick or perverted about it," Cooper answered, clearly struggling to keep his voice even and diplomatic.
Their father answered but Blaine couldn't make out any of his shouted words, but the way anger flashed through Cooper's eyes again and the way his hand instinctively gripped Blaine's tighter made Blaine glad that he couldn't hear.
"Listen, I'm not going to argue with you. This is what Blaine wants and you need to respect that. He's almost an adult. Blaine is your son and you should love and accept him for who he is, even if you don't completely agree-"
Cooper pulled the phone away from his ear and checked the screen, his eyes looking defeated and still angry. "He—He hung up on me."
"I'm so sorry for putting you through this. You don't deserve to be dragged through my drama," Blaine apologized, feeling guilty.
"Blaine, stop. Don't even think that. I'm here for you. Always have been. You know that."
"I know, but-"
"No buts, B. You're not taking this on alone." Cooper took a deep breath and set his phone down on the coffee table, straightening his spine and turning to Blaine, his eyes serious. "Blaine, I have a feeling that this is going to get worse before it gets better, but I need you to know that I'm here for you, no matter what. No matter what happens, you've got a place to call home, alright?"
Cold reality washed over Blaine as Cooper's words, and their implication, sunk in.
"Dad was really mad, wasn't he?" Blaine asked sheepishly, already knowing the answer.
"Yeah."
Blaine dropped his eyes to the floor. He'd long since stopped looking for approval from his father, but there's always something about knowing the fact that his father refers to his love for Kurt as a "sick perversion" that made his heart ache. He knew his father disapproved of his "lifestyle choice", but he never knew the real extent of his father's disapproval.
Cooper could see the sadness in Blaine's eyes. He clapped a hand on his little brother's shoulder and leaned down to meet his gaze. "Blaine, Kurt loves you and you love him. That's what matters. Don't let anything dad says make you doubt that. Got it?"
Blaine sniffled and looked toward his brother's face. "What if dad says I have to come home or he makes me go to a shrink or something?"
"Shh...Blaine..." Cooper's face was a mask of sadness. He took a deep breath and tried again. His tone was serious as though he was trying to convey a point. "Blaine, I don't think the issue would lie with him making you come home. I think the issue is whether you're going home at all."
Blaine's eyes widened, tears threatening to spill over. "Oh."
"But, I don't want you to worry, Blaine," Cooper was quick to add, scooting closer and wrapping his arm tightly around his brother's shoulders. "I was kinda expecting something like this, so I called and got you into the same school as Kurt. It'll be a different program—you'll be more mainstream than he is—but you can take online classes and graduate on time."
Blaine looked up to meet his brother's eyes, his face incredulous. "What?"
His voice was no higher than a breath. How long had he been in the dark about his father's disgust over his life? How much did Cooper know?
"When I saw the way you'd look at Kurt, I knew that there was something more there, even if you didn't know it yet. I could see how much you cared about him, and I knew that I'd never seen anyone make you happier than Kurt. You laugh around him. You smile more. And I knew that it would be hard for you at home, having to hide from dad, but I also knew that, one day, he'd find out. I just wanted to make everything as easy as possible for you, Blaine."
Cooper's voice broke off on the last word, his eyes brimming with tears. He cleared his throat and continued.
"B, I know it's been really hard growing up with mom and dad being gone so much. I tried to make sure that you always had someone there when you came home, someone to talk to about your day and help you with your homework, but I know it wasn't the same. But I tried so hard to make sure that you knew that someone was there for you no matter what-"
"I did, Coop," Blaine smiled sadly and squeezed his brother's hand. Cooper returned the gesture and the weak smile before continuing.
"I'm not saying it was ideal by any means, but I like to think that I did well by you. You know right from wrong, and I've never met anyone more compassionate. Which is why it shocked me so much when mom called to brag that you got a worker." His voice twisted around the last word. "I couldn't believe it. It broke my heart, but as soon as I got home and saw what a mess you where, I felt guilty for even entertaining the thought that your intentions were anything less than pure.
"I watched Kurt get better and smile more, and every time he'd smile or do the smallest thing, you would just get so happy. He made you happy. And I wanted that for you, Blaine. You deserve someone who is just as amazing as you are, and Kurt is perfect for you. You two deserve each other and I'm not going to let anyone—especially dad—get in the way of something that makes you both so happy. He doesn't get to come in now, this late in your life, and decide to play the father figure. He doesn't get to do that. He hasn't earned it."
Blaine's eyes were wide and he could feel tears streaking down his cheeks as he watched Cooper with incredulity. "Coop...I—I don't know what to say..." he stuttered. "Thank you. For—For everything."
"You don't have to thank me," Cooper answered, clearing his throat to even out his voice. "Just...take care of Kurt, alright. I'm not sure how he's going to take to living in a city with so many people right away. He was kind of jumpy last night. But you always seem to calm him down, so..." Cooper trailed off. "Just—Just watch him, alright. Make sure he's okay."
Blaine gave a small smile and leaned in for another hug, squeezing briefly before pulling away. "I will, Coop."
They both turned at the sound of a small commotion coming from Blaine's bedroom followed by a low oath and a giggled apology. Kurt appeared in the doorway holding Hugo, blushing when he saw two sets of eyes on him.
"He was sitting by the side of the bed waiting for me to get up and I didn't see him. I almost went right over the top of him." Kurt laughed softly, leaning down and kissing the kitten's little head. "I'm sorry, sweetheart," he cooed. Hugo nuzzled into his chest, so clearly Kurt's transgression was forgiven.
Cooper laughed and smacked Blaine on the thigh. "Alright, I want you two dressed and out of here in an hour. You're showing Kurt around the city."
Blaine cocked his head to the side, smiling. "I am?"
"Yep. You've both been cooped up for too long. Get out and have fun. Be teenagers for once in your life," Cooper instructed fondly.
After having money thrown at them, Kurt and Blaine left for the day. As they made it to a taxi, Blaine finally asked, "So, where to?"
Kurt's face lit up. "How about we go to Central Park? I saw the prettiest place and I want to show you," he said excitedly. Blaine laced their fingers and nodded to the cab driver.
It turned out, after stretching out underneath a tree in the April sunshine, there wasn't much energy for anything else, not when lying together in the shade and watching the wind play through the surrounding trees and flowers just seemed like the perfect way to spend an afternoon. By the time the sun set, the evening chill was starting to set in.
Blaine wrapped his jacket around Kurt's shoulders and grabbed his hand, deciding to take the time to walk back to the apartment instead of taking a cab. Kurt's eyes sparkled as he took in his surroundings. Blaine couldn't even bring himself to speak, so he just watched the excitement and unreadable emotion play itself out beautifully across Kurt's face.
By the time they made it back to Cooper's apartment, the sun had set completely.
"If we go out on the fire escape, the lights of the city are amazing," Blaine commented. His words were only met by a soft expression in Kurt's eyes. Kurt leaned over and kissed him on the lips softly, his hand coming up to cup the younger boy's cheek.
Slowly, Kurt pulled away, a gentle smile playing on his lips. "I love you so much, Blaine."
Blaine's answering smile was dazzling, and he leaned forward slightly to kiss Kurt again. "I love you, too."
The mood changed when the elevator doors opened and they stepped into the hallway. Blaine suddenly realized why Cooper had wanted he and Kurt out of the apartment that afternoon when they heard harsh shouting coming from Cooper's apartment, the voices barely muffled by the door. Kurt squeezed Blaine's hand tightly, rubbing soothing circles into the space between his thumb and forefinger as they listened.
Cooper's voice was furious. "No, you listen to me, you've got no right trying to lay down the law in his life. When he needed you, you weren't there so you sure as hell don't get any say now when he doesn't need you! I fucking raised your son while you were out jetsetting. If you wanted to have any say in his life you should have stayed home and been a real father!"
"Cooper, all you're doing is encouraging this sick behavior, and I won't-"
"You're damn right I'm encouraging it. And there's nothing 'sick' about it. You're just to blind to see that! I don't want you here when he gets back. You said what you came to say now I want you the hell out of my apartment and out of Blaine's life!"
Kurt turned to look at Blaine and saw his crestfallen face. He squeezed the younger boy's hand a little tighter. "Come on, sweetheart, let's just go."
Blaine shook his head. "No, this isn't Cooper's problem to fix. I need to go in and talk to my father."
"No, you don't," Kurt said quickly. "There's nothing you need to say or do for him. And I'm sure that nothing he's going to say is going to be good. Blaine, I hate the way he talks to you. I just-"
"I know, Kurt, but I just need to try," Blaine said, dejected.
Kurt took a deep breath, still clearly very unhappy with the decision and leaned forward to turn the doorknob, kissing Blaine on the cheek before opening the door for him.
Kurt squeezed Blaine's hand as he followed him through the door, barely a step behind.
Two pairs of eye met them the moment they stepped through the door. Cooper's eyes were wide and anxious, looking ready to throw himself in the middle of whatever conflict he was so clearly expecting, and Blaine's father's eyes, which were furious.
The man crossed the room quickly and Kurt immediately positioned Blaine behind himself, stiffening his spine defensively. The look in Blaine's father's eyes sent fire racing through his body, he knew exactly what accompanied that kind of anger and he'd be damned if any of that wrath would be inflicted on Blaine.
"Move! This has nothing to do with you. This is between my son and I," the man spat, trying to strong-arm Kurt aside.
Kurt wouldn't be moved. "No, it has everything to do with me. I love him and if you want to lay a hand on him, you're going to have to get through me first." Kurt's voice was nothing short of a growl.
Blaine's father looked affronted, his anger rising by the second. "I'm telling you one last time: Move."
"And I'm telling you that there's no way in hell I'm letting you touch him. Now, I think Cooper told you to leave..."
"Yes, I did," Cooper added, his voice much closer than Kurt was expecting. He had come to stand on the other side of his father, his arms crossed in front of his chest.
Kurt nodded and turned away from Blaine just a bit, feeling a little safer with Cooper so close. He pointed toward the door. "Now, unless you'd like some help leaving, I suggest you go now. And don't come back. Blaine doesn't need someone as toxic and hateful as you in his life. So get the hell out!"
The man stood frozen, his entire body shaking with rage. "How dare you speak to me that way? You disgusting little reject! I wish he would have just let you die. We'd all be better off!"
Blaine lunged forward and, before Kurt could even process what had happened, the sound of a punch landing echoed through the room. Kurt surged forward and grabbed Blaine.
Blaine was screaming as he fought against the hold that Kurt now had on his waist.
"You bitter, hateful, ignorant man! How could you say that? No one deserves what Kurt's been through and you just continue to make it worse, because your bigoted mind won't let you see that Kurt is just like us, except better! He's smart and funny and kind and beautiful and you won't even give him a chance!"
His father had pulled himself together from the hard punch to the jaw and was stabbing a finger toward Kurt and shouting. "No, I won't give him a chance, because what you're doing is wrong! It's sick, Blaine!"
Cooper snarled and grabbed his father's arm, clearly getting ready to begin his own verbal assault, but Blaine cut him off.
"Well, let me tell you something," Blaine bit out, his voice low and even, brimming with barely tamped down rage. "There has never been a single second when I lived with you when I felt loved and cared for the way I feel living with Cooper and Kurt. Family is supposed to support you and encourage you to be happy, not tell you that you're sick or that your love is a 'perversion', and you never did that, so I'd rather stay here and be sick with Kurt than come back to Ohio and be healthy with you. Because you're the one that's sick. Your hatred and closed-mindedness has made you sick, and I almost feel bad for you."
Cooper nodded and gave Blaine a tense smile of encouragement before squeezing his father's arm again. "I believe that Blaine has made himself clear. Now leave," Cooper demanded, his voice low and threatening.
The man straightened up and opened his mouth as though he was about to snap a retort to Cooper, but saw the look that promised violence and apparently thought better of it. Cooper used his grip on his father's arm to shove him roughly toward the door, slamming it behind the man the second he stepped outside.
Kurt whirled Blaine around until they were facing, surging forward to connect their lips, tears streaming down his face. "I love you, Blaine. So much," he breathed against Blaine's lips, his hands coming up to frame the shorter boy's face.
Blaine's face crumbled, the anger and shock falling away to complete devastation and Kurt pulled him tight against his chest as if he could hold him together, whispering soothing nonsense into his ear as he felt the sobs wracking Blaine's body.
Cooper sounded concerned when he caught sight of Blaine. "Take him to bed, Kurt. Make him lie down for a little while." Kurt nodded, and turned to lead Blaine toward the bedroom, stopping when Cooper called out a quiet, "Wait."
He framed his brother's face with his hands and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "I'm so proud of you, B. You stood up for the people you love, and I know that all of this sucks, but you should be proud of that. Because I am. I'm so proud to be your big brother, Blaine." The words were barely whispered by the end, Cooper's eyes filling with tears.
Blaine threw himself toward his brother, wrapping his arms tightly around the older boy's middle. Cooper returned the embrace with just as much force. "I love you, Cooper," Blaine said through tears.
Cooper pulled him tighter. "I love you, too, Blaine."
They pulled away slowly and Kurt was there with open arms to wrap around Blaine's waist and a small smile to Cooper before taking Blaine into the bedroom. The shaking in the smaller boy's body had subsided and the way he was walking just seemed tired, completely and totally exhausted.
Kurt was thankful that it was late enough to be acceptable to go to bed. He could hear Cooper getting himself ready for bed, apparently just as eager to put the night behind him as Kurt was. Kurt helped Blaine out of his clothes and into bed, opening his arms and letting him curl into his side.
Blaine laid in silent thought for a few minutes, his head pillowed on Kurt's bare chest, sliding his thumb across his collarbone. Even in the silent room, Kurt barely heard Blaine speak. "Kurt?"
"What, sweetheart?" He asked, his fingers threading through the boy's curls.
"Do you think my dad was going to hit me when I walked in?"
A fresh wave of anger flashed through Kurt, but he pushed it down. Blaine was safe now. "Yes."
The next question came just as quickly as the last. "What would you have done?"
Kurt didn't even have to think before he knew his answer. "Much worse than you did, that's for sure."
Blaine turned his head and pressed an appreciative kiss to Kurt's chest and fell back into silence. Kurt was almost sure that he'd fallen asleep and leaned down to drop a kiss to the top of Blaine's curls before letting his own eyes slip closed.
Again, Blaine spoke, his voice soft and inquisitive. "Kurt? What are we?"
Kurt opened his eyes, his face screwing up in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"Earlier, when I was yelling at my father, I almost called you my boyfriend, but that didn't seem right. It almost seemed reductive. It's just that..." Blaine pulled in a deep breath and let it out in a gust. "We've been through so much together that 'boyfriends' just didn't seem to fit."
Silence settled over them as Kurt thought about Blaine's words, his fingers still threading through the younger boy's curls. "I hadn't actually thought about it," Kurt said honestly.
It was true. Since he'd found out that Blaine shared his feelings, the feelings he'd been terrified to show, afraid that, if he voiced them, the best thing that ever happened in his life would just pop like a soap bubble.
Once Blaine had kissed him, completely flipping his world on its head, he couldn't bring himself to question anything, just to hold on to it for dear life. In his opinion, they didn't need a label. Any label they could put on their relationship didn't seem to fit.
Blaine's soft voice interrupted his thoughts. "Well, what do you see when you look at me?"
A wide smile crossed Kurt's face and he leaned down to press a kiss to the boy's forehead. "I just see my Blaine," Kurt said with a smile. "My amazing, beautiful, sweet Blaine."
Blaine's face lit up with a dazzling smile and he slid out from under Kurt's arms, shifting to straddle Kurt's waist, looking toward his face with pure adoration in his eyes. "I can be your Blaine."
He leaned forward and brushed his lips against Kurt's, his hands framing the older boy's face, kissing him once more sweetly before pulling back and resting his forehead against Kurt's.
"And I'll always be your Kurt," Kurt whispered, the breath ghosting across Blaine's lips.
"My perfect Kurt," Blaine said in a reverent breath, bringing their lips together in a featherlight dance that grew desperate quickly. They broke away, breathless. Blaine rested his forehead against Kurt's and rolled his hips down against the hard line straining the front of Kurt's briefs.
Kurt lifted a hand to cup Blaine's jaw and pull him closer, letting his tongue slide across the seam of Blaine's barely parted lips before crashing them together. "B-Blaine...need you..." was all that Kurt was able to stutter out, his hands falling on Blaine's hips and dragging them down with more force.
It was all the coaxing Blaine needed. He pressed a final kiss to Kurt's lips before kissing down his neck and chest, pausing to nip lightly at each of Kurt's hipbones, making Kurt arch off the bed and tighten his hold on Blaine's curls.
Blaine hooked his thumbs under the waistband of Kurt's underwear and kissed along the elastic before sliding them down Kurt's legs and tossing them aside and settling on his knees between Kurt's legs, still holding his left leg and pressing a kiss to the bone of his ankle, his calf, the side of his knee, and sliding his thumb over a patch of scars on the the inside of his thigh before dropping a reverent kiss there as well.
Kurt squirmed on the sheets and a small noise slid past his lips. Blaine massaged Kurt's thighs as he dropped kisses to his stomach, one hand sliding up the smooth skin of his thigh to wrap warm fingers around Kurt's hard length, stroking slowly for a moment before tapping Kurt on the hip so that he'd look down to where Blaine was pressing a kiss to the head of his cock, wrapping his lips around it and sinking down.
"Oh God, Blaine," Kurt gasped, his fingers tightening in Blaine's hair and watching his cock disappear into Blaine's warm, willing mouth.
Seconds later, he nudged at Blaine's shoulder desperately and Blaine pulled off, still stroking Kurt with the hand that wasn't sliding across Kurt's inner thigh. "Too close?" He asked. Kurt whined and nodded.
Blaine made to stretch out next to Kurt, to let Kurt get him ready, but Kurt had a hand on his shoulder to stop him, his eyes completely lust blown but filled with love and adoration as well as something that Blaine couldn't quite place. Trust, maybe?
"Blaine, I—I want you tonight," Kurt said quietly, reaching up to slide his thumb across the apple of Blaine's cheek.
"Kurt, are you sure? We don't have to. I mean I know you've..." The sentence broke off. He had no idea how he'd planned to finish it.
"I trust you, Blaine. I know that you'd never hurt me, and if I said 'stop', there wouldn't be any hesitation; you'd stop. I love you, and I wish it would have been you the first time..."
"It kind of is your first time, Kurt," Blaine pointed out, leaning down to kiss him. "None of those other times count, sweetheart. Not to me, and they shouldn't count for you either. You didn't want it." Kurt swallowed thickly, so Blaine kissed him again. "This will be the first time anyone has made love to you, Kurt, and that means more to me than anything."
A small smile touched Kurt's face and Blaine brushed their lips together again and continued. "We're doing this because we both want to. Because we're young, stupid, and madly in love."
Kurt's face lit up into Blaine's favorite smile, the one that showed his teeth and made his eyes sparkle. It never failed to take Blaine's breath away. There were tears brimming in Kurt's soft eyes and Blaine smiled and wiped them away with his thumb as Kurt spoke. "I love you so much, Blaine. You'll never know what you've done for me. And I just love you. So much."
"Shh..." Blaine was quick to soothe. "I love you, too."
Blaine held himself over Kurt, kissing him as Kurt's fingers trailed teasingly along his bare sides before pushing at the waistband of his underwear, sliding them down at an awkward angle until he was able to catch them with his toes and pull them off. Blaine giggled softly and kissed Kurt's lips. "Very impressive, sweetheart."
Kurt smiled and framed Blaine's face with his hands again before bringing their lips together, lifting his hips to meet Blaine's, eliciting a clipped gasp at the sudden friction. Blaine leaned to the side, opening his nightstand drawer and pulling out a bottle of lube. He paused and let his eyes take in the image of Kurt, naked and trusting, and the realization began to sink into his lust hazed brain that he had no idea what he was doing.
Kurt apparently saw the completely lost expression on Blaine's face because he smiled gently and took the bottle from his hands with a quick kiss on the lips. "Watch me, and you can do it next time, sweetheart."
Blaine nodded and slid his flat palms across Kurt's chest as he watched his hand disappear between his legs, listening to Kurt's breath become thready and his eyes flutter closed. Blaine was transfixed by the blush that had colored Kurt's face and was spreading to the top of his pale chest. He couldn't fight the urge to drop kisses to the flushed skin, giving little kitten licks to the pebbled bud of Kurt's nipple.
"Oh God, Blaine," Kurt breathed, his free hand coming to rest on the back of the younger boy's head. "Up here. K-Kiss me..."
Blaine didn't hesitate before surging their lips together in a messy, desperate, and completely perfect kiss. A fresh wave of arousal shot through Blaine's body as Kurt whined against his lips, his fingers gripping the back of Blaine's hair tighter. Kurt pulled away, his breath coming out in pants.
"I need you," Kurt breathed, kissing Blaine again once on the lips.
Blaine kissed him as he shifted until he was over top of Kurt's body, thumbing open the cap of the lube and slicking himself up, sucking open mouthed kisses to anywhere his mouth could reach, murmuring soft endearments into Kurt's skin.
He straightened up, his eyes never leaving Kurt's, and positioned his cock at Kurt's opening, pushing in with a bit of pressure until he head disappeared inside his body. Kurt's eyes had fluttered closed again and his chest was rising and falling with each quickened breath.
"You're so beautiful, Kurt," Blaine said breathlessly. He let his hand slide across Kurt's stomach, hoping to coax Kurt into opening his eyes. It worked. Blaine leaned down as he pushed in slowly until he bottomed out, kissing Kurt on the lips before pulling back and brushing away a stray lock of hair on his forehead. "I love you so much, Kurt."
Tears were shining in Kurt's eyes as he stretched up to kiss Blaine fully on the lips, his arms winding themselves around the back of Blaine's neck to pull him closer. "I love you, too. So perfect, Blaine." Kurt's voice was breathy and low. "Y-You can move. I'm okay."
Blaine slid out and connected their lips before rolling his hips into Kurt, swallowing the moan that escaped Kurt at the action. Kurt's legs wrapped around Blaine's waist, pulling him closer, coaxing him in deeper. A low groan rumbled in Blaine's throat as he started rolling his hips in earnest, his head falling into the hollow of Kurt's shoulder, the tight, delicious drag coupled with the soft, perfect sounds falling from Kurt's lips pulling him to the edge quickly.
Kurt was meeting his thrusts, rocking his body down against Blaine, quiet desperate whines pouring from his mouth. "S-So close, Blaine. Kiss me. P—Please-"
Blaine cut off the rambling with his lips, kissing Kurt deeply, licking into his mouth and massaging Kurt's tongue with his own until Kurt broke away, his head falling back against the pillow. A quiet stream of pleas fell from his lips and his fingers tangled tighter into Blaine's hair as the younger boy's lips found his neck, sucking tenderly at the rapidly fluttering pulse.
Kurt was gripping his bicep hard enough that there would more than likely be bruises, but Blaine couldn't bring himself to care, too focused on the needy, breathy whines coming from Kurt as he got closer to coming. "Blaine, please, right there-Oh my God-right there, please..."
The words broke off with a gasp as Kurt's body arched off the mattress, his cock twitching as he spilled his release between their bodies, breathless moans slipping unashamedly from his throat as he pulled Blaine closer and held him tight against his body, his chest heaving.
Seeing Kurt fall apart was the most beautiful thing Blaine had ever seen and it was enough to send him over the edge, crying out his release into the hollow of Kurt's throat as he thrust into him once, twice more before stilling, his arms shaking as they tried to support his weight over Kurt.
He felt Kurt's fingers stroking the side of his face and leaned into the touch, letting his eyes flutter open to see Kurt's face, adoring and gentle. "So beautiful, Blaine. So perfect."
Blaine let himself collapse, rolling to the side and kissing Kurt, languid and indulgent. Kurt broke away just long enough to pull up the comforter. Blaine curled into Kurt's side and kissed him again until he was too tired to keep going, letting his head fall into the hollow of Kurt's shoulder and humming out a content sigh as he felt fingers come up to thread through his hair.
Kurt dropped a kiss to the top of his curls. "Sleep, sweetheart. I love you."
"Mmm...love you, too," Blaine murmured sleepily, turning his head weakly to press a kiss against the column of Kurt's neck and letting himself drift to sleep, warm and content.
-xXxXx-
"I don't think I can..." Kurt said softly, his voice low and distant.
Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist and stood in silence as Kurt contemplated the metal band he was twisting between his long fingers. He could just barely see the tears shining in Kurt's eyes as he lifted his head, looked over the banister of the pier and stared out at the water.
Kurt's hands shook so Blaine steadied them in his own. "You can do this, sweetheart," he assured, pressing a kiss to the side of Kurt's neck. "You can do anything."
Kurt took a deep breath and stepped out of the circle of Blaine's arms, reaching down to take Blaine's hand as he steadied himself and cocked his arm back, his face screwed up with determination and contempt, and threw the slaveband so far out over the water that Blaine lost track of it in the setting sunlight.
Tears were streaming silently down Kurt's face and Blaine pulled him tightly into his arms, kissing him with everything he had, his hands framing the taller boy's face. "I love you so much, Kurt, and I am so proud of you."
There was a new light in Kurt's eyes as he listened to Blaine's words. "I love you, too, Blaine." The words were so sincere and earnest that they sent warmth flooding through Blaine's body. He leaned forward and kissed Kurt again before pulling away, taking his hand again.
"Let's go home," Blaine said softly.
A blinding smile lit up Kurt's face and he nodded. "Let's go home."
Blaine lifted their intertwined hands to his lips and pressed a kiss to the back of Kurt's as they walked away from the pier without a backward glance.